I do not own Harry Potter, the Wizarding World, or any canon characters.
Note: I'm very happy to see everyone's comments on yesterday's chapter. I really wanted it to hit the right note and I think it did. This is the last of the three chapters I was aching to share with everyone and hope people like this too. Here, I want to show that things truly are changing and that the confrontation in the Infirmary will cause a divergence. I'm rather proud of these last three chapters and am glad to see they have been well received. The critiques were kindly and thoughtfully said and much appreciated.
Someone in the comments asked if I have a schedule. For as long as I can, I plan on updating every week day as long as I have a comfortable bank of chapters. I am at 71 chapters now so I can continue for a while yet. I will occasionally do bonus updates on the weekends if I need a bit of a boost.
Thank you all for your likes, follows, and reviews. I enjoy reading the reviews and they encourage me. Have a lovely day and weekend!
The Family that Chooses You
Chapter 56 – From the Ashes
Snape stood on the landing before the Headmaster's office, staring at the door. He thought long and hard over what just happened. Normally he would be very annoyed at the students flouting authority, a trait all Gryffindors seemed to share. He did not tolerate it from any of the Slytherins.
This time, however, it did not bother him at all. If anything, it provided him two valuable bits of information. First, knowing that Dumbledore had sent the boy to his aunt was definitely a shock. The fact that it bothered him so much was also a shock to him. For the first two years and the beginning of this year, he had labeled Harry as James Potter's child in his mind. It was easy to do, the boy looked just like his father.
Except for his eyes. He had his mother's eyes.
Admittedly, the boy did not act like his father. He was not arrogant, not cocky. He did not act like his mother either, unfortunately. He lacked her intelligence, her confidence. In retrospect, he did not act like either of his parents. One could assume that to be normal since he grew up without either of them. However, Snape could feel his idea of Harry changing. Seeing how small he was, how pale he was lying in the bed, hearing about where he grew up, made Snape start to change his mind.
He hated it.
The second bit of information was just as important if not more so than the first bit. He had seen Dumbledore be hurt by Katie's words and the team's actions in the Infirmary. He had seen a giant laid low. Knowing that the infallible Dumbledore was in fact fallible, which the first bit of information also proved, was a treat to the Potions master.
He would savor the delicious morsel.
He heard footsteps from the stairwell and soon McGonagall and Pomfrey appeared.
McGonagall looked at him with one eyebrow raised. "Waiting for reinforcements?"
Snape smiled thinly. "I thought it would be best to. As well as provide Dumbledore a bit of time to recover some dignity."
Pomfrey snorted.
McGonagall shook her head. "Let's get this over with. I have a feeling this will be rather unpleasant for everyone."
Snape hoped so.
The Deputy Headmistress knocked on the door and opened it without waiting for an answer. She walked in without hesitation, followed by the Matron and the Potions master. They entered the large spacious office and stood in a line before the large desk.
Dumbledore faced away from them, not turning when they entered. He was staring into the fire, as if trying to find some sort of shape or message in the flames. Fawkes, the Phoenix, chirped a hello to the three visitors before staring at Dumbledore. It seemed the familiar had been doing that for some time.
They stood in silence for a long time, the cracking fire making the silence seem louder.
"How is he?" Dumbledore asked softly.
"He will recover, this time," Pomfrey replied. "I needn't say what would have happened if he hit the ground."
Dumbledore's shoulders drooped. "I like to think we would have prevented that. It took much for the faculty at the game to drive the Dementors back. They were frenzied."
"The rest of the team's injuries were easy to heal," Pomfrey said pertly. "The physical ones at least."
Dumbledore flinched lightly.
The silence filled the room again.
Snape could take no more. "Why on earth did you give the boy to Petunia? Why did you think that would be a good idea?"
Dumbledore turned and stared at Snape. "He's the boy's aunt. His mother's sister."
"His mother's sister hated her sister." Snape's typically cold voice was heated. "Petunia hated Lily. Did you think she would not transfer her hate to Lily's son?"
"I did not think she truly hated her. I also had hoped that losing her sister would have mended the bridge that was burned."
"For her to drop the boy off of?" Snape ignored the horrified gasps from Pomfrey and McGonagall.
"Severus' crudity aside," Pomfrey said with a look at him, "he's not far from the mark. The boy has been abused. There is no other way to describe it." Her eyes narrowed as she looked at Dumbledore's oddly placid face. She pulled her wand out and flicked it. A rustle of paper was heard and several envelopes assembled themselves on his desk.
