14 February 1991

It was finally a windless night in mid-winter. Dumbledore's tiny letter came across Tonks' desk halfway through the afternoon, bearing a simple message: "Tonight, 7 pm." It had taken all of Tonks' self-control not to leave her desk earlier than necessary, and at 5 o'clock exactly, she sped out of the Ministry, towards Grimmauld Place.

She Apparated to the top step, and let herself into the house quietly. She was halfway up the steps when she ran into Remus, who looked worse for wear.

"Remus."

"N-Nymphadora." His eyes were puffy and red-rimmed, flecked with gold and despondent. "I wasn't expecting you. If I'd known…I'm sorry."

Tonks almost felt sorry for him. She had crushed his heart repeatedly, with the last death knell in her letter to him just after Christmas. She felt guilty in the moment, not having realized how painful it had been to reject him one final time. "Remus, it's fine. You live here. I should've sent a message…I needed to get something."

Remus stepped aside on the step, backing against the wall. He closed his eyes, trembling, as she walked past on her way to the attic. When she was finally at the top step, she heard a hoarse sob, tugging at her heart. The pain bit at her heart, too, but it was impossible to tell, even after all these years, whether it was her own heart that hurt or the memories from Dora that hurt.

Deciding not to dwell on the pain, she approached the portrait in question.

"Belinda!" Tonks called, and the portrait was filled by Belinda and her snake-scarf.

"You're too old to be in the attic," Belinda drawled. "Much too old for children's books."

"You do realize that I haven't been up here to read in ages? I've got something to do. Now, please let me in for what will be the last time ever, I hope."

Belinda sniffed reprovingly. "There will be no Black heirs?"

"Sure, whenever I get this nonsense done with, now please move the portrait?"

Belinda huffed angrily but slid the portrait aside so Tonks could enter the secret attic she'd been laboring in for years. Hours of research, reflection, and discovery were done in this room…she would have Kreacher move the research elsewhere when she was ready.

The jewelry box that had been safely keeping Voldemort's horcruxes for fifteen years, from one generation of Dora to the next, was finally ready for destruction. Tonks quivered as she took the jewelry box from its safe hiding place, never to haunt Grimmauld Place again. The jewelry box was stuffed into her rucksack – the very one she knew Dora had once placed them inside of in the late 70s – and Tonks swept out of the secret attic library, trembling with apprehension.

She eyed the door to the basement kitchen. Dinner before Fiendfyre would be wise, Tonks decided, and she went down the steps to find Remus, once more, puffy and red-rimmed at the kitchen table.

"Merlin, Remus, I'm so sorry I keep doing this," Tonks said, flushing. "I keep fucking up with you."

Remus raised a tired hand at Tonks. "You have every right to be furious with me, and with all of us, really. I'm not making this easier by moping."

"Still, I…I'm sorry."

"'S fine," Remus mumbled. "I'll go up to my room now."

"I don't want to force you out."

"You would be well within your rights to do so. This is your house, after all."

"Remus, please don't be passive-aggressive with me." Tonks scrunched her eyes closed, and rubbed her temples with her fingers. "You live here, and I want you to live here. I'm sorry I hurt you, and I really do want to remain friendly with you."

"You're right. I'm being unreasonable." Remus sighed, ran his fingers down his face, and sat back in his seat. "Please, sit…or don't, if you're leaving."

Tonks smiled weakly at him. "I was going to eat before I left. I've got a, err, hot date ahead, I suppose." She stifled a laugh, until she saw Remus' anguished expression, realizing her poor choice of words.

"It's Valentine's Day, of course." Remus looked particularly forlorn. "I'm sorry, Nymphadora, I can't do this right now. It's – it's too much."

"No, Remus, that came out all wrong," Tonks apologized hastily. "I'm setting somethings on fire tonight. That's why I said…oh, never mind. If you consider a 'hot date' setting things on fire with Dumbledore, that's what I'm doing tonight."

Remus jolted, and looked back at Tonks curiously.

"I can't tell you what, where, or why. At least not now. It's a complicated matter, and it's with Dumbledore."

Remus exhaled, clearly relieved. "You'll be safe?"

"As safe as I can be with him, so it's all up to chance," Tonks smiled crookedly. "But I should be fine."

