"Alright? There!" Beatrice hop-stepped away, her blanket of golden curls flouncing about. "What do you think? Is it not the cutest and most stylish Subaru has ever been, I suppose?"
I look "dumb and dumber" more so than "cute and stylish." Subaru lifted his stump, his pajama sleeve cut short and tied snug with a pink, frilly ribbon. Being part of the Great Spirit's body meant she was to be drill-less until Subaru's person stopped making use of her ribbon. His maiming was "unsightly, I suppose" without it, but Subaru still felt bad about cramping Beatrice's style.
"Will your hair get in the way?" he fretted. "I think Emilia has a scrunchie in one of the drawers." Half of this was an excuse to see the elusive "ponytail Beako."
Beatrice waved her finger. "Ah, but you see, Subaru, this was but another tactical move on Betty's part, in fact! For Emily will be in a good mood from the outset if she sees me like this, signaling the desire for a brushing." Beatrice cradled her plump, red cheeks, humming at the thought of quality time with their mutual favorite woman. "Hmm, yes, this will be most beneficial for Emily, I suppose~"
Subaru could see the logic—and the easy tease. "So, you just want Emilia to brush your hair, is that it?"
He laughed as her tiny fists struck him in the chest. And he kept on laughing, hugging Beatrice one last time as he saw her shattering before his very eyes.
The laughter continued in his head; the fun times with Beatrice and the others this loop. For Subaru feared what would become of him if it stopped, and he was only left with horror in mind.
Subaru was on his way to Daphne's holding room when a shirtless Garf and his sharp grin filled a passing doorway, waving. "Hey, yo, Boss!"
"Garf, my man. What's up?" It was easy to smile at him like this, jovial at the outset—a notion Subaru didn't have a second to dwell on:
"Nothin', we was wonderin' if you wanted to chill with Sis n' I, s'all." Garf stepped aside, revealing a knelt Frederica, gowned in her nightie. The same spring-green one from before. When the Witches had slaughtered them all. Before she'd shed it to slaughter Daphne, and then Emilia and Subaru. "Boss?" Frederica was left all alone at their mercy. "Boss!" If these worlds left behind continued…
Was Frederica making this same, scared look at Sekhmet moments after he'd left her alone? "Y-you're Grace," she gasped, "are you okay?!"
"Huh?" A warmth tickled Subaru's cheek. Wiping returned his fingertips damp. Shit, seriously?! "I—! I…" Was he seriously about to lie out of habit? "I just had a really sad thought about you, Frederica."
"Ehh?" purred Garfiel. "I thought somethin' was up between you n' her."
"Nothing at all is 'up' between the king and I, Little Brother."
"Naw, but m'sure somethin' did happen, once." Garf rounded into Subaru's face, forehead-first and grinning. "So, wha's wrong with Sis , eh?"
"Is that what you're after?" Subaru butted back. "Nothing— ugh! " He was headbutted in kind.
"You afraid o' her all'a sudden n' fer no reason." Garf grinned daringly. "Less have ourselves a friendly chat, emphasis on the 'friend.'"
"You make it sound like a threat, Garf." Subaru tried his best not to sound genuinely threatened, and hurt the guy's RBD-contextualized feelings.
Garfiel straightened up, hands on his hips. "Well, all things considered, it kinda is. Don't mean it to be that way, but s'just how corpseater splatter, y'know what I mean?" Subaru nodded, assuming "corpseaters" had no choice but to splat at some point—such is life. "After all," said Garf, "we can't kill the Bitches o' Sin without clear heads, eh?" He belly-laughed, moving behind Subaru. The Head Maid rose in objection as Subaru was pushed one-elbowed towards her. "So, c'mon!"
"G-Garf, hey?!"
"Quit bein' a couple o' awkward kids an' go back to bein' normal chums, fer shit's sake! 'Fore my good self chokes on the awkwardness!" Garf's grin was audible; serious, but not deadly so. Not trying to strongarm anybody, rather Garf wholeheartedly wanted this weirdness between his hero and sister to be dispelled.
"Brother, please—"
"Was the bath pointless? Look, I'm not scared of her in the slightest!" Subaru stepped out of Garf's push, halting Frederica before him. "Honestly. Frederica, listen, I am sorry that I've been so weird. It's nothing to do with you, personally. My head's been full of ants lately, as you can probably tell… Know what I mean?" Rubbing the back of his head let Subaru avoid her unreadable gaze. "Err, the kinda ants that give me negative thoughts. About… you guys and… me. Thoughts that I know aren't true—" Not an utter lie, but a white one nonetheless, "—thoughts that ultimately don't matter, since… it's you guys—" And they would always accept him. Probably. "But, uh…" Subaru forgot where he was going with this.
