All characters belong to their respective companies
I know a million people have made these type of things but I'm gonna make it anyways. I hope you are amused by it.
Wally: Hey!
Guess what
Dick: ?
Wally: I got that popcorn kernel out of my teeth finally.
Dick: Wow!
How long that take you? 3 hours.
Wally: Yes.
Dick: Everyday you wake up, you go to work, you put sugar in your coffee
and you watch it disappear into nothingness.
But the sugar doesn't know why
Sugar didn't ask to be born.
Wally: Are you high or sleep deprived?
I honestly can't tell
Dick: Shoot for the moon. If you miss here's a gentle reminder that the moon's diameter is 3475 KM and you could not have f***ed this up more.
Wally: All I ask for is support is that too much to ask for?
Wally: You know how magicians will put their hands in their hats and pull a rabbit out, where do the rabbits come from?
Dick: From the rabbit realm
It goes like this
The hand emerges. It is time. The rabbit must choose a sacrifice.
Wally: Ah. Thanks.
Dick: In Japanese they don't say moon
They say tsuki. Which literally translates to moon
And I think that's how language works
Wally: I'm trying to sleep
Wally: I still think 10 years ago was 1990
Dick: Me too man
Wally: Our relationship with ants is weird.
Dick: How so?
Wally: Ants are all like "Hey I only want these crumbs okay?" and we're all like "You most certainly will not!"
Dick: What class are you in right now?
Wally: English. Can't you tell?
Wally: I'm partially glad I'm not rich.
If I had an infinite supply of money I'd certainly have eaten myself to death on Reese's peanut-butter cups by 14.
Dick: So dying a warrior's death mean nothing to you?
Wally: Is Lebron too scared to guard Kevin Durant.
It's the damn NBA finals.
Dick: Who told you to say that?
Wally: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Dick: Who?!
Wally: I'm watching
Dick: Bulls***
You did NOT formulate that thought.
Wally: I just went into my kitchen and got some juice. I walked back into my room and threw my juice on my bed instead of my phone.
Wally: Name one fragrance commercial that has ever made sense
Dick: What are you talking about?
That all make scents.
Wally: Why did I think asking you would result in anything less.
Dick: Christmas Prank!
I wrap everything in the kitchen in wrapping paper.
What do you think?
Wally: I think Alfred will kill you
And I am not helping you hide from Alfred
Dick: Dude! Yesterday I went to sleep at 6am and woke up at 7pm and thought okay nice 1 hour of sleep before dinner. Then Alfred told me it was yesterday. WTF I slept 25 hours.
Wally: Nice. Now I have a record to beat.
Wally: I have absolutely no idea what size an acer is in real people language.
Dick: 1% the size of the woods where Winnie the Pooh lives
Boom!
Next question
Dick: Thanksgiving and Black Friday are a funny combo.
People go from being thankful to body slamming each other for TVs
Wally: Current Mood- Ryan Evans when he wasn't allowed to sing HumuHumu
Dick: Wow that bad?
Wally: My mom says you're a bad influence.
Dick: She probably right.
Wally: Welcome to my very first vlog in which I try different hair products
*I spray hairspray into my mouth*
Well… My immediate thought is that this one is no bueno.
Dick: I'm not sure what you're implying but I'm in regardless.
Dick: I wish I had an even more vague void than the internet to scream into.
Wally: An abandoned Kmart parking lot just before dawn.
Dick: Jesus I didn't say a whole different dimension.
Dick: Double bubble disco queen headed to the guillotine
Skin as cool as rasputin, russia's greatest love machine
Wally: Boy
You think you know what's happening in this one and then it just knocks you flat doesn't it.
Dick: My biggest pet peeve is being talked to as SOON as I wake up
I hate that crap.
Stop trying to communicate with me
Stop trying to ask me questions
I'm trying to understand the universe all over again don't talk to me yet.
You're gonna confuse me and piss me off
Wally: I'm sorry
The squirrel got stuck in the bird feeder in my backyard and I thought you would like it.
Wally: Hummingbirds- I shall sip the nectar from this flower in a silent ballet.
Dick: Woodpecker- I'MMA STAB THE BUGS OUTTA THIS TREE WITH MY FACE KNIFE!
Wally: I think I figured out why my mom thinks you're a bad influence.
Wally: I sometimes feel offended by American stereotypes but then I remember
We had a nationwide panic when they stopped making Twinkies
Dick: Don't you dare talk bad about Twinkies
Wally: I want to go on a shopping trip where I am the only one in the shopping trip where I am the only one in the shopping mall and everything I want is free
Dick: I believe they call that a robbery
Wally: So be it
Wally: I think Artemis is plotting my death
Dick: Tell her I her wish the best of luck
I'm open for suggestions for future chapters