I do not own Harry Potter, the Wizarding World, or any canon characters.

The Family that Chooses You

Chapter 32 – Hermionian Measures

Hermione looked around the busy street. This was not her first visit to Diagon Alley, nor was it her first time seeing all these wizards and witches walking about. She was used to magic, so she thought. More used to it anyways. She no longer flinched at shows of magic, was more prepared for sudden dazzling lights and strange noises. She liked writing with ink and quill, though she still thought pens and pencils were a lot easier and more convenient. Robes were rather comfortable and handy with all the pockets if somewhat less variety in style.

However, she did not feel like she belonged there. In the magical world. She felt awkward, like a sore thumb that stuck out. It was not just how she looked either, how her bushy hair liked to stick out. She knew she physically stuck out too. She walked differently, talked differently.

She also felt differently.

In the last year, she felt so far apart from those born into magical families. Even those with a magical parent acted very differently from Muggle-borns. They took things for granted that those without any magical parentage did not. They accepted things more readily. They seemed to take to it more easily.

Those from Pure-blood families were even worse. They spoke of traditions and rules that they all seemed to know and held it over the heads of those that did not. Those kids acted like they were better than any and everyone else. They acted in a completely different way, a way that set Hermione's teeth on edge.

Literally in this case. At her exam when she came home, her parents commented that she was grinding her teeth again, and worse than before.

Hermione had tried to prepare herself by reading as many books as she could get her hands on. She read about magical history, about Hogwarts, about anything related to the Wizarding World. She treated it like she did anything before, relying on books and knowledge to be ready.

It turns out that knowing things is not the same as being prepared for them.

It was not that she was incompetent. Her grades were top notch and she was accomplished at spell casting. She did exceedingly well.

It also turns out that people in the Wizarding World resented some people for their hard work like people did in the Muggle world.

She sighed. She also knew it was not just that. It was her demeanor that also set most people off. She had enough self-awareness to recognize it. People were put off by how upfront she was, how hungry for knowledge she was. Most did not like how rigid her thinking was, how she was proud of who she was.

Just like in the Muggle world, she had problems with friends in the Wizarding World. As in she really did not have any. Even the few other Muggle-borns did not like her all that much and she had hoped they could bond over similar circumstances.

So she took her friendship with Harry and Ron very seriously.

Harry was still a mystery to her. He was, according to all the books written about him, a quintessential wizard. He was the Boy-Who-Lived, the one who defeated You-Know-Who as a baby. He had stopped the Wizarding War in Britain without a wand. Many claimed he was the ideal of magic: strong, from a magical family, oddly demure because of the lack of celebrity as he grew up.

When Hermione learned that he would be going to Hogwarts at the same time she was, she was incredibly excited. She could not wait to meet the boy she read so much about.

To say she was surprised when they met was an utter understatement.

He was nothing the books said he was or would be. He was small, incredibly small. He was painfully shy, even more introverted than her, which was saying something. He was nervous, hesitant, unwilling to gather attention. He was the opposite of everything the books said he would or should be.

To her, it was almost like finding a kindred soul. Someone who stood out terribly and did not fit in at all. She felt far closer to Harry because of it.

After the Troll Incident, Hermione grew closer to Harry and Ron. She still had her issues with Ron but he was tolerable most days and a good friend on others. He was not Harry however, obviously, in many ways. Harry had confessed to her one day that they had accidentally locked the troll in with her.

After being, what she considered to be suitably horrified, she was touched. Harry had confessed to her a mistake he had made. Not only that, he had come back to help her. So she ignored the part that it was technically his fault she was in danger.

Well, his and Ron's fault. More Ron's fault actually, for you could argue she was only crying in the bathroom because of him.

As they became closer friends during the year, Hermione began to think of more questions, questions that she did not know how to ask. They were not the simple mundane questions one asks of a new friend. What's your favorite color? What's your favorite food? Favorite book? Time of day?

They were much more invasive questions. Why are you so small? Why did you barely eat anything despite always looking so hungry? Why do you avoid eye contact and are incredibly nervous around people?

Why does the Quidditch Team treat you like you're so fragile?

Why are you so close to them and not me?

She hated that she thought that last question. She knew she had no right asking it. He was friends with them before her technically. It stands to reason why he acted so differently with them. That was the only reason he was different around them. Not that they were older than her. Not that they were prettier than her, more mature.

No, that was certainly not the reason.

