Chapter 4:

Subaru's eyes shot open, and he sat up in his bed, gasping for air, his blankets fell off and onto the floor. His hands shook as he raised them and covered his face with them, his head still felt like it was pounding., Sweat dripped down his face. It quickly dawned on him as to what happened. Tears sprung up in the corners of his eyes. "Why? Why…?"

He had died and had Returned by Death.

He flopped his head back, letting the back of it—where phantom pain still pulsed—bang against the wall. He groaned as a few tears slipped down his face. He stayed like that for a moment, before he took a shaky breath and pulled his head back up, wiping away his tears on his sleeves.

He had to act. The most important piece of information right now would be learning the current date, as then he could move on to how to stop this attack.

He stood up, just as he had done seemingly just a few minutes ago, and walked over towards his window. He pulled open the curtains and sighed as he stared out towards the scenery, it was morning. His eyes misted over as he let himself get consumed by what just happened. He shook his head and pushed the need to scream down.

He changed into his regular clothes and took a deep breath before opening the door. He stepped out into the hallway and walked down it, walking into the open room where both the kitchen and living room were. Chills ran up his spine as he glanced at the front door.

Clement was in the living room, a book open in his hand as usual. Subaru took another breath, and said, "Good Morning." Clement glanced at Subaru and nodded, "Good Morning. How are you?"

"I… could be better. I had a… weird dream last night."

"Ah, yeah. Well, at least it was only a dream."

Subaru gulped, "Yeah."

Subaru absentmindedly glanced at the front door, before asking, "Hey, Clement, what's today's date?"

"Huh? Today is the… eighteenth. Why?"

Subaru froze for just a moment. The eighteenth… it had just been the 21st. Meaning he had… all of today, tomorrow, the day after, then all of the twenty-first before the attack happened that night. So four full days.

Subaru sucked in a breath, "No real reason, just wondering."

Clement nodded. "I'll start cooking, then." The brown-haired man stood up and went over to the kitchen. Subaru sat down in one of the chairs in the living room. He closed his eyes and began thinking.

Four days. He had no idea how strong the attacker was, or even how many there could be. He had no way of identifying them either because it had been too dark to see much. Clement probably wasn't of too much use in a fight… He hadn't done much against Hans. Subaru searched his mind for ideas.

I could ask Clement to introduce me to that spiritualist… yeah. I'll do that.

He could become stronger himself. Then he wouldn't have to include anyone else who could get hurt. He thought of Selena, who had brushed against death after being cut open by Hans. Luckily she had survived, though. His mind also came to Clement, who could've been hurt much worse if Subaru hadn't pushed him away from the explosion back during the fight against Hans.

I'll do all of this myself. No one else has to get hurt.

He thought of everyone who had died indirectly because of him during his loops.

He bit his lip, thinking about all of this.

"No one else has to put themself in danger." He said to himself.

Subaru stood up, determining himself to solve this alone. He walked over towards the kitchen. "Hey, Clement, I think I have a good affinity with spirits. Do you know anyone who could teach me more about becoming a spiritualist?"

"Uhm, yeah." Clement stepped away from the stove where he had been cooking, "There's the Great Spiritualist Amai in this town. He's willing to take on pupils as long as they can pay."

Clement continued as Subaru nodded, "But when did you find out that you have a good affinity with spirits?"

"A few days ago. A minor spirit appeared to me and seemed really affectionate. It even let me touch it."

"Wow… My other question is, well, why? I mean, life is pretty peaceful right now."

Subaru absentmindedly looked around while saying, "After what happened with Hans I want to be more prepared if anything else happens. Think of it as a safety precaution."

Clement nodded. "Alright, I'll bring you to him sometime soon."

"Could we go today?"

"Eh? I mean… I suppose we could." Especially given the serious look in your eyes right now. Clement kept that last bit to himself.

"Alright, good."

Subaru returned to the living room. That was the biggest of the things he had to take care of immediately.

He was still tense as he sat back down. If he couldn't become a good enough spiritualist in this loop then he'd just have to keep training next loop. A thought appeared in Subaru's mind. Couldn't I use Return by Death to become an amazing spiritualist? Or use it to become great at anything I wanted?

Subaru was quick to push those thoughts down. He swore that he wouldn't abuse Return by Death to become good at something unless it was absolutely necessary.

The two ate, though Subaru didn't have much of an appetite. Shortly after they were walking down the street, chilly air bit at their exposed skin. They were heading to their stand. After that, they were going to head to Amai.

The day went by quickly and as per usual. They sold a lot of mayonnaise and other things as they usually did. Subaru occasionally had to push away bad memories throughout the day and focused himself entirely on his work.

The two ate lunch and closed up shop around the time the Fire Bell rang, which was roughly noon. After that, they made their way to Amai. They walked in silence. Clement, with his knack for figuring out people's emotions, was pretty sure Subaru was nervous.

After a while of walking, they approached a lone spire hidden away in the outskirts of the town. It was pretty close to the city's wall. They stepped up to the door. Clement gave Subaru a glance before knocking on it. After a few moments, an old man with a short white beard opened it. He wore a long blue robe. The old man spoke, his voice quiet and rough, weathered by his age, "What do you need?"

Subaru spoke up, "I want you to train me in the spirit arts."

