When I got to the tower I saw Hinata, Kiba, and Shino. Akamaru was still shaking in Kiba's hoody from what Gaara had shown them. I'm pretty sure the guy was just screwing with them for the hell of it by this point since they weren't actually of any threat to him and he could easily crush them if he wanted. Then again he was a total crazed psycho at this time.

I talked with them a bit and had the twins go get Kabuto and the other guy. Honestly I didn't actually bother to remember his name because of how little he was actually worth in the grand scheme of things, or even the little scheme. In any case he isn't important in any shape or form beyond just being Orochimaru's cannon fodder henchman. Though I might just change that after this, or not, after all he is still a henchman.

I had already beaten the illusion guys and had Dere drop off the scrolls they had to Sauske and them.

Kabuto and the other guy showed up after two hours and were surprised to see me fine. Kabuto asked about what I had said before leaving and was surprised that I had gone and killed the two ninja with Orochimaru. I of course also made sure to refer to Orochimaru as a creepy snake pedophile who could only use his tongue to make idle threats and maybe help polish some guys penis like a common street hooker while the people who worked with him were obviously useless weaklings who had obviously been bought over by the snake pedo's tongue usage.

I swear that I have never seen the two look so angry and uncomfortable as when I had insulted both Orochimaru and them all without letting them know that I knew they were his henchmen as well. If they didn't have to keep hiding the fact that they were moles I am sure they would have tried to kill me then and there. So I did the only thing a guy like me would do in a situation where two guys couldn't break character and had to pretend to be friendly by agreeing with the things I said.

I insulted the absolute shit out of them with a huge grin. I think the guy with Kabuto had spit up blood at some point from how bad I was bashing them while Kabuto just kept on smiling and agreeing with me while having a dead look in his eyes.

I heard Kiba telling the others how those guys with the snake pedo must have really made me mad to have me say all that about them. Oh, if only he knew how much fun it was to watch these two suffer from my insults. Dirty bastards want to destroy the nice peaceful village for some guy who doesn't actually give a crap about it beyond just wanting to kill his teacher for chasing him away. Just keep sitting their and taking it.

I had to stop when Gaara walked by and Kabuto took the chance to open the scrolls I had handed to him earlier and caused Tsunade show up. I swear I have never seen a person in any of my lives look at anyone in such a way as Kabuto looked at her. He was looking at her like she was a goddess sent down from the heavens to save him from the pits of hell.

Tsunade gave him a look before looking at the extra, I found out his name was Yoroi again, and me, before congratulating us and sending us to our rooms while explaining the next part of the exams. Both Kabuto and the extra ran to their rooms as fast as possible to get away from me the second we reached the hallway.

When I got in my room Tsunade followed me in and closed the door. I sat on my bed and she sat on a chair.

"So care to explain how it is that you knew Orochimaru was at the exams?" Tsunade said with a serious look.

I just let out a sigh before also becoming serious. "Tsun told me that she smelt the old lady from one of our previous missions. That mission in particular was a trap set by Orochimaru to catch weaker ninja. The reason why I know it was him is because when the ANBU were investigating the farmhouse we found a large amount of snake tracks all over the land."

"After everything was found it was easy to draw a conclusion that the old lady was Orochimaru and that if the old ladies scent was here it meant that he was here."

I then went on to give a full account of meeting with Orochimaru and his henchmen with Tsun and Dere adding in here and there. I handed her the scrolls with their bodies and asked her to get their bounties for me. Tsunade was even more surprised when I got to my teammates.

"They smell strongly of Orochimaru's scent and I believe that they are in fact moles placed here by him to monitor Sauske and anyone else that catches his eye."

"Do you have any other proof then a scent, something I can act on?" Tsunade asked with a glare at the thought of putting me with two moles for teammates.

"I don't have any solid proof, however if Kabuto drops out at the start of the next part of the exam, then that will be proof enough."

"What do you mean?" Tsunade asked. "That doesn't prove anything from what I can tell."

