This chapter is very much taking a breath. It's a brief respite, the bonfire before we go onto other things. These things are unlikely to be as heavy as last chapter, but let's be real guys, I think we all need this after last chapter. I sure as fuck did LOL! Anyway! I am here to once again introduce more OCs! And this time this comes with a:
HEADCANON! On the Twi'lek species: They grow up fast, because Ryloth is a very dangerous world - but they get to a certain point and their metabolisms just slow way down and they live for a loooong time. it's why you don't usually see a lot of older Twi'leks, and they all seem so young for so long! They just live a long time lol.
Another headcanon is very shortly revealed, I went with it because I a. could, b. thought it was wonderful. c. they made them roar and how could I not d. funnily lions and such cannot actually purr, which means that the Cathar are actually likely unable to make this sound properly, but obviously Zabraks are lesser cats, so LOL I'm dying, you guys, but it was too good, and also a very good way at showing that not everything...has been taken away.
I am nonetheless adding one warning: Talks of slavery, but nothing...too specific.
Plo did not want to let go.
It had been three months. Three months of almost complete and total shutdown. Of Orders and blank stares and no movement outside of what he was told. Maul smelled vaguely of sweat, his tunic covered in much the same – having last been ordered to go through a series of exercises before they had tried to talk to him again as Maul was always more aware after a session – but Plo could not care less.
The Council had been working together in rotation to talk to him, to try and get him to engage with Tiq's involvement, the Rodian having been working near tirelessly to try and get Maul to wake, to come back. He was vaguely aware of Tiq wiping tears from his eyes, having sagged into Eeth, who was also looking like he was deliberately trying to hold back tears.
But Plo closed his eyes and just held onto Maul, feeling the rhythm of two hearts against his chest, the strength in those limbs – which had been such a relief, to know that Maul would follow…and Plo's mind skittered away from the reality of those orders. He hated every single one of those orders, every single one that had fallen from their mouths, but they had been so needed, and to know that Maul had been able to exercise, had been able to keep up something he had obviously worked so hard for… It was good.
It was good.
Maul held onto him like his life depended on it, and there was a part of Plo that thought Maul really might feel like it did, and when that presence that had been so missed, (so truly and dearly missed) slowly began to unfurl… Plo felt Maul's signature, his being slowly come back.
Maul no longer felt like nothing, no longer felt as though he was empty space.
And Plo was glad he could give this to him.
Plo was also aware that Eeth and Tiq were not the only ones that were crying. He was mildly grateful that Maul could not feel the liquid that was very obviously dripping onto his shoulder due to the tunic he was wearing, and the fact that his horns meant he had to tilt his head away.
Plo was very much an emotional wreck right now, and he would meditate later, but for right now he was going to enjoy this.
Maul was sagging against him, and Plo looked to Tiq, a brief burst of worry choking him at the feeling, for one moment worried that he was… Tiq wiped his eyes and flashed a few signs, 'exhaustion likely, sleep good.' And then, with another bubble of tears 'safe.'
Plo tilted his head very far back and did his best not to sob.
Plo shifted his grip so he was supporting Maul more, doing it slowly as Maul's own grip slackened, as he leaned his head more and more into Plo's shoulder, his horns poking safely over the top. And then…
Plo didn't know what it was at first, broken and stilted, stuttering and starting and…
Eeth clapped his hand to his mouth suddenly, and was very obviously crying now, leaning against Tiq, who leaned against him, and then the Zabrak put a hand carefully to that spot beneath the hollow of his throat, against the organ that…
Plo was going to weep.
Plo was going to weep it was too late for him, it was too late.
Maul was…
It was…
Maul was purring.
Worn and broken and weak as it was, Maul was purring.
His Master hadn't taken that from him.
And Plo was going to weep as soon as he got a free moment…
But for right now, Plo held him carefully, letting Maul slump against him more and more, feeling that presence dip, the breath against his shoulder slow and deepen. Finally, Maul slumped fully against him, his grip falling lax, and his head pressing deeper into his shoulder as he finally fell into sleep.
Plo closed his eyes, holding back the tears, because this was true sleep, healing sleep, none of that terrible awful half-sleep that Maul had been doing before that was so terrible to see, so empty and so hollow. Plo lifted him easily, with Force and his own strength, curling Maul against his chest and taking him to the bunk that… There was a part of Plo that did not want to put Maul back in that bunk. Maul had lain there so still and so utterly empty for so long…
But Maul did not feel empty.
Maul felt as though he was there, was with them, was living, and as Tiq pulled the blanket back, Plo was comfortable and happy with lowering Maul into it, curling him gently into his favored position, and watching as Maul did something he never had while Maul was trapped in his own mind.
Maul snuggled back, pressing his back closer against the wall, and while a part of Plo was a bit shattered to see it (Maul was even now working to protect himself), the rest of him was so relieved he nearly sank to the ground.
Maul was still with them.
Tiq carefully pulled the blanket back up so it was under Maul's chin, watching as Maul huffed and slowly worked on squirming so he was buried beneath it, his horns the only thing poking out.
Plo was going to have a heart attack and die. But for right now… For right now, Plo just wanted to take a moment to breathe, to recognize that Maul was back with them and not locked away deep inside his own mind.
Maul had asked for help.
Maul had come back to them.
Maul had made a choice.
Maul had taken that first terrifying step into the unknown and…
And had trusted Plo to catch him.
Plo's hands slowly flexed, remembering what it was to hold that form, to catch him, and swore to continue catching him for as long as he could, as long as he needed.
