Chapter 52

The conversation between Light and I had come to a standstill as he hovered over me, suggesting ways to rearrange the hints so that they would make sense. But it seems the only thing we were accomplishing is… I felt my world give a sudden throb as it came in and out of focus. The burning sensation I have been fighting in my throat intensifies. My fingers suddenly let go of my pad so it fell to the table with a clatter as I press them against my throat. Struggling to breathe. is going on with me?! I scream at myself in my head as I force sharp painful breaths. "Alessia... Are you okay?" I heard Light's voice as if he was much farther than right next to me. I nearly tried to speak before I managed to stop myself. Even if I was willing to put this charade to an end and talk, from the feeling of my throat... I doubt I would manage more than a syllable or two.

It was then I felt a hand on my forehead as another one rests on the opposite shoulder from where he was standing. It felt like someone had just poured gasoline on the fire and it was now burning out of control. My vision darkens before clearing back up and repeating the process. "You're… Burning up!" I could hear Light exclaim before I suddenly shoved my chair back. I have to get out of here! I yelled at myself in my head. If I don't… I will become a killer again! Light went to catch me as my legs tried to give out but somehow I managed to shove him off and run towards my door. " ! Wait!" He yells, he could be following me but I didn't care. I fumbled with the locks on the door before throwing it open and bolting out of the room as quickly as I could. Still clutching hold of my throat as if it was the only thing keeping me sane. Running... Feeling the chilly breeze in my hair... It soothed the burn just a little bit. Finding myself in an alleyway, I close my eyes to slump against a wall. Keep breathing, get yourself under control. I repeatedly told myself in my head as I slid down to the dank alley floor. My legs no longer holding me upright.

Even in the cool night, I felt sweat rolling from me. Radiating through my body with a furious heat. Looking up to the sky I began silently begging for this to end. The end of the pain, the end of my lapses in time, the end of my struggles. Why didn't losing that death note kill me? It could have, and right now... How I wish it had. Closing my eyes again as rain begins to fall over me almost like whoever I had just been begging was trying to cool me off. Trying to end the burning heat. Trying to bring back my sanity. As soon as that thought passed through my mind my throat gave an excruciating throb as if to contradict my hopes. I could feel myself plummeting into darkness. An Insanity ruled by pain.

*

As I lay there on the cement I just let the rainfall on my face. The sun has set making the sky and clouds mix into one large canvas of black. The pain in my throat finally coming to a dull roar, my body feeling heavy and weak. Is this what death feels like? I silently ask myself. The last moments being as if the world around you is in slow motion. As the searing pain, you had been feeling melts away. You can't do anything even if you actually wanted to. So you just continue laying in place awaiting the end as if you are patiently waiting for a car to come to a stop, or even patiently waiting in line for something to eat or drink? Waiting for your next turn at the counter. Closing my eyes I manage a shallow breath, wondering what will happen first. Will my heart stop or will my lungs cease to function, ending in my suffocating.

I barely heard footsteps scuff against the alley floor next to me. Though the hands that scooped me into arms only successfully caused the pain to ignite in all its fury once again. I felt my body lift from the alley floor as I was rolled against a chest. Covered in an unfamiliar scent. Opening my eyes I look up towards whoever had picked me up and seen a man who looked tired. As if his long life has been filled with nothing but stress. I could barely make out his facial expression before my world became coated in a deep crimson red. Reaching up I grab a hold of his coat being guided by my own insanity.

*Light*

I had searched for her after she had runoff. I even checked the hospitals to see if anyone fitting her description had been brought in. All of them came up empty. Why didn't she just stick around so I could help her? Why did she take off like that? Night had fallen hours ago by the time I reach my apartment where the rest of the task force should already be converging or by this time already there. Pulling out my phone once I step inside I look to see if I had missed any texts to respond to the ones I had sent her in my search for her. Unlike earlier, there was no response. "Where could she be?" I question as I try to send another text to her. Asking her to please text me back as soon as she can. Though I had a feeling, from what she ran out in… She doesn't have her phone on her.

"Light" I heard my Dad's voice causing me to look up. He was just on his way down the stairs. Probably to see who had come in. Looking back down I remove my shoes, soaked from the rain before finally stepping completely into my apartment. "We've been wondering where you are. Why are you late?" He questions bringing my gaze back upon his form as he takes in my disheveled appearance.

"Alessia had invited me to her hotel room so I could give her the updates on the case. She didn't look like she was feeling well but she was insistent about focusing on the case. I was there with her until she broke out in a cold sweat. She seemed like she was having a hard time breathing but when I tried to help her… She ran out of the hotel." I inform him as I walk in the direction of my bedroom to change out of my wet clothes. "I have been searching for her since."

"Have you checked the hospitals and local businesses?" He asks standing outside my door as I change.

"Yes, the only other solution I can think of is putting an APB out on her." I mention tugging on my brown sweater before opening the door to face my dad.

"We should wait. It has only been a few hours. She may turn up yet." Nodding to him I walk from my room towards the room we hold as our headquarters. She can't be labeled as a missing person until forty-eight hours after the fact. Plus with her running out and being at least the age of eighteen it would add in as a factor that would lead the cops around to not place her as a priority. There is nothing we can do for now.

