All the coffee in the world right now wouldn't make her feel anymore awake. Besides, every time she had caught a whiff of someone else's, it took everything in her not to vomit. Jet lag was kicking her ass, and she just generally felt like crap – thanks to this sickness bug she had managed to pick up.
She grabbed her suitcase off the conveyor, her hand going to her stomach as another wave of nausea rolled through her. A slight wince escaped through her clenched teeth as a sharp pain decided to make itself present in her head.
She couldn't wait to get to her bed and curl up under the blankets, sleep this thing off. She lowered her sunglasses over her eyes, glancing around the airport shops to see if there was anywhere selling ginger ale. Ginger ale, quiet, and sleep. That's what would help her though this.
The sun was shining through the glass walls of the airport as she made her way toward the exit for the car park. She stopped suddenly in her steps as she heard her name being called, confusion striking her as she looked around.
Her face softened into a smile as she saw the curly, brown-haired girl waving her arms in the air in front of her. The young girl started running towards her, her father trailing after her in exasperation.
"Mer'dith!" Maddie called again, grinning when she realised Meredith had seen her.
"What are you guys doing here?" Meredith asked, unable to stop grinning despite her illness.
"Really missed you." Maddie mumbled as she wrapped her arms around Meredith's legs.
"Hey." Derek greeted her with a smile. "We figured we'd come and pick you up, take you out for. Breakfast."
"Daddy said we can get pancakes!" Maddie grinned with excitement, her gentle squeeze being a little too much for Meredith, and she swallowed against the small amount of bile that rose in the back of her throat.
"Are you okay?" Derek asked with a slight frown, stepping forward to kiss her cheek and gently rub her arm. He took her suitcase from her.
"Not feeling great." She shook her head a little bit. She crouched carefully, Maddie's arms instantly going around her neck. She returned her hug with a soft laugh. "Hey, I missed you too, Maddie."
"Get pancakes now?" Maddie asked. "Carry?"
"Oh, Maddie, I can't carry you today, I don't feel too good." Her hand rubbed Maddie's back.
"Sick?" Maddie mumbled, burying her face in Meredith's neck.
"Yeah, I think I have a tummy bug." Meredith kissed the side of her head, weirdly feeling better with Maddie in her arms.
Maddie gave her a kiss on the cheek with a soft giggle. "When I'm sick I stay in bed and watch movies and have chicken soup. Daddy, make Mer chicken soup and we can watch movies." Maddie decided all of this with a nod.
"That sounds like an amazing idea." Meredith stood, keeping holding of Maddie's hand, but grabbing Derek's arm to steady herself.
"I've got you." His arm moved around her waist, as she leaned into him slightly. He pressed a kiss to the side of her head.
"I need to lay down." She leaned into him a moment longer.
"Daddy?" Maddie asked, looking up at them.
"Yes, baby girl?" Derek asked.
"Pancakes tomorrow, gots get Mer home."
"Are you sure? I did promise you."
"We can stop and pick up pancakes, Mads." Meredith said, gently squeezing her hand.
"Wanted have pancakes with you, Mer. Go tomorrow." Maddie nodded, before gently pull on her hand. "Let's go!"
"You heard her." Meredith laughed softly, grinning as she let Maddie lead her outside.
Derek stayed close to them, pulling her suitcase along for her and taking her bag off her shoulder. Maddie started chatting away as she tried to catch up Meredith on things that she had missed. She tried to follow, but could feel herself getting progressively worse, and was glad Maddie was okay waiting till tomorrow for pancakes.
Derek got the bags in before helping Maddie get in the car, and she sat in the passenger seat, leaning her head against the cold window. She closed her eyes, taking deep breaths. This was definitely better than waiting for a cab and going back to her empty apartment.
"Sleep." Derek's murmur roused her a little, and he squeezed her thigh gently.
"Hmm." She nodded, settling again.
She woke suddenly with a jolt, not even realising she'd falling asleep. The car had just jerked, Derek cursing slightly under his breath. She grabbed his hand that was still on her thigh.
