CHAPTER VII

One month earlier

Janet

"What about you, kid? You all right?"

"Why wouldn't I be? Come on, old man, start the car. Let's go save the world."

The man rounded the nearest corner and pulled over. "Hang on, we have time. I want to talk to you."

"Go ahead. Have you forgotten how to drive and talk? In that case, let me behind the wheel."

"Hang on, I said." He turned off the ignition. "You do realize what's at stake here, don't you?"

"I didn't know I needed a refresher course," she said coldly.

"Your timing for this visit could've been better. You need to bring your A-game. I can't have you upset or distracted."

"Oh, give me a break. My friends had seen neither hide nor hair of me in years. My family thinks I am dead. But I never took an oath to become a machine. Are you really going to begrudge me the few remnants of humanity I have left in me?"

"In case you haven't noticed, we are all machines. We are each other's family and friends. That's the only way, and you knew it going in. You can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen."

The woman glared at her companion. "Okay, old man, what's with the riot act? You know better than to imply I'm going to compromise the mission just because I spent thirty minutes with my old friends. Have I ever given you any reason to doubt my commitment?"

"Your commitment, never. Your motivation is a different story."

"With all due respect, my motivation is none of your fucking business as long as I do my job. Are you saying I haven't been – "

"Simmer down. You are one of the best in the whole Company, if not the best. And you know it."

"Then what's really going on here?" Her eyes softened. She moved closer to the man and put a hand on his shoulder. "Look, Tom, whatever's bothering you, quit speaking in riddles. We've always been able to level with each other, even if we've had to put up a front for everybody else."

"Okay," he said gruffly. "If you are sure you wanna hear it."

She gave a small laugh. "I am sure I don't. But if you are so keen on saying it, it must be important. So, shoot. I'm listening."

"I was just going over in my head all I know about you – "

"Which is all there is to know and then some. Probably more than I know about myself. Our background checks are solid."

" – and what you told me about that old gang of yours you just visited. That guy back there. The love of your life, isn't he?"

"Can't see the relevance but let's go with that."

"And he married your best friend, didn't he?"

"He did. Years ago and very happily. What's any of that got to do with you? If you think I've been so shaken up by seeing them that I would jeopardize the mission, you don't know me as well as you think."

"I'm not finished. Let's see if I got it right. You had that guy wrapped around your little finger. He had been quite a player, whoring it all over L.A., until you got your claws in him. Wouldn't have looked at another gal if you hadn't walked out on him and married that other guy."

"Tom, what is this? Where are you going with all this?"

"And you never really gave a fuck about either of them."

"What are you, morality police all of a sudden? Who cares about what I did or didn't do years ago, or why?"

"Just trying to establish a pattern. Bear with me here, OK?"

"Not that it's any of your business but I did love Jack. Way too much for my liking. I was afraid I'd lose myself in him if I didn't get out while I still could."

"Perish the thought. So, you used a guy you didn't love to get away from the guy you loved. And just a few months down the road you used me and the Company to get away from all that – your boring husband, your boring job..."

"Where do you get off judging me, Tom? Don't get me started on your own track record with women. And what's that about my job? I loved my job!"

"I have no doubt you had loved it to begin with. But by the time I met you, it was starting to feel stale. I remember seeing you for the first time in that shop of yours. Doing the work of five people with nary a misstep, chatting up the customers, charming the pants off everyone... bored out of your skull."

"Nonsense. Don't know where you are getting your insights but – "

"By that time, you've been doing it for how long? Close to ten years? You were fabulous at it, but you had taken it as far as it could go, and it was nowhere near enough for you. You wanted more – something more exciting, more challenging – "

"More meaningful, perhaps? You make me sound as nothing more than a thrill seeker. I happen to believe in what we do."

"Listen, Janet – "

She chuckled bitterly. "Oh man, I've almost forgotten how my actual name sounds. When did you or anybody else last call me anything but Dubois? So, pray tell, why are you dredging up ancient history?"

"I am just wondering where you go from here."

"You have lousy timing for your wondering. You know very well where I am supposed to go from here right now – someplace I am badly needed. So, if you are done with the walk down the memory lane – "

"We have time. The flight is not until 23:00."

"What?! You told me 22:00!"

"So I did. I needed this extra hour to have this chat with you. Otherwise, I'd never have gotten you to sit and talk long enough."

She sighed. "Okay, you got me now."

"Where was I? Right, when I first saw you... Didn't take me long to figure out I was looking at the perfect operative in the making. You had all it takes. Brilliant, efficient, tough as nails, able to think on your feet, charismatic, sexy as hell... I knew with just a little training you would be outstanding. And also that if we didn't grab you right away, some other outfit would before long – Interpol, FBI, whatever. You were made for this kind of work."

The woman laughed. "Listen to yourself, old man! All the world's leading intelligence services were gonna hang around my obscure flower shop in Brooklyn in search of new recruits! Besides, it was you who taught me all I know."

"Right. I guess six months at the Farm counts for nothing."

"That, too. Thank you, I am flattered. Still, you seem to have left a few things out of that glowing description."

"I'm aware your sterling qualities are too many to list – "

"I am not in it just for the cheap thrills, you know! Do you even give me credit for such trifles as conviction, principles, believing in doing the right thing? You and the Farm may have given me the skills. But doing the right thing at any cost – that's how my parents raised me. It's always meant a lot to me, ever since I was a kid. And I did love my job and was good at it. In fact, just around the time I met you I was thinking of starting my own business. Probably would've made millions by this time if I had."