Plo backed away slowly, looking to Tiq, who wiped his eyes and nodded, backing away himself and turning to look to Mace and Yoda, who were wiping their own eyes. Tiq signed that it was okay for them to leave and they exited, finding the Guards adjusting their masks, straightening suddenly, and looking straight ahead. Plo hid the smile that wanted to crinkle at his still watering eyes.
The Council had not been the only ones that worried.
They slowly left, the transparisteel closing, and Tiq took several deep breaths, before reaching out, carefully putting hands on each of them, "Thank you. Thank you very much for being there with me. Thank you for helping."
Plo took one of those hands, feeling the slight tremble and squeezing.
"Thank you, Healer," he said, "very much."
"Without your guidance we would not have known what to do," Eeth agreed.
"Trapped, Maul would be," Yoda shook his head. "Grateful we are for your hard work and perseverance."
"If you would like a vacation you can have it," Mace finished.
There was a round of agreement, the Guards included, and Tiq laughed.
"Absolutely not," he said, shaking his head. "This is just the first…it's the first steps and these are…these are absolutely the most crucial. And besides, to know… I am just so glad he is here." Tiq took a breath, his hands coming up to his large, closed eyes. "We need to…we need to decide some things before we walk him through this," he said finally, looking up at them all. "He will be asleep for a while yet. Such a thing is exhausting, and to have lasted so long…I don't doubt that Maul will sleep for a day. I would not be surprised if he sleeps for two, frankly, his body needs it."
"Should…" one of the Guards spoke then and they immediately turned to her. "Beg your pardon," she said with a bow, "I merely…I wondered if we should wake him to check if he is truly aware. He sleeps very still, Masters."
Tiq smiled at her, the look warm. "I assure you; you will be able to feel if he winks out. There is a possibility of this, but I do not doubt that it will be much easier to bring him back. Maul wants to come back, and that is enough." Tiq's smile turned into a grin and he sent a brief glance towards that body still hiding beneath the covers before turning back to the Guards. "Please do not wake him until he is ready, and he wakes up on his own. It will give his body and mind more time to process." Tiq's smile slowly shifted and turned into a frown. "And now…I believe we need to discuss something else. We need to discuss that collar."
There was a pause, the Council Members looking at each other before back to Tiq.
"Frankly, I would have liked to have taken it off during his fugue, but the fact remains that if he had come out of it violently or had been startled, I do fear he would have reacted…poorly. He could have hurt himself and others severely if he still had access to the Force, so it was a necessary evil. But now that Maul has directly asked for help, now that he has come to us… We need to begin showing him trust. I would like to remove the collar permanently but… There are other factors to consider. I'm sure you know what they are." Tiq frowned heavily at all of them, making direct eye contact with those large eyes that saw too much. "Either way, I submit that we remove that dreadful thing when he is within his cell. I also recommend getting him out of the cell and into a training room or the gardens or somewhere. His mind needs the extra stimulation, and it would be good for him. More than good, at this point it is necessary, and we need to make a schedule of it. We need to get him out, we need to get him used to things, and us used to him."
"Agreed," Plo said, his rebreather making the sound heavy. "I believe he can be trusted to not cause harm to any of us, and I believe it would be so much healthier for him to be in connection with the Force, to be able to Meditate when he needs, to be able to have that part of himself back." But even so, there was a concern. Plo took a breath, "do you trust that you will be safe?" he asked, turning to look to the Guards.
The Guards who had lost so many of their number. The Guards who had lost two at Maul's hands, and so many more at his Master's.
The Guards immediately saluted in a way that spoke of long discussion with themselves and the others amongst them. They would not have made the movement otherwise, would not have given their blessing.
Plo felt his heart warm. He took a breath, looking to the other Members of the Council.
"I'd take it off now if I wasn't afraid it would wake him," Eeth said without pause once they knew the Guards were with them, his gaze hard.
"Agreed I am, with this plan of action," Yoda said with a firm nod. "To meditate he should be allowed, known to us, his signature should be. Freedoms we must begin to give."
Mace inclined his head. "I, too, agree with this plan. Do you have a recommendation for where we should give him access to first?"
"…Maul would probably love a chance to get in one of our training rooms," Eeth said with a raised eyebrow.
Tiq beamed, and immediately nodded, "Agreed. He had a growth spurt before his mind was cut into, and he hasn't had an opportunity to really get used to his new height, not properly at least. I do not think he was actively moving much after it happened."
"He was not," the other Guard said, her voice firm. There was something loaded in that statement, and Plo had to guess another bet. He hid his smile, though it slid. To go through so much in such a short period…
It was alright.
Maul would be alright.
They were walking.
One foot in front of the other.
They were walking.
Anakin felt the presence slowly unfurling in the back of his mind while he was in the middle of meditation with Teacher Qui-Gon. For just one moment he did not know what it was, and then his eyes snapped open.
Maul.
Maul was back.
Maul was here, he was present, he was!
Anakin bolted upright, nearly vibrating with delight.
It had been three months. Three months where Anakin had worked so hard on occupying himself, on keeping himself from thinking about that still figure in the prison cell who didn't react to anything, who could be pushed into a specific position and didn't care enough to move out of it, even when it had to hurt.
Three months where Maul had taken Orders.