Little else was said as they ate sandwiches in the kitchen. Remus kept looking back at Tonks with a pained expression, the longing in his eyes tugging at her heart. It was harder than she expected to be around him, especially after the final blow to his hope.

"Well, I'm off," Tonks said. "You have a good night, Remus."

"You too," Remus replied softly. His wrung his hands at his sides as she gathered the last of her things, re-checking that the jewelry box was still safely in her rucksack. As she gave him one last glance before going back up the stairs, she could have sworn she heard him whisper "be safe, my love." She was too afraid to look back.

….

The night was cold and crisp, but windless. Lestrange Manor stood tall and proud, now covered by overgrown ivy. Tonks remembered the first time she visited the estate as a ten year old. It had frightened her so much she had promised she would blow it up one day. Arson was close enough, she thought.

She went up the steps to the manor, and let herself through the wards. The house had been relatively untouched in the last ten years. Mosby was sent annually to ensure nothing lived inside Lestrange Manor, but with the Fidelius Charm her mother had cast all those years ago, it was impossible that anyone but Andromeda and Tonks herself would know the location.

"Homenum revelio," Tonks cast, pointing her wand ahead of her. There was no indication that any humans dwelt inside, and she strode towards the nightmarish dining room.

The sight of the dining room led to multiple severe, horrifying flashbacks in Tonks' mind. The Longbottoms. Prisoners. Dora herself casting the Cruciatus Curse. Tonks pushed the memories away, practicing Occlumency. It was an imperfect solution, but it saved her from a panic attack. She needed her wits about her before she set the place on fire.

Tonks set the jewelry box containing four pieces of Voldemort's soul in the head chair, along with four perfectly preserved vials full of basilisk venom, one on each side of the jewelry box. Dora's memories had taught her that the madman sat there, while Dora often sat in a side chair. She could almost see the dinners – Voldemort, the Lestranges, and Dora – and Tonks shuddered to think of what Dora had endured.

Once the jewelry box was set on what had once been Voldemort's dining throne, alongside the vials of basilisk venom, Tonks set back out of Lestrange Manor, sealing the front door closed with an additional security charm.

A figure appeared across the drive – Dumbledore.

Tonks cast the Patronus Charm, seeing her silvery rabbit approach the figure with her instructions. Moments later, Dumbledore's phoenix Patronus confirmed his arrival, and Tonks set out through the Anti-Apparition wards and the boundaries of the Fidelius Charm to where Dumbledore stood.

"Wotcher, Professor," Tonks greeted, winking at him. "I've been waiting so long to do this."

Dumbledore raised an eyebrow at her. "You've only known of the horcruxes for two years."

"Yes, but when mum brought me here when I was 10, I was so spooked I promised myself I'd blow it up. Childhood dream come true, yeah?" Tonks was grinning, now giddy to set the manor on fire and destroy it.

"Are the horcruxes safely inside?"

"All four of them," Tonks beamed. "This is one of the best days of my life."

"You should feel proud of yourself for all your hard work." Dumbledore's blue eyes twinkled, even in the darkness of the night. "Will you tell me the location of Lestrange Manor?"

"Read this." Tonks gave Dumbledore a scrap of paper revealing the precise location of Lestrange Manor.

Moments later, he smiled. "The ivy is rather lovely. What a shame to lose it."

"We can regrow ivy. I'm not letting Voldemort regrow himself."

"Well put. Now, on my count we cast the Fiendfyre. When the structure is completely destroyed, we will simultaneously cast the countercurse until the fire is out."

Tonks beamed, shaking with gleeful anticipation. "Whenever you're ready, Professor."

"One…two…three—" Dumbledore and Tonks held their wands out, casting Fiendfyre at Lestrange Manor. As the cursed fire took shape – a basilisk and a chimaera – Tonks felt a sharp pain in her chest. She clutched her chest with her free hand, eyes watering from the effort of controlling the Fiendfyre and the excruciating pain blinding her senses.

Tonks was sobbing as the fire burned, every ounce of effort going into keeping the fire controlled. She screamed as the pain seared her chest, her free hand massaging her sternum to no avail.

"COUNTERCURSE, NOW!" Dumbledore bellowed. Tonks screamed, now on hands and knees, clutching the wand in her hand as she cried in agony.