"Derek. Pull over." She spoke between gritted teeth.
"Shit, sorry." He pulled up the car on the side of the road.
She quickly fell out of the car, balancing herself with her hand against the side of the car as she retched into the grass. The bile burned her throat as she coughed, her stomach lurching a few more times.
She felt Derek's hand rubbing her back before she even realised he had got out of the car and joined her. She leaned into him, groaning slightly.
"I'm sorry, crap." He murmured, his free hand gently pulling her hair back.
"Not your fault, just sick." She shook her head with a whisper.
"Let's get you home." He pressed a kiss against the side of her head.
"Wait, Maddie." Meredith started, pulling herself out of his hold slightly to look into the car.
"She's fast asleep, she was up very early this morning, too excited to sleep because she knew you were coming back today." He let her lean against him again, rubbing her back gently.
"I feel terrible. I've missed her and would've loved getting breakfast with you both." She groaned, her eyes closing as he held her close. "She doesn't need to see me like this."
"I think she's happy just being able to spend time with you, apparently I just don't understand girls." His lips found the top of her head as he laughed softly.
"She's right." She smiled slightly, his words making her feel a little better. "I should be okay now, I just want to go and lie down."
"I missed you, by the way." He pressed a kiss against her cheek.
"I missed you too." Her voice was quiet as he helped her back into the car. "I'd kiss you properly, but I taste like vomit."
"As soon as you brush your teeth, I'll kiss you as much as you like." He grinned, kissing her cheek again before closing her door.
He quickly slid into his own seat, starting the engine again. "I promise there'll be at least two kisses."
"Maybe even three?" He smirked slightly, resting his hand on her thigh again. "Try to get some more sleep."
"Okay."
She glanced back to Maddie, fast asleep in her car seat and cuddling the teddy Meredith had given her a few months ago. She leant against the window again, allowing the cool glass to settle the fever she felt rising up. She let herself drift off to sleep.
The next time she woke up, she was confused. Beyond confused. She wasn't in the car anymore. Wherever she was, it was comfy, and she could feel the weight of a blanket covering her. She heard the mixture of a soft noise from the tv and a quiet giggled beside her as she came to, blinking a few times. She groaned softly as the awful taste in her mouth.
She quickly realised she was lay on Derek's L-shaped couch, a smile immediately growing on heer lips at the sight in front of her. Maddie sat in Derek's lap, giggling at her favourite cartoon playing on the tv.
She closed her eyes again, taking a few deep breaths as she mustered up the energy to pull herself up. She needed water, and to brush her teeth, but she could tell she was shaking slightly from the weakness in her body.
She let out a final, audible breath, before opening her eyes again, using her hands against the cushion beneath her to push herself into a sitting position against the pillows.
"Hey, take it easy." She heard Derek moving closer and turned to look at him. "What do you need?"
"Water." Her voice came out as a croak, scratching the inside of her throat. She covered her mouth as she coughed a little. "Maybe a toothbrush."
"Here." He passed her a glass of water off the coffee table that he must've got ready earlier. She took it from him, taking small sips as his fingers brushed hair out of her face. "Feeling better?"
"Less nauseous." She nodded a little, still taking sips. "Still tired, but I feel gross."
"You can take a bath or have a shower if you want." He offered, taking the now half empty glass of water.
"Maybe later, I just need to brush my teeth and change my clothes for now." She gave him a small smile, looking over his shoulder to Maddie, sitting quietly as she watched them both. "Come here, bug."
Maddie crawled over Derek to be closer to Meredith's side, hesitating slightly. Maddie glanced up at Derek who only frowned slightly in confusion.
"What's wrong, Mads?" Meredith frowned as well, brushing her fingers over her Maddie's curls.
"Being good because you're sick." Maddie said with a nod.
"Do I get a cuddle if you're being good? I missed my favourite girl." Meredith held her arm out for Maddie to cuddle into her side.
