TW: biphobia
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Too many bottles of this wine we can't pronounce
Too many bowls of green, no lucky charms
The maids come around too much
Parents ain't around enough
- Frank Ocean
The week went by fast. But one thing was on all of Seattle Grace Highs mind. The first home football game of the season, which was today.
"You coming to the game dimples," Some guy from geometry that's been trying to get in her pants asked.
"I have on my cheer uniform, so I have no choice but to go," Arizona said looking in the small mirror in the corner of her locker.
"Oh, so I'll see you there then?" he asked.
"Everyone will see me there," Arizona said pushing him out the way.
"So, you're playing hard to get, I like," he said.
"This nobody giving you trouble," mark asked.
"No mark," Arizona said only because she knew mark would kill him.
"Ok but you should go," mark said jumping in the kids face.
"Mark, you didn't have to scare him like that," Arizona said grabbing her bag.
"Well, he wouldn't stop messing with you," Mark said taking Arizona's bag from her.
"Ok I guess let's go before I regret this," Arizona said.
"Regret what," mark asked genuinely confused following her.
"Being your friend," Arizona joked.
"Hey," mark said fake hurt as he got in his Jeep.
"You'll be okay," Arizona said closing the door of his
jeep.
"So, what's this pregame ritual you guys do," Arizona asked putting on her seatbelt.
"Nothing really, we just hang out till like 5 o'clock then we all head back to the school," Mark let her know.
"I could've done the same thing from my house except I could've squeezed a nap in," Arizona complained.
"You can nap at Grey's house," Mark said pulling into Meredith Grey's driveway.
It was easy to spot her house had the most cars by it.
"She lives really close to the school," Arizona said.
"Yeah, I don't understand why she drives when the school is just around the corner. I told her don't do it to save the world. And she was like, just cuz I saw one commercial about climate change doesn't mean you have to be an activist," mark rambled getting out of his car.
Arizona swung her backpack and put it on her back in one swift motion.
"You ready blondie," Mark asked?
"Yeah," Arizona said smoothing out her skirt.
"Hey Sloan," Derek greeted mark with a hug.
"What's up blondie," Derek offered a wave.
"Come in, we were just relaxing," Derek said inviting them in.
Normally Mark would've just walked into the house. The home was like the friend group's headquarters. It's the best hangout spot. He was used to the house. He was comfortable in it, he treated it as if it was his own home.
"Sup Robbins," Alex greeting her in the den area.
"Hey blondie," Izzie teased.
"You're blonde to don't you think the nickname will get confusing," Arizona asked?
"No because they never have called me blondie," Izzie said sitting back down in her spot on the couch.
"Weird," Arizona said before plopping down on the coach.
"Hey cheerleader," Callie teased.
She hated how the brown-haired person could make her whole mood change. She hated the grip the latin girl had on her.
"Hey football star," Arizona teased right back with a big grin.
"I think Zona's a tomato," Lexie joked.
"Stop it," Arizona said lightly hitting Lexie shoulder.
The continued to just relax. Some of them started on homework and or just slept. Izzie cooked food for all of them.
~~~~~~
"Callie Torres gets the 99-yard touchdown," the sport guy said on the loudspeaker.
Callie threw the ball down they all rushed over to her head butting her helmet.
The crowd stood up in an uproar, a mix of pride and disappointment. The band played the school song in celebration of the winning touchdown. Meredith and Arizona ran the school flag up and down the sidelines with the biggest smiles on their faces.
But the celebrations end and they go their separate ways. Arizona had heard about a party at Callie's house to celebrate the win, but she didn't plan to go.
"But I don't want to go to a party," Arizona told Lexie. Over the phone.
"Well Callie personally invited you. I know you wouldn't want to decline her invitation," Lexie said
"Well how about I take a raincheck," Arizona said
"Well how about you put on slutty dress and come down stairs," Meredith said.
"Wait where are you," Arizona asked.
"I'm in the car and we are picking up Alex, we're about 20 minutes out, get dressed," Lexie said.
"Well what about my mom, what do I tell since you have it all figured out," Arizona asked.
"I got it covered ,"Lexie said.
"I still find it weird that you got my moms phone number before you got mine," Arizona says
"Don't worry me and barb are tight," Lexie said.
"Are you already drunk," Arizona asked
"We pre partied at Mers," Addison said.