"Kabuto and Yoroi both didn't do any fighting and mostly just hid. They should be perfectly ready to fight, and even more so since the other teams will be a lot more tired and worn out. If he is willing to let an easy win like this go to waste for no apparent reason then it would mean that he had another reason for being here and the only thing that happened of note was the attack on Sauske by Orochimaru."

"That is definitely a good enough reason to take him and Yoroi into custody, however that is only if he actually does decide to drop out."

"I believe it will happen."

"Fine, I need to go report to the hokage about this. You should get some rest while you can." Tsunade then stepped forward and gave me a kiss before getting startled when I put my arms around her and grabbed her butt.

"I think the hokage will understand if you are a little late, after all you were just getting the finer details." I told Tsunade with a smirk while she moaned a little.

After an hour Tsunade left with a bit more joy in her step as she went to meet the hokage.

Wait a second. Didn't the series have Kabuto show up to stop Naruto and Sakura from opening the scroll and becoming disqualified. Shit, sorry guys, it looks like I might have screwed with the timeline a bit much and caused you guys to have to be genin for another year. This will cause a lot of problems though if that is the case. Naruto won't beat Neji and won't be there to stop Gaara from going crazy. Sauske won't have a reason to learn Kakashi's chidori. Sakura will just be Sakura, though maybe with a little less training, but it isn't like her training really made a difference until Tsunade got ahold of her. Then Sakura at least became somewhat passable as a stand in for Tsunade in the war. Not really useful anywhere else though.

I also should maybe cut down on all the sex. I kind of quit caring when it came to sex in my past life and ended up just having sex whenever I wanted since I had a harem full of women and like a hundred kids already. So it really didn't matter back then, plus having to go through puberty and actually feeling like having sex after being an old man has only made it worse. Being an old man makes you no longer have as much of a sex drive and once you get too old it basically kills your ability to have any sex at all. It sucks since you know in your head how good looking a woman is, but you also know you won't do anything with her anyways.

I guess I'll cut back on the sex for a bit and just try to work on my relationships, also if anyone that I'm sleeping with gets pregnant I'm going to go well and beyond screwing up the series. Well everyone except Shizune, Tsunade can live without Shizune for a week. Also Tsunade could technically be pregnant and still do her job as hokage. Hmm, maybe I won't hold off on the sex, at least with those two. Well whatever, I'll make it up as I go. I'll just need to be more selective about who I sleep with, also I can't just ignore those I'm already with. I'm not that kind of man to just sleep with someone and then throw them away, those types of guys deserve the worst kinds of suffering.

Three days later it was time to meet the hokage and everyone else. Turns out that everyone from the series was there. When I asked how Naruto and them had gotten here I was told that they ended up traveling with Neji, Tenten and Lee after getting the scrolls from me.

Apparently Neji felt it was necessary to question Sauske on every aspect of me he could find out, much to Sauske's extreme displeasure. Tenten asked about me in the aspect of a possible dating choice, she was a bit put off to find out that I was openly dating Ino and was also sleeping with an unknown amount of women. Sakura and her had reached the point that I was a sex monster and was sleeping with every women in the village and half of the men as well. Naruto and Lee were hitting it off pretty well and were a bit sad about the fact that I was sleeping with Sakura, however they had come to an agreement to train to become stronger than me so that they could defeat me and free her from my evil womanizing clutches.

At this point it was rather open knowledge that I was sleeping with a number of people, even though nobody was sure who I was sleeping with. Can't wait for the complaints to role in from all the farmers whose wives I screwed to come up when their kids looked like me. That was going to be super awkward, also the daughters having my kids too is just going to be hilarious. I think I'm going to die early this time once Ino finds out though, she's definitely going to beat me to death.

After the hokage finished his speech it was finally time to start speaking on whether or not you were going to withdraw.

Kabuto withdrew quickly enough and I saw Tsunade nod to me when I made eye contact with her. I know he wasn't actually going to get caught since he was already a member of ANBU since long ago and was considered one of their best back then, much less how powerful he is now. It is what it is though, also doesn't help that even if he did get caught it wouldn't matter since Orochimaru is literally standing there next to the supposedly high rank shinobi and not a single person including the hokage is saying or doing shit. I give up, if you can't even tell that the super pale guy with literal snake eyes isn't The snake sanin then obviously you guys deserve to be abused a bit.

