Naofumi awakens to nothing. Nothing but darkness. Profound darkness. The stillness in the air is strangely comforting. Nothing here can hurt him.
In fact, he doesn't feel much.
Is this what death feels like? To not feel or see anything but black?
No. This isn't death.
Memories start flooding back. The manor. Ajax. People calling his name. What he remembers most is the pure, unadulterated anger. The kind you save only when you're at your lowest.
He remembers killing Ajax.
Now he's starting to feel something. Regret. Not just for what he did, but for everything. It wasn't his fault he was summoned here. It wasn't his fault the shield came with nothing but stigma. Nothing was his fault yet he believes it.
Why? Why is he here? Why does he have to go through this? If he were back home, none of this would've happened. He would be playing his video games, talking with his online friends, going to class, hanging out with his brother.
It wasn't the best life. Uneventful, maybe, but it wasn't bad. He had his family with him. Here, he has nothing.
He misses it. Everything about his old life.
Was any of this worth it? Is being a hero worth anything at all? What does he get out of this? What does killing someone get him?
He has many questions but no one is here to answer him.
So, he walks. Strangely, he could see his body. A speck of green in the blackness.
He continues, not sure where he's going. There's no ground beneath him yet he's walking on an invisible path.
How long has he been walking? A few minutes? An eternity? He doesn't know.
Then, he sees it.
A glimmer. It was a faint green glimmer barely visible. He starts running. Hope surges in him.
The glimmer became brighter and brighter as he got closer. When it was at its brightest, he stopped. There, floating in the ever darkness, was his shield.
"What the…" Naofumi realized he hadn't spoken since he woke up here. His voice startles him.
He takes a step closer until he's within arm's reach of the shield.
"Bearer of the Shield," the shield spoke.
Naofumi's breath hitches. When his shield spoke while fighting Ajax, it sounded like a man. A single person. This time, he could make out multiple voices speaking at the same time. Four, he guessed. Two men and two women. The voices had a different tone yet each voice flowed well into one another.
"You have endured hardship upon your arrival," his shield continues. "You were selected to steer this world to safety. Yet there are those who wish to see you fail. But along the way, you persevered. No matter the impediment, you fought.
"Hear us, we have watched this world since its birth. Fire, ice, wind, lightning, water, earth, light, and dark has nurtured the land. Fire burns yet ignite the flames of hope within people. Ice freezes yet refresh the hottest of temper. Wind roars yet sighs gentle gales. Lightning collides yet sparks life. Water drowns yet nourishes the driest of lands. Earth destroys yet creates mountains. Light blinds yet illuminate a path. Dark banishes yet soothes weary spirits. For every life granted to this world, there exists something to destroy. It is the equilibrium of life that you must live. To push forward and forge your own path.
"But even now, your heart wavers. Why, Bearer of the Shield, is your heart under duress?"
"Me?" Naofumi asks.
"Yes, you. We would like to hear your words. From within the storm of your heart. Answer us, Bearer of the Shield."
It all came rushing back. The feelings he has held onto. The words that would not escape his lips.
"You know why." Naofumi shoots back, not bothering to hide his anger. "You've seen everything since you're attached to me all the time. Why ask something if you already know the answer? What's even the point?!"
"Because while we watch, we do not know the extent of your heart. Or of your soul. Speak freely, child."
In that case…
"I'm fucking pissed. I'm pissed because from day one nothing has been going right from me. I got framed by some heartless bitch! Everywhere I go people are sneering at me. I'm stuck with three idiots who still think this is all a game. My friends nearly got killed by some psycho! And to top it all off, I have to protect this world from being run down by these stupid Waves!"
The more he spoke, the more his anger spiked.
"What the hell did I do to deserve any of this!? I didn't ask to be a hero. I'd rather have my old life than have to deal with any of this! I'll take a boring life over this! At least in my world, I could find happiness."
He was breathing heavily now.
"Your anger is apparent," the Shield says. "You are allowed to feel this way. No one would fault you for it. The life you had lived before, though mundane, provided a sense of safety and windfall. You were summoned here against your will. You did not ask for this yet you took on the mantle of a hero."
Naofumi scoffs. "Yeah, well. Not like I had a choice in this."
"But you did. Many times, you have had the opportunity to turn your back against the world. Even now, nothing is stopping you from leaving all of this behind. But here you are. Why is that?"
"Because…"
Because…
"Bearer of the Shield. It's clear you do not know the answer. There is no need to rush forward blindly. In fact, we would like to give you an opportunity."
"…what opportunity?" Naofumi didn't want to trust these voices. What if this was all a trick?"
Suddenly, a light shone brightly behind him. Cautiously, Naofumi turned to the light and he gasped.
The light was a portal. And in the portal was the library he was in.
"Is this?" Naofumi rushes to the portal. Through it, he could see the bookshelves, tables, and people. Notably, the people were frozen. Some mid-step, some reaching for a book. He was so close to the portal he could practically smell the scent of books.
"It is indeed," the Shield says. "You were summoned here with magic used by humans. We, on the other hand, have always had the power to summon the Heroes and send them back to their homeland. Your summoning was done intentionally to cause chaos. Not for the sake of the people. If you wish, you can go back home. All you have to do is step through the portal. We will summon someone else to become the Bearer of the Shield."
