A/N: Thank you guys for the positive reviews! I'm glad people are liking the story thus far and will hopefully continue to like it as I keep going. I don't have much to say other than that I am glad AOT had such an amazing run over the years, I still remember the hype back when season 1 was going on. To me, I won't really fuss about the ending, no matter how it ends because I'm just glad I could be around to enjoy it. Of course that also means I have not read the manga so no spoilers please!
Onto the chapter!
"How are you feeling Alphonse? Got any questions? Concerns? Doubts?" Ilse asked him with concern as she sat atop her horse beside him.
He smirked at her. "Even if I did, it's far past the point of no return." He jerked his head at the gathered crowd as they were waiting for the gates to raise. "Don't worry about me, squad leader, I have everything memorized, I have all my flares and equipment and I'll make sure to stay close to you."
She sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time today. "I know but I still can't help but wonder why Erwin chose you to be on the left wing with us spotters. Surely you would be safer with the recruits in the signaling squads." She bit her lips. "We lose too many already, we can't lose you on your first mission too."
Ilse made a great point, something many of the other squad leaders had said to Erwin. As a part of the spotting squad, he and the others were responsible for detecting any incoming titans and therefore were at the outermost edge of the scouting formation.
He also knew this meant the spotters came in contact with titans the most and were the first to get destroyed if they got overwhelmed. As such it was required to have the most reliable soldiers in such places.
So the role suited him just fine. In fact, perhaps Erwin knew of this and chose to take the risk anyway.
"I'll be fine, squad leader." He reassured her calmly. He heard the gates open and straightened up. "Let's get back safe and sound."
She smiled at his calm words. "Yeah, let's all come back safe and sound."
Erwins booming voice grabbed their attention. "The 30th Expedition to reclaim land beyond the walls has officially begun! Give your hearts once more to the future of humanity my soldiers!"
He looked around at the cheers Erwin received as the front of the column began moving out. Even Ilse joined in as she raised one of her swords in the air but he felt no such joy. Even in another world, the soldier in him treated this just like any other mission. As he rode out with the Scouts however he found a long lost nostalgia of comradery of being under a squad leader.
'God how long has it been since I took part in a large operation like this?' He thought back several years ago, back when he was a part of a company of others within the Project. That was a time where he was privileged to have such amazing people around him for every single mission. Until it was time for his reassignment as a solo operative. A nostalgic smile formed on his face as he fanned out with his squad leader. 'I wonder what they're doing right now?'
He stayed behind her and the others as their left wing formed up with the rest of the formation and rode out into titan territory. The cheers of the civilians and scouts alike quickly became replaced by eerie silence as they rode through no man's land. He kept himself on high alert, taking in every detail to ensure no titan would surprise them.
The others quietly talked amongst themselves as boredom set in but he kept to himself, opting to keep his head on a swivel for any titans. And for a long while he saw nothing but trees and rolling hills. Among the picturesque scenery however, he came upon a sight he had not seen in years. His eyes widened as the gentle downward slope and treeline around him merged with an old memory.
"Alright Easy Company, Operation Rolling Thunder is a go! We got the heavies with us today, we hit em fast and we hit em hard!"
He looked straight ahead with eyes wide, where in his memory was a large munitions factory on the edges of a large industrial town.
Every attempt to destroy the factory via bombers ended in flaming wreakage so we were here to do it the old fashioned way.
"The flyboys are getting torn apart up there but they're giving us the cover needed to destroy this munitions factory! Let's make all their hard work count for something!"
This was it, the final push to end this war and they were desperate enough to allow him to join Easy Company. These were the best the Project had to offer, never in its history has there been a more elite unit of soldiers.
And here he was among them and not behind enemy lines for once.
He was tapped on his shoulder.
"Only easy day was yesterday, right?"
He smiled. "Heh, damn right."
He blinked as he came back… to an empty grassland.
He had never been here before…..right? He had to physically shake his head to get rid of the vivid memory. He craned his head up at the sky as he took a deep breath to focus himself on the mission at hand.
But no matter how hard he tried the lingering smells of gunpowder, oils of machinery and death still lingered in the back of his mind.
"Titan off to our 10'oclock! 15 meter!"
He thanked the voice that gave him something to latch onto.
"Alphonse, the flare!" Ilse commanded as she looked at him.
He nodded and pulled out his flare gun and loaded a red flare before shooting it up. He pocketed the gun and focused on the next steps.
Erwin should give them a course change.
As if on demand a green flare shot up, indicating the change in direction. Ilse moved over as the whole wing began moving in unison, all ready to fight at a moment's notice. He wordlessly followed Ilse as he gripped the reins on his horse tightly.
He saw several more red flares coming from the rear guard and the right wing. There was a moment of silence as they awaited Erwins orders, before a green flare could be signed, more red flares came from the right wing, this time towards where he imagined the front of the formation would be. Judging by the higher frequency, they were in trouble. A part of him wanted to rush over and help but he reigned in the feeling quickly. He had to trust them to carry out their mission while he carried out his own.
Even so, he felt helpless and he hated it. He clenched his teeth, frustrated in his inability to save the scouts who were no doubt in danger.
