# Partners

"I will be getting out of our team, Natsu. Let's split up, from now on." I forced a smile to convince him.

I decided to finally free him from having me like his responsibility. There was a day that I suddenly recalled his joy when he finally see Lisanna again. There was a heart in his throat. After that, nothing much changed. But as days passed by, I realized something was wrong. Everytime I get into trouble, Natsu will always be the one leading the team to come find me. There was once he said, "I had come to rescue you, dummy."

That time I thought it was so sweet of him but overtime I felt like, I became his burden. Why did it come to this, I was clueless. I have forgotten about how time raced making myself contented with what I have with Natsu and Happy.

Sometimes I think, did I become insensitive? I never ask Natsu if he wants to form a team with another, especially Lisanna. I've heard of their past and the sadness Natsu felt before became evident the last time he dreamt of her and somehow got mad at me for unknowingly telling a thing Lisanna might have said to him before.

My heart ached for letting him go but I hate the taste of greed and jealousy I am feeling when I am in no position to bear those things.

Besides, I'm falling for Natsu. Yes, I am aware and I am not dense enough to ignore every beat of my heart for the man. And that only strengthen my resolve to let him savour again the life he had lost. His happiness is the most important thing for me.

I felt so bad for being just a nuisance to him. Protecting me as always. Staying by my side and all. Maybe because he was the one who took me in that he cannot find a way to leave me alone.

The reason why I told him now that we should be separated. It was to assure him that I will be fine and stable now. I will not need him anymore by my side to feel the familiarity of the guild. In fact, I am so much in depth now with them that awkwardness will have no room for all of us.

Now it's my turn to reciprocate the favour. He'd done so much for me. I am embarrassed to hold all of his time when he should be going on a missions with the first partner he went to and supposed to be still.

She was the original and I don't intend of stealing that. I will not take it if their supposed to be much deeper bond will have no chance merely because of me.

That's the right thing to do, so I held my ground.

"What are you saying, Lucy?" Natsu asked, confusion written all over his face. Happy looked up to his partner with saddened face.

"I said, I think we should go separate ways. I'll be fine, Natsu. I'm okay now. Maybe I can join Levy's team or Gray's while you, you can go back to what you should be doing before. Lisanna is alive, at least, continue going on missions with her." I explained. I've rehearsed myself being calm before I suggested it to him because I know that I might cry.

"L-Lushii, you don't want to be with us anymore?" Happy asked, eyes worried. I kneeled in front of him and caress his fur under his ears. "That's not what I meant, Happy. We can still go on missions but at some random dates. I'm just saying that for now, let's try being with other members. Maybe we can find a well-matched comrade."

"But, we're partners, Lucy." He whispered silently, still wearing a vexed reaction.

I looked straight into his eyes and I melted within. It conveys something I could not fathom. I giggled to resist the awkward air.

"C'mon Natsu! We started for a mission necessary for blondes. And I'm not saying we cannot go on together anymore on jobs. Maybe once a year or one a month, we'll regroup. Natsu, you should be more sociable and me too, this our time to know how we are with others. Not just always us."

I think I saw hurt in his eyes, his forehead formed a crease. Have I said something wrong? Am I being insensitive again?

"Aren't you happy anymore?" Natsu clenched his fist and hid behind his bangs. My jaw dropped. That is not what I'm taking about.

"N-no, Natsu. That's now what I-" I immediately replied when he suddenly jolted at my touch and went away.

"Let's go, Happy!" Happy was startled as h e gave me one last glistening glance before following him.

My heart broke and I felt cold. What have I done? Did I make a mistake? When did it have come to this?

All I want is for him to be happy. To give him freedom in fighting without worrying too much for me. To soar high in his capabilities without minding my rent fee. To spend time with Lisanna for the past's sake. To continue their friendship and bond without me meddling in between. I want him to have a rest from my nagging. To experience again more adventures with the comrade he dearly hold on to. And happy to be with the first person he snuggled with. The first friend and almost family like her mom, at least, that was how they told me.

What did I do? I touched my tears that spilled right after they left. I said we can still be friends, go on adventures but ...

I don't want to be abandoned. I don't want to lose them. I cried, I love Natsu and being with him made me the happiest. But I cannot take away the fulfilment he might have with Lisanna.

I have so many questions. I felt so bad. I don't understand. I suddenly felt the numbness and my eyes hazy. I felt so tired, my limbs falling to my bed. I managed to reach it and curled myself to sleep.

I'm tired and breaking. I don't want to think. I - I will make things right tomorrow.

Please tell me what I've done wrong.

Meanwhile, after hours of sleeping, she felt warm arms snaking around her, squeezing her tight with a whimper and a feline nuzzling her thighs. She did not move around and stayed like that, half asleep. The safety she sensed only comes from one person she knows.

"You're the only one I want to be with, Lucy ... forever."

A tear dropped from her eyes, and from there, she got all her answers.