"But I'm not to drunk," Lexie said.
"Yes you are," Arizona said.
"Alright go get dressed so we can party," Lexie said
She sighed falling back on her bed. Why did Callie have to invite her to a stupid party? Why did Callie have to be so stupidly charming? Why did Callie have to be so hot she thought to herself as she got up to look for something to wear. She quickly put on a miniskirt and a metal band top on. She put her boots on a jacket for extra warmth. And she grabbed her con Dutch hat since she was too lazy to do her hair. Thankful she hadn't taken her makeup off when they called, or she wouldn't have gone. On second thought, maybe that isn't such a bad idea.
Before she could do anything, she got a text.
We're here.
She snuck downstairs not sure if her parents were up
"You don't have to sneak," Barbara said sitting on the couch.
"Sorry," Arizona said.
"It ok just be back tomorrow have fun," Barbara told her
Arizona gave her mom a look but just went with it. She left the house and got in a blue minivan outside.
"Who's minivan?" Arizona said.
"Mine," a guy in the driver seat answered.
"That's Avery, he's on the football team he's a wide receiver," Alex said
"Nice," Arizona said
" So why do I have to go to this party," Arizona asked in the back of some guys car?
"Because we just won," Addison reasoned.
"So," Arizona questioned?
"So, we celebrate but only the first win and homecoming," Addison explained.
"Ok but how does this involve me," Arizona asked.
"You're a cheerleader and Callie invited you," Addison reasoned.
"Ok well I'm already here so I'm not gonna bail," Arizona said
"You want some," Lexie asked passing a bottle of what seemed to be juice.
She took a drink when it hit her throat, she realized it wasn't just juice.
"Bleh eww," Arizona said handing the bottle back.
"It's vodka and fruit punch," Meredith said with a smirk on her face.
Arizona just gave a half smile. Why did she agree to this?
They pull up in front of this big house
"Woah this is Callie's," Arizona asked?
"Nope that's Callie's," Addison said pointing to the biggest house on the block.
"Wow," was all Arizona said.
"I know," Lexie said.
"Wait but why did we park so far back," Arizona said.
"So if it gets busted, we won't be close to the crime scene," Avery said.
"But we are farther away from the house wouldn't it take longer to get to,"Arizona asked.
"Oh, little one you have a lot to learn," Alex said patting Arizonas head.
"Hey, stop that," Arizona said before they walked through y the door.
"Wow," was all Arizona could say.
"I know," Addison said.
"Come on," mark said pulling the blonde toward the middle of the action.
"Arizona hey," Callie said.
"Hey Callie," Arizona said.
"So," Callie said awkwardly.
"So," Arizona said more like a question?
"Um how have you been," Callie asked?
"I've been good," Arizona said.
"Schools been good?" Callie asked.
"Yes, Callie, why are you being so formal with me? "Arizona asked, putting her hand on Callie's arm.
"We literally saw each other like 5 hours ago," Arizona commented.
Just one touch could make Callie melt. And of course, Callie couldn't tell her it's because I'm developing a crush on you, but I have a girlfriend. But when I look at you all I wanna do is kiss your face.
So, she just shrugged her shoulders.
"Oh, come on," Arizona said hit her arm.
"Ow," Callie faked
"I'll see you later," Arizona said before she moved to sit somewhere.
Callie watched as the short blond-haired girl bobbed through the crowd. Specks of blonde hair peaking from out of the crowd.
Arizona eventually made her way outside. Even though it was about 60 degrees there were still people in the pool. She only went outside to check out the scene, but she bumped into a familiar face.
"Oh, I'm sorry I wasn't paying attention," Arizona said.
"No, it's ok," the girl said with a thick Italian accent.
"Oh my gosh Carina hey," Arizona said awkwardly.
"Hey Arizona," carina said back not know what to do.
"You know I'm super sorry about what happened and how I acted," Arizona apologize.
"You know what I was mad at you but know I'm ok," Carina explained.
"That's great I'm sorry sometimes I can be a shitty person," Arizona said
"It's ok because I met someone new her name is maya," carina says.
"She's not here yet but I'll definitely introduce you two when I get the chance," Carina said
"Thats great," Arizona said before walking away.
She felt a hand latch on to hers.
"Come on take a shot with me," Alex said pulling her back inside towards the bar.