The countercurse barely left her lips, and the pain continued burning her chest. The pain was nothing like she had ever felt before. It radiated from her chest, burning, cruel, agonizing pain.

The night air was colder now, but the burning in her chest kept her hot, flushed, and panting. Her wand now lay at her side, Dumbledore's long beard looking over her and casting charms on her writhing body. She was certain she was screaming, as her throat felt as if it were on fire.

Whether it was minutes or hours later, Tonks awoke on the cold, frosty ground. She was on her back and was finally feeling cold. The pain in her chest had dulled to a steady throb.

"Tonks, can you hear me?"

Tonks nodded feebly. "Water." Her voice was hoarse and her throat itched.

Dumbledore conjured a glass of water, and Tonks drank greedily from it several times before she felt able to speak.

"Did we do it?" she rasped.

"I want you to check," Dumbledore murmured. "If any remain, they will be more dangerous for me than for you. But first, take these."

Dumbledore handed vial after vial to Tonks, each filled with a different potion. She didn't question anything, and drank them one by one until there was nothing left.

Her head stopped spinning, and her chest stopped throbbing. She was tired and weak, but could stand shakily.

"Can you walk?" Dumbledore asked, keeping Tonks standing by gripping her forearm.

"Yeah, just give me a minute." Tonks closed her eyes and tucked a lock of mousy brown hair behind her ear. The effort had taken the morphing out of her, apparently. A few deep breaths later, and Tonks felt well enough to walk slowly back to where the manor had once stood, searching out the place where the dining room had been.

Charred remains of the horcruxes lay in a pile of ash and rubble. A silvery bit of diadem shone through the ashes, and Tonks gingerly bent down to touch it. Only cool metal remained; no evidence of Dark magic coursed through the metal. Tonks cast diagnostic charms and curse-detection charms, to find nothing but soot under her feet.

Tonks looked up to the night sky, letting the now-gentle breeze wash over her face. She had never had such a terrible reaction to casting Fiendfyre, but she had also never tried destroying bits of someone's soul with it. Was it murder, she wondered?

"I took the liberty of scanning the area for curses or Dark magic," Dumbledore said, standing a few yards from where Tonks stood. "It would appear we succeeded, Tonks." Dumbledore was beaming, a full, toothy grin that she'd only seen once before. She still felt unsteady on her feet, and it was only a moment later when she felt herself fall against the ash, overwhelmed with success and exhaustion.

….

"I'd prefer if you didn't tell anyone about this, Remus." Tonks heard Dumbledore's soothing voice, her ear pressed against a soft surface. "Tonks helped me with a tremendously important task. I cannot tell you what it is just yet, but I would like for you to keep an eye on her. I've let Alastor know to have her take the day off tomorrow."

"She mentioned something about fire before she left," Remus said, his voice full of emotion. "She looks like she's been through hell."

"It wasn't a pleasant or easy task. I apologize I cannot tell you more, Remus. Please take care of her for me. I'd have asked Sirius, but he's too close to Andromeda and Ted. I trust no one else with her life."

"Not even Mad-Eye?"

"I don't need him implicated in this," Dumbledore said firmly. "I understand you've had a recent dispute, but I know you wouldn't hurt her."

"Never again, Albus." Remus' voice was heavy with emotion as he made his vow.

"You'll care for her?"

"Of course I will," Remus said vehemently. "I love her. She may not love me…" Remus' voice broke, a dry sob emerging from the back of his throat. "She may not love me, but I love her. I always will."

"Thank you, Remus. Please give her my best. I'll send a message tomorrow to ask after her."

There was a shuffling sound near the door, a creak, and a deep sigh. Tonks pretended to be asleep, unwilling to engage in conversation with Remus. She had just destroyed four pieces of Voldemort's soul…she didn't need any more pain at the moment.

Tonks heard soft steps approach the bed, and a small dip at her side indicated Remus had sat down close to her torso. Quiet, restrained breathing interrupted the silence. She willed herself to stay calm and mirror Remus' even breathing.

She almost flinched when Remus' hand rested on her hair. He began stroking it, which felt surprisingly good, even from his rough, scarred hand.

"My love," he murmured. "I'm glad you're sleeping. I wouldn't be able to tell you how I feel otherwise. You've been so dreadfully angry at me, and Merlin knows I deserve it. We all do, but me especially. I am sorry, my Nymphadora. So very sorry."

