Oyu No Ranma

by Zorknot

Ranma gets himself stuck as a girl early on. Now she's got completely new problems. In ch. 21 Ranma teaches Akane a lesson and then takes a nap, Nabiki tries to escape Azusa's frilly prison, and the ladle lady finally accomplishes what she was practicing for all this time.

6. Earth, Wind, and Liar

Oyu no Ranma

A Ranma ½ fanfiction, by Zorknot

Chapter 6: Earth, Wind, and Liar

Disclaimer: You see beyond the mirror into the world of Notion. It exists so that your dreams and meandering thoughts may frolic behind the walls. These ideas are plentiful and vast and just beyond your sight, save for brief glimpses of inspiration. Do not despair of this, take comfort. For, if you break the mirror, the shards can cut into your soul. I know this, for I write fanfiction. I know all too well that the characters and situations of Ranma ½ do not belong to me, but to a Japanese lady named Rumiko Takahashi and a collection of production companies and publishers. If you enjoy this story, please look deep into the world of Notion and see the glimmer of hope that lies within. Buy a volume of the manga or anime even though you can probably find it all for free online. Your soul will thank you. (of course, this assumes it is possible for you to exist apart from your soul, which introduces all sorts of existential questions I'll not delve into here.)

~~~~~Ch.6: Earth,Wind, and Liar~~~~~

If Saotome Ranma, teenage martial artist, was in any way anxious, she had good reason to be. Not only was she a teenager and a martial artist, she was also a she, which even people who are born female have problems with. Only two days after taking the vial that made her girlhood permanent for the next six months, Ranma was struggling to maintain her calm. She was also growing increasingly aware of how short she was. She was walking on the fence instead of beside Akane on the way back to the house in a large part because Akane had no right being an inch taller than her.

Also, walking next to Akane made Ranma continually question her sexuality, which was tiring at best. She liked Akane. Did she LIKE Akane? Did Nabiki's kiss really mean anything? Wasn't it more that she wasn't asked first? She thought Akane was attractive, but was she attracted to Akane? And what should she do if she was? And what if she wasn't, what did that mean? And what the fuck did it matter anyway? She sent Akane's sister to the hospital. She hit a defenseless girl. She did the exact opposite of protecting the weak. She didn't deserve to have Akane as a friend OR a girlfriend. She should move out on her own and sell octopus masks on the street or whatever it was honorless people did now that seppuku was out of fashion.

The thought of seppuku sent a shiver down her spine. She could never do something like that. And the thought made her feel worse, because it meant she was a coward besides everything else. And it wasn't like recent history provided her with any kind of defense, because adding to Ranma's anxiety was the nagging possibility that maybe she and her father hadn't lost their crazed Amazonian pursuer when they left China. Maybe the homicidal maniac would find her and attack. Maybe Akane would get hurt.

"What is it, Ranma?" Akane looked up at her from the street.

Ranma realized that she had come to a stop on the fence. Still, she didn't say anything for a long moment. If she had just faced Shampoo and stopped her once and for all, If she had hit Shampoo like she had hit Nabiki, maybe she wouldn't have to worry about the bitch hurting her best friend.

Ranma felt some moisture well up in her eyes. She blinked and made like it was dust, rubbing her eyes with her fingers. She didn't want to cry, she wanted to be angry, but she didn't have anyone to be angry at,and her stupid female body had different defaults set in place. She took a breath, and when she was sure her breathing was steady she said "Hey, Akane, how high can you jump?"

"I don't know, I never measured it, why?"

"You think you can jump up onto the fence?"

Akane shook her head. "I don't think so. I mean I can go at least half that high. I can do a somersault in the air and land on my feet, but I don't think I could make it up there."

Ranma squatted on the fence her elbows on her knees and her head on her interlaced fingers. She was wearing the same Chinese outfit from that morning, so there wasn't any danger of flashing anyone. "Try."

"Right now?" Akane was still in her yellow gi, her only change from that morning being the sandals she wore to protect her feet from the asphalt.

"Yeah."

Akane nodded slowly. She took a breath, bent her knees and jumped.

Ranma had to fight not to laugh. It was really more of a hop. It was more than most people could do. As Akane had said, it was more than half the height of the the three meter tall fence, but it still looked embarrassingly pitiful compared to what Ranma was used to.

"Okay. Let's try something. There was this one guy I studied from. He said we all have elemental affinities. His element was Water, because he was all about deflection and wearing an opponent down over time. He told me my element was air. You know Pops and me, we like to jump up and exchange blows at each other before we reach the ground. You on the other hand, you have awesome defenses and really crushing attacks as long as you're centered. You're all about stances, and sure movements. But when you jump, you're kind of leaving the Earth? So maybe you can't be as sure of what you're doing and you can't do as well."

Akane nodded, but she looked confused. "Fine, but how does this help me?"

"Okay, try to think of it like this. You're tied to the Earth by gravity right? It's like a bunch of rubber bands pulling you down, and your legs are like a spring holding you up. Now imagine all these pull you more and more, until, all of a sudden, they snap, and that's when the 'spring' releases, and you jump."

