AN: I've had some asks about Ray of Sunshine updates. I'll be updating it soon, hopefully, this month. If you haven't heard already, I'll be pulling back from fanfiction at the end of April. I want to focus entirely on OGs. This means I'll be shutting down my paid fanfiction site and that I'll be posting all those stories on here if I have no intentions of turning them into an original. If you go to my author page here, you'll notice some stories are gone. Because this site is notorious for theft and the ones I removed, I want to make them into originals. I apologize for any inconvenience; I won't post them again.

Wishing you all the best and enjoy!

Chapter Two

Tuxie had to be upset with me. I did call him out in the middle of the night for a pep talk. It was more than that; I wanted to make sure he was okay. But I didn't say that, and after I was back to normal, he rushed away with a strange look on his face. It was like he was hiding too, keeping his head down while I tried to look him in the eyes.

Needing someone to keep me from a complete breakdown was nothing new, but I guess I had pushed things too far when I used Tuxie. He had his own life, and I intruded on it. What was I thinking? I'd abused my powers and our connection, even talking the Senshi into staying back all so I could meet with him. Someone should take my henshin away.

None of that mattered (for now) as I stood behind the counter, waiting for Mamoru to show up. Just thinking about him and his eyes was enough to remove all other thoughts and concerns.

Would he come early? So that we had more time together? Or would he come around the same time and walk me home? Minako was working with me today, so Haruka wouldn't come at the end of my shift like yesterday. And Minako was far more…understanding. I was sure I could get her to leave me alone with Mamoru. Unlike any of the other Senshi, hell-bent on protecting me when I didn't need it.

My heart was in my ribs as I waited. Each ring of the bell from the front door was like a ding from my communicator. As the day wore on, my heart jumped less and less. And it was impossible to hide my disappointment when one of those 'dings' came from Seiya instead.

"Hey, Usa!" He said so cheerily that it only made me feel worse. Then his smile dropped, "everything alright?"

And now I struggled because I wasn't sure I should tell Seiya the truth. "Um…yeah. It's been a…rough day."

"Is someone giving you a hard time?" Seiya asked, looking around for a culprit.

"A little bit," was the first truth I'd told to him. "But they left already."

"I see," Seiya calmed and then leaned against the counter in front of me, "are you free tonight?"

"Tonight?"

My heart raced in my chest. It was different from how it felt when Mamoru made it run. It didn't use to do this. Not around Seiya. However, now that I'd met Mamoru Seiya's advances (even though still unwanted from the start) felt…wrong. Anything that wasn't Mamoru didn't sit right in my chest now. And that included his current lack of presence. It forced me to go along with whatever Seiya had planned since I couldn't tell him about a man I'd just met. It sounded crazy because it was!

"Yeah, tonight? Haruka wants us to all go out together."

At least Seiya's lie made me feel better about my own. Haruka had already told me that it was Seiya's idea. "It's…a bit last minute. I didn't bring a change of clothes…."

"you can wear what you have on now! You look beautiful in everything you wear!" My level of discomfort rose, and Seiya picked up on it. "Or you can…go home and change? I can pick you up there?"

"No!" The last thing I needed was my parents getting the wrong idea. "We can…meet here. It'll be easier since this place is downtown. No back and forth."

My explanation seemed to work, Seiya softly grinning. "Sounds good. I'll come back later. Is six good?"

I nodded, and Seiya left. Once he was visible in the large bay window, I breathed easier. There was something to Seiya that I couldn't say no to. Was it his charm or feeling indebted to him? It was him and the Starlights that stayed by my side until the end. And that created a bond between us, but more like the connection I have with the Senshi. It wasn't romantic for me, but it was for Seiya.

The truth was, I didn't know how to stop Seiya's feelings, and I never wanted to hurt him.

This left me stuck, and I honestly didn't know if it was better to leave it alone or clarify my feelings. It wasn't that I hadn't tried either; I had told Seiya that I didn't think of him that way before Galaxia and Chaos. He responded, "give me a chance to make you see me as a man", which I couldn't deny. After all, I did view him as a combination of sister and brother. And I had thought if he changed my mind, then I would love him the way he did me.

However, that was before I met Mamoru.

By the end of my shift, Mamoru was still a no-show. I didn't have anything to go on other than that; Mamoru didn't come. Worry bloomed in my belly. Fear that he was hurt somewhere or not as interested as I thought. Both had me a wreck, twisting my fingers until they were numb at my belly. While my heart created decent reasons why Mamoru didn't show, my mind sheltered me with the reality. My heart said he was busy, and my head said he didn't want me.

Going out tonight was a good thing in the end. It would distract me…I hoped. I had to focus on the people in my life and not the ones who missed the boat.