Tonks struggled to stay still and breathe steadily. Half of her yearned to keep hearing what Remus had to say; the other half wanted to slap him and tell him to leave her alone. She was knackered – emotionally and physically drained – and decided against stopping him. She doubted she'd remember much of his pathetic attempts at an apology in the morning, she thought.

"This must be what you look like without all the morphing," Remus continued, still stroking her mousy brown hair. Tonks relaxed into the touch. It was soothing, after all. "I saw this once, I think. When Dora first told me you were Metamorphmagi. She never let her guard down with me, and that's understandable now. You were right. That relationship was unsustainable."

"When you were a little girl, I thought you were so annoying," Remus chuckled softly. "But you were accepting, kind, and loving. You were everything Dora had been before, without the burdens of the world. Your mother said you were trying to compete with her, afraid you'd let us all down by not being good enough."

"I don't want to call your fears ridiculous, but you are the best version of Nymphadora Tonks I've ever known," Remus continued. "I will never stop thanking Dora for allowing you to be who she wanted to be. She never wanted you – herself, really – to be the bitter, broken person she was by the end of it all. She wanted you to be you, to be this terribly brave, clever, kind, and funny witch. I thank Dora for that, and I loved what I knew of her, but as time passed and you grew, I came to love you more."

"I came to love you more not because you were sort of-once Dora, but because of who you came to be. Merlin, no matter how many times you broke my heart – intentionally or not – I loved you. I couldn't ever stop loving you. I knew I was in trouble when you were about 18. When you were a bit younger and wrote to me about your boyfriends, I felt so protective of you. No one could be good enough for Nymphadora, I thought."

"You amused and impressed me as you finished your studies. Your tenacity was to be admired. You didn't have Dora's years of study, and yet you beat her record. Look at you now, ahead in the Auror trainee program," Remus said, sighing contentedly as he stroked her hair. Every so often, his thumb would brush against Tonks' temple, sending a shiver down her spine, and a fluttering in her abdomen, at his touch.

"Last summer is when I realized how much I loved you, and had loved you for years," Remus said, his voice cracking. "I finally knew how Dora felt, waiting for years until I grew up. It was much harder with you, my love. An older wizard and a younger witch? Your father there always? I can't tell you how many times I thought of running away. But, the love I had for you until then was a deep affection. I scarcely allowed myself to look at you for more than a few seconds until last summer. Nymphadora, I know you've said you don't like the way you look without your morphing, but you're gorgeous just like this. There you were, a beautiful young witch I'd known for years and only finally saw as a woman."

"Do you know why I stayed, after all that time? I once made a promise to Dora to wait for her. I didn't keep that promise, and it broke both our hearts irreparably. I'll spare you the details – it's not like you can hear me, anyway. I vowed never to hurt you again, and I began to hope you might come to love me someday. Not because of your childhood crush, or because I had loved Dora, but because even as a child, you were so steadfast in your affection for me, and I foolishly thought I could win you over, now that you were grown up."

"Merlin, what a fool's errand," Remus said. He coughed lightly, likely from another dry sob. "If only I'd known you hated me for years for lying to you. If only I'd known you thought I was a creepy, older bloke waiting for you to become of age. If only I'd known how much you…despised me." Remus sniffled, his hand now gone from Tonks' hair. She found herself missing the contact, and the butterflies that had gathered in her abdomen as a result.

"Our relationship could only be complicated, because of Dora, but my Nymphadora…Good Godric, you'd hex me into next week if you knew that's how I thought of you…my Nymphadora, all the same, you're so different. You're two different Metamorphmagi to me. I think Dora felt this way sometimes. She knew me at this age, in my thirties, and she saw me as a petty, jealous teenager. Not the best start, but she loved me all the same. I think she saw us as two different Remuses sometimes, but I'll never know."

"Anyway, I'm rambling." Remus exhaled forcefully and returned his hand to Tonks' hair. She resisted the urge to sigh happily at his soothing touch. "You should rest now. I'll be back to check on you. I just…needed to get that off my chest. I needed to tell you how much I loved you, and why. I know you'd never want to hear it otherwise, but maybe now I can let you go. You can be with someone whole and healthy, as you always deserved."

A low whimper escaped from his lips, and he retracted his hand from Tonks' hair. He moved a little closer and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "Goodnight, my love."

