Chapter 14

Major spoilers for Gojo's past arc ahead!

Gojo woke long before Kaia did. He wasn't great at sleeping, often being kept awake with intrusive thoughts of the immense amount of pressure forever on his shoulders. Though, he quickly realized that Kaia wasn't great at sleeping either. She tossed and turned and sometimes cried in her sleep. But right now? Now she slept peacefully. Her reddish-brown hair was scattered on the pillow in a halo around her head and she was curled up on her side, facing him as she breathed in peaceful rhythms.

She was beautiful. She'd been so good last night. All sweet and embarrassed and trusting of him. She'd given herself to him entirely and trusted him in a way that made him feel all flighty and nervous. He'd hoped that after sleeping with her he'd be over this infatuation. He'd hoped that once he had a taste of what it was like to be with her, he'd be satiated and no longer be vying for her attention.

And yet here he was. Watching her sleep like a lovesick schoolgirl.

It was pathetic.

At least when he had fooled around with Utahime he'd gotten over it after he slept with her. He went from desperately trying to woo her and following her around like a lost puppy to acting like his normal self again once post-nut clarity kicked in.

That was not the case with Kaia.

Unlike Utahime, there was no post-nut clarity. There was only thirst. There was only the desperate need to do more with her. Sleep with her, kiss her, hold her, just be with her. It didn't matter what it was. He just wanted more.

And it scared the ever living shit out of him.

She started to stir in her sleep. He watched as little whimpers came from the back of her throat and as her brows furrowed in her sleep. Gojo intended on gently waking her, hoping to stop the nightmare before it went too far, but then it was too late because Kaia was bolting upright in the next instant, clutching her neck with both hands and shouting out a loud "NO."

"Hey, you're all right," he said softly. He sat up and brought an arm around her as she held her violently trembling hands to her eyes, inspecting her fingers for something that wasn't there.

"Sorry," she said as she caught her breath. She raked her fingers through her long hair and gave a very tired sigh.

"Nothing to apologize for," he said right away. He kissed the top of her bare shoulder and tugged her back towards him so they were lying down again.

"Don't you think it's a little ironic that the guy whose technique literally prevents anyone from touching him is so cuddly?" she mused. Gojo chuckled and curled an arm around her so that he was spooning her from behind and nuzzled his nose into her hair.

"Eh. Maybe," he said nonchalantly.

She hummed and flipped over so she faced him directly, looking into his eyes with her own emerald green ones.

"Gojo, what does this—"

"Satoru," he insisted softly. "Please."

She cracked the tiniest of smiles and went on, "okay then. What exactly does this mean, Satoru?"

God, he loved the sound of his name on her lips.

"What does what mean?" he asked.

"The sex thing," she deadpanned. She adjusted the sheet so it was wrapped more tightly around her chest and her cheeks flushed.

Yeah, he should have seen that coming. It was usually the first thing girls asked after spending a night with him.

"Before you start freaking out, I'm not asking because I want to marry you or anything. I'm not an idiot. I just need to know if this is the part where you totally shut me out like you did to Utahime. I'm not going to pine over some guy who never wants to speak to me again. I've seen that happen to Maha way too many times," she said. She sounded like she was trying to be casual about the whole thing. Trying to act like it didn't actually bother her, but Gojo could see right through it. He took her virginity last night for God's sake. Of course, she would be worried and feeling some type of way.

She had a way of acting like she was so strong when he knew she was just as vulnerable as everyone else.

"I wasn't planning on shutting you out if that's what you think," he said right away.

"That's exactly what I think," she said. She laughed a little and rolled over so she was laying on her back and staring up at the ceiling.

He didn't like that she thought that. She couldn't be further from the truth. He was hooked now. It was too late. If he wanted to ignore her and pretend that she didn't exist, then he was shit out of luck because that ship sailed from the first minute he brought her into his domain. From that moment forward, he'd been hooked.

"Look," he started as he propped himself up on his elbow to better look at her. "This doesn't have to mean anything if you don't want it to. But uh. If you… I don't know. If you want it to mean something, then maybe it could."

One red brow immediately arched above the other and those green eyes flickered to his. She kept her lips pursed, clearly trying to hold back some sort of smile, but the corners of her lips were tugging upwards and giving away how she really felt.

Which was… Amused?

"Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked.

She laughed, "that wording was just so weird. It doesn't mean anything, but it can if you want? What are you saying?"

