AN: thank you to everyone who reviewed enjoyed. now the moment you've all been waiting for

"I, I loved you in spite of, Deep fears that the world would divide us, So, baby, can we dance, Oh, through an avalanche? And say, say that we got it, I'm a mess, but I'm the mess that you wanted, Oh, 'cause it's gravity," Dancing With Our Hands Tied – Taylor Swift

...

In that dark truck, MJ decided that she was going to punch Peter where it would hurt.

At first, the thought about killing him figuratively: throttling him, screaming at him, throwing a dart at his face. But she figured that a hit to the balls would be much more effective. Even a boy with spider-level healing and strength would have to gasp when that area was targeted.

Her anger continued to swell as he talked. She slowly put the pieces together throughout the story. Everything seemed to check out–even Spider-man's appearance at Liz's party a few years ago. God, he fought that girl's dad?

MJ struggled between her sympathy for the poor kid and her anger toward him. Peter was a certified asshole, no doubt, for not telling her or Ned anything or considering the consequences of his actions. Yet, he carried a lot of shit on his own over the past few months, including his only family dying, completely living on his own, and losing those he loved. It took a second to realize that was her.

Peter begged for forgiveness. He clasped his hands and walked close to her. "MJ, I swear, I thought I was protecting you guys. Your head was healing and I thought that meant everything else was too. I mean, you don't remember what it was like when Mysterio doxed me and-"

"You're right. I don't. Do you realize that means I don't remember why my parents used to be so worried about me? Why I still hide from cameras after everything that's happened? I know it was traumatic for you, Peter. But imagine if half of the memories of your trauma were gone, and you were left with feelings and fears alone. How would that feel?"

MJ knew she sounded a little harsh. But she was allowed to feel angry. At that moment, it was just them, the strawberries, and the napkins. She wasn't even thinking about how cool it was that her plan worked. All she could focus on were the lost months–time she spent drifting and floating as if her mind was still with an erased Peter Parker and her body was in the world he returned to.

Peter deflated. "I'm sorry." His voice broke. "I thought... Well, I thought you might be happier without me."

"Peter," MJ took a deep breath to steady herself, "I was not happy. But I was also living in an illusion. Plus," MJ's voice rose again, "if you'd said something earlier, Ned and I could've helped! Even just if you were Spider-man."

That made Peter think. He scratched the back of his head "Oh," he said. "Honestly, I was coping. Not in the best way, but I was okay. As long as you were okay." His eyes were soft when they met hers. MJ cursed under her breath.

"Were you ever planning on telling us?"

"Yes. Only because I couldn't go back on my old promise."

"But you did. You waited!"

"You also said, right before I disappeared, you'd figure it out. I'm not surprised that you did."

MJ looked smug, but tears were falling down her face. Peter's eyes watered and a single tear fell. She took his hand.

"Can we have a fresh start?" Peter asked her, then with wide eyes, stuttered, "only uh, if you want to of course, um-"

"Peter?" MJ smacked him upside the head lightly. "Duh? Have you not learned anything in the last 30 minutes?"

Peter laughed dryly. "Guess not. Sorry, I'm still in a guilty mindset. It'll go away."

They sat in silence for a few minutes while MJ's thoughts wandered. What if he was right? Crime rings were never good. But they'll never dox them again. So fine? Okay. What do I do now? Date him all over again? I only remember feelings.

MJ took a deep breath. She wasn't used to listening to her heart instead of her brain, and after convincing herself that this plan was to figure herself out, she wasn't sure what to do. She was once Spider-man and Peter Parker's girlfriend, who faced all of the risks involved and seemed to love him unconditionally. Maybe in a different world, she could've stayed that way forever.

"You're going away for college." Peter's voice brought her out of her thoughts.

"I am."

"Is it going to be hard on you if we're together?"

"I don't know Peter. I don't even remember everything we went through or the experiences we had. And all of this came from you. It's hard to fully believe it." Peter nodded as she spoke. "But, it sounds like I really was in it for you. And if a mob of paparazzi and near-death experiences didn't break us, I don't think a hundred miles would either." MJ gave him a small smile. She noticed Peter beginning to grin, then clarified. "That would take time."

"I know, I know. I just," he grinned at her, and MJ was overwhelmed by the longing and love in his eyes, "I either thought you'd hate me or never even notice."