He stood and walked across the room back to the door, shutting it carefully behind him.

Tonks lay in place, still feeling the warmth from Remus' lips on her forehead. Of all the surprises she'd had that night, Remus' heartfelt confession of love was the biggest one. For the first time in years, she'd been glad to hear him speak, and a little part of her wished to hear him speak once more, but it would have to wait. Her eyelids grew heavier, and she fell into a deep slumber.

….

23 February 1991

"How have you been, Tonks?" Dumbledore asked gently. "You look better."

"Much better. I was at Grimmauld Place for a few days. Remus was a better healer than I expected, though I doubt that should surprise me at this point." Tonks bit her lip, feeling guilty for having mistreated Remus so often in the last few years. He had shown her nothing but loving, careful attention as she recovered from the night of casting Fiendfyre. His confession of love had led her to rethink what she'd thought for years, but she hadn't found the right time to say anything more than polite, if distant, remarks to Remus the entire weekend she'd spent at Grimmauld Place.

"Tonks?" She looked up to see Dumbledore's eyes twinkling back at her, an unusual sadness behind them.

"I'm sorry, lost in my thoughts. I'm fine." Tonks bit the inside of her cheek now, running her tongue around the inside of her mouth. "Is this about the horcruxes? We didn't miss one, did we? You're looking…not happy?"

"I've a lot on my mind today, beginning with you," Dumbledore said heavily. "I was wondering what happened to you the night we destroyed the horcruxes. I didn't ask about it then, as you were clearly in pain. Can you tell me what you felt?"

"My chest was on fire," Tonks answered. "It started off dull but as the fire burned it was excruciating. White-hot searing pain…I have vague memories of Dora being under the Cruciatus Curse and it felt something like that. You didn't feel it?"

"I did not." Dumbledore removed his half-moon spectacles and rubbed his eyes. He had never looked so old and weary to her. "I have a theory as to why you felt the pain…as did Harry."

"Harry was in pain?" Tonks sat at the edge of her seat, suddenly concerned. "Why? Where is he? What happened?"

"Your mother wrote to me that he had nightmares and his scar hurt. Nightmares were not unusual for either of you growing up, at least not until 1981. He was well recovered by the next morning, thankfully, and it appears no harm was done."

"Unlike me." Tonks remembered waking up the next morning covered in soot and ash, and various welts from burn marks on her arms from flames and sparks that had melted their way through her robes.

"Unlike you, yes." Dumbledore tapped his fingers against the desk, and sighed heavily. "There is no easy way to say this, but I have a theory as to why you and Harry suffered that night…as well as the reason your scars are cursed in a specific manner."

"I'm not going to like this, am I?" Tonks slumped back in her seat. If only one part of her life could be less complicated, she thought miserably.

"No, and it pains me a great deal to share my theory with you, but I can't withhold it from you. I do request we keep it from Harry and your parents for now, until the time is right," Dumbledore said. His eyes weren't twinkling or gleaming; instead, they were filled with melancholy.

"Well, I suppose I'm not getting any younger," Tonks said glumly. "What's another complication?"

Dumbledore grimaced. "This is more than a complication, if my theory is correct. I shan't keep you waiting. Do you remember the night that Dora died?"

"Vividly, unfortunately. It's not easy to forget someone dying like that."

"Do you remember what happened after Dora died?"

"A flash of green light, and a scream," Tonks said promptly. "I passed out after that, and woke up almost a week later."

"Yes. After Voldemort attempted to kill you, he was weakened. James Potter arrived just in time to shield Harry, but Voldemort killed James. He then attempted to kill Harry, and that is when the Killing Curse backfired a second time." Dumbledore put his half-moon spectacles back on, staring at Tonks over them. "Do you know why the Killing Curse backfired for you?"

"Love? Because Dora loved us?" Tonks said, scratching her head. "Something about protection?"

"Yes. Dora had sacrificed herself willingly, protecting you both. She had also created a Blood Binding Potion to ensure that if something happened to James and Lily, Harry would still have abundant blood protection against Voldemort. However, she did a different blood binding ritual on you."

"I do remember that. She cut our palms and put them together. It made me dizzy and confused." Tonks stared into the distance, at Dumbledore's Pensieve. She had long since reviewed her memories of that night, always searching for clues as to how and why Dora's memories had been transferred to her.