Sorry gramps, but don't blame me when you die for not saving you. You are just way to soft hearted to be a proper hokage.

Honestly if he did what he was supposed to do he would have killed a number of problem people. At the top of the list would be Orochimaru and Danzo, not to mention all the old fuckers on the council who are all secretly supporting Danzo. I mean seriously man, Danzo has an actual arm full of Uchia eyes that he got by somehow getting the Uchia clan pissed enough to consider a revolt and then having Itachi slaughter them all. He then tried to kill Itachi right after. This guy is obviously a bad guy and instead of killing him after everything he has done you just leave him to do what he wants.

Yeah so after a lot of thinking I've decided that maybe it's best if you pass on before you cause anymore problems with your whole not killing bad people ideas. Not to mention if you just stepped down and let Tsunade take over you would still have an influence on her that would honestly cause her to also fall into the letting bad people live mindset. Sorry gramps, but you got to go, but at least you'll do a solid for the world by messing up Orochimaru's hands by exploding yourself. So you'll at least do something right when literally faced with death.

Oh well, back to the preliminaries.

First up was Sauske and Yoroi. It went fine with Sauske beating him pretty fast. Yoroi literally got the crap knocked out of him by getting kicked like twice and hitting the ground, so it really wasn't much. Though the whole chakra drain thing he could do was kind of interesting. I figured if he didn't die, or even if he did, I could check out how he did that. It would be interesting if during the fourth shinobi war I went and set up a formation to drain everyone of chakra to the point of near death. Obito would probably be the only person who could avoid it since he can travel through dimensions. Plus I would need to figure out somewhere to store the crap.

In any case I think I'll just study him a bit since this is a very interesting ability and has a lot of applications.

The second round was Shino and the sound ninja with the broken arms. I know Shino is a nice guy, but he is honestly one creepy mofo. Plus having to fight a swarm of his bugs would be a nightmare. Even I wouldn't have it easy in a fight with him unless I was on my A game. The sound shinobi never had a chance and everyone was freaked out by Shino's bugs by the end of the match.

The third match was the one everyone was waiting for. It was me versus Ino. Which in hindsight was beyond terrifying as it could very well end in a terrible way. I mean I could hit her, but then I would feel bad and be labeled as a woman beater, I also couldn't let her hit me since it would also feel bad and would be seen as me refusing to hit women and could even cause Ino to feel insulted by not properly fighting her. I didn't have a proper way to fight against her. Which was probably the very reason why I had been told to fight her.

What about Kankuro? Some of you might be asking this question, since he was originally supposed to fight against the third one of Kabuto's teammates. The very teammate whose spot I took. Well he ended up fighting against Sakura, who because of all our training together after she finally stopped watching from a distance and joined in, was actually a good bit stronger. Sakura was starting to get some pointers from Tsunade, but it hadn't reached the point she would later on in the series.

Sakura almost won against Kankuro which didn't make all that much difference in the grand scheme of things since they would help attack the village later. Kankuro was confused about what happened to make him almost lose, as was most everyone else who saw the massive fluke that happened. It made him feel pretty stupid after he won too since Sakura is considered one of the weakest shinobi there.

Sakura had run headlong into him on accident because she tripped when I cheered for her by calling her honey. She literally headbutted him so hard that it broke his puppet and caused him to be headbutted into the floor while wrapped up in his cloth. He was dazed when Sakura basically went to town by curb stomping him and punching him all over in ways that were more meant to let off her anger at me making her look stupid then it was to defeat him once she noticed he was in the wrap. Though when she picked him up and did a piledriver into the concrete I think he had finally had enough. He was tied up and beat up and he didn't have any time to get untied before Sakura went crazy on him. Poor guy was knocked around without being able to do anything.

Kankuro finally snapped and used his chakra strings on the cloth around him to use it to tie up Sakura's hands to her feet and then Sparta kicked her in the face. I saw blood fly and knew she had broken her nose and probably her lip. She was out cold in an instant, leaving an absolutely furious Kankuro who had to be stopped by force since he wanted to kill her. I thought only Gaara was a psycho, but maybe it's a sand thing. Then again he did just have the ever-loving crap kicked out of him.

