The Dustwallow district was like almost all the others in Imp City: impoverished, decadent and therefore dangerous. Very few places could be considered relatively safe, and it wasn't because you would be safe there, but because they were neutral grounds, so to speak, where there was a tacit agreement to avoid screwing each other, even for a while, getting shot or stabbed if you do something to disturb the peace. Almost all of these places were food related, and 'Metis's Café' wasn't the exception; say what you want about imps as a race, that all are pugnacious, disorganized and so on, but even they want to enjoy their coffee with toast or muffins in fucking calm and peace.
Inside the humble local of old armchairs and wooden floor that apparently was formerly a betting house, at that time of the night with the usual customers gathered for the small celebration, there was an air between joyful and cautious at the same time; Joyful by the same spirit of the holidays, with some decorations alluding to the Krampus or the birth of the Antichrist on Earth... And at the same time by the new surprise guest, who moaned faintly, wrapped in a gray coat splattered with blood.
And why the cautious atmosphere? Because there were some bastards hanging around outside, who had just come from chasing two of the guests and regular customers of the place, who had just left to slaughter them with propriety now that they had their hands unoccupied, leaving the unexpected little guest they brought with them in the hands of the other customers.
"We'll have to give him something in the meantime, can anyone here by any chance breastfeed him? No? No one?" someone who was holding the little one asked, a female imp of thick build and short dark hair, ram horns and a certain Spanish or Caribbean accent when speaking, twisting her mouth at the sight of the guests-customers' negative answers.
"Hey Shade, I think I have a bag of breast milk. Let me warm it up." replied the store manager, a tall female imp with angular features and light hair that rose in soft curls atop corkscrew-like horns, who bent under the counter to fetch it.
"I'd hate to ask how the heck you got a bag of breast milk in there, Metis..."
"Ah, you know: I try to have as much of the ingredients as I can and a neighbor of mine gives it to me so she doesn't throw it away, she's a damn milking cow." Metis explained with a shrug, pulling a cold bag out of the fridge. "...More than one pervert has come in here to ask if I can serve them a coffee with milk from my breasts, like in that stupid internet meme." she added with a snort of disgust.
"...Eww, I'm going to lose my appetite." replied a female imp, also slightly heavier with dark grey hair, thin curled back horns, a scar over one eye and a hoodie of Wolf Yokai's skull, thus receiving the nickname 'Skully'; She took a sip of her coffee while leaning over the undaunted newborn, who was looking around as if trying to figure out where he was or trying to look for the two imps from earlier. "How small he is. Was he really in...?"
"Yep, they said they found him." another imp, lexus, replied; one of the few male imp in the coterie, who looked like a lanky version of one of the baby's 'saviors', with white hair and goat legs, only with white spots on his face. "...They'll tell us more when they're done with them, if they are, I guess."
Most nodded as they watched the little 'stowaway' suckle with the help of a thermos someone lent, adding a makeshift teat made from a surgical glove. Some of the guests made soft cooing or purring noises or tried to wipe his little yellow eyes from the dirt and blood on them; despite the stench he gave off, they kept touching the bumps that would be his horns or wiggling his little fingers to play a little with him.
...Outside, between gusts of icy wind, a couple of imps finished breaking the limbs of that small group of thugs, apparently survivors of the gang they exterminated before, either with axe's blows in Millie's case, or with gunshots in the face in Moxxie's case.
They hadn't realized they were being followed when they were several blocks away from that warehouse, at that moment concentrating on the little one that was moaning and crying against Millie's chest in an attempt to protect him as much as possible from the tremendous cold at that hour; It was a few blocks from their house when they heard the roars of motorcycles behind them, reacting in time to sneak around a corner just before the first shot hit them, upsetting them more than usual... Shootings weren't infrequent in that sector of the city, hell, many times the married couple was faced with assholes trying to mug them when they went out to the corner store, but now, being mindful of protecting a defenseless little one, it was clear that their sharp senses as experienced assassins were clearly disturbed.
...So it was a relief and a happy coincidence that they ran into some neighbors, lexus and Phantom, who asked them if they were on their way to the get-together at 'Metis's Café', with Moxxie and Millie urgently explaining that they were in trouble and should safeguard the child while they fought against their pursuers; lexus assured them that they would keep an eye over the little boy while Phantom took the baby to quickly bring him inside.
"I'll tell Metis to get the shotgun ready just in case." lexus told them before going inside as well.
