Chapter Eight
Jennie
Why am I so pissed? We didn't do anything.
Did we?
I can't even tell what the hell happened last night before we fell asleep. Technically, it wasn't anything, but then again, it was, which is probably why I'm so pissed, because I'm so freaking confused.
First she doesn't tell me about Kai for two solid weeks. Then she fails to mention that she's deaf, although I really have no right to be upset about that. That's not something I should feel obligated to have been told.
But Irene?
Girlfriend?
How could she fail to mention in the three weeks I've been talking to her that she has a girlfriend?
She's just like Kai. She has a dick and two balls and no heart, and that makes her Kai's twin. I should probably just start calling her Kai. I should just call them all Kai. From here on out, all of them shall be referred to as Kai.
My father should be thanking the high heavens that I'm not in law school, because I am by far the absolute worst judge of character who has ever walked the planet.
Lisa: False alarm. It was just Bobby. Sorry about that.
Me: SCREW. YOU.
Lisa: ???
Me: Don't even.
A few seconds pass with me staring at my silent phone, and then a knock comes from the bathroom. Lisa swings the door open and enters my room, holding her hands with her palms up in the air as if she has no idea why I'm upset. I laugh, but it isn't a happy laugh at all.
Me: This conversation will require a laptop. I have a lot to say.
I open my computer as she makes her way back to her room. I give her a minute to log on, then I open our chat.
Lisa: Can you please explain why you're so pissed?
Me: Hmm. Let me count the ways. (1) You have a girlfriend. (2) You have a girlfriend. (3) Why, if you have a girlfriend, was I even in your BEDROOM? (4) You have a girlfriend!
Lisa: I have a girlfriend. Yes. And you were in my room because we agreed to work on lyrics together. I don't recall anything happening between us last night to warrant this reaction from you. Or am I mistaken?
Me: Lisa, it's been three weeks! I've known you for three weeks now, and you've never ONCE mentioned that you have a girlfriend. And speaking of Irene, does she even know I moved in?
Lisa: Yes. I tell her everything. Look, it wasn't an intentional omission, I swear. You and I have just never had a conversation where she came up.
Me: Okay, I'll let it go that you failed to mention her, but I'm not about to let everything else slide.
Lisa: And this is where I'm confused, because I'm not clear on what you think we did.
Me: You're such a jerk.
Lisa: Ouch? I guess.
Me: Can you honestly say that your reaction to the possibility of her being at your door earlier was a normal, innocent reaction? You were freaking out that she would see me with you, which means you were doing something you wouldn't want her to see. I know all we did was fall asleep, but what about the WAY we fell asleep? Do you think she would have been okay with the fact that you had your arms around me all night and your face was practically glued to my chest? And not only that, but what about the fact that I sat between your legs the other night? Would she have smiled and kissed you hello if she had walked in right then? I doubt it. I'm fairly certain that would have ended with me being punched.
Ugh! Why is this upsetting me so much? I bang my head lightly against the headboard out of frustration.
Moments later, Lisa appears in the doorway between our bathroom and my bedroom. She's chewing on the corner of her bottom lip. Her features are a lot calmer than when she was in here just a few minutes ago. She walks slowly into my room, then sits on the edge of my bed with her laptop on her knees.
Lisa: I'm sorry.
Me: Yeah. Good. Whatever. Go away.
Lisa: Really, Jennie. I haven't been looking at it like that at all. The last thing I want is for things to be weird between us. I like you. I have fun with you. But if for one second I led you to believe that something was going to happen between us, I am so, so sorry.
I sigh and attempt to blink the tears away.
Me: I'm not upset because I thought something was going to happen between us, Lisa. I don't WANT anything to happen between us. I haven't even been single for a whole week yet. I'm upset because I feel like there was a moment, or maybe two, when—as much as neither of us wants to cross that line—we almost did. And you can deal with your actions on your own, but the fact that I was unaware that you had a girlfriend was really unfair to me. I feel like—
I lean my head back against the headboard and squeeze my eyes shut, long enough to force back the tears once more.
Lisa: You feel like what?
Me: I feel like you almost made me a Krystal. I absolutely would have kissed you last night, and the fact that I didn't know you were involved with someone would have made me a Krystal. I don't want to be a Krystal, Lisa. I can't tell you how much their betrayal hurts me, and I will never, ever do that to another girl. So that's why I'm upset. I don't even know Irene, yet you made me feel like I've already betrayed her. And as innocent as you may be, I'm blaming you for that one.
Lisa finishes reading my message, then calmly lies back on the bed. She brings her palms to her forehead and inhales a deep breath. We both remain still as we think about the situation. After several quiet minutes, she sits back up.
Lisa: I don't even know what to say right now other than I'm sorry. You're right. Even though I thought you knew about Irene, I can absolutely see what you're saying. But I also need you to know that I would never do something like that to her. Granted, what happened between us last night is not something I would ever want Irene to see, but that's mostly because Irene doesn't understand the process of writing music. It's a very intimate thing, and because I can't hear, I do have to use my hands or my ears to understand things that come naturally to others. That's all it was. I wasn't trying to cause anything to happen between us. I was just curious. I was intrigued. And I was wrong.
