Chapter Thirty Four
Jasper
It warmed my heart to see Bella excitedly chatting about our wedding to Charlotte although Peter and I tended to find ourselves something to do away from the house.
"It's women's work, organizing weddings. They don't want us interrupting them."
"Thank you for those words of wisdom, Peter. I didn't know you were such an expert on weddings."
"Don't use that tone of voice with me, Major. I'm just trying to keep you out of trouble. When women get together and start talking in that tone of voice the best thing you can do is to keep your head down or trust me, you'll find yourself roped in to shop for lace or discuss fucking flowers. I know, I've been to enough weddings. I mean, look at yours!"
I rolled my eyes, it was true Peter had made the mistake of asking Alice why we needed an Italian designer to make her dress when there were plenty a lot cheaper and just as good in this country. Well, he didn't put it quite like that but Alice got the gist and was not happy!
"So, what you actually mean is that you put your foot in it once and got your balls ripped off."
"Hey, my balls are exactly where they're supposed to be. How was I to know that harridan was a real bitch. I still don't know what you saw in her."
"Don't go down that track, Peter. Let's focus on the here and now. Charlotte has given us a list of things to do so why don't we get started?"
Peter pulled the now crumpled list from his pocket and stared at it, "Half of this stuff isn't necessary. I mean, why would I want to paint the barn? It looks perfectly OK to me."
I stared over his shoulder at the building in question, "Peter, before we even think about painting the damn barn we need to replace the doors."
He turned around and regarded said doors, "Why?"
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because they're hanging off!"
"So? Are you getting married in my barn?"
"No."
"My point exactly!"
"I think Charlotte wants the place to look nice for the guests."
As soon as I said it I wished I hadn't. His face darkened.
"Oh right. My place isn't good enough for the fucking Cullen clan. Oh no. It's got to be shiny and beautiful. It's a fucking working ranch. If they don't like it then I suggest they stay the fuck away."
"I know that. It's just Charlotte is house proud. She wants things to look nice."
"Then let her mend the fucking doors and paint the barn. Now, what else is on this fucking list?"
I knew at this point it was useless to argue with Peter. I'd just wait until he wandered off still cussing and start the work myself, Hopefully, he would come round when he cooled down.
It was great in theory, but unfortunately, Charlotte appeared a few minutes later while Peter was kicking the corral fence to demonstrate that it was not falling apart. To make things even worse his second demonstration kick resulted in the middle rail flying across the meadow and almost decapitating a startled rabbit that was innocently munching on the grass!
"Peter! What are you doing? You're supposed to be fixing the place up, not destroying it."
He wheeled around looking thunderous, "Tell you what, why don't you tell Bella to rent herself the fucking St Julien if she wants glamor."
"Whoa there, Peter. Don't drag Bella into this."
He whirled around ready to give me both barrels when Bella herself appeared.
"Is there something wrong? I heard my name. Peter, what's up?"
"What's up? Well for starters this isn't a fucking five-star hotel."
Bella, taken aback, frowned, "I know that, Peter. I love the ranch."
He studied her looking bewildered now.
"Well in that case why am I holding a to-do list that's longer than my fucking dick?"
Bella grinned, "I'm not sure how long that is but I'm assuming you have a problem with said list. Can I see it, please? The list," she added the last hurriedly as Peter began unzipping his pants. He really was in a provocative mood. I just hoped Bella was up to dealing with an irate Peter. No one else could, not even Charlotte once his dander was fully up.
He thrust the list at her and she took it thanking him very sweetly then began to read the items silently.
Looking up when she reached the end she spoke again, "I didn't write this. I've never even seen it before."
He stared at her suspiciously, "You haven't?"
"No."
She looked around at the barn, "I guess it could do with a little TLC but don't do it on my account."
He grunted, "And the fences?"
"Well, I guess you need to fix the one you just broke or the horses will be joining us for dinner."
"Yeah, yeah. I meant the others."
"It's a working ranch. I wouldn't expect it to be perfect, but…"
"But?" his voice was dangerously low again.
"It's none of my business really, but poor Charlotte has to look at the things close to the house more than you. I guess she thought the wedding might be a golden opportunity to motivate your lazy butt."
Charlotte and I exchanged worried glances, this could go south really quickly and I tensed ready to intervene if necessary.
Peter stared at her in silence for a minute then began to smile, "Lazy butt? Really?"
Bella giggled, nodding her head, "I feel sorry for poor Charlotte. She has a lot to put up with. I would have thought you'd want to show the Cullens how wrong you think they feel about you."
"What do you mean by that?"
"I mean that it's clear you have an inferiority complex, Peter Whitlock."
"A what? Why can't you speak plain English, girl?"
"See what I mean? You understood what I said just fine. You just like to play the foul-mouthed ignorant country boy. Well, it won't wash with me, Mister. So, I suggest you get off your lazy fat ass and get this place tidied up pronto. I refuse to have my wedding ruined by poor maintenance. You have help, so use it."
I was struggling not to laugh when I saw that Peter was stunned. He didn't know how to respond to Bella. She had him beat.
"Well, if that's all that's bothering you why didn't you fucking say so? Jeez, women! Come on Major before she starts kicking butts."
At that point both Charlotte and I burst out laughing, Bella and Peter were a match made in heaven. They were going to be firm friends and I was relieved. Now, all we had to do was to get through the visit of Esme and Rose without any blood being spilt.
