CHAPTER 2: Eating my words are my past-time…

All wrapped in one, he was so many sins
Would have done anything, everything for him
And if you ask me…I would do it again

If one looked really closely, there was always a flash whenever the last of the sun rays disappeared from the horizon; and during that time, it was as though the rays would magically take away the heat from the morning and a cold and crisp breeze would start to flow through the streets of Konoha.

The welcome chill continued way into the night as The Secret Saloon got steadily filled with shinobi who were of age to waste away their lives on booze and smoke and the occasional bets while exchanging mission stories over the steady party music.

The Saloon was the oldest pub in Konoha, an interesting structure of wood, stones, and unique overhead lights that was situated along one of the village's main streets. And ever since the place got renovated and it got that much-needed upgrade, Friday night had become every shinobis' temporary escape from the reality called life…

However, on the other side of town, in an apartment not his own, a silver-haired shinobi laid in bed, eyes wide open, thoughts running in high-speed, senses amplified by a hundred…but remained unmoving and was as still as a corpse.

Kakashi woke up with a start. He was panting raggedly, his breath coming out in shallow puffs, brows covered in sweat and the sheets of the bed he was in were tangled around his feet. He laid motionless for god knows how long as he pitifully tried to calm his raging pulse and get his bearings together.

He had that same nightmare. Again. Hideous slithering shadows clawing at his body and paralyzing him, creeping all over him, surrounding him, trapping him, until the whole of his body becomes wrapped in suffocating, painful darkness.

He had no idea when he started having night terrors. Nightmares weren't really new to him and to all of shinobi-kind—it was an occupational hazard. But this nightmare was different because it felt like he was being consumed and devoured; and each time he wakes up from the dream, he would picture a hole in the middle of his chest, see it grow larger, and larger, and larger—with nothing inside but emptiness. Hollow and void.

He had sought for Shikaku's help because he thought that being acquainted with the Nara shadows would desensitize him and stop the terrors from coming. But even when he trained with the man day and night and allowed Shikaku's shadows to reach him and lock him in place…it just wasn't the same.

The Naras' shadows were like silk, soft and cool to the touch. Like its place should have been inside the walls of the bedroom…with a certain companion… But his shadows were different. It felt more like being dragged on gravel mixed with broken glass and rusty nails. It oftentimes made him puke.

Fortunately, he had found a solution to his nightly terrors albeit temporarily and short-lived; and that was to drown himself in booze to the point of no return until there was nothing left to do but to pass out. Yes. He didn't want to sleep. If he could help it, he won't. He needed to pass out. As such, he finally decided to drag himself out of bed and on to the Saloon. His friends were probably there already, getting involved in some kind of mischief like they always did. He just had to make sure to ask them to drag his body home if ever he becomes severely inebriated—which was the plan.

He started pacing around the dimly-lit apartment whose only source of light came from a nearby lamp post across the street. Quietly, he snatched pieces of his clothing scattered around the wooden floor.

He had just slipped on his sleeveless shirt with an attached mask and was about to zip his pants close when a pair of warm hands snaked around his waist and dipped beneath the waistband of his boxers. The movement completely halted all his attempts to ever zip whatever needed to be zipped as slender fingers circled his member and began some tempting ministrations. His eyebrow shot up and an evil smirk ghosted over his masked lips.

"Leaving without even saying goodbye? Why don't you stay for a bit and play with me a little longer, senpai?" A whisper of feminine voice purred from behind him.

Kakashi could make out by feel the woman's warmth and hardened nipples as she flushed her naked body along his clothed back. Unfortunately for her, Kakashi's mind was screaming for alcohol because he desperately wanted to wash his mouth off that bitter taste from his nightmare earlier. The woman must have felt his hesitation because one of her hands slid deeper, her caresses getting firmer. By this time, Kakashi was already torn but he still wanted that drink, craved for it, and so he said…

"Beg for it."

The woman, who turned out to be a tall, sexy brunette with pouty lips and dark eyes (he wasn't even sure because it was dark and he wasn't really paying attention when he picked her up a while back and got dragged back to her place), wasted no time as she slipped her hands off him and stepped in front of him.

Kakashi watched as she slid herself to kneel in front of him, kissing her way from the middle of his chest down to his abdomen, her warm breath ghosting over his skin until she made a full-stop when her lips met the waistband of his boxers.