"Whatever do you mean by that, Your Grace?"
He was put on the spot as Frederica innocently tilted her head—unsure himself, as to why Subaru was so afraid of his loving friends. "N-nothing bad! Just… that I don't have anything to be afraid of… With you guys. When it comes to you guys, I mean! That's… all." He tittered, hand waving. "It's just me being caught up in my own head, in no thanks to anything on the outside!"
Frederica put a finger to her chin in thought, then Garf snorted behind Subaru. "'King o' Cool' s'right."
Damn BRAT. "I HATE you , Meili!"
"Haw-haw!" a cry floated from down the hall—from her and Petra's open door; on normal nights, all their rooms would be public like this, like a college dormitory.
Rubbing his forehead, Subaru said, "I knew you guys were talkin' smack as soon as I left."
"We talk smack about everybody durin' a bath sesh. S'natural selection, r'somethin'."
"It is most definitely not. That's nothing at all like what I explained. That's more like… the Circle of Life."
Garf scratched the side of his head. "M'tellin' ya, Boss—philosophy's jus' lost on me. Garfiel Tinzel lives by his own creed!"
"No, you live by the laws of the Royal Kingdom of Lugnica and, more importantly, mine." Frederica's scowl softened on Subaru, her arms uncrossing and voice re-softening: "While not inaccurate coming out of me, that's what you ought to say to him, Your Grace. I can't help but feel your favoritism towards Garfiel is one of the reasons he's still… well…"
"Hey, be nice to my boy, Garf!" Subaru hooked his arm around the big guy's neck. "He keeps his nose clean during formal occasions, says 'please' and 'thank you,' and even picks up after himself! He's a good boy! Wah! " Subaru's feet dangled against Garf's shins as he straightened up, looking utterly displeased.
"Boss."
"Yo."
"This's some impressive arm strength, but m'gonna kick yer ass."
Subaru kicked his feet, and Garf's shins—to zero reaction. "Do it, jerk."
Garf's jawline above shifted with a grin. "Don't need to. The floor'll do it for me."
A test of strength, then. "Hoo'h!" Subaru wheezed, hoisting himself.
"Err… what, exactly, am I watching?"
"Manly men, doin' manly things."
"Hell yeah!" Subaru gasped, dropping to his feet. "Shoot! My arm is throbbing!"
"Lookit that, didn't even need the floor's help. Boss did 'imself in like always—!" Garf's grin stiffened, then fell in disquiet.
Subaru couldn't help but feel targeted deeply, even though Garf clearly didn't mean it that way.
"Eh, whatever." Garf scratched the back of his head. "Point is, Sis, Boss ain't the type to smother people's souls, jus' to covet some kid's fantasy of what's normal." He smirked as his sister's eyes flared ever so slightly. "S'like the man always says: 'there's a time fer play n' a time fer work.' S'far as work's concerned, he's a king with the future in mind, an' my glorious self's just his bigass fist. Wieldin' a claymore."
"Nah. Zweihander, bro."
"Whassat? S'that of Kararagian make?"
"No. German, my home. World, anyway," Subaru added, drawing a circle in the air. "Anyway, a zweihander's bigger than a claymore. A perfect fit for your beast mode, I dare say."
Garf's eyes sparkled like a pair of huge emeralds. "That sounds freakin' badass! S-Sis—!"
"Please, Garfiel," she sighed, fingers to her brow, "do not pester Master Moriarty with a pointless request that you'll have to forgo in a true fight."
Garf snarled, then twisted aside. "Tch! I could learn. S'if I was gonna ask that anyway." His blush said otherwise.
There was no harm in wanting to try something new. Garf was always looking to push his limits. "One day, though." Subaru grabbed his attention with a clap on the bicep. "I'll remember this conversation, and get you that greatsword. I got your back, little man. Don't worry." Subaru gave a wink—hoping it uplifted the atmosphere from its prior awkwardness.
The grin which threatened to split Garf's face in two, as well as Subaru's heart, helped with that. "You the man, Boss!"