He rubbed a hand over his face and sighed.

"I don't care either way. I just want to know what to expect," Kaia said. She sat up next to him and her bare shoulder bumped against his.

"Well, I care. And if I'm being honest, I probably can't give you a hard answer right now about what this is. But I'm definitely not going to pretend that you don't exist. I think you're strong and gorgeous and fun to be around. I like being with you."

She smirked at him and said an easy, "so what I'm hearing is you want to use me for my body?"

He grinned and leaned forward to kiss her neck.

"What can I say? You're sexy, Bunny. I can't help it."

She laughed and kissed him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him towards her until he was on top of her. He was more than happy to oblige her. He wanted to give her an orgasm that morning. Either with his mouth or cock or both. He didn't care. He just wanted to make her feel good and make her want him the way he wanted her.

But as he deepened the kiss, her phone started to vibrate on the nightstand.

She broke away with a huff and answered the phone without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?"

Gojo wasn't trying to eavesdrop, but the volume on the phone was loud and he could hear the distinct sound of Nanami's voice on the other line.

"…coming back?"

Kaia's eyes flickered to Gojo and she asked a quick, "when do we go back?"

He relaxed deeper into the pillows and kept a hand pressed into her low back when she pushed herself back into a seated position in the bed.

"Two days," he said.

"Two days," Kaia repeated.

"You should come back now," came Nanami's muffled voice.

"Why?"

Gojo couldn't hear Nanami's words. It seemed like he may have been hesitating or something like that. Because Kaia pressed with another, "Nanami? Why? What's going on?"

Gojo waited for Nanami to respond after a long pause. He and Kaia exchanged a confused look and then he could hear Nanami's voice again, though Gojo couldn't make out the words this time.

"What?" Kaia asked, voice falling to a whisper and her eyes getting wide.

"Oh…" she said after Nanami spoke again.

She hung up without saying goodbye and pressed her palms to her forehead, eyes still wide and staring a hole into the bedsheets.

"What is it?" Gojo asked.

She didn't even look at him. She just shook her head and stared at nothing.

"It's Haibara. He's dead."

Gojo pulled some strings and got them on the next flight to Tokyo. Kaia hadn't said much the whole trip back. She just nervously bounced her leg and tried to process the news. She was a sorcerer. Deaths were to be expected. Death was something that she had to inherently accept and move on.

But… Why did it have to happen so soon? And why did it have to be one of her friends?

Images of Haibara's sunny smile played on the backs of her eyelids. His dumb little grins and the way his eyes sparkled when he talked about something he was excited about. The way he and Nanami were practically joined at the hip. The sound of his over-the-top laughter when one of them did something stupid and he was there to witness it.

Her eyes burned and she pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth to hold back tears.

"Hey," Gojo said gently. He'd been watching her like a hawk all day and was horribly attuned to every wave of sadness and tears when they threatened to break. "Can I do anything to help?"

He'd been asking that all morning and Kaia desperately wished he could, but she knew he couldn't. There was nothing to be done. Haibara was gone and there was nothing she could do to change that.

She gave Gojo a weak smile.

"No, it's okay."

He frowned but nodded and held her hand, interlacing their fingers together. She squeezed his hand a little tighter every time tears stung her eyes and he would always reassuringly squeeze back.

And then just like that, they were back at Tokyo Jujutsu High, walking through Yaga's office to debrief him and officially be delivered the bad news.

"I normally would pull you aside and tell you this news privately, or at least with the rest of your classmates, but I believe you already know," Yaga started. He held Kaia's gaze with a steadiness that made her stomach clench. "Yu Haibara was killed last night during a solo mission."

She already knew, and yet hearing it from Yaga made it all the more real. Kaia's stomach dropped and she closed her eyes, biting down on the back of her bottom lip and fighting to keep her composure.

It wasn't fair.

"I'm sorry, Kaia. I know your class is very close," Yaga said gently. She waited for him to lecture her on how to handle her first jujutsu related death, but he spared her. "I believe Kento and Kiyotaka are in the common room if you'd like to see them."

She would. She would like that very much.

Kaia opened her warm eyes and nodded, blinking rapidly to try and dispel the fogginess in her vision.

"I can help you get to the infirmary and then the common room," Gojo offered kindly.

"Actually, Satoru. I need to speak with you one-on-one. Kaia, are you all right to manage on your own with your injury?" Yaga asked.

