"So...?"

"What exactly is your request? It is not this club's job to figure that out. You need to be clear."

"Grr. I already told you! Hayato won't accept anything I make for him so I want this damn club to figure out a way for him to accept mine and nobody else's. Those homewreckers!" Seriously? Does he have to be this popular? Damn his good looks.

"But if he accepts Miura-san's gift then he'll have to accept mine too" Ah, I forgot she was here. Iroha Isshiki, homewrecker number 1... Hold on, why is she here?

"Why are you here?"

"Ah, I'm waiting for Senpai"

"Senpai?"

"She's talking about Hikki"

"Speaking of Hikigaya-kun...Does he not have the decency to be here on time?" I don't think that was a question.

"Hiratsuka-sensei called him to her office after class. Not sure what he did though"

"Perhaps someone has reported him for being a nuisance"

"Yukinon! That's mean" For his friends, they bash him a lot. The door slides open

"Yo"

"Greetings Hikigaya-kun"

"Yahello"

"Senpai!"

He walks to his seat and opens his light novel. Huh? Where'd that come from? Before he starts reading he looks around and his eyes land on me. He sighs and puts his book down.

"We have a request, don't we?"

"Yes. If you were here at the correct time you would be better informed"

"Oi, it's not my fault. I was coerced into performing activities against my will" Why does that sound so wrong?

"Ahh, Hikki! Don't say things like that"

"Huh? What are you- oh. Tsk."

"Yugihama-san. Hikigaya-kun is talking about redoing his essay. What exactly were you thinking about?"

"Oh, OH! Um... I thought the same thing" Yukinoshita just sighs and looks at Hikio.

"Senpai?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm bored" Is she his needy girlfriend?

"Ugh. You're acting like a needy girlfriend right now" It's creepy we thought the same thing

"Senpai... Do you have to be like that unless... that's a roundabout way of confessing to me?! I'm sorry but you need to try 29 more times before I accept you" She does a bow but hits her head on the table "Oww"

"Maybe all that energy should go to your brain instead"

"Senpai!! How mean" Was this scripted?

"Now then, since we're all settled in let's discuss Miura-sans reason for being here" Yukinoshita says

"Finally! I was starting to think this is a comedy club instead of human resources. This is like the third time I have to say this. At this point, it might be easier to just figure it out myself"

"By all means, do it yourself." Hikio you bastard "But I'm pretty sure the only reason you're here is because you couldn't figure it out yourself" The only thing you have going for you is your brain. Hah, take that. Wait... I didn't say that out loud. Damn.

"Tsk"

"Hikki. That was mean!"

"..." He picks up his book and starts reading

"Hikigaya-kun. Try to show restraint when dealing with our clients. Some of them do not know how disgusting you are"

"Freeze them before they get to me Ice Queen"

"My, my. How rude Germgaya-kun. It's almost-" As entertaining as this is, I don't care

"Is this club going to help me or not?!"

"Of course. Explain your request one more time"

"I want to give Hayato-kun something for valentines day but he isn't accepting anything from anyone and every time I tried he just turned me down. This club is my last option and you can tell I'm desperate if I'm here"

"I see" Yukinoshita puts her hand on her chin "He isn't accepting any tokens of affection due to his position in the classroom as well as the atmosphere"

"The atmosphere?" What does that mean?

"If he accepts a gift from a female then the class will be focused on that person. It will cause animosity among students while also affecting the reputation of Hayama-kun. He does not accept anything due to that reason. It would be different if he wasn't popular. Take for example Hikigaya-kun..."

"Hmm" He nods and glares at Yukinoshita

"... If he were to receive any token of affection it would affect no one apart from the female giving it to him" That explanation was... wow. Damn smart people

"So Hayato will only accept something if he becomes Hikki" Uhh... "But no one can handle more than one Hikki. That's sad enough"

"More air goes to your boobs than your brain" Hikio tells her. Ne wasn't that a bit too rude and completely perverted. This bastard

"Hikki you meanie!!" She just ignored the boob part.

"Moving on. This might be a bit harder than our regular cases..." Cases? Is she pretending to be a detective? It would be cute if she wasn't so damn annoying.

"What do you think Senpai?"

"The solution seems pretty obvious"

"These solutions sound not involve suicidal means" The fuck does she mean suicidal means!

"Tsk. Always ruining my fun... The solution seems pretty obvious"

"Do tell Hikigaya-kun"

"Yeah, If Ice Queen couldn't figure it out, what makes you think you can?!"

"Miura-san. Please refrain from using that nickname"

"As if I'd listen to you"

"Fire and Ice. Not good" someone whispers. I snap my head to see Hikio averting his eyes. He knows exactly how to get on my nerves

"What's the solution Senpai?"

"What if Hayama got into a situation where society forces him to accept the token of young girls affection without any strings attached"

"Why did you word it like that! Now it seems like my precious Hayato is going to a b-b-b-b-b-"

"You're a real Perv Miura." I glare at him. He doesn't back down and turns to Yukinoshita "Isn't there like an extracurricular activity where you learn how to make chocolates and cookies and all that. Maybe get Hayama to be a taste tester or whatever those are called" He goes back to reading his book

"Yay Senpai!"

"Wow. Hikki can be smart sometimes"

He ignores them all and continues to read his light novel. Hmm, I actually read that one. The ending is a bit... weird.

"Not bad Hikigaya-kun... although, it might be a bit suspicious if only one person is judging a whole group of amateur cooks" That makes sense. He might politely decline and leave "Hikigaya-kun?" She wants him to test what we make too?! Yeah, no. This perv better not even thin-

"No" Huh? He doesn't want to?