"Daddy said had to let you sleep." Maddie curled into Meredith's side, and Meredith held her close.
"Well, I'm awake now, so we can cuddle and rest together." Meredith smiled wider as Maddie nodded. "Let me go get changed, and then we can watch some movies together."
"Why don't we all put our pyjamas on?" Derek suggested, a light air to his tone. Meredith met his eyes, seeing the joy in them as he watched her with Maddie.
"Jama day!" Maddie nodded, pressing a kiss to Meredith's cheek. "Go get my jamas and be back."
"Okay." Meredith laughed softly as Maddie climbed off the couch and rushed off.
She groaned slightly as she tried to get herself up off the couch, and Derek moved closer, his arm going around her middle. "Let me help."
She leaned against him for support, finding comfort in his warmth. He pressed a kiss against the side of her head, and she smiled softly.
"Your suitcase is on the bed, but I also washed your favourite hoodie of mine, it's waiting for you."
"Hmm, thank you." She turned her head to press a kiss to his cheek.
"Go and brush your teeth so I can kiss you properly." Derek chuckled, returning a kiss to her cheek. "Yell if you need me."
Her head was still pounding slightly as she made her way to his bedroom, but she couldn't help but notice the blinds had been drawn closed across the house to keep out the rarely bright Seattle sun. She made it to the bedroom, opting to go and brush her teeth before getting changed, not wanting the horrible taste to make her vomit again.
Once her teeth had been brushed, she quickly stripped herself of the clothes, catching the display of Derek's alarm clock. It showed that it was two in the afternoon and given her flight had landed at half eight that morning, she'd slept away the majority of the day. She could definitely sleep some more, though. She dug out her pyjamas bottoms from the suitcase, pulling on Derek's Bowdoin hoodie. She pulled her hair up out of the way into a loose bun.
She slowly made her way back into the living room, pausing at the bottom of the stairs to catch her breath. Derek appeared, walking towards her and sliding his arms around her waist. He gently pulled her closer to him, making her smile and feel better, even if only for a moment. Apparently, he was also joining in on pyjamas day, and she vaguely wondered when and where he had changed into them.
He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "You look much comfier."
"I definitely feel more human." Her arms slipped around his neck.
"Good." His lips lowered to hers a moment, capturing them in a short, but meaningful kiss. "I missed you."
"I missed you too." She pressed another kiss to his lips for a short moment. "Is Maddie back down?"
"She's waiting for you on the couch." He chuckled.
"I shouldn't keep her waiting." Meredith said with a soft laugh but not making any effort to move from her positions just yet.
"One second, I believe I was promised three kisses." Derek grinned softly, lifting one hand to cup her cheek.
"We said maybe." A small smirk flashed across her lips, raising an eyebrow.
"Hm, you're definitely feeling better." He chuckled, shaking his head a little before pressing his lips to hers again, for slightly longer this time.
She returned his kiss, one hand sliding into his curls and tangling them there a moment as her lips parted on his. His arm around her waist brought her closer to him for a moment, only for them to be interrupted by Maddie shouting for Meredith. Their lips parted, the two of them breathing a little heavier.
"We can finish that later." Her voice was a whisper, placing a soft peck on his lips before pulling out of his hold. She made her way to the living room. "You shouted, Maddie?"
"Cuddle time, Mer. Have tell you things." Maddie look up at her, dressed in her favourite oink onesie and already under the blanket.
"What kind of things?" Meredith asked.
She took up residence in the corner of the couch again, pulling Maddie and her blanket into her lap, pulling another blanket over them.
"You were gone for a whole week." Maddie leant her head back against Meredith's chest with a dramatic groan, as if it was the worst thing imaginable. "Lots happened."
"What did I miss?" Meredith asked, her fingers running through Maddie's hair. It had definitely grown over the past week she was away. She was sure Maddie had grown herself.
"Hmm." Maddie's face contorted into a from as she thought hard. "Daddy said I go school soon."
"And what do you think about that?" Meredith spoke in a quiet voice, vaguely wondering where Derek had gone.
