How Pan even got a hold of a Sleeping Curse, Hook would never know.
The fact that he dared to use it on Emma?
If the demon child wasn't already trapped in the Crocodile's box, Hook would kill him.
Hook had felt himself freeze the moment Emma fell unconscious, caught in her father's arms, barely registering the events. The Crocodile captured the demon moments later, but the damage was done.
Emma was unresponsive in her father's arms, and Hook's heart was a stone in his chest.
Immediately, both her mother and father tried True Love's Kiss, to no avail.
According to the Crocodile, Pan had somehow forged a Curse that required romantic love to break it.
Somehow Hook managed to find enough words to convince them to get her on the ship. The longer they were on the island, the worse things could become. The demon may be neutralized but the dangers of the island remained.
When Pan had attacked Emma, Neal had been with her lad, getting him to safety.
Now, as Hook stood among the rest of them—Emma's parents, Regina, Henry, even the bloody Crocodile—in his Captain's Cabin, they all watched Neal slowly lower Emma to Hook's bed.
Hook had joked to her enough times how badly he wanted her in his bed.
He wanted to take back every single one, because this was not how.
Baelfire—Neal, straightened, looking slightly unsure as he looked down at Emma. He swallowed. "Could—ah," he said, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked at the group. "Could we be… alone? If you all don't mind…"
Hook swallowed. Baelfire was quite unsure of himself, for someone who had at first seemed quite confident in waking Emma. Who shared a child with her, who was her first—and probably current—love.
But the group, as one, gave a little nod, and filed out of the room.
Hook lingered a moment longer, then followed.
As the rest of them went back up to the deck, Hook lingered at the door, watching through the crack.
Waiting for the shattering moment of Baelfire proving that Emma was and always will be his.
Neal hesitated, before kneeling down at Emma's side. He let out a breath. "I love you, Ems," he said quietly to her. Then, he leaned over and he kissed her.
Hook waited, his chest tight.
Waited for her eyes to open.
For his last hope and desire in life to fade away.
Baelfire and Hook watched her, but her eyes remained shut.
She was still asleep.
No.
As horribly as Hook had planned to feel, he felt worse.
Baelfire was her only chance.
If this Curse was only broken by True Love that was romantic, Emma didn't have any other options they knew about.
She'd be asleep forever.
And as much as Hook wanted her, wished she could love him, he wanted her awake and alive more. Even if that meant she was awake and alive… and in love with Baelfire.
"No," breathed Baelfire. He leaned over her, kissed her again.
Nothing.
"No," he repeated, more desperately. "There's something wrong."
He quickly stood, moving toward the door.
Hook smoothly pulled himself away, ducking into the crew's cabin and into the shadows around the corner.
Baelfire hurried down the hall and up the stairs to the deck, calling for his father.
Hook cautiously stepped out of the room, and looked toward his cabin.
Letting out a breath, he walked inside.
Emma was so still.
He'd never known her to be so still.
He hated it.
He'd much rather her swing a compass at his head than be this still.
He knelt beside her, brushing a strand of hair over her forehead. "I should just have bloody told you," he whispered. "I love you, Emma."
The admission was a whisper, and it made him smile. It held as much joy as it did grief.
Because he saw the way she looked at Baelfire.
She loved him.
She'd said as much when they'd left Baelfire's Neverland home. That she'd never stopped loving him.
Hook had laid his own heart out to dry in the Echo Cave, and Emma hadn't said a word.
And not only moments later, he watched her shed tears for another man and melt into his embrace.
She loved Baelfire, and therefore she would never love him.
Horrible pain in Hook's chest made it hard to breathe, that thought, that realization, squeezing the life out of him.
Hook brushed another strand of hair over Emma's forehead, never having been so close to her for so long. Never truly getting to see her beauty like this before. He smiled involuntarily, because she was so beautiful, she simply elicited joy from any eyes that laid on her. He was lucky enough to have met her, let alone had the chance to kiss her in that one moment that he was certain was, and will always be, the greatest moment of his life.
But that pain in his chest crept in, because she was not in love with him, and she never would be.