"I don't remember asking"

"No"

"It is understandable if you had plans. Fortunately, this is considered club work and unless you want to talk to Hiratsuka-sensei I suggest you attend as one of the judges" Why does she want him as a judge? I'm sure we can find someone better

"Bitch"

"Alright then. We have 2 judges. Are there any more suggestions?"

"How are we gonna get Hayama-senpai to attend?"

"Miura-san. Would you be able to convince Hayama-kun to attend this gathering?"

"Hmm. Maybe. Not sure though"

"If he resists we always have a backup plan" She says with a serious face. Yui gasps

"Are you going to ... take him out?" She motions her finger across her neck. Yui I love you but please, shut up.

"Yugihama-san. There will be no bodily harm involved"

"Oh, that's good" Why does she sound disappointed?!

"Hikigaya-kun is plan B"

"I'm what now?" "He's what now?" Why the hell is he Plan B

"Yes. You and Hayama-kun seem close based on your past interactions. I'm sure it will be easy to convince him. This does count as club work"

"If is see you on fire and I had a glass of water I would gladly drink that water and watch as you burn" Dark... and really specific

"How imaginative. At least something is improving"

"How is he gonna convince Hayato if I can't? It might be impossible for this pervert" Take that

"Hikigaya-kun" They both just ignored me!

"Whatever. I might be able to pull some strings... Owing that bastard leaves a bad taste in my mouth" He scrunches his face in disgust...

"Then it's settled. Once we get the okay from Hikigaya-kun, we should move ahead with our plans"

"You sound like a damn war general"

"I like the sound of that"

"I think Yukinon just found a new fetish"

"No I haven't" She has a blush on her face. Hold on, what happened to Isshiki? I look to where she is and... Wow. Are they together or something? She almost doesn't look like a thieving homewrecker when she's sleeping on his shoulder... almost

"Hikigaya-kun, wake Isshiki-san up. The club will be closing soon" Now this is surprising. I sense a hint of jealousy in her tone. Does she...? Even Yui is looking at him like that! The self-proclaimed king of loners has two girls chasing him, probably 3 if Isshiki is also... Oh My God, he has a harem. Why?!! If anyone deserves a Harem it's Hayato... no, that's not right, Hayato belongs to me

"I'm not waking her" Maybe they are dating "She's not even sleeping"

"C'mon Senpai. You seriously had no reaction to that. How many girls do you let sleep on you? Cheater! Pervert! Hachiman!"

"My name is not an insult"

"It sounds like one" I say. That was pretty good. He turns to me

"Oh, Miura, you're still here?" Grr, I really want to kill him.

Time skip

How did he do it?! I don't get it! I'm always with Hayato, almost every day. And he still told me he wouldn't be able to come here so how in the hell did Hikio convince him to be here? It does raise the question... What's going on between those two? I'm really lucky Hina isn't here, she would definitely have a lot of theories about this... a lot of nosebleeds too. Ah, we're starting.

It's confirmed. Hikio has a harem. It includes Yukinoshita, the homewrecker, and my precious Yui. Sigh, he was right, her brain doesn't get enough air. Why do they even like him? It doesn't make sense. He's lazy, perverted, and... well that's the only thing. I've never actually talked to him without being annoyed at his existence. In my defense, his existence is annoying.

"Yo" Speak of the devil

"What?"

"Ice Queen said I should come over and do my job or something like that"

"Hmm... Likely story" She would say something like that

"Sigh. Did you finish your chocolate?"

"Yeah, wanna taste?"

"Why not" I pick up a piece and put it in his mouth...

I what? I can already feel my heated face. At least Hikio isn't affected by this... Don't blush! That will make me blush... even more. We stare at each other for a few awkward moments before I avert my eyes. Dammit, this is the right rom-com moment, it was just the wrong person! "Ahem. Um, it's good. Maybe um, add a bit more sugar" He speed walks away.

That. Was. So. Damn. Awkward.

"Miura-san"

"Ah, Hayato-kun. What are you doing here?" I really hope my face isn't as flushed

"Hikitani-kun invited me. Um, he was pretty convincing" He lets out a nervous laugh. Suspicious, very suspicious. Almost as if... Hina's really affecting me

"Hmm"

"Anyway... Shall we?"

"Huh?" Is he asking me out? I've been waiti-

"Your chocolate" Oh

"Right" I motion for him to pick up a piece because I didn't really want a repeat of... Hold on! I want a repeat of what happened! I turn my head and... he's already eaten it. Sigh, there goes my chance

"Hmm. It's good. It's really sweet. Hikitani-kun likes these overly sweet things" Hold the fuck up! Isn't that something friends know? Hikio doesn't really have any friends, he's made that clear... more than once. So how the hell does Hayato know this?! I'm getting some BL vibes here.

"Oh, I didn't know that" I didn't really care

"Yeah. He doesn't really talk to me but Haruno-san made it clear when she talks about him"

"Haruno?"

"This was great. Excuse me, I have more judging to do" And he ignored me. It seems like there's more between these two than meets the eye. Who the hell is Haruno? Is she in his harem? If she is then that's a bit impressive. A loner has a part of his harem out of the school. Damn, I still hate him but I can at least respect that... Maybe I'm overthinking this. Definitely, I shouldn't even be thinking about this.

Now then, just a few things that are a bit different from canon. This story is... semi-canon. Some parts will be in the canon, the others might be inspired from canon and some parts might be completely made up.

1) Orimoto isn't involved in this scene, the other school still is but she isn't. If you've read the other chapters before I took it down then it should be clear, if not too bad.

2) Haruno isn't here, she'll show up in the later chapters