Hinata didn't know that her chance meeting with Temari would lead to a very embarrassing letter several weeks down the road. Hinata didn't know that one day, soon, very soon, she would be the subject of an exceedingly awkward Five Kage Summit with a terrified Raikage, an enraged Mizukage, a confused Kazekage, a long-suffering Hokage, and a Tsuchikage with immense back pain.
Hinata didn't know a lot of things, and she would have preferred to keep it that way.
"Unfortunately, your vacation has to come to an end, Hinata." Tsunade-sama gave her a sympathetic look over a pile of paperwork. Tonton oinked in commiseration. "You're a highly in-demand chuunin, mission requests keep pouring in, and...well, I have a village income to manage."
Hinata did her best to put on a brave face and not look like a wilting sunflower. However, she strongly suspected that she wasn't successful, because Tsunade-sama hastened to soften the blow.
"You can still keep your pay raise!" the Godaime said kindly. "And if anyone bothers you on these missions, just let me know, and I'll knock some sense into them." She cracked her knuckles to reassure Hinata.
Hinata was not reassured.
She tried not to cringe at the fact that she was assigned to go solo for her vacation-ending mission. It was a C-rank merchant escort mission through a well-traveled, safe, and secure path to the border between Fire and Lightning Country, where Konoha conveniently had an outpost, thus justifying the lack of teammates, the guy at the mission desk said.
Hinata was a big girl. She could handle it.
Hopefully.
And the man had paid a ton of money just to "have one-on-one time" with Hinata, probably to get her autograph. Cash talked at the Konoha mission desk, even when logic and standard mission protocol didn't.
She tried not to cringe. She failed.
Little did she know that this random C-rank would earn her a flee on sight order in the Kumo Bingo Book.
The mission was not a problem. She did not run into any missing-nin, as was the case when she and Neji went traveling together. She did not come across anyone who believed that she had an imaginary harem. She did not come across any disturbing "Hinata-matsuri" in her name, in which villagers would ceremonially...do strange things for good fortune.
Even the merchant she was escorting was okay, if a bit...talkative. He asked her completely normal questions, and while she was still well-aware that he was paying premium just to get one-on-one time with her, he really wasn't so bad.
Except for the constant stream of questions. So many questions.
"Hyuuga-san, do you think that the color grey looks good on me?"
"Hyuuga-san, do you think that pickles on cinnamon rolls is a good combo?"
"Hyuuga-san, do you think that hanakotoba lessons are really needed in the Ninja Academy?"
She did her best to answer this constant stream of questions. It was hard. As an introvert, her conversational energy drained further and further with each syllable he uttered, with each "Hyuuga-san" that gushed forth from his mouth, and she wanted nothing more than for him to finish his dango off so that she could drop him off at his village and leave.
Then finally, he asked her a question that actually had something to do with her fame, a question that unbeknownst to her, would once again tilt her whole world sideways.
"Hyuuga-san, is it true that your blood type is a secret?"
Hinata had learned her lesson from the last time she answered this question. She knew now that telling people that her blood type was a secret was the worst possible answer. So she played it normally.
"My blood type is A, Ken-san." She smiled politely, hoping that this answer would let her off the rumor mill.
She was wrong. So, so wrong. It was incredible just how this one innocuous answer would cause her to land on a Bingo Book.
A dark shadow crossed over to Hinata's table and her breath was knocked from her lungs when someone clapped her on the back.
"Your blood type is A, you don't say? Just like my brother's name, okay?"
Hinata whirled around in her seat. Her jaw dropped.
It was some...guy from Kumogakure, if his uniform and hitai-ate were any indication. A blonde, bearded, bespectacled man with the goofiest smile she had ever encountered.
"Um," she said intelligently, because what was she supposed to say in response to this odd man?
The strange man, whose brother's name was...A, apparently, gave her a huge thumbs-up.
"As for me, my blood type is B, same as my name, Killer B," he said in a terrible mix of what seemed to be enka and rap.
"Um," she said again. "It's nice to meet you...B...san?"
"The pleasure is all mine, didn't mean to take up your time," he rapped again. "I see that you're from the Leaf, don't want to give you any grief. We're on neutral ground now, don't wanna fight, if my bro finds out, I'll have to flee on sight."
"Erm, right."
"Oh hey, sight and right, those sound the same! Konoha ninja, looks like you're good game."
He beamed again and held out his fist.
She stared blankly for a moment, then gave him a fist bump, because what was she supposed to do in reponse to such a gesture?
Hinata was getting serious Naruto vibes from this man.
"Anyway, gotta go, places to see, people to show!"
He made a strange sign at Hinata with his index and pinky fingers and turned to leave the dango stand.
She stared after him.
That was weird.
In her fixation on the strange rapping man, she'd forgotten all about the merchant she was supposed to be escorting. A merchant who was, just like her deranged anti-Neji fan, not from Konoha.
No, Ken-san was from Lightning Country and knew all about the famous Killer B, the Hachibi jinchuuriki, much to Hinata's misfortune, and crucially, he was listening to every word Killer B rapped, including the part about fleeing on sight.
Poor Hinata.
A/N: Another idea from Icha Icha Ichiraku! :)
Stay tuned to see how the whole drama pans out!