She was in love with another man.
Perhaps there was something wrong with the Curse, some other condition Baelfire needed to meet.
No matter how much it hurt that it couldn't be him, that it wasn't him, all Hook wanted was for her to open her eyes. To see her smile, for her to live a happy life. Even if it wasn't at his side. So he prayed that the Crocodile would find a way for his son to break the curse he alone was meant to break.
Hook sighed, watching her sleep.
Some very small part of him, buried down beneath centuries of self-loathing and sadness, whispered something in the back of his mind. It broke through what was now a suffocating amount of pain in his chest.
It took him a moment to decipher what the feeling was.
Hope.
He briefly shut his eyes.
It won't work.
It won't.
But that little part in him spoke a little louder, asking him to try.
And so, with the hesitance of a sailor steering into the eye of a storm, he leaned over her, pressing his lips softly to hers in a gentle kiss, one he so wished he could wake her up with every morning for the rest of her life.
Something tingled his lips, something almost… warm.
But half a second later, footsteps suddenly thundered across the deck toward his quarters; they were coming below deck.
Not wanting to be caught, Hook quickly pulled away and stood, leaving his cabin, ducking back into the crew's quarters before anyone could descend the stairs.
Baelfire, followed by his father and Emma's parents, descended the steps and returned to Hook's cabin.
Hook knocked his head against the wall, shutting his eyes.
"I tried, twice," Baelfire was saying as they walked into the room. "But I—Emma?!"
Hook heard Emma's parents gasp.
And then—
"Where the hell am I?"
Emma.
Emma.
Her voice.
She was awake.
She—
Hook froze.
Did he…?
He hadn't looked at her after he'd kissed her, too afraid to be caught at her bedside like a fool when he'd heard them on deck.
He touched his lips.
That warmth.
Did he really…?
Hook slowly walked out of the room, standing in the open doorway to his cabin, watching her in utter shock.
Emma was pushing herself up from the bed, and Baelfire grabbed her in an embrace.
"It worked!" he cried over her shoulder.
"What worked?" mumbled Emma.
He pulled back, the biggest smile on his face. "True Love's Kiss," he said. "It took a little longer than I thought it should, but it worked!" His smile grew.
Emma, still looking tired and very confused, looked even more confused.
Hook, however, felt like he couldn't breathe.
Emma's mother sat on the bed beside her, tears in her eyes as she pulled her into a hug. "Pan put you under a Sleeping Curse. Your father and I couldn't wake you. Neal did."
Emma blinked, looking from her to Neal and back. "He did?"
She sounded so confused.
Hook still couldn't breathe.
"My own daughter," said the prince, his turn to hug Emma, "the product of True Love, found hers. I couldn't be happier." To Neal, he said, "Thank you for saving her."
Joy and relief filled the entire cabin.
Hook forced a smile and tried not to suffocate in it.
Hook stood at the helm of the ship, watching the clouds slip past as the Jolly sailed through the sky.
He took another swig from the flask, attempting to numb more feelings.
The day had been filled with joy at Henry's rescue, but more recently, Emma's.
Baelfire was over the moon, and all day long, Hook had listened to him tell his boy about all of the things he and his mother were planning to do when they returned home. Find a house. Build a home.
Be a family.
Hook let more rum burn down his throat.
He'd woken her.
He—Hook—had woken her.
He still couldn't fathom it.
True Love.
Bloody True Love.
With Emma.
He didn't have the heart to tell her.
Not that she'd believe him.
Not that anyone would.
Emma seemed to have no recollection of whose lips had woken her, and if he even tried to mention it, he doubted it would help his case. He'd come off jealous, petty.
But more than that…
The reason his flask was now empty…
Was because it was better this way.
It should be Baelfire.
It should be her lad's father.
It should be a hero.
It shouldn't be a pirate.
It shouldn't be a villain.
Even if he was trying, with every fiber of his being, to change and atone that.
It shouldn't be him.
But just because he knew they would make a better family, that they shouldn't need to know the truth, it didn't make it hurt any less.
He'd just been shown proof that it was possible, that it was real, what he wanted.