"Eyes up Alphonse! We're almost at the town!" Ilse barked at him, getting his attention again.
He gave her a quick nod. If he was the younger version of himself, he would've told her to go screw herself before charging head long into a fight, just mindlessly chasing after his dream.
But that soldier was long gone now, having that habit literally beaten out of him numerous times. Of course every time he got a chance to sit down and reflect on his own rash actions, he was painfully reminded of the many times he had inadvertently led his comrades to their own death.
And each death and each time he had been beaten half to death for insubordination was a painful and sobering reminder of his own limitations. After all, he was a soldier. Unless the mission specifically called for it, saving lives have always been secondary at best and unfortunately for him, he never got such missions.
"Ilse, is the right wing going to be okay?" He yelled from behind her as they quickly came up on a ruined town.
"That's not for us to think about! You just have to trust them Alphonse!" She shouted back as she kept her face forward, scanning for any titans.
A singular green flare fired up directly ahead. 'Erwin wants to push for the town? But the right wing…' His mind went through the scenarios of what would happen if they didn't alter their course. It would ensure the majority of their force would get to the town intact but at what cost to the right wing? How many would die in the process?
"Understood!" He replied as level headed as he could.
While he could see why Erwin would make such a choice, in fact any military commander worth a damn would probably do the same, such actions would never sit right with him.
Sacrifice one to save two.
He was all too familiar with that kind of pragmatic thinking but he hated it all the same.
Wordlessly, Ilse and the others pressed their advance as they sped ahead. He quickly prompted his horse to do the same as he tried to keep pace with the others.
Any more negative thoughts were forced down as they entered the town and dismounted from their horses. They quickly spread out and scoured the area for any titans. This next part was their main objective for the expedition. Depending on how well this expedition went, they could potentially have a forward operating and resupply base for deeper expeditions later on.
It was a relatively small town, so he quickly got a chance to see the other sections. He planted himself on top of a rooftop of a bell tower since it was the highest point in the little town. He watched as the supply wagons were starting to get unloaded and horses were tied up at a nearby stable but the new recruits were fumbling with their hands, slowing the process down. His eyes narrowed as he found large humanoid figures off in the distance. The titans were a few kilometers out and closing in.
Erwin most likely wanted to draw the titans in to finish them in town, where they could use their ODM gear to their advantage.
He noticed however they were coming from where the right wing was.
He pursed his lips in sadness at the thought of the destroyed section. He sighed and looked around, trying to find his squad leader. From behind him, he heard a hook dig into the tower before a familiar sound of zipping wires reached his ears. When he looked at the source of the noise, he found Ilse pulling herself up. "Squad leader, we got some titans headed our way." He pointed at the titans off in the distance.
"Damn it." She cursed as she squinted her eyes to see the monstrous figures. "Coming from the right wing too….were they completely destroyed?"
He gave her a blank stare. "Orders?"
She looked away from his eyes, her hesitation clear. "I'll-I'll have to ask our section commander." She leaped down and zipped away from him.
His eyes never left the spot where she stood. He closed his eyes and drew several deep calming breaths. When he opened his eyes, he kept his vision glued to the incoming titans.
Precious minutes ticked by with no word from Ilse. He kept his displeasure with the whole situation to himself, thankful for his decade long experience with such matters back home. Otherwise he probably would've ignored everything else.
But he was better than that.
It still didn't change the fact that the titans were now unbearably close to town. The damn things were nearly on top of them. 'Where the hell are our orders? What the hell is taking you so long, Erwin?'
Suddenly he heard a flare go off behind him. His eyes widened as it was a red flare.
More titans, this time from the other side of town. They were effectively put in between a pincer attack. Was it just a coincidence? The timing was far too perfect for his liking. He narrowed his eyes as he began thinking of the next best course of action.
Erwin had said the titans possessed no abilities to coordinate an attack, they were monsters that acted on instinct, not intelligence and yet here they were in the middle of a town, pinched on two sides by titans in almost perfect unison.
"Alphonse!" Ilse called out to him, grabbing his attention. She was maneuvering towards him with a grim expression on her face. She landed on top of the tower next to him again. "We got a dozen titans, 5-15 meter class, coming in from the other side of town, they appeared out of nowhere!" She let out a frustrated sigh. "How could we have missed them?! Mike should've smelled them before they could've gotten so close!"
He did not like the sound of that.
Now, it meant there were nearly two dozen or more titans bearing down on this little town. "What are our orders?" He asked calmly, already knowing what it would be.
"We've got to hold here and cover for the transports, they'll need time to get going again. Then we break out of here. Mission is a failure."
They didn't even get a chance to set up the forward operating base they were here for. He sighed, all that life lost, for nothing. "Understood."
Ilse nodded at him before moving over to the rest of the squad. He followed closely behind her as they formed with their squad. Looking around, he found the rest of the other squads spread out in a rough line.
They had to stop the titans here.
Attaching his blades, he stood next to Ilse. He glanced over at her, she looked scared as she shakily held onto her swords. "How many expeditions have you been on so far Ilse?"