"I don't doubt that for a second. However, at your pay grade, you are not doing too badly for yourself now either."

"Technically. I never have a chance to spend or enjoy whatever I make. No complaints, though. If I had gone into business for myself and even if I had been as successful as I think, somewhere along the line I know I would've wanted to drop it all and get out of there. I've always known there were things more worth doing than amassing wealth. Just didn't know how to get into that until – "

"Until a certain old man walked into your shop."

"No kidding. Talk about being in the right place at the right time. Okay, Tom. It was nice to reminisce. Now, what are we really doing here? The bottom line."

"The bottom line, Dubois – Damn it, Janet. The bottom line is, I worry about you."

"I beg your pardon?! What's so worrisome about me? Is something wrong?"

"There's not a thing wrong with you, kid. Something must be seriously wrong with me."

"Perfect, more riddles. Could we move this along, please?"

"Gee, slow down, will you? You think this is so easy to talk about? Me, a seasoned – "

"Uh-oh. Something tells me I'm not gonna want to hear it."

"You are gonna whether you wanna or not. Every time you are out on a mission, I have my heart in my mouth until you are safely back. Until I at least know – "

"You've flipped, old man. You've lost it. Am I the only one putting my life on the line?"

"Maybe I don't care as much about all the others as – "

"So that's what it's all about! Classic projection! Pretending to question my motives while in fact it's you who needs to get your priorities straight! You know very well you are not supposed to treat any one of us under your command differently than the others."

"Yep, I know."

"Wasn't it you who impressed upon me that what we had between us was just an arrangement, and not to get clingy or emotional? I learned that lesson the hard way. What are you doing now, going all sappy on me?"

"Things change," said the man curtly.

"The rules haven't changed. Only thing that's changed is that you've grown old and soft. Maybe it's time you got out of the game if you can't handle it."

"Maybe it is. In fact, that's just what I've been thinking about."

"What's any of that to do with me? Oh no, don't tell me. White picket fence and a pair of rockers on the porch, is that it?"

"You read my mind."

"Well, you are on your own. I'm still decades away from it. And when I get too old to do what I am doing now, I'll switch to recruiting and training. Just like you did in your time. And when I get too old for that – damn right I'll get out of the game before I become a liability."

"Fair enough."

"And don't tell me I'm the only one you've been sleeping with. This was never about romance or feelings, just convenience."

"Believe what you want. True, there have been others but not recently. Not since – since around the time I got with you."

The young woman shrugged. "Well, it's your problem. Should I feel honored?"

"Look here, I am not proud of it! I told you it wasn't easy talking about this."

"Then don't! Nobody's forcing you to! I'd much rather you didn't."

"Wondering every second where you are, what you are doing out there – "

"Old fool. This is beyond inappropriate – "

"I said I was not proud of it. No need to rub it in. I am ashamed, damn it. Worst thing is, it's not just the danger. It's also – "

"What?"

"Can't stop thinking about who you are fucking out there."

"Don't you dare! You've really crossed the line here, old man. I don't have to tell you it's all – "

" – all part of the job. I know. Still – "

"Still, nothing! If you know it's part of the job, then shut up. You know very well I never fuck or kill unless there's no other way."

"Even that broad in Morocco last year – "

"Yep, even that broad. You think I do it for my own amusement? I don't even swing that way, as you very well know. But if that broad hadn't led me straight to her boss, he would've blown up half the continent before I could get to him. If you don't think that was worth eating a little – "

"Okay, okay, I get the picture."

"Tom. You are certifiably insane, you know that? You are sick, you crazy old fool."

"I know. You've got to understand something, Janet. At my age, you may well be my last."

"Nonsense. You are still virile enough for – "

"Well, if anybody should know – "

They sat in silence, their shoulders touching. Then she said gently:

"Okay, old man, your hour's up. We really need to get going now. Listen, we'll talk about this when I get back, okay? I promise. Right now, we do have a world to save."

"Okay. Just make sure you come back."

"I always do, don't I?"

"Just come back, okay?" He turned the key in the ignition and added hoarsely: "Alive".

...

Three days later

"Sorry, boss, she wasn't at the exfil coordinates. There was no message from her and no response when we tried to raise her. We did a discreet search of the area. Nothing."

Colonel Thomas Langdon, a.k.a. the Old Man, cast the comm device he was using a dirty look.

"She didn't just vanish into thin air, Haley."

"No, sir, of course not. If she was made, she might've been hurt of captured or – "

"Or worse." Langdon scowled and was silent for a few beats. "Or she could be hiding out somewhere. And – and she knows what to do in case she's captured."

"As do we all. So what are the orders, boss?"

"You need to ask? Dubois is no throwaway. Keep searching."

"Yes, sir." Haley paused. "Sorry, sir. You don't think she might've – "

"No, I don't, and I suggest you don't, either! You know better than to think that." Langdon's face became livid. "Continue with the search until further notice."

He broke the connection, clutched his head in his hands and sat immobile.

It was his job to know every thought of every operative under his command. And to zero in on those likely to entertain the thought of crossing over. When it came to this operative, however – He should be in a position to know best. And yet, he sometimes wondered if he knew anything at all...

5