Anakin had been devastated at the sight of Maul eating the soup after he had…after he had ordered him. After Anakin had let his temper get the best of him and yelled at… The soup was not something that people were meant to be ordered to take. The soup was meant to be eaten of their own free will, and Anakin had not care, he had not cared, he had gotten so angry and he had yelled…
It had scared him. It had scared him, and it had hurt, and he found himself going to Qui-Gon to talk about the anger that coiled in his chest like a krayt dragon and threatened to erupt all the time, the anger he could not shove down deep enough. That was also when Qui-Gon began realizing how…difficult so much of the Jedi philosophy was and that Anakin wasn't so much letting go of his emotions as he was suppressing them. It had…it had been a very hard conversation, but Anakin was feeling so much lighter, so much more…relieved now that it had taken place. Now that he could move.
There was a disconnect that they hadn't realized was there until Anakin had spoken and now that they knew…it was…it was beginning to make sense. Anakin was slowly able to let that anger go, going to frequent therapy sessions with a temporary Mind Healer named Soon, who was Tiq's second and a Nautolan female who smiled freely and laughed quicker than anyone he knew. Anakin liked her a lot and she had been a big help. He did miss Tiq a bit, but Soon had been very helpful, and he knew that Tiq had to work with someone much more difficult.
Either way, as he practically vibrated his way out of his skin, Anakin found that the past three months were beginning to wash away, instead surrounded with bright warm delight, because:
"Maul's awake!" Anakin cried out, "he's here! He's here, Teacher, he's here! He's alive! He's here!"
Qui-Gon opened his eyes and smiled, watching him in that serene but warm way of his that Anakin was slowly beginning to understand. Obi-Wan had been right when he said that training with Qui-Gon was sometimes a bit strange, but Anakin liked it.
He also really wanted to go to Maul.
"Can we see him? Can we…please, please! I know that we have to meditate, and I will, but…"
"Hold on, Anakin," Qui-Gon said softly, and Anakin settled. "Feel again, what does that signature feel like it's doing…"
Anakin closed his eyes and reached out again, feeling as that signature dimmed slowly, gently, and then settled at a… "He's sleeping," Anakin said, opening his eyes and blinking in slight surprise. He hadn't expected that. He had thought that once Maul would be up, he would be up. Maul seemed to operate on that level most of the time, an almost fever-pitched intensity that drove him through most of his actions.
"I spoke to Healer Tiq about what was likely to happen when Maul came out of his fugue," Qui-Gon said, "apparently the body in that state cannot properly rest, and Maul has been in a sort of…half-awake state this entire time, where even sleep was not true sleep. His body and mind are both exhausted and he needs that rest in order to begin to heal. It may last two days, it may be more, it may be less, it is up to Maul."
Anakin took this in for a moment before giving out a soft sigh, feeling that slow rising melancholia come up to meet him.
"Come here, please? Qui-Gon requested softly, his hand outstretched, and Anakin walked forward, taking it. "Maul will be fine. He has gone through so much, you, yourself understand this, but he has finally come out of it. We will be able to talk to him, soon."
Anakin smiled, a slow thing that broadened, and Qui-Gon smiled back.
There was a knock on the door then, Qui-Gon calling for it to open and Obi-Wan stuck his head in, his eyes wide, "Did you feel that?"
"Maul's awake, Obi-Wan!" Anakin cried out and ran over to the other Jedi, who laughed aloud at his enthusiasm, but Anakin couldn't care, not yet, and he could tell that they didn't either.
"Of course, he is," Obi-Wan agreed, grabbing his hands as he offered them. "I did tell you he would awaken, and you know why?"
"Because he's too stubborn," Anakin beamed, "and Healer Tiq's too good at his job, and we all worked really hard with him…" Anakin took a breath, "And most importantly because Maul decided to."
"Yes," Obi-Wan smiled at him, "he did. We'll have to congratulate him when we see him. In two days, do you think?"
"We probably should not crowd him all at once," Qui-Gon cautioned. "That was the other thing that Tiq suggested. But as soon as Tiq says that Maul is able to have visitors, we will absolutely be there."
Anakin beamed, took a breath, and slowly let it out, practicing in the way Healer Soon had recommended. It was one of the things that were going to help prepare him to let out those twisting emotions within him, that got him familiar with the motion.
As it was, it was another thing that he was working on, as well as learning how to properly verbally spar with the other Jedi Padawans.
Anakin had struggled with it from the beginning, and now that he had been chosen as a Padawan and was getting deeper and deeper into his studies, he had found that the other Padawans had a tendency to be… Healer Soon called them jealous, Healer Tiq had called them stupid and said that they'd grow out of it. But the knowledge that Anakin had been a slave had spread and…and this was probably half of the reason for his anger, but…
Anakin had also managed to gain friends.
The ones that worked with him in the kitchens, and a lot of them were carnivores that were bigger than he was – Togrutas and Zabraks and Nosaurians and more. They had befriended Anakin, laughing at the small omnivore human that didn't have the proper teeth to eat half of the stuff he helped cook, and certainly couldn't eat the things that weren't, but wanted to help anyway. That had been the start of their slow and steady warm up to him.
The knowledge that Anakin was bad at cooking was another.
Anakin wasn't really…bad, he thought, he just had a tendency to get distracted. And he had burned one or two items…several times…in a single session. But it wasn't his fault, really. There was so much going on and it was all so interesting. They laughed and they accepted that, and it had…made them warm to him. Anakin remembered Soon's talk of jealousy and thought that the idea that they were able to see that Anakin was not all perfect was something they had needed.
Anakin was glad, even if he thought it was stupid.
And one of the Zabraks, a sharp-tongued girl named Til Soo had probably saved Anakin from breaking his knuckles on an older boy's face.
