Chapter 4
Regina
This time Emma really did wake up, she was still in the stained-glass room with silvery moonlight filtering through and she was still holding the hand of the sleeping woman who she was looking at in wonder as she tried to wrap her head around everything that she had just witnessed.
Had she really just been inside the woman's memories? But how could that be? And how was it possible that her mother had grown from a young child into a woman while this sleeping woman looked exactly the same as she had when she had saved young Snows life all those years ago, she had looked no older than Emma as she had pulled Snow onto her horse and she looked no older than Emma now as she slept peacefully on the marble slab, could what Emma had just seen been real?
The sleeping woman remained resolutely silent as Emma pondered her thoughts she realised that if she really had experienced the woman's memories then it had probably taken a great deal of the limited magic that was available to the woman to share that with her which meant that she was unlikely to be able to talk to her for a while which left Emma with only one feasible option, she needed to talk to her mother.
She decided to broach the subject at dinner that day, watching her mother carefully as she spoke, Snow was well known for recounting many stories of her childhood years but she had never mentioned that one or anyone named Regina before and it definitely seemed like the kind of story that she would retell had it really happened so if it turned out to be true and Snow had chosen not to re tell that story or mention Regina then Emma wasn't sure how she was going to react when she was asked about her but she knew that she didn't want to miss a thing.
"So, I heard a new story about you today" Emma ventured mulling over her words carefully
"Oh, you did, did you" Snow replied laughing lightly "and what was that"
"It was about the time a woman rescued you from bolting horse, Regina I think her name was, you were only a kid at the time" Emma said with a casual shrug never taking her eyes off Snow.
She watched her mother flinch, and eyes so like her own rose to meet hers wide with surprise,
"Who told you about that?" she demanded "Who told you about Regina"
"No one in particular" Emma shrugged "it was just something I overheard in passing when I was out earlier" she lied forcing her face to remain impassive as thoughts exploded in her mind,
Snow narrowed her eyes suspiciously, but she didn't press any further, she suspected that having seen her reaction Emma had wanted to protect her source from the repercussions of their gossip and Snow admired that trait in her daughter it was one that they certainly didn't always share.
"I don't like to talk about Regina much or at all really" Snow sighed, "but yes she did rescue me from that horse when I was a girl and then she met my father and a truly wonderful thing happened" Snow continued eyes wide and starry, "He arrived to collect me from Regina's home in a terrible state of worry we lost my mother only a few months prior you see, everything was so raw and the thought of losing me to was almost too much for Daddy to bear. Once he was happy that I was okay he insisted on meeting the woman that had saved my life, Cora, Regina's mother summoned Regina to the room so that he could bestow his gratitude on her and that was when it happened" Snow concluded a dreamy far-off look in her eyes,
"Then was when what happened?" Emma pressed confused
"They fell in love" Regina breathed "It was like a miracle, Daddy never believed it would happen again after mother, but it did, he proposed a few days later, Regina was going to be your grandfather's new wife and my new stepmother" Snow smiled,
Emma quickly did the math in her head, silently grateful for her parent's insistence that she should learn numbers, the struggle had been real until something clicked and suddenly numbers made sense to Emma, she blanched as she came to her horrifying conclusion
"But she was young enough the be your sister" Emma exclaimed before she could stop herself "well that's what I heard anyway" she added sheepishly as Snow shot her a glare,
"Yes well I'm sure that some people disapproved back then, but they were in love and that was all that mattered to them, Regina even had the option to leave with the young man that she had been involved with prior to meeting my father with her mothers blessing no less but she chose to stay with my father, It was just as well really because the young man died suddenly a week before the wedding, some say that it was from a broken heart, but I think that he was probably just sick, terrible tragedy"
"So, what happened to Regina?" Emma asked "I can't remember ever meeting her"
"that's because you didn't" Snow replied face clouding "Her chambers were in the sealed wing three huge storms hit during the week leading up to the wedding, each as unexpected as the one before It and each causing more damage that the last, when the third storm hit Regina's wing was completely obliterated, her body was never found but no one could have survived that destruction and Regina was never seen again" she swallowed and smiled at Emma eyes a little too bright "anyway" she said "that was a long time ago, it's nothing that you have to worry about"
"mmm hmm" Emma popped a forkful of food into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully, nearly everything that Snow had told her seemed to contradict with Regina's memories, the rescue was the same, but Emma had seen how Regina's face had lit up when It was time to go for her riding lesson, witnessed the love in Regina eyes as she had gazed at Daniel that caused a pang of something like jealousy in Emma's own heart, heard the care free laughter they had shared as they rode together heading for their special spot to be alone together, could that have really all disappeared just few short hours later when Regina had laid eyes on the king, who by Emma's calculations would already have been an old man and a stranger to Regina no less, Emma was doubtful.