While it was just said that that neighborhood was as dangerous as the rest of Imp City, neither Moxxie and Millie felt excessive concern for the little one; While some of their neighbors and acquaintances who frequented the coffee shop had jobs as 'questionable' as theirs (there being among them local drug dealers, hustlers and online sex workers, being very few exceptions such as Skully who worked in a bookstore and Metis herself; there were also hitmen, but none as experienced as Moxxie and Millie.), there was still a certain sense of belonging or guild consciousness in the hood, so to speak, of helping each other as much as possible to cope with living in the cesspool of shit that was that city while not screwing as much as possible with other neighbors... And that was quite useful at times like this.
Moxxie finished smashing out the brains of the last opponent with the butt of his pistol while he listened to the wild grunts of his wife as she disemboweled the asshole who had fired a bullet very close to her when she held the baby and almost grazed her shoulder... He couldn't help but feel that perhaps those old maternal feelings, buried underground so many months ago, were now resurfacing... And it was something that deep down it was because of that sad event in the past that still hurt her as much as it hurt him.
As he searched the pockets of the corpses to seize anything useful such as weapons, ammunition, money, and even the keys to one of the motorcycles that still worked (It would never hurt to increase the company's assets apart from their boss's grimy van...), the sharpshooter pondered: Now what would happen next? The mother was well and truly dead, and he didn't feel able to leave the infant in some hospital or orphanage, least of all when in Imp City, child welfare was as 'lovely' as in any Earth's third-world country, so that little boy would be safer, ironically, with two unrepentant and merciless assassins than in an institution... Still, Moxxie wasn't sure if it was a good idea to keep that little one, let alone with the lifestyle they were leading (...not to mention Blitzo, especially Blitzo.), he knew it would be very difficult to dissuade Millie from that possibility... He bit his lip, knowing that awkward talk would come sooner or later.
...Especially for the subject of that strange note he'd found on the gutted female imp in that bathroom.
Moxxie had explained it to her while they were walking quickly through the streets after leaving the gang's lair: When checking the corpse for any clue of her identity (and verifying in passing that it was indeed the mother of the baby), the white-haired imp had found between her stiff and bloody fingers a crumpled piece of paper that only said a place and a number:
"Naberius Cottage 311-452-478 "
None of the assassins couple were familiar with the name, much less their acquaintances and neighbors inside the 'Metis's Café' when they came in to retrieve the baby (who was finally sleeping peacefully after eating the creamy milk, still wrapped in Moxxie's gray coat.), replenish themselves with a strong cup of coffee and tell them briefly about the tragic find and the strange note. Millie tenderly rocked the little boy, thanking them all for keeping an eye on him while they dealt with those cocksuckers. Metis waved her hand, playing it down:
"You owe us some of those chocolate donuts you posted on your Voxtagram, Moxxie."
Moxxie couldn't help but laugh, "Consider it done, I still owe you civet coffee." Then his smile faded as he watched the little guy whimper for a moment in his wife's arms. "Does that name on the note ring a bell to anyone?"
"Nothing, but I know Naberius is one of those nobility bigwigs, I've seen that name sometimes in the bookstore, so it could be him or something related." replied Skully after looking on his phone. "Oh, and those digits is not a phone number, we checked. It looks like... a code, maybe."
"We could ask St... Well, you-know-who, he moves in inside those circles anyway, maybe he knows something. " Millie murmured to Moxxie, avoiding just in time to mention Stolas and have anyone overhear; It would be very scandalous for that poor dump to find out that their boss was sleeping with the Lord Protector of the city, stirring up gossip... More gossip than they were already doing about them: It wasn't rare for more than one in that cafeteria to have asked Moxxie and Millie at some point about how the fuck they managed to access the human world, always receiving vague or simply negative answers from the couple.
...Luckily they didn't insist too much, that was part of the unspoken neighborhood solidarity agreement not to fuck into each other's business.
"We'd better get home, this little pumpkin needs to be cleaned up." Millie said giving the baby's dirty little head a little kiss. "Thanks to ya'll, we're sorry about the surprise of this."
"Bah, like there isn't a good shooting every half hour." Shade replied raising her latte cup towards them. "What are you guys going to do about your pervert boss? I mean, he stalks you, doesn't he?"
Moxxie sighed amidst giggles from Millie, that wasn't a secret with that couple either; More than once the neighbors and people around the hood witnessed the white-haired imp's screams as he threw their boss out after catching him spying on them (again) from the window by the fire escape. Hilarious scenes for those onlookers, otherwise.
"...I've already resigned myself to the idea that he'll be in my kitchen eating the roast ham I was letting marinate."
...
