Now what ?
This piece takes place right after the BDM, as Mal and River co-pilot Serenity into the black. It also refers mildly to deleted scenes from the movie and the novel "Life signs" by James Lovergrove (*).
WARNINGS: unbetaed, written in the spur of the moment on Valentine's day. Also, English is not my mother tongue, so bear with my colloquial mistakes
Serenity soared through the black. They had left Persephone and the repair dock four hours ago. River and Mal were all alone on the bridge, neither speaking, both of them just enjoying the quietness of the ship.
River yawned and brought the back of her hand before her opened mouth.
Mal noticed, "Tired?"
River nodded.
"That's new…" he said quietly, taking back control of the yoke.
River did not discuss and reclined on her seat, drawing her knees to her chest.
"Ever since Miranda," she started. "It's like a weight has come off of my shoulders, now I sleep."
"Well that's a good thing, little albatross," he acquiesced, "'t means you're getting closer to what the rest of us folk live like." He smiled, catching her eyes. "'s okay to go to your bed, you know. I'll set the automatic pilot, we have a clear path till Greenleaf, I can manage on my own."
"You should go to bed, too," she said, unfolding her limbs and raising from her seat.
"I'll go in a moment. I like the quiet."
River patted his shoulder then left the bridge quietly.
Mal sighed and reclined in the Pilot seat. He picked one of Wash's dinosaur toys and twirled it in his hands. Wash, Shepherd,…. He thought, his heart constricting a little Damn, Alliance, damn Blue Sun for all those meaningless deaths, damn them all for the Reavers, and damn them for taking away two of my crew! He slammed the toy back on the control top a bit forcefully, making the other ones shake. He rearranged them more gently and closed his eyes.
The last step leading to the bridge creaked, making him whip the pilot seat back as Zoe came to the bridge, "Zoe!"
"Sorry, Sir, I just…. I couldn't sleep…" she said, leaning on the armrest of the seat River had vacated a few minutes ago.
Mal orientated his seat so he could see her.
Zoe sighed. "It's just… it's too raw. Everything in our… in my cabin reminds me of him."
"As it should," he replied quietly.
"I know, I don't want to forget him. But I had been tossing for a while and I didn't want to take any of them pills Simon gave me"
"Sometimes it helps, you know. Maybe you should take them for now."
Zoe shook her head negatively. "I want to try and go without. If I don't manage, I'll take some."
Mal nodded understandably.
For a while, neither of them spoke, then Zoe sat down, looking out the windshield, "I'm pregnant."
Mal's head whipped, "what?..."
"I'm keeping it," she continued, "Wash is gone, and this is the only thing I have left."
"Zoe, of course!" Mal interrupted. "I would never ask you to…"
"Good."
"How?..." he searched for his next words. "How did you find out?"
"Doc did a routine blood test after my injury. He didn't particularly screen those markers, but they appeared on the results anyway. I'm in the early stages, probably five to six weeks. I thought I was late because of all the stress…"
"I'm gonna protect you, Zoe…"
"I don't want no special treatment, Sir, I'm pregnant, not impaired."
"I ain't saying that you are, Zoe, but if there's heavy lifting involved, let us men folk do the work. Simon needs to build his muscle anyway, and I won't take it out on you if you feel tired and want to take a nap or two. As for the shootin', 'times like these, we're gonna try and avoid them core worlds much as we can. We stroke more than the embers, Zoe, 's bound to be bumpier 'n usual and the Alliance won't leave it at that."
Zoe nodded in understanding, "No they probably won't."
"There's jobs for us on the Border and the Rim, I'm sure," Mal resumed, "We have to lay low for a time and see what comes our way, and the operative left us with some hefty coin, we c'n keep flying for a while."
"He gave us money, too?" Zoe sounded surprised.
Mal shrugged, "said he wouldn't need it where he went, and despite my not too subtle comment about crossing paths with him, left a bag full of credits when I was not looking."
"Oh, well, that's something at least," Zoe said.
Mal smiled, nodding, "and congratulations for the baby, though it's not the most appropriate thing to say right now, it still holds special meaning."
"… and we got a doctor on board…" she added.
"And we got a doctor on board," he concurred, "who has now more interest to stay than a few weeks ago, if I may add."