"Is this the form of begging you want, senpai?" She asked as she bit on the material of his clothing and slipped his semi-hard cock out of his pants and stroked it to life. "I don't mind kneeling in front of you, senpai. In fact, I love it." She said and Kakashi just stood there watching her lick her pouty lips slick and thereafter dragging his member across her lips, staining herself with his pre-cum, treating him like a lollipop.

Kakashi's only reply was a deep hum as warm lips wrapped around the head of his cock, inching their way along his long, thick shaft and taking him in deeper, making him tip his head back as he grabbed a fistful of the woman's long dark hair and guided her how he wanted to be pleasured.

Alcohol could wait. He thought.

He wanted this release…now.

Kakashi finally made it into the pub at quarter past eleven that evening, followed by the woman he was just with who turned out to be a chuunin—again, he wasn't really paying attention. The woman knew better than to cling to him, but before she left his side, she dragged her hand over Kakashi's lower back and winked at him before she slipped her way past through the crowd to go to her own group somewhere inside that pub.

Kurenai was the first one who saw him, so she immediately waved for him to come over. Her beautiful manicured hand beckoned him to move faster, so he was left with no choice but to weave his way past bodies clad in flak jackets and standard ninja wear until he finally reached their booth and sat beside her and Asuma.

Kurenai had that wide smile directed at him and Kakashi couldn't help but liken it to those women who were so fond of puppies and kittens and anything infant-like, which landed him to the conclusion that Kurenai must have been slightly tipsy already…or not…because he remembered that that's just how they all treated him—the jounin baby brother.

Forget about Copy Ninja Kakashi, forget about his arsenal of a thousand jutsu, once he made his way over to them, his already disheveled silver hair immediately got ruffled, followed by pats on his head, shoulder, and back, and if he wasn't mistaken, Anko—the jounin baby sister, just pinched his left cheek.

Kakashi just remained motionless and quiet while he wondered why no one treated Anko the way he got treated. It was…unfair.

"Glad you could make it, Kakashi. We thought you wouldn't show up. Gai and Genma were about to go and get you. What happened?"

Kakashi's exposed eye shifted from Kurenai to the two names she mentioned, which got him frowning a bit because the two, together with Raido, Hayate, and the ever-present wonder duo, Kotetsu and Izumo were crowding in front of their booth sharing snickering whispers with one another.

Kakashi's eye then shifted back to Kurenai to answer.

"I got trapped in a complicated genjutsu on the way here."

"You mean to say you fell asleep and forgot about the time and when you woke up you spent thirty minutes just staring at the ceiling and another thirty minutes wondering whether to show up or not and another thirty minutes getting out of bed and so on and so forth, until finally, three fucking hours later, you finally decided to waltz your ass in. That, or you spent hours indulging in other worldly pleasures." Asuma cut in, signifying that he did see the brunette, which earned him a sulking look from the copy ninja for exposing his lies to Kurenai, while the ever-sisterly jounin beside him chuckled and rubbed his shoulder fondly.

"Don't worry, Kakashi. If some girl ever gets attached, and we all know you don't like that, you know where to go and who to look for. Just say the word." Kurenai's crimson eyes were captivating under the warm pub lights, but whatever plan she had in mind to drive away unwanted attention from girls, most probably with the help of Anko, he didn't mind, because he trusted that they could get the job done.

"You're babying him again." Asuma called, leaning his head over Kurenai's, his head touching the side of her temple as though that was his way of reprimanding her.

"Are you jealous?" Kurenai asked as she leaned away from her lover and looked at him dead-set in the eyes.

"Of Kakashi? Of course!" Asuma admitted. "He's already in his 30s and yet he still looks like a goddamn baby! Have you seen his face?"

Kurenai laughed and grabbed Asuma's jaw, squeezing his cheeks in the process before pulling him over for a deep kiss.

Kakashi looked at them and there was a visible crinkle on his exposed eye. No, it wasn't disgusting but it was about to be, so he cleared his throat and spoke.

"You don't have anything to worry about, Asuma because it's fairly obvious that Kurenai likes her men rugged and manly, and as you just said, I am nothing but a goddamn baby."

Asuma reached over to him to clasp him on his shoulder before ruffling his already very much ruffled hair. He gave him a smile. Kurenai then turned back to Kakashi, flashing him a smile of her own as she motioned for Anko who was animatedly conversing with another shinobi.

"Why don't we get you a drink to get you warmed up, hm?"

Kakashi just nodded because that's what he came for after all.