"Ah—hey!" Subaru laughed, headlocked and noogied down to the brain before he could blink.
"Think fast, hup!" Garf unhooked and pushed away from Subaru, sending his buzzing head staggering to Frederica.
"Your Grace," she exclaimed gently, catching him by the hands. She gave Garf a slight glare. "You shouldn't be so rough with your king and his royal person," she said, smoothing Subaru's curls. "He's one of the most important people in the whole world right now, not just ours."
"Don't friggin' remind me." Garf scoffed, stepping around the crystal headlamp Frederica brought towards his bed. "That was nothin', anyway," he said. "I bet Boss's prolly jus' dehydrated from that long soak in the bath. He's an idiot like that."
"Hey, I feel fine!" Subaru looked from Garf rummaging under his bed to Frederica, hands clasped and looking aside, then back at him with knitted brows. A random question sprang to mind for the save: "So why bring a lantern if you guys don't need it?"
"An astute observation, my man, Boss!" Garf crowed hollowly from beneath his bed, extracting a box as a growl rolled softly in Frederica's throat.
"'Astute,' eh? Big word for you, Garf!"
"Eat it!"
Subaru grinned—he would've used that when they first met. In seriousness, this "astuteness" emphasized that they, specifically Frederica, wanted to speak with Subaru for whatever reason.
Unless they were hoping to catch the younger girls.
And then: "Wait," Subaru said, realizing, "but you always got this lamp out, I'm just realizing."
"No shit? I hadn't noticed!" His tone dripped with sarcasm.
"Garf, it's such a minor bauble," Frederica sighed. "Merely a courtesy to our coworkers in times like these, nothing more."
"An' yet it's always on when you're in yer room, too." Garf suddenly tossed from a box, cushioned purple on the inside, a bottle to Subaru. "Think fast!"
"Dude, warn me!" he cried, catching the corked thing in a hug. "What's this, anyway?"
"Pray tell," Frederica agreed.
Garf rubbed a finger beneath his nose. "A special drink," he said then, turning aside. "Been savin' it fer emergencies, but it's s'posed to revitalize a man as if he drank a gallon o' water. Try it. It works."
"So it's like a booster?" They could have used this the last two loops. Subaru found its crystal clear contents dubious—like the liquid had nothing to it. "Eh, I dunno. Only because Mom taught me not to accept beverages from strangers or weird people."
"Wha—?!"
Frederica hummed, laughing into her fingers.
"I'm kidding." The cork popped off without a fight, and Subaru couldn't help himself from taking a sniff—odorless, of course. I'm such a scummy friend. Manipulating Beatrice, making Frederica antsy, lying to Emilia. Scumbag moves, all. He ought to get serious about consciously trusting them.
"Eh, what the heck?" Subaru took a bottoms-up swig, gasping a gulp later. "Hm!" He tasted it some more… or tried to. Subaru smacked his lips. "Where's the flavor?" he asked Garf, the sight of his wide-eyed self alongside a placid Frederica tilting on its axis. "An'... how come you guys're… on the wall now?" Subaru…
…blinked.
Frederica's chompers unsheathed themselves. Was she about to kill Subaru?
'...Wah!' he blinked.
"Garf?" The coldness of Frederica's voice iced the room over. "What did you just do to the King of Lugnica?"
The world was melting. "I'm dyin'!" And so was Subaru, his legs collapsing in a jelly-heap. "Oh, whadda run! Whadda run!"
"Somethin' that'll get 'im honest. Somethin' that'll help 'im an' you—! " Garf gagged, snatched and yanked by the throat in Frederica's paws.
"Neither of us asked you to do this," she uttered, trailing off in a guttural growl.
"Yeah, no shit!" Garf gasped, gripping his sister by the gold enveloping her exposed forearms, "but neither o' ya… 're th' types t' ask fer help, so—!"
"Ohh, no, Garf. Ooooooh, this's bad. Bad to the bone, bad down to my bones…" Subaru held his head—swinging the whole room around with it, woah. "Jesus, Garfiel! I hope ya know, that'cha went, an' did a very big no-no here! …Ya jerk. " Big friggin' dick was more like it.
"Yeah, I know. If you hate me for it, so be it." He shrugged. "If this'll help you, Boss, well, then it's worth it, no? M'sure you understand."
"But we git along fine , though!" Subaru swung his arm upward—that's how chill he and Fred were. Yeah.