"T-This is my third." Her voice dropped several octaves into a hushed whisper so no one else could hear her. "And probably my last."
He gently placed a hand on her shoulder and gave her a firm squeeze. "You'll make it through this, we all will." He reassured her. His eyes narrowed as the titans entered the town. "Let's all make it back home."
She swallowed her fear and stepped forward. "Yeah, let's….I still have many questions to ask you so stick close to me." she attempted to give him a confident smile but she just couldn't shake the fear from her face.
"Let's go then. It's showtime." He grimly responded as the others engaged. Finally he could see what these monsters were capable of.
Their squad of four charged ahead with Ilse leading and him trailing right behind her. The other two were trailing behind him and off to the side to ensure they weren't going to be flanked.
He latched onto the side of a house and pulled himself high in the air. There were 3 titans directly in front of their squad.
A 15 meter and two 7 meter titans were lumbering down the street.
"Alphonse and I will go for the 15 meter class first! You two cover us and pull the others away from it!" Ilse barked out as she ran along the rooftops towards the larger titan. He landed behind her and sprinted after her, quickly catching up to the squad leader.
"Yes ma'am!"
"On it!"
The grotesque looking titan had a permanent frown on its face as it turned towards us. He saw the large arm wind back before lashing out to grab one of them. Ilse leaped to the side and off the roof, disappearing into the alley beside them.
He jumped over the appendage as it tore across the roof. He made sure to avoid the holes in the roof as he landed and leaped over to an adjacent house before latching onto the house across the street. Jumping off, he saw the other two titans distracted by the rest of his squad some few dozen meters away. His eyes turned to the titan. Huge black emotionless eyes stared back at him.
It was by far one of the most unnerving things he had felt in a long time, just having a staring contest with a titan as he flew across the street.
He saw a hand reach out to grab him. Thinking fast, he pulled his legs to his chest and used the hand as a springboard to reach the last few feet to the roof. He leaped back as another hand swung down at him. The roof caved in at the strike, peppering him with debris but otherwise doing nothing else.
He saw a pair of hooks land on the shoulder of the titan before a black streak came across and sliced its nape open cleanly. Ilse emerged from the other side and landed on the house next to his.
"Nice work Alphonse!"
He gave her a thumbs up before a shrill scream reached his ears. He whipped around at the sound.
One of the titans had grabbed a hold of one his squadmates and began tearing him apart limb from limb with a sick unflinching smile on its face. His eyes widened at the brutal act before he sprang into action.
He leaped down to the street and sprinted to the duo but it was too late.
The screams of pain ended sharply as large teeth decapitated the scout.
His eyes narrowed in anger as he shot his hooks into the monster. He swung upwards and cut through the nape cleanly. For a moment he hung in the air and his sharp eyes could make out the situation of the others. Down and to the side, his lone surviving squad mate stood on the roof in shock as the last of the 7 meter titans were attempting to grab him.
The nearest squad looked worse for wear as the rest of the titans seemed to converge on them. The rest of the wing were rushing to their aid but it looked bad as another scout was ripped in half.
He turned his attention back to the task at hand and gripped his swords tightly before diving down to save his shell shocked comrade. He twisted his body as he passed the nape and cut the nape as he dive bombed down. He latched onto the nearby wall and pulled out of the dive and onto the roof of the house. He looked his squad mate in the eyes, nodding.
His eyes widened and his mouth moved to speak as he saw another danger coming straight for the man.
"Than-!' Whatever he was going to say was cut short as the house he was standing on was destroyed by a titan diving headlong into it with arms stretched out in front of it.
He shielded his eyes from the plume of dust kicked up and had to take a step back from the tremor of the titan landing.
"AHHHHHH-!" His scream was cut short with a sickening crunch of bones.
He waited patiently for the dust to settle with clenched teeth. No matter how many times he had seen it, heard it, smelled it…..death never came any easier. It only served to sharpen his blade as he was forced to be constantly reminded of his own powerlessness, of his own sin of being unable to save them.
'Not one more.' He grimly reminded himself. 'No more holding back.' Why was he holding back in the first place? He had never handicapped himself for any mission, so why now? To respect the chain of command? To respect the order of this world? To respect Erwins position? Or fear of his own volatile place in this new frontier?
Screw it all, he had lives to save.
Nothing else mattered.
And if his choices were to either mindlessly follow orders or cut loose and force the mission, meaning saving lives and giving meaning to the lives he had killed today….then it really wasn't a choice at all.
"Fuck! We lost our top cover!"
"Damn it, Captain, we gotta pull back!"
"Who gives a shit! We end this here, dead or alive!"
"That's an Abnormal! Get back Alphonse!" Ilse shrieked as she backed off to give herself room from the aberrant titan.
He ignored her as he slowly began walking along the roof, circling the beast.
As the dust settled, he found the titan on its stomach holding the limp body of the scout with both hands. He stared right at the beast, its black eyes swallowing his own hazel like a black hole.
"Chief, you're with me! At least I can count on you! We're winning the war for Eldia!"
