All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the intellectual property to the respective author. The original characters and plot are the property of Stephenie Meyer (and the motion picture Savages). No copyright infringement is intended.
*All the mistakes are my own*
Chapter Forty-Two
"There is no real ending. It's just the place where you stop the story."
~ Frank Herbert
That quote has always stuck with me. I have it as the background on my phone. It seems fitting, right? My self-awareness keeps whispering that this chapter is the last one because, after today, there won't be much to tell, but that's not true. I'm just choosing to end it on a high note. The love story of a girl and her two boys is reaching the crescendo, and the sign is blinking: Intermission – get your drinks, use the restroom, and be back in time to watch the finale act.
When I first came to Laguna to live with Charlie, I didn't expect much. He was an absentee dad, a total stoner, and I planned on sleepwalking through my senior year. Sure, I would continue my klepto ways and maybe find someone to pass the time with, but Jasper came blazing in like a fireball and set my world on fire. All those plans to fade out of existence vanished. I felt something when he kissed me, and it was way better than stealing. It was love, but there was more, a need in me that I never knew, that had to be met.
I thought my heart was bursting, and it couldn't possibly hold another soul. Then Edward entered the room, ending the game. After that, all my thoughts got hazy. The ground spun beneath me. Stars above were out of their constellations.
Things were moving so fast and confusing but also made sense, somehow.
Every second I spend in Laguna Beach with my boys, the future becomes crystal clear.
I can see myself planting roots with Edward and Jasper as we buy a house, vacation together, and solidify this bond. When I surf at my favorite spot, watching parents teach their kids how to ride the waves, my heart swells with visions of Edward's baby girl and Jasper's lookalike son.
But I'm getting ahead of myself.
That's another story with many chapters.
The tale I'm telling you now ends with a wedding.
As I said, my men knew how to deliver. Jasper found a guy out in Mystic Hills. It was an area I've visited once or twice when Edward and I surfed at Main Beach. It's a chill neighborhood with cute tiny bungalow homes. I'm excited about the ceremony, even though our marriage will not be legal and kept a secret from family and friends.
As I think more about it, I realize that it'll mean nothing in the grand scheme of things. If one or all three decide to end the relationship, we can go separate ways, and no lawyer will be involved. No prenup will need to be signed, and everyone gets to keep their last names. Even in the church's eyes, if one partner cheats on the other, it's not adultery because no one is married.
Maybe that's why Edward and Jasper got on board without much fight.
All we do is stand before some stoner, who may or not be ordained, and vow to be faithful to each other forever. But there's no paperwork to be signed and submitted to the state. So no one will ever know unless we tell them.
As I pack the rest of my belongings and that white chiffon dress, I'm thinking of this and trying not to talk myself out of marrying my boys. I want this to happen but feel discouraged at the same time. What will it mean? Is our union legit if not inked into paper? What about God? What does he think? Do I even believe in Him?
"Shit," I whisper and rub my sweaty palms down the side of my jeans.
The nerves are finally getting to me.
Thankfully, I am in the room by myself, and the panic I'm feeling is going unnoticed. Edward and Jasper are busy packing up the Bronco and finishing last-minute tasks. This whole marriage was my idea, and I don't want them to see me having cold feet. Because these feelings don't represent what I want – these men vowed to be mine forever.
"Hey." Jasper comes up behind me and places his hands on my hips. "You ready? Alec needs us there by five."
I gulp back my anxiety and aim to be positive with an encouraging nod.
He takes my bag and throws it over his shoulder but doesn't move from my side. We stand there, for what seems like forever, but most likely only a few seconds, before I turn and face him. When I do, I shouldn't be surprised to see every thought and feeling of mine, Jasper's aware of and merely waiting on me to come clean. There's a gentle smile on his face. It's understanding and sympathetic.
"If you want to wait," he says.
"NO! Definitely not!" I shout at him. He chuckles. My face burns. "It's just last minute jitters."
"If you think this thing we're doing means nothing, you're wrong." He moves his hands to my face and gets real close. "We love you and this is forever, Bean."
"God," I whisper and put my lips to Jasper's. We kiss, and I know it will be okay.
"For such a young girl, you worry too much."
"You guys make me pretty serious."
"Unbelievable." Jasper's eyes cut above my head.
I turn around to see Edward coming up to the bedroom Arcadia door. He has a board tucked under his arm, and his bare chest is glistening with water. We watch as he does a quick rinse from the outside shower and dries off.
