A/N Thank you very much for stopping by to check out my newest Bethyl story. I hope you enjoy it.
We begin the chapter with Daryl and Beth in high school and advance 10 years in the future by the end.
Possible Trigger: Physical Abuse
00
The state doesn't allow high school students to be more than twenty years of age, Daryl turned twenty in the early fall. This is his last shot. If he doesn't complete all the requirements and get his diploma this year he's done, he'll age out.
He tells himself the same thing every day, it doesn't matter he's too damn old for high school anyway. When he's there he feels uncomfortable, awkward and out of place, but he knows he'll feel even worse if he doesn't achieve this one goal. He's got himself convinced that if he can pull it off it will set him apart from the rest of the Dixon clan. There's more to it though, he's hoping if he succeeds he won't feel like such a loser.
It's a double-edged sword. Being his age and still being in high school, surrounded by a bunch of kids, has in many ways contributed to his feelings of inadequacy. He knows he doesn't fit in with the rest of the students, he knows he's the subject of whispered stories and gossip, shit, he knows he's the only one who needs to shave every day. It makes him feel even more uncomfortable.
It's not his fault he's as old as he is and still in high school. His father's actions are to blame. He might have graduated on time if he hadn't missed so many days. His home has always been a harsh and frightening place, and what happens in the Dixon home is the reason he's been held back.
Growing up the way he did, school was a place to escape to and he did his best to get there every day, even after a beating, but his home life began affecting his school life when he was in third grade. That was the year he missed over a month of class in one stretch. The old man told the school it was because Daryl had a case of the flu he couldn't seem to shake. What Daryl really had was a broken arm and a broken face, thanks to that same Dad, Will Dixon.
The old man knew that once the teacher saw the eight year old's injuries she'd call child services. Child services would call the cops and Will Dixon's ass would get hauled off to jail. So no school for Daryl and no way to make up for all the time he missed. He repeated third grade the following year. In seventh grade it was a similar set of circumstances that kept him out of school, and again he was held back.
The elder Dixon usually made it a point not to leave marks or any other evidence where it would show. But those two times Will Dixon had been so loaded up on crank he forgot his own rules.
So, at 20 years old Daryl Dixon is a man going to school with kids. Despite the negative aspects, he's hanging in. Maybe just to prove to himself he can. He's determined to achieve his one and only goal in life. Get a high school diploma.
Schoolwork doesn't come easy for him but he's been doing okay. He's getting by in most of his classes, even doing pretty well in a couple of them. There's just that one class he's struggling with.
Math is a mystery to him. They may as well be speaking Greek, that's how well he understands what's going on. The trouble is, there's a basic math requirement to get a diploma and he's got to pass this course. But he just can't get it. It's the math teacher who comes to his rescue, she sets him up with a tutor. A girl named Beth Greene.
He's been told to meet this girl in the math classroom, room 101, right after his last class of the day. He'd almost rather take a beating than spend another hour on math after school, but shit, he's got to at least pull off a low C. So he does like he's been told, if he's going to get that diploma he has to do whatever it takes.
He walks in the classroom ready to suffer another hour of math, then he sees her. It's clear to him the minute he lays eyes on Beth Greene, there's something unique about her. He can't put a name to it, he just knows it's there. It's something that makes her different, better than everyone else. Not in some stuck up way, in a good way.
It's not something he sees. It's something he feels.
It isn't her pretty hair or her creamy looking skin. It isn't her bright blue eyes or her sweet smile. It's a quality that lies beneath her surface beauty, some kind of inner beauty that draws him to her.
The first few times they work together he can't stop wondering what it is about her, but as time goes on and he gets to know her a little bit he realizes exactly what it is. Beth Greene is the rarest and purest kind of person. She's a person without guile. How can that even be in this world? He doesn't know, but he knows it's true.
He appreciates that about her even more than he appreciates her natural physical beauty, but he tries not to think of her in any way except as a girl who has become a friend to him and a big help in him attaining his goal.
But he can't afford trouble. Every day he reminds himself Beth Greene is only 14 years old. She's strictly off limits for anything aside from schoolwork and friendship.