"...Garf, I don't think you fully understand what you've done here." Frederica turned her whole self, wide-eyed and unblinking, on her brother. "You went and 'date-raped' the King of Lugnica, our queen's beloved husband, without a second thought."
"Wh-wh—wait, what?! 'R-ra—?' N-no I didn't! Don't be fuckin' gross!" Garf was terrified, Subaru could hear it in his voice if not see it in his wild eyes.
He mentally sat back, awaiting Frederica's interpretation of this: "Don't misunderstand. It's a turn of phrase, concerning a horrific ritual from His Grace's homeland. Villains would infiltrate social gatherings and curse the food and drink. Afterwards, the poison in everyone's bodies would allow them to be manipulated to the intruders' whim." Her green eyes opened, cold as a winter glen, on Garfiel. "What have you done, little brother, if not poison your king with the intent of taking advantage of him?"
"Ah—! That sounds really bad!" Garf grasped the sides of his head. "Shit! I just wanted to help! I didn't mean t' r-ra—f-force myself on the Boss! "
Subaru snorted; in a messed up way, that sounded funny. "This's one'o'th' shittest things you've ever done, Garf. I mean that a thousand… million percent," Subaru burped. He rubbed his stomach; it was writhing warmly, not uncomfortably. But it was new. "Th' hell's n'this? I know i's my first drink, but…" And the full gravity of this situation hit like that boulder in Gusteko once: "Garf!" Subaru flailed to his feet, stumbling—woah, careful. "Ooh." Steady, now. "Garf! Jerk!"
"Quit bullyin' me, Boss. I got feelings too, y'know." He was smirking.
So why make a big deal about it?! "I'm sorry, okay?! But that doesn't change the fact that'choo took away… my drunk! Virginity! "
"Eh? I know yer drunk, but you always said that'cha don't drink—"
"Otto n' I was gonna wait 'till you was eighteen fer my first drunkening, ya fuckin' fuck!" Great. Another thing ruined because Subaru was an idiot. He should've known Garf would pull something like this if he thought it would help… with whatever. A lot. There was a lot Subaru needed help with, that's for sure.
Maybe this was a good thing. Definitely better than doing nothing again, right?
Wait, didn't Subaru promise to talk to Rem tonight? Maybe he ought to—
"What in the world was in that?" Frederica picked the bottle off the ground, analyzing its lack of label. "With just one sip…"
"I… I am… m'sorry, Boss." Garf's apology intruded his thought process, whose guilty, dark expression beside Frederica's concern rendered it all forgotten. "I kinda screwed the pooch on this one, eh? Cuz… Otto, actually, he gave that to me last birthday—"
"In secret, apparently. I'll need to have a word with him."
Subaru snorted. "Rip in peace, Otto."
"Don't give 'im shit, Sis! We agreed not t' drink it till I turned eighteen this year. Though, I dunno'f he knew the Boss would wanna…" Garf bared his teeth, fists tightening on his sides. "Dammit. M'such an idiot."
"What kinda alcohol is's, anyways?" Subaru asked, taking it from Frederica, swinging between two fingers. "I's weerduh."
"Aw." Garf huffed, grinning. "Apparently, Otto's been tryna craft a perfect drink fer years now. Like, as a side project. He calls it, uh, 'Bruwen.' I think."
Bruwen.
Bruwen!
Subaru wheezed with laughter, clapping his hands together and rubbing them. He had to prop himself on his knees, still howling. "Bruwen!" That's great—it's funny because it was like "brew," but with "Suwen" because it's Otto's last name. Fucking hilarious. Shitty puns were the absolute best.
"Well, least he's a happy drunk."
"Wipe that smile off your face, Garf. You've lost the privilege of enjoying your life for the next month," Frederica snapped coolly, saying as Garf gulped, "Now, help me carry him to your bed."
"Nope! I got this, I got it!" Setting Bruwen aside, Subaru fell forward from his kneel, his one hand pushing himself from the tile—only for him to split and fall on his face. "No, wait," he cried. "You don't have to help me, I can do this!" Subaru failed, falling once more. He clenched his pathetic fist, the tile cool on his pounding forehead. I can't even stand without needing their help.
Like Garf, who only went and did this because you're too chickenshit!
There was a deep sigh overhead. "You've really outdone yourself this time, Little Brother."
"Boss, c'mon. S'not a big deal, man. Jus' let us help."