"Maybe you're the one who doesn't remember well." MJ shoved him casually. Peter's laugh made her heart feel light. She couldn't remember the last time she felt that way, but she imagined that it was before the spell.

"All I know is that I love you." Again, MJ was struck by Peter's blatant confession. The playful atmosphere turned tense and thick–the delicate emotions were palpable. "I love you and I know that normal isn't something you'll ever have."

"Who gives a shit? Normal hasn't existed in like ten years."

"Fine, as close to it as possible. If you're with me, that's impossible."

"Okay, wait Peter. I'm not going to be your girlfriend like today. No. We're in a diner truck at 2 A.M. and you just told me about your existence."

Peter turned red. "Friends first. Who gives a fuck if its abnormal. I know some pretty bomb first-aid."

"Yeah, I know." His breathing was heavy and ragged. "Okay. Friends."

For the first time since they got in the truck, MJ turned to fully face Peter. Under the dim yellow lightbulb, with his back against a box of flour, he looked like an exhausted soldier. Like someone who just returned from war. (Not that she would ever approve of the US military-industrial complex) MJ noticed how young he looked though and how worn he was. There were scars on his face, and his brown eyes were wide and gazing on a thousand things at once. A boy who experienced more than most seniors could ever handle.

MJ got Deja Vu. She was taken back to a time she shouldn't have been able to remember: when Peter returned from the fight with Mysterio on the London Bridge. She didn't know how she knew that moment, but she was certain.

Without thinking, she fiddled with her necklace. "You know, I never understood why this broken black dahlia necklace was so important to me. I just knew that I couldn't take it off." MJ traced a tear down his cheek, finding that his cheekbones were prominent and his face gaunt. "I also knew that I had been in love. Just not with whom. The confusion was driving me insane but, I guess part of that was you. I admired you so much, then my role model was gone."

Peter opened his mouth, but MJ held her hand to his lips. "We were like Romeo and Juliet on steroids and without the death. Replace all the politics with magic and aliens. But, someday, I think we can do it. I wouldn't love just anyone like I loved you."

MJ was getting used to being so open with this kid. She was always shocked at how honest she was. Whenever she opened her mouth, it was like his heart pulled the words right out of her.

"It would be dangerous," Peter warned. "I'd be selfish to say yes."

"Peter, everyone deserves to be a little selfish sometimes."

"Even as friends, it would be dangerous."

"So? I'm dangerous."

"That you are. So, what do you say?"

"I say, we tell Ned and see if you survive that."

"Hm. What after that?"

"We do the impossible. Try to be normal."

Peter seemed to consider that. In the light of the truck, the two of them could've easily been teens hiding out to cause mischief or eat everything inside. But nope, they were debating the memory of the world.

"Can I?" Peter gestured to his raised arm. Oh. MJ didn't trust herself to speak, so she nodded.

With Peter's arm around her, her body relaxed. Her shoulders un-tensed, her eyebrows un-furrowed. She focused on the sounds around them–crickets and police cars.

"Shit, Peter!" MJ jumped up. "It's like 2 something and the produce needs to get put away. Oh my god, I have to go home!"

MJ scrambled to get her bag and her phone.

Peter's hand stopped her. "Woah, woah. Okay. You go home, I'll handle the produce."

"Do you even know where it goes?"

"Uh, I'll figure it out."

Her adrenaline melted away as she saw Peter's ridiculous grin.

"You're insufferable."

"We're best friends already!"

"Fine. Just don't mess anything up."

"I'll try not to. I would take you home too but that might be suspicious."

MJ scoffed. "I can take care of myself."

Peter nodded. "I haven't forgotten."

…

As MJ walked home, she noticed her fingers tingling from when they held hands. It was the "Spider-man Sparks" (TM) all over again.

She could roll her eyes at feelings and crushes and love all she wanted to. But truthfully, when it was solid–like you'd die for someone solid and remember them across magic solid and even match on an intellectual level solid–it felt like home. She could act as snarky and confident as she wanted, but at the end of the day, she wanted to be more than a nerd. She wanted a friend, and she wanted to feel like she was more than her brains. She wanted somewhere where she could be everything she was: smart, snarky, witty, sarcastic, hard to read.

She wouldn't mind having someone who understood that.