To be honest, she hadn't registered the pain in her thigh very much. She was too stuck on the fact that she would never see Haibara's sunny smile ever again.

"Yeah," she croaked, voice far hoarser than she anticipated.

She glanced one last time at Gojo and hobbled away, limping on her injured leg. She knew she should have gone to the infirmary or at least to Shoko, but instead she found herself quietly walking through the school until she ended up in the common room. Nanami and Ijichi were there, just like Yaga said they would be. Nanami sat on one of the couches alone, Ijichi sitting on the couch opposite of him. Nanami's elbow was propped against the arm of the couch and he held his head there with his eyes closed. Ijichi kicked both of his feet up on the little coffee table and reclined so far into the cushions that he might as well have been lying down as he stared at the overhead lights.

"Hey," she said quietly.

They both immediately looked at where she limped over to the sofa Nanami was on and sank down into the space beside him.

"Hey," Ijichi said under his breath.

"What happened to you?" Nanami asked. He watched her with very tired eyes that were accompanied by dark circles beneath them.

She dismissively waved her hand as her eyes started to burn.

"It's nothing. Seems like a stupid thing to talk about given uh," she cleared her throat. "Given the news."

Ijichi gave her a bitter smirk and went back to looking upwards and reclining into the sofa.

"That's how I felt today when I got back from my mission. I made a stupid mistake. Didn't properly allocate my cursed energy and the curtain broke. Caused a bit of a scene, actually," Ijichi rambled. He didn't look at her as he spoke, but she watched him as he pushed his dark hair away from his forehead. She listened carefully as his voice went from steady to shaky. "Utahime was pissed. Lectured me for a good couple of minutes. I had it coming. I knew better than to make that mistake." Ijichi's voice started to tremble. "Haibara wouldn't have made that mistake. He would have paced himself…"

Ijichi sniffled and he put his arm across his eyes. Kaia rested her elbows on her legs and let her head drop between her shoulders. She raked her hands through her hair and squeezed her eyes shut.

"He was excited about this mission. Said he was going to see his sister afterward if it went well. Did you know his younger sister can see curses? I didn't realize that," Nanami mused softly beside her.

"I think I remember him saying that. He told her not to come here though. Expressly forbid it," Kaia said.

"Probably a good idea," Nanami murmured.

"Yeah. It probably was," she said weakly.

Her eyes stung and finally, her little tricks weren't enough. No amount of pushing her tongue against the roof of her mouth or staring at bright lights could keep the tears at bay. She'd been holding them back for too long.

She remembered their first mission together. How he'd been so excited to prove himself as a sorcerer. Remembered his broad smiles and teasing laughter. Remembered how he laughed at her when she did something stupid or broke the ice if there was ever awkward tension in the group. Remembered how goddamn happy and proud he was to be a sorcerer. How he felt like he could do some real good in the world because he had a skill that so few people had.

Unlike Kaia, who was too stubborn and hardheaded for her own good. And unlike Nanami, who was too quiet and calculating to the point that he could be icy cold. And unlike Ijichi, who was nervous and fidgety to the point that he would probably be a liability in a fight. Haibara was well-rounded. He had a great attitude and was excited to take on tasks that others would struggle with.

Unlike most sorcerers, Haibara was good.

So, of course he was taken away. Of course, he was.

The tears fell from her eyes and she sniffled. Her face screwed up and a quiet little whimper escaped her lips. She hated it. She hated the feeling of helplessness. Hated the fact that no matter what she would do, this was an inevitable part of life and something expected in jujutsu society.

"It's not fair," she muttered through her tears like a spoiled child. "Haibara was good. Too good for this stupid society that we're part of."

"He was," Ijichi agreed with his own set of sniffles.

Nanami was still quiet beside her, but a moment later she felt a hand on her back that rubbed soothing circles into her shoulder blade. She wiped her eyes and glanced at Nanami. He wasn't crying, but she could see his eyes were rimmed red and the tightness in his jaw from where he clenched his teeth.

She sucked in a breath and grabbed one of the little throw pillows and tossed it on Nanami's lap so she could rest her head there. She laid down, curling her legs up on the couch, and alternated between closing her eyes and staring at the floor. He let her lay there without a word of protest and left a comforting hand on her shoulder. Though whether the gesture was supposed to be a comfort to her or him, she didn't know.

Either way, it was still welcome.