"I thought he was packing up the Bronco with you," I say.
"He was, but then disappeared on me. So I figured he was in here with you." Jasper pauses as Edward slides the door open and steps into the bedroom. "What's this, man? We need to be there at five and you have time to surf?"
"I'm going to go wash up," Edward says, barely acknowledging Jasper's rant, but he looks at me straight and playfully nudges me with his elbow. "You should join me."
As I follow, Jasper catches me by the back of the shirt and holds me in place. "Bean, we don't have that kind of time."
Edward laughs and closes the bathroom door behind him.
()()()
Alec, of Mystic Hills, used to be a computer tech in silicon valley, but when his older brother wanted to marry his boyfriend, Alec got online and became an ordained minister. When he saw the undulated joy it had brought to his brother and how he was a massive part of it, the high was something he had never felt before and was an instant addict. So that's all Alec does now. He performs weddings for people who can't legally or want a low-key affair. It's a profitable business, and occasionally, when he's so booked, the price of his assistance doubles.
But this is my boys we're talking about, and as the leaders of the Laguna tribe, they get VIP status. So it was merely luck on Jasper's part that he came across Alec. The guy wasn't advertising on the internet and got his clients by word of mouth, but when Alec called Jasper today about buying some weed, he mentioned how this groomzilla made him go through his stash quicker than usual.
So Jasper asked, "You work weddings now?"
"Work them? Man, I'm the one who marries these people," Alec said. "You didn't know I was an ordained minister?"
"No shit. Really? What kind of weddings do you perform?"
"All kinds, bro. Anything you got, I'll do."
"Do you have union ceremonies for folks who can't be married legally?"
By then, Alec's suspicious of Jasper's curiosity. "Yeah, of course. Who are you asking for?"
Jasper smiled. "Me."
And just like that, the ball started rolling, and now here we are, parked out front of a yellow cottage. Alec is waiting for us on the stoops of his porch. He's a man in his thirties with dark brown hair that he pulls back into a bun, and his bushy beard is a rustic copper. The board shorts and Hawaiian shirt he's wearing aren't something I expected our minister to wear, but it seems to fit. My relationship with Edward and Jasper isn't typical, and doing the abnormal seems normal for us.
"Hey-yo!" Alec says as he rushes to meet us. It's me, though, that has his full attention. "I take it you're the blushing bride."
"Hi, yeah. I'm Bella." I hold out my hand for him to shake, but Alec throws his arm around my shoulder and leads me up to the house.
"You have your dress?" he asks.
"It's um ... " I turn back to see Edward holding up my bag. "Yes, I do."
"Great! I have a room for you to change in, and then after that, I want to talk with you about how you want to walk down the aisle," Alec says, but he talks fast, and it's hard to keep up with him. So finally, I resort to nodding and agreeing with his plans. "Here, we are." Alec opens the door to the spare room with a flourish.
"Thanks," I say, but the decor stops me short. Everything is white: the carpet, the bedding, the walls, the drapery - it feels too sterile. The lack of color makes me uncomfortable. I feel out of place.
Alec notices the way I fidget. "Never mind, the room, Bella. This is only the canvas, but you, my dear, are the paint. You will bring the beauty to everything, right?"
I take another glance around and see the burst of purples, reds, pinks, and blues. It's only my imagination, but it helps me relax.
Alec grins. "Shall we get to work then?"
()()()
Since this ceremony was a spur of the moment and last minute, it wasn't as traditional as I'd imagined for my wedding. There were no bridesmaids or groomsmen. My parents weren't there to walk me down the aisle, but my future husbands were escorting me. I was in my white chiffon dress when Edward and Jasper came and got me. It was a halter top with an open back and came down to my mid-thigh. I bought it last year when I went to my high school homecoming with Alice. Don't get me wrong, it was flowy and the perfect dress to be married in, but not my first choice – it was my only choice. And my boys? They were even more casual than me. Neither of them owned a suit and ended up sporting their best, cleanest dressed shirt and cargo shorts. We all wore sandals. It was the only pair of shoes I wore for almost everything. I didn't have a bouquet, which Jasper felt terrible about and kept apologizing.
"Next time we get married," he said. "It's gonna be done right. That means fucking flowers, huge guest list, and cake."
"Okay," I said with a smile, but none of that stuff mattered to me.
The vows we say today will trump all parties.
Edward and Jasper hold out their arms for me to hook mine into them.
"You ready?" Jasper asks.
I take a deep breath and nod.
They pull me tight against them as we walk outside.