Me: I understand. I never thought for a second that your intentions weren't genuine when you asked me to sing for you. Everything just happened so fast earlier, and I was still trying to recover from the fact that I woke up in your bed and the lights were flickering. Then you go and flash the word "girlfriend" in my face. It's a lot to process. And I believe you when you say you thought I knew about her.
Lisa: Thank you.
Me: Just promise me one thing. Promise me you will never be a Kai, and I will never, ever be a Krystal.
Lisa: I promise. And that's impossible, because we're so much more talented than they are.
She glances up and smiles her smiley smile at me, which makes me automatically smile in return.
Me: Now, get out of here. I'm going back to sleep, because someone spent the whole night drooling on my boobs and snoring way too loud.
Lisa laughs, but before she leaves, she messages me one last time.
Lisa: I'm excited for you to meet her. I really think you'll like her.
She closes her laptop, stands, and walks back to her room.
I close my laptop and pull the covers over my head.
I hate that my heart is wishing so bad that she didn't have a girlfriend.
• • •
"No, she already moved in," Sorn says. Her cell phone is propped up on her shoulder, and from the sound of it, she just broke the news to her sister that I've taken the empty bedroom. Sorn completely ignores that I'm even in the same room with her and continues talking about me.
I know the fact that I haven't clarified that I'm not deaf is a little mean, but who is she to assume I can't read lips?
"I don't know; she's a friend of Lisa's. I should have ignored her when she asked if I would go—in the rain, mind you—and bring her up to the apartment. Apparently, her boyfriend dumped her, and she had nowhere else to go."
She pulls a seat out at the bar and sits with her back facing me. She laughs at something the person on the other end of the line says. "Tell me about it. Lisa seems to enjoy taking in strays, doesn't she?"
I grip the remote in my hand and hold it tightly in an attempt to keep from hurling it at the back of her head.
"I told you not to ask about Bobby," she says with a sigh. "You know he irritates the hell out of me, but I just . . . dammit, I just can't stay away."
Wait. Did I just hear that correctly? Might Sorn have . . . feelings?
She's lucky I like Bobby, or the remote would be greeting her pretty little head right now. She's also lucky someone is knocking at the door loudly enough to distract me from hurting her.
Sorn stands up and turns to face me, pointing at the front door. "SOMEONE'S . . . AT . . . THE . . . DOOR!" Rather than answer it, she walks to her bedroom and closes her door.
So hospitable, that one.
I stand and make my way to the front door, knowing it's more than likely Irene. I place my hand on the doorknob and inhale a steady breath.
Here we go.
I open the door, and standing in front of me is one of the most beautiful women I've ever laid eyes on. Her hair is straight and jet-black, and it falls around two naturally fair shoulders. Her face is smiling. Her whole, entire face is beaming. She's nothing but a face full of beautiful white teeth, and they're smiling at me, and it's making me smile back, even though I really don't want to.
I was really hoping she was ugly. I don't know why.
"Jennie?" she says. It's just one word, but I can tell by her voice that she's deaf, like Lisa. But, unlike Lisa, she speaks. And she enunciates really well.
"You must be the girlfriend!" I say with feigned excitement. Is it feigned? Maybe not. Her entire demeanor is making me feel sunny and happy, and maybe I am a tiny bit excited to meet her?
Weird.
She steps forward and gives me a hug. I close the door behind us, and she slips off her shoes and heads to the refrigerator.
"Lisa has told me a lot about you," she says as she pops open a soda, then walks to the cabinet for a glass. "I think it's great that you're helping her through her writer's block. Poor girl has been stressing for months now." She fills her cup with ice and soda. "So how are you fitting in? I see you've survived Sorn. And Bobby has to be a pain in the ass." She looks at me expectantly, but I'm still loving the fact that she's so . . . Pleasant? Likable? Cheerful?
I smile back at her and lean against the counter. I'm trying to figure out exactly how to respond to her. She's speaking to me as if she can hear me, so I reply the same way.
"I like it," I say. "I've never lived with this many people before, so it's taking some getting used to."
She smiles and tucks a lock of her hair behind her ear.
Ugh. Even her ears are pretty.
"Good," she says. "Lisa told me about your shitty birthday last weekend and how she took you out for cake, but it didn't make up for you never having the chance to celebrate."
I have to be honest. It bothers me that she told her she took me out for cake. It bothers me, because maybe she's right and she does tell her everything. And it also bothers me because Lisa seems to tell me nothing. Not that I've earned that right from her.
God, I hate feelings. Or I hate my conscience. The two are constantly at war, and I'm not sure which one I'd rather turn off.
"So," she says, "we're going out tonight to celebrate."
I pause. "We?"
She nods. "Yeah. Me, you, Lisa, Bobby, if he's not busy. We can invite Sorn, but that's laughable." She walks past me toward Lisa's bedroom, then turns to face me again. "Can you be ready in an hour?"
"Um." I shrug. "Okay."
She opens Lisa's bedroom door and slips inside. I stand frozen, listening. Why am I listening?
I hear Irene giggling behind the closed door, and it makes me wince.