Kaia opted for going to Shoko's room an hour or two later. She limped the whole way, declining help from Nanami and Ijichi. And by the time she reached her former dormmate's room, Kaia was exhausted and out of breath from relying solely on one leg for so long.

"Sho, you there? I need your magic healing powers," Kaia tried.

The door swung open a second later, revealing a tearful Shoko who wasted no time throwing her arms around Kaia and squeezing hard enough to practically crack a rib. Kaia wheezed at the strength behind her friend's embrace and patted her on the back.

"What's wrong, Sho?" she asked in confusion. She didn't think Shoko and Haibara were particularly close? Maybe something else happened that Kaia and the rest of the second years didn't know about.

"Just come here," Shoko said. She wiped her eyes and helped Kaia hobble into her room, depositing her in the desk chair. "What's this injury you got? I couldn't make sense of Satoru's texts this morning. He seemed distracted."

Kaia cleared her throat and stood up long enough to unbutton her pants and push them down to her knees. On the outside of her right thigh was the wound. The bandage Gojo wrapped it up with needed changing, as there was already a tiny bit of blood starting to seep through. Shoko carefully unwrapped it and seethed through her teeth once she caught sight of the angry and inflamed gash.

"You ripped whatever was lodged in there out, huh?" Shoko asked as she went over to her sink and scrubbed her hands.

"I didn't want Gojo to not support my promotion because of a shard of glass. Though, I do recognize now that it was a bad idea," Kaia admitted.

Shoko walked back over to her and inspected the wound closely. The puncture wound was by far the angriest part of it, but the skin around it was red, hot, and swollen as well. Kaia just hoped that it wasn't infected.

"It's not infected, is it?"

"Not yet, but it will be if I don't treat it," Shoko replied. She busied herself with cleaning the gash with antiseptic and other medicines that made her leg feel like it was being stung by hornets. Kaia bit down on her bottom lip and curled her hands into fists against the pain. She didn't have the strength to talk through the pain of the whole thing, so it wasn't until Shoko started applying her reverse cursed technique that Kaia was able to ask her what she really wanted to know.

"Why were you crying earlier?" Kaia asked when the stinging subsided and was replaced with a comforting warmth.

Shoko's dark eyes flashed to hers for the briefest of seconds before they returned to Kaia's leg.

"I'm sorry about Haibara," she said, dodging the question.

"Yeah," was all Kaia could say. If Shoko didn't want to tell her what was up, then that was fine. That was her choice and Kaia wouldn't press. She just hoped that everything was okay with her friend.

"Did you see Nanami and Ijichi?"

"Yeah, I was actually just with them for a little while. I know this is part of jujutsu society—the whole losing people you care about thing… But it still sucks," Kaia thought aloud. She watched as Shoko stopped applying her technique and began applying fresh bandages to a wound that wasn't nearly as sore or inflamed as it had been minutes ago.

"I know," Shoko murmured.

Once the bandages were applied, Kaia pulled her pants back up and tested out how much weight she could put on her right leg and was pleased to see it was much more than before. Sure, she couldn't place all her weight on it just yet, but after a few more treatments from Shoko over the next few days, she'd be good as new.

"Thanks. You're the best," Kaia said.

"No problem. I'm just happy you're okay," Shoko said. She washed her hands again and moved to sit on her bed, pressing her back against the wall and folding her legs into a pretzel beneath her. "Hey, I don't know what Yaga told you. My guess is nothing since you just lost Haibara and he probably wants all you second-years to take time and process that. But um. Something happened while you were in Portugal. Something with Geto."

Kaia's brows knit together. Was that the thing Yaga wanted to discuss with Gojo privately?

"Suguru went rogue. He went on a mission to this little village in the countryside and—I don't know. I have no idea what happened, but he snapped and slaughtered everyone there. Over a hundred people. And then after that, he slaughtered his parents. He completely and totally lost it."

Kaia stared, mouth dry, eyes wide, and mind still. Then after a long moment, she slowly shook her head.

"No. No way. Geto would never."

There was no way in hell that Suguru Geto, the same Geto who Haibara looked up to would ever do such a thing.

"I know, but he did," Shoko said in a strained voice. She gave a heavy sigh and wiped her eyes before tears could fall. "And you know what the really screwed up thing of all this is? The really fucked up part?"

Kaia's throat hurt as she said a weak, "what?"

"The higher-ups have made Satoru his executioner."

Her stomach coiled into a tight knot.