"She did some highly experimental magic on you that night. I'm not sure how she managed it, truthfully," Dumbledore said calmly. "But, as far as I'm aware, I believe I know how it worked."

"One of the things Dora learned in her time as an Unspeakable was the role of love in magic, and what love could do for another. She discovered that love was self-giving; giving of one's time, self, and life to another in friendship or family. Of course, that's often metaphorical or analogical. What Dora did to you was literal. She gave you some of her own life."

Tonks' jaw dropped in horror. "What? Like giving me her soul, like a horcrux? Was she out of her mind?"

"I don't know that calling it a horcrux would describe what she did, as horcruxes are inherently evil and split one's soul apart. The soul is not meant to be ripped apart," Dumbledore said pensively. "What Dora did was share her life and love with you, as it was unlikely she could have shared her soul with you, considering you likely had the same souls to begin with. This made the experiment all that more dangerous."

"I don't understand," Tonks said, absentmindedly scratching her chest. "I have two lives? But they're the same?"

"I'll get to that, but first, Dora. She didn't split her soul. Nothing was ripped apart. She shared herself with you.. It weakened her greatly, but it gave you strength, as well as some of her abilities. The ability to become an Animagus comes to mind. Whether that was intentional, I cannot know," Dumbledore explained gently. "I believe that in weakening herself, Dora gave you life itself – her own life, I might add, strengthened your own enough that when Voldemort attempted to kill you, it was only partially successful."

"I believe that when Voldemort cast the Killing Curse on you, the strength of life and magic flowing in your veins was more than he bargained for," Dumbledore continued. "You were certainly hurt when he tried killing you, but Dora's magic kept you miraculously alive. Your Healer at St. Mungo's had no certainty that you would survive, and yet you did."

"So it was as if I had more than one life at the time?" Tonks asked. "How is that different than a horcrux?"

"Because souls are meant to stay intact, Tonks, while life can be given for others, shared with others, or sacrificed for others. She gave you more life, strengthening your ties to this world, while simultaneously weakening her own ties. It must have been tremendously easy for Voldemort to kill her, but killing you was almost impossible, given what Dora had done for you."

Dumbledore clasped his hands together on the desk, looking back towards the Pensieve. "Whatever life you did lose that night, it was enough that it didn't kill you, but it didn't fully backfire on Voldemort, either."

"If Dora gave me super-life or whatever we're calling it," Tonks said slowly, still struggling to learn the strange, experimental magic of life and love, "then why did Harry live?"

"Ah, yes, Harry. When Dora cast her body in front of yours and Harry's, there was a chance that the blood protection would only extend to one of you, rather than both of you. I believe this is why she gave you some of her life, to attempt to ensure you would live. If I'm not mistaken, she asked you to remember to love Harry and your loved ones?"

"She did. Dora said that if I loved everyone enough I could save them."

"Dora's preparation was remarkable," Dumbledore said softly. "Truly extraordinary. If her own gamble failed to protect Harry, but protected only you instead, she trusted that you would cast yourself in front of Harry, thus providing the blood protection needed for the curse to backfire. What she did not expect was James' death, which only added to the strength of Harry's protection. However, what none of us expected - what I have been dreading, truly, is what I've been suspecting of you and Harry for quite some time."

"I believe that when Voldemort attempted to kill you and partially failed, it backfired enough that he split his soul instantly, but unintentionally. I believe that piece of his soul went to the next available being…you."

Tonks felt her jaw drop and her body grow cold. "What the actual fuck. Are you telling me that I have Voldemort inside of me? How am I supposed to kill my own horcrux?"

"Yes, although there is more to tell you, unfortunately," Dumbledore said, as a tear fell down his cheek. "The curse completely backfired with Harry, and that created another horcrux. The absolute evil of attempting to kill one child, followed by another, completely undid him. There was only one other being that could receive the horcrux, and it was Harry."

"Wait. Harry and I both have pieces of Voldemort stuck to our souls?"

"Yes." There was near silence as Tonks sat, slack jawed and terrified, in front of the Headmaster. She was one of Voldemort's horcruxes. Harry, her brother, was one of his horcruxes. The two of them were united in blood and soul, and there was nothing she could do…was there?