"I knew it," she spat. "You're his guardian, aren't you?" She laughed without humor at his silence.
McGonagall reached out and plucked an envelope from the table. Without waiting for permission, she opened it, pulling out parchment and began to read. As she read her eyes widened and her skin paled. "All these injuries," she gasped. "There's so many…"
Snape took the parchment from her and read. He felt his stomach churn as he read more and more. Some he knew from personal painful experience. Ones that he had to suffer through. At least he had a parent that helped. He did not have to suffer for nearly as long, nor alone.
"How could you ignore all these?" McGonagall asked, appalled.
"Perhaps the Headmaster thought my professional opinion was a personal one," Pomfrey said snidely.
"Of course not." Dumbledore looked hurt and annoyed. "If I did, I would not trust you as the Matron and Healer for Hogwarts all these years."
"Then why? Why did you ignore these?!"
"Clearly the Headmaster was operating under the belief of…out of sight means out of mind," Snape drawled. He injected as much sarcasm as he could into his words.
"Do not speak for me Severus," Dumbledore warned.
"I find that if you do not explain yourself, one must assume for themselves what you mean," Snape retorted.
"Do not presume I owe you any explanations," Dumbledore replied, his voice rising.
"You certainly do for this!" McGonagall slapped the envelopes on the table. "This is a life, Albus! A young boy's life that you're responsible for! I told you. When I observed that foul family for just a day, I told you that they were reprehensible! They were not capable of caring for him."
"None of you know all that the situation entails!" Dumbledore paced back and forth. "There are so many factors involved. None can be invalidated. All must be taken into account."
"Then I will have to agree with Miss Johnson and Miss Spinnet." Pomfrey crossed her arms. "I would not wish to benefit from the pain of a poor boy."
"Do not paint me as a monster." Dumbledore's chest heaved. "I have provided for him. I did not interfere when I learned all the extra healing you have given him from time to time. I do my best to educate and instruct from afar."
"It is not enough." McGonagall stared at him. "It is not nearly enough. Mister Wood was correct. You spend the least amount of time with Harry than anyone else here. You think he is fine. He is not as fine as he should be, much less could be."
She looked right at him. "You have failed him, Albus."
Dumbledore looked at her, wounded. He turned away from them.
Snape pulled her back and flicked out his wand. A shimmering barrier arose between the Headmaster and the other three.
The desk shook, rattled by magic. The portraits along the walls cried out in alarm as numerous objects began to shake and crack. Fawkes sang a single clear note and it pierced the rising tension.
Dumbledore's shoulders fell again and the tension disappeared. He turned to face them and he looked incredibly ancient, beyond weary.
Defeated.
"I swore things will change, and so they will," he whispered. "Poppy, do whatever treatments you need to do for him."
"I cannot do much for him admittedly. He needs longer term care to undo the damages. Not to mention I don't want him coming so often to the Medical Ward. You know how rumors are. Perhaps he should go to St Mungo's on the regular?
Dumbledore shook his head. "No, that would create too much attention for now." At her shaking head he snapped. "Unless you do not think you are capable of treating him?" His words were sharp.
Pomfrey's head snapped back as if she was physically slapped. She leaned forward over the desk and bared her teeth, setting her wand down. "The day I am not capable of taking care of any children is the day I hand in my resignation!" She opened her empty hands. "I see no resignation here! Do I need to go fetch one?"
Dumbledore looked chagrined and shook his head. "No, I think not."
The irate Matron snatched her wand up and turned. Her feet pounded the stone floor and Snape idly imagined he could feel the whole floor shake from the force of her footsteps. She kicked the door of the office open and stomped out, kicking it shut with a slam. The three within the office could hear her cursing as she descended the steps.
"That was very rude," McGonagall said disapprovingly.
"Yes, it was," Dumbledore sighed.
"She did not deserve that."
"No, she did not. I will apologize tomorrow. If I try to now, she will say it's insincere. I will ask her for a meeting to see what we can rectify with Harry."
"I will be there," McGonagall declared. "I have failed him as well." Her voice hitched. "I have failed James and Lily. I will not continue to fail." At Dumbledore's nod of acceptance, she turned and left as well. While she did not kick the door, she also started to curse loudly as she descended.
The old wizard sat and looked down at the desk. "I would like to be alone, Severus." After a few long moments of silence, he looked up and saw Snape still standing there. "I said, I would like to be alone."
"I heard you."
Dumbledore raised an eyebrow.