Alec set up his home to host weddings and created a whole magical garden in his backyard. A natural stone walkway leads through this path, surrounded by hedges. It curves around, past a marble water fountain, until we come to a massive arch of garden roses, wild grasses, and Italian Ruscus. And behind all that is a wall overtaken by English Ivy. Despite my nerves, I'm amazed by my recall and how well I can distinguish each plant.
Then again, botany is Jasper's passion, and Jasper is mine.
The song blaring from Alec's iPhone is Al Green's 'Let's Stay Together.' We fought a lot about what we all wanted because our taste in music differs. Jasper likes his reggae, I love my pop, and Edward listens to Drowning Pool. So you can see where this would be a problem. But, by the grace of God, Al Green's song was the only one my boys and I found that fit the bill.
Now, as we walk down the paved aisle, surrounded by flowers, and listening to that smooth voice, I feel an overwhelming emotion building in my chest. My eyes stay trained ahead – I don't dare look at my boys. If I catch one smile or glossy eyes, I will lose whatever composure I've managed to maintain.
Alec lets the song come to completion before addressing us. "We gather here today to rejoice in the strong bond you all share, and to honor your genuine commitment to each other's happiness."
I focus on a beautiful flower hanging above his head. It's the only thing that's keeping me from fainting.
"It is with great joy that we prepare to celebrate the union of Edward, Jasper, and Isabella before the Universe. Life offers few greater joys than a deep connection felt with another. But a soulmate is more than just a special connection. Author Elizabeth Gilbert reminds us: 'People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.'
May this ceremony serve to create unforgettable memories that you can cherish for the rest of your days."
Alec smiles at me, and I bravely look at him. Then, finally, he asks me with his eyes if it's okay for him to continue, and I nod.
"Edward, Jasper, and Isabella, you are preparing to embark on one of life's most rewarding journeys, the joys of which you do not yet fully comprehend. As you stand here today before the Universe, take a moment to appreciate the love and devotion you have for each other. This feeling – unmatched by any other in the world – is sought after by many, but only some truly find it.
You are lucky to share this bond; never take it for granted. While your union will become formalized with an exchange of rings, marriage is about much more than a piece of metal on your finger. Marriage, at its very essence, is a sacred promise. It's a vow that says, 'no matter what comes our way, we're in this together.' Life is known to throw unexpected obstacles in our path from time to time. Alone, they can feel challenging to tackle. But alone, you are no longer. Take comfort in the fact that you will have trusted partners by your side from this day forward. Whatever challenges may come, you will navigate them together. Conversely, whatever successes you attain, you will celebrate them together.
That is the beauty of true partnership. Upon entering this commitment, your lives will become eternally connected. Through joys and sorrows, triumphs and disappointments, your union will endure and become even stronger thanks to the bond you share. And remember to nurture this connection. By taking these vows today, you promise to dedicate yourself not just to your partner but to your partnership itself," Alec says and gestures towards us.
Just like we rehearsed ten minutes ago, Jasper, Edward, and I positioned ourselves into a triangle. We're facing each other straight on. I knew this moment was coming, and I've been trying to prepare myself. Edward keeps a calm, nonchalant facade, and Jasper's less chill. His eyes are red and glossy from him holding back his tears. The lump of emotion is swelling in my throat, and I'm trying as hard as I can not fall to pieces.
"Edward, Jasper, and Bella, please join hands," Alec directs. We do. My boys' hold is firm and comforting. "I'm told Edward and Jasper wrote their own vows."
"What?" I'm shaking my head. We agreed it was too short of a notice that we would only do the bare minimum.
My boys step in close to calm me.
"Listen, Bean," Jasper whispers, so only I can hear him. "Let us do this, okay?"
"But we agreed," I say.
"Yes, we know, but this is our gift to you," Edward says. He touches my cheek tenderly. "Please, let us do this."
I bite my lip and nod once. "Okay."
They step back and look over to Alec.
"Are we ready?" he asks.
"Yes," Jasper says, and as he straightens his back, he looks into my eyes. "Bean, I take you as my Wife and my companion. I promise to love you, to honor you, and to share my life with you. Even when physical distance separates us, you will never be far from my mind. I vow to cherish you exactly as you are, and never take what we have for granted. I offer you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward."
"Fuck," I whisper as a tear rolls down my cheek.
Everyone chuckles at my slip.
My face heats up with embarrassment. "Sorry."
"No, this is good," Alec says with encouragement. He looks over at Edward. "Are you ready?"