Zoe gave a hint of a smile, "yeah, he finally got it together."
Mal smiled and turned back to the darkness of space.
"So what are you waiting for?" she asked.
"Huh?" Mal replied, turning back to face her.
"Three people are currently not sleeping on that boat, you, me, and an ex-companion in the galley." Zoe replied pointedly.
"Ex-companion? What…"
"She didn't tell you?" she continued, "well I guess it's not my place to discuss it with you, Sir, but Inara's all alone in the galley, you might as well ask her yourself."
"Zoe…"
"Go, Mal…" she said gently, "I'll manage the bridge and notify you if anything goes wrong."
Mal sighed, "I guess I got no other choice, have I?"
"Not unless you want me to call you a coward, Sir," she teased.
Mal shook his head and released the controls before standing up. "She's yours, Zoe, we still got a few hours left, I don't want to push the old girl while Kaylee's otherwise-err… occupied, and we just got her out of dock." He made for the door.
"No worries, Sir."
"… and Zoe?"
She turned to him "Yes?"
"Thanks…"
She held his look, nodding slightly, and turned back to the stars.
Mal went down the metal stairs and further down to the galley.
The sliding door was partially opened, and he could see Inara sitting at the table in front of a cup, probably of tea, if the tray holding a delicate porcelain teapot and bamboo whisk were anything to go by.
He stopped to observe her for a short while before widening the passage and stepping inside, sliding the door shut behind him.
Inara seemed a bit startled, "Mal? I thought you were on the bridge…"
"I was, Zoe took over," he stepped further inside.
"Oh, so that's where she was going."
"Yeah, she mentioned you were on your lonesome in the galley," he continued, pulling back a chair and sitting down backwards, facing her, "said you were no companion no more…"
"I…"
Mal raised his index finger before his lips in a shushing gesture. "Shh, let me do the talking for once. Last time you did, I thought you were saying something which you appeared you were not, so I'm gonna speak plain and simple this time."
"You're not making any sense…"
"Shh-'Nara," he continued, "looks like we've always been at odds when we shouldn't have. After Nandi, I understood, really I did," he said upon seeing her raised eyebrows, "unlike popular belief I'm not so dense that I am insensitive to other people's emotions, or fits of jealousy…" He looked pointedly at her. "Nandi was a breath of fresh air at a time you couldn't deliver, and I was not 'bout to accept anyway, and even if you had other reasons, I was not aware of them at that time, so that's what I'll go with."
"It's not entirely false either," she said.
"When we were by that lake on Bellophoron," he resumed, "after you took that experimental drug, I was ready for more, Inara, but once again, you used that lavish mouth o'yours to confuse my good intentions and off we went on different paths again."
"I didn't even like Sinhon that time around," she admitted, "didn't feel like home anymore."
"Christ, woman! Will you let me get a word in edgewise?!" he stood-up, frustrated. "I was gorram ready to propose, Nara! Had the speech all ready in my head, was even going to lay down a knee and pop the question!"
He looked her in the eyes then.
By the looks of her, she was not expecting a proposal.
"Yes, Inara Serra, I was going to go old-fashioned on one knee and pop the question," he repeated, "I was going to ask Shepherd Book to do something useful and bind us petty thief and whor – Companion, in less-than-holy matrimony, and God forbids I ain't come to my senses because here I am now, asking you the same, but there's no shepherd no more and there's no witness but the entire crew of that boat, or what is left of them battered souls. So," he took her hand and descended on one knee, "will you?"
Inara's eyes filled with tears, and then she smiled and joined him on the floor, reaching for his neck with her other hand before bringing her lips to his.
"I, Inara Serra, accept to take thee, Malcom Reynolds, to be my dedicated petty thief," she murmured against his lips.
"… and I, Malcolm Reynolds, accept to take thee, Inara Serra, to be my undoing…"
"Mal!"
He laughed and kissed her hard, "… to be my dedicated companion…"
"I'm not a companion anymore," she said breathlessly, between kisses that were becoming more urgent.
"True, you're mine," he said before laying her on the ground.
"Maybe we should go to your cabin?" she asked with difficulty as she discovered the man had quite the expert hands.
"This first…"
*Fade to Black*