"Yes, sensei, I think I get it." Akane concentrated, and her legs bent. Deeper now, and it was if she were carrying something heavy. And then she was off the ground. As if in slow motion she came closer and closer to Ranma.

Then she collided with Ranma.

They both fell into the canal behind the fence. Or they almost did. Instead of hitting the water they floated some ten centimeters above it. A basin in the water formed around them. "What the…?" Ranma started before she remembered what had happened the previous morning. "Oh. Weird."

"I did it! I jumped high enough!" Akane's knee was nestled snugly in Ranma's rib.

"Yeah ya got the height down. Gotta work on aim though. Any ideas on how to get off this ride?" Ranma was trying to get up, but was finding some difficulty. Every time she tried to stand it was like he had life preservers on her feet and she fell back down.

Akane looked around her at their predicament. She pushed herself off of Ranma and for a moment, Ranma was relieved at the removal of her knee. In the next moment, though, Akane slipped into the water like a stone.

Ranma blinked, unsure of what she had just seen. She felt the water close in on her, not quite touching her skin, but close enough that it almost didn't matter. She could feel the cold from it, and if she wasn't paying attention, she would have thought it had simply hit her.

Bubbles spurted up from the place Akane had disappeared, where Ranma was now treading water. Surely Akane knew how to swim?

Oh shit, Ranma realized. She didn't.

Ranma took a breath. She dove into the water and opened her eyes. It was a bit dark, but she could see clearly as there was a thin layer of air between her eyes and the water. She was briefly distracted by the silvery sheen of her hands in the water. There was a thin layer of air around them too. Not enough to keep her from swimming down, thankfully, but enough to make the light reflect off of the surface.

Searching below her, she found Akane standing at the bottom of the canal, running as fast as she could. It wasn't very fast, though, with the water blocking her, and she couldn't see which way she was going, which was not toward the shore, but along the canal. She would have drowned if Ranma hadn't grabbed her shoulders.

As soon as Ranma touched Akane, the air around Ranma grew and encompassed Akane as well, causing the both of them to shoot up to the surface and out of the water completely. They fell onto the side of the canal in a tumble, the back of Akane's head landing neatly onto Ranma's crotch, making Ranma thankful for once that she didn't have boy parts. It was still something of an awkward position though, so Ranma quickly stood up.

Akane sat, breathing heavily. "Thanks, Ranma. I probably should have told you that I can't swim."

"You can swim," Ranma said.

"No, Ranma, I can't! I've tried, believe me, I've tried, but-"

"But the harder you try the more you don't seem to be able to do it?" Ranma continued for her friend with a smile.

"Yes! Exactly! How did you know?"

"Well, if you get your strength from the earth, then it make sense that the harder you try at something, the more you'd get pulled to the earth. And if you're in water, that would make you sink, right? So it's really the same reason you weren't jumping as high before."

"What? But there's a big difference between having an earth style, and being magically tied to the earth!"

Ranma shrugged. "Maybe it's all in your mind. Maybe it's like you don't have anything to grab onto, and so you can't center yourself. Just like when you're in the air. So you use your ki to bring you to a place you feel more secure."

Akane stood and faced Ranma, her eyes wide and her jaw slack.

Not knowing what else to do, Ranma jumped back onto the fence. "C'mon let's get you back home. Don't wanna catch cold do you?"

Akane held her hand up. "No, wait Ranma, you just… you don't know how long I've been trying to swim. How many classes I've taken. How many hours I've spent. I've had at least ten different teachers, including my dad. None of them had a clue what I was doing wrong."

"Well, don't get all excited just yet. I might not be right about it, and even if I am, you might not be able to fix it."

"Ranma, shut up. You're the best teacher I ever had. And the best friend. I've only known you two days, but I can already say that."

It was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to Ranma. She didn't know what to say. All she could think of was, "Thanks, Akane." She tried to put all the feeling she could into those words.

Akane looked down. "I really hope you're not going to leave or anything. I know you feel bad about Nabiki, and Kasumi hasn't been as welcoming as she normally is, but you and your father have really helped us I think. It just has to get worse before it gets better."

Ranma sighed. "I'm not leaving. I thought about it, but it wouldn't solve anything. 'Sides Nabiki's okay, right? Just a bad black eye really." Ranma tried not to remember how Nabiki had looked as she was stitching her wound. How the skull gave way sickeningly when she pressed on it. But that couldn't have been real, because Nabiki was fine in the hospital. No skull fractures. No brain damage. Ranma shook her head. From practical point of view, Nabiki deserved everything she got. Going to the hospital every now and again was just part of being a martial artist. But the way Nabiki had looked…

It scared Ranma. Worse than cats. The idea that she didn't have perfect control. That she could hurt someone like that without meaning to. But leaving wouldn't help. If she left, Shampoo might follow her trail to the Tendos. And maybe they would refuse to give any information. And maybe Shampoo would say "Obstacles is for killing!" Like she did that restaurant owner in Hong Kong. And what if Ranma and her father hadn't come out of their hiding places then? What if they hadn't been in the restaurant at all? Would Shampoo have killed that man? Had she killed people without Ranma even knowing about it? She and Genma had been so busy running they never bothered to check.