Anakin still thought back to it with a kind of dizzying relief. They'd been working on lightsaber drills, and Anakin had been training so hard, and had gotten so good at letting the Force guide his movements… Anakin was a natural, and he knew it, and all of his classmates knew it.
It wasn't fair.
Anakin still didn't even know their names. All he knew is in one moment he had demonstrated a complicated maneuver that had taken his other classmates months to perfect… And the next moment one of the older boys had turned and hissed to his friend, "He may be good with a lightsaber but that doesn't mean he'd make a good Jedi."
"No," his friend had agreed, laughing, "after all, he's just a slave to his emotions, it's obvious."
"Just a slave…" the first boy had agreed, and Anakin had seen red.
In that moment he had wanted to turn, wanted to throw that training saber away and beat them both black and blue, and then Til, her voice sweet as honey and sharp as a vibroblade quietly hissed,
"And you both are Slaves to your Jealousy."
Anakin's heart had leapt.
"If either of you ever hope to be good Jedi, you should look at how you treat the people around you and the things you say. Is this really how you treat people when they get out of a terrible situation are able to thrive – with jealousy and pettiness? And you want to call yourselves Jedi."
Til had stopped her soft hissing, her gaze sharp and pointed, and the two boys had backed down, both of them flushing and looking away from her gaze. They did not apologize to Anakin, but he almost didn't care in the rush of gratitude to Til. Til had just winked at him, and slowly began his quiet lessons on how to properly verbally repost a Jedi.
It was…enlightening, and frankly a lot of fun, and gave Anakin a better defense than he had before. It was…good.
Anakin was happy.
Anakin had friends, was learning so much more in a way that made sense, and Maul was awake.
It was forward motion. Anakin was walking.
One step at a time, Anakin was walking.
He had chosen a path and he was going to stick to it.
As much as Tiq wanted to say that he didn't need a vacation and everything was okay, he asked the guards to alert him to when Maul woke up, made sure that the Council was in complete agreement with his proposed plan to remove the collar, and then went into his quarters and slept for an entire day.
The next day he found Healer Soon, his Nautolan colleague, sitting down before him with a cup of tea and an expectant look, handing one off to Tiq.
"Heard you had a breakthrough," she grinned, and Tiq laughed.
"He did," Tiq agreed. "I'm so excited, Soon," he said, rubbing his face. "I slept for a day, it's been utterly exhausting, but I'm excited."
"Want to talk about it?" Soon asked, grinning, and Tiq laughed, before doing just that.
When he had poured everything out, he took a deep breath and took a sip of now cold tea.
"I'm worried," he said finally, his voice soft. "It's going to be a hard road, and it's one that he's moving down, but…well. There's a lot of groundwork that we have to work on. We stripped his entire foundation, and we have to help him build anew. I think he can do it. I believe he must have clung to something, but…"
"It's a lot of work," Soon agreed. "But," she smiled, "the good thing is we can do the work. The good thing is that he has asked us to help him. He wants to learn how to do something other than hurt."
Tiq beamed at her and took her hand, squeezing. "Thank you, you're right."
"Of course, I am," Soon answered smugly, her tendrils wiggling in amusement, and Tiq laughed.
"Onto other things then, did you wish to talk about Anakin?"
"He's doing wonderfully!" Soon beamed. "It took a while, but you know how we learned he was internalizing instead of releasing?"
"I do," Tiq agreed.
"We are now working on helping him learn what we mean by release, because he just wasn't understanding the concept. It's a slower process, of course, but he's already doing so much better."
"That's delightful," Tiq sighed, "has he made any friends?"
"You'll have to talk to him yourself," Soon laughed, "I'm not telling."
Tiq put a hand to his chest and groaned as though he had been mortally wounded and Soon laughed aloud.
"Stop being dramatic," she scolded, swatting his knee. "How are you feeling?"
Tiq took a breath and sighed. "Much better," he said. "Thank you."
"Of course," Soon smiled. "I'm doing well as well, thank you for asking~" The smile turned blinding and Tiq laughed aloud.
They had a path.
It was time to walk along it.
Alema Rol had been a Guard for a long time.
Before that she had been the trainer of three Padawans, two girls and a boy, all of whom had grown up to be strong and powerful with the Force, all of whom she had loved dearly.
Alema had lived for a long time…had seen much and done much but staying detached from the young man that had been in the cell behind her was potentially the hardest and the only one she was willing – and frankly at this point happy - to fail. Attachments when one stood as a Guard were generally more forbidden than they were among the rest – as they had to be willing to save their people even from themselves – and so there was always that distance, there was always the knowledge that Maul was a killer that would destroy and had destroyed… But to view him wholly without compassion, without the burning need to teach…this…this was frankly beyond even her.
Alema did not know how they were meant to remain impartial to the one they held in their walls, not when he was so demonstrative of not only a pain that had plagued her own people for generations, and certainly not when he was trying so hard.
Alema had been there when Maul had finally reached out, when he had brought his hands up in the only way that he knew how, grabbing hold of Plo with no intention of violence, but completely unable to think of another method of stopping him. Completely unable to think of another method outside of death and pain, the only two constants that the young life in the cell behind her had ever known.
Alema had listened to that broken stilted purr and had been unable to stop the tears from rising, going directly to her current pair Liana Mun after her shift and pouring the entire thing out, watching as Liana wept as well.