Edward digs into his pocket and pulls out his phone. It takes him a moment to pull up his word doc and find his place. I smile at him as he clears his throat and slowly reads every word. "Bean, I'm not good at expressing myself, and for a long time, I tried denying what I felt for you as something real. You were a complication to me. I saw you as trouble. Well, I was right. You've been nothing but trouble – but in a good way. You shake up our lives and make each day worth a damn. But, you know, I don't make promises that I can't keep, so here's one: I will protect you with every fiber, and I will never allow anyone to hurt you." He shoves his phone back into his pocket and then meets my gaze. "I love you."
"I love you," I whisper back.
"Isabella?" Alec draws my attention. "Do you have any vows or do you want to repeat after me?"
I brush the tears from my cheeks and quickly decide on the spot that I need to say something meaningful. "Yes, I have my vows." Edward and Jasper are surprised. They didn't expect me to rally, but I'll be damned to quote off some vows that aren't true to me. Taking a deep breath, I briefly close my eyes to gather my thoughts, but when I reopen them, I feel their love for me through the gentle smiles. "There's nothing I can say that hasn't already been said. I want to spend my life being your best friend and lover. I want to have kids with you. Every day, I wake up and can't believe that I've been blessed with not only one terrific guy but two. Jasper, you're the peace in my life. You always know how to center me. It was love for me from the first time you caught me in your doorway."
He chuckles at the memory and squeezes my hand.
"And Edward," I say, and he snaps his head up. "You're my rock. You've been with me nearly every day since we've met. You weren't easy to crack. I fought hard to earn my place in your heart. Now, I can see there was no fight. I was yours from the beginning."
Edward swallows thickly but never looks away. He maintains that connection with me. It's powerful and almost derails me.
But I shake it off and smile. "And so, here's my promise to both of you: I will love and honor you as my husbands, I will laugh with you as my best friends, and I will make you always feel wanted by me as your lover. You two are my life. I love you."
Everything falls silent around us, and no one says a word.
My heart pounds painfully against my chest as the seconds keep ticking.
Finally, Alec clears his throat, and Edward and Jasper snap out of their trance.
"Holy shit," Edward says under his breath.
Jasper narrows his eyes in disbelief. "Did you just come up with that on the fly?"
I shrug. "Yeah. Was it okay?"
Both my guys nod, their faces almost as readable as their thoughts.
"All right then," Alec says, getting us all back on track. "Edward, under the eyes of the Universe, do you take Isabella and Jasper to be your lawfully wedded Wife and Husband? Do you vow to offer unconditional love and support to them as long as you shall live?"
Without missing a beat, Edward gives a firm, resolute: "I do."
"Jasper, under the eyes of the Universe, do you take Isabella and Edward to be your lawfully wedded Wife and Husband? Do you vow to offer unconditional love and support to them as long as you shall live?"
"I do," Jasper says, and he grins at me as if the whole world has been lifted off his shoulders.
Alec turns to me now. "Isabella, do you take Jasper and Edward to be your lawfully wedded Husbands? Do you vow to offer unconditional love and support to them as long as you shall live?"
My voice trembles as a tear slips and rolls down my cheek. "I do."
"By the power vested in me by the Universal Life Church and by the state of California, I happily pronounce Edward, Jasper, and Isabella to be Husbands and Wife! You may seal this union with a kiss," Alec boasts grandly.
Edward and Jasper pull me into them, and we kiss. It's soft and tender, not rushed or vulgar, but perfect. The world seems to fall away in that second. I don't see beyond my boys. Alec disappears, and all I can hear is Al Green's voice: I'm so in love with you.
Over and over, that one phrase replays in my thoughts. I can't even describe how happy I am at this moment. The feeling of this love overwhelms me from the top of my head to the tip of my toes.
Pure bliss and nothing can get in the way - except a loud blaring beep, beep, beep.
Reluctantly, my boys and I part from each other's lips.
Jasper pulls out his phone and turns off the alarm. "Time to go."
Alec holds up his hand. "Wait, before you leave, you need this." He turns around and grabs a piece of paper. We're not sure of what it is until Alec holds it up for us to see. It's a thick 11 x 8 Ivory paper with gold trim and says boldly at the top of the sheet: Certificate of Marriage. Everything is there, our names, the date and time of our union, and the signature of the witness. Alec and Layla - his cat. "Now, obviously, this isn't legal, but you should have something tangible to symbolize the promises you made to each other today."