But that didn't mean he deserved it.
And if he truly loved her—and now there was no denying it—he would let her build a home and a family with someone who could give her the one she deserved.
Even if he himself would do anything for her, anything at all.
"Hey."
Hook jumped a little, startled from his thoughts—the rum probably not helping—and he turned to see Emma climbing the stairs.
With surprise—and pain he tried hard to swallow—he said, "Swan? Shouldn't you be… resting?"
"I've had my share," she said dryly. She walked to the side of the ship, a few feet away from him. She watched the clouds go by for a moment before looking at him. "I haven't seen much of you today." she commented. When he said nothing—couldn't trust himself to speak—she asked, "Why aren't you sleeping?"
Hook gestured to the wheel. "Someone's got to keep an eye on her."
Emma hm'd, looking back at the clouds in the dark sky.
Hook felt tension grow.
But he was probably the only one feeling it.
"I'm glad you're all right, Emma," he said quietly.
She smiled a little. "Me, too."
"Baelfire…" he said, trying to ignore the pain in his chest. "He is a lucky man," he whispered.
He does not know how lucky.
Emma just kept staring at the clouds.
She smiled a little.
"So, you weren't going to tell me, then."
Hook froze.
She slowly turned from the sky to him, that little smile playing at her lips. Her unwavering gaze found his incredulous one.
"What?" he managed.
"Who woke me," she said softly. Then, with a meaningful look, she said, "I know it was you."
Hook felt his breath leave him. "I…" But she was so sure. It was in her eyes. She did know. He faltered. "You… how?" he breathed.
Emma smiled a little, and something rare, something almost like shyness touched her features. "I didn't see anyone when I woke up, but I just… I had this… feeling," she said slowly, not meeting his eyes. She hesitated on the next words, but said them anyway. "I had the same feeling when I… when we…"
She didn't say it, didn't seem to be able to, but Hook heard it nonetheless.
Their kiss, from days ago.
He'd hoped she'd felt something, could have sworn she did, but with everything that happened since—
Hook stared at her, speechless.
Meeting his eyes, there was that shy smile that looked so out of place on her. "I just knew." She approached him, then, her brows furrowed. "The only thing I don't know," she said quietly, "is why you didn't say anything."
His eyes found the floorboards. "Emma," he said, voice pained. He shut his eyes, speaking aloud the words that have been playing in his head all day. "You deserve more than me, love."
It was different when he'd thought Baelfire was dead.
It was different before he'd seen Emma's obvious love for him.
It was different after he'd already ruined countless families.
He couldn't do it again.
Not to her.
"And you think Neal could give me that?"
He met her eyes, surprised to see her brow raised, her tone unimpressed.
Hook swallowed. "He's the father to your son," he said slowly, numbly. "He… loves you."
"He also set me up for his crime and left me to go to jail for him," said Emma, with a touch of heat, "right after he knocked me up." With a short sigh, she said, "Granted, he didn't know, but he's still not exactly hero material. It's not like he ever cared to come back and see if I was even okay. He can't exactly promise to 'never stop fighting for me' when he already broke it several times over." she muttered.
Hook blinked.
That was their history?
And even more shocking, something that managed to loosen the tight hold around his heart—
She didn't love him back?
Emma sighed, seeing what must be clear shock written all over Hook's face. "Did you think I wanted it to be Neal?"
Hook's silence was enough of an answer.
Emma let out a little breath, like she was exasperated with his little self-worth. Then, she stepped to him, kissing him lightly on the cheek. Hook shut his eyes at it, her kiss sending chills down his spine and warmth in his chest.
"Thank you, Killian." she whispered.
He looked at her, feeling a little smile at his own lips. Killian. Warmth in his chest grew.
Hope in his chest grew.
Emma turned to go back under deck, but paused. She looked back at him. "I'm glad it was you," she said softly.
Hook smiled at her, feeling something indescribable when she returned it, almost as if there was some sort of promise in her expression, that this was only the beginning of something wonderful, before she disappeared beneath the deck.
"I'm glad it was you."
He smiled to himself.
That certainly made two of them.