Disclaimer: Characters belong to Shonda Rhimes and Grey's anatomy. I keep borrowing them just to have fun writing stories. I hope you enjoy this one too
Chapter 7: "Forgotten memories are not lost forever."
Arizona felt that the subject of the ex-wife and divorce was difficult for Doctor Torres, she didn't want to pry, so she had changed her conversation
- So, this prosthesis, when can I see it?
- I have had to fix it. You damaged it when you fell, now it's waiting for you in the rehabilitation room.
- Oh my God, but you are my savior Calliope! What would I do without you? Laughing, the blonde declaims theatrically, while the appearance of a wrinkle between the brunette's eyebrows revealed that she was facing a worry. What's going on, Calliope?
- Arizona you must understand that, due to the injury to your shoulder and ribs...You... you can't use crutches to get around, ... And you know, carrying you in my arms through the hospital is clearly not an option.
So, ... And I know you hate it, and I'm sorry, but you're gonna need to use the wheelchair. Waiting at every moment for a change of mood from her ex-wife who would suddenly send everything overboard; crutches, wheelchair and also her orthopedic surgeon; Callie was walking on eggshells around everything that could remind the blonde of her disability.
- Okay! Let's go... Answers the blonde with a casualness that dumbfounds the Latin... Don't give me that face, Calliope. It's not a drama, even though I admit that I am really disappointed that you do not plan to carry me. Arizona broke out of laughter... But you must push, I don't think I''ll be very efficient to ride with one hand.
- At your service madam... Bringing the wheelchair closer, Callie lets a sigh of relief escape between her tight lips.
When they arrive in the rehabilitation room, holding the prosthesis in her hands, Callie positions herself in front of Arizona. The blonde suddenly mute, seemed flummoxed.
- Uh... Arizona, you need to take your pants off.
Flabbergasted, the blonde did not leave the prosthesis of the eyes, scrutinizing it as if she had never seen one before. Seeming to hesitate, she blushes abruptly.
- Arizona, we need to set it up...It ...It can't be done on your pants... Explains Callie in a shy and hesitant voice… and ... I don't know if you remember how to do it. If ...if it makes you more comfortable, I can go out and let you try it alone, or ... I...I can show you... We do it the easiest way for you... You just have to tell me.
- I... I guess, I did not really figure it. This thing is really my leg now?!... Asks Arizona , the sobs she was holding back expressing her emotion... It's... it's a little.
The blonde didn't know how she felt about this assembly of carbon and steel that was supposed to replace her leg, but it wasn't pleasant. As for Callie, her smile had faded, she understood that the ease with which things had gone, seemed obviously too good to be true and that it was from now on, that the problems would start again. Arizona's barely audible words call out the Latin woman
- Could you help me put it on, please Dr Torres. Asks Arizona by pulling down her pants, the voice suddenly marked with a insecurity that the Latin woman was rediscovering with pain.
Callie kneels down in front of the blonde. After helping to remove the pants, she sets up the prosthesis. She didn't have to look up, to know that Arizona was studying every move she made.
The prosthesis barely in place the blonde rises abruptly, Callie rushes to hold her.
- Hey, wait. Be careful Arizona! Falling down right now is not an option.
Grabbing her shoulders, as she supported her ex-wife from behind, Callie watched the mirror in front of them, where Arizona was looking at herself without saying a word.
She was taking the time to examine everything, coldly apprehending this new image of herself that she had already taken so long to appropriate but no longer knew.
Callie could see the emotions passing through the blue eyes, there were no tears, but as she had seen so often, Arizona's face was impassive and closed and as she had been so often, Callie was frightened facing this angry stranger she had however so loved.
Hoping to get her ex-wife's attention, she scrapes her throat, not only knowing if Arizona could hear her.
- Uh... Arizona, this is the prosthesis you use every day to walk and run or when you have to stand for a long time in the O.R, and you see, the knee is electronic. You can control it from your smart phone, as required. It... It makes you totally independent. And I know... I know it's a lot to accept again, and how difficult it must be... But I swear, Arizona, you can lead exactly the same life you used to. No one ever can imagine you have lost a leg. Even if, still staring at her image in the mirror she seemed unattainable; the small nodding of Arizona's head, motivated Callie to go on... And you have another more aesthetic for your heel shoes.
