After mulling over this story line for a few months, it has finally become a reality. Reader beware: this is a Save Benson story. Please heed the rating. This chapter does include rape and small flashbacks of torture. This is my first story, so all feedback is welcome!
Her stomach lurched and her free hand reached for the trash can. She gagged a few times but nothing came up. She felt like she had been hit by a truck. The trash can landed back on the floor with a thud. At least she had one this time.
Olivia rolled her eyes and buried her head into her arm. That's what happens when you spend four months with William Lewis. You become grateful for a trash can. The little things that made life suck just a tiny bit less. Things like a blanket, a bottle of water...an empty roll of duct tape. She looked down and frowned at the thick tape binding her legs. It had been awhile since he ran out of duct tape.
Her eyes scanned across the pale yellow bedroom. Rope and knives laid on top of the gray dresser, cans of 5 Krazy littered the floor, and broken glass glittered in the corner. The room's condition left no doubt that violence had occurred. Olivia closed her eyes as the moments started to play back in her head.
Glowing wire melting her skin. Sharp knives slicing into her like a cheese grater. Hoarse cries filling the room. Metal cutting into her scarred wrists, pain radiating down her arms. The pain was too intense. She needed him to stop. She needed the pain to stop. But it never did.
Olivia cringed at the memories, hating each one of them. She shifted on the bed, trying to find a comfortable spot. She shook her head in an attempt to clear the flashbacks. Maybe she could catch some sleep before he came back.
"Hey sweetheart. Feeling better this morning?"
Olivia felt her heart sink. So much for that idea. She kept her eyes closed, hoping he would leave her alone.
"Time to get up, sweetheart." His tone was flat. "I know you're awake. Don't play me."
Olivia reluctantly opened her sluggish eyes and found Lewis glowering at her.
"You look awful." Lewis looked down at the partially full trash can with disdain.
Olivia started to retort this was his fault - not hers, but the anger in his eyes made her rethink that decision. She had learned to choose her battles, and making Lewis mad when he was clearly already disgruntled would not end well for her.
Lewis moved the trash can and reached for Olivia. "Let's clean you up."
The handcuffs attaching her left wrist to the bed frame rattled as Lewis pulled her to a sitting position. Her arm slowly came to life, pins and needles attacking it from the shoulder down.
Lewis freed her from the bed post and pulled her arms behind her back. Olivia winced as the handcuffs clicked tightly in place.
He kneeled in front of her and brought out his knife. She froze at the cold blade sliding against her skin.
A rip sounded as Lewis sliced the duct tape in half, freeing her legs. She let out a small grunt of pain as Lewis tore it off her bare legs faster than most people rip off a bandaid.
Lewis looked up at her, his eyes seeming to battle between mischief and anger. "Can't very well clean you up like that."
Olivia eyed the knife in his hand. "Maybe you could take the cuffs off, and I could save you the trouble."
Lewis narrowed his eyes. "You know better than that."
Yes. Yes, she did know better. But the idea of Lewis cleaning her up made her anxious to try any alternative.
Lewis pulled Olivia to her feet, holding the knife at her throat. "Don't move." His eyes were hard, his tone leaving no room for argument.
Olivia winced as the knife tore through her baggy shirt. The cold air slid over her like an ice cube. Shame heated her face. Even after all this time, she still felt so humiliated at being stripped.
Lewis scanned her naked body before shoving her towards the bathroom. He pushed her with purpose, firmly closing the bathroom door behind them.
"Get in," Lewis muttered, shoving her into the shower. He fumbled with the faucet, and Olivia suddenly felt a jet of ice water pelt her face.
Sputtering under the water, she glared daggers at him. Lewis frowned at her before focusing back on the faucet.
After a few minutes, the water began to thaw. Lewis straightened, seemingly satisfied with the toasty temperature. "Turn around." Lewis met her tired eyes. "Now."
Olivia studied him. It seemed anger had won this round. She thought about making a run for it but saw he was now holding the gun. How long had he been holding it? She thought he had a knife? The cobwebs in her head made it difficult to think.
Lewis made a growl of impatience and grabbed her arm.
Olivia didn't fight him, there was no point. She closed her eyes against the dizziness as he turned her around. She was so tired. Her eyes blinked open and lowered to her rounding figure. She was starting to show. Her chest tightened as a wave of guilt crashed over her shoulders. She never knew how to feel about this. She gave up on having a baby years ago. To have it come true now, to share that dream with someone so vile as William Lewis was more painful than the physical torture she endured.
Lewis stepped into the shower behind her, snapping her out of her thoughts. Olivia groaned as his bare chest made contact with her back. Not again.
Almost tenderly, Lewis washed her from head to toe. Slowly, the sweat and vomit were wiped away. Olivia noted that dark red also swirled into the drain. Her brow furrowed as she searched her mind for where the blood could be coming from.
She felt his hands on her back. Olivia recoiled at his warm breath tickling her ear. "Junior give you a rough time last night?" Lewis chuckled. "Guess he takes after his daddy."
