A/N: This takes inspiration from those memes about the Skullgirls community not having any update for the game with the TF2 community meme-ing itself in similarity to Skullgirls in the terms of a long wait for an update.
So to all Team Fortress 2 and Skullgirls fans, I present you all this crazy, bizarre, scandalous content of a crossover!
Disclaimer: Team Fortress 2 belongs to Valve Corporation, and Skullgirls belongs to Lab Zero Games
(Team Fortress 2 -Scream Fortress- Soundtrack: Haunted)
It was that time of the year that many people loved taking the opportunity to dress up. That time of the year, where children in cute costumes roam the streets, trick or treating on the houses for sweet, sweet candies. A yearly tradition to mess around in costumes.
But to the mercenaries of Mann, the tradition of Halloween is nothing more but the opposite of trick or treating. Sure, the mercs put up their best efforts by wearing their best cosmetics, but for them -Halloween is merely a yearly tradition of a once a year attack from an ancient wizard; Merasmus. Everybody blames the Soldier. Particularly, the Red team's Soldier -Since every mercenary on the Blu team are merely clones, leaving those on Red, the originals.
"MERASMUS!" Came a loud yell out of the top of the lungs. Apparently, it's usually both soldiers on both the Red and Blu team's. But considering the loudest one, specifically comes directly from the Red Soldier.
The entirety of the twisted match was too occupied that both teams like every once a year, ends up on teaming up against their yearly visitor: An ancient wizard, Merasmus. Or for simple introduction: The Red Soldier's former roommate.
Although the team of both opposing sides were distracted by the giant eye, Monoculus, and the Headless Horseless Horsemann, the Soldier didn't find any struggle dealing with the wizard as he rocket jumped on various spots around the map of Mann Manor while head on, fighting the wizard.
"You fool! You dare anger me!? Never! Anger! A magician!" Merasmus shouted as he casted a spell of green projectiles toward the patriot, who only laughed while managing himself to avoid each projectile by his rocket jumps.
"HAH! LEARN HOW TO AIM MAGGOT!" The Soldier mocked as he rocket jumped above the wizard, who immediately, raised his staff, ready to counterattack.
"I've had enough of you, Soldier! You are the worst roommate! Ever!" Merasmus shouted but as the two collided and both fell on the ground, the Soldier was the first to get back on his feet and started cheering on his victory.
"I WON! YAAAAAY!" Cheered the Red patriot. Though, seeing his teammates just looking at him with mixed expressions, he wasn't stupid enough to see none of the others on his team took the amusement. Rather, all looked displeased.
"WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU ALL MAGGOTS LOOKING AT?" Soldier questioned, but to see the rest of his team just staring, the Scout was the first to respond.
"Uh... Do you ever get freakin' tired with all this crap? It's the same old crap that wizard always pulls every year. Like seriously... This sucks!" Scout said, rather in a much complainant way.
"I do believe the scout is right. This is pointless, in fact - I am surprised that the old woman on the speakers even allow such things like this to happen on this very season of the year..." The Spy added, although his tone was displeased for ever agreeing on with the Scout.
"YOU MAGGOTS DARE QUESTION THE BATTLEFIELD HERE? THIS IS STILL WAR!" Soldier argued while pointing at Merasmus who was slowly getting back up and was cursing to himself.
"Soldier, lad. Tat bloody wizard is 'ol news! We should be drinkin' insteada' fightin' 'im..." Demoman slowly commented before pulling out his bottle of Scrumpy, then proceeding to chug it down.
"I do believe the Demo has a point. And besides... Blu team seems to enjoy themselves more on fighting these... Magical things that the wizard summons against us." The Medic also interrupted, to which the other mercs even gave a small nod of agreement.
The Soldier was about to protest but decided not to, as he had no words to yell out other than his hatred for the wizard to whom the Soldier looked at.
"You fools... Wait... Where's... Oh there he is... Bombinomicon! Attack these fools!" Shouted Merasmus, but only laughter came in response, directly from the other mercs.
"Yeah like that'll work..." Sniper muttered while shaking his head.
"Da. Book not listen to wizard. Why not send wizard somewhere else and not bother us, da?" Heavy thoughtfully said, to which, the other mercs even thought of it for a moment.
"FOOLS! I'LL DESTROY YOU ALL- What..?" Merasmus' eyes quickly noticed the book on the floor. Bombinomicon, slowly floating and glowing green. Soldier took notice of this as well. But as he did turned his attention back at his teammates, who were all confused for a moment as they watched the book float - Bombinomicon suddenly spoke.
"Okay guys! Let's give Merasmus and Soldier a vacation! Oh! And have some bombs guys!" Bombinomicon cheerfully said before launching bombs are the mercs - Who were all too surprised at what the book said and did.
After ten seconds of respawn, they immediately ran back, weapons drawn to the exact same area where they were killed. Except... It was just Bombinomicon there, chucking bombs at the Blu team - Who were all being dominated by Monoculus and the Headless Horsemann...
"You stupid fat bald bastard. The book really did sent Merasmus away, with Soldier!" Scout was the only one that snapped in shocked.
(Skullgirls OST: The Legend Of The Skull Heart)
The only thing that went to his vision was blackness. Then he blacked out. But as he slowly regained consciousness, Soldier groaned softly on the ground then noticed Merasmus unconscious only a few feet away from him.
"DAMMIT! MERASMUS! LOOK WHAT YOUR STUPID BOOK DID! WHERE THE HELL ARE WE?" Soldier demanded as he stomped at the unconscious wizard. Little did he know was that Merasmus was unconscious at the moment. And that he was a little late to notice his own voice has changed by the time he yelled at the passed out wizard.
"WHAT?" Soldier said and heard his own voice again. "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH MY VOICE? IT SOUNDED LIKE-" Soldier stopped. He didn't wanted to say the word. But to see the ocean before him. He realized, he was laying unconscious on the sand. Then noticing on what was behind him. He realized he and Merasmus was currently on a bay.
Soldier didn't said a word. Instead, walked toward the water of the waving ocean only to see his reflection on the water itself. It terrified Soldier. His entire physic, was slender. A yet curvy figure, covered in a man's military outfit and the tucked pants on his boots clearly wrapped around his legs - Much like his upper clothing, showing his fully, curvy, slender figure. His face without his helmet on, showed his red shoulder length hair, making him a ginger. And his face has physically changed from his manly look, into a stunning, supermodel type that could only be seen on women. And by god, Soldier's eyes widened open to see his own chest - It was a pair of noticeably round-
"MERAAASMUUUUUSSS! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME! MAGGOT!?"