"Yes sir!" He watched his captain push ahead under a shower of gunfire. He angrily turned back at the rest of Easy Company. "Come on! Do you intend to live forever?!"
He calmly circled the monster, their eyes never leaving each other. "Come on, titan, do you intend to live forever?" He muttered to the mindless beast.
The titan slowly dropped the dead body and placed its hands underneath its body, legs tensing as it readied itself to pounce on all fours. With a roar it pounced on him with frightening speed, closing the gap almost instantly.
He sidestepped the open jaw and leaped past the face of the mindless titan as it landed on top of the house. As he did, he ran his blades deep into the cheeks before standing on its back. There was a loud thunk as one side of the jaw hung down from its face.
Without a word he raised his swords and swung hard across the nape. He felt the titan shudder and twitch as he destroyed its weak spot. "Guess not." He commented as he jumped off the dead titan.
Ilse landed in front of him with a worried and angry expression on her face. "Alphonse! That was dangerous! You never know what an Abnormal might do, keep your distance next time and work with others to take it down!"
He stared into her yellowish gold colored eyes. "I'm fine squad leader." He jerked his head to the other squads fighting for their lives. "Let's help the others, we got more work to do." Without waiting for a reply he rushed to the aid of the others.
"Damn it! Hold on Alphonse!" She yelled after him.
The majority of the fighting took place just a couple blocks ahead. A flurry of scouts flying through the air accompanied the sounds of titans roaring. His eyes caught a scout caught in the hands of a small 5 meter titan on the street.
He dove down low and flew by the scout as he killed the small titan. He depressed the trigger on his handle and shot forward at full speed, uncaring of his gas usage.
"Nanaba! Watch out!"
Ignoring the surprised yelp of the female scout he blitzed past her and towards the group of five titans down the street. Their bloodied teeth and hands were all the evidence he needed to know what happened to the original squad that took the brunt of the main body of the titans. He let himself fall onto the street as he took off at breakneck speed.
A speed that a normal human could never reach, something even the best scouts would have a hard time keeping up with using ODM gear.
The sides of his vision blurred as he darted through the uneven stone streets. He was acutely aware of the dark alleyways that could host a titan but he kept his main sight on the five in front of him.
"Holy shit!"
"Leave him Nanaba! Squad Mike and everyone else! Form up, take care of the isolated ones first!"
The five titans stood around the main plaza of the town, a circular clearing just big enough for five of the lumbering beasts.
He noted the tallest standing a little above 17 meters and the smallest at 10 meters. They began moving about to find more scouts to kill,
They hadn't seen him yet and the one he could see directly ahead of him had its back to him.
Once he got closer, he anchored his left hook onto the upper back of the titan and propelled himself ahead. With only one hook holding him, his body naturally twisted to the side, his left shoulder now facing the titan now. His lips cracked a smile as the titan turned at feeling the hooks dig into its flesh. It reached over to grab his line.
The world seemed to slow as he focused on the battle ahead of him.
He instantly hooked onto the nearest house next to the titan and pulled himself towards the house. He had half expected one or more of the hooks to get dislodged but they stayed true to their anchor points. The left went tight immediately as he reeled himself in, the sudden jerk causing the titan to stumble just enough to prevent it from grabbing the line.
Taking the brief window, he detached the hook on the house and used the full power of his compressed gas to fly forward. Using the natural feel of his body, he twisted in a circular motion and cut through the nape. At the apex of his flight he found a titan beneath him with its jaw open and arms reaching up to grab him. Flicking his wrists down, he detached both blades and let the swords fly at the hands. One dug into the palms and the other slipped through its fingers and into its eye.
He ignored its roar of pain and attached two more swords as he swung onto his next target. The 17 meter titan stood near the center of the plaza and stared at him motionless. He filed its unusual behavior as an Abnormal titan but had to serve to the side as one of the other titans made a grab for him. The action forced him to serve out of the way and nearly made him smash into a stone wall.
Running along the wall he pushed off the stone structure and onto the plaza below with a roll. He hooked onto the lower leg of the Abnormal and reeled himself in fast, just barely evading two pairs of hands grabbing for him as he did. Even now with his hooks in its legs, the Abnormal didn't react, it was only when he swung past its leg and got behind it, did it decide to act.
A shadow loomed over him as the titan fell backwards, intending on crushing him. Using his gas he pushed himself out of the way just as the large body fell with a loud boom. A small cloud of debris and dust covered the titan, giving him a chance to kill one of the other three.
He turned to one of the titans that had tried to grab him earlier, it was still trying to get up. He landed on the ground and ran towards it. But he was just a second too late as it rose to its full height, towering over him. He rolled to the side to evade a stomp. He slid on the ground using his gas to propel him along the coarse surface. The act caused sparks to fly from his tank and scabbard.
He swung at the achilles heel of the titan as he passed it, forcing it on its knee. With a grunt he jumped on the back of the titan and ran along the spine towards the back of its neck. Once he reached the nape, he swung both blades in front of him, killing the titan.