When the ravenette got what Kurenai was asking for, Kakashi watched as Anko beamed a toothy smile, snatched an overflowing glass of beer from a passing waitress and slammed it in front of him. She then snaked an arm around his neck and pulled him to a half hug—well, more like his cheek getting smushed on her mesh-clad breast because she was leaning in on top of him awkwardly, but Anko clearly didn't seem to mind as she rubbed her cheek on top of his head.

"You made it, ya big baby!" She remarked.

"You're younger." Kakashi reminded her, his exposed eye creasing as he kept his gaze forward and reached for his drink. He then casually slipped his mask off, just enough for his lips to show and took a gulp of the golden fizzy liquid.

"Uhh, only by a few months, and besides…I'm not the one who's always getting coddled." Anko remained in her position perfectly attached to him and she made it her mission to keep pinching his cheek.

He really has got to start chidori-ing the shit out of people so they stop treating him like an aloof little puppy. He could probably take all the coddling of his jounin batch because sometimes it was nice, the attention felt good…but he was already thirty-two for crying out loud! Unfortunately for him, his age didn't seem to deter his friends' manner of treatment toward him. Even Ibiki gives him head pats sometimes…Ibiki.

"Just what the hell are they doing?" Kakashi finally asked, flicking away his thoughts of inflicting serious physical injuries as he pointedly stared at his friends' backs.

"They're waiting for someone." Asuma answered while happily chewing away some edamame.

"Who?"

"The one who claimed possession of you." Anko grinned as she finally took a seat beside him, pulled a plate of tempura towards her and began eating.

Kakashi threw a questioning look at Asuma because as far as he was concerned, Anko wasn't present during the incident. His fellow jounin only gave him a shrug.

"Ask Genma. He's the blabbermouth."

Just after Asuma said Genma's name, the group who were blocking his view with their backs broke formation and one by one took their seat around the booth.

"Bubblegum princess's not here. Too bad." Genma stated as he sat beside Anko and waved for a waitress for a cold glass of beer.

"Yeah…we were hoping to entice her over here." Came Hayate's soft raspy voice who went to the other side beside Asuma. "But it was only her blonde friend and their other friends. She's nowhere."

"Ugh, fuck. I really wanted to do some interrogating." Anko frowned, picking away strips of carrots on her dish and flinging some of it towards Raido who'd just frown at her but would playfully catch the food with his mouth.

"Or we could set the two up and let the power of youth explode!" Gai exclaimed, raising his beer glass as though urging the group to toast with him. Raido did, but then he said…

"All the youthful explosions would probably be the Hokage's apprentice because there is nothing youthful about that motherfucker." He pointed at Kakashi.

"Careful, Raido. Asuma will fight you. He just said I'm baby-faced." Kakashi replied, waggling a finger at the direction of his scar-faced friend.

"With a baby's dick?"

"Uh, want me to show it to you so you could choke on it?" Kakashi good-naturedly asked which resulted into an eruption of laughter and howls from the group, making him chuckle along.

For a while, there had been a chorus of "Show it! Show it!" which eventually died down because a bet had been started on who could be the longest, the thickest, the one with the biggest head, the one with the most veins, the fairest of them all—and they were all still sober enough to prevent one another from flashing the pub rows of dick that would probably get them banned forever if ever they did it.

Kakashi was down his fourth glass of beer when he looked around and watched his friends have a good time. He had been left on his own for quite sometime already ever since he brought out Icha-icha to prevent Gai and Genma from dragging him out of the booth and onto the dancefloor.

It was nice watching them all. It also felt nice to be surrounded by them because it made him numb to the uncomfortable prickling sensation his nightmares always left him with. The numbness was temporary but he'll take whatever relief he could get in whatever form so long as it gave him the feeling of escape and freedom no matter how fleeting.

His fifth glass of beer had just been handed to him when the music changed and the sound of thundering drums and trumpets reverberated inside the Saloon like there was a royalty coming through. And a royalty did come through in the form of the Hokage followed by her ever loyal assistant, Shizune.

"The Queen finally decided to get out of her castle to visit her loyal subjects." Gai poetically declared as he took his spot back in the booth, eyes following the blonde woman around the room who greeted everyone along the way and took a shot for every table she stopped by.

"You mean the witch had come out to trick the villagers to give her free booze." Genma whispered as he threw a pitying look towards Shizune who followed her master in silence.

"Careful what you say about her or…" Anko held two fingers towards Genma and made a snip snip on the air, which she immediately hid under the table just in time when Tsunade reached their table.

