Post-Scriptum 01 - The Meaning of my Name

A week had passed since the Dock incident, as Team RWBY came to call it. The end-of-semester exams were in full swing and the semester break was on the horizon. Ruby was equal parts exhausted and excited. The non-stop studying and Weiss' draconian tutoring was absolutely awful, but it was for a good cause. Right?

Right?

Oh well, once it's all over, she and Yang could go back to Patch. She missed her dad and her dog, Zwei, so much. She can't wait to bury her face in his fluffy black and white coat.

Yang was basically dead on her bed, her brain short-circuiting from a particular set of emergency first-aid questions. The only matter that was worse for her was history, of which she was teetering on the edge of failure.

Weiss, as mentioned above, was busy tutoring the sisters. Though reluctant at first, she found it quite therapeutic to torture- I mean, 'Educate' her academically deficient teammates.

Blake wasn't studying instead she was on her scroll, glaring emptily at her messages. She groaned as she closed her scroll.

"It's been three days," She complained

Yang grew out of her torpor, hanging her head to the side of her bunk and looking up at her partner.

"He still hasn't answered?" She asked.

Weiss looked at the two curiously.

"What now?"

"Anon," Yang said as if it was all the explanation needed. "I mean to be fair, Blake, he's only been discharged from the hospital like two days ago."

"That didn't stop him from sending us updates for the first two days."

"True..."

The last message anyone in the room got from Anon was of him complaining that he felt like crap because of his meds. Yang thought about why he would stop updating them then shrugged.

"Bah, he's probably face down in his bed, buzzed out of his mind on meds."

"For three days?" Weiss asked, raising her eyebrow in doubt. "By any metrics, that's concerning."

Ruby nodded in agreement.

"She's right." She closed her eyes and frowned pensively. "I know! Let's go visit him and see what's up!"

Yang bolted out of bed and grabbed Ruby like she was luggage.

"Good idea!" She brought Ruby's ear to her mouth. "Thank you for the break, you little genius."

She kissed her little sister on the top of her head. Ruby giggled.

"No problemo!"

Yang grinned.

"Since when do you copy his vocab, Eh Rubes?"

"What? I just think it sounds funny!"

Anon was having quite the shocker. As it turns out, Remnish painkillers don't work well on his earthling body. So not only does the pain not go away, his brain was still feeling the effects of the meds. He dragged himself out of bed, his back still feeling like it was on fire.

"Urgh... Fucking Torchwick!" He cursed. "You fucking amateur, can't kill someone properly."

His knees trembled as his back struggled to support his weight due to the pain. He yelped as he fell to a knee.

"Argh! Someone fucking kill me already!"

He gripped the side of his nightstand, his head spinning and his thoughts jumbling together. He tried to stay up, the nightstand teetering under his weight.

"I'm gonna be sick..."

The nightstand tilted on two of its feet before gravity came into action. The nightstand tipped over, sending Anon to the ground and on his back. He screamed out in pain as his back hit the floor.

"Shit! Shit! Shit!" He whined like an injured dog.

The door swung open, a panicked Team RWBY bursting in.

"Anon!" Ruby cried out. "Is something-"

Everyone saw him face down on the floor and on his knees, gripping his shoulder with one hand.

"Fuck!" He cursed quietly.

The sisters rushed to him, helping him up to sit him down on his bed before sitting beside him.

"What happened?" Yang asked, obviously worried about her hurt friend.

He groaned at the pain.

"The fucking meds aren't working right." He held his mouth, the spinning in his mind devolving into outright vertigo. "I think I'm gonna throw up..."

His olive complexion had turned a sickly pale green. Blake bolted outside and came back with a bucket. Where she got it, Anon didn't care. Just holding it soothed his worries. He eyed his tipped-over nightstand, sighing sadly.

"Shit."

"Want me to help?" Weiss asked, devoid of her usual sass and irritation.

"Kindly do, Eidelweiss." Anon nodded thankfully.

Weiss ignored the nickname and set the stand back in place. She noticed all of his jewelry scattered on the floor. She picked up the golden ring. The gold was tarnished and the small ruby was cracked.