They've settled into a routine. They meet three days a week in room 101 right after the last bell. She's patient with him and he needs that. He's so impatient with himself. Even better than her patience is the fact that unlike a lot of folks, Beth Greene never treats him like he's stupid or worthless. She always has a cheerful smile when she tells him not to worry, it's okay and his answers are so close. She smiles and says, "You've almost got it Daryl, just keep trying."
As time has passed he and Beth have become good friends. In fact, she's the only real friend he's ever had. They talk about what they'd like to do when they get out of school, and she always seems so sure when she tells him he's capable of being anything he wants to be.
He always gives her a small smile and a nod, but even though he knows she means what she says, he's never been quite able to believe it. Still, he sure does like hearing those things from her.
He begins meeting her bus when she gets to school in the mornings, then walking her to homeroom. Soon they start having their lunches together too, and on those days when she tutors him he waits with her after their session until her sister Maggie or her brother Shawn show up to drive her home. The other two days of the week he walks her to the school bus and waits until she's safely on board and the bus drives away.
He's careful though, very careful. He has to be. He's never held her hand, he never even lets himself get close enough for their hands to accidentally brush against one another, and he never sees her anywhere other than school. She's way too young and he's way too old.
It's not like he's had a lot of experience with girls anyway. Yet sometimes he can't help wondering what it could be like if things were different. What if she was a little older and he was a little younger, would he have the nerve to ask her out? Probably not.
He has a dream though, it's a deep dark secret dream he keeps to himself. Maybe when she's older, when she's 18 and out of high school and he has a good job, maybe by then he'll have the nerve to drive out to her family's farm and ask her out.
He doesn't have a lot of hopes and dreams, but he hopes someday this one dream can come true.
Then one day all of his hopes, dreams and goals are crushed.
The day the lie is told.
It obviously took place over the weekend, but the crime isn't discovered until early Monday morning by the school custodian. The snack and beverage machines in the student cafeteria and those in the student quad have been vandalized, all contents have been stolen and all the money has been taken.
The police are called but they can't find any evidence. There are no fingerprints and whoever pulled off the theft also broke the security cameras.
Everyone is worried about school safety and security and the principal's phone has been ringing off the hook. The man feels pressured to quickly bring the incident to a close in order to satisfy both his staff and the parents of his students. They need reassurance that the school is a safe place. But how?
It's two days after the incident when Daryl is called to the principal's office. He's told that an eyewitness to the crime has come forward. He's also warned that the police will be called if he doesn't admit his guilt and agree to leave school for good.
The principal reminds him that at 20 years old he'll face a prison sentence, not just a brief stint in juvenile detention. Daryl shakes his head in disgust, like what? Like maybe he's too dumb to figure that out on his own?
The principal acts as though he's being benevolent when he tells Daryl, "We're trying to keep this quiet Dixon, we don't want parents getting upset and thinking the school doesn't have security. I'm also doing you a favor if you agree to go without a fuss I won't call the police. Take it or leave, heck kid with your school record you'd probably never graduate anyway."
It's a dark day and the same old shit Daryl's had to deal with his entire life. He's a Dixon so he must be guilty.
Maybe it would be different if he had an interested parent who gave two shits and was willing to fight for him. If that were the case they wouldn't be so quick to make him their scapegoat. He would have a chance. But he doesn't have a parent who's anything like that.
He knows he's screwed so he angrily signs the paper, stands and throws the pen down on the principal's desk while growling, "Fuck you asshole. I never took nuthin' and ya know it! Your snitch is probably the one that done it."
He leaves the school in a hurry, his adrenaline is in overdrive and he has no place to go. He gets on his old Honda trail bike and rides it all over town, like he's looking for someone or something. All he's really doing is trying to burn off a little steam. He parks it, walks around downtown and finds himself at the liquor store. He gave up the smokes a while back, but now seems like a good time to start up again. He's just purchased a pack of Marlboro's when Randal Jones walks in.
Daryl has never much cared for that little asshole, but the guy always seems to know everything that's going on at school and around town. All Daryl wants to know is the name of the lying bastard who turned him in. He figures if anyone knows who did it, or who lied about him, Randal's the one.