"You phrased it like a request. That does not mean I must listen."
"I could order you to."
"Believe it or not, I do not obey every order you give."
Dumbledore snorted, a rich and dirty sound from a wizened face. "Fine, stay. Gloat for all you like."
"You misunderstand me," Snape said as he sat in a chair opposite. "I do not stay only to gloat. You appear to be a man in the throes of regret and remorse. I have problems of my own that are somewhat similar. I hope to learn from your example on how to cope."
Snape smiled thinly at Dumbledore's expression. "I did say not only to gloat, not to say I would not gloat at all."
"I suppose I deserve that," Dumbledore admitted. He sighed deeply. "Have I ruined him?"
"Clearly not considering that he has ones that care for him." Ones that do not include you and I apparently.
"But I have failed him." It was not a question.
Snape offered no rebuttal.
Dumbledore sighed again. "Have I become what I have feared?"
"What, a Dark Wizard?" He ignored the pawky look he received. "No, I do not think you are. However, I think you allowed yourself to be so consumed by your fear of what was to…ignore certain unpleasant details. You were so desperate for a fail-safe, you failed in his alleged safety."
Dumbledore snorted again. "That was terrible and petulant, even for you." He looked at Snape over his glasses. "Do you think yourself immune to your own criticisms? I have heard how rude you are to the boy yourself. How you have treated him."
"This is not about me," Snape sniffed. "It is true, I have been strict with him. He reminds me of his father who I have little to no positive feelings about." He grimaced. "I apparently have been so consumed with my own loss to remember what others have lost."
"You are focused on yourself," Dumbledore murmured.
"And you're focused on everyone, forgetting about the individuals as it suits your needs," Snape bit back.
The Headmaster paled again. "You are not wrong," he whispered. "There is so much to keep track of. So much to worry about. Things…get lost. Fall by the wayside."
Snape said nothing, remaining quiet and staring.
Dumbledore shook his head. "No, things will be different. I will make sure of it. Besides," he grew thoughtful, "things have indeed changed. I have been content in being an observer all this time but I will now be more active."
"Anything you wish to share?" Snape asked sardonically.
"Not now, but I will in time."
"I've heard those words before," Snape said.
"And I am sure I will say them again," Dumbledore said with maddening vagueness. "But, unlike before, I will explain in time."
Snape gave him a guarded look but did not say anything.
"I must admit, I am at a loss what to do now," Dumbledore said. "Do we share any more personal anecdotes to better our understanding of one another?"
Snape rose. "Not without some aid. I will be back momentarily." He walked to the hearth and threw a pinch of Floo powder into the fire. He stepped through the crackling green flames calling out for his office. A few minutes later he returned holding a tall unlabeled bottle of dark brown liquid and two beakers.
Dumbledore looked on with interest while Snape sat and poured out two measures of the liquid into the beakers. He accepted one and raised it. "To your health Severus." He took a healthy swallow. He then bent over the table and sputtered, resisting the urge to spit.
"Dear Merlin," he gasped. "Have you finally poisoned me like you have threatened before?"
Snape looked at Dumbledore while taking a measured sip, not changing at all in expression. "If I tried to poison you, you would know it. Besides, most poisons are rather expensive and this is quite cheap. It is a Muggle whiskey."
"How can Muggles make delicious candies and such terrible spirits?" Dumbledore glared at the bottle with distaste. "If you ever want to give Minerva a heart attack, show her that. You'd upset her base sensibilities in calling that whiskey. Why do you drink that ghastly stuff?"
Snape took another sip. "To remind me."
Dumbledore stopped spitting and looked morose. Instead, he finished his drink with another swallow, grimacing all the while. "Look at us, Severus. Two men shackled by their pasts, willingly I might add."
Snape shrugged and sipped again.
"If we are continuing this, I must insist on something far better and less likely to kill us." Dumbledore strode to a cabinet and opened it, removing an ornate bottle and carrying it over. He used a cleaning charm to scour the insides of both beakers before pouring out measures of alcohol. "Ahh, much better," he said as he sipped.
Snape nodded appreciatively as he tasted the firewhiskey.
They sat and drank in silence.
"I don't suppose you have any Sobering Potions?" Dumbledore asked.
Snape revealed a small crystal vial filled with sickly green fluid and placed it on the desk.
"Is that the more pleasant variety or the one that is rather explosive?" Dumbledore asked.
Snape shrugged. "I suppose you will have to find out when you use it."
Dumbledore shook his head and refilled their beakers again.