He immediately jumped off the corpse to avoid the nearby titan jumping on him. As soon as his feet touched the ground he saw Ilse swing down across his vision with a furious expression on her face as she killed the titan that nearly bit him in half. Across from him, he found the titan he wounded earlier struck down by a yellow blur.
"You're crazy kid!" Mike yelled as he landed on a nearby roof. "Nanaba! Back off from that Abnormal!"
Ilse landed next to Mike with an angry and disapproving expression. "Alphonse! Don't go off on your own like that! Do you have any idea what could've happened?"
He looked up at them with a neutral expression. "I do." He bluntly replied before he turned his attention back to the Abnormal titan, the only one left. To his surprise, the titan was staying on the ground on its back. The position made it impossible to kill it with their swords.
It knew it too, judging by the seemingly taunting look it gave him. He breathed out and slowly walked towards it. He glanced at Mike on the roof and gave him a subtle nod, entrusting him to follow up.
All he got was a disbelieving look.
"Alphonse, don't get closer to it!"
He ignored Ilse and continued on, taking slow and deliberate steps. He stared into the abyss that was the titans eyes and sheathed his swords. 'Would an Abnormal even be able to understand a human taunting it?' He mused as he drew closer, empty handed.
Turns out, it somehow did.
He smirked as the titan roared in anger and leaped at him, jaw wide open. He backpedaled several meters to let the huge titan burn off some of its speed as it dragged itself along the ground. Taking a deep breath, he opened both palms and prepared to catch the beast.
'Come on, nanomachines, do your thing or else I get to be titan food.' He morbidly thought as the mouth crashed into him. With a grunt he caught the teeth with his hands, his left hand holding the lower jaw back while his right held the top. His feet were dragged along the ground as he got pushed back several more meters, nearly smashing him into a house. They finally ground to a halt as he held the titan back.
He winced as he smelled the disgusting hot breath of the monster but otherwise held firm in his spot. 'Come on Mike! Before I get ground up here!' He mentally begged the squad leader. Titan shifted, indicating to him, a very nasty pair of hands were coming to crush him.
But that stopped as Mike swung down and killed the titan. Sighing at the limp mass in front of him, he stepped back and took several deep breaths. After calming his beating heart, he stepped around the corpse. Looking up, he found Mike staring at him with pure shock and anger.
"If that wasn't the most suicidal thing I have seen then I don't know what is." Mike admonished as he jumped down from the decaying carcass. "How the hell did you even manage that?"
He nonchalantly shrugged. "I do a lot of pushups."
Mike snorted at the answer before he sighed as he looked around. "We managed to get them all but we lost a lot though." He muttered as the rest of the survivors rallied around them, and there weren't many left. The surprise attack took a toll on them as a whole.
Briefly, his eyes met Ilse's. She looked away from him with a huff.
'I'll have to make it up to her later somehow.' He thought as Mike's squad landed beside them. He lightly tapped his gas canister, holding back a grimace as it sounded emptier than expected. He still sucked at regulating how much gas he used.
"So what now?" Gelgar asked as he threw away a pair of broken blades from his handles. "Should we reinforce Commander Erwin and the transports?"
He nodded at the suggestion. "I second that squad leader."
Mike looked around at the gathered scouts. "That's a call for the section commander…speaking of, where is he?"
"Dead." Nanaba stated as she rubbed her arm uncomfortably. "Saw him get eaten earlier by that Abnormal."
Mike closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh. "Damn it alright, I'm in command then." He looked at him for a moment before turning to the others. "How's everyone's looking right now? Good on gas? Swords? Any injuries?"
He nodded quickly. "I'm good to go."
Everyone else sounded off afterwards. The fight had been relatively short, if a bit chaotic but that left them with plenty of equipment to work with, except for him but he kept it quiet from the senior scouts. Without another word he hooked onto the nearby roof that Ilse was on and climbed onto it.
"Alright then." Mike sniffed the air. "Unless more titans appear out of thin air, we're clear here. Let's regroup with Commander Erwin."
He looked at Ilse, who still refused to look at him. "Come on, Ilse."
Her shoulders slumped, she looked exhausted. "Yeah, let's go."
As the others began moving through the town in their ODM gear, he chose to run along the rooftops to conserve what little gas he had left. He ignored the looks he got, especially from Mike as he seemed to recognize why he wasn't using his gear. Thankfully, the relatively stoic and quiet squad leader said nothing about it.
As he got closer he saw the center force engaging the titans. They were more than he had expected. 'Good thing we're here now.' He thought as he pushed ahead. With a grunt he leaped over a large gap before launching his hooks at a titan that was getting close to a group of scouts near the transports. He flew past behind the titan, killing it as he did so and landed near the scouts.
"Everyone ok?" He asked as he looked at the wagons. There was still plenty of equipment left on board.
One of the scouts let out a shaky breath. "T-Thank you, for saving us. We were trying to resupply when that titan showed up."
He nodded in satisfaction, happy he could save someone. "I can cover for you guys, so hurry up."
"Thank you!" The relatively inexperienced scouts all rushed the wagons, eager to refill their gas canisters.