Liana was like her in that she had also been around – pushing seventy and having raised two Padawans to adulthood and to life, a boy and a girl. Her human lifespan was much less than her own Twi'lek one, but it was nonetheless full of much the same as hers. And she had also been trapped in the pull of rooting for the slave in their midst – the slave that was finally taking steps to be free.
Alema was proud. More than proud, she was relieved, and she rejoiced in those steps often, both alone and with the woman beside her.
Slavery was one of the most disgusting blights upon the Galaxy, and one that had torn up her own planet for long enough, and…torn up Maul's own. A Nightbrother, a born slave, and there was a disgusting irony in that, in the idea of escaping one form of slavery and winding up in another… It was not an unexpected plight for the offshoot of the Zabrak species, as she knew that the members of that race were often considered as, or perhaps even more exotic than the Twi'lek females, and perhaps for obvious reasons given their rarity.
And the fact that if Maul was a common example of his race, she understood where they would get their appeal, able to appraise it with the critical and ultimately impersonal eye that she could look at her own people with.
And if there was one thing that Alema thought that she could hate – it was the slavery that bound them both.
But Alema was a Jedi and so she did not hate, and instead focused upon the path that they had suddenly found themselves standing before – the one that would lead to life. The one that may end with a Sith in their midst, reformed, renounced, or perhaps even redeemed, ultimately Maul was going to be free, and potentially even amongst them.
And maybe, and Alema didn't dwell on this much because it seemed like too much of a dream, but there was the possibility that Maul would let them train him. Would attempt to stand as a Padawan of their Order.
But for now, she would wait, and she would watch, every so often sending glances at the still form lying upon that bed where he had been for close to two days now.
It was during one of these glances that the quiet bonds of sleep slowly began releasing him, and she found her gaze slitting towards Liana's, knowing without seeing that she was meeting her own.
Maul was waking up.
Maul shifted, stretching out underneath the covers, moving from his curled-up position with his back against the wall and slowly rolled out of the bed to land in a pushup position.
It was such a normal, completely ordinary sight that Alema felt tears welling in her eyes.
"Three minutes," Liana's voice rang through her mask, and Alema laughed aloud, the sound warm and bright and utterly relieved.
It also made her open her comm, immediately calling Tiq.
"Maul is awake," she said, answering a question he already knew the answer to. "Would you recommend giving him a moment to orient himself, or should we call Plo here now as well as yourself?"
"He is moving to orient himself?" Tiq asked.
"He's doing pushups."
Tiq laughed, the sound relieved and as delighted as she herself felt. "I am glad. Allow him his exercise, and to get a shower, Plo and I will arrive with breakfast in…how long would you say?"
Alema side-eyed Liana, "Four minutes for pushups, and he's likely going to run through a bit of a routine to wake his body up…perhaps…should I advise him to feel free to take a long shower?"
"Yes," Tiq agreed. "I think that that is a wise decision. He may not think to do it himself, and it is good to let him know that he can."
"Thank you, Tiq, then perhaps…forty minutes in order to give him time to stretch afterwards."
"I agree with that. If he is ready before then simply let us know, or indeed, if he takes longer, we will bring breakfast either way."
"Very good, Healer," Alema said.
"We're both going to be wrong," Liana said as soon as she hung up, laughter in the sound. "I want to revise mine to six."
"Cheating," Alema said, sniffing, and Liana laughed aloud.
They watched as Maul worked his way through pushups, before rolling onto his back to do sit-ups, adding in the usual one-two punch that he always threw in.
"My bet," Alema beamed and Liana huffed.
"Quiet, you," she hissed, and Alema laughed this time, before with a hum,
"Five minutes."
"Seven!"
"You think?" Alema challenged, "you don't want to revise it this time?"
"Shut up," Liana retorted and Alema beamed.
Maul made it for ten.
"Think he noticed something he didn't like? That's a bit longer than usual…"
"He hasn't been…in control…" Alema said softly and heard Liana's soft sigh, one that she concurred with. "It's possible he's working on accounting for a loss. I don't think he was able to spend a lot of time on his core…"
"If you're right he should roll into a…"
"Plank."
"There it is."
"Seven."
"No bet."
Maul went for seven before shifting into position for squats, which lasted five minutes, before he fell into a rough stretching sequence, and finally turned his attention towards the refresher, but before he could, Alema placed the water bottle they had for him in the slot, pressing the button that allowed Maul to get at it, and he turned his attention to it immediately, before looking to her and giving her a brief nod in thanks and walking over to take it.
Alema was unsurprised when he drank it down as quickly as he could without getting sick, knowing that he must be both thirsty and likely starving, but they would bring him food soon.
"Lord Maul," Liana called, and Maul blinked, before turning to look at her directly. "You are able to take as long of a shower as you want. There is no water rationing here."
Maul took that in for a moment, his gaze shifting to the refresher, before back to her. "Thank you," he finally said, and that voice, while still a bit rough, was getting back to its usual measured cadence. It was good to hear, and both women nodded, before Maul turned back, collecting some clothes from his chest, and moving to retreat to the refresher. He paused in the threshold for a moment, staring into it, and then turned back to them. "Do you know," he started softly, "when last I oiled my horns?"
"I will find out," Alema said, immediately asking to see who had been on duty the last time he had. She gave a nod at the answer, "you may oil them today, Lord Maul."
"Thank you," he said again, and finally slipped into the refresher.
This then…was something of a relief as much as it was a stark reminder that Maul truly hadn't been unaware. He had been there, had heard and likely felt everything, but he had been…completely unable to operate, and it brought a vibroblade of pain to her heart. Liana grasped her forearm, squeezing, and Alema shifted her hand to grip her own, before they finally let go.