Tonks closed her eyes and breathed deeply. "Okay. I am a horcrux. Harry is a horcrux. What do we do now?"

"There is a prophecy that tells us of Harry and Voldemort, which is where we begin," Dumbledore said quietly. "Allow me to repeat it to you."

"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches... born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies... and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not... and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives... the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies..."

"Either die live at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives…does that mean Harry has to kill Voldemort? My baby brother, Harry? The little boy who plays pranks on his uncles and flies with me?" Tonks' chin quivered, thinking of her messy-haired little brother, happy, carefree, and loved. He would have to become a killer one day, she concluded, the thought breaking her heart.

"Yes. But Harry killing Voldemort himself will not rid ourselves of all his horcruxes."

Tonks' heart thumped loudly as she considered Dumbledore's words. They had destroyed four horcruxes. She and Harry were horcruxes. "What will…" she squeaked, as she mulled over the answer.

"My dear, I'm afraid you know the answer," Dumbledore said, another tear falling on his cheek.

"I have to die," she whispered. "So does Harry. We both have to die."

Another tense silence fell over the office. She would have to die. Harry would have to die. The horcruxes had to be destroyed or Voldemort could return.

"Okay," she squeaked. Her body was too hot, and her mind was filled with static. She would have to die. Dumbledore said nothing as a few more tears fell down into his beard. Tonks couldn't find it in herself to cry, not yet.

"When will you kill me?" Tonks said, finally feeling a tear fall down her cheek. "Please allow me to say goodbye to my family and friends first, but you can Avada Kedavra me so it's less painful…or if you need to set me on Fiendfyre if I'm a horcrux. Just do it quickly…" A sob was caught at the back of her throat. She had sometimes contemplated death, but she had never thought of it so soon, or so violently.

"Tonks," Dumbledore said gently. "I will not kill you, and I cannot be the one to do it. Although the prophecy does not refer to you, I believe only Voldemort himself can kill you and destroy his horcrux simultaneously. He will still remain, as will Harry. They will have to kill one another for every horcrux to be destroyed."

"All three of us have to die," Tonks repeated softly. "I have to sacrifice myself. Harry has to sacrifice himself."

"Yes, and you must do so willingly. It appears you are already willing. You are more courageous and tenacious than I could have ever imagined."

"I haven't died yet. At least not in this timeline," Tonks laughed darkly, feeling the hollowness in her chest. "There's no coming back from this one, is there?"

More tears fell down Dumbledore's cheeks and onto his long, white beard. "No. I am truly sorry."

"Did Dora know this would happen? Did she do this to me?"

"Dora knew that Harry had been a horcrux and had been attempting to avoid it, until Peter Pettigrew betrayed them. I believe she hoped to avoid the inevitability, or postpone it. I doubt that even in her wildest dreams or plans, she expected both of you to become horcruxes. This is outside the prophecy."

"When do I tell them? My parents? Harry?"

"Not until we are certain that it is happening," Dumbledore said. "I wanted to explain to you why you were in such pain the night we destroyed the horcruxes. It was as if you were being killed too that night, and you could feel the pain from them. This is why Harry felt ill. This is why you both can speak to snakes."

"We cannot predict the future, although I am certain that once Harry begins at Hogwarts, Voldemort will try to get his hands on him. Harry is too well protected with your family for Voldemort to go anywhere near him. Dora shared with me all of Voldemort's attempts to get to harry. If history repeats itself, I will be prepared. I would like to postpone your deaths as long as I'm able. If it is possible for us to wait until you are both of old age…I will attempt to protect you both as long as I'm living."

"What if it isn't?" Tonks said, in just barely a whisper. "What if he comes back?"

Dumbledore unclasped his hands and brought one of his plum robe sleeves up to his eyes, wiping away the tears that had accumulated on his cheeks. "He will have to come back with a body to cast the Killing Curse, and I've seen to it that his avenues for doing so are limited. If and when he has a body, I hope it takes long enough that you and Harry can live long, fulfilling lives."

Tonks sniffled and wiped away the moisture that had gathered at the corners of her eyes. "Somehow I doubt that's going to happen."

"We can try. I can try to give you a long life. This is my promise to you, Tonks, and to Harry."