"No school." Maddie muttered, turning her face to hide against Meredith's chest.
"Why not? I think you'll love school."
"Cause Daddy said not at 'opital no more, and no lunch time with you and Daddy, and won't see you." Maddie trailed off with a huff, her arms moving around Meredith's neck.
Meredith grinned softly, moving her arms around Maddie and hugging her close. "I know we won't have lunch together all the time anymore, but you'll still see me, I'm not going anywhere."
"Nuh uh." Maddie shook her head in defiance. "Always see at 'opital."
"Are we at the hospital now?" Meredith raised an eyebrow.
"No." Maddie frowned.
"Can you see me?"
"Yeah." Maddie giggled.
"And you'll still see me if you go to school. We can have lunch together at weekends, and sometimes there's no school because of holidays. I think you'll love school."
"Really?" Maddie's eyebrows rose, a grin on her face.
"Yep, you'll learn lots of new things, and you'll make lots of new friends, and you'll have loads of fun."
"But you're my best friend." Maddie sighed, tightening her arms around Meredith's neck again.
"You're my best friend, too." Meredith reassured her, rubbing her back. "But it's okay to have more friends."
"If you say so." Maddie sighed again.
"We have all summer before you start school anyway, we can have lots of fun before then and lots of lunches together, okay?"
"Okay!" Maddie smiled again, nodding eagerly.
"Now, where did Daddy go?" She directed the question at Maddie, but was answered by Derek.
"I'm right here." She turned to see him leaning against the doorframe.
"I think it's time to have some lunch." She grinned softly at him.
"Are you sure you feel okay to eat?" He moved toward her, running his hand over the back of her head.
"Yeah, maybe some toast?" She asked.
"Okay." He smiled and leaned down to kiss her forehead. "What do you want Maddie?"
"Toast!" She giggled as he kissed her forehead too.
"Of course." He chuckled, mussing up her hair.
She waved him away with her hands. "Go Daddy, speaking to Mer. Secret girl talk."
"Okay." He rose an eyebrow, backing away. "You girls carry on; I'll go make lunch."
He left the room, chuckling to himself, and Meredith turned back to Maddie, curious. "What secret, Mads?"
"Feel sad." Maddie sighed, laying on top of Meredith.
"Why's that, bug?" She frowned, gently rubbing Maddie's back.
"Everyone at day care has mommy to see them. Don't have mommy." She sighed, rubbing at her eyes. "Mommy doesn't want me."
"Come here." Meredith said, holding Maddie closer against her. "Lots of people love you, and want you. You are the prettiest, smartest, most amazing little girl I know. Daddy loves you very very much, and nana and grandpa. And I love you, little bug. And you raunties, and unvles, and cousins all love you. You have lots and lots of people who love you and want you."
"Daddy said that."
"Daddy is always right, isn't he?"
"Daddy smart." Maddie nodded, still seeming down.
"He definitely is." Meredith sighed, pressing a kiss against the top of her head. "I know you're feeling sad, and it's okay to be sad. Your mommy made a bad choice, and that has hurt you. It wasn't your fault, okay? And I know that your daddy loves you so so much."
Maddie sighed, seeming to contemplate her words as she snuggled against her. Her voice was quiet and reserved when she spoke again, lifting her head. "Still sick?"
"A little bit, but your cuddles are making me feel much better."
"Cuddles make me feel better too." Maddie nodded, smiling again.
They lay in silence then, waiting for Derek to finish making lunch. Her hand absentmindedly rubbed up and down Maddie's back gently. Her heart hurt for the young girl, knowing somewhat the position she was in. She wished she'd had someone to talk to when she was younger, and she was glad she could be that person for Maddie.
Even just this small talk with Maddie made her feel important and needed. She needed to start re-evaluating how she lived her life. People needed her here. Not just Maddie, but Derek. And her own mother seemed to have been missing her more these days. She just didn't know how to change, and she didn't want to force herself into it when she might not be ready yet.