*S*

Raising my right arm I cover my eyes to block the disturbing sunlight. I just want to sleep a little longer but it seems the sun didn't want me to. Slowly moving my arm as I yawn I try to get my eyes used to the newfound light. Before rolling over and looking towards my curtain-covered window. "What happened last night?" I ask myself before finally pushing myself up and walking into the bathroom. After turning on my shower I turn around to face the mirror. My eyes widening at what I saw. Running over to the sink vanity I rub my eyes just to make sure I wasn't seeing things.

I was covered from head to toe in blood. It was matted in my hair, staining my shirt, smeared across my face and my arms. Looking down I see my pajama shorts sticking to me stained red, even my legs. I looked as if I had some fun rolling around in red paint. "No, no, no, no" I felt my eyes watering as I try to come to terms with what I may have done. Did I push myself too far between feedings? Was my hunger growing? What the hell?! Turning around I jump into the shower clothes and all before I began scrubbing my skin and hair like there was no tomorrow. Scrubbing hard enough I leave scratch marks from my nails against my skin.

*

As I tug on my new outfit I look down at myself. Today I was wearing my blue spaghetti string tank top with my lightweight blue jean jacket and light blue hip-hugging jeans. My skin was still blotchy from how hard I had scrubbed. As around my eyes were red from the silent tears I had cried in the shower. Grabbing my makeup bag I was just about to walk into the bathroom when a knock rapt against my hotel room door. Walking over to it I felt a lump in my throat as my heart began to rapidly hammer against my chest. If it's Lucien… I don't know what I'll do. He would never forgive me if I actually killed someone. Shaking my head I close my eyes balling up my fists. There is no if. From how much blood I had on me one if not more people were dead because of me.

Standing up on my tiptoes I peek through the peephole in the door. Holding my breath as another knock sounded this time. Harder and more persistent. Letting myself exhale seeing the light brown well-kept hair I take a step back and open the door. Now realizing I hadn't locked them when I got in sometime last night. As the door creaked open I peered through the crack at him. Though instead of him staying put after the brief flow of relief I could catch on his expression. He shoved his way into the hotel room without me even inviting him in. Okay, now that's rude! I mentally shout at him as I sturdy myself before shutting the door behind him.

I was just about to turn around and glare at him while silently cursing him out when I felt his hands on my shoulders seconds before being spun and my back being shoved against the door. Hard enough I felt the air escape my lungs. He held me in place even as I sucked in a breath to capture newfound air so that I could glare up at him. When I did, the look in his eyes nearly made the air escape from me again. I saw pain billowing in his eyes as he stares down at me. Why is he hurting so much? Why is the pain in his eyes echoing within me? Just when I was about to shove him away so I could go get my pad to talk to him I watched his eyes begin to rake over me. Almost as if he was double-checking that I was okay. Either that or trying to see if there was something weird about me.

"Alessia…" He finally spoke. His voice was no louder than a whisper before he suddenly yanks me from the door and wraps his arms around me… protectively. "I thought... I thought something had happened to you. You looked ill yesterday and even began fighting for breath with a fever before you bolted out… I thought…I thought when I couldn't find you at any of the hospitals that you had gotten hurt or worse." His words vibrate through his chest against my ear. I find my eyes widening. Why would he go so far as to search for me? Why is he even hugging me?!

Pulling from him I step out of his arms. For some reason this caused a newfound pain in my chest doing so. Walking around him towards my table to pick up my pad that was still resting where I had dropped it. What is going on with me? Last night, this morning even was weird enough. Now the prime suspect that I have been trying to get under his skin and make him leave evidence behind is hugging me! What sort of an alternate reality did I wake up in?! Pushing my emotions down so I could still seem calm I turn around to face him before typing him my message.

-Sorry about yesterday... I needed some air.-

"What's going on Alessia, you can tell me anything." I gave him a skeptical look before he rubs the back of his head glancing down at the floor. "Do you have an illness?" He questions causing me to furrow my brow before looking back down at my pad.

-I've had a bad cold lately, I went to the doctor the other night which is why I wasn't at task force headquarters. I guess It got really bad last night but, don't worry I feel fine today.- Why is lying becoming so easy for me to do anymore? He gives me a nod before setting down on the edge of my bed with a heavy sigh.

"When I saw the news, I was scared for some reason that you were one of those found dead last night." I felt my eyes widen briefly before I could catch them and get them under control. It sure was a good thing he wasn't looking at me at that exact moment.

-Nope, safe and sound.- I message before setting down at the table. Brushing my still damp hair from my face I type again. -Murders? You mean Kira?-

"No, someone else. It's completely unrelated to the case we are working on. The police are figuring occult killings from the way they all died. Completely drained of blood." He says catching my attention again. Occult? No, far from it.

-Anything else about their deaths that stand out?- I decide to ask. He just chuckles and shakes his head.

"Thinking about working on two cases at once Alessia?" I felt my cheeks go red before glancing away from him.

-Maybe-