As though thinking of the same thing, the shinobi who were seated on the booth made a collective motion to move to the left to give their Hokage a space to sit on as a tray of shots promptly landed in front of her.

"Ah, you kids are so nice!" Tsunade beamed as she snatched a shot glass and dunked it. "Shizune! What are you doing over there? Go and find yourself a seat and let's drink the night away! Hell, you could even sit on Genma's lap if that'll make you happy."

If there was anything funny on what the Hokage said, it was seeing Genma blush like a genin.

"H-Hokage-sama!" Shizune whined, but she did sit beside Genma at the other end of the booth.

"Puh-lease. I've always known that there's something going on between the two of you ever since I saw you…" She pointed at Genma. "…come out of the archive room adjusting your pants, and not five seconds later you…" She then pointed to Shizune. "…appear behind him, wiping the corners of your lips like you just ate a fucking spread! Which I know you did by the way."

The group blew up into boisterous laughter but poor Shizune had buried her face on her palms as everyone saw the blush on her nape even under warm light, while the man beside her had all but managed to slip himself under their table with only the top of his bandana showing.

"Get your jounin ass out of there, Shiranui and be a man about it. As long as my employees are happy and you don't fuck up your missions, even if you lot fuck one another, then it's all good!" She waved her manicured hand over their group and shrugged as she took another shot. "I just hope it goes the same for my other apprentice…"

"W-Why? What's wrong with Sakura-chan, Hokage-sama?" Shizune asked as the group finally settled into a low chuckle.

"Look at them…" Tsunade opened her palm and motioned towards the group of younger shinobi who were seated at the other side of the bar. She was pertaining to the Konoha 11, minus a few plus Sai…who were clearly having a wonderful time hanging out together.

"My goody, goody apprentice, Sakura had locked herself in the white fortress…again." She sighed. "You'd think that four good years with me would have taught that girl to enjoy booze like I do! I mean, look at Shizune! Great drinker! Except when she hides my sake…but Sakura's different. She consciously chooses to waste her youthful years away inside the hospital. Poor child."

"Hmm, that is indeed terrible, Hokage-sama. There should be no wasting of youthful years!" Gai exclaimed and raised his glass, expecting again that people would clink their glasses against his. Good thing the Hokage did.

Hayate then timidly raised his hand, which caught the Hokage's amber eyes.

"Speak, vampire boy."

Hayate first coughed lightly to the side before speaking. "If she's locked herself in a fortress, then why not send a prince charming to get her out there?"

At the mention of prince charming, everyone turned their heads at Kakashi and the blatant gesture did not escape the Hokage's speculating eyes. Suddenly, a wide, knowing smirk graced Tsunade's red-painted lips as it became obvious to the group that she had just developed a wonderful idea, which could also be horrific. The group was waiting with bated breaths.

Kakashi couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at this. But then, Tsunade cleared her throat and leaned over the table towards his direction.

"I'm going to offer you a proposition worth one S-rank mission. That is if you'd be able to deliver."

At the Hokage's sudden statement, their booth had fallen into a hush allowing the noise of the club wash through them, but no one seemed to be disturbed as she continued with her proposal.

"Give my apprentice the boyfriend experience." She began. "Take her out on a date, cuddle her at night, spar with her on any training ground, give her gifts and flowers, surprise her whenever, get in her pants, make her fall in love, let her feel it… and I'll pay you one S-rank mission's worth, Kakashi…especially if you successfully get inside her pants."

"I refuse, Hokage-sama." Came his abrupt reply.

"Even when I have a contact with Jiraiya and his publisher, and that I could expedite one copy of his newest work signed by Jiraiya himself to be delivered to you?"

Kakashi paused to think to consider the offer for a second but he eventually shook his head, which earned him several different reactions because his friends knew how much he worshipped Jiraiya's work.

"No." He said firmly. "I'm not playing this game, Hokage-sama."

"Why? Are you perhaps wondering whether this old woman is drunk? Let me tell you this, brat, I am not drunk. Not yet. That's why I making you this offer." Tsunade then paused and leaned back on the booth, her amber eyes still focused on Kakashi.

"…Or is this because of the age difference? Or maybe you're worried about what other people would say?" She asked him, and still she wasn't done.

"I thought you didn't mind those things, Kakashi? Because c'mon. We're shinobi. We carpe diem the shit out of everything!" She finally exclaimed.