"Akane, I told you about Shampoo, right? Purple hair, carries bon bori?"

"Yes."

"If you see her, don't fight her. Don't talk to her, don't even let her see you if you can help it. Just get me. She's better than you, and she's psychotic."

"I can handle myself," Akane waved Ranma off.

"I know you can, I'm just sayin' the odds ain't gonna be in your favor if you go against Shampoo the way you are now. You're good, but ya ain't in her league yet."

Akane nodded, "I get it, I guess. Maybe you should call the police about her, though, if she really is as bad as you say."

Ranma thought about it for a moment, but shook her head. "I don't see that ending well. Besides, she can knock down walls as easy as sneezing, so I don't think they could really keep her in a prison."

Akane tried her new jumping technique and managed to jump over the fence, without knocking Ranma over. She and Ranma then walked the rest of the way home. Once they were inside the main gate, Akane looked at her watch. "Three forty-five. I kind of feel bad for missing class."

"Akane, your sister was in the hospital. You can be absent for that."

"Yeah, but we could have showed up for the last period at least. Maybe we could have gotten Nabiki's assignments for her, and ours too while we were at it."

"One day's worth of assignments ain't gonna kill ya, Akane."

Akane giggled.

"What?"

Akane waved Ranma off. "It's just that you still talk like a boy whenever you get irritated or nervous. It's kind of cute."

"Yeah, well you got a cute smile, dontcha? So I guess we're even." Ranma felt herself blushing. She never really traded compliments with anyone before. She was so used to insults. "Let's uh, go inside or somethin'."

Ranma reached the doorway, and was about to enter, when a shadowy, lumpy mass fell from above. Startled, Ranma's hair stood on end as she jumped away, her hands making involuntary warding gestures.

"What's wrong?" Akane asked.

Ranma took a few breaths. "I, uh…I just ain't used ta folks sneakin' up on me." The lumpy mass appeared to be a small man, about half Ranma's size, and dressed like a ninja. He looked to be in his thirties, despite his size. He hadn't landed well and scrambled to a crouch in front of Akane and Ranma.

"Honestly, Sasuke, I've never known anyone to take 'eavesdropping' so literally."

The little man smiled widely and raised a hand in greeting. "Good afternoon, mistress Tendo! Master Kuno sends his love."

Akane crossed her arms angrily. "Tell him I don't want it."

Sasuke giggled. "That's a funny joke, mistress Tendo! I don't think that Master Kuno will appreciate it, though, I'm afraid. He also has asked me to give this message to mistress Saotome." He retrieved a rolled up piece of paper from his gi and held it out.

Akane nudged Ranma. "That's you."

"Oh. Uh… right." Ranma shook her head and moved forward, taking the paper from Sasuke after some hesitation.

"Thank you for allowing me to complete my mission. I will now be off!" With that, Sasuke disappeared.

Ranma blinked "So fast… Who or…what was that, Akane?"

Akane shrugged. "Sarugakure Sasuke. He's Kuno's ninja retainer. Kuno uses him to stalk me when I'm not at school. He's…mostly harmless."

"Kuno has a ninja retainer? How rich IS he?"

Akane scowled. "Just because he's rich doesn't mean he can have whatever he wants."

"Well, sure, it doesn't change the fact that he's a creep, but what is someone that rich doing in Nerima?"

"Ranma, you do realize that we own a dojo, right? We have a koi pond?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Ranma, those things aren't cheap. We live in an affluent area of Tokyo. You don't know how many times we've almost had to leave because we couldn't make our payments."

"Why don't you just move somewhere else, then?"

Akane thinned her lips. Then she took Ranma's hand and led her to the dojo. She pointed to the altar on the wall. "That altar is for my mother. She and Dad built this place before I was born. She loved this place and she loved us in it. Sometimes I can still feel her when I wake up in the morning. When I go to sleep I can almost imagine her tucking me in like she did when I was five. Some part of her spirit still lives in the walls of this house. How could we leave? How could we abandon her?"

Ranma swallowed. "I didn't realize this place meant so much to you."

"It's our home, Ranma. Of course it means a lot to us."

Ranma tried to imagine what it might be like, to have home. A place where she belonged. Did she have that when her mother was alive? Why couldn't she remember? How much would she give to have that again? What would she be willing to do? Ranma closed her eyes. "Nabiki…she feels the same way, doesn't she?"

Akane didn't say anything.

Ranma opened her eyes and looked at the altar. "It's because of her that you've been able to stay here, isn't it? I mean, I heard her say that before, but I didn't really get it."

"She went over the line, Ranma…"

"Did she?" Ranma turned to Akane. "I mean, maybe it's just guilt or something. But it just doesn't seem that bad now."

"You don't have anything to feel guilty about, Ranma. She deserved that punch."

Ranma nodded silently. Akane hadn't seen what she had seen. Akane hadn't felt the blood rushing out of the wound, or the skull… Nabiki was okay, Ranma reminded herself. Nothing but some superficial wounds.

"So, what does the note say?" Akane asked brightly, breaking Ranma from her mood.

Ranma opened the note so that both she and Akane could read it. There were a lot of complicated kanji. Some Ranma only knew because she had been in China. There was a time, and something about a hill…

"It looks like a challenge," Akane noted.

"Yeah," Ranma said, "I guess that's what it is."