Looking down at his hips he tapped the metal canister. His lips thinned as he had used up most of what he had left with that last titan. After they finished, he would have to do the same. "Hey after you guys are done-"
"Help! Someone please help!"
His head snapped at the direction of the voice, a very familiar voice. To his horror he found Ilse in the hands of a titan. The world seemed to slow as he saw her terrified expression in the face of certain doom. He didn't say a word to the vulnerable scouts as he blasted off in the direction of his squad leader.
She swung her sword down to cut the hand that was holding her but she only succeeded in cutting a couple fingers off, the grip on her remained firm as she grew closer to the open maws of the titan. Any and all thoughts of his dangerously low gas supply was thrown out as he rushed to her aid. He threw everything he had to reach her.
His horrors intensified as his gas supply ran out completely mid air, leaving him sailing into the edge of a roof. He clawed his way up and in a desperate sprint, ran at the distraught squad leader.
'I won't make it!' He cursed his stupidity internally. If only he had been more careful of his gas expenditure. "Ilse!"
A singular clang of a hook embedding into the roof reached his ears. He saw a black blur spin its way through the nape of the titan, killing it instantly. He slowed to a stop as he saw Levi standing there impassively as he flicked the blood from his hands.
"Captain!" ilse exclaimed as she was dropped by the dead titan.
He let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding. That was close, far too close for his liking. He jogged up to the distraught woman and gently grabbed her shoulders. He looked over her for any broken bones or injuries. "Are you ok?" He finally asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Thank you Alphonse."
"You should be thanking the Captain." He muttered before turning around to face the black haired soldier. "Thank you, Captain. You saved her."
"Think nothing of it." Levi said in monotone as he wiped the rest of the blood off of his handle. "Just be glad I got here in time before she turned into titan shit."
He held a smartass retort and resigned himself to just nodding along. "Where do you need us?"
Levi pointed to the supply wagons he had just left. "First you get resupplied and then you can ask Erwin." He turned to Ilse. "Where's the rest of your squad?"
She looked down, sad at the vivid memory of her squad's death. "Dead sir, it's just a handful of us in the left wing that survived."
"Tch, Ilse you're with me. Alphonse, you do what I said and find Erwin. Figure out what he wants to do in this mess before more titans show up."
He stared at Levi and saluted him. "Sir!" The order suited him just fine, he couldn't bear to look at Ilse in the eyes after his failure. He bent down and jumped as hard as he could, cracking the flimsy roof beneath him. With one leap he crossed the street and onto another house before leaping down to the wagons.
Nothing was said between him and the others as he quickly filled up his tanks again. Looking around, he found a large portion of the supplies still in the carts. There was a large houses nearby that already had some equipment in it and an intact stable with their horses.
And from his memory, this was roughly the center of the town, providing ease of movement to other parts and easily big enough for an expeditionary force to stay for any extended period of time.
It would be a good spot to set up shop.
Making his mind up, he began grabbing as much as he could hold and started moving the large tanks into the house.
"H-Hey, what are you doing?!"
"Cover me! I'll take care of unloading everything." He grunted as he set the tanks down against the wall before running back out. Each time, he grabbed four tanks and sprinted back and forth.
He alone could unload this within minutes. It wasn't going to look pretty but it was better than going back empty handed
"You can't save him, Alphonse." His captain gripped his shoulder tightly as he watched his battle buddy bleed out with an open stomach.
"But you can sure as shit avenge him and if that means killing every single son of a bitch out there to do it then so be it!"
He was so damn worthless he couldn't save the people right in front of him, so in his delusion he figured he could make their lives worth it by completing the mission, saving others or killing anyone who stood in his way.
But it never eased the feeling of guilt that swelled from within him.
Why did he have to survive all this time?
He still couldn't do a damn thing so what was the point?
Fucking. Useless.
All of his strength, for what?
All of it was meaningless, much like his life. All he had to do to end all this was….
Gritting his teeth, he squashed down the dark thoughts that rose up like a nasty bile to focus on the task at hand. He worked feverishly, getting everything set up in a rather haphazard fashion but still usable. If Erwin wanted it to look neat and pretty then they would have to come back later to do it.
And if he got chewed out later by Levi for disobeying his orders then so be it. This was the only validation he could find within himself, the only difference he could make here. For the first time today he found himself sweating as he continued to unload everything in the carts. It didn't take him too long to finish since there were only a small handful of carts.
As soon as he finished though he waved the scouts off and made his way towards where he assumed Erwin would be. The sweat stung his vision as the salty droplets managed their way into his eyes but he ignored the feeling and kept searching for the commander.
Most of the fighting had died down by now, with Levi Squad spearheading the cleanup of the stragglers. His lips thinned in sadness as he saw the mangled bodies of the dead scouts that seemed to litter the streets and along the rooftops. The scene was far too familiar but it was never easy. Some people said that it would get easier, some people said he would get numb to it.
He never did.
Off in the distance he saw a large group of scouts. He squinted his eyes and could just make out Erwins blonde hair poking above the crowd. As he drew closer he could see Ilse and Mike and his squad standing next to Erwin, presumably giving a quick report.