Alex had already had a few shots; you could tell by the way he poured the shot.
"Wait, what about the salt and lemon," Arizona asked.
"We don't need those that's for pussies," Alex said
"Ok," Arizona said this was her first time.
"Whatever you do don't stop drinking," Alex tells her.
"Bleeeh," Arizona made a face after she chugged the clear liquid.
"Dude I wish I had a camera," Alex laughed.
"You drunk it like it was water," Arizona commented.
"Yeah," Alex said
"I think you have a problem," Arizona said.
"You say problem I say talent," Alex said.
"Yeah I'm gonna go," Arizona said walking away.
"Blondie, come here," mark yelled.
"Yeah," Arizona said making her way over to him.
"You ever smoked before," mark said pulling out a perfectly rolled blunt.
"No," Arizona said.
"Oh ok," mark said light the blunt.
"What do you mean oh ok," Arizona asked?
"Nothing Zona," Lexie said sitting on the other side of mark.
"It's cool I was just going to share," mark said before taking a hit.
"Oh, well maybe I wanna try," Arizona said.
"No, you don't, this is strong, it's not for beginners," mark said passing the blunt to Lexie.
It was an odd site seeing the studious brown-haired girl taking in a hit of the leaf rolled blunt. When she first met her if someone told her Lexie Grey smoked weed. She would've asked them are were high. Lexie Grey was ever parents dream child. She got A's, she skipped a few grades, she's respectful. But here she was sitting on some couch in Callie's house taking a fat rip on the blunt.
"Yea I wouldn't really recommend," Lexie said letting the smoke into the air.
"Addison you smoke too," Arizona asked as she watched the red head put the blunt to her mouth.
"If you knew my mother you would understand," Addison said blowing the smoke through her nose.
"Man, this is wild," Arizona said confused. She was also slightly drunk.
"What," Lexie said laughing.
"You guys' smoke," Arizona said.
"And you drink," mark said taking the blunt back from Addison.
"I'm not saying it's bad I'm just so surprised cuz you seem so perfect," Arizona said.
"Let me take a hit Sloan," Cristina said appearing from the corner.
"You are such a fiend," mark said handing the blunt.
"If you want to get Cristina attention, just get some weed," Addison joked.
"Oh my gosh you smoke too," Arizona said.
"Yeah, I got the pressure from my parents to be the perfect child and my dad died when I was like 8, I got trauma," Cristina said before taking a long hit from the blunt.
"Yo, you didn't put in on this," mark said taking the blunt out of Cristina mouth.
"Hey," Cristina whined.
"This is wild," Arizona said perplexed.
"We human just like you," mark said put the blunt up to his mouth.
"I wanna try," Arizona said with her hand out like a child
"No Zona, this is big kid stuff," Addison said jokingly.
"Let the blonde try it," Cristina said with a smirk.
"No Cristina," Lexie said.
"I wanna try," Arizona repeated.
"You don't have to try it cuz we're doing it," mark said handing the blunt to Lexie.
"We won't like you any less if you don't smoke it," Lexie said before taking a rip.
"Yeah, Callie doesn't smoke even though I could benefit her. But we don't like her any less cuz she doesn't," mark said trying to make a point but the weed was slowly taking over.
"But I can't be that bad you're like not even affected," Arizona said.
"Yeah, but we're kinda Immune to it," Addison said taking the blunt from Lexie.
The blunt was almost gone and Arizona wanted to take a hit.
"It's almost gone just let me take a hit," Arizona whined.
"Fine but you're gonna sit down on the couch for the next 15 minutes afterwards," mark said the effect of the weed barely affecting him.
"Here," Addie handed her the blunt.
When Arizona breathed the smoke in it hit her lungs it was like a fire entered her chest.
"Stop holding it and inhale," mark complained.
Arizona inhaled it then took a breather she doesn't know how but some smoke managed to come out of her nose. She started coughing and coughing hard like really hard.
"Arizona are you ok," mark asked coming to her side.
"Yeah I'm-," Arizona tried to speak before the coughing fits began again.
"Yeah, sit down," mark said guiding her to the couch.
"I'm fine," Arizona said trying to be a big girl.
"Yeah, like hell you're fine," mark said making her sit on the couch.
"Well, this was fun but I'm gonna go," Cristina said scurrying away.