"My old gift," Anon said.

The girls looked to him, his eyes glazed over, his mind clearly in a haze of pain and meds.

"Your old gift?" Blake asked.

"I planned on giving it to... my last girlfriend," Anon explained.

Yang grinned.

"Oh my~. I didn't take you for such a heartbreaker!" She teased.

Anon chuckled bitterly.

"Too bad I caught her tonguing someone else."

Yang froze before stuttering in a panic.

"I-I-I mean uh... I didn't-"

"It's fine, Yang," He said quietly. "I've come to term with my shitty love life."

"So what?" Blake wondered. "You gave up on love?"

"My relationship score is three cheaters and five out of five breakups, that and only one of them ended on good terms." Anon recounted. "I hope that my reasons don't come across as shallow."

The room became real quiet after that. Weiss kept picking up the stuff off the ground like his table lamp and his alarm clock. Her eyes returned to the jewelry still on the floor. A pair of rings that looked nearly identical.

"My signet and Mom's."

"Uh?"

"An old family tradition that dated to a few generations back."

Although she was interested in know more about her friend, Ruby was desperate to diffuse the awkward atmosphere so she jumped at the chance to change the subject.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Mom wasn't home much because of her job but she wanted us to... be connected, for the lack of a better term."

Ruby brought her legs to her chest and looked down sadly.

"What does she do?" She asked half-heartedly.

"Lawyer. Said she tried to be one of few good ones, took cases pro bono, did charity work." He smiled nostalgically. "Even ended up adopting a girl when her shitty parents went to jail."

Anon closed his eyes.

"Just wished she could have stayed longer..."

Ruby gave pause before leaning her head against his arm.

"I miss her..." Anon admitted.

"I understand," Ruby whispered.

Weiss picked up an old necklace. The stone was smooth as glass and looked as though it held the cosmos within its confines. It was... Quite beautiful, mesmerizing even. She waited, expecting him to give some sort of tragic origin but he only blinked.

"What?" He asked.

"Nothing."

She picked up an old bracelet, it looked handmade. Blake noticed the look of guilt and shame that flashed on his face, choosing to not bring it up. He cleared his throat.

"Could you give it back?" He asked meekly. "Please?"

Weiss had to hold back her shock at how... Docile Anon was being. He gingerly took back the bracelet, staring deeply at it while gently rubbing it. Weiss shook her head in confusion.

"It might sound a bit rude but why would you hold on to some things that hold such painful memories?"

Anon stared into her eyes, his soulless stare sending a shiver down her spine.

"It's a reminder, a reminder of my every failure."

He looked at the golden ring.

"My failures at love"

His mother's ring.

"My failure as a son and caretaker."

He looked at his bracelet, clenching his eyes shut.

"My failure at being a good person."

He felt a hand on his cheek. He opened his eyes and was met with Blake, who gave him the most serious look he ever saw her wear.

"That, I will never believe. What you did back at the docks is a testament to that last part not being true."

Ruby held his arm.

"Blake's right! If you weren't a good person, you wouldn't have gotten yourself hurt protecting her."

Anon stared at the two, his soulless gaze feeling colder.

"In what world does making someone kill themselves make you a good person."

The girls looked at him in stunned silence. Anon smiled sadly.

"Remember when I called myself a sinner back when we stayed at Tukson's?" He asked Yang. "I don't say things like that because I think it sounds funny, I mean it."

He looked outside his window, his mind dulling.

"There are... many sins I bear on my soul."

"Sins?" Blake wondered out loud. "I didn't take you for the religious type."

Yang gave Blake a crooked look.

"Wait, are you going to ignore the bombshell he just dropped?"

Blake glared at Yang. Anon shook his head, disregarding that exchange.

"I was, once." He closed his eyes. "But in His eyes, we were mistakes. He turned his back on us, washed his hands of us..."

He looked outside the window emptily.

"My whole life, I've blamed the world for giving me a life I didn't ask for. My whole life I've blamed the world for everything bad that ever happened to me. I've blamed the world for giving me such shit luck."