~~~~~.~~~~~

Some time around six o'clock at night, Ranma returned. "Is Kasumi or any of the others back yet?" Ranma asked Akane when she found her in the living room watching television while doing some basic stretches.

"No. Kasumi called to say that she'd be staying over at the hospital until tomorrow, and as for our fathers, my guess is they're eating at whatever bar they found on the way over here. What happened with Kuno?" Akane glanced pointedly at the bouquet of roses Ranma held in her hand.

Ranma looked at them herself. "Yeah. Do you know what to do with these? I don't know whether to throw them in the trash or put them in water or what. I mean they look like pretty decent roses, but… Um… Let's just say Kuno didn't want to fight me."

Akane got up and took the bouquet like a wad of soiled diapers and walked it right to the trashcan in the kitchen, throwing it in the bin in a quick violent gesture. Then Akane walked back to her place in front of the television and sat. "Problem solved," she said.

Ranma crossed her arms under her chest. "Thanks."

"I hate roses," Akane said simply looking at the television screen.

Ranma scratched the back of her head. "Good to know. So…I guess dinner's up to us?"

Akane sat up, a smile brightening her face, as the television was completely forgotten. "Yes, Ranma. I think so!"

An uneasy feeling crept down Ranma's back like ice water.

The next recipe in Akane's mother's book was for ramen. And thankfully there were some packages of instant ramen available in the pantry. The range was still broken, and there wasn't any hot water. So Ranma resurrected the fire Genma used to heat his kettle and had Akane, under her supervision, put a pot of water on it.

Thankfully Ranma smelled the liquid in the pot before putting in the ramen. "Akane, why does this water smell like rubbing alcohol?"

Akane blinked. "I was thinking that it might make the Ramen cook faster. I'm kind of hungry."

Ranma nodded and patiently took the pot of water mixed with antiseptic into the kitchen before pouring it down the sink. "Akane?" she started.

"Yes?"

"Akane," she tried again. "I'm kinda hungry too? And my, uh 'challenge' with Kuno… kinda weirded me out? So if in the next hour or so, if I snap and start screaming at ya, don't take it too hard 'kay?"

Akane nodded.

"Okay, now, Akane? Where did you find the rubbing alcohol?"

"In the bathroom."

"Yes," Ranma smiled, showing more teeth than usual, "good. You remember. Now, I think it is fairly safe to say that there is absolutely NOTHING in the bathroom that anyone would care to eat. Would you agree?"

"I guess."

Ranma closed her eyes and scrunched up her forehead. "You…guess?"

"Well I mean, what if the bathroom sink's the only place we can get water?" Akane held up a finger, "And…and toothpaste…that has sugar in it and tastes minty, so if we ever were starving we could eat that. And mouthwash, I've seen Dad drink that sometimes…"

Ranma held up her hand. "Akane, stop, please. You're not stupid, okay? You were being creative, that's good. But let's rein it in a little. We're not yet desperate enough to eat toothpaste or any of that. So let's just go ahead and say that the bathroom is off limits for cooking. Can we agree to that?"

"Okay."

"Akane. I wanna hear you say it. Say, 'I will not cook using any ingredients from the bathroom.'"

"I will not cook using any ingredients from the bathroom." Akane dutifully repeated. "But…I thought it was okay to cook with alcohol. It burns off doesn't it? Like with wine?"

"Okay, I can see where you might've gotten confused. There's more than one kind of alcohol, Akane. There's ethyl alcohol which is in sake and mouthwash and other stuff like that. And then there's a whole bunch of other alcohols, which will kill you if you drink 'em. Rubbing alcohol will kill you if you drink it, you understand? Death comes to those who partake of that fluid. If you drink rubbing alcohol you become deceased. An inanimate object. Worm food. The thread of your existence will be cut short by the fates."