"With all due respect, Hokage-sama, this is Sakura we're talking about. For as long as I've known her, she's a walking bundle of feelings and emotions, and I refuse to play with that."

There were minute nodding movements from the group but Tsunade continued to explain her side.

"But you're not going to toy with her feelings, Kakashi…Because at the end of the day, if you ever pull off becoming her 'boyfriend', everything will be her choice and you…" She pointed a manicured finger at him. "You just happened to be there…giving her the options she could choose from. I just wanna let my apprentice have a good time. Still no?"

She let her words hang in the air for a moment, hoping to elicit some response from Kakashi but he really wouldn't budge.

"Okaaay." She drawled as though surrendering from a fight, but then she began looking at the other males of the group.

"Hayate? Raido? I'm excluding you, Asuma because you're clearly smitten with Kurenai, and nope, not you two!" She pointed at Kotetsu and Izumo who had just happened to pass by after coming from another table. "Guard duty isn't a joke and there's a lot of papers that needed sorting in the office." Tsunade momentarily pursed her lips and continued pointing to Gai next.

"Not you Gai. I refuse to referee a taijutsu tournament between you and Rock Lee because I heard that your student still harbors some feelings for my apprentice even after getting friendzoned. But I would also like to offer you this, Genma, because I'm not sure if you've already put on a label on whatever it is that's going on between you and Shizune, and I'm pretty sure that she'd be fine with this as this is a mission after all…"

She was now looking at Shizune, urging her to speak if ever she had any violent reactions. Unfortunately, the latter had none, which only meant that the two were not in a serious relationship or they just haven't gotten there yet.

"Oh, and if nothing works in this group, I could always go to the ANBU seduction squad." She added.

"I think she'll just experiment on me in the hospital." Hayate said seriously upon considering the proposal.

Raidou, on the other hand, simply looked at Kakashi and shook his head.

But then Genma suddenly spoke.

"An S-rank pays at least a million, right? Do you have a span of time in mind, Hokage-sama? Because if it's only about giving her a good time…I could do it tonight…with Shizune. If you're down with it." The last bit was directed towards Shizune who once again had her face buried in her palms, but everyone caught the smile hidden beneath her hands. It made the group chuckle once more.

Trust Genma to have his womanizing confidence back after recovering from his earlier embarrassment. But Tsunade groaned and Kakashi could see the twitch on the woman's fingers as though she was itching to throw something at the other jounin.

"I said…" She ground out, her teeth grinding due to obvious frustration. "…to give her the boyfriend experience not the hoe experience! Jeez, Genma! I don't know why I even bothered to ask you. Shizune, beware of this man. Don't hesitate to cut his balls off if he ever makes you cry. I gotchu, child." She said, still waiting for some favorable response or turn of events but there were none.

"Fine! I'm off to the ANBU seduction squad then! Maybe they could give me results."

When Tsunade stood up to leave, several different hands near her made a grab on her to stop her from moving. Her golden eyes squinted at the group because though they were not hurting her, they clearly didn't want her to leave.

"You brats do realize who you're getting your hands on, eh?" She softly threatened, and whether she was feigning or not, only she knew.

"I'll do it." Kakashi finally said and only then did the hands release their Hokage. Tsunade then sat back and turned her amused eyes at him.

"Oh? What made you change your mind, brat?"

Kakashi simply shrugged but answered anyway.

"You just said that we shinobi carpe diem the shit out of everything, Hokage-sama. Also… I do think that using the ANBU seduction squad would be a bit too much for Sakura."

"Ah, yes. How could I forget that you were once a part of it…"

"Once."

"So, ya really going for this?" Tsunade asked once again and this time, Kakashi had made his resolve.

"Yes."

"And that is why you're my favorite jounin." Tsunade beamed at him, and just like that, everything sounded noisy again—like their booth had just escaped a complicated genjutsu and everything returned to normal in a snap of a finger, or in their case, the Hokage's smile.

"I thought I was your favorite jounin?" Gai, Genma, Raido, and Hayate complained in unison. The rest of the group simply chuckled at the pathetic display of their friends.

"I have a different favorite jounin for different occasions, and this time, it just happened to be Kakashi." Tsunade confessed.

"Wait up…" Raido suddenly called. "Uh, with all due respect Hokage-sama and no offense meant to you, Kakashi but… I don't think Kakashi's the right man for the job."

Once the statement had been thrown, the group seemed to have suddenly reached an epiphany.

"We all know that he's got severe allergic reactions to relationships. Remember when he suddenly had that high fever and it wasn't even fever season?" Raido reminded them.