Arizona sat but not for fifteen minutes. She lasted about 10 minutes till she got antsy.
"I need to go pee," Arizona said.
"Ok just a second," Lexie said.
"No I need to now," Arizona said getting up.
"Ok it's upstairs to the right," Mark told her.
She made her way through the crowded basement and walked up the stairs. But she couldn't find the bathroom so she walked up another set of stairs.
"Oh I'm so sorry I'm trying to find the bathroom," Arizona said
"No, it's ok," Callie said wiping her face.
Arizona realized it was Callie. She must've been crying.
"Are you ok," Arizona asked entering the room
"Um it just the alcohol I'm an emotional drunk," Callie lied.
"So, it has nothing to do with Erica grinding on a girl from Seattle Prep," Arizona asked.
"Yes," Callie answered
"Like yes It does or yes it doesn't, " Arizona asked
"Zona, I don't know," Callie said with her back turned to Arizona.
"Calliope," Arizona said with a smirk reading the certificate in front of her.
"Nobody calls me that my dad only calls me that when he's pissed," Callie said handing Arizona a water bottle
"I think it's pretty," Arizona said before drinking the water.
"I was the kid with a weird name," Callie said.
"Try explain to people that you're not named after a state especially when the people are kids," Arizona said
"And the constant moving," Callie started.
"Tell me about it," Arizona said.
"I didn't meet other kids until I was 7," Callie said.
"Seriously," Arizona asked
"Yeah, I was home schooled in my first couple of years, but my mom wanted me to go to school, my dad wanted me to be with him," Callie said making her way over to the balcony
"You close with your dad," Arizona asked?
"Yeah," Callie said with a somber tone looking into the distance.
"Me and my dad are close," Arizona said oblivious to Callie's feelings
Callie started to cry. The mention of her dad was a sore stop. Her dad very outwardly supports the church. And Callie was very outwardly bi, well outside of her home life. She didn't know what came over her, but all the new feels just rushed to her head like a brain freeze.
"Omg are you ok," Arizona came running to Callie's aid.
"Yeah, I'm ok I'm just a sad drunk," Callie said.
"But you aren't drunk or are you cuz I didn't see you drink but you could have prepartied like Lexie did," Arizona said rambling.
Callie just continued to cry. She tried to speak and say she fine that it was allergies or something. But it wouldn't have made sense.
"Do you want me to get Mark," Arizona asked she just sobbed.
"Umm do you want me to get Erica" Arizona asked?
She hated the girl but if it made Callie feel better, she would do it.
That just made the sobbing worse.
"Um how about we sit on the bed, and you can tell me what's wrong," Arizona said kinda serious.
Arizona wasn't drunk but she was a bit high. Or at least that's what she thought. So, she could handle this.
"Are you ok honey," Arizona asks?
"Um yeah just stuff," Callie said calming down
"I can't be just stuff," Arizona said
"You don't know me I could be just stuff and I'm just over dramatic," Callie said wiping her eyes.
"True," Arizona said
They sat in silence looking at the Seattle sky.
"So do you want to talk about this supposed just stuff," Arizona asked
"Ion know," Callie answers she laid down on the bed with her back turned.
Arizona laid on the bed spooning her, normally she wouldn't do this, but she was buzzed and high.
"You are my sunshine my only sunshine," Arizona sung while playing with Callie's hair
"What're you doing," Callie asked, turning.
"My momma does it for me when I cry and it makes me feel better, is it working for you," Arizona asked.
"A bit," Callie said.
"You make me happy when skies are grey you never know dear how much I love you please don't take my sunshine away," Arizona played with Callie hair will sing to her.
"You feel better," Arizona asked Callie.
"Yeah, a bit," Callie said getting up.
"Well that's good," Arizona said getting up.
"Thanks," Callie said, going in for a hug.
"You're welcome," Arizona said hugging her.
"You wanna rejoin the party," Arizona asked
"Yeah, maybe later I like the little quiet," Callie respond looking out the balcony.
Arizona goes back to playing with her hair. She doesn't know where she learned but she ended up doing two French braids in her hair.
"You think aliens are real," Arizona asked?
"What?" Calliope asked.
"I said do you think aliens are real cuz I remember watching E.T. and I'm pretty sure it was based on a true story," Arizona rambled on.
"Did mark get you high," Callie asked?
