Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist © Hiromu Arakawa.

"This is someone talking"

'This is someone writing'

"This is someone using sign language"

Part I. Knowledge

Fotset, 1902

Her mother has been in the bathroom for a long time.

Lola thinks about knocking, but pushes the thought away almost instantly. Her mother doesn't like being interrupted unless it's an absolute emergency.

She sits near the radio, listening to one of her shows. One of the main characters is a woman called 'Selah'. A tall Ishvalan woman who the cartoon paints as 'loud' and 'violent', someone who needs to be stopped every episode by an Amestrian man.

(It isn't until years later, when Lola is face to face with a man that has taken everything from her, that she truly realizes how wrong the cartoon actually was.)

Her stomach starts to growl, as she hugs her knees to her chest. Her mother still has not come out.

She hears something fall in the bathroom, the sound of pills scattering across the floor.

Lola doesn't move, even though she feels as if nails are piercing into her stomach, she stays still. Her mother will come out soon, she tells herself.

(Lola knows what has happened, deep down she does. But, she lies to herself anyways.)

I. The Past Always Comes Back To Bite You

Youswell, 1914

A part of her feels as if she's going to die.

She's low on money, her food and water are done for, and any motivation she's had to keep going has withered away.

Her throat burns, her breaths becoming ragged as she slows down, looking for a place to sit.

Her knees drop to the ground, as she leans back against an old building. She reaches for a cigarette, only to realize she's completely out. Having gone through the entire pack on the rather lonely train ride here.

She's in a mining town. She can tell due to all the workers that go about, carrying numerous tools. It's a quiet area, almost no one even notices her as they walk by.

(There are a few military officers standing guard as well, the sight of them making Lola's skin crawl.)

Her red hair is drenched in sweat, her bangs sticking to her forehead as she tries to think of her next move.

(No trains were running at this hour. She was stranded.)

She's starting to think Wagner had given her false information.

"I have a friend in the East," The man had said, lighting a cigarette. "I can't promise anything, but he might have what you're looking for,"

She had taken a risk coming out this far East. It was too close to-

(Golden eyes, bright smiles, automail scattered across the floor.)

Lola pushed those thoughts away.

"Miss?" Someone calls out to her, their voice slightly frantic. "Are you alright? I've been calling out to you for a while now,"

Lola lifted her head, amber eyes squinting as a bearded man stared down at her. A group of people standing behind him.

"Are you a tourist?" Another voice calls out, a young boy popping out from behind the man. They both have the same eyes, Lola notes, as she feels her head begin to swim.

"Kayal," The man says sternly. "Give her some room,"

Lola smiles up at the man, thanking him silently in her head.

Her vision swims, and she can hear the man calling out to her once again as she slumps over.

When she comes to, she's lying in a bed that isn't hers with no idea where her belongings are.

She swings her feet, wondering if she's been kidnapped or if she's simply having a very weird dream.

(She hopes that she's dreaming. She doesn't have many nice dreams anymore. In fact, she doesn't really dream at all.)

The door to her room opens slowly, and a middle aged woman peaks her head in.

"How are you feeling dear?" The woman asks softly.

Lola presses a hand to her throat, as she pushes herself up. She points at her throat, and shakes her head.

The woman tilts her head curiously, as she brings Lola a cup of warm tea.

"Do you have a sore throat?" The woman asks, setting the tea down. Lola simply shakes her head, leaning back once again.

(This was always the hard part-)

She points to her throat once again, and makes an X with two of her fingers. The woman stares at her for a few moments, before realization finally fills her eyes.

"You can't speak," The woman finally says, sitting on the edge of the bed. "That-I'm sorry to hear that. I'm sure you have a lot of things you must want to say."

Lola simply waves a hand at that, taking the tea gratefully.

"My husband was the one that found you," The woman says, standing up finally as she wipes her hands on her apron. "He said you could barely move. Normally we'd charge you for a night here, but we've decided to make an exception,"

The woman smiles at her, and the action is so maternal that Lola almost wants to give her a hug.

"We've gathered your things. Whenever you're ready to get them," She says, as she walks towards the door. "My name is Samantha, by the way. Samantha Halling,"

Lola pursed her lips, something twisting in her chest as she forced a smile onto her face.

She put the cup of tea on the table next to her, and pressed her hands together in gratitude.

"Thank you," She mouthed, hoping the woman would get the message. Mrs. Halling beamed at that.

"Of course,"

She quickly learns that Youswell is a military owned town, owned by some man named First Lieutenant Yoki.

(She hates the military. Hates them with every fiber of her being.)

She sees the man in passing once, with his beady eyes and short stature. He walks past her, his sidekicks giving her dirty looks as she moves out of his way.

The Halling's son, Kayal, is quick to tell her all about him. Eager to vent out his frustration at anyone who will listen.

"He just came here one day," He tells her, as he brings Lola food. "He bribed his way into the army, and bought up the entire town,"

Lola motions around her, before picking up her notepad.

'Does he own this place too?' She writes curiously. Kayal simply nodded his head, his eyes narrowed.

The people in the mining town are kind, they don't expect anything from her. There's a sense of camaraderie that could just be sensed in the air. Not too unlike Barcombe and-

(Stop. Don't think about them.)

When Mrs. Halling tells people about Lola's condition, they don't treat her as if she's diseased or an invalid, they're simply understanding.

She knows she can't stay here forever, but she's grateful for the time she can.