In any case, after their match I was sent up to face Ino, who was already acting flustered since I was her opponent. I of course tried to keep my cool and be as awesome as I could by acting all domineering and standing in a way as to appear mysterious. Standing there while wearing a trench coat and letting some chakra leave through my back to make the trench coat flutter and make some mist appear around me to look cool was a bit difficult. I think it worked, but from the looks the hokage and the other adults gave me, it was obviously not working for them. Though it did work pretty well on the teenage ninjas since they were all starry eyed about it. Thank goodness for teenage drama.

So Ino, it looks like you will need to defeat me to pass the exams. I would wish you luck, but I think we both know that I'll be winning." I said while dragging my hand through my hair. I heard some sighs and shrieks from the girls, Tsunade and the other women just let out snorts and tried not to laugh while the hokage just tried to not smile and Guy let out a booming "YOUTH."

"I might not be able to beat you, but I can at least show you that I'm stronger then when I was at the academy." Ino said while brushing her hair backwards and imitating me.

I smiled at Ino and said." Okay, then show me what you got."

Ino instantly rushed me and started throwing punches and kicks from every angle she could. I either dodged them or used my hands to throw them to the side of me and put Ino off balance. Whenever Ino fell off balance I would run a finger along an opening to let her know where they were and I could see her becoming better with every attack. She was growing very fast, but she still had a number of things that she had a problem with that she couldn't seem to fix. For example, whenever I would grope her boobs or butt she would freeze up from it and leave herself open. Every time that happened I would move in and kiss her on the neck, cheeks, or mouth, which of course would cause her to become distracted. This all made the people watching uncomfortable as well, but I figured it was a bit of teenage fun between lovers anyways.

Ino finally got a little serious when she pretended to give me a hug and instead used the mind transfer technique. It got a little dicey for her there as what she did was going inside my mind, I'm not exactly the most sane or normal individual you can meet on normal days, but that is on the outside and the inside is so much worse.

Ino ended up lost in my memories and I had to go find her before she was lost forever.

When I finally found her she was staring at a memory of when I had a picture taken of my wives and my huge number of kids. I was about 37 at the time and we had a nice picnic that day.

"What is this Alex?" Ino asked in shock and confusion.

"Oh it's nothing much, it's from my previous life. You probably won't meet very many if any people who have memories from their previous lives. Though you can also think of me as a multi dimensional world walker, not that it would make much sense to you right now."

"Those kids, are they all yours, but how did you have so many? Also why does it look like they're all the same age and from a bunch of different moms? What the hell is going on Alex?"

"Well lets sit down and I'll tell you my story." I told Ino while creating a couple of chairs and a small table. Being in my own mindscape is the same as being in a world I can control at will, even more so since I had so much mental training in my past life that if I hadn't stopped my mind from countering Ino's attack she would have instantly been killed.

I then went on to tell Ino about myself. She took it pretty well, though she was shocked at the number of kids I had. She was actually more surprised about that then she was about me being over 100 years old and going to different worlds. Priorities really need to be assessed here.

"So that explains why you were trying to sleep with so many different women, and why you're so strong."

"Wait hold up now, what do you mean by that is why I keep sleeping with a bunch of women?" I asked a little bit irritated at the way she said that.

"Well from what I understand you are the last of the Senju bloodline, just like you were the last slayer. You know you will die and have the same mindset about it as you did before. Plus you even started sleeping around at the same age as before. From what I can tell, it's the same thing happening as when you were in that other world." Ino told me as if explaining the mysteries of the world.

The painful truth is that I think she is right. I thought I had changed, but maybe I've just gotten worse since the shinobi in this world actually encourage sexual relations in order to boost their numbers and to replace the dead ninja. So having one guy with a bunch of women even at the age of 13 is considered a great thing. This world is pretty messed up, but it is also understandable since if they didn't let that go on they might lose too many ninja and end up with their entire village dying.