"We'll mark did get me high I did," Arizona tried to explain.
"Huh?" Callie asked.
"We'll mark was being a buzz kill and he was like this is big kid weed you can't have any, but I asked nicely, and he let me get some," Arizona explained still playing in Callie's hair.
" I think I'm ready," Callie said getting up
"Wait," Arizona said to late
Callie feels or more so got pulled back on the bed
"Jeez," Callie said laughing with her head in Arizona's lap.
They laughed so hard they started to cry. Callie sat up still laughing. They only stopped laughing when Callie kissed Arizona.
Arizona pulled back.
"You only did that because you're emotionally vulnerable," Arizona said aloud rationalizing what just happened.
"No, I've wanted to do that for a while," Callie said calmly.
"But you have Erica," Arizona said.
"Yea I know," Callie said.
"I can't do that to someone even if that someone is Erica," Arizona said.
"It's ok Erica cheats all the time," Callie said trying to grab Arizona's hands.
"No, it's not," Arizona said pulling her hands away.
"I'll continue to be your friend and be there to comfort you and all that friend stuff, but I will never be a side piece," Arizona said with anger festering.
"Yeah, I get it I'm sorry," Callie said dropping her smirk.
Their was silence in the room. But it was a comfortable silence. Like an I've known you so long you don't even have to talk for me to know how you're feeling quiet.
"But anyway, I was gonna ask did you see that picture on the door when you came in Cuz it wasn't there when I came in," Arizona asked breaking the silence?
There's nothing their Callie thought to herself.
"Alright how about we just stay up here," Callie said thinking it's best for Arizona.
"Do you think the earth is flat," Arizona asked randomly before she poop down on the bed.
Callie stared at the ceiling wondering what's going on in the blonde's head.
"No do you," Callie asked her after joining her on the bed.
"No, I was just wondering," Arizona was interrupted before she could finish her sentence
"I was looking all over for you smalls," Mark said barging in the door.
"She's ok mark she came upstairs looking for the bathroom," Callie sat up to explain.
"OMG I really have to pee," Arizona said remember what she came up the stairs for.
"Bathrooms right there," Calliope said point towards the door by the vanity.
After Arizona went to the restroom Callie began to berate Mark.
"How could you allow her to get high," Callie asked hitting marks arm.
"Ion know she asked," mark said shrugging his shoulder clearly high but not as high as Arizona.
"How do you not know," Callie asked?
"Ion know she asked the smoke with us and then Cristina said to let her so I did," Mark explained.
"So, you let dark and twisty number 2 cloud your judgement," Callie yelled hitting his arm again.
"Ow. I didn't let her cloud my judgement. That weed was just super strong," mark says laughing.
"It's not funny she asked me if the earth is flat," Callie whispered realizing Arizona had left the bathroom.
"Oh, she's fucked up," mark said laughing
"Yeah, she is," Callie whispered as they watched Arizona stair at the wall.
"Ok I'm gonna go back to the party and tell Lexie that you're ok she was worried," mark said.
"Ouuu can you get Cheetos while your down there," Arizona asked.
"What no there's no Cheetos here this isn't a middle school party," mark said.
"Please," Arizona begged and pleaded with her blue eyes.
"There's Cheetos in the pantry in the kitchen you know," Callie said.
"Seriously," mark said.
"Yes go," Callie said shooing mark.
Before mark could open the door, it swung open.
"Baby wait what are you doing," Erica asked surprised to see the other two people in the room.
"Arizona thought this was the bathroom, so she came up here," Callie explained.
"What about mark what's he doing her," Erica asked still suspicious.
"He went looking for Arizona," Callie explained.
"Why do you ask?" Arizona asked the girl.
"Because Callie's known to have history with the boys," Erica said pissy.
"Well yeah I'm bi I'm still attracted to guys," Callie explained standing up.
"Do you wanna have this conversation right now," Erica asked walking closer to Callie.
"You know what I'm just gonna leave come on Arizona," mark said.
"No stay, and yes I really want to have this conversation now. Because I really wanna figure out why you're so jealous of Mark," Callie said clearly annoyed.
"I'm not jealous of mark but I know you and mark have history," Erica said.
"That was fucking 8th grade I wasn't even in high school yet," Callie said.
"It's still history," Erica argues.
"You're acting weird," Callie said.