"Okay, I get it! Honestly!"

"Akane, If any of us die, that's a bad thing. That's the opposite of what we're trying to accomplish. We're clear on that, right?"

"YES! I'm sorry! It won't happen again!"

"We're using your mother's cookbook. We're following her recipe, right?"

"Right."

"So we don't need to improve on it, do we?"

"I guess not. I mean, no we don't."

Ranma picked up the notebook from the kitchen counter. "Look at the recipe. What are the ingredients it lists?"

"Water and ramen noodles," Akane read.

"That's all it says?"

"Yes."

"There's no eye of newt or pig bladder extract or anything?"

"Um…no."

"Good. Then how about we stick to that shall we? Let's trust your mother at least that much." Ranma put the notebook back on the counter and started rummaging around for another pot to use.

"That's…kind of low, Ranma."

"Yeah?" Ranma brought out a pot. "Well, like I said, I'm hungry."

When Ranma and Akane were done with the ramen, the house was still empty. Empty and quiet. They didn't say anything at first, they just filled their bowls with noodles, sat across from each other at the dinner table and started eating.

"It's strange how the hot water is broken everywhere in the house, isn't it?" Akane asked.

"Yeah. Strange."

"And the range too. Do you think that was because of when we were boiling water earlier?"

"You mean when you nearly set the house on fire?" Ranma asked sharply.

Akane gave a hurt look.

Ranma sighed. "No I don't think the water and the range being broken is your fault. Maybe you contributed a little. But I think that it's pretty much me and Pops."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't think Kasumi is all that happy with us." Ranma gave Akane a sidelong glance as she helped some noodles into her mouth with her chopsticks.

"Wait, you think…You think Kasumi sabotaged her own kitchen and furo?"

Ranma shrugged, swallowing. "I've been thinkin' 'bout it since we started on the noodles the second time. She seems nice and all, but she was kinda actin' like a bitch at the hospital. And I'm wondering if maybe she's just expressin' herself differently. Like, here she's this peaceful person, and my pops and your pops are tryin' ta get her into the art again. Well Pops needs hot water to turn back into a human and your father kinda relies on her for food. So…It's kinda a way for her to fight without fighting."

Akane shook her head, "Kasumi isn't that petty."

Ranma held her hands up, "It's just a theory. I ain't sayin' it's true." She went back to her noodle bowl.

Akane was about to do the same, but then she said, "Although…"

"Yeah?"

Akane put her bowl down. "Well, okay, when I first tried to cook I kind of messed up the kitchen a little?"

"I'll bet." Ranma deadpanned.

"Right," Akane soldiered on, "so Kasumi was very kind about it as usual; she forgave me and everything, but then, that night, there were thumbtacks in my bed."

"Thumbtacks."

"Yes. I asked Nabiki about it and she didn't know anything, and Kasumi said she didn't know either. I knew Dad wouldn't do something like that, so I figured Nabiki had been lying. But, well… Kasumi is the one that makes the beds."

Ranma nodded. "This is good." She pointed in the air with her chopsticks smiling.

"What?"

"Well, you see, Kasumi really isn't a pacifist at all is she? I mean, I don't know about you, but I consider getting stuck with thumbtacks or being made to starve to be kinda violent, just a different kind of violence."

Akane shook her head and picked up her bowl to eat from it "I'm sorry, I'm still trying to get over Kasumi reading that smut she reads, I'm not quite ready to accept that she might be violent." She ate a few bites of her noodles as she looked at a random spot on the table.

Ranma watched her for awhile. Then she picked up her bowl and ate the rest of her noodles she drank the remaining liquid and stood up with the bowl. "I could still be wrong, but there's a good way to find out."

Akane paused before her next bite looking up at Ranma. "How?"

"We fix the range and the hot water. If we fix everything, and it all breaks right away, or if Kasumi escalates things we'll know, won't we?"

"But I don't know how to fix a range or the hot water or anything, do you?"

"No," Ranma looked off toward the kitchen, "… but if my guess is right, then Kasumi probably didn't really break them, she just turned them off somehow. Like maybe there's a switch or something she knows about." Ranma smiled at Akane, "So if we find that, we can turn everything back on and see how she reacts."

Akane finished her bowl of noodles and stood up herself "Well, okay, but how does this help us?"

"We need Kasumi to start training with us, right? Only she's a 'pacifist' so it would normally be hard to get her on board. But here's the thing: there's different types of martial art. I once studied at a school for trap setting. The master there could have you stuck to the floor and covered in fire ants before you even saw him move. I was never able to beat him, but I learned a few things. Anyway, I figure if Kasumi doesn't want to play by our rules, we can just play by hers."