It looks so much like your other leg that when you wear a dress even a little short, nobody can't even notice it...You... you're as beautiful and sexy as ever. Oh God I swear, you are really, really hot Arizona. And then you have also a waterproof one, you use it for the shower, you hate the seat. Arizona please, believe me, this prosthesis takes nothing away from the person you are.
The blonde finally lifted her eyes to cross in the mirror the black eyes that were shining too although the Latina was doing her best to hold back the tears threatening to run down her cheeks.
Callie would have given much so that her ex-wife would not have to relive this moment, not having to relive it herself and never again see the pain pass over this face that laughed a few minutes ago.
- It's okay, Calliope... It's going to be okay... Says the blonde with a half-smile that told she wasn't as sure about that as she wanted to let it appear. Arizona sneers... Since you just told me I was beautiful and hot, I guess I can call you Calliope even if we are in the rehab room Dr Torres.
The weight of a ton which compressed her chest had just flown away, Callie lets escape a liberating chuckle, at the joke of her ex-wife.
- Maybe, I would have confused myself on the stroke of the emotion between the best friend and the Doctor
- Always a lot of emotion inside you, isn't it Dr Torres? ... Said Arizona smiling tenderly to the brunette through the mirror. The blue eyes dived into the black eyes and the intensity of the moment brings up a lot of strong memories in the brunette's mind, Arizona's voice suddenly taking her out of her journey into the past. Are we going to try to walk or are we going to stand like idiots in front of that mirror?
- Yeah, you're right. Let's go! First between the bars. I'm standing in front of you, you can't count on your left arm right now, so you have to trust me, okay? Don't be afraid if you lose your balance, I'll grab you.
- I don't know if I'm right or wrong, but with you, Doctor Calliope, I'm not afraid.
Teasing Callie and her desire to compartmentalize her roles; Arizona giggles, ignoring that in fact, it mainly helped her ex-wife not to fall from the wire on which like a tightrope walker she was walking since her arrival in Seattle.
On the walking track Arizona tried with the utmost seriousness to take a step. Resting her weight on her right foot, she concentrated so hard to move her left foot forward that she was biting the tip of her tongue between her teeth, exactly like Sofia did, when she tried to color inside the line.
Callie looked at her taking her first steps again, with a great tenderness. It was so different from the first time, the frown did not express the anger that had ended up destroying their love, but only the blonde's worry to do well, relying on the Latin in trust.
As her ex-wife moved forward with growing ease, Callie thought how well she had felt since she was in Seattle.
Despite all the doubts that remained about Arizona's situation and about the way to bring her past and especially Sofia back into her life without rushing anything and without spoiling this friendship that they were building; the brunette had not felt so light for years.
The two women had never been friends before.
Love had immediately entered their lives like a cannonball, exploding into thousands of stars of happiness and then, of pain.
Thereafter they became cordial ex-wives, and then, ex-wives who were tearing each other apart in court, and finally, and that was probably the worst, ex-wives who ignored each other.
Callie realized that this relationship based on trust was what she had missed the most, and losing Arizona's trust had certainly been the most painful in their failure.
- It's easy. I get there perfectly. Proud of herself arriving at the end of the track, the blonde laughed.
- Yeah, that's great. Taking a breath that she didn't realize she held back, Callie was also laughing... Look at you, it seems that this part is not forgotten. But please, tuck your tongue in, if you fall and cut yourself a piece of tongue, you'll be really disabled this time! ... since apparently you are "never single!"
The Latina winking at her ex maliciously insisted on the «never»; mocking the smugness that the blonde had displayed about it, since she came out of coma. She couldn't deny, that it had also annoyed her a little.
She was not jealous, she had no rights to do so, but she had always hated picturing Arizona with other women and after being divorced for three years, she had to admit that this feeling was still present...I wouldn't want to be sued for professional negligence by all the girls lining up for you. Said Callie for being funny.
