Author's Note: This is an expanded version of the scene in the car from early Season 2 (which Maddie Bailey very interestingly said was all actor's improvisation). Planning on expanding some show scenes and putting my own spin on them, and then frolicking off into a whole new plot when the time is right, because it's so clear the ship that should really be happening here isn't Kie/Pope, it's JJ/Pope/Kie.

Chapter 1: Freaky In Bed

More waiting. Fucking fantastic.

JJ's fingers trilled along the edge of the Xterra's window and he jerked himself straight. It was hell riding backseat third wheel to the sexual tension between Kie and Pope these days. First, because it made him hard. In an uncomfortable, need to jerk off but not sure why, kind of clammy-sweaty way. And second, just because the two of them couldn't carry a conversation if they had a damn bucket. Reminded JJ too much of high school. Double helpings of awkward all around.

He knew Kie hated awkward as much as he did, so he decided to do them all a public service and break the ice while Pope took care of a little light espionage with Gavin and Kie's Airpods.

"So, in the bedroom is he like kinda freaky because it's Pope, you know?"

Her head jerked with surprise, but she didn't look back at him. "Why are you asking?"

Yeah, he probably should have said that different. Maybe everybody else couldn't tell about Pope, just by looking at him. He put on his best casual-definitely-not-committing-a-crime face and glanced out the window.

"I don't know, kinda curious, just spitballing here."

"You don't need to spitball. We could just sit in silence."

He snorted. "Like we haven't been doing enough of that." And now the tension was even worse than it'd been with Pope in the car, so JJ doubled down to see if he could shake the stick out of Kie's ass. "I mean, between John B and Pope, like, who's better?"

JJ had his theories. He'd liked thinking about sex since back when all his friends still thought girls were icky. He always just thought it was…interesting. It wasn't like drugs or drinking, that you could do at any age. You had to be older for sex, so JJ immediately wanted to be older.

So yeah, he'd always had his theories, but Kie was in a position to actually know. He figured John B would be missionary all the way. Loads of eye contact, sweet kissing, lots of energy to bring to the table but happy with vanilla. Probably too much tongue with the kissing, but in a fun way.

Pope would start out shy, but that boy had a wild side, and if you could get him worked up enough to tip him over the edge…whew! Kie had the fire to do it, JJ was pretty sure. And okay, she'd only kissed the other Pogues, not gone all the way with them, but you could tell a lot just from macking.

She tossed him a disgusted glare, which she did like all the time, so he ignored it. His knee started to jiggle as he glanced toward the house where Pope was supposed to be planting the phone.

He hadn't asked Pope how Kie was. Partially because he wouldn't tell JJ. He'd just blush. But partially because JJ…fuck, he didn't know, just with Pope he was curious. How he'd be. It was hot to think about, especially since it could never happen with him, and JJ had always liked the taboo porn. If you weren't supposed to do it, give it on here, baby. When it was about Kie, though, JJ got a pinchy little twist in the back of his heart, thinking about it. He thought he kinda couldn't handle it, knowing what it would be like with her.

He shrugged. "I mean, blame a guy for being curious but all three of my best friends have made out with each other, how can I not wonder who's the best?"

"Oh my god." She scoffed. "This is exactly what I was worried about."

"What, that all your friends would be super amazing at macking?" He grinned. "I mean, imagine if you even tried me, I'd blow your mind."

He didn't even get a cute little scowl for that, though, and her mouth was pursed up tight.

"Wait, are you actually mad? I was just joking, Kie. Don't you think we all need a little levity in our lives?"

"This is what I didn't want, JJ," she snapped. "I wanted to be a Pogue and now I'm just a girl."

"Uh, I mean if it walks like a duck and it's shaped like a duck…" He gestured the quick curves of an hourglass in the air in front of him.

"Yeah, I'm gonna go wait by the garage," Kie said, reaching for the door handle.

"Hey, hey." JJ jumped up between the seats and grabbed her arm, getting that thrum of adrenaline-panic he did whenever he had to let one of the Pogues out of his sight these days. It took him a second to think of a thing he could say so it wouldn't just be clinging to her arm so she couldn't leave him. "Look, maybe I didn't want you to be just a girl, either."

"What?" She turned, grimacing. "What's that supposed to mean?"

The words had tumbled out before he planned them but now that he thought about it, it did kind of make sense.

"Because then, you pick just one of us. And it's all different. I mean, it's already different, John B's on the lam—" His heart gave that ugly, donkey kick and he resisted the urge to rub his chest. "You and Pope are all I've got left. So if I have to leave you two alone all the time to do couple stuff, then what? I get some Kook friends? All my cousins hang with Barry and that guy will shank me the minute I turn my back on him."

She wrenched her arm away, miffed. "I'm not going to dump all my friends the second I get a boyfriend, JJ."

"No? But what happens when most of your friends were your boyfriends, for a minute? Then you're just a girl, Kie." He sat back, pissed and not even really sure why.

He wanted her to kiss Pope. Wanted to watch, yeah. Wanted it to be him, hell yeah. But he liked that giddy little smile Pope got on when he got him some. He liked the way Pope took off his shirt and flexed his abs all around lately, trying to catch Kie's eye. Long as his friends were happy, he was cool. Usually, anyway.

"That was mean, JJ." And beyond the black glare in her eyes was maybe the tiniest glimmer of tears.

He licked at his lip, poking at the tender place where his last split lip had barely healed. "You said it first."

"Pope's not my boyfriend, anyway," she muttered. "Just because we kissed he doesn't suddenly own me like an oxen or something."

Easy for her to toss out something like that. She had people who claimed her. Family, friends, people who'd line up to be proud to call her theirs. All JJ had was the Pogues, and of those, he knew he was the poorest, the dumbest, and the only one not to be paired up. Not to be picked. He wasn't crying himself to sleep about it, it just was the way it was.

But he hated it when they were mad at him and he hated it even more now that there were only three of them around. So he stuffed down the restless anger he didn't fully understand anyway and leaned forward, putting on his cockiest smirk.

"So what you're saying is, John B is better in bed."

When she groaned and socked him, JJ knew everything was going to be okay. At least for now.

Author's Note: No promises on this fic, peeps, I'm just playing around at this point. But if it all comes together, we'll get a version of S2 with our three favorite Pogues all very, very together.

In the meantime, check out my steamy S1 variation on the Pogue thruple: If Only The Gold.