"No, I'm not it's clear that your still into boys," Erica said.
"I'm literally Bi which means I'm into boys, girls, and non-binary people," Callie explained to her like she was dumb.
"You can't be into to both or whatever you said," Erica screamed.
"Yes, I can what do you think the B in LGBTQ means dumbass," Callie said throwing around words she knew she would regret later.
"That just an excuse to be a whore," Erica yelled.
"You're the whore. And you know I'm tired of you always trying to invalidate my identity," Callie said.
"I'm trying to make you realize that there is no such thing, you don't just switch," Erica said as if she was actually making valid point.
"I'm bi sexual is that so wrong," Callie said.
"You're a lesbian you haven't dated a guy since 8th grade," Erica said enunciating every word.
"No I'm bi," Callie argues starting to pace around the room.
"Yeah ok if your so bi do you parents know," Erica asked knowing Callie's parents have a strained relationship.
"don't bring them into this," Callie said with tears threatening to from her brown eyes.
"What you scared I'm going to tell them about there perfect girls secret,"Erica teased.
Arizona and Mark watched on like kids watching their parents' fight.
"No because I was planning on doing it anyway," Callie said with a smirk on her face.
"No, you weren't ," Erica said trying to call her bluff.
"You know what I'm tired of this I'm tired of you tracking my phone I'm tired of you checking on me I'm tired of you asking where I am and who I'm with anytime I'm not with, so you know what I quit," Callie finished.
"What," Erica asked angry. She was as red as a tomato.
"You heard me I'm fucking tired of you I'm tired of you being a bitch I'm tired of you being rude to my friends I'm just tired of you."
Smack. Everybody stood in the room stunned after Ericas hand meet Callies cheek even Callie was shocked for a moment.
"Get out, get the fuck out," Callie yelled demanding the girl leave her room.
"I'm sorry baby I swear I am," Erica said trying to plead with Callie.
"You heard her get the fuck out bitch," Arizona said in her high state.
"And what are you going to do if I don't," Erica said walking over to her she'd already fucked up with Callie she didn't have much to lose.
"Mark gets Arizona," Callie mouthed across the room.
Mark would eventually but he just wanted to see how far it would go.
"I'll beat your ass," Arizona said not mincing her words
"I'd like to see you try," Erica said in Arizona's face.
"Gladly," Arizona said before punching Erica in the gut.
Mark quickly sprung to action take the taller blonde always Arizona had to chance to pounce again.
"Get off me," Erica tried to fit mark.
"you've embarrassed yourself enough tonight just go home," mark said basically throwing her put the room.
"Are you ok," Arizona asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine," Callie said but she sounded Like she would break at any given moment.
Mark walked into the room after making the girl leave.
"She ruined my high," mark said kind of angry with the realization after he came back into the room.
"You ok Torres," he asked walking over to her holding her after seeing the look on her face.
She just began to sob in his arms.
"Alright I'll make everyone leave," mark said peeling himself from Callie.
Arizona quickly filled in for him.
The whole gang came to her room after everyone left.
They sat on her Alaskan king bed.
"You know Erica is really dumb," Alex said.
"One time she asked me what color an orange is," George said.
"No, she did that's from mean girls," Callie said getting up to take the bottle from George.
"She is the worst," Derek said.
"You barely even meet her, "Callie said.
"Well, she is," Meredith said.
"You really should actually dump her this time," mark said.
"You're too beautiful to let other people hurt you like that," Arizona said patting Callie's hair.
"You think," Callie asked looking into Arizona's eyes.
"Yeah," Arizona said.
"Well how about we sleep then we clean up," mark said.
"No, we can totally do it now," Derek said slurring.
"No, you can't," mark said being the only one that's not totally drunk.
"Alright," Derek said.
In the middle of the night Derek ended up falling off the bed. Addison is a cover hog. Callie sleeping soundly using Arizona as a pillow. Alex snores. Lexie and mark ended up on the floor. This was her family this is Callie's family. In that moment she was happy and content. But the sum eventually rises. And she had to face the facts. She was falling in love the Arizona. The girl who's only known for a mere three months. The girl who she's only had about six conversations with. But she has a girlfriend. One who she loves dearly one who she's known since 9th grade. She had to make a decision and she knew which one to make.
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A/N: it has a weird spacing pattern because I edited this in word on a computer