A/N: Have I mentioned how much I just adore writing Levi? Literally the most fun I've had with a character in ages, and it's breathing new life into some of my other professional writing, so I am eternally grateful for that.
This chapter is quite short, taking place during the journey to go plug Wall Maria. Don't worry, the next one more than makes up for it. ;)
Disclaimer: I do not own AOT/SNK or any of the characters used in this fic.
CHAPTER 6: STILL SOLDIERS
When Mikasa woke up after the coronation, Levi was gone.
A part of her wondered if her blurry memory of Levi coming back, of his arm curled around her, tucking her into his chest, had all been a dream. But then she saw her scarf on his pillow, neatly folded with a note scrawled in Levi's messy handwriting. I told you I'd give it back.
She pressed the note into her chest with trembling fingers then folded it into her pocket on some silly, sentimental urge she couldn't shake.
That had been four days ago, and a lot had happened in that time in all aspects of life except between her and Levi.
"We're going to plug up Wall Maria. Tomorrow," Erwin announced to the ever-dwindling Scout Regiment. A few new faces cluttered the ranks, none of them looking particularly thrilled to be there, Mikasa noted. Except for Marlo Freudenberg, the former MP who had shocked Mikasa when he made good on his promise to join the Scouts once the dust had settled.
"So soon?" Armin yelped. "We barely enough troops to manage a full formation as it is, and half of them are emergency recruits that don't have any Scout training yet."
"The situation certainly is not ideal," Erwin's deep voice purred over the crowd, "but it's what we must do. It's the last step in securing the peoples' faith in us. We revealed their corrupt government, found their rightful queen. Now it is up to us to reclaim their lands! And we finally have the means by which to do it." His eyes slid to Eren, looking nervous at Mikasa's side. She could practically hear his inner monologue of self-doubt and reached over to give his hand a squeeze.
"Stop doubting yourself, Eren," Mikasa muttered so that only Eren and Armin could hear. "You saved all of us by hardening. You can do this."
He gave her a small smile. "Thanks, Mikasa."
Mikasa raised her gaze to the commander but caught Levi's instead. He glanced away briefly, embarrassed she had caught him staring, but looked back to find she was now the one staring at him. Something like a grin tugged at the corner of his lips, but to any not looking for it, it would have just looked like Levi was getting bored.
That was the most interaction they'd had since that night, and now, they were marching straight for Hell's gate. They had left at dawn and rode hard for the forest just inside the wall of Shinganshina. The same forest Eren and Mikasa had come to gather firewood countless times as children. She remembered chasing Eren through the trees, playing hide and go seek, following his cries when he managed to get a little too lost.
Now, under the starless, moonless sky, any fond memory of the place seemed buried beneath the ages.
Levi's voice behind her broke her from her reverie. "Ackerman, fall back. I want a word with you."
Eren, who had been walking his horse beside her for what felt like hours now, looked at her. "What's that about, ya think?"
"Probably just wants to warn me about losing my head if you're in danger," she said, abruptly turning so they couldn't see the blush creeping across her face.
"Yes, Captain?"
Levi cleared his throat. "H–How are you doing?"
What a strange question for him to ask. "…fine, I guess? I mean, we're marching to what's probably a death trap set by Reiner and Berthold, but other than that, just hunky-dory."
"No, that's not–not what I meant. I was more referring to–," Levi huffed a sigh and ran a frustrated hand through his black mop. He was cute when he was flustered. She made a mental note to get him there more often. "I meant about the other night. There hasn't been any time to talk, and I just want to make sure you're…alright…with what happened."
"If you're asking if I regret anything, then no," she answered matter-of-factly.
Even in the dark, she thought she saw a smile split his face. "Good. Because I need you focused right now."
"You need me focused? It doesn't seem like I'm the one not focused on the mission, Captain," she said cheekily.
He exhaled a puff of laughter. "Damn brat." Mikasa suddenly felt his fingers brush hers, his index finger hooking around hers as if asking permission.
"Damn runt," she said in reply, opening her hand to let their fingers knit together. They walked in silence like this for a few minutes, almost forgetting where they were and what they were going to do. It was probably a bad idea, to be so bold as to hold hands in the company of the entire regiment. But the darkness made them bold, perhaps recklessly so.
Better to get it all out of our systems now, Mikasa thought, before the dawn and whatever Hell it brings.
Levi and Mikasa may have been humanity's strongest, but they were still humans. Humans who desperately needed the affection and touch of someone else… perhaps especially now and on the brink of what could be all of their gruesome ends.
"Titan! On the left!" A bouquet of lantern beams converged into the inky woods to Levi and Mikasa's left, illuminating a 10-15 meter titan leaning against a tree. Its tongue lolled out of its too-big mouth and its eyes, the only part of it able to move, carefully tracked the passing soldiers.
"Ugly bastard," Levi muttered.
"Aren't they all?" Mikasa asked, giving his hand a light squeeze.
Thank God for the moonless night, Levi thought, for more reasons than one. This bit of luck now would probably come back to bite them tenfold later, but he didn't care. They could use any bit of luck the cruel universe thought fit to grant them.
"Mikasa! Look!" Eren ran back toward them and the two quickly released hands, as if they had just realized they were touching something hot. "We made it! Look!" he pointed ahead at the towering walls, just barely visible in the loaming light of pre-dawn. "Home is just beyond there. Come on!" he grabbed her hand and tugged her back up in the ranks. She glanced back at Levi apologetically before his face was lost to the darkness.
Several minutes went by before Erwin rode up alongside Levi. "I guess this is it. This is where we lay it all on the line. If we fall, humanity will likely follow." Levi didn't reply. Erwin didn't need to tell him that. The commander's tone shifted, and he said softly, "I hope you know what you're doing."
Levi raised an eyebrow. "Killing titans? Yeah, I think we both know that I know what I'm doing in that department."
"That's not what I meant."
"What the hell are you talking about then?"
"Mikasa." Levi's blood turned to ice. That damn Commander. The bastard was too sharp for his own good.
"What about her?"
"I'm not going to scold you and remind you of the military's non-fraternization policy. I didn't do that in the past and I won't do it now. I just want to make sure you're not doing something you're going to regret later. As your friend," he added, gently. Levi swallowed uncomfortably. "Of course, as your commander, I'll add that I also hope you aren't doing anything that is going to compromise the performance of my two best soldiers."
Levi sighed. Denying it wouldn't matter, so he decided not saying anything was his best option.
"Don't mistake me, Levi. You deserve to be happy, and we both damn well know no Scout would ever have a chance at a relationship without someone outside the Regiment. But you know as well as I that Ackerman isn't just any Scout. She's one of our most strategic pieces, both by her own merit and her relationship with Jaeger. It's not like it was last time–"
"I know she's not Petra!" Levi snapped irritably. He didn't need this lecture right now. Regardless of his somewhat detached feelings toward her, he had let Petra die. He couldn't take that back, but what he could do is ensure the same did not happen to Mikasa.
"Just keep my words in mind," Ewin said, hopping on his horse and riding ahead.
As soon as the commander was out of earshot, Levi scoffed to himself, "Tch." Of course I don't know what I'm fucking doing.
But it didn't matter. Right now, only one thing mattered, and it was rising ominously in front of them by the second: Wall Maria.
This was it. If they plugged it, mankind will have won a great victory. If they failed…their deaths and everything they had done leading up to it, would be meaningless.
Yes, Levi and Mikasa were humans, but in the end, they were still soldiers, which meant their lives weren't their own.