"You're being honest, right?" This sounds too good to be true and Naofumi knows it. "No tricks? I won't die if I go through?"
"Nothing of the sort. Your clothes will transform back to what you had been wearing. As for your memories of this world, they will be forgotten.:
This made his breath hitch. "What?"
"Your memories. Killing someone, even in self-defense, will haunt you forever. Your dreams will be a constant reminder of the man you have killed. Should you go through, that memory along with everything else will be erased from your mind."
"Even my friends?"
"Even them. Now, take your time and choose wisely. Your decision will shape what life you wish to live. A life of mundane safety, or a life with constant danger."
This was insane. None of this made any sense to Naofumi. One second, he had killed someone and the next he was in this empty hellscape with a way back home.
Home.
He looked back at the portal. It was only a few paces ahead. All he had to do was take a few steps and he would be back home. He would get to be with his parents and his brother. He will go back to attending his college courses while playing video games and reading graphic novels and manga. He would never have to worry about saving a world from monsters.
A thought crosses through his mind. He never took into consideration how easy he had it. What did he really have to worry about? Getting good grades, keeping his brother on the right track, finding a job after he graduates, maybe getting a girlfriend. All those things he had worried about, thinking if he hadn't done any of them, his life would spiral. But he had time to figure things out.
His friends, however, didn't.
If he left, he would be leaving behind everyone. Rachel would have to off by herself to find those guys who are spreading diseases. Mina would continue to search for her parents. And Rowan would continue to find Gareth. Did they really need him to do all that?
He couldn't fight back like Ren, Itsuki, or Motoyasu. What skills his Shield had were minimal. He had done nothing but let his friends fight his battles for him. And for what? Nearly getting them killed by Ajax?
He wasn't a hero.
He was just Naofumi. A shut-in otaku with nothing going on in his life.
But was that a bad thing?
He remembered clearly how excited he was on the first day in this new world. Then things went south and he was alone.
Then he met Rachel. Someone who conned nobles out of their money. She was also kind to the sick and went above and beyond to help them.
Then came Mina. A beautiful dancer who moved gracefully with each step. She wants nothing more than to be reunited with her family.
And Rowan. A shy hunter who can control spiders. He wants to find the man who taught him to be brave in the face of danger.
They were more than capable of handling themselves against any kind of danger without him.
But he remembers saving Rachel from the Cerberus. Promising Mina to help find her parents. Letting Rowan join them so he wouldn't have to go alone. From then on, they bonded in a way Naofumi hadn't felt with his online friends.
They depended on him in ways he never thought anyone would.
He couldn't leave them behind.
Not just them, but other people too. The medicine shop guy and the magic shop lady, Tomas and Tabitha. He saved their relatives from the Wave invasion in Lute. There was also Elhart. He took him in when no one else would. There would be countless people who would come to rely on not just him, but his friends. Who knows, maybe more people will join his party. He could be the hero the people need.
And yet…
If he went back to them, he'd be leaving behind his family. If what he saw through the portal was true, then time was frozen. If he had stepped through, everything will resume as if nothing had happened. He would go home with no recollection of meeting his friends and killing Ajax. It would just be any ordinary day.
In one world, there was his family and ordinary life. In the other were his friends and constant danger. Heroes weren't invincible. They could die just like any other person. And if he did, what then? Would time in his world continue? Would he cease to exist and no one would remember him?
So many outcomes. Only two options.
He takes a deep breath.
Naofumi knows which one he would choose.
Turning his back to the portal, he approaches the Shield. He reaches out slowly.
'Mom, dad, Akito… I'm sorry. But they need me more.'
When his hand touches the shield, a ripple of light shot through the gem at the center.
He looks behind him and sees the portal shrinking.
"I'll come back," Naofumi promises. "I will. Just be patient."
The portal grew smaller and smaller until it disappeared completely.
"So, you have chosen."
Naofumi turns his attention back to the Shield.
"Violence… Lies… Cruelty… You will encounter these imperfections of a world that is still unknown to you. You have forgone a simple life. Instead, you surrendered yourself to a harder path.
"You may not claim to be the hero you say you are and yet you still wish to lend succor to your allies."
"Let's be clear on one thing," Naofumi interrupts. "I'm doing this because I made a promise to them. They matter to me just as my family. But I'd be a shitty person if I had left them behind. Sure, I would've forgotten them had I gone back home, but they wouldn't."
Naofumi could imagine the hurt in their eyes. They'd be sad, angry even.
"I can't leave. Not after we've been through so much. What you just said right now, about their world being filled with violence, lies, and cruelty. That's only a fraction of what else there is. There's pace, truth, compassion, and hope. Neither can exist without the other.
"Even if I'm branded as a monster, I'll still fight. Come hell or high water, nothing is going to stop me this time. And when I'm done, I'll go back home. So there." He finishes his words with such finality.
"Very well, Bearer of the Shield. You are brave to face so much danger. There's only one word to describe you now: a hero."
The Shield began to glow brighter, the light becoming blinding.
"Now go. Return to your friends. Return to the world that still needs you. Be the hero they need."
Light exploded from the shield, filling the empty, dark void hellscape with light.
His body began to grow heavy, his vision blurry.
He was going back to them.
This is the path he chose. And he won't regret it.