Immortal Coil

A South Park Fanfiction by Andew Joshua Talon

DISCLAIMER: This is a non profit fan based work of prose. South Park, et al are the property of Trey Parker, Matt Stone, and Viacom. Please support the official release.

Stan walked into the Tegridy farmhouse with a lot of trepidation. Sam had offered to come in with him, but he had declined.

He had to do this himself.

The morning light shone through the windows, onto Randy Marsh as he sat on the couch. The middle aged man looked terrible, dark bags under his eyes, as he sat hunched over. He slowly looked up at his son.

"Stan," he breathed, half anxious and half relieved, "I... I didn't know if you'd come."

"Well, ya know," Stan shrugged, "didn't have much else to do."

Randy swallowed, and slowly nodded.

"If I'd known what he had done-I... I'm so sorry, son. I really, truly am. I failed you. Again."

"Yeah, well, we both did," Stan admitted. He sat down next to his father. They stared at the turned off TV together for a time, saying nothing.

"I am glad you're safe, Stan," Randy said, "I'm so thankful."

"I know," Stan said, "thanks to my friends."

Randy smiled. "The best kind of friends," he said. "Anyway... I know it will take time and hard work but... I want to earn your trust again. And make things right. To you, and Eric."

"Why Cartman?" Stan asked with a scowl. Randy chuckled.

"I know he's a monster but... Much of it is down to how he was raised. He needed a dad to knock some sense into him. And, well... I need to be a better father. You guys haven't given up on him, have you?"

"I guess not," Stan admitted, "but we also try to keep an eye on him."

"Being a parent means keeping your child from doing stupid crap," Randy said with a nod, "and being better so they don't get your bad habits. And hope that some day, they'll understand why you did what you did."

Randy got up and walked to the kitchen. Stan followed, a bit confused. They went out onto the back porch, where Randy smiled happily.

"And while it may take a while for Cartman to learn, I'm committed to making sure he does, with a carrot... And a stick."

Eric Cartman moaned as he pulled a wagon. Bare chested, his jelly rolls wobbled as he pulled the full wagon. Behind him, dressed in a leather cowgirl outfit (that was a little too brief for Stan's taste) was Shelly Marsh... Wielding a whip.

"YA! YAH, YA TURD!" Shelly shouted, cracking the whip over Cartman's back.

"YEEEROOOWWW! OW OWWW!" Cartman cried.

"FASTER TURD! WE'RE GONNA NEED A LOT MORE HEMP BEFORE WE'RE THROUGH!" Shelly shouted.

"Should've gone to jail, should've gone to jail," Cartman moaned. Another whip strike cracked across his back. "YEEEOWW!

"Ya got two hundred wagon loads to do before I consider you taking me on a date, Turd!" Shelly shouted. "HURRY IT UP!"

"YES SHELLY!" Cartman shouted as he pulled the wagon as fast as he could.

Stan just blinked several times. He looked at his father, who smiled.

"Apparently Shelly enjoys beating boys into men. Two birds with one stone, ya know?"

"... Is this even legal?" Stan asked.

"You'd be amazed at what counts as therapy these days," Randy confided.

"Huh. No kidding."

Just a nice little coda...