He sighed, his eyes turning bitter.

"But after I... took her life, I realized how..."

His hand shook, his mouth gaped as he tried to find the proper words.

"How much everything truly mattered." He lowered his hands. "And by extension, the inescapable truth that I had to accept."

He hung his head.

"I'm responsible. I'm responsible for my life, for my happiness, for my actions."

Tears trickled down his eyes.

"Dad probably left because of me."

Yang flinched, her eyes widening. She frowned sadly with her teeth clenched.

Anon rubbed his bracelet, a tear falling on it. He swallowed his words, the pain of remembering being too much.

"I lost my mom because I couldn't take care of her well enough," He said hoarsely.

Ruby hugged his arm tightly.

"I wasn't good enough at love, so I kept either being cheated on or getting dumped. Maybe I'm just unlovable..."

He clasped his hand on his side, his eyes flooding with tears of sadness and rage.

"My own blood, My twin, using and abusing me for his own end, only to then leave me for dead."

His tired eyes drifted down to his tear-soaked lap.

"My whole life is just one continuous streak of bad luck and awful mistakes."

His heart sunk...

"I've tried to live as best I could... And I fucked it all up."

...Before breaking.

"No..." Ruby said quietly, hugging him tighter.

"I've wasted my life."

He felt a pair of arms wrap around his left arm, as Yang joined her sister.

"You didn't..." Yang comforted, stroking his hair.

"I shouldn't be here."

He heard steps, then felt a light weight on his shoulder. Blake was leaning her head on his right shoulder.

"No, you belong here." She insisted quietly.

Anon paused.

"I don't deserve..." He muttered.

he felt a soft hand on his cheek, the hand gently lifted his head for his eye to meet Weiss's.

"Whatever you're about to say, it's nonsense."

She looked angry, but her voice was hoarse. She was obviously holding back a tide of emotions. her thumb traced the healing wound on his brow.

"I will not tolerate someone as stupidly brave as you to put yourself down for any reason!"

Anon felt more tears falling.

"I've wanted to die for so long..." He let out a silent breath, leaning out of Weiss's hand. "I still don't know why I've kept going but..."

He felt their grips tighten, especially Ruby's.

"I wish I was dead. I wish it would have been me that day... I would've deserved it."

He felt some damp spots on his arms and his head craned to the side. Ruby quietly sobbed as she held on to him as if his life depended on it. He moved his hand, catching a tear with his finger.

"Don't..." Ruby struggled to talk through her tears. "Don't say that. It's not true."

She let go of his arm, holding on to his chest instead.

"You don't deserve to die."

There was a sober silence in the room now. Anon didn't know what to say.

Why... Why do you care so much about me? You guys barely know me.

His heart felt like it was being strangled by rough hemp rope.

"Why?"

He could only say that word as anything else he tried to say died in his throat.

"Because you're our friend, dummy," Yang said quietly, still holding on to him closely.

"You're the first friend I made here," Ruby said. "I... I want to keep playing games with you, I want to keep going on adventures with you in the future."

Anon often held his emotions back. Like a dam holding back water and only releasing the excess needed to function.

"I want you to stay too," Yang said. "I still want you to come clubbing with me."

Cracks began to form in the dam.

"I'd hate to lose you," Weiss said, now with tears staining her beautiful face. "I can't lose the only person who I can match wits with..."

Yang scooched into the bed, giving Weiss the space to join the group hug.

"Please, don't... Say things like that," Weiss said. "I don't want to think of a world where you aren't in it."

The crack deepened and water began to spill out.

"You said we were partners in crime, right?" Blake asked. "I watch your back, you watch mine. That was our promise."

She grabbed his arm and wrapped it around her neck.

"A world where you aren't in it... Is one I don't want to be in."

The hollowness in his eyes began to crack as his whole body trembled, his breathing became shaky and tears wouldn't stop flowing. He felt Ruby's grip tighten.

"I don't want to lose my dear friend." Ruby was now balling her eyes out. "I don't want to look at your seat and see it being empty."