Chuckling while blushing a little, Arizona lets go of the bars that supported her, wanting to hit in a playful manner the Latin's arm for her dirty insinuations she loses the balance forward. At the last minute, Callie catches up her, bursting with laughter. Leaning her head against Callie's shoulder, Arizona was laughing too...I was obviously referring to the fact that you are extremely talkative and that your exciting speech would be a great loss for humanity!
Rising from her position and regaining her balance, pursed lip and a squinted eye frowning, the blonde seemed to be suddenly hermetic to Callie's jokes.
- Um... You changed your perfume, Dr Torres. I recognize this one. It reminds me of something or…Uh… someone but... I don't see very well
Callie froze, the emotion was visible in the black eyes.
The two women were still looking at each other intensely, when the phone in the brunette's medical gown pocket starts ringing. Seeming not to have heard it, Callie did not react continuing to stare at Arizona as if the sky was going to fall on their heads.
-Uh... I ... I think it's your phone Calliope. Maybe you should answer. Brought back to reality by Arizona's words, the Latin woman grabs the phone, her shoulders sagging when she becomes aware of the caller.
- Yeah, sorry... Said Callie, blowing. I... I have to take this call.
- Sure, go ahead. I'll sit down and rest a bit. The blonde offered a big smile to the orthopedist
Even if she had stepped away, as the discussion progressed the tone of the Latin rose enough making the words she was saying very clear from where Arizona was standing.
- No, Penny, I can't go home right now... Oh!... trust me, I know... I 'm fully aware that Seattle is thousands of miles from New York and also you don't believe in long-distance relationships... For God sake!... I've been gone for barely three days... Yes, Arizona is out of a coma but... But ...I'm in the rehabilitation room with her...
The blonde tried not to listen, but when Callie mentioned her first name, she couldn't help but wonder what she was doing in this conversation. She heard the exasperation in the voice of the Latina who started pacing in the room. That's not it ... No... You don't understand... I take care of ... She is... No Penny ... Listen, I can't talk about that right now, I'll call you back.
When she came back to Arizona, Callie looked really upset. The blonde wondered about the attitude she was supposed to adopt. Should she say something or pretend not to have heard anything? Given the decibels of the Latin's voice,it was really not credible thinks Arizona.
- Uh... Lover's quarrel? Arizona grins awkwardly
- Quarrel in any case... Callie replies coldly, not wanting to dwell further on the person who had interrupted.
- I... I didn't want to listen, but you were talking a little loud. So...
- Yeah, it's a part of me you haven't seen yet. Callie was running her hands through her hair nervously…Well, not since you lost your memory anyway.I get angry pretty easily. It's not the most exciting part of my personality, so you can keep forgetting about it...
The blonde was a little surprised, the Latin seemed to be a hothead temper. Even if it confused her, she found it rather sexy. She was intrigued by this personality she craved to discover even deeper. She had always preferred this kind of temperament to the shy one, thinking that behind this deep emotionality poorly mastered, there was always a sensitive and interesting being.
-Uh ... You look upset and I thought that you should know that when you'll not...you'll see that there...
Callie sniffs, concluding the sentence she could never forget.
- ...there will be people lining up for me, right?
- Uh... yeah... uh...I guess... yeah... More and more disoriented both by the attitude and by the words of the orthopedist, Arizona shrugs a shoulder... If that's what you want ... But I was going to say that you'll see that there are more serious things in live... Quarrels between people who love each other happen and then they get better. If it worth, you have to make it work...
- And if we stopped talking and get back to work . The brunette replies sharply, wishing to put an end to this conversation which was putting her in a completely confusion.
The Latin woman no longer knew what part of her life it was about. Arizona was talking about Penny, and she was thinking about Arizona. Suddenly, the fact that her ex-wife was pushing her into someone else's arms became unpleasant to her.
Her eyes in the wave she remembers that one day she had imposed on her the spectacle of "steak knife" kissing her in the hall of the hospital, forcing the one who was still her wife and with whom she had shared so much, to accept that their story was over.