Bella
I wasn't sure what to do when I heard Peter and Jasper arguing but I didn't want to be responsible for trouble between them. I'd seen the list Charlotte gave to Peter and she'd explained her motive so I decided to hell with it. Peter and I would either come out of this as friends or I'd be leaving the ranch fast!
Everything went well and I saw Jasper relax so I knew Peter and I were OK. Now, if he could just hold his tongue while Esme and Rose were here the wedding would be a piece of cake. I never thought getting married could entail so much diplomatic manoeuvring or I would have said to hell with it and eloped!
I was looking forward to seeing my friends again and I knew that Charlotte would get along with them. As far as she was concerned, making our day perfect was all that mattered.
Jasper took Peter into Boulder to do some shopping to avoid the arrivals although he refused to divulge what he was going to buy. I wondered if it was merely an excuse but either way it enabled us to greet the visitors without worrying about Peter's Pottymouth!
Esme came over and hugged me warmly before treating Charlotte the same and I realized that of course they already knew each other. They'd met at Alice's wedding. Now that must have been an entertaining day from the little I'd heard about it since arriving here.
"Bella, we've missed you. You're looking so much better sweetheart. It must be the country air and the company. I can't wait to see the design for your you going to have any bridesmaids or flower girls? Who is going to give you away? What about your mother? Have you spoken to her?"
Esme was firing questions at me so fast my head began to spin until Rose intervened.
"Esme, take a breath. How is Bella supposed to answer any questions when you haven't stopped asking them yet?"
"Sorry, Bella. It's just so wonderful to be welcoming you into the family officially. I'm sure you feel the same way Charlotte. How's Peter? Is he here?"
She looked around nervously.
"No. you're safe for a few hours. It's just us girls. Come on in."
Once inside, Esme and Rose filled us in on all the news.
"Mr Jenks sent the information we recovered to the IRS and they turned up at the King compound and the office in town. Everyone is talking about it although there are no details out so far. People love to gossip and we've heard some fantastic tales. The Kings are drug barons, they run an assassin for hire business, they've been ripping off clients for years and funding a secret getaway. It's all ridiculous of course. I'm waiting till the police turn up at Sophia's apartment again. That will give them some more to talk about."
I frowned, "Sophia?"
Rose jumped in at this point and explained who Sophia was and what Magda and Sasha had done there.
"Wow! I'm surprised Sasha got involved. That could be dangerous."
"Yes, which is why Carlisle sent them home but I promised to make sure they got an invitation to the wedding. Sasha is very fond of you, Bella. It would break her heart to miss your big day."
"Really? And how does Edward feel about that?"
Rose grinned, "Edward has his hands full with that one. I don't think it matters how he feels about it. As for Emmett, he's going around like he won the lottery. He's becoming unbearable. I think he wants a badge saying Number One Hacker of the World. I wouldn't mind but Alice gave him most of the information."
"Alice?" I was shocked. Alice had helped? Maybe things wouldn't be so awkward between us after all.
"I guess I should thank her."
Rose glanced at Esme before answering, "I think she's hoping for an invitation to the wedding actually, Bella. If that won't be too weird for you."
I hesitated, Alice and I had been close at one time. At the same time that she had been married to the man I was about to wed.
"I guess if it's not too weird for her it shouldn't be for me. I'll mention it to Jasper."
"Oh yes. By the way, Edward spoke to Patrick just to make sure that he hadn't been involved in any way. He wasn't."
"I knew he wouldn't have done anything like that, but thanks for making sure. Do you think he'll go down with his father?"
"I don't know. Nothing we found leads directly to him and if he can prove he had no knowledge of the Swiss bank account or the accounts in Sophia's apartment then he might get away with it."
"I hope so. I don't hate him and he's not responsible for his father's actions."
"True," Esme sounded a little hesitant, "But Edward said he did suspect his father might be involved. So, he did know that his father may have been involved in some shady business."
I left it at that. We had more interesting things to discuss.
The day went by pleasantly enough and while Peter was away Charlotte relaxed. It couldn't be easy married to a ticking time bomb liable to explode at any second around people he wasn't sure of.
We were sitting on the porch laughing and chatting when the guys arrived home and while Jasper came straight over to say hi to Esme and Rose, Peter took his time, parking the truck in the barn and then taking some mysterious packages into the house.
When he finally joined us it was Esme who spoke first.
"Peter, it's been a long time. It's good to see you. Thank you for looking after Bella so well. She's looking much better now."
"Yeah well… It's not like we're fucking savages. We do know how to treat guests so long as they treat us right. So, have you four witches finished stirring the pot?"
Charlotte frowned, looking resigned to trouble looming, but Rose only laughed, "Yep, we conjured up a dress, some music, and all the other boring details you guys always forget about so we've taken off our pointy hats and put away our wands. You should be safe for a while."
Peter nodded grudgingly, he liked it when people took up his challenge and served some of his own attitude back at him. It broke the ice and we had a wonderful evening with Rose suggesting a game of horseshoes. I was useless as the only human playing but I enjoyed all the cheating that went on. Peter was almost as competitive and devious as Emmett. I was proud of Jasper who eventually beat Peter although the outcome was hotly contested and would be for a long time to come.
If this atmosphere could be recreated for our wedding it would be a day to remember!
"You're looking tired, Bella. Rose and I are going hunting if Charlotte could point us in the best direction but we'll see you in the morning."
I was grateful, I was tired but I always felt embarrassed when I had to slip away to bed. Almost like a child who desperately wanted to stay up with the adults although its eyes were shutting of their own accord.