They step out on the sidewalk and he asks Randal straight out what he knows, who the fuck it was. It's clear Randal is real nervous about being questioned, but then he always has acted nervous around Daryl. Daryl thinks it's because he has a reputation for being a hot-headed tough guy. He doesn't feel he deserves that, he's never been in a fight at school, but Randal is obviously intimidated.
Randal responds to the question with, "Hey listen man, I know you're gonna be madder than hell but you have to promise you won't hurt her, otherwise I can't tell you who it was."
Her? It was a girl? That alone is a huge shock. Daryl doesn't know of any girls who have a reason to be angry with him. Shit, he never even talks to any of them except maybe to say "Hi" in the hallway or something. "What're you talkin' about Randal, what girl? I'm not having trouble with any girls and I sure as hell wouldn't ever hurt one. Who the fuck was it?"
Randal looks like he might wet his pants when he answers, "It was that little blond who tutors you in math, Beth Greene."
The news feels like a knife to the heart. He thought him and Beth were friends. She's been his only friend. The only person at school, or anywhere else who he ever even talked to about anything real. She's always been so nice to him, she always acted interested in him and his plans and dreams and ideas. She always had words of encouragement.
Why would Beth make up this terrible lie about him? Did he read the signs all wrong? Could he have misjudged the kind of person she is so badly? Has she just been playing with him for some reason? He can't figure it out, nothing makes sense.
The only way to know is to ask her and he plans to do that the next day. He'll get to the bottom of this bullshit then. Fuck, he's just so damn angry with her, yet all of his anger can't begin to match the hurt and confusion he feels.
His mind is racing a mile a minute while he works it all out. He decides he'll be there waiting when she gets off the bus in the morning. No matter what her reason is for doing what she did, he needs to know why.
In his mind it's settled, but he rides to his place and his plan goes to shit as soon as he opens the door.
Sometime before Daryl arrived at his house the principal called his Dad. He told Will Dixon about the incident at school and why Daryl has been asked to leave for good. Will Dixon couldn't care less that Daryl isn't going to graduate from high school, and he's not at all upset that his younger son would vandalize and steal. Will Dixon is pissed off that the kid didn't share any of his ill-gotten gain.
Daryl barely has a foot in the door when Will Dixon catches him off-guard, throwing a sucker punch that knocks his son to the ground. Things are different now though. It's not like the days when Daryl was in third grade or even seventh grade, or all the years before and since. This time Daryl gets up and begins to fight back.
Even though the old man has 40 lbs on him and a much longer reach, Daryl manages to hold his own as punches and kicks are exchanged. It's when his father grabs a table lamp and slams it hard across Daryl's face that things get especially nasty. Daryl's on the floor and barely conscious, but the old man is still kicking and still throwing punches.
It's then Daryl's older brother Merle walks in the door. Merle has wanted to move his brother out of the old man's house for a long time, and he's finally in a position to offer him a place to stay. He only stopped by to tell Daryl the news, help him gather up his things and get his brother the fuck out of that hell hole for good.
He hadn't planned to walk in on a full-blown fight, but Merle's never been a man to back away from one either. Now all three Dixon men are in the fray and all hell has officially broken loose. It ends when Merle coldcocks the old man with the base of the table lamp. He and Daryl split.
That will be the last time Daryl Dixon ever sees his father and he'll never miss the man.
He's more pissed off than ever now. In one day his whole life has totally gone to shit. He can't go back to school, he's been accused of something he didn't do, shit he can't even try to find a job, not for a while. No one is going to hire a guy who looks like something from a horror movie. Both eyes are black and one is swollen completely shut. His face is a sea of black and blue and there are bloody scrapes and deep cuts everywhere. It'll look worse in the morning.
He doesn't even know what might be broken or bleeding on the inside and Merle wants to take him to the ER. Even though Daryl thinks that's where he needs to go, he has things to do in the morning. He bargains with his brother, "Let's just wait and see how I'm doing in the morning, please Merle."