"I'll admit that maybe I have a problem, but I'll try to solve it as best as I can. However I'm not going to abandon those I'm already in a relationship with." I told Ino seriously. I'll just ignore the sound of her clicking her tongue.

We spent a bit more time talking and I got her to promise not to tell others about this since I wanted to tell them on my own and she made me promise to marry her soon. I feel odd about being told to propose to someone or else.

"I think we spent enough time in my head for now. Lets go out Ino." I told her while grabbing her hand. It was nice to know she didn't judge me and would keep my secret. "Also don't ever try to use this on me again without letting me know ahead of time, if I hadn't noticed what you had been doing my minds defenses would have attacked you and you would have died."

Ino just nodded while having a thoughtful face.

After we got out Ino immediately noticed that pretty much all of the girls in the room were passed out and the women were just looking at me with a hungry glint in their eyes. A few of the guys had that same glint, which of course made me worry. The boys just looked at me with some jealousy.

Ino quickly turned to me to see why everyone was acting like that only to also faint from seeing me. I was wearing nothing but a pair of silk shorts which did nothing to hide my penis's shape. This and the finely sculpted body I had trained every day caused her to faint almost immediately. I hopped up and down a few times in victory while Asuma went and picked up Ino.

When I was jumping I noticed that all of the people with the eyes that looked dangerous followed my penis to a T. If I threw it left they went left, right, up, down, it didn't matter. I had thought I was safe and the only thing I had to worry about was Tsunade having sex with me. Now it looked like a lot of people were going to be after me. Also why was I in my underwear, I don't remember doing anything to strip. Maybe it was a subconscious thing.

After I was done with everything and went back upstairs while having cat calls and whistles thrown my way the chunin exams continued.

The rest of the chunin exams happened like in the series. Here's a list of the winners.

Sauske, Shino, Kurano, me, Temari, Shikamaru, Naruto, Neji, Gaara, and lastly Dosu.

I got pissed when Neji kept on spouting his bullshit about people not being able to change and destiny. Just because you got enslaved when you were a child by the main family doesn't mean that you can't change. You just never tried to change.

Listening to his crap while he beats on Hinata, who is literally the kindest ninja in the whole dang world made me want to beat him into the ground. It would be one thing if he was doing it to show her how cruel you have to be sometimes to be a ninja, but it was basically just him whining about his own fate.

As for Hinata, well hopefully she gets better soon. I think I'll send her some romantic comedy books I've been writing in my free time. I bet she'll love them.

The battle between Gaara and Lee was amazing in the sense that Gaara has little to no Taijustsu skills, but his defense makes up for that and he has super strong Ninjutsu skills. Lee however has no Ninjutsu skills, but has super powerful Taijutsu skills. They are complete opposites and were a perfect match up to test themselves. The only reason Gaara won as far as I can tell was that Lee tried to end the match quickly and didn't take him to be as much of a threat as he should have. I mean seriously, who fights a match against someone as strong as Gaara while wearing weights.

What Lee should have done is to take his weights off and then fight Gaara like that. The shields he has have a hard time keeping up with his speed and cost chakra to keep fixing and moving around. All he would need to do is keep attacking like that and he could have wore down Gaara's chakra to a point that his sand would no longer be able to protect him. Then he could use his other moves so that way they would be effective.

Once all of the fights were over it was time to draw lots. I ended up drawing a lot for Gaara. This was going to be rough. Also I'm sorry Naruto, but honestly I think I'll be able to talk no jutsu Gaara even better then you did. Unfortunately this also means that things are going to be skipped ahead for the attack on the village. I'll need to do some prep work here quickly.

That was it for the preliminaries for the final part of the exam. After that was a month long time to rest and train. I just went home with Tsunade since Sauske was going to be going to the hokage and the hospital to deal with his seal some more and afterwards he was planning to train with Kakashi.

Naruto was going to be training with Ebisu and Jiraya. I wanted to meet Jiraya and get his knowledge, unfortunately he wouldn't share any of it with me unless I was his direct disciple and that wasn't going to happen. The only other way was to do my own studies, which would be pretty easy seeing as you need to study the human body for medical ninjutsu and a number of others. Though it is sad that he won't teach me since a lot of time will be wasted on learning stuff. I also need to try and learn about any jutsu's or Genkai that have been found. I guess it will expand my knowledge quite a bit, but it'll be a lot of work.