After all, she had been one of the ones that accompanied Harry at the end of the year on their incredibly dangerous experience. She was the one that helped him through all those tasks and traps. Not the team. She showed that he could rely on her.

She saw how brave he was, not them.

An irritated sigh escaped her as she leaned into the corner of the building. She hated feeling this way. She did not even truly know why she felt so irritated. She would never begrudge Harry for having friends. Goodness knows he certainly needs them and deserves them.

She was worried that she could not provide enough for their friendship. She prided herself on her great marks and her homework skills. She helped Harry a lot with his work but he also worked with the older girls a lot too. They would know more than her, being older of course, so she worried that she could not help him as much as they did.

It also vexed her when she learned things from them tangentially from looking over Harry's work after the face. It should not have, she knew, again since they were older. It still vexed her however.

Harry seemed like he enjoyed spending time with her and Ron. He did spend a lot of his free time with them. However, she noticed whenever he really needed something he went to the team first, specifically to Katie and Angelina. He also hugged them a lot, cuddled with them even. It felt like they could provide more than she could.

Hermione disliked feeling inadequate.

Her mother would tell her that she was being silly. That friends are friends for different reasons and there is nothing wrong with someone relying on one friend for one reason and on another for another reason.

That was why Hermione had not talked to her mother yet about her feelings. She had no desire to be called silly.

This summer had been nerve wracking. She was so excited to have a pen pal, someone to send letters to. She and Harry had promised to write often. So during the first few weeks of the Summer, she had been worried. For a brief time, she had thought that Harry had lied to her, that he only said he would to placate her.

Only for a moment though, she knew Harry would never do that.

It was not until later, after she sent Ron a message with her worries, that Ron had shared them. After that, she had breathed a sigh of relief when she received messages from both boys. Ron told her that he and the twins had gone to get him, in an extremely illegal fashion, that sadly sounded utterly necessary. Harry's message was one of apology. Apparently, all his mail had been blocked.

They had exchanged more letters since and while she was glad for the correspondence, she was worried. He did not talk about many things, dodging her questions or skillfully saying as little as possible while changing the subject. Then she heard of Katie and Angelina's visit and she got rather jealous.

Once again she was not there when he needed her. She was not relied upon.

Hermione hated feeling inadequate.

When Harry mentioned he and the Weasleys were going to Diagon Alley that day to buy their school things, she managed to come on the same day. She wanted to see him, and the Weasleys, at least once before school started. She wanted to hear from him directly, not just from his words on parchment.

Thinking all of this all at once, trying to parse out the feelings they inspired, made her feel rather silly. Something she had been trying to avoid.

"Hermione!"

She looked up and she smiled as she recognized the boy running up to her. His black hair was the same: messy and untamable. His scar peeked out from locks carefully pulled to hide it. His glasses were oddly whole and unbroken.

Her smile faded ever so slightly as more of him came into view. He was still rather small. He looked like someone recovering from a long illness. He walked with curled shoulders, as if he tried to look unimpressive and unassuming in plain sight. Something she noticed at the beginning of the last school year. He had done less of it as the school year went on and it was practically gone by the end.

Now it had returned in full force.

She forced the unwelcome thought down and she instead tried to smile without reservation at him. "It's so good to see you!" she said sincerely.

"Same!" Harry replied happily. After a moment's hesitation he opened his arms slightly.

Surprised but immensely gratified, she gave him a hug. She still remembered the first time she tried to hug him. He had gone stiff as a board and looked panicked. She had felt terrible and let him go. He tried to stammer an apology but she brushed it away despite feeling awful about it. After that she never tried again despite wanting to.

Another reason she felt a little resentment at Katie and Angelina she supposed. They never seemed to have any trouble hugging Harry and Angelina would even pull him to her. Then again, if Harry now is open to hugs and the like because of them she should not be too upset at them.

Unfortunately.

They broke apart and looked at each other a bit awkwardly. "You look well," she said slightly untruthfully.

"I feel much better since staying at the Burrow," Harry said earnestly.

Hermione winced internally. If he looked better now after spending days at the Burrow, he must have looked awful when he first arrived. "How did you get here?"

"We went by Floo. You travel through fireplaces. It's really weird."

"That sounds wonderful," Hermione said with a touch of envy.

Harry shook his head. "It's really not. You get really dizzy and get covered in soot and ash. I almost went to the wrong place because I said the destination a little garbled. Thankfully Percy grabbed me before I stepped in or else who knows where I would've gone."