Maul was here now, was aware and working through his own routine and using his own methods.
It was…good. It was good.
They were walking.
They were taking their first steps into freedom.
Alema loved to see it, and she gave a look to Liana, before drawing the smile across her mask, one that Liana returned on her own.
Maul awoke with a choked-down gasp, his mind flaring bright as he felt himself come to consciousness with the feeling of a punch to the gut.
For just a moment he was aware of everything, everything, in a way he felt he never had been. The beating of his hearts, the feeling of his lungs expanding and contracting…Maul thought he could feel the rush of blood in his veins. His body tingled with the rough fabric of his tunic, the softness of the blanket over his head, and the hard press of the wall to his back. He took one breath and then another, letting them out slow, the acrid smell of his own sweat in his nose, the feeling of tackiness on his skin from much the same.
Maul took all of this in, letting it envelope him, and relished in it, even as it threatened to overwhelm him with just how much there actually was to know.
Maul had forgotten it.
Maul felt a bit as though he had been underwater for the longest time and had finally made it to the surface.
Maul felt as though he could finally breathe.
For just a moment Maul allowed himself to breathe, and then he stretched himself out slowly, feeling the muscles in his limbs, the stretch and the pull and the shift, and rolled out of bed, allowing his reflexes do the work even as his mind tried to keep up.
His body knew what to do, and Maul would let it, letting himself work his way through a modified version of his usual exercises while his mind began orienting himself within his body.
Maul thought it would be easier with the Force, but that was not an option, and so for right now he would work his way through it.
Maul ran through a series of pushups, breathing slow, feeling it come in, feeling it go out, and he could hear…rustling, movement, the step of the guards that he knew were outside of his cell, the pounding of the blood in his ears. Maul could feel the coolness of the tile floor beneath his hands (he idly wondered where his gloves were), the flex, the pull, the push. Maul burned and it was good.
It was good.
Maul was awake.
Maul was no longer trapped in the orders and the fog.
Maul wanted.
Maul relished in the idea for a moment, letting himself work through the pushups before rolling to his back.
He closed his eyes initially against the burn of the lights above, but soon opened them again, forcing himself to get used to the light and the feeling, following the routine of one-two punch on every completion.
Maul also became aware of a…lack.
He did not feel quite as stable in his core, and Maul resolved to do more than his usual set. He would build that back up. Maul would remove that lack.
Maul also slowly began allowing himself to process, to think of what had happened and what he remembered.
In a lot of ways, it was like looking back on a fog. He was aware of…words, of thoughts, of a past and a present that had intertwined and…
Maul had not thought of Meltch Krakko in so long. Had not thought of…
Maul moved into a plank position, feeling the burn of his muscles, the rough burn at his core.
Maul thought of the Reek on a chain and thought of the chain around himself that he had broken and wondered…
Maul felt that same emptiness, that same idle ache in his chest at the thought of his al'verde that he had with that Guard, the one that had…
Little Cousin.
Maul remembered the one who called him Little Cousin, and his chest panged with that emptiness, that awful lack. The feeling with Meltch was stronger, an ache full of familiarity and the slow awful realization.
Meltch had been trying to help him. Meltch had…had taught him, had blended his words with his Master, but… Only now was Maul realizing just how different Meltch had truly been, how even among the calls of "K'atini!" and the hands that were often so brutal…
Meltch…
Maul did not understand the feelings within him. Did not know how to explain what it meant to him, other than the thought of Plo and those arms that wrapped around him…
Maul wondered if he could ask. Either way he thought it was only fair to warn them. The Jedi were not the first to try and take him from his Master, not the first to try and offer him cin vhetin… And Maul had not known how to take that then. Maul had followed the orders of his Master, and…
Maul had killed what he had not understood.
Maul had followed Orders.
Maul had acted due to the chain that held him.
Maul moved to squats.
He didn't know how long it had been. Did not know how long the water had been over his head, how long he had been unable to truly breathe.
He remembered voices and…Tiq. Tiq had always been there, all the time, from the initial break to… When Maul had come out of it.
Maul also thought of Plo.
Maul also thought of that warmth, that…that hug.
Maul closed his eyes, worked his way through his set until his muscles were trembling, until he felt the good sort of exhausted, and fell into a rough series of stretches that would keep him from cramping, but would be supplemented later.
Maul wanted to shower. He wanted to be clean.
The sound of a slot opening drew his attention back to the Guards, and he realized that there was a bottle of water within, and he immediately went to take it. He had not realized how thirsty he was until he took the first sip and he had to work very hard at keeping himself from downing the entire thing too quickly.
Maul was all too familiar with the way his body reacted when it had been without for so long.
Maul finally downed it all, breathing deep and looking back to the refresher, and then suddenly, softly:
"Lord Maul," one of the Guards said, and Maul turned, looking to the voice with surprise.
Maul had not been aware that they would answer him, had not been aware they could talk to him.
"You are able to take as long of a shower as you want," she said when she knew he was paying attention. "There is no water rationing here."
Maul lowered his head, taking in that statement and realizing what it meant, the offer it actually was. Maul wanted a water shower, wanted the feeling of it in his muscles, to put the temperature up as high as he could take and let it purge him of the lingering fog. Maul looked back to her and in a voice that still felt a bit rough, but nowhere near as unused as it had been, "Thank you."
They nodded in acknowledgement.