Akane was silent for long while. "You're wrong about Kasumi," she said finally."She doesn't set traps, she's a nice person. She cares about people."

Ranma shrugged. "You're a nice person. You care about people. But you still punch people in the face every now and then right? I ain't sayin' she's evil or nothin', just that she ain't quite the piece of soggy bread she seems." Ranma got up and took her bowl into the kitchen.

Akane followed her. After Akane set her bowl in the sink, she paused for a moment, crouched down and opened the cabinet underneath. "Sometimes, I see Kasumi adjust something here…"

There was silence for a moment, then Akane backed out of the cabinet and gave Ranma a look. Ranma reached to the faucet and turned the hot water on. Within five minutes steam was coming out of the sink. "I'm sorry Akane. I didn't mean to…" She wasn't sure how to finish.

Akane held her hand up. "No, Ranma. You didn't do anything. I've been fooling myself about Kasumi for years. You were just being honest. You've always been honest with me, even though I've made it difficult for you sometimes. I should be the one to apologize."

"What do you mean?"

Akane looked surprised. "No! I mean I…I don't have…!" She closed her eyes and let out a breath."I…I really needed a friend, Ranma. A real friend." Akane turned away from Ranma as she continued. "You've met Sayuri and Yuka, you know how they are. And everyone's pressuring me to date boys but every one of them acts like a creep to me, thinking I'll love them if they beat me up." She lifted a clenched fist. "That's sick isn't it? Isn't that perverted? And everything I read just makes me more sure that boys have something wrong with them."

"Yeah, uh..that sucks…" Ranma hesitantly patted Akane on the back, not sure where she was going with this.

Akane whirled back around, looking Ranma in the eye."I knew you were really…a boy as soon as I heard the story about Jusenkyo. I just…" Akane averted her gaze. "…you had already gotten stuck and I needed you to be a girl so I just, I just pretended I didn't understand. I've always done things like that. It's how I dealt with Mom dying, with us nearly losing the house, I don't even realize I'm doing it sometimes, but this time…I didn't think about how it would affect you."

Ranma felt a flash of anger. Part of her wanted to scream at Akane, but the other part, the lonely part, completely understood. "It's…okay. I kinda get it." She spoke in a monotone.

"But it's not okay! I lied to you, Ranma! All this time I've been trying to get you to act more like a girl and I knew you were really…"

Ranma held up a hand."Look, I ain't gonna lie, I'm a bit pissed about that, but, well, what it comes down to is I did this to myself, so I might as well make the best of it, and really it hasn't been as bad as I thought it would. I just gotta keep remindin' myself, 'It's okay, I'm a girl.'"

"But if you're a boy inside…"

Ranma gritted her teeth. "No I'm not, dammit! When I have this body I'm a girl. It don't matter how I might think about things or what I was before. That's just the way it is. If I go around sayin' I'm really a guy, well then I'm just a girl who thinks she's a guy, and that's stupid! Why the fuck did you have to say anything? I was almost able to forget and then you had be all observant all of a sudden!"

"You wanted to forget you were once a boy?" Akane looked confused.

"Gods damn it! No! I don't know. I wanted to forget this fucking problem, alright? This not knowing whether I'm screwed up or not. Or rather how screwed up I am. I still feel like a guy most of the time, ya know? I try to tell myself I'm a girl, but it just feels wrong."

"But, well…why didn't you kiss Nabiki back?"

"I don't know! Okay? You're a girl right? Would you let a guy kiss you like that?"

"No way!" Akane yelled. "I mean. I'm not…but…hmmm."

"Yeah. No offense but I don't know if I'd call you the expert on sexual orientation here."

"I'm not a lesbian, Ranma!"

"I ain't sayin' you are. Gods! But this whole, 'all boys are perverts' thing. Ya gotta know that it ain't always true, right? I mean how are you ever gonna get a husband if ya keep thinkin' any boy you meet is gonna molest you or somethin?"

"But it's true! I've read it in books. Medical books! The average teenage boy masturbates twelve times a month! And that's the average! So half of them do it more often. Twelve times a month they practice raping girls. That's almost every other day! How is that not perverted?"

"I never practiced raping a girl!" Ranma made a mental note to find out what "masturbating" really meant. She hoped Akane was exaggerating.

"That's because you were turned into a girl just in time! If you were a normal boy you would have became a pervert just like the rest of them! I'd be just some hole you could stick your…thing into and you'd never think I was really worth anything! You barely think I'm worth anything as it is!"

"I thought you were my friend!" Ranma turned and ran away to the guest room, closing the door behind her.

She sat down on the floor, tears breaking through her eyelids like icepicks. "Fucking girl body." The words came out as a whimper. Ranma made a fist and slammed it against the floor. Hard enough for her knuckles to bleed. The pain made her feel a little better. Physical pain she could deal with. It was this other stuff, this feeling like her heart was getting batted around by a team of cats playing around in her stomach, that she couldn't fathom.