I spent the next month learning about the muscles in the human body and everything concerning them, from how they grow to how they decay. It was interesting and the new training I had come up with would make both Guy and Lee beyond happy.

Speaking of Lee, Tsunade had taken a look at him and then had me take a look for my training. I found out that Lee was actually capable of using jutsu's if he wanted, his chakra veins were simply not able to hold the amount of chakra he was trying to force through them. He would use his chakra like he would his body, trying to push it to the maximum. His chakra veins couldn't handle the load and his subconscious started to reduce the amount he had so that he wouldn't end up killing himself. I went and told him this and he told me his chakra didn't matter to him so long as his body was fixed since all his learning was for physical fighting anyways. Damn try hards.

I told him not to worry since Tsunade and I could fix him, though the new fix would be tough for him since it was basically taking his shattered bones and putting them back together again like a giant 3D puzzle. If said puzzle was constantly changing and attempting to combine with the other pieces to form new shapes. He was in for a hell of a time since we would need to break any pieces that did connect back together to put it in the right spot.

I used the time treating Lee to study his muscles and organs and asked him about his training style. We ended up learning a lot since I also told him about my own training style and gave him some pointers on how he could improve his own. When Guy heard what I had said to Lee he had yelled about youth and went to go and try out my advice. It worked really well and he loved the new idea.

I even had Lee work on a training that he could do while in the hospital. I had him flex his muscles in his not broken parts of his body and told him that it would not only help the muscles to become more flexible and keep him from losing any due to not being able to go out and train, but that it could also help him to find new muscles to train that he wouldn't normally use and could even allow him to have fine muscle control that could allow his body to move instantly even when tied up. He liked the idea.

I had since then came up with a number of ways that the fine muscle control could be used that would be insanely overpowered in a world full of shinobi. The least of which would be being capable of changing your looks, just like a metamorphmagus could or using it to escape by collapsing your bones like what Orochimaru does. Though to use the muscles like him you would need to also have flexible bones or your bones would end up shattered because of the pressure from your own muscles.

I had begun training my muscles during this past month and had made a ton of growth. I was planning to start training my organs next by having my muscles repeatedly put pressure on them to cause them to become more durable. I would of course need to be very careful when I did this since if I put to much pressure it could cause damage that might even instantly kill me. The upside to training my organs however is that they would work a ton better and would even be less likely to be damaged even if someone were to directly attack them. Internal attacks are no joke.

I also studied the body of Yoroi before they cremated him. It wasn't difficult to see his body since he had no family members to visit him, but checking out his chakra veins and getting ahold of the medical report was a bit more difficult. I had to wait for the opportune time to look through the report and I'm sure that the ANBU watching his body to see if Orochimaru would come for it had reported me to the hokage and Tsunade. I didn't find out much since the way he used chakra to absorb others chakra wasn't able to be checked without having him use the skill in front of me. I was able to tell from his chakra paths which ones he used the most and that at least gave me a start.

I had learned as many defensive Fuinjutsu's as I could and had made an array to protect the buildings in the village from damage above a certain level and had gotten permission from the hokage to set it up as an emergency measure after I had it checked by the R and D lab. They had already told me that if I ever wanted to join R and D that I could do so at any point in time whether I became a chunin or not and I would receive payment and status equal to a head researcher. They were impressed at all of the things I kept coming up with and with how I had reorganized the library.

The formation I had made would charge up using the ambient chakra in the surroundings and would only grow stronger over time, however it would take a year to charge enough to be used or would require ninja to provide chakra to charge it faster. The hokage had any shinobi who weren't on missions and were trustworthy to put their chakra into the formation whenever they could while still keeping enough for them to not appear any weaker. I also put in quite a bit every day and noticed that after a week there was enough to have the formation activate for ten minutes. It would last longer the more chakra we put in and there was still a week until the final exam.