'Wonder if they're saying anything about me?' He wondered as he touched down near them, drawing some attention as he walked through the crowd.
Erwin turned in his direction, his icy blue eyes staring into his own. "Alphonse, good you're here."
He saluted the officer, right hand thumping against his chest. "Sir."
"Currently we're at a crossroads, either we cut our losses now and retreat with the survivors before more titans show up or we can attempt to complete the mission, at the risk of more of our men."
He slowly dropped his hand to his side. Confused as to why he was being asked such a question. "You're asking for my opinion sir?"
Erwin nodded. "I am." Seeing his questioning look, the commander elaborated. "You have a decade of military experience, different world or not, that is valuable experience that few of us have. Tell me in this situation, in your past experiences, what did you do?"
He closed his eyes in a moment of contemplation. The commander hadn't received word about the transport wagons yet so it was natural he was still debating on which choice to make. He was just surprised he was being asked for his input.
"They started this fight and by god it's our job to finish it! Complete the mission!"
His eyes slowly opened as the old words bounced around in his head. "Every time, without fail, no matter the mission, no matter what my obstacles were, I completed the mission." He stood up straight and laced his hands behind his back and stuck out his chest.
"And in my entire decade of military combat thus far, of which I have spent over 2 years on the frontlines of war, I have never failed an assignment given to me and I intend to do the same here. I personally saw to the transports and they have been unloaded, Commander Erwin. Mission is a success sir." He confidently spoke despite how unnatural it felt to say it in such a manner.
He watched the burning wreck of a building from afar as they escaped from the town. They did it, the factory was out of commission and wouldn't be up and running for at least a year. With this the war was nearly at an end.
Or so they thought, too bad the war lasted for another 3.
Because he hated such a notion of completing the mission no matter the cost. More often than not, he didn't find the worth in it. He just wanted to save people, not kill them but when in such an organization like the military, his personal feelings were more often than not repressed. It was never just about him, it was always about the bigger picture.
"Hmmm I see." Erwin stoically took in the news before turning to Levi. "Levi, confirm it for me. Everyone else, get ready to depart!"
He shared a look with Levi before he left for the transports before he stared at Ilse. He slowly worked up the courage to talk to her. "Squad leader."
"Hey Alphonse, are you ok? You took a nasty fall back there."
"I'm good." He sighed and looked away. "Sorry about what happened back there, I ...messed up and you almost died for it.'
She smiled at him reassuringly and waved the concerns off. "It's fine, don't worry about it too much." She gently patted him on the shoulder. "Let's just focus on getting back home and nice work unloading everything. I don't know how you managed to do it in this mess."
"Alright!" Erwin called out, getting his attention along with everyone else. "The transports have been unloaded! We officially now have a forward operating base for future expeditions! Well done men! Mission is a success!"
He bit his lips and looked around at the carnage. 'So this is what they call a successful mission. They lost probably over half their men for a meager FOB in the middle of nowhere.' He watched the remaining scouts celebrate together as they returned to their horses. 'No, I'm also a part of the Scouts now. We lost half of our men for this little thing.'
With a deep, slow exhale he followed behind Ilse as they made their way back to their horses. His eyes bore into the back of her head, the image of her near death still lingering in his mind. "I won't fail next time." He whispered under his breath.
Erwin rubbed his chin in thought as he sat in his office. He had reread the reports on Alphonse a number of times over, especially the ones from squad leader Ilse and Mike, as those two had seen what he was capable of.
He had his own reservations of putting such a high profile individual with the spotters but Alphonse shared a friendly relationship with Ilse so he deemed it worth the risk of being on the frontline. While he was sure Alphonse didn't mind being under the command of anyone, his close ties with Ilse would ensure he followed orders.
"In regards to Alphonse, as a scout I do believe his skills are already more than satisfactory. Judging by how he fought in this past expedition, it has been shown that Alphonse is truly a genius. He had no trouble putting into practice what he learned over the past month, all he needs is more experience with the ODM gear and I believe we have nothing to worry about as a Scout."
However.
"However, while he understands and follows the chain of command, it seems to only be to a point. After that point, he has shown dangerous tendencies to go off on his own. It seems like the deaths of squad mates and others were enough to push him to take matters into his own hand. While he is more than capable as a fighter, strategist and soldier, he is also reckless. Case in point being, charging into a group of 5 titans and then using himself as bait on the ground for the Abnormal titan and then later for pushing himself when he had no gas left."
And speaking of that incident with the Abnormal. He flipped over to reread Mike's report.
"Alphonse shows the promise of being an incredible asset to the Survey Corps and to humanity as a whole. He shows reckless tendencies, such as baiting himself while on the ground for the Abnormal but I believe that is offset by the potential good he can do. For one his physical abilities are beyond human, something not even Captain Levi can compare to. When the Abnormal lunged at him, Alphonse caught the titan by the jaws and held it in place, even more incredible, he didn't even seem winded after the ordeal. With more experience with the ODM gear I am sure he will be a great asset to humanity."
The reports consistent across the board, those who saw Alphonse had the similar things to say about the newcomer. Most of it was good but certain aspects may become a hindrance in the future.