"I ran away. Again." Ranma rubbed her temples as a wave of guilt washed over her. It was typical of her though, wasn't it? Her air-like style? Never staying in one place, always using little guerrilla maneuvers and running away. Always adapting, but never really changing.

She should go back. She should talk to Akane. Apologize maybe, even though she hadn't really done anything wrong. Had she done something wrong? It was Akane that had fucking lied to her! Ranma shook her head. No. She had to get her strategy straight. This was just like any other battle. She just had to figure out how best to attack the problem and then she'd go after it.

~~~~~.~~~~~

Three hours later, Genma had come into the room, smelling of sake. With a perfunctory grunt at Ranma that would have done his panda form proud, he collapsed onto his futon and fell asleep.

Ranma got up and turned the light off. Light from the street filled the room with false moonlight giving the room a mysterious air. Ranma slowly took off her shirt and pants and climbed into her own futon. She still hadn't talked with Akane since she went off in a huff. She had spent all this time thinking, and still hadn't figured anything out.

Akane knew. All day, she had known that Ranma used to be a guy and yet she had insisted that she talk like a girl. Every jab at her masculinity was real, not just some assurance to a fellow tomboy. Ranma was out half the day in a dress and Akane knew all that time that she used to be a boy.

Used to be?

Ranma gritted her teeth. Yes, used to be. Because just as she had repeated to Akane earlier it was simply true that she was a girl and would be for a while. She could be a man inside all she wanted, and she could raise any number of protestations but that wouldn't change the physical reality of her situation.

Genma snored beside her in a slow rhythm. It wasn't a terribly loud snore, and Ranma usually found it comforting. Tonight though, she felt like she had betrayed her father. All this time she had been telling herself that she had done what she had done because she was lonely, because she wanted friendship. That was true, but still, in her head there was this wrinkle. Akane had lied to her. For more than a day Akane made her think she didn't know she had been a boy, and as much as Ranma wanted to let that go, it still bothered her. It seemed a little evil, Akane using her like she had. She said she was sorry and it all seemed okay, but if Ranma was going to forgive Akane something like that, why should she be all bent out of shape about Nabiki taking a few photos?

And it wasn't like Akane was an easy friend to have. Sometimes she seemed like a spoiled little princess, and she tried Ranma's patience any number of times. Yet here she was, stuck as a girl because she wanted to be Akane's friend. Stuck as a girl when her father wanted her to be a man. The one constant in her life had always been her father and taking the vial was tantamount to a betrayal, and she felt it with every snore.

She wasn't really angry with Akane for lying. That was part of the problem. She was okay with it. And it was disturbing just how okay with it she was. There was some reasoning that supported letting it go. After all she had gone this far to be Akane's friend why throw all that away? And wasn't Ranma using Akane to get over her own problems? So what was she angry about? Her telling the truth? What the fuck sort of sense did that make?

Akane seemed to have so many more problems. Her entire family had some kind of issue or another it seemed, she wasn't sure whether she wanted to be a martial artist or a housewife of some kind, and she had this temper that flared up occasionally. That was just the start of it.

Ranma shook her head. It wasn't true. Ranma had just as many problems if not more. Prominent among them not being the sex she was used to. But then there was Shampoo, the hair that would grow out wildly if she turned into a guy again and did not have the dragon whisker tying it off, and her father. But Akane's problems just seemed to be more in the foreground and it made Ranma forget about her problems. It was kind of nice worrying about someone else's issues for a change.

Maybe that was it. Maybe it was simply that being friends with Akane was worth it, even if she had lied. But then maybe it had something to do with the many times on the road when Ranma looked at the vial and fantasized about drinking it and telling her father, "I'm a girl now, so you can't tell me what to do!" and going back to China on her own.

There were things she liked about being a girl. It was fun with Akane. And every time she did something "girly" she knew it was something that her father wouldn't approve of. She felt free, and the freedom was exhilarating.

Tonight though, lying next to her father, it seemed less like the good kind of freedom and more like the kind of freedom you get when you're dangling from a precipice and the man above you cuts you from the line.

She felt herself drifting further from her father, and it was a little frightening. All the more so when he was lying next to her. Ranma sighed and got out of her futon. She opened her window and climbed up the roof, the cool night air cutting through her tank top and boxers. She crawled down to Akane's window and tapped on it. Akane turned on her light after a moment and opened the window, bleary-eyed. "Ranma?"

"Yeah. I can't sleep. Pops is snorin' somethin' fierce. Could I camp out on your floor?"

Akane nodded, "Come on in. You know you could have just used the door." Akane turned away as Ranma entered and shuffled to her dresser where, after rummaging through some clothes, she found something and turned back to Ranma. "Here, wear this. You're peeking out all over the place." She handed Ranma a simple nightgown.

Ranma took the garment with a grimace. Her tank top wasn't really doing a good job of hiding her assets. Without letting herself think about it too much she pulled off her tank top and pulled on the night gown.

"Much better. You want to talk about…earlier?"

"Not really. Just, sorry for runnin' out like that."

"Girls are like that, Ranma. It's okay. I shouldn't have said the things I said. Maybe not all boys are perverts. Maybe, if it's you, I can be friends with a boy."

Ranma swallowed. "You know I'll be a boy again in six months, right?"

Akane nodded and then yawned. "I'm too tired to talk right now, and I don't know if I have any extra sheets. There should be space enough for both of us in the bed though if that's okay."

"You're okay with that?"

"We're both girls, right?" Akane climbed into bed, leaving space for Ranma

"Right." Ranma said. She walked to the other side of the bed.

"And you're not a lesbian?"

"No," Ranma said and lay down on the bed. It was amazingly comfortable. Ranma was already fading as soon as her head hit the pillow. She took in a deep breath and let it out. "I'm not sure what I am," she muttered to herself.

But Akane heard her and she said. "You're my best friend." Her left hand found Ranma's right and they clasped together tightly, like two halves of a locket.