"Do you understand, now, why this is so wrong?" Subaru groaned out as Frederica hoisted him by the armpits without a sound; meanwhile, his brain churned as though full of spaghetti. "He keeps these parts of himself secret for a reason, a good one: a personal one, which is as good and valid a reason as any," Frederica murmured in the distance, beside Subaru's head, his feet shuffling along the tile. "To drag them out without his consent… it's utterly wrong, first and foremost."
Subaru groaned; they were all being such worrywarts. "I jus' wanted t' stand on my own! God-damn-it!"
Big hands held Subaru's back, helping him walk upright to the bed in the corner. "I know it was messed up, alright? But… so long s'it helps 'im—" Garf snarled, his presence shaking its head. "I'll spend the rest o' my lives makin' it up to 'im regardless."
"You don't actually have nine lives, Garf. It's just a joke of Japan that His Grace teases you with."
"...Yeah."
Japan… Home… I wish I could ask Mom and Dad what they'd do in this situation. Subaru had it in mind to lay down when they reached the smooth covers of Garf's bed, but Frederica lifted his legs and person, settling him down before he could commit. "Thanks, Frederica." It was hard not to sound so pitiable, but he really did make her do some unnecessary things.
Like fighting Witch Cultists time and again. And die, time and time again. "Sorry, Frederica…"
"It was no trouble at all, Your Grace." Her smile assured this. "I only want to make sure you're comfortable."
"I am," Subaru relented; his pajamas were amazingly soft on his body, too. "M'super comf."
Garf knelt, elbows on the bed. "So, Boss, uh… what's on yer mind? Got somethin' that needs doin'?"
Subaru narrowed his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, I got somethin' on my mind, here, ol' Garfiel."
"Oh? Whassat?" His face was plain innocent.
"Somethin' like… the brick wall to my innermost thoughts, of course!" Subaru grinned at the cleverness of his punchline. "Boo on you, Garf. I know what'cher tryna do here."
"A flawless plan of attack, Brother."
"Shut up, Sis, I thought he'd be more like Otto!"
"Complaining about everything?" Frederica gave a laugh. "Alcohol exaggerates our personalities, Little Brother, and does little to their foundations. His Grace was never going to be the same as Otto, no matter how inebriated."
Didn't Subaru resolve to be more honest? Wasn't getting this carefree and silly good help for that?
"So, now what?"
"What else? We wait for His Grace to sober-up, before returning him to Queen Emilia with our foreheads to the ground."
Garf huffed, frowning, as he turned to rest against the bed. "Figured as much. Gives us plenty o' time t' chill, at least… Right, Boss?"
"Ugh…" This was gonna suck.
Frederica let out a breath. "I can tell there's an understanding here that I'm not a part of. What in the world did you two discuss this morning?" She gave a start, hand flying to her mouth as she said to Subaru, "U-unless that's classified, which, if that's the case—"
In this case, it was as good a segway as any. "Eye'll tell ya wha'i'is… Freder-eeka, you sweet lug, you." It was the least she deserved, Subaru had to remind himself.
"Ah." The Head Maid was statue-still. "So a 'lug' is how you see me, Your Grace."
"Huh?!"
Her face tilted down. "Alcohol often reveals ingrained truths we'd rather keep to ourselves."
"N-not in a bad way! I mean, a big ol' lug like a… like a teddy bear're somethin'!"
"Nice."
"Shushup, Garf."
"Your Grace, you shouldn't judge women for things they can't do anything about. Even if well-intentioned, being reminded of their perceived shortcomings will only hurt."
Subaru crossed his arms—arm. "Then I'll just have t' hug ya, an' snuggle ya, 'till ya love yer big ol' luggin' self more!"
Garf shrugged. "Well, he don't think yer ugly. Be flattered, Sis!"
"I'm over the moon." Frederica exhaled. "Going off what little I know of inebriation… it's likely he means this as innocently as it appears."
"Hmm, yeah. I do. Fred's pretty but she's more huggable than anything." Subaru felt bad regardless, manipulating her heart just now—all of them, without ever meaning to. It's simply how the corpseater splatters. "Sorry, Frederica. I'm a shallow kinda guy who has gut reactions about people. Hate me for it."
"We all have such thoughts, Your Grace. They're nothing more than first impressions, and you're seldom one to act on or covet them unchangingly. It's one of your good qualities, Your Grace."