Such as his ideal of saving as many people as he could. There was nothing inherently wrong with it but when it came to strictly military matters, it could prove to be a hindrance. There were times where sacrifices had to be made for the bigger picture.
And yet a question lingered on his mind as he considered the thought.
'How did Alphonse survive all these years in his military? Is this really something that even needs to be looked at?' He idly tapped his ink pen on the paper. After all, he did spend a decade in his military. From what he knew so far, Alphonse had spent the majority of the time as some sort of assassin, often working with few people and behind enemy lines.
Perhaps that's why he was chosen for such jobs, his tendency to chase after his ideals wouldn't get in the way of killing a military target. Doing so would mean insubordination and a person, no matter how strong, never lasted long in a military organization for such acts. Of course, it helped his young age and rather innocent looking demeanor meant no one would suspect him.
Knock! Knock!
He looked up at the wooden door, curious as to who it would be at this hour. "Come in." He gently set the pen down as Alphonse walked in with a solemn expression. "Alphonse, what brings you here?" He motioned the young soldier to sit.
Alphonse nodded and grabbed the seat across from him. "I suppose I should get straight to it, it is late after all. Which, sorry about bothering you so late sir."
He waved him off. "Don't worry about it, I'll be up for a little longer anyway. Now, what's the issue?"
"It's less of an issue and more of a request, sir."
He leaned forward on his elbows, intrigued at whatever request Alphonse had. "What is it?"
The child ran a hand along his short black hairy stubs that were growing on his head. His hair grew fast, he noted offhandedly.
"If it is at all possible, I wish to be an instructor for the cadets in the 104th after word gets out about me. I think I can do some good there. Of course I will still take part in training and expeditions in the Survey Corps."
He looked at Alphonse in surprise. "Why? Why do you want to be an instructor? Were you one back in your military?"
"No I wasn't." He admitted as he looked out the window, seemingly gathering his thoughts. "But…over the years I had some great mentors that helped me along. I wouldn't be a quarter of what I am today if it weren't for all the people that guided me along. And I just want to do the same, pass down what I know to the next generation and help them grow stronger and better than I am."
"Is that right…" He breathed out, actually having to take a moment to see if Alphonse was serious. "And what is it that brought this on? Did something happen today that I need to know?"
For the first time since he had met Alphonse, the young kid showed genuine disappointment.
And it was directed at himself.
"Today…I learned again that I still have a long way to go." He softly admitted, his voice just barely above a whisper. "I thought I could have a bigger impact, that I alone could make a difference but that just isn't the case. A lot of people could've been saved today if I had just been a little stronger, smarter or faster."
"You never know that, there are limits to what you can control and death isn't one of them. Besides it was you who took initiative and finished the mission, you alone did something that would've taken a dozen scouts to do, and in less time no less." He countered, praising him for his quick actions.
Alphonse shook his head. "I just did that out of spite for myself. At that point in time, I was just being selfish because I hated the fact that I couldn't do a damn thing. That's why." He paused and took a breath. "That's why I want to help others get strong enough to save themselves or others around them, because I can't. For someone like me, I think that's all I can really do."
He sat there in silence, contemplating what he had just heard. Truth be told, he didn't really see an issue with it. As long as he played his cards right then Alphonse would be secure in his position in the Survey Corps and be able to spread his influence to the cadets in training. Having higher quality soldiers would only benefit humanity in the long run. "Any particular reason why you chose the 104th?"
"I'm already familiar with them so I wouldn't have to reintroduce myself, well not from scratch anyway."
He nodded at him. "Very well, I will consider it Alphonse. Do you have anything else?"
Alphonse shook his head. "No sir." He stood up and saluted him before turning around and leaving.
He waited a moment after the door shut to let out a sigh. He didn't even bother asking the young soldier if he could even physically handle doing both jobs at once. He had a feeling that Alphonse could physically manage whatever was thrown at him.
Mentally, that was a different story entirely. He was no psychologist but he could make out Alphonse to be a rather damaged individual.
A fire that wiped out his town and being the sole survivor.
His penchant for trying to go out of his way to save people, despite all odds saying he could never accomplish such a thing.
His self doubt, seemingly unaware that he alone succeeded in completing the mission.
Plus whatever more was hiding underneath his cordial, if a bit sarcastic outgoing persona.
No one could come out of all that completely sane.
Everyone had their breaking point, some higher than others and from what he had seen in the past, the higher the tolerance the harder the fall.
Alphonse had a seemingly will of iron, dedication to duty and strength that, he knew, was unrivaled here. But what would happen when Alphonse reached his breaking point?
Iron was unyielding but when broken, shattered into a million pieces.
He reached over and began writing up his proposal to Premier Zachary. A lot of work needed to get done over the next few days, and needed the older officer on his side.
Thankfully, humanity had just fought the titans head on and came out the victors. The first victory the Survey Corps and by extension humanity as a whole has seen since the fall of Wall Maria two years ago.
No other branch of service could say that.
And it was all due to Alphonse.
A small smile cracked his lips at the most fortunate situation he found himself in.