~~~~~.~~~~~

Ranma lowers herself into the steaming furo slowly, luxuriating in the heat as it passes over her body.

"Have you told anybody about the hot water working?" Akane smiles at the other end of the furo.

Ranma shakes her head no. "I figure we'll let them find out when we come out of the furo."

Akane nods. "So what was with the dream you had this morning? You were mumbling something about Kuno?"

Ranma looks at herself in the hot water of the furo and remembers the dream. Kuno showing up naked in the furo. Ranma saying she was a guy, only of course she wasn't. Falling through the furo onto the school campus, the water from the furo turning into rain. Ranma now wearing a frilly dress. Kuno pointing his sword at her. Ranma taking a stance. Then kuno throwing something at her, and it turning out to be a bouquet of roses. Then a string of Kunos encircling her and saying "I love you, I would date with you," over and over.

Ranma swallows. "I'm not sure I want to say."

"Was it a nightmare?" Akane asks.

"I think so," Ranma says. "I guess."

Akane moves closer to Ranma, putting her hand on her shoulder. "What happened with Kuno yesterday? Was it just the flowers, or was there something else?"

Ranma looks at Akane. "Well I thought he had come for a challenge, only he didn't have his bokuto with him. So I said 'You're pretty confident, aren't you?', and he said 'Confident enough you give you this.' That was when he threw the flowers to me. I caught them before I knew what they were, you know, and when I I saw they were flowers I…I…"

"Did you kick his ass? That's what I would have done," Akane smiles, brandishing a fist.

"No," Ranma frowns. "I just sorta…crumpled to the ground. I was so surprised."

"Huh?"

"And then Kuno turned back as he was walking away, and he told me he loved me."

"And THEN you kicked his ass right?"

Ranma frowns. "No. I just…got up and went back to the house. Then we were cooking and I sort of forgot about it."

"Ranma, you can't encourage Kuno like that! He probably thinks you're okay with it now!"

"Yeah," Ranma says slowly. "I shoulda just kicked his ass."

"You aren't okay with it, are you?" Akane backs away.

"No!" Ranma shakes her head. "It's just… No one ever gave me flowers before. No one ever told me they loved me like that." Except for you, Akane, Ranma amends in her thoughts, but of course that doesn't really count. That was just a joke. Why did she even think of that?

Akane rolls her eyes "Believe me; that gets old REAL quick."

They don't have much time before they have to get out of the furo and get ready for school. They pass the rest of the time in silence. Ranma is left to her thoughts. If she were still able to turn into a man, she would. But she isn't. She isn't a man. So why should she get upset when a boy gives her flowers and tells her she loves her? Of course people are going to love her. After all she had a sexy body didn't she? Why should she be shocked when they told her as much? And if she plays her cards right, she might be able to learn a few new moves from Kuno. That trick with making the air cut things is pretty neat… And so far as she knows Kuno hasn't lied to her yet.

Akane has her eyes closed with a washcloth on her head, oblivious to Ranma's cogitations.

If Ranma can be friends with her, she wonders, why couldn't she be friends with Kuno? He makes a lot of boasts of course, and he is a pompous ass, and she isn't the least bit attracted to him, but as long as he keeps telling her how great she is maybe…

Ranma shakes her head and lifts herself out of the furo. She figures the heat must be getting to her. She couldn't seriously be thinking of going out with Kuno…could she?

~~~~~End of Chapter 6~~~~~

5/10/10-

Fixed an inconsistency with the duration of the vial's effectiveness. Thanks, Dumbledork!