"What? No, they can't. Geto is Gojo's best friend," Kaia blurted in disbelief. "That'd be too cruel, even for them."

Shoko just nodded sagely, eyes still rimmed red and watering.

"Yeah. They don't care though. That's probably why, honestly."

She felt sick to her stomach. She didn't want to know what Gojo's conversation with Yaga entailed, but she was sure it was enough to break his heart in two. She wished there was something she could do for him and the fact that there wasn't made her feel so terribly helpless.

Kaia tugged on her hair at the roots.

"I talked to Geto not that long ago. It was on the night we found out about my recommendation. He asked me what I thought about non-sorcerers and I thought he seemed off at the time. I think Riko Amanai's death really affected him."

Shoko winced and nodded in agreement.

"Yeah. That among other things."

"I'm worried about Satoru," Kaia admitted. She didn't want him to be ruined the way Geto had been. And what better way to crush a sorcerer than by making him execute his closest friend?

"Me too," Shoko said. "Seems like it's been a rough few days for all of us."

Kaia ended up joining Shoko on the bed and the two of them cut loose by drinking some sake Shoko had. After two drinks in, they both had loosened up and were laying down on opposite sides on the little bed. They talked about Haibara and Geto, cried their fair share of tears, and then talked about their families. Truthfully, it became drunken babble until Shoko decided to change the subject from Maha's ever lingering Trinidad trip to something else.

"Hey, since when do you call Gojo by his first name? Other people do it all the time but never you. What gives?" Shoko asked.

Kaia was drunk, but not drunk enough to give her friend the whole truth. She didn't want to have this conversation when Haibara's death and Geto's betrayal hung over them.

"Oh, I don't know. Guess it just slipped out because I felt bad for him. I think I'm going to go to bed. I'm jetlagged."

Shoko didn't seem satisfied with the answer, evident by the way her eyes narrowed suspiciously, but either because of the alcohol or the tragedy around them, she decided to not press for any more information. She just said goodnight and laid down, quickly falling asleep as Kaia headed over to her own room.

She changed into her pajamas and shut the lights off, falling asleep just as quickly as Shoko had.

Kaia's peaceful sleep was cut short by a sharp knock on her dorm door. She rubbed her eyes and checked the time of her nearby alarm clock that told her it was two in the morning before she got up, still half asleep, and opened the door with the expectation of it being Shoko.

It wasn't.

It was Gojo, leaning both of his arms on the doorframe in a black t-shirt that hung low around his collar and gray sweatpants. He wore his glasses, but they were low on the bridge of his nose and his Six Eyes were all she could see or focus on.

"Can I come in?" he asked quietly.

Kaia obliged him without giving it a second thought. She knew she shouldn't have been breaking the rules, especially not with a possible promotion on the horizon. But honestly? With all the news of the day? She didn't care.

She closed the door just as Satoru exorcised the dead little girl that had been watching Kaia sleep. He gave a heavy sigh and went right over to her bed and laid down, stretching out his long legs and burying his face in one of her pillows.

A bittersweet smile overcame her as she looked at him. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, she was happy he was there. She liked being with him. It was just hard because of the circumstances that likely surrounded his visit.

She yawned and crawled back into bed, slipping beneath the covers with quite a bit of effort due to Satoru's massive frame being on top of the blankets. She rolled onto the side that faced him and asked a quiet, "what are you doing here?"

"I needed to clear my head," he answered, pulling his head out of the pillow and looking at her above those dark lenses.

"You okay?" she asked.

He didn't answer her. Not at first. Instead, he pulled his sunglasses off and reached across her to set them on the bedside table.

He was so beautiful, with or without the glasses. But there was something about being allowed to see his bare face that brought his beauty to a new level.

"I'm not sure," he admitted. "I just knew I wanted to see you."

She didn't know what to say, so she just hummed to herself. He held her gaze for what felt like hours.

"Can I sleep here?" he asked as he reached out to cup her face and touch his forehead to hers.

She absolutely melted into the small gesture, covering the hand that held her face with her own and closing her eyes.

"Of course," she said beneath her breath.

He gave a soft sigh and kissed her once on the lips before he shut his eyes. She turned to her other side and his arm immediately went around her. He pulled her flush against him so her back was pressed against his chest and buried his face in the crook of her shoulder.

"Goodnight, Satoru."

"Goodnight, Bunny."

Author's note:

Shorter chapter this week! Drop a review with some feedback if you're able. Thanks and see you next week!