The dam, built over years and years, now lay shattered. The hollow shell was gone, in its place was a grieving young man. The life he had thought he wasted, the people he felt he let down. The four girls that surrounded him still stayed with him and they put up with his ranting, with his sob story. They didn't pity nor scorn him. They sat and listened. They held him and told him that they cared.

That they honestly loved him as their precious and irreplaceable friend.

Anon hugged Ruby back and wept along with RWBY's young leader.

"I'm sorry." He sobbed. "I'm so sorry..."

He felt Ruby cuddle up closer.

"It's ok." She exhaled. "You're ok."

Am I?

The burning on his back felt like it was fading, replaced by a pleasant warmth. He looked at Team RWBY, his heart beating softly with an emotion he hadn't truly felt in a long time.

Yesterday's harrowing event had taken its toll on everyone involved, but exams don't care about your mental state.

Worse still, the first extended bloc was history.

Ruby shot a glance at Anon's usual seat next to Velvet. She kept staring at the empty seat until the bell rang and everyone was seated.

The morning kept rolling on and the second exam bloc came.

Ruby kept looking at Anon's usual seat. Since It was still empty, she sighed sadly. Yang paused her struggling to give her sister a supportive tap on the back.

Morning gave way to noon and the scenery changed from the study halls to the cafeteria, where Anon was still nowhere to be seen. Ruby frowned nervously and rubbed her arm. She pushed her plate of food away and sped away using her semblance. She passed by the janitor, who cussed her out for making a mess. She didn't care right now, she needed to see if her friend was ok. She arrived at his door and knocked thrice.

Nothing.

Ruby felt a chill going down her spine, a cold breeze scratching at her nape. She wanted to barge in, to bash the door down to see if her friend was truly fine. However, before she could, the door opened and there stood her friend.

To say he looked like shit would be an insult to any kind of fecal matter.

He was pale and decrepit, but there was a glimmer in his eyes that she seldom witnessed.

"Hey." He greeted lazily.

"Hey." She greeted back. "You... You haven't been in class all morning."

Anon blinked.

"I'm still on medical leave, dum-dum."

Ruby made a noise. Anon smiled weakly and gave his diminutive friend a pat on the head. Usually, she would complain about being treated like a child but chose to let it slide.

"Are you... Alright?" She asked worriedly.

Anon stopped rubbing her scalp.

"No," He admitted. "I haven't been alright for a long time."

I haven't felt human for a long time either.

He looked down to match her stare.

"But..." He smiled. "I think I'll be better soon enough."

Ruby smiled with him and locked her friend in an embrace.

"I'll make sure of it, deal?"

He snorted in amusement before returning the hug.

"I'll be in your care."

She let go and gave him a dazzling grin.

"I'll do my best."

His smile widened and Ruby gave him a look before turning around.

"Thought so," she said.

"Say what now?"

She walked off with him in tow.

"You look great when you smile!" She chirped. "Now come on, I'm hungry!"

She heard an otherworldly sound coming from her emaciated companion. She turned around, looking disturbed, and stared quietly at Anon.

"Well..." He said, looking down at his belly. "I guess I am too."

The red-hooded girl kept up her stare, trying to keep a straight face.

"Jesus!" She blurted. "What was that?"

He shrugged.

"Meh, it'll only be a problem if I ignore it." He overtook his red-coloured friend. "C'mon, I'm quite literally starving."

Ruby looked at his back as he walked. His usual slouch was no more, now he walked with back straight and looking ahead. She smiled before joining him with a gleeful skip.

"Wait for me!"

Anon walked purposefully for the first time in years, Ruby skipping alongside him and talking about games she wanted to play with him. He felt a small smile creeping on his lips. For six years he tried to wipe away any real smile but his time, he let it grow.

For a long time now... I always thought that I didn't deserve to be happy after all my fuck ups. I just hope that I'll be able to live up to the meaning of my name. If not for me...

He looked at Ruby who flashed him a smile, one he returned.

For them.

POST-SCRIPTUM: END

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