Minako stood at my side as I gathered my things. She would walk me home, but now it didn't matter. "What's wrong?" I shook my head, not up for talking, "oh, I see, you're in love." I gaped at her, and she frowned, "I'm the Senshi of Love!"

"Yeah, but you're not right now! You're just Mina!"

She wrapped an arm around me, grabbing my waist. "I still know you, Usa. You've been sighing all day and agreeing to dates with Seiya!"

"It's one date, and Haruka and Michiru will be there!"

Minako stopped, pulling me to a halt with her. "You're being mean, Usagi-chan. Seiya loves you, and you're in love with someone else!"

"I'm not in lov…." I stopped because I couldn't lie, "I promised Seiya that I'd give him a chance. That's all I'm doing. And he'll never give up until I do. What else can I do, Mina?!"

She continued to frown as she thought but then grabbed my arm, spun me to face forward, and continued our journey home. "You're right; you have to make him understand. Hate to say it, but you're going to have to break Seiya's heart.

"I…can't…."

"Maybe the guy you're in love with can help you?"

I slumped, feeling more beaten than in battle, "he's not…in love with me. I thought he was…he's not an opinion, and I don't want to do that anyway."

Minako was silent as I swallowed my heart back into my chest. Then shrugged, "we'll see."

oOo

I rolled from one end of my apartment and back. My place wasn't large by any means, but since I'd been doing this for a few hours now, I was pretty stiff. I suppose this could count as my physical therapy for my arms. There was no focus, not on the ache in my biceps or the tingling in my toes from my time as Tux last night. All I could think about was Usagi's face.

No matter how hard I tried, her every curve lined up with Sailor Moon's. The slight dip above her upper lip and the round plumpness of the lower one, the tiny freckles that brushed her nose, and the dark lashes that framed her eyes. It all matched.

Speaking of eyes, Usagi's (or Sailor Moon's) were a stunning color for Japan. They were rare; not many had bright blue irises on this continent. But it did happen, so I couldn't go off that alone. Blonde hair with blue eyes was even rarer, and I still wanted to find a reason that they weren't the same person. It didn't make sense, but I didn't want them to be one and the same.

It was because it was Usagi. She was sweet and kind and beautiful; the thought of her struggling the last year without me made it all hurt more. Usagi was someone who deserved to be happy and get everything she desired.

The revelation that Usagi was Sailor Moon also made it harder to believe she would ever want me.

I think that was the worst part. Why would someone like Usagi want half of a person like me? I was less than half; my legs, brain, and history were missing pieces. Being an orphan was something you could hide up until you were serious about a person. But my wheelchair was out for all to see. And Usagi had been the first person to look at me and not the chair.

"Dammit!" I yelled to my walls; why did everything have to be so hard?

Glancing at the clock, I noticed that the numbers blurred. I hadn't eaten anything today and spent it pacing. It still told me that I was late for my visit to Usagi's café. More than anything, I wanted to see her. My heart ached for it. But fear stopped me. What if she recognized me as I had her? We knew one another now; it was why her glamour didn't work. We met in real life for the first time, and as soon as we got together in our other forms, I could see Usagi in the fuku. It was the only thing that made sense. It meant that when she got a good look at me, Usagi would recognize me as well.

Would it be the next time we met? If I went to her café, would she see the similarities? Or would I have to wait until I was Tux again for her to see past my glamour?

Forcing my eyes to focus, I could see that it didn't matter what I thought since Usagi's shift was long over by now. I had missed her.

It must have been the food deprivation since I found myself wheeling towards the café without remembering anymore of my journey. I didn't even remember leaving my apartment. I hope I locked the door…

This was stupid. Yesterday I was here late afternoon, and Usagi's shift ended while I was with her. I didn't check the time, but the sun was shining brightly. It was setting behind me now; there was no way she was still here.

Staring at the door like it was my enemy and blaming everything under the sun (including myself), I forced myself to turn around. Home, I would go home and try again tomorrow.

But as soon as I faced the right way, a figure blocked my path. She was far from the only person there on the busy streets, yet it was like we were alone. Usagi gripped the thin strand of her purse tightly and gaped down at me. "Mamoru?"

The breath I'd held at the sight of her released at the sound of my name. I played it off as best as I could, "Hey…sorry I'm late."

The sun setting behind her darkened most of Usagi from my sights. It made it impossible to see her face and know if she was angry. But she revealed it to me with a few short steps, standing closer with her eyes locked on mine. "No, no, it's alright. You're here now!"

Usagi smiled through the tears that glimmered in her cerulean pools. She was…really happy to see me, just like last night when Sailor Moon flew into my arms. I wanted to hold Usagi now, wishing for the first time in a long time that my legs worked. I would have already wrapped my arms around her if I were standing.