"Thank you, man," Jasper says as he takes our certificate, immediately handing it over to me and shaking Alec's hand. "We appreciate everything you've done."
"It means the world to us," I say, and, despite his 'no hugs' rule written on the flyer he gave to us, I throw my arms around him. "Thank you."
Alec laughs at my exuberance and pats my back. "You just keep being the work of art in your men's life."
The alarm on Jasper's phone goes off again. "Now, we seriously have to go," he warns, and we quickly grab our things and say goodbye.
()()()
We're in the Bronco heading for the airport and it's been less than twenty minutes after saying, 'I do.' It's crunch time, and Jasper complains we're running late but never goes above the speed limit. I'm on cloud nine. In fact, I don't care if we ever make it to Cambodia. If it were up to me, my boys and I would be heading home to smoke a bowl, eat great food, and consummate this union.
We're married, I think to myself. They're my husbands, and I am their Wife.
But then I glance down at my hands and feel as though one more thing is missing.
"What's wrong?" Jasper asks.
I look at him, surprised. "What?"
"That sigh you did just now," he says. "Are you okay?"
It amazes me how quick he tunes into my moods. "I'm fine. It was just a sigh."
"Bullshit, Bean."
Now Edward joins the fold as he leans in from the backseat. "What's going on?"
I want to lie because telling them that I want more after everything they've done just makes me sound unappreciative and greedy. The problem is, I'm a terrible liar, and they most likely already know what I'm about to say. There's no point. So, truth, let's go. "I know we had discussed getting rings once we got back from Cambodia, but I just looked down and it feels naked. I wished we would've got them before we left, that's all. Sorry." I sag in my seat as shame flushes my cheeks. "Forget I said anything."
Jasper glances back at Edward. "What do you think?"
"Now is good," Edward says.
Jasper turns on his blinker and pulls off to the side of the road.
I'm confused, but not stupid. It doesn't take me long to realize that my husbands have been busy.
"No shit? Really?" I say, unable to suppress my grin.
Edward groans as he digs through his backpack and pulls out three boxes. "We wanted to wait until we got to Cambodia to surprise you with these, but you refused to be surprised."
I'm wiggling in the front seat with excitement as I hold out my left hand. "No, sir, I hate em'. I am not even sorry."
Jasper does a drum roll on the steering wheel as Edward opens the top of one. There, beautifully nestled on the black velvet, is a unique silicone band. The coloring on the ring is a mix of warm copper and shimmery turquoise, mimicking metal with an aged finish. The first thing I think of is Edward's hair and Jasper's eyes. It's too perfect in so many ways.
My hands fly to my mouth. "Oh, my God, it's beautiful."
"Who do you want to do the honors?" Jasper asks.
The question throws me off. "Why can't you both slip it on me?"
"Hmm," Jasper and Edward say together and then have a silent conversation. It doesn't take them long to come to a decision.
Bean gets what Bean wants.
"I'll go first," Edward says as he takes the ring out of the case and slides it only partly up my finger.
Jasper jumps in and finishes it the remainder of the way. He leans down and kisses it.
The fit is snug but feels right.
"And now yours," I say.
Edward opens the boxes with his and Jasper's rings. They're the same design as mine. I don't hesitate to remove them and slip them on my boys' fingers. Even though we're in Jasper's Bronco on the side of the highway, with cars zooming past us, this feels intimate to me. Like always, it's just us three, and this moment isn't about anyone else. Our connection, just like our rings, continues to be unique and not meant to be known or seen by others because they'll never understand. This unconventional love will be balked at and criticized as people will continue to think I'm a slut. Even friends and family will make bets on how long we'll last. How can three people love each other equally? They'll ask.
I used to get mad, but maturity will change how you see things.
Of course, three people can be in a relationship, but they were right about one thing: equal love doesn't exist. I don't love Jasper and Edward the same way. They don't love me the way they love each other. And that's okay. Love isn't meant to be repeatable and is sure as hell isn't designed to have conditions. We made a promise that no matter what happens, we're going to work at this every day.
Who knows if it'll last.
It might end tomorrow or ten years from now or never.
Life has no guarantees.
What I do know is that today, I will love these boys hard and as truthfully as I can.
They vowed to do the same for me.
How's that for a place to stop the story?
AN: Ugh, complete cheese, but I'm feeling sentimental. It was brought to my attention that this chapter is perfect and just in time for Valentines Day. So win? The Epi is next, then SoCal will be completed.
Deep breath. We are almost there. See you soon.