- I' m sorry. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable, or to intrude. I mean you do so much for me. I just wanted to be a good friend, too, Callie. That's all. Arizona spoke sweetly with a childish pout on her face
- It's okay Arizona, you don't have to apologize. It's complicated right now. My life is always a fucking mess, anyway... Sneers the brunette bitterly. Her face softens, rewarding the blonde with a tender smile... And I thank you for being such a good friend.
- I always try . They say I'm a great friend... I... I can't help but try to fix things when I see sad people...
Delighted to change the topic of conversation Callie was laughing.
- I know Arizona that you always do that.I mean I'm not the one who lost memory
- ... About that, Callie, I was thinking...Uh... Do you think I have a phone like your? I mean the phone I remember is pretty simple. It's only used to phone and to send text, but I don't have pictures like in your, and I don't see people when they phone, I only hear them. Your girlfriend's pretty, by the way. I don't remember her, even though she apparently knows me.
Still smiling, the blonde was not losing one opportunity to throw some bait to try to bring back on her fishing rod the slightest detail that would enlighten her about her Callie had become a master in the art of evading disturbing conversations lately.
- Oh ... Uh... Sure. All these things have changed a lot in ten years.For sure, you have a state-of-the-art phone. I'll show you how it works. But you know what's funny is that between the two of us, the geek is you. You are always looking for the latest app, you always have your nose on your phone or on your tablet...Uh… Of course, you don't know what a tablet is either...
- Maybe my phone is at my place and you could bring it to me. Maybe there are pictures and I'll... I'll learn a little more about my life, because... Uh ...Really, I wonder how to find all those lost memories, Calliope.
- Arizona, you... You have just recognized my perfume
- Yeah, I know it ... It's ... Grey from Dior. I... I love it. I mean, I don't use it on me. But it's really perfect for you. I don't see what...
- It was not released yet in 2007.
- Oh then... You mean ... It's... It would be a memory coming back.Arizona's eyes were suddenly lit up
The Latin, half worried half happy, nodded. She wanted Arizona to regain her memory and Sofia to regain her place in her mother's life, but she couldn't help but fear what would happen to this budding friendship when the blonde remembered their heavy history, and find out she's been lying to her face since days.
Invigorated by this beginning of hope, Arizona gets up
- Come on, let's start again. Now I can try without the bars
- A little more with the bars...
- Oh, you're not funny Calliope. I want to learn how to run!
- Before you knew how to walk? That doesn't sound like the Dr Robbins I know.
- I never reveal all my secrets on the first date... Winking mischievously over her shoulder Arizona walked away in quick steps. Before trying to catch up with her ex-wife, the Latina takes the time to recover her breathing which had just stopped for a few seconds.
-Arizona slow down. Hold on, wait for me...
Arizona had gone back and forth on the track with the bars and had walked around the room many times. She was progressing very quickly, recovering with a disconcerting ease the plantar supports with which she had had to fight so much, five years earlier. Visibly, this part of her memory was intact, the blonde's walk was so fluid, that Callie even allowed her to come back to the room without the chair. Proudly, the blonde leaned only on Callie's arm and barely limped.
- Thank you, Calliope. I had fun this afternoon.
- It was supposed to be a serious job...
- And it was. Look, even though I'm gonna miss your fun transport to the bathroom, I learned to move around on my own and I recognized your perfume. I... I'm sure this is the beginning of something.
Callie smiled, the Latin woman might not have put the same meaning as Arizona behind this «something» that was starting or starting again or waking up in her.
In any case apart from Penny's interruption, the brunette was forced to admit that she had also had fun this afternoon; and at that point, she didn't know if it was right or wrong, but she felt that both of them were retraining their memory. Arizona slaps on the brunette's arm.
- Hey, you're still dark, Dr Torres! ... You know, I don't want to be locked between the four walls of my room... Arizona had pulled out her sulky lip of a sorrowful child, which Sofia imitated perfectly when she sought to crack her Latin mother... Can I invite my best friend for coffee?
- Great idea! A few steps from here, there is a tea room that you love... Uh ... Do you think you will still be able to walk more?