"That does sound rather unpleasant," Hermione said. She looked around but saw none of the Weasleys. "Where are they by the way?"

"We all went to Gringotts and decided to split up for a bit. We'll meet back at the bookstore at the end. I hadn't seen you at all yet so wanted to spend some time with you."

"Oh." Her cheeks reddened slightly. "Just you and me?"

"If that's okay." Harry smiled sheepishly. "Ron was going to come but Mrs. Weasley wanted to make sure he got the right robes so she took him with her first with Ginny. I can see if someone else will-"

"No no," she interrupted. "I'm perfectly fine tolerating you on my own."

He grinned. "That's a relief. I'll get us some ice cream to be more tolerable."

She definitely blushed. "Harry, I was kidding."

"I'm not. I really want ice cream. Hopefully you do too 'cause otherwise I'd look terrible eating some without you." A dark look filled his eyes. "Like my cousin used to do."

"No, I mean, I'd love some. Thank you for being so kind." She had seen that look before. She hated seeing Harry look that way. She tried to smile. "Ice cream makes everything better."

"It really does," he agreed, the dark look dissolving.

After getting their ice cream, the pair walked about buying what they needed. Hermione asked careful questions about Harry's Summer. She always felt uncomfortable during these types of conversations. She knew there was always something unsaid, something that did not feel right. That further explanation was needed but she did not want to ask and he did not want to tell.

She always felt disquieted after.

However, Harry did happily share everything about the Burrow and what they did there. He did mention Dobby and the reason why he never replied to any of her attempts at contacting him.

"That's curious," she mused. "I wonder why Dobby did that, aside from his strange cryptic warning."

Harry shrugged, as if unconcerned.

"Doesn't it bother you not knowing why?"

He smiled weakly. "I've stopped asking why some things happen Hermione. It's better that way."

She felt disquieted again.

Ron eventually joined them and they finished their shopping before meeting the others at the bookstore. Then after some gushing over Gilderoy Lockheart, from her since Ron and Harry did not join in, and some shock at a spectacular row between Arthur and Lucius Malfoy that ended in a public brawl of all things, they found themselves at the Leaky Cauldron about to part ways.

"It was good seeing you Harry," she said. She wished they could have spent more time together.

"It's only about a week more before we head back to school together," he replied.

"Can't wait," she said. She opened her arms like he did earlier that day and was gratified when he did not hesitate at all.

"So that's Harry then?" Jean asked as they drove away from the Leaky Cauldron.

Hermione gave her a look. "I did introduce him to you."

David Granger, Hermione's father, snorted gently. "No need for that," he scolded gently. "He was just, not what we were expecting."

She felt bad from the mild reproof and from what she imagined was coming. "What were you expecting?"

"Well from what you told us, we were thinking of a shy and introverted boy that was smart and kind. Much like a male version of you really. Perhaps a little less obsessed with books. Certainly less cheeky," David said with a grin.

Hermione snorted deeply.

Jean looked back at her daughter, concern in her gaze. "He seems rather more than that however. Something's a bit…off." She sighed sadly, recognizing the look on Hermione's face. "I gather you know what we're talking about?"

Hermione nodded unwillingly. She felt odd. She felt like she was betraying Harry's trust talking about him like this to her parents. Yet her parents were some of the cleverest people she knew and she never hesitated to ask them anything before. However, what she thought was going on with Harry, felt far more personal than anything she's ever talked to her parents about before.

"Harry…" her voice faltered, "doesn't really talk about his past much. I've asked but he's always been…"

"Private?" her dad suggested.

"Withdrawn?" her mother said.

"Evasive," Hermione supplied. "He doesn't like to talk about himself."

The parents shared a look. Hermione always tried to guess the meanings behind those kinds of looks. A lot of the time it was exasperation when it came to her. Barely concealed amazement was one of her favorites.

She did not like this look at all.

"Don't push him," David said finally. "Don't force him to talk if he doesn't want to."

"I know that," she snapped back.

"Which is why I said it," he retorted.

Jean laid a hand on David's arm before speaking. "Just listen to him when he does Hermione. I know you're an excellent listener. I can tell he cares for you and you both have a good friendship."

"I know that," she said again, equal parts petulant and accepting.

"Never had a doubt," Jean replied easily.

Hermione nodded and then looked out the window. She half listened to her parents chat about their dinner plans as she watched the other cars pass.

She could not wait until school started again.