Warm water was running inside the small tub where the little one was carefully deposited, with Millie diligently washing away the dirt, blood and other unpleasant bodily substances, revealing dark red skin and a couple of black spots on his little body. Moxxie rummaged through the medicine cabinet in the sink looking for hydrogen peroxide to keep the navel wound clean and a huge roll of bandages that could function as a makeshift diaper: Neither of them wanted to leave in case there were other gang members looking for them and they didn't want to leave the baby and each other alone... And because it was time for the awkward talk.
After drying him off and rubbing him with some baby oil they happened to have on the dresser when they wanted to get erotic massages and other kinky stuff in bed, Millie and Moxxie locked themselves in their bedroom with the little guest, sitting on the bed to watch him make little noises and move the huge amber eyes around the walls, but mostly on their faces, as if wanting to burn their features into his infant memory, maybe wondering who they were... Maybe believing that they were his mommy and daddy.
"Millie..."
"...Ah' know what you're going to say, Mox." his wife interrupted him in a whisper, placing a claw around the baby's little hand. "...And Ah' can't, we can't."
"This complicates the things, and you know it." Moxxie replied also in a low voice. "...And you know I don't just mean Blitz ramping up his stalking to the nth degree the moment he finds out."
"...We were goin' to do it just the same when... Well, ya know." Millie muttered closing her eyes, her voice trembled on the last sentence. Immediately Moxxie moved and wrapped his arms around her tenderly.
...That was still a complicated issue to deal with, and although it took them weeks to get over it, including having to get away from their boss, relatives and so on to make a sort of pilgrimage to the most inhospitable plains of their native Circle, among those places the hot springs hideaway where they had their honeymoon to make a sort of 'healing journey'... At the end it still hurt after more than six months of the event... And this little wretch was like a sad reminder of what they might have had.
"Moxxie..."
"I know, and I don't want to do it either, it's not his fault he came into this horrible world this way... The least we can do is give him a few quiet days while we figure out what happened and decide what we should do." Moxxie told her breaking away to look at her, with Millie nodding.
And the best way to find out what could have happened? By asking the client who ordered this hit, of course.
...But looking at his phone, both Millie and Moxxie noticed strangely that they hadn't received a reply, not even the text message Moxxie had sent to letting him know the hit was done was marked as 'seen' ...And it had been over three hours since then.
The sound of a gurgling sound brought them out of their thoughts, causing them to look down and finding his eyes locked on them. Both Millie and Moxxie were amazed at what they see, eyes crinkling as he giggles, stretching his chubby little hands out towards them, as if asking to be held; Moxxie picks him up and pulled him close to his face, letting the baby touch it, the impling then letting out a coo before grabbing a white lock of the adult imp's hair and tugging hard. ...He was so small, his yellow eyes shining so sweetly and innocently, both concepts that in Hell were nothing more than oxymoron and contradictions, reminding the couple of their own photos of both of them as babies in some of the albums in the living room; Husband and wife looked at each other, both with a smile and feeling something warm bubbling inside them, pushing away any sad or worried thoughts.
"Let's set up a crib for him with the pillows." Moxxie muttered placing the baby on the bed, starting to grab pillows and some of Millie's stuffed toys that he gifted her in several dates in the past, including her 'Thing' plushie to create a square to put him in the middle so he wouldn't move, Millie nodded to head to the kitchen and try to recreate breast milk in some VoxTube recipe...
"...HOLY FUCKING SHIT, IS THAT A BABY?!"
"BLITZO, WHAT THE FUCK YOU'RE DOING HERE!"
"Moxxie, Blitzo, shut up, yar're gonna piss off the baby...!"
...Too late: The little boy burst into tears at the exchange of shouting and swearing.
...
After Millie threatened to both to kick them out cold outside if they didn't calm down, both Moxxie and Blitzo were sitting in the living room at Millie's request as she soothed the little one from the scare, Blitzo asking where the fuck they got the kid from, while Moxxie, with an angry expression and folded arms, replied dryly that they found him at the target's hideout. When the southern female imp entered the room carrying the now back to sleep baby, Blitzo snorted:
"Well this complicates things more than usual." he mumbled pulling a cigarette out of his pocket to light it with a snap of his fingers, but Moxxie knocked it out of his mouth with a flick of his tail.
"You won't smoke in my house, let alone with a baby here." Moxxie hissed. Blitz grimaced.
"Geez, what's gotten into you two now? It's not like if you're going to keep it or anything..." Blitzo was mute as he saw the strange look the married imps gave each other. "Wait, wait: Are you pretending to...?" ...And then hearts formed in Blitzo's eyes as he squeezed his own cheeks together, gasping. "CAN I BE THE HELLFATHER?! Or can I be the fun uncle! Please, pretty please...!"