Merle reluctantly agrees, "Okay, but in the mornin' if I say go, we go. Clear?"
"Clear."
He's so badly hurt, both physically and emotionally, and the only person he has to focus the blame and rage on is Beth Greene. None of this would have happened if she hadn't lied about him.
That's still his mindset when he slips out of Merle's place early the next morning, careful not to wake his brother. He gets to the school long before first light, already impatiently waiting for her bus.
She sees him as soon as she steps off the school bus and immediately rushes to him. She looks frightened and like she's about to burst into tears. Her voice shakes when she asks, "Daryl, oh my gosh! What happened? Who did this to you? Are you alright?"
That's all she has a chance to say before he begins to spew his angry words, "Don't bother playing innocent Beth. Everything that happened is your fault and ya know it. You and your fuckin' lies got me kicked outta school, then my old man beat the shit outta me. Why? I guess I been wrong about you all along. You're nothing but a liar and last night your lies damn near got me killed."
She has no idea what he's talking about or why he's so angry with her. His tone is full of hate, and the hate she hears hurts even more than his words. Still, she cares for him so much and she's devastated by how physically hurt he is. Tears are rolling down her cheeks as she reaches out to touch his arm pleading, "Daryl please…"
He pulls his arm away like her touch is lethal, "Keep your lyin' fuckin' hands offa me!" His heart breaks the instant he says the words.
His anger turns inward, he's a dick and he knows it, but how can he get the words back now? He said them. He doesn't say any more, he runs over to where the old trail bike is parked, gets on and rides off. Leaving Beth Greene crying and wondering what in the world just happened.
He's such a mess when he gets back to Merle's he doesn't argue when his brother insists, "You look like you're gonna keel over any minute kid, we're goin' to the hospital, NOW."
Because of the nature of his injuries the hospital's admittance clerk notifies the sheriff. Daryl doesn't want to tell the deputy his father did this to him. There might be a trial or something and he'd have to see his father when he testified in court. So he tells the deputy he was attacked by a group of guys when he was walking home to his brother's last night. He says he can't identify them, they all wore masks.
Besides, how embarrassing would it be to admit that your own dad hates you so much he'd beat you this badly? Daryl has no doubt the old man would have killed him if Merle hadn't shown up.
Daryl ends up staying in the hospital three days and during those three days he replays everything over and over in his head, starting with the moment he first met Beth Greene. By the time he's discharged he's sure it wasn't her who told the lie.
It takes every ounce of guts he's got to call the farm so he can apologize to her. It's her Daddy who answers the phone and in a stern but controlled voice he says, "Son, you've caused my daughter more than enough hurt for one lifetime. I won't allow you to hurt her again. I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave her be."
The line goes dead and that's that. What's Daryl going to do, show up at the farm and beat on the door demanding to see a 14 year old girl? No. Beth's better off without him anyway.
00
It's been ten years. Ten long years since he last saw Beth Greene. Looking back on that day he remembers it all so clearly, as if it just happened.
Five years ago he learned the truth about who really lied and why. Finding out only added to the pain, anger and anguish he already felt. It reinforced the negative feelings he's had about himself, he was the worst kind of asshole that day.
When he learned the whole truth he made one more attempt to contact Beth, apologize and try to explain himself. Her sister answered and cursed him, warning him to never call there again. The knife went deep when she hissed, "Beth has a good life, she doesn't need you in it. Just leave her alone."
All he could say before she hung up was, "Please, just tell her I said I'm sorry."
He doesn't blame Beth for his pain, how the hell could he? He hurt her and he knows her well enough to know how hard what he said would hit her. He decides not to make another attempt to contact her. If she doesn't want to speak to him he won't push it. He's done enough damage.
It's 10 years later. 10 years after the lie was told and a day like any other day, until Beth Greene walks through the door and back into Daryl's life.
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A/N Thank you for reading and please leave a comment. The chapter photo is on my tumblr blogs gneebee and bethylmethbrick, I hope you check it out. I'll be back with a new chapter next week and we'll learn about Beth, what her reaction to all of this is, and yes, they will see each other. Until then remember, I love ya large! xo gneebee