"He got that red-head following him around that time, right?" Anko confirmed more than asked.

"Oh, and when he asked Hokage-sama for a long-term mission because a civilian wouldn't stop visiting him at the HQ." Shizune supplied until a series of other stories resurfaced, detailing Kakashi's aversion to relationships.

"Children, children…" Tsunade called their attention. "There is nothing to be worried about. Because unlike normal relationships, this one's a mission! And I have full confidence that Kakashi would be fine, so would Sakura." She assured them before turning to look at Kakashi.

"You've got a month. But don't ever think that it's going to be easy. A million ryo isn't cheap especially when it's coming out of my pocket."

"Of course, Hokage-sama. Where's the fun in missions if they were easy?"

Tsunade smirked at this and eventually got up but abruptly sat down again.

"Come to the office tomorrow afternoon for the official mission scroll, and…I'm gonna leave everything to you but don't break her heart too much, okay, Kakashi? I've already told you that this ain't gonna be easy. So do what you have to do…but gently."

With that, Tsunade finally stood up and this time, no one tried to stop her as she made her round to another table to grab her hands on some more free booze.

"Are you sure about this, Kakashi? Because everyone on this table knows that that girl would cry." Kurenai asked.

"And we don't have to remind you what the Hokage's capable of. That woman gets crazy mad." Asuma supplied.

"Well, she classified it as an S-rank for a reason." He seriously replied but his mind was already running scenarios of several what ifs.

"Don't you be disheartened, my friend! Because if you ever need a wingman, we're here for you!" Gai grinned his million-dollar smile as he placed an arm around Asuma and Raido, and Hayate if he could reach him, and pulled them close to him. Both shinobi struggled to get loose, but Kakashi found out that the other half of the booth were faced with a very different dilemma.

"I wonder how much booze we could buy for a million ryo." Anko absently thought out loud.

"You're not included in the reward money, Anko." Raido stated which earned him a sharp glare and a snarl from the woman.

"Why, are you?" She shot back, but then Genma called everyone's attention to make an announcement, which could have been directed straight to Kakashi, but everyone knew that their friend, like Gai, had a flair for dramatics.

"A little birdie just told me that our Sakura…is still at the hospital…" Shizune was smiling coyly at Genma.

"I don't think Kakashi will share his reward money even if you say our Sakura over and over." Hayate rasped and his statement wasn't lost on Anko because the woman began whining again.

"What? Why not?! Imagine the booze and all the otsumami we could buy with that!"

When the buzzing became too loud for Kakashi to endure, he quietly stood up and then he was gone in a poof of smoke.

Outside the pub, Kakashi could hear people screaming for his name but he continued to walk towards the direction of the hospital.

He was a bit reluctant to go a while back because he was still very much lucid, and he really disliked hospitals, but the amount of alcohol in him will have to do. After all, he was able to sleep for a few hours a while back despite having woken up terribly. So, he deduced that he could probably stay awake for the next 2-3 days or indulge himself with store-bought liquor. He'll just have to see.

Sakura stretched her arms over her head and reveled at the feeling of having her joints and spine pop into place, but when she turned to look at the wall clock in her quaint little office, she was shocked to see that it was already two in the morning!

Okay she was over reacting. She wasn't really surprised because she chose to stay until that late…or early…to work her ass off just to get her mind away from the embarrassing moment she had to go through earlier that day.

"Ugghhhhhh…can't I just hide in here and rot away working? I am a very dedicated employee…" She asked the white walls of her office, and as though answering her query, the head nurse passed by her door, stopped to peer inside her office through that vertical panel of glass, and gave her a look that says, 'If you don't get out of there right now as I've been asking you to do for the last twelve times already, I'm gonna drag your peach-ass out the emergency exit and I'm not gonna be gentle about it.'

Now, people knew that Sakura wasn't someone who could be pushed around so easily, but she knew of three people in Konoha who could whoop her ass if they wanted to. First was her mother, that wasn't even a question. Second was her shishou, obviously; and third was the head nurse, Bertha-san—with her big donut-bun and huge, meaty hands.

When she begrudgingly admitted to herself that she had overstayed her welcome (along with the threat of bodily harm), she made a grab for her things and finally decided to go. After all, what could go wrong at 2AM, right? She thought as she crossed the quiet hallway.

Sakura had already made it to the steps of the hospital entrance when she was startled by what she saw.