- Of course! Getting closer to Callie to cling to her arm and start the ride, the blonde moans... Humm... I dreamed of getting out of here, breathing in some fresh air and feel the sun warming my skin ... Callie swallows, and closes her eyelids trying to chase away the culpable sensations that pervaded her.
This ability that Arizona had, to move from the child to the sexy woman in a second, had always sent butterflies all over her body, and that was exactly what was happening right now... I feel like I've been locked up for months
- You...You've only been awake for three days.
- I know, I have not lost my immediate memory. Just ten years of my life ... Laughs Arizona... I said... The blonde stops her walk to point her index finger towards the brunette and assert her point of view with a bit arrogance making Callie chuckle ... I get the impression!
Leaning on the railing of the balcony that overlooked the lobby, Meredith and Alex watched the two women tightly huddled together, heading towards the hospital exit by laughing. Sharing a meaningful look, the two surgeons sigh .
In the tea room, Callie was watching Arizona's reactions.
When they were together and wanted to be alone, it was one of the places where they loved to come and share a hot drink, intertwine their fingers and eat each other with their eyes, without the unwelcome interruption of a colleague. Callie was visibly more upset to find herself in this place than Arizona, who for her part, was particularly interested in the excessive amount of desserts offered there.
- Let me buy it. Find us a place while I 'm ordering. That must not have changed in ten years. I should be able to remember how to do it. Chuckles the blonde, with sparks in her eyes as if she had been deprived of liberty for a year... Uh... Callie, coffee at this hour will keep you awake, you'd rather have a cup of tea, wouldn't you? Asks innocently Arizona
Wondering if Arizona really presumed or remembered this detail, the Latin froze
Indeed, from 4 pm, unless she worked at night and had to stay awake. the brunette no longer drank coffee at the risk of spending a sleepless night. Callie's eyes get lost in memories. This small intolerance to caffeine after 4 pm , had been at the origin of many sexy nights. Smiling as she escaped to those distant moments, the Latin remembered having prevented Arizona from sleeping many times, while she had abused the coffee. Her mind was plagued to these pictures when Arizona approached the table.
- Hey! You're not really with me right now, Calliope! The Latina sighs letting out a laugh, she was totally with her, but in another time and another story, and especially in another outfit... Since you didn't answer me, I ordered you a tea and a cranberry pie, I took for me an apple pie with whipped cream, because I only eat my mother's cranberry pies. My mother makes the best cranberry pies in the world! They are absolutely DE . LI. CIOUS...and ...
- Oh really? You'll have to cook me one then...
- Pfff ... The blonde raises a shoulder and winces... Mine are never as good as my mother's...
Callie bursts with laughter in memory of the many times she had seen Arizona make this mimic that only belonged to her, and also remembering Sofia's laugh just a few days ago when she told her little girl the story of the pies.
- What? What is so funny?
- Nothing, you make me think of my daughter, she makes that kind of pout too
- Hey ! Are you saying I'm acting like a seven-year-old? Whatever, the main thing is to chase away the worry of this face and see you laugh... With a mischievous smile, from the tip of her index finger Arizona takes a little whipped cream over her pie and smears the tip of Callie's nose, laughing out loud when she saw the stunned face of the Latina. Are you feeling better?
- Totally... Callie was laughing heartily too at her ex-wife's childish games
- See, I told you I was a great friend...
Arizona kept on laughing, and as if the last five years had never existed, naturally removing the whipped cream that she had put on Callie's nose, she licked her finger to clean it. In front of her, the brunette seemed not to know where she was at anymore.
Arizona wasn't even flirting, she was just going back to the way she had been before the crash; spontaneous, naturally funny, sweet and kind. However, raising in Callie sensations with which the brunette neither wanted nor could treat, all this did not help her to keep distance and Meredith's words were running through her head... "You never knew how to resist her, you always come back to her and after a while you suffer and you leave her again. You are hurt, you are hurting her and she is hurting you back; that's always that's been going on throughout your story..."
She also had to remember that it had led her to live now in New York with Penny Blake.
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