"Lola!" Kayal calls out, all smiles. "Here's your food,"

Lola grins up at him, taking the plate from his hand.

The moment she puts the plate down, Kayal takes the seat across from her.

When the boy didn't have school, or wasn't out playing with friends, he liked to sit with her and find out what life was like outside of Youswell.

"Lola, where'd you come from?" The boy asks curiously, bouncing in his seat, Lola simply shrugs, taking out her notepad.

'Here and there.' She had written down. 'I don't like staying in one place.'

"How old are you?"

'Seventeen,'

"Do you have any family?"

That question causes her to pause, something sick and twisted curling in her stomach. Lola simply shakes her head.

'No,' she writes eventually. 'Not anymore,'

Kayal's face scrunches up for a moment, and he looks like he wants to ask more. But, he decides against it.

She has no way of paying the Halling's back with money, so she ties up her hair and helps out anyway she can around the inn.

She cooks, she cleans, and she learns all the names of the regular customers that stop by.

(It was only for a little while, she wasn't stupid enough to think she could stay. But it felt nice being surrounded by so many people. To be in such a warm environment.)

In Youswell, Lola is a simple girl with no baggage to hold her back. She's quiet and unassuming, and is simply trying to find her way home.

(She feels bad for lying, but it's better if they don't know the truth.)

During the day she helps out around the inn to earn her keep. She treats minor injuries, telling the townspeople that her parents were doctors.

(The only complete truth she's told them.)

At night, she lights a cigarette she nabbed from one of the customers. The smoke soothes her as she looks over her notes, feeling more and more lost by the second.

Dear Seth,

I'm sorry I haven't written to you in a while. I'm currently staying in a town called Youswell. It's to the East, and very isolated. The people here are very kind, they haven't even charged me for staying in their inn. I'm working a few odd jobs to help out, but I plan to leave in about a week or two.

I think it's time for me to come back to Barcombe.

I don't plan to stay permanently, so don't get too excited. But, I want to help out at the clinic again. By the time you get this letter I might already be there, annoying you with random stories.

I haven't been able to make any progress with Wagner's research. I haven't even been able to find any of his old associates. I'm embarrassed to say it, but I'm in the same place I was half a year ago.

I don't know how to help people like my mother. A part of me is tired of trying.

When I'm in Youswell, life is simple. I'm not some freak who can't talk, or the girl who's a bit too good at alchemy for someone her age. I haven't even done any alchemy my entire time here.

That's one of the main things I love about traveling. You have endless opportunities to have a fresh start.

After I come back to Barcombe, I think my next destination will be international. I'd really love to see the way they approach medicine in different countries. Do you still have that cousin who lives in Xing?

Your best friend,

Lola

Dear Win-

I'm sorry-

Please forgive me-

(The letter is crumpled up before Lola can even finish a full sentence.)

It happens a month after she's arrived in Youswell. A hint that she's overstayed her welcome, and should've left the moment she had gotten her things together.

She's serving dinner to some of the townspeople, smiling at their jokes when Kayal comes rushing in.

"Lola!" He calls out, beaming with joy. "We got a piggy bank!"

Lola claps her hands, knowing how rare it was for the inn to get any customers. She wipes her hands on her apron, and walks forward to greet them.

Only to freeze once she sees golden eyes staring up at her.

(He had grown a bit. His shoulders had gotten broader.)

Edward's face turns pale, like he had seen a ghost as the suit of armor behind him-Alphonse, Lola reminds herself- stills.

"Lola?" Al says, his voice sounding so small as it vibrates through the suit of armor. Lola takes a step back.

(She was on the floor, having slipped on blood that wasn't hers. Trying to figure out what she had done to deserve this.)

"Do you know these boys, Lola?" Mrs. Halling asks, looking between them curiously. Lola simply remains frozen.

("I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.")

Lola shakes her head, trying not to flinch as Ed's eyes widen. Whether in anger or shock, Lola can't quite tell.

She smiles at the boys, as if she was greeting two strangers, and simply walks away.

(Why did it have to be them. Of all people?)

She hears Al call out to her, as she rushes to the bathroom. Her stomach lurches, as she empties out last night's dinner.

"You can't keep running away," Wagner had told her the moment she made it west, hoping to forget it all. "The past always comes back to bite you,"

She can hear the brother's voices, as they try to get a room for the night. They sound frantic, as if they were desperately trying to reach for something that had just come within their reach.

(She wondered if they had been looking for her.)

She covers her face with her hands, as she sits against the bathroom door.

("Never leave me, okay Lola," Winry had made her promise, looping their arms together.)

She itches for a cigarette, something to take away the pain and make her feel whole again.

Lola is a coward, this is a fact she has never tried to deny.

(Her mother laid in the bathroom, and she didn't have the courage to open the door until it was too late.)

The past always comes back to bite you. She thinks bitterly, hugging her knees to her chest

Author's Note: So this is my third time rewriting Kairos, hopefully it will be my last. I plan to keep up the old version of Kairos in case anyone wants to read that, but I just want to make a few changes so that I can enjoy writing it again. It's been close to a year since I updated Kairos, and in that time I lost interest in the way things were going with it.

Kairos is going to be a bit more canon compliant now, with a few obvious changes to integrate Lola into the storyline. Lola is no longer a reincarnated soul, but she still has a ton of issues she needs to work through. Kairos is also going to be split into three parts. The three parts will cover the canon storyline, and beyond.

Even though it might not be what some of you were expecting, I hope that you're able to enjoy it anyway and give it a chance.