Then there was the hidden wing, not damaged by storms and left to ruins at all but perfectly intact behind that wall and hidden within its depths very much alive a sleeping Regina who didn't appeared to have aged a day since she rescued young Snow from the runaway horse. No things weren't adding up at all Emma thought as she sat and silently chewed through the food in front of her.
"What happened to you" Emma murmured to Regina as she gently stroked her hair late that night, then taking Regina's hand as she had the previous night Emma settled back into her chair making herself comfortable and closed her eyes waiting for sleep to claim her.
It happened the same way as before only Emma now knew that she wasn't really awake and neither was Regina as she watched the woman's past self-hurrying into the room that her mother had summoned her to where she greeted the waiting king with a curtsey,
"How can I be of service your majesty" Regina asked politely placing a kiss upon the hand that the king held out her,
"I have come with a proposition" the king replied, "I have been looking for a new mother for my sweet little Snow for some time now and you my dear have proven yourself worthy of the honour, what do you say will you be my Queen?" he asked
Regina's jaw slackened and her dropped open as she froze on the spot unable to speak a look of horror etched into her features, it didn't matter however because Regina's mother Cora quickly shuffled in front of her daughter blocking her from view and taking his hand from Regina offering him a curtsy and a respectful peck on his hand just as Regina had before her,
"Of course, she will your Majesty" Cora replied on Regina's behalf, "Forgive my daughter she's just a little overwhelmed" she said smiling sickeningly as the king nodded his approval of her words.
"That's not love" Emma tried to yell feeling sorry for Regina who now hidden behind her mother had silent tears rolling down her face "They didn't even give her a choice"
The memory gave way to another this time she found herself in the familiar surroundings of Regina's chambers in the castle, Regina was standing on a small stool arms stretched out at her side wearing the flowing white gown that now sat abandoned on the mannequin, maids surrounded her, nipping and tucking it here and there adding more and more intricate details to the gown, she would have looked beautiful and radiant if not for the haunting look on her face and the tears that fell faster than the maid standing in front her with a delicate hanky in her hand could mop them up,
"There, there" the maid murmured patting Regina's arm, "It's perfectly normal to be emotional before your wedding day" she smiled reassuringly but Regina continued stand dutifully still, silently staring straight through the maid as though she wasn't there tears still streaming down her cheeks.
Emma woke up Regina's haunted look still etched beneath her eyelids
"Oh, Regina I'm so sorry" she choked out tears running down her own cheeks as she gently squeezed the hand that she was holding,
The next day Emma still couldn't get the haunted look in Regina's eyes out of her mind and by the time she was padding back towards the sleeping woman later that night she had decided that tonight instead of trying to see more of Regina's memories she would do something for Regina and create some new memories for her.
As Regina lay silently sleeping Emma placed a thick candle laced with lavender in a tall iron holder one of a pair that she had found next to the fire place in the small sitting room, and placed it not too far from Regina's resting place, then she sat in her chair and opened a book that she had chosen with care from the library on the other side of this room, opened it and began to read aloud, she read until she started to fall asleep then placing a bookmark between its pages to mark her place she closed the book, wished Regina good night and headed back to her own bed where she slept a dreamless sleep,
The next five nights passed in a similar fashion Emma reading but not trying to see any more memories then on the sixth night just as she was coming to the end of the book Emma fell asleep holding Regina's hand.
She was in the castle stables Emma recognised them at once and there was Regina getting ready to run away with Daniel, Emma could feel the excitement mixed with anxiety in the air, the two were turning to leave together when Cora appeared in a cloud of smoke blocking their way, she weaved her way towards the couple guiding Daniel away from Regina like a snake hunting its prey, Emma wanted to shout a warning but as usual she was spectator with no power to stop anything that was about to unfold.
Cora had her arm around Daniel giving him her blessing to be with her daughter, Emma longed to believe that the woman was telling the truth but the sleeping woman on the slab in her castle told her otherwise, but the Regina in this time was looking at her mother, eyes filled with wonder, hope and love, she had dared to believe and that would be her undoing.
Emma longed to be able to close her eyes so that she wouldn't have to witness the next event but just like Regina who's features had rapidly rearranged themselves into a look of horror she couldn't tear her eyes away, her own tears flowed as Regina's did and she felt the other woman's despair as Cora suddenly plunged her hand into the stable boys chest and pulled it back out with his glowing and beating in her palm.
Regina's pleas fell on deaf ears as Cora squeezed the heart into dust sprinkling it onto the straw at her feet as Daniel dropped down dead, devastatingly it turned out that a broken heart being Daniels's cause of death had been far closer to the truth than Snow could ever have imagined.
Emma's heart ached as she watched Regina drop to her knees sobbing and desperately trying to pick up the dust at her mother's feet crying out why over and over again as it ran through her fingers,
"Because" Cora replied coldly "You were born to be a queen Regina not the wench of a stable boy" then she turned and left a hysterical Regina pulling her love into her arms and sobbing into his empty chest.