The old man eyed him, "Mmm…" He closed his eyes and checked the man's spiritual affinity. "Sure. I'll expect compensation, though."

Clement and Subaru nodded, Clement stepped forward, and took out a bag of coins, the two had decided that Clement would pay upfront, then Subaru would pay Clement back later on.

The two discussed the price while Subaru fell back into his thoughts. With this, Subaru could start gaining strength. Hopefully, he could get strong enough to hold the attacker off.

Subaru and Amai sat opposite each other. Warm cups of tea sat on the table between them. They were in the uppermost room of the spire, where the tall walls of the room slanted inward from the pointed roof.

Amai narrowed his eyes as he said, "A good spirit affinity… Well. Do you have any spirits contracted?"

Subaru shook his head, "No, sir."

"Do you have any spirits that you're interested in contracting with?"

"Uhm," Subaru thought of the small blue spirit, "There's this one spirit… Though I don't know where or how to find it."

"Mm. Spirits tend to stay around the same area. We'll probably find it if we go back to where you originally met it."

Subaru nodded, "Alright."

Not long after that, the two were in the park where Subaru had met the Spirit last loop. Contracting a spirit today was a very important part of Subaru's plan.

Subaru led Amai towards the spot where the Spirit had shown itself last loop. After not too long, a small blue light floated towards him. "Ah, there it is."

Amai observed the spirit. Then he said, "First you should communicate with it. Spirits don't understand our language well, so you can only communicate with basic thoughts, or emotions until they pick up on the basics of language."

Subaru nodded.

"Focus on the spirit and your chosen thought or emotion to send it to the spirit."

Subaru took a deep breath and focused on the small light in front of him. Then, he focused on a simple thought, just a "Hello." After a few moments, he felt as if the spirit received the thought. A couple of moments later it sent back a mixture of things that all seemed to culminate into a hello.

"Hm, people usually struggle with that at first. Try asking it to form a temporary contract with you, it's a contract that isn't as nearly permanent as normal, and can easily be broken by either side. It's what people usually start with."

Subaru returned his attention to the spirit. He sent over a series of thoughts, all of which were trying to communicate that he wants a temporary contract. The spirit seemed to be mulling it over for a moment before a strange feeling bubbled up inside of Subaru. The spirit glowed brighter as the feeling slowly vanished.

"Was... that the contract forming?"

Amai nodded, "It seems to have taken a liking towards you. Temporary contracts aren't as strong as true contracts, so it'll be a little harder to cast strong spells."

Subaru nodded. So I'll also need a true contract with this spirit…

Subaru gave the spirit a small smile, it was the first smile he had made since he had Returned by Death.

Subaru asked, "Do spirits have names?"

"Most do not. A lot of people name their spirits, though."

Subaru gazed at the spirit, before asking, "Oh, yeah, what magical affinity is this spirit?"

Subaru had read about these over this past month. Every person and spirit had an affinity for a type of magic. There were six kinds: Fire, Earth, Water, Wind, Yin, and Yang.

"This spirit has an affinity for water."

Subaru nodded. If he remembered water also included the control of life, meaning you could learn healing magic with it.

That was all they did for the day. Amai said Subaru and his spirit had to bond more before they could continue. Subaru was a little disappointed, but he agreed and returned home. While walking, he talked with the spirit. Its thoughts were soft and gentle. He also decided to name it Ceres, after the dwarf planet. Ceres seemed to be a female, also. She was pretty talkative. She didn't know much about the world and was really curious about everything.

The two returned home. Clement was sitting on the couch reading a book as usual. Ceres hid behind Subaru's shoulder.

"Yo, Clement."

"Welcome back, Subaru." The white-haired man put his book to the side and stood up, as he continued speaking, "How was it?"

"It went well, I didn't learn much, though. I made a temporary contract with this spirit. Her name's Ceres." He stepped to the side, revealing the small blue orb. The spirit panicked as Clement's eyes landed on her. She shot to the side, ducking behind Subaru, and stopped manifesting a physical form.

Subaru grinned. "She's a little shy."

Clement nodded, saying, "I hope we can become friends."

Subaru nodded as he sent conveyed Clement's feelings towards the invisible spirit. It replied with uneasiness.

"I'm sure you two will soon enough."

I'll do my best to let that happen in this loop. I'll stop the attacker and let Clement and Ceres become friends.

Subaru steeled his will. Clement looked a little confused. It was probably because Subaru's sudden seriousness was showing on his face. Subaru relaxed his face and gave a small smile.

Subaru lay in bed. He now had three days until the attack. He ran through what he had done today in his mind. He had thought through the minimal details of the attack, had Clement bring him to Amai, and then he contracted with Ceres.

It wasn't much, considering he had to become a decent spiritualist before the attack. He turned his thoughts towards Ceres. She didn't seem like she'd be too good with fighting, but he trusted her. He felt back about sucking her into such a situation. It was still better than if he were to bring Clement into this, as Clement could actually die if Subaru messed up.

He accidentally directed some of his guilt towards her. A blue orb manifested in front of him. She asked, [Sad?]

Subaru shook his head. [It's nothing.] Ceres didn't seem convinced, but she began dematerializing. She sent one last thought, [Goodnight.]

[Yeah, goodnight.]

Subaru closed his eyes. Three days… gotta… keep going.

He drifted into sleep.