Yeah! Nothing could ever go wrong at two in the morning! How she wanted to punch herself for thinking just that and jinxing it.

She almost scrambled herself to hide but realized that there were no hiding spots, and it was too late for a genjutsu because she knew he 'd already sensed her. So, she was just out there in the open, frozen but mildly twitching and gaping like a fish out of water as she stared at the person leaning on the metal railing of the ramp.

He was there. Kakashi Hatake was there.

"K-Kakashi-sensei?" She called.

When Kakashi lifted his head to look at her, Sakura felt her heart take a dive somewhere in her intestines because he just had to flash her that stupid eye-crinkle…which she also found really cute….all of a sudden.

She wasn't affected by this before! Because that was just how her sensei normally was! So, she was really confused about the giant butterflies making a mess of her stomach—because they weren't fluttering their wings…they were stomping six-giant-insect legs, making her wonder whether she wanted to puke or pee…or both!

Was this the result of her subconscious iron chest spilling its contents out inside her head? Because the repressed images of her sensei were messing with her. It was driving her crazy.

'Oh gods.' She pleaded internally. How she wanted to bite her fist right now to stop herself from squealing like an idiot fan girl as well as to abandon the urge to run the opposite direction.

"W-what are you doing here?" She stuttered while her feet remained plastered on the cement. "You do realize that this is the hospital, don't you? I-I thought you hate hospitals?"

Then, realization somewhat hit her like a brick of the very few reasons of why her sensei (who made it his life's mission to avoid hospitals) was there.

"Wait. Are you drunk, sensei?"

At this point, Sakura watched as Kakashi stood up from leaning on the metal rails and casually walked towards her.

DON'T RUN! Sakura screamed at herself internally but she could feel her toes flexing.

When Kakashi stopped a few inches in front of her, her eyes automatically made their way to his face and she was rewarded by his masked smile as evidenced by his accursed yet oh-so-precious eye-crinkle. DAMN… She hissed from within.

"Not really, I'm perfectly fine." He replied to her earlier question and stared at her. That's when Sakura began to walk. Side-stepping her way just appropriately far enough from her sensei's range so as not to make him suspicious of her already suspicious movements.

Sakura climbed down the stairs, all the while chanting, DON'T TRIP. DON'T TRIP. WOOPS! ALMOST! YES! THANK GODS! Then chuckling to herself as she safely descended all five steps.

But Kakashi was still there…and it was obvious that he was following her. So, now it was finally her turn to face her fears.

"Then…is this about what happened earlier? Because I can explain…really." She courageously announced but her hands kept on sliding up and down the thick straps of her brown sling bag. Kakashi merely cocked his head to the side as he fell into step beside her.

"Why? What happened earlier, Sakura?"

"Uhh, you know! Earlier at lunch, at that restaurant with the big red umbrella and I was with Ino and you were with your group, and we were eating lunch, and I was slurping my juice and... you're messing with me." Sakura finally said because she could feel more than see her sensei's smirk.

GAAAAH! Stop with the hidden smirks! My heart could only take so much eye-crinkles in one night. She whimpered internally.

Both of them had somehow made it a few feet away from the hospital, street lights illuminating their path and casting shadows beneath their feet when Kakashi finally revealed why he was truly there.

"The Hokage sent me to fetch you and walk you home."

Sakura gave him a frown, her brows dipping at the center of her forehead, making her face scrunched up like a famous grumpy cat. "Why?" She asked suspiciously because it was so unlike her shishou to give a task like that but Kakashi was calm and composed in answering her questions.

"She said it was because you were locking yourself in the fortress so she had to send a prince charming to get you out."

Sakura stopped on her tracks and turned to look at Kakashi but the latter simply continued on walking. So she jogged a few steps to catch up, her face eventually relaxing.

"And you're the prince charming?"

"Why? Did you want Gai to be here instead of me?" Kakashi asked, which made Sakura vehemently shake her head in response.

"Oh no! Though Gai-sensei is indeed a bit charming, I think my shishou did a great job on sending you instead because considering the time, I think my neighbors would appreciate some peace and quiet."

Then, because she just couldn't believe it, she asked again…

"So, you're really here to walk me home?"

Kakashi looked at her and nodded. "…And to find out the reason of your outburst earlier."

Sakura felt the machines operating in her head screech to a halt and so did her body, that even the most basic of bodily functions such as breathing stopped. She just stood on the pavement staring at the side-profile of her sensei who noticed the sudden pause in her movements, causing him to stop as well.