Her stomach rolled. She wasn't sure if it was the morning sickness or the idea she could have his son inside her. Olivia frowned. Whatever the case, he did have a point. Whether it was a boy or a girl, the baby was taking its toll. Her stomach was on a roller coaster of starvation and nausea. Nothing tasted good. Everything gave her indigestion, and her eyes burned with a lack of sleep.
Lewis ran his fingers through her hair, brushing it to the side. His warm lips grazed her neck. "I can make that up to you." He twisted her around and trapped her in the corner of the shower. He smirked at her anxious expression.
Olivia swallowed hard, not sure what he was planning. He brought his face close to hers, anger returning to his eyes. "One move and I'll get the blowtorch."
The color left her face. Blistered skin, charred flesh, the searing pain, it all came flooding back. She had no desire to experience it again.
Lewis kept one arm against her neck, his eyes never leaving her face. He knew she would behave. The blowtorch was more effective than the gun.
Olivia set her jaw as he explored her body. She could endure this just as she had before. She started counting the blue diamonds on the bathroom wall, trying to distract herself from the hand sliding across her breasts. She bit back a cry of pain as he broke open a healing burn.
Lewis leaned in and kissed her check. His lips moved against her skin before finding her mouth. Olivia was much too exhausted to fight him, and she had no interest in meeting the blowtorch. So when his tongue slid against her lips, she opened her mouth to grant him access.
Just survive. Do what you have to do to survive. She had said it to so many victims. She never dreamed it would be this hard. Never dreamed she would have to live it.
Lewis continued to explore her mouth with his tongue, sliding his free hand down her front. Olivia moaned against him as he reached her core. Everything in her screamed to shove her knee into his groin and run for her life, but a calm voice in her head reasoned she had tried that before. With hands cuffed behind her and no access to the gun, she would lose that fight. If she was going to make it out of this, she had to have her hands. She had to have the gun.
Olivia twisted her head away from his lips, unable to bare this double violation any longer. Her breathing deepened as another moan passed through her clenched teeth. Lewis pulled her closer. "You like that sweetheart?"
"Go to hell!" Olivia tried to twist away from his probing fingers.
Lewis held her firmly in place, his eyes shining in delight. "You do like that."
She started to cry as the sensation deepened. "Please," her voice broke.
"Sh...you're okay baby." Lewis slid two fingers inside her and started stroking.
Olivia's back arched. She closed her eyes and desperately tried to be anywhere but here.
Lewis smiled at Olivia's actions. This was new for him, keeping someone long term. It was an enjoyable challenge. He kicked her wet legs apart, water cascading down his back. She looked miserable. Perfect. He smiled at her panicked eyes. It was amazing she still had fight left, was still frantic at being violated.
Olivia tilted her head back and tried to slip out of his grip, but it was no use. He was too strong. With one hand keeping her in place, his other hand supported his weight against the wall. A slow groan sounded as he entered her.
"Just relax sweetheart. Relax and feel." His excitement was evident. He noticed her face was flushed, her breathing shallow. Lewis slid his hand back down.
Her eyes snapped open as Lewis found his mark. "No," she pleaded.
Lewis looked down at his victim, feeling her buck against him. She must have had a really rough night. The times he had played with her before...she never surrendered this fast. She was close. "That's it. Don't fight it, Detective."
Olivia scrunched her eyes and tried to remember how to breathe. She tried to picture the park at sunset. But the warm tongue caressing her breast made it hard. Sucking, nibbling...why did he have to make this feel so good?
He slowed his movement, waiting a beat before slamming into her again.
"Ah," she cried out at the sensations swirling through her. Olivia's body seemed to have taken over. It was begging for more. It was begging for him to finish. In that moment, she needed something that only Lewis could give. She hated him for it.
Lewis ground against her, and she saw spots. His eyes drank in her conflicted emotions. "Need something sweetheart?"
Olivia bit her lip, the burning ache gnawed at her, begging for attention. She bit down harder. She wasn't going to give him this.
Lewis kept his fingers in place, rubbing in circles. Her whimpers widened his smile. There was a fine line between showing her that he was in charge versus completely breaking her. He liked to dance that line.
He slid out of her and stepped back. He watched her try to hide the disappointment.
"Do you need something?" Lewis repeated.
Olivia swallowed and refused to answer him. She stared at the wall over his shoulder, trying desperately to ignore the burning desire coursing through her.
Lewis clenched his jaw. She was so stubborn. He reached between them and flicked her core. Olivia's eyes rolled, and her body took over. Her mouth opened and words spilled out. She pleaded for him to finish. She was on the edge of the cliff, her body pulsing with need. She just needed it to be over.
His cold eyes sparkled with victory. "That's my girl," he murmured. Pulling her close, he slid back inside.
Olivia cringed in despair as her body met his movement. In that moment, she wanted to be anywhere else. She wanted to go home where she could curl up on the couch. She wanted to be in the squad room joking about Chinese takeout. Instead, she was taking a shower with a serial rapist who should have been behind bars, her body participating in her own rape.
A low whine came from Olivia. He whispered praises into her ear as her body responded. A tear trickled down her face. Her thoughts wondered back to what her life was like four months ago. Back when she had a different life. A life she missed so much.