"Please don't make a promise you can't keep." Tonks' chin quivered again, feeling the weight of the world on her shoulders. Sooner or later, she would meet her end from the Killing Curse, and there was little she could do to stop it.

"I will do my utmost not to fail you. I live with my fair share of regrets and disappointments, and I do not want you and Harry to be among them."

Tonks nodded weakly. "What do with my life now? It all seems so…meaningless."

"Life is not meaningless, even if you find your expiration date is sooner rather than later. Live your life and enjoy it. Love your family and friends and make the most of what you have, as if you were dying tomorrow or in one hundred years."

"I'm not even twenty," Tonks murmured. "I…I'm not sure what I'll do."

"Will you continue as an Auror?"

Tonks bit the inside of her cheek, considering her options. She was already outrageously wealthy with no need to work. She could spend her life doing nothing else...but that would require telling her family and friends of her planned death. No, it's best to continue as if nothing had changed, Tonks decided.

"I think I will," Tonks finally said. "I'm going to keep living as if nothing happened. It'll be easier, I hope."

"I should add that you will have to die first," Dumbledore said gravely. "The prophecy refers to Harry and Voldemort. If someone kills Voldemort…it will have to be Harry."

Tonks clutched her chest, thinking of her beloved brother having to kill Voldemort while she lay dead somewhere nearby. The thought hurt her, but she nodded in understanding.

"Okay. I'll…I'll protect him until then," Tonks managed to say, choking on her words. "I'm going to need to do some thinking."

"Take all the time you need, Tonks. I will do my best to ensure you both live as long as you can." Dumbledore conjured tissues and gave them to her. Despite his reassurance, Tonks had a sinking feeling that her life would be cut short, ending in just a matter of years.

….

3 March 1991

It had been years since Tonks visited Blackpool. She recalled early childhood memories of her parents and grandparents on the beach, surrounded by Muggles on towels, happily sunbathing under the summer sky.

At nineteen years old, she was sitting alone on the cold beach, watching the water ebb and flow as she contemplated her life.

She'd thought about death before. The first time she contemplated death, it was when her Grandpa Tonks died. She was barely six years old and hardly had any memories of the man. He was always kind and patient with her, and he had met Dora. She wondered now if Grandpa Tonks had ever known the true nature of Dora…probably not.

The next time she'd contemplated death, she was a little older. Remus' mother and father, Hope and Lyall, had died within a year or so of each other. Hope died first, and Tonks remembered drawing pictures of her with Grandpa Tonks to give to Remus. Hope was a caring woman; Tonks recalled a day in which she talked Hope's ear off about magical creatures. She couldn't have been more than five or six years old at the time, and Hope Lupin had been nothing but gracious to her.

Her final contemplation of death, as a child, had been when Dora and the Potters died. The Potters' deaths were sad, but Dora's death had crushed her at the time. The finality of death struck her as cruel and unfair. The reality of never seeing Dora again, hearing her voice, or morphing with her had taken months to sink in.

Now, she contemplated death as an adult – barely an adult, at nineteen – and it was her own death she would be looking towards. This would be a final death. There was no time traveler that she was aware of that would allow a version of Nymphadora Tonks to exist in the world. She was the only one left, and she would be dying sooner rather than later. Despite Dumbledore's assurances that he would try to protect their lives, Tonks felt that her days – and Harry's days – were numbered.

The cold, salty wind from the ocean bit at her face. A ray of sunshine fell over her eyes, warming her slightly. Every little sensation she felt, she tried to memorize and appreciate.

Death was a funny thing, she thought. It had always loomed ahead of her in the distance, but now that it was coming for her in the near future, life felt almost pointless. The sensations she felt on the beach were fleeting. How many more times would she feel the cold breeze against her face? How many more times would she breathe in salty ocean air? How many more times would she enjoy a ray of sunshine on her cheeks?

In the nineteen years she'd lived, Tonks had accomplished quite a bit. She had finished her education, begun training as an Auror, established a fund to help werewolves with their monthly transformations…and had destroyed a relationship with one werewolf in particular. Concluding that life was too short, and her time on earth was limited, she stood and left the beach. She made one more decision as to how she'd spend the rest of her remaining years.

….

4 March 1991

Dear Remus,

If you're willing, I'd like to have dinner with you sometime. I think I'm ready to try being friends again, if you'll still have me.

Yours,

Nymphadora Tonks