"Aw, sweet! There's a plus-side t' this guy!" Subaru almost forgot he had one of those. The siblings chuckled good-naturedly, especially Frederica; was she playing all this up, or what? Subaru waited… and sure enough, she veered her eyes, covered her mouth like she had all day. Like when they first got acquainted. "Fred, why're you always hidin' yer teeth?" He meant in general around people, but Frederica stammered before he could rectify.
"Your Grace, I—"
"Blunt question! Drunk question! Ignore me!"
"N-no, it's quite alright—"
"Yeah, i's quite alright—OO'H! " Garf collapsed sideways out of sight, belly clutched.
Frederica glowered to herself, rubbing her elbow. For such a strong person, her arms were so smooth and ladylike; hardly muscled. "Your Grace?"
Something about that, among other things, made her insecure. "Tha'really was an'nsensitive question." Lifting his gaze, Frederica's stricken face floated into view, forearm clutched. "I already know why, m'so messed up fer wantin' t' hear it from ya."
"Y-you're not, Your Gra—"
"Subaru!" Subaru groaned.
There was a second's pause. "I… I'm sorry?"
Throwing a hand in the air, he clarified, "Jus' call me Subaru, lady! God! Gives me hives, always bein' so formal with ya."
The full weight of what he'd just said didn't hit before Frederica uttered, "I never realized you felt such discomfort… S-Subaru."
"Sorry, was exaggerating fer comedic effect." Subaru felt lame all of a sudden… but Frederica wasn't one to judge, so it was whatever: "I just get a little down, is all, whenever I feel that distance between us. Nothin' as bad as discomfort."
Frederica blinked, swallowed, said nothing. "I… fail to see how that isn't a discomfort, Your Grace. The House… us… we're almost as important to you as Queen Emilia is."
"Tha's what I'm sayin'! I's jus' one o' those ants in my head, Fred, y'know? S'not somethin' for you to feel bad over. Not fer a li'l ant r'somethin'."
"But I caused you distress thoughtlessly. Any who are an acquaintance of His Grace—o-of you, S-Subaru," Frederica mumbled, "would know you don't care for formalities, and yet… in my efforts to appear respectable, I've apparently caused you some amount of harm."
She didn't need to feel so remorseful over it; it was barely a thing. "I's jus' a name."
"Wasn't this about our relationship, Your Grace, Subaru?"
He did open with that as the point of discussion. Even so: "I really don't lose any sleep over it."
Frederica sagged as though in disappointment. "Perhaps not, no, but you've wasted thoughts on something so avoidable and pointless."
"Sheesh, Fred, is it avoidable f'it's all on me t' say somethin'?" Subaru rubbed the dull ache in his forehead. "Yer an excellent maid, you know that?"
"It would be easier to take the compliment if you didn't sound so irritated by that," Frederica said lightly.
"Jus' take the compliment, sheesh!" Subaru laughed. "God, why'm I hearin' myself when you open yer mouth all'f a sudden? Yer like… the voice that tries justifyin' being angry."
Garf sat upright. "Probably 'cuz you n' Sis've got a ditch-deep opinion of yourselves andja know it, is my guess anyways."
Frederica scowled, her expression twinging. "Garf, I think you should lea—"
"Whaaa?!" If she felt as badly as Subaru did, that wasn't right. It was illegal, even. "Y'all are the bomb, whatchu mean?!"
"It's nothing so severe, Your Grace," said Frederica, hand waving with reassurance. "Garf believes it's his place to take issue with the way I live my life, is all."
He turned his nose up. "S'because it's cowardly."
"Not every demihuman wants to flash their wild side as brazenly as you do, Little Brother."
"'Course not. But they sure as shit ain't right in the heart f'they wanna play human." He said this, reaching and wriggling Frederica's crystal lantern between them. "You've always been weird about this, but today yer—"
"And you've always been accepting of it."
"Until the Boss broke yer spine, it seems. Can't stand my amazin' older sis actin' like such a weakling. Makes me sick to my stomach."
Frederica touched her heart. "Garf…"
"Guys, please…" Subaru couldn't decide if this was a tense argument or sibling bickery. "I'm still on the lantern. Didn't Fred jus' have that in case a non-demi, err, human … wanted to speak with'er?" The stupidity of that question was swift: No, no, you asshole—it's clearly not the only reason, and this's all because you looked at her funny this morning. Like an emotional idiot. As usual.
"Ah," piped up Frederica, "I see what you're trying to do, Little Brother, and it's not going to work."