Maul went to gather his clothes, but after a moment of thought, merely grabbed his underthings and his pants and left the tunic. It was still scratching at his skin and he still felt a bit raw and oversensitive to just about everything. As he turned back to the refresher, he saw something he hadn't seen before, a small black bottle with a golden lid, and he stared at it for a moment before realizing what it was.
"I'm going to rub this oil on them. I've discovered that what is happening here is that you have a tendency to dry. It's a common problem in younger Zabraks who are still growing and might continue to follow you, but this will help to keep the keratin stronger and keep it from itching. It's going to be a bit cool, but it should warm up quickly…"
This must be what Eeth had been talking about then, the oil he was meant to apply to the skin around his horns and the horns themselves. He thought that it was meant to be every two days that he applied the oil. He wondered if that was all the time or only until his skin and horns began to take to it… Either way, Maul found himself with a bit of a problem.
Maul did not know how long it had been.
The Guards had already talked to him…that meant that he…he could talk to them, could he not?
"Do you know," he started softly, measuring the words on his tongue, "when last I oiled my horns?"
"I will find out," the other Guard said, her voice also female. Maul thought that they must have some method of comm within those masks because Maul heard no question, or response, but a brief moment later she nodded and said, "you may oil them today, Lord Maul."
"Thank you," Maul returned with a dip of his head, and finally walked into the refresher.
He did his business briefly before turning his attention to the shower and the water setting that he had almost never touched. He turned it on and was briefly startled by the cold before he remembered the feeling of his body being dunked in ice, the way it had shocked his system back into working. He also vaguely remembered Tiq changing him and closed his eyes.
Well.
That was not necessarily something he wanted seen or to have been done to him, but at the time…he had not cared. Maul could not get upset about it now. There was no point. It would likely just hurt the both of them, and for now…for right now, Maul was tired of hurt.
It was not as though he could use it anyway.
He turned the water temperature up, going to strip and finding with a grimace that he almost had to peel the tunic from his skin, before finally stepping into the shower and letting it pound down upon him.
Maul did not know how long he stood there, simply relishing in the feeling of the water, the heat across his skin, and then finally began cleaning himself of what felt like two layers of caked-on sweat.
Disgusting.
Finally, clean he dried off and pulled on his clothes, before turning his attention to the oil for his horns. He remembered the sensation vaguely, and carefully opened the lid before he dabbed the oil itself on his fingers. It was viscous and warmed quickly, and when he finally smoothed it on his forehorn he realized it had…grown…not much, but it had grown.
Maul was missing more than days.
Maul was missing months…
Maul took this in for a moment, feeling something yawning and empty reaching for him, but he pressed the oil on, and rubbed it deep.
Maul wanted.
He would not let this feeling strip that want from him.
Maul finished applying the oil, rubbing it into the horns on his head and the base around them. When he was finished with the horns, he rubbed the excess into the skin of his hands. It was…nice and had a faint smell of herbs. He looked at his reflection for a moment, taking in the new length to his horns, taking in the tattoos on his face and the way they went down along his chest, before finally letting his gaze drift back up to meet the soft gold of his eyes that were still so unfamiliar to him… Maul had not seen them without that internal burn for so long, he had forgotten they used to be this color.
Maul had apparently forced himself to forget a lot of things.
Maul finally left the refresher and hoped that they brought food soon. Until then, Maul sunk to the ground, and began to stretch.
There was a lingering stiffness in his limbs, and he needed to work that out of him.
Liana Mun watched as Maul finally came out of the shower, without a tunic and in bare feet, looking a lot like her own teenage Padawan many, many years ago, only, of course, with a great deal more tattoos. The soles of his feet to the top of his head…
It was funny how in those moments Liana could really see how young he actually was.
It was also funny the way that it seemed no matter their species, when it came down to it, most boys were the same. When they got an opportunity, they'd revel in their own physique.
Liana cocked her head at Alema who tilted her head in return, the both of them giving the slightest of rolls in the opposite direction, indicating the eyeroll the two of them shared. Liana laughed quietly, before calling Tiq, knowing that Alema was calling Plo. She knew how teen boys worked. The thing he would be wanting next was food – and frankly he deserved it.
Maul then started working on a stretching routine, a more brutal and frankly impressive one than he had utilized when he had finished exercising. She had to assume that he was working out some lingering stiffness. It also helped highlight the physique that he seemed to be relishing in, and…
Liana knew that Maul was a Nightbrother. She knew that his people were enslaved in the same way that Alema's were enslaved. Though…Nightbrothers were slaves born. Twi'leks were ultimately slaves stolen.
Liana did not hold the same critical eye as Alema. She did not have the practice, had no reason for it. Liana could only look as someone who would have seen it from a distance, not as someone who would have seen her own people, regardless of the humans that were enslaved – their current charge Anakin was a very strong example of that. Liana could take in those markings, watch the stretch of a body honed to near perfection that would only get better, and see exactly why they would be so prized.
Liana thought of her own Padawan so many years ago and felt that low rumbling of disgust and disquiet run through her. It was not right for that to be the line of thought that trailed between a teenager acting in a way she was familiar with, and similarly knew that most of the ones who had raised a teenage boy were familiar with, to the knowledge that Maul was an enslaved race.
Dathomir and their witches.
"Reminds me of Alek," Alema said, her voice warm and amused, and Liana took a breath, letting it out as well as the lingering thoughts of resentment and anger.
For now, there was nothing they could do.
For now, they were in stalemate and the attempts to bring otherwise would lead to destruction and loss and could hurt or otherwise kill the ones they hoped to save.