Oh, yay. This should be fun.
Lisa
"Are you sure you don't want to stay in tonight?"
Irene shakes her head. "That poor girl needs to have some fun, with the week she's had. And I've been so overwhelmed with my internship and the T word. I need a night out." She leans forward and kisses me on the chin. "Do you want to get a cab so you can drink, or do you want to drive?"
She knows I won't drink around her. I don't know why she always tries her reverse psychology on me. "Nice try," I sign. "I'll drive."
She laughs. "I have to change and get ready. We're leaving in an hour." She tries to slide off me, but I grip her waist and roll her onto her back. I know for a fact that it never takes her more than half an hour to get ready. That leaves a good thirty minutes.
"Allow me to help you out of your clothes, then." I pull her shirt off over her head, and my eyes drop to the very thin, intricately laced bra she has on. I grin. "Is this new?"
She nods and smiles her sexy smile. "I bought it for you. Front clasp, just how you like it."
I pinch the clasp and undo it. "Thank you. I can't wait to try it on."
She laughs and slaps my arm. I take off her bra, then lower myself on top of her and drop my mouth to hers.
I spend the next half hour reminding myself how much I've missed her. I remind myself how much I love her. I remind myself how good it feels when we're together. I keep reminding myself over and over, because for the past week, it felt as if I was starting to forget.
• • •
Me: Be ready in thirty minutes. We're going out.
Bobby: I don't want to go, have an early shift tomorrow.
No. He has to go. I can't go out with Irene and Jennie by myself.
Me: No, you're going. Be ready in thirty minutes.
Bobby: No, I'm not. Have fun.
Me: You're going. 30.
Bobby: Not going.
Me: Going.
Bobby: Not.
Me: Yes.
Bobby: No.
Me: Please? You owe me.
Bobby: What the hell do I owe you for?
Me: Let's see, about a year's worth of rent, for one.
Bobby: Low blow, man. Fine.
Thank God. I don't know what Jennie gets like when she drinks, but if she's a lightweight like Irene is, I don't think I can handle the two of them on my own.
I walk to the kitchen, and Irene is at the sink, pulling out the bottle of Pine-Sol. She holds it up to ask if I want any, and I shake my head.
"Figured I'd save money if I downed a couple of shots here first. You think Jennie wants any?"
I shrug but pull out my phone to ask her.
Me: You want a shot before we go?
Jennie: No, thank you. Not sure I feel like drinking tonight, but you go right ahead.
"She doesn't want any," I sign to Irene. Bobby walks out of his bedroom and sees Irene pouring a shot from the Pine-Sol container.
Shit. There goes the hiding spot.
He doesn't even blink when he sees her filling her shot glass. "Make it two," he says to her. "If Lisa is forcing me to go out tonight, I'm getting so wasted she'll regret it."
I cock my head. "How long have you known that wasn't cleaning solution?"
He shrugs. "You're deaf, Lisa. You would be surprised how many times I'm behind you and you don't even know it." He picks up the shot Irene poured, and they both turn their attention to something behind me. Their shocked expressions force me to turn around and see what they're looking at.
Oh, wow.
I shouldn't have turned around.
Jennie is walking out of her bedroom, but I'm not sure if it's really Jennie. This girl isn't wearing baggy shirts or walking around with her hair pulled up and a naked face. This girl is wearing a strapless black dress that's anything but simple. Her hair is down and thick, and I'm thinking it probably smells as incredible as it looks. She smiles past me and says "Thanks" to either Irene or Bobby, one of whom more than likely just told her how great she looks. She's smiling at them, but then she holds her hands up and yells, "No!" just as a mist of liquid rains down on me from behind.
I spin around, and Bobby and Irene are both coughing and spitting into the sink. Bobby is sipping straight from the faucet, making a face that says he didn't enjoy whatever just went down his throat.
"What the hell?" Irene says, scrunching up her face and wiping her mouth.
Jennie runs into the kitchen with her hand over her mouth. She's shaking her head, trying not to laugh, but she looks apologetic at the same time. "I'm sorry," she keeps saying over and over.
What the hell just happened?
Bobby composes himself, then turns to Jennie. He speaks and signs at the same time, which I appreciate. He can't know how isolating it feels when you're in a group of people who hear, but no matter what, he always signs when I'm in the room with him. "Did we actually just almost drink an entire shot of Pine-Sol?"
He's eyeing Jennie hard. She answers him, and he signs her response for my benefit. She says, "You two weren't supposed to drink it. It was supposed to be Lisa. And no, I didn't actually put Pine-Sol in there, idiot. I'm not trying to kill the her. It was apple juice and vinegar."
She tried to prank me.
And she failed.
I start laughing and text her.
Me: Nice try. That was a valiant effort, although it backfired.
She flips me off.
I look at Irene; luckily, she's laughing about it. "There is no way I could live here," she says. She walks to the refrigerator and pulls out the milk, then makes herself and Bobby a quick drink to wash away the aftertaste.
"Let's go," Bobby says after he downs the milk and tosses his cup into the sink. "Lisa is driving cuz I won't be able to walk in three hours."