Usagi blinked out a few tears but didn't wipe them away. She either didn't notice them or didn't care. I didn't know why I liked it; maybe because it allowed me to be the one to do it, reaching up to brush them off her warm cheeks. Before I could pull away, she grabbed my wrist. The next thing I knew, Usagi hugged my hand to her face. I didn't tug or try to escape. There were hundreds of people around, and I didn't give a damn. This was the only way I could hold Usagi as Mamoru, and like hell, I was going to stop.

"Usa?"

Usagi pulled away but didn't drop my hand. I gripped her fingers just in case, not wanting to let go. She still lowered our appendages, our hands slapping against her thigh. Usagi was looking at someone behind me, so I turned as much as possible to look. It was the guy from the other day, the one I mistook for her boyfriend. And he still managed to look like Usagi's boyfriend, glaring hard at our clasped hands.

The women from yesterday came up behind the man; Haruka threatened me with her eyes again. "You ready to go, Kitten?"

I chuckled at the irritated look Michiru wore. It only made the two threatening me glower deeper. Usagi's hold tightened, and I gave her my full attention, the others fading away in the background. It was her eyes, I swear; the pools of crystal blue had me diving into them and creating a world of white noise. The only clear thing was her voice.

"Would you…like to come with us?"

There was so much hope in her tone that it made my heart dance. I could feel the tingle in my legs, too, like when I was Tuxedo Kamen. But Usagi was Sailor Moon, the only woman to make me walk, so of course, my toes would tap for her now.

I opened my mouth to answer, but our bubble popped with a loud, disgruntled voice. "Usa, it's supposed to be just us tonight!"

Usagi's not-boyfriend was whining like a toddler. It was a good thing I was used to no one wanting me around. The thought of Usagi feeling the same did hurt more than any other dismissal had before.

My fingers slipped from hers, and I grabbed my wheels to leave. But Usagi…she put her hands on my knees to stop me in my tracks. "No, Seiya, it's supposed to be friends tonight. And Mamoru is my friend!" She looked back at me, our faces inches from one another, and blushed but didn't distance herself. "Plus…he looks hungry. Did you eat today, Mamoru?"

Without a mirror, I knew my face matched Usagi's, feeling the burn on my cheeks. I guess that meant I was embarrassed, but I didn't want the feeling to go away. I didn't want Usagi to go away because I knew that I'd never feel this way about someone else. I'd never felt this way before, so my theory was sound.

I didn't know if I answered her, shook my head or something, but she smiled softly at me. It made her irises twinkle. "Why don't you have dinner with us?"

The pout on Seiya's face could have been seen from space. And Haruka didn't lighten up on the questions all night. But I didn't care, Usagi's eyes stayed on me for most of the night, and her smile was mine too. I could have been offered a million dollars to go away, and my decision still wouldn't have changed. Something that was a possibility as Seiya introduced himself to me.

"You know who I am, right?" I shook my head and snuck a glance at Usagi, who still wore a flushed face. "I'm the lead in a very popular singing group…."

"Oh, I don't keep up with pop culture," I mumbled, hoping it was the end of the conversation.

Seiya huffed and sat back, "of course you don't. Who would want to listen to music when you can't…."

I was used to it, used to the stigma and the discrimination. So Seiya's slip didn't bother me in the slightest. But the rest of the table looked aghast—especially Usagi. "I can't believe you, Seiya!"

"I didn't mean it," Seiya tried, looking at me instead of Usagi, "I'm sorry."

I shrugged, "no problems." Everyone grew quiet, so I knew it wasn't over. "He's right; I can't dance. I don't think I would even if I could," I said with a chuckle, "I'm not big on making an ass of myself."

"You wouldn't!" Usagi yelled, gaining a lot of attention with her noise and then with her adorableness. She was so flustered; it was cute. "Dancing is fun! And no way would you make yourself look bad; you're too cool…."

When Usagi turned bright red and looked at her lap, I knew she'd said more than she meant to. It was a blessing since I was struggling to breathe. With all the eyes on Usagi and her calling me cool, I had difficulty focusing on things like inhaling and exhaling. I loved her energy, but I hated that others got to see it with me.

And to make it all worse, I wanted to dance for Usagi now.

The others at our table were glaring at me. Not Michiru; she wore a sad smile, which was worse. It bugged me; I'd rather her be angry at me than show pity. And not sympathy for my broken legs, that I was used to. No, Michiru was sad over something else, which irked me to no end without cause.

I kept my head down for the rest of the meal. And when Seiya continued to hang around as we all started to go our separate ways, I decided to ignore him. "Those look painful."