But it would not always be that way. Liana wished dearly that she would be alive to see it.
"I was thinking of Li'nith," Liana retorted, Alema laughing aloud.
"You're not wrong," Alema agreed. "Li'nith was very for that particular look for a while."
"I'm actually happy to see him come out like that," Liana said after a moment. "I don't know that I have seen him outside of the full ensemble the entire time he's been here."
"He's probably relishing in the feeling of being here, of being whole," Alema said. There was a pause, heavy. "It hurts to think of Li'nith."
"Have you checked on your old Padawans lately?" Liana asked, thinking of how she had found Alek just the other day, how she had watched him from a distance and remembered how proud she was.
"I have," Alema said.
Liana took in the heaviness in her voice and knew that she was thinking much the same as she was. She was thinking of her own Padawan and thinking how anyone could do that to their charge. To the one in their care.
How could someone enslave a child that had loved them?
"He's taking the steps now, Alema," Liana said, as much to reassure her as to reassure herself. "We will get there. He will get there. I have faith in him. He has a will of Beskar, there's no other way he would have been able to last as long as he has if he did not. He's chosen to take those steps, and I have faith in him to continue the journey."
"And we can help him when we're able," Alema said, staring straight ahead, her masked head tilting up in the salute and promise of the Guards, and Liana repeated the motion.
"Oh, holy shit, I have never seen Alec pull that off," Liana said then, catching sight of Maul pressing his torso flat to the ground while his legs moved into a full split, and then shifting his torso to the side to stretch his hips, one arm flat along the ground while the other rose in the air, his elbow pointed towards the ceiling.
Alema burst out laughing, "'Oh, holy shit,'" she repeated.
"Shut up, Alema! I thought he snapped his fool spine!"
Alema laughed harder.
The sight of Tiq and Plo approaching had the both of them hurriedly working to maintain composure, breathing out their amusement and joy, the soft lingering pangs of bittersweetness, and the anger that underlay everything, and they breathed in the necessary calm.
Baby steps, Liana reminded herself. She had walked baby steps with her own Padawan. They could do this. It would be alright.
It was time to finally remove that collar.
It was time for forward motion.
Plo carried the tray of food next to Tiq, feeling the warmth and excitement rising the closer they got to that cell. The Guards were standing at their usual attention, both saluting at their approach. The two of them bowed in return, and then turned their attention to the cell.
Plo thought if he had eyebrows, they would have launched themselves right off his forehead.
Maul had twisted himself in such a way that Plo found both extremely impressive and…admittedly rather disconcerting. The full split in combination with that particular twist was…a bit much, he thought. Though when Maul noticed them and instead of righting himself merely took that elbow that was in the air and twisted himself completely to the right, following that elbow back until it was pressed on the ground and folded himself roughly in half with his legs pressed on the ground one way and his back the other…
That…more than justified Tiq's cry of surprise.
"Force help me," Tiq managed, "Did you break your back or something? Do you have a spine?"
Maul's brows pinched slightly before he slowly unfolded himself from his stretch, straightening up and crossing his legs beneath him.
"I did not, and I do," Maul answered, and his gaze was moving towards that tray that Plo was holding. His gaze hesitated there for a moment, and then trailed back up to Plo, his look… Plo smiled at him, the look warm and reassuring and the Guards opened the door, letting them through. Maul blinked, looking surprised momentarily at the number of people entering, but when Plo placed the tray upon the ground he no longer seemed to care.
Plo absolutely did not blame him.
Orientation, Tiq had explained, let him go at his own pace, let him guide where it goes and how, we are there to facilitate.
Plo was more than willing to wait.
Maul looked from them to the tray and Plo waved a hand, "Please go ahead. We will wait."
Maul hesitated before softly, "Thank you."
And then immediately went for it.
Plo watched in amusement as Maul took some of the bloodier cuts of meat and worked on wolfing them down, sinking his fangs into it and ripping. It wasn't the cleanest way of eating but frankly it didn't matter. Maul had been without the ability to really enjoy any of this in so long…
After the first two Maul slowed way down, his hunger slaked for the time being and simply allowed himself to savor it. Plo and Tiq both began talking quietly, keeping it light and on other things, reminding Maul that they were both still there and that he did not have to hurry.
When Maul finally finished, he pushed the tray away from himself, giving a soft huff of satisfaction. Maul cleaned his hands and his mouth with the wipes they had given him, getting rid of the excess blood, and placed the used wipes back down on the tray when he was done. Tiq sent it to the slot with the Force, something that Maul watched with eyes that…
That was hunger in that gaze. Hunger of a different sort.
Plo could barely wait.
"Thank you," Maul said again, and those golden eyes finally focused on both of them, before finally drifting towards Plo to settle. Maul's gaze shifted, looking a bit like he did not know how to approach what he was going to say, and Plo waited patiently, trying to keep his posture as open and nonthreatening as possible. "You…" he paused, hesitating, "you said you would teach me."
Plo smiled at him, trying to give it all of the warmth all of the compassion that he could, "I did," he agreed. "We all will if you would let us. We will all help you. We all wish to help you."
Maul took this in, his gaze drifting to Tiq and finally letting his head bow.
Maul said nothing.
"What does that make you?" he asked softly. "Is it a Master?"
"Perhaps," Plo said, feeling a jolt in his chest, "a Teacher."
Maul's head tilted slightly, taking in this statement, taking in this term and finally, slowly gave a single nod.
"Yes," he agreed finally, "I see. A Teacher."
It was a step.
Plo was proud.