Though she knew it wouldn't make any difference Emma couldn't stop her silent feet from crossing the room, her hollow body from lowering itself to ground or her weightless arms from reaching out and wrapping themselves around Regina who of course felt nothing of her presence as she looked up through the open stable window tears still streaming and saw a tiny miracle shooting across the sky,
"I wish that Daniel was still alive" she said squeezing her eyes closed to wish upon the star, but nothing happened because death is final and irreversible, Regina tried again "I wish that I had the power to stop my mother" she said, and this time Emma saw something stir a purple glow under Regina's palms.
In the next memory they were back in Regina's chamber a storm was raging outside and Regina stood on her balcony letting the rain soak her to the skin, her hair was plastered back and purple lightening like charges crackled around her fingers as she howled into the storm unheard by anyone other than Emma.
Emma followed hurrying to keep up with Regina's quick strides as she turned and walked in through the huge glass doors, they passed the wedding dress hanging on its mannequin exactly how it still did and headed out into the hall Regina was already dry by the time she had passed through the door of her sleeping chambers and out into the hall and it was with a sense of foreboding that Emma noticed that Regina was wearing the exact dress that she currently slept in.
Power emanating from her very core Regina entered the library selected the book that Emma had found on the table opened to the page that had been bookmarked and recited the strange poetry as she snapped the book shut the ground shook underfoot and a sound like the castle cracking in two echoed through the wing, for split second Emma saw Regina's wing in ruins in that second she knew why nobody had believed that Regina could have survived this destruction and why they hadn't felt able to search until they found her body this is what everybody but Emma would see when they looked at this wing, Emma and Emma realised a fuzzy memory came to the forefront of her memory of the first time that she had been found sleeping by the wall the Blue fairy, Emma was finally able to decipherer that look on Blues face when she had looked at the wall then back at Emma, Blue put up the wall for the king sealed the wing like a tomb but unlike everyone else Blue had been able to see the truth all along so why had she never said anything?
As quickly as Emma saw the ruins the room was back to normal again and Regina was heading for the lounge pouring amber liquid from the decanter into a crystal glass which she carried to the fireplace, Emma watched with renewed helpless horror as Regina extracted a vial from the box above the fireplace popped off its lid and emptied its contents into her drink swishing it around until the amber liquid turned acid green,
"I'll never again know real love in this life" Regina sobbed
"I love you" Emma whispered from her spot hovering like a ghost in a past that wasn't her own,
"Please don't Regina" Emma pleaded hopelessly trying and failing to knock the drink away as Regina emptied it into her mouth in one swig leaving the empty glass on the table before staggering towards the library ignoring the calls of her name as staff made it to the source of the noise and frantically tried to ascertain if she was still alive in amongst the rubble that they could see just as easily as she ignored the words that she couldn't hear coming from Emma.
Emma followed as Regina potion taking affect staggered into the secret room sealed the bookcase behind her and lay out on the slab her head finding the pillows as her final words escaped her lips before timeless sleep claimed her,
"I'd rather be dead than be his queen" she whispered then her eyes dropped closed, and she became motionless,
"Please no!" Emma pleaded hysterically tears streaming down her eyes and she reached out to shake Regina "I love you" she said again leaning in to plant a gentle kiss on Regina's lips eyes flying open when she felt the lips below hers responding.
Regina was awake her eyes were open, and she was kissing Emma back, alarmed Emma stumbled back,
"What happened?" she asked looking around and realising that sun was rising over peaceful grounds no voices were calling Regina's name and there were no traces of the storm that was blowing seconds earlier "Am I awake?" she asked in wonder
"You are" Regina smiled swinging her legs around to stand up, walking towards Emma she took her hands in her own with a smile on her face that turned Emma's legs to jelly "Thank-you for waking me Emma" she said
"I did?" Emma asked confused "but how"
"True loves kiss" Regina's smile grew broader still,
"But I tried that before and it didn't work" Emma confessed
"Because it wasn't time yet" Regina explained "you truly fell in love with me as you learned my story and I fell in love with you in return" she explained as she led Emma from one room to the next each one returning to its former vibrant dust free glory as they passed through them until they reached the bed chamber and paused in front of the wedding dress now looking as new as it had the day, she fell asleep,
"We had to go through the journey before we could come to its end" she said opening her hand to reveal a ball of fire dancing in its palm, throwing it at the dress before turning back to face Emma,
"That journeys end is our Journeys beginning" she whispered leaning in to claim Emma's lips with her own and Emma gave herself over to the kiss entirely, melting into Regina arms, tears of sorrow gave way to tears of joy as the familiar warmth of Regina's hug washed over her, the glow of the flames licking merrily at the dress reflected off their skin until Regina squeezed her fist and both the dress, and the fire disappeared.
"I love you Emma" Regina whispered breathlessly when they finally parted.