"Sir, we haven't decided anything yet, this is all too sudden." Moxxie interrupted him, sighing then looking at the baby with a strange expression that the former circus imp didn't miss as he snorted.
"Don't be stupid, Mox. You got a damn opportunity like a fucking Heckmas miracle, don't go wasting it now by overthinking it, sometimes the best things are done impulsively and without thinking about the consequences!"
"...Like everything you do." Moxxie pointed out to him crudely. "By the way, what are you doing here? It's a full moon today."
"Yeah Blitz, usually Prince Stolas has ya chained to his bed all night." Millie seconded, still cradling the impling. "Did somethin' come up with his wife?"
"Nah, that snob bitch is always absent that day to go off with her on-duty lover. Stolas' butler, Reginald, explained it to me in the first month there." Blitzo replied with a shrug. "I asked Stolas for a moment to go pick you up at that shitty coffee shop you usually go to, but the weirdos there told me you already went home early with a baby and I was like, 'Shit, did I have wax in my ears or did they just say they went home with a baby?' and I came running to check, thinking you found another nasty queef as a pet (1) and no, it's a real fucking baby!"
"...And why did you go looking for us, sir?" Moxxie replied, taking the baby from his wife's arms.
"To advise you, since you didn't realize, you dumb lovebirds, that the client doesn't answer and therefore has not paid us!"
"Yes, we also noticed, he never answered the message." Millie answered uneasily, but at the same time with a shrug. "Who knows, maybe he fell asleep or somethin'..."
"Oh Mills, when it comes to money (MY money… Ok, fine, our money, stop staring at me like that, Mox…), I'm VERY insistent, we don't do charity for a poor idiot who had his shit stolen, so I asked him to Stolas to track his phone with his resources... "
"And?"
Blitz's expression, out of nowhere, hardened: "...He's gone."
...
They had to take the impling with them in the I.M.P. van, with Millie attaching him to her chest with a piece of sheet in a sort of makeshift baby carrier, with Blitz driving reasonably and with his radio set to low reluctantly after much urging from the couple, through the still busy streets to a few blocks further on, among a series of dilapidated houses and buildings.
As he drove, the taller imp glanced out of the corner of his eye at his employees in the back seat, clinging strangely affectionately to the unknown baby as if it were truly their child... Blitzo had seen his fantasy of being the Mini M&M's 'honorary uncle' go down to shit months ago, having been as well forced to put the company's activities on standby until the couple were recovered... And now it was as if those sad weeks had never existed and everything had followed the natural course until this moment arrived... It was both strange and painful at the same time.
Blitzo dispelled his thoughts as he found himself back in the same apartment building he found after having Stolas order his spies to trace the number after unsuccessful calls. The door was on broken hinges and it was only a turn of the knob to open it, letting the dynamic duo go in first, Millie pressing the impling against herself while Moxxie went in front with gun at the ready.
...Everything was a mess: the walls were stained with blood, the few rickety pieces of furniture were overturned... Everything was topsy-turvy, as if there had been a robbery or a surprise attack and no one had survived... But despite the blood on the walls and furniture, there wasn't a dead body anywhere in that dining room or the other room that doubled as a bedroom, judging by the disheveled bed and the pile of fixtures in the dresser and bathroom… On the dresser was a switched-on cell phone which, upon examination, Moxxie and Millie found to their dismay was the client's, Moxxie's and Blitzo's text messages, as well as the latter's missed calls, were listed.
"I'll take this to Stolas and see if his men can look for anything. And then Loonie will come sniff around, she can't now because she has a hangover." Blitzo said putting the phone back in his pocket. At that moment the impling began to moan restlessly, instantly Moxxie and Millie making cooing noises to quiet him. 'Fuck me, this is cute as fuck' the tall imp thought to his chagrin. "Since he'll be attached to you guys like a damn tick these days, will you at least give him a name?"
The married couple looked at each other for a moment and then at the lump curled up on Millie's chest, who had calmed down again; The same warm feeling inside them bubbled up again, Moxxie reached out a claw and stroked the little head.
"...Morrie."
Blitz blinked and rolled his eyes, but sketched a smile. "...Wow, how original, you guys."
Notes:
(1) Queef: Giant fly that was seen in the last seconds of the episode "Loo Loo Land" (Yes, the one that dragged an unconscious Millie off camera.)
Well, I added some of the commenters and proud members of the M&M Simp Crew of Archive of Our Own! And yes, 'Dustwallow' (District): I'm a huge Warcraft geek, tee hee.