Pointing to Usagi's shoes, she looked at the high wedged shoes on her own feet as if she had forgotten. Giggles like bells came from her lips, and she looked back at me with a flush. "Yeah, they suck."

"You look beautiful," Seiya added from behind us.

I felt for the guy; I did, but not enough to give him even a moment with Usagi. "You want a ride?"

I don't know what I expected, gesturing to my 'ride', which was my wheelchair. It was a defense mechanism, and I knew it, but I'd made jokes about my current predicament for most of my life. All of it if you considered that I didn't remember my life before my wheelchair.

Usagi's face turned purple, and then she nodded. I was going to die of a heart attack when she sat in my lap. But then, she sighed and leaned into me with an arm around my neck. "Ah, thank you. That's much better."

I choked on my air and laughed, but Usagi didn't get up. If this was part of what made me cool, I'd take it and…wheel. "Which way?"

"Minako," she said plainly.

From here, the subway would be faster. But I wasn't going for speed. I had no clue when, but Seiya had left us alone at some point. Had he said goodbye? If he had, I didn't hear it; my heart was beating loudly in my ears.

Usagi wrapped her other arm around me and looked at my face. "I'm sorry about Seiya."

"I'm used to it…."

"No, I meant about…he confessed to me a while ago, and even though I told him I didn't feel the same, he asked me to try."

"So…he is your boyfriend?" I asked with my heart in my throat.

Usagi shook her head so hard she almost fell off. "No! I told him I couldn't date him. Tonight was just…."

She stopped and stared at my chest instead. "Friends?"

The loud sigh she released pushed her head up. Usagi looked at the stars above that shined through the light pollution. "Everyone acts like we're supposed to be together, but I don't see Seiya that way!"

"How do you see him?"

"As a brother or sister!"

I tried not to laugh, but a snort came out, and Usagi looked back at me. "Sister? That's mean."

"I only meant that…." Usagi was playing with the buttons of my polo, and I barely registered her talking, "that I see him as family. I have no…romantic feelings towards him at all."

"Maybe you need to change your perspective of him?" What the hell was I saying? "if you saw him as a man, then you would have romantic feelings towards him, right? He's some pop star that likes to dance, and he seems nice."

"Nice? He insulted you!"

Usagi's eyes were big and close, swallowing me and making me say stupid things. "Seiya only told the truth. I can't dance, and I never will."

"There are other ways to dance besides using your feet," Usagi whispered.

When had we gotten so close? I wasn't even paying attention to where we were going anymore. Just pushing our 'ride' along the streets of Tokyo without a care in the world. Who could care about trivial things like light poles and cracks in the pavement? I know I didn't give a shit with Usagi staring me in the eyes. I could make out the pink hue of her cheeks in my peripheral, and all other thoughts had flown off into outer space.

I knew Usagi felt the same when someone huffed angrily at us and glared as they went around. Apparently, I cared so little for our surroundings that I had stopped rolling in the middle of the sidewalk. Business people working late had to go around us, splitting like the sea. Usagi fidgeted and tried to get up. "I should walk…I'm embarrassing you."

I started rolling again so she couldn't get up, "the last thing you do is embarrass, Usagi."

We arrived all too soon at Usagi's house with a few more awkward moments and directions. I didn't stop her this time when she tried to get up, but before her feet touched the ground, she shifted back and put her arms around my neck tightly. "I will see you tomorrow?"

My earlier tardiness hadn't been forgotten or forgiven. "I'm sorry…I meant to come sooner…."

It was a good thing my explanation was cut short since I couldn't tell Usagi the real reason I didn't come today. Getting pulled into a hug was pleasant and life-saving since I couldn't tell Usagi who I was. Her lack of recognition only proved that she wouldn't believe me anyway.

"I was…worried. I was afraid I would never see you again."

Shit, I had been so thoughtless. I didn't get a damn; I wrapped my arms around Usagi and squeezed her tighter than I should. She had lost everyone for almost a year, and here I was, worried about getting discovered?! "I forgot; I'm so sorry, Usako. I forgot how long you waited for us to come back." I pulled her back and whipped tears away with my hands again. "It's not your fault, understand? We were the ones that got our hearts taken. You didn't make us lose them; we weren't strong enough to stop it."

Her head tilted in confusion, and it put me in a stupor with how cute she looked. I wanted to kiss her so badly my lips itched. However, Usagi slowly pushed me back until she stood before me. I thought she would say goodnight, that she would smile prettily and give me a sweet goodbye. My greediness had ruined the moment, and Usagi was ready to run; of course, she was.

But she didn't move, looming over me with a perplexed look n her beautiful face. "You're…Tuxedo Kamen?"