Garf turned to Subaru in a huff. "Boss, what'd Sis do t' make you so damn wary o' her?"
She plunged her fingers above his brow, snarling like he was an enemy to be euthanized. "I'm not 'wary' of someone as sweet as Frederica." Subaru forced a laugh. "Okay?"
"You looked like you were gonna shit yerself at the sight o' her this morning."
"He—err, crassness aside—looked to everybody that way, Little Brother."
"He didn't and you know it." To this, Frederica winced her head down.
"Whatever the king feels is his business," she said. "He made it clear, even in this state, that he doesn't wish to talk."
"Naw. You don't know 'im, Sis." She grit her teeth at this. "What he really wishes, is you 'n all the others yer best… Fer you t' love yer life, 'cause everybody oughta. That's our Boss, Sis. That's what he wants from ya. So, meetin' 'im halfway?" Garf said softly. "'s the way to help 'im, y'know."
Frederica lifted her widening eyes, her nostrils flaring as she breathed steadily. "He… can come to his maid if that's what His Grace so desires."
"Yer scared."
"You're out of line," Frederica snapped, shooting to her full, towering height. "This is uncomfortable, Garfiel—you're being far too invasive!"
"'Kay. Boss, Sis wants t' help ya, n' you wanna help 'er—so, c'mon. Ask 'er fer help."
"Garfiel, whatever you do, do not pressure and bully His Majesty."
Garf popped to his feet, hand swiping. "He ain't no little shit! Boss! Ask why she hides 'er teeth, lugs a lamp around, an' pretends she ain't nothin' more than her damn job!" Garf grunted with a squeak at the end through mushed cheeks, wrangled tight between Frederica's human hands.
"You're getting too emotional, Little Brother," she growled, hardly containing hers. "I think you should take a walk and cool down. You're on thin ice as it is on the outset, with this little stunt. I'd hate for you to melt through out of blind anger."
Garf looked ready to protest, but Subaru had had enough of his childishness: "Bro, leave."
"Boss—"
"Git outta 'ere!" Subaru threw his hand in a wide arc towards Garf, hitting the side of the bed, flat on his belly.
"You heard His Grace." Frederica's voice was softer than before. "We'll be out of your room shortly."
"What?! I gotta evict myself outta my own—?!"
"Be grateful you still have a room in this castle!" And then Garf snarled out, drawing Subaru to the sight of his broader self being shoved through the doorway. Bruwen stood uncorked on the tile floor near the middle of the room—stupid alcohol, always breaking the good times as much as it did make them. "Now! Get! Out!" Shoulder, elbow, then a shove with both hands—Garf stumbled into the hall, his shocked face the last sight before Frederica's back and palms flattened the door shut.
And she let loose a long, trembling exhale—a sigh that went on and on as her face fell into her palms, kneading her eyes.
Subaru propped himself on his elbow, or tried to, before the spinning room forced his weak self back into the pillow. "Fredericaaa," he moaned anyway, "yer so cool, Fredericaaa~"
Her face lifted, slick and stunned. "I-I—what? Your Grace?"
He snorted; she was so not expecting that. "Yer jus' really awesome sometimes." She'd plunged her fingers into his brow—sparing him and Emilia from a horrendous fate. "Alotta the time, actually. The way you take charge o' the room whenever ya speak? I's so cool." Subaru wished he could do that; usually he was ribbed and quipped at, outside of official business.
"I see." Frederica's feet padded against the tile, hands folded against the front of her nightgown. She was smiling at him. "The compliment is genuinely appreciated, Your Grace. S-Subaru… I must admit, though, that this is never something I put a lot of thought into." She slowed still, expression sagging. "Or ever, really. It's unsightly, isn't it? Stooping to Garfiel's level of emotional control? Ah," sighed Frederica, shaking her head. "No matter how old we get, I'm sure my brother is going to drive me crazy until I'm old and gray."
"You n' me both. But yer fine, Fred! Literally, you're perfect pretty much, like, all the time. Fer real. Don't even sweat it."
As per usual, Frederica's expression was emotionless—it was starting to be like a thinking face. Then, a smile bloomed, one big and warm. "Despite the circumstances," she said, "it brings me no small pleasure to know you feel that way." As if to demonstrate, her posture relaxed then and there, like a weight was lifted off her shoulders.
The Siblings Baumann and Tinzel