But one fluid movement got her functioning again. Like a switch had just been flipped and now she was capable of operating again.

Kakashi held out his hand for her to take. At first, she hesitated, obviously because of her inner turmoil. But the moment she decided to also reach out for him and grab his warm hand clad in his fingerless glove, all her worries and apprehensions seemed to evaporate as Kakashi tucked her small hand on the crook of his elbow while he brought his own hand back inside his pocket.

Then, Sakura heard an imaginary crack. And like a waterfall, she began to tell Kakashi about her day leading to their embarrassing encounter earlier that morning. But everything just felt so…normal. Sakura thought. Everything felt so light and calm and easy. Because then she remembered that her sensei had always been like this to her. It made her remember what Kakashi used to tell her. 'To tell you the truth, you were always my favorite student.' And so, she beamed at him as she ended her story, only realizing then that they were now only a few blocks from her apartment.

"…I was only stating a fact. That you are my sensei."

"Was…" Kakashi reminded her.

"I know! But you get what I mean." She answered back as they walked further and further and closer to her apartment.

"I should probably stop calling you sensei, then."

"If it's a personal kink then I'm not going to stop you, Sakura."

Sakura felt the blood rush to her cheeks but she began laughing, and as she desperately reigned in her glee, she noticed that the arm she was holding onto had suddenly disappeared. So, she looked around to see that Kakashi had been left standing a few feet away from her.

She frowned.

"Sakura, there's something I have to tell you." Kakashi started which made her frown all the more.

What brought the sudden change? She thought. Everything was going well. So, she wasted no minute to ask and urge him to tell her what's going on.

"What? C'mon Kakashi-sensei. Unless you're going to tell me that you're done with Icha-icha and that you've set all your books on fire, there's pretty much nothing that can surprise me anymore."

Except you, showing up at the hospital at this time of night…

But his answer was different. And like what she said, she wasn't surprised.

"It has something to do with the Hokage."

"What? Did she drown herself in sake again? Or made a bet that she couldn't get out of?"

"No. None of that, but…she turned you into a mission."

Okay, now she was surprised.

"What? Me into a what?"

"She turned you into an S-rank mission and assigned you to me."

Sakura's mind was running a mile a second trying to come up with reasons on why her shishou would do something crazy like that. Four years with the sannin indeed made her realize that the woman had some crazy moments. Was it happening again? Where was Shizune?

"Me? An S-rank?" She repeated just to be sure and Kakashi nodded.

That's like being placed in the bingo book! She thought. Her mind might have gone off in the wrong direction but she suddenly felt excited.

"Nice!" She suddenly exclaimed, which had Kakashi looking at her warily. "Wait. What are you doing over there?" She asked.

"I thought you'd get angry and start punching the earth or something." He confessed, still unmoving on the spot he was rooted on.

"Is that why you're over there?"

"A ninja always has to have multiple escape routes."

Sakura snorted, which turned into a full-blown laughter especially when Kakashi still refused to come near.

"I'm not mad, Kakashi-sensei!" She said in between laughs. "So why don't you get your sexy ass over here."

"My what?" He asked, and suddenly he was already there! Offering the crook of his elbow for her to once again take, which she did.

"What?" She feigned ignorance, trying her hardest to maintain a straight face and stop the smile that was coming up, but no one's gonna make her repeat that slip of tongue. That's why, she immediately changed the subject as they fell back on their easy stroll.

"So, are you at liberty to discuss your mission with me?" Sakura asked curiously, peering at him under her lashes, unsure whether Kakashi would reveal details. And he did.

"Two words. Boyfriend experience."

Boyfriend experience. Her thoughts echoed.

Sakura never had a boyfriend before so she had no idea what that experience was supposed to entail, but she had read enough material about boyfriends to know what to expect. Surely, all those things from the romance novels she'd read had come from legitimate first-hand experiences. Just like when the guy is mean towards the girl, that meant he liked her, right?

*cough* Sasuke *cough*

After all, no matter how toxic the relationship got in novels, the guy ends up changing for the better and the girl gets the guy in the end, and they'd live happily ever after. That's how it goes… right?

She had so many questions she wanted to ask Kakashi but she finally settled at the simplest, most rational question to ask next.

"How long?"

"A month."

A month? Was that long or short? If they were talking about missions, then a month is long. She thought.

"What will happen after a month?"

"Same as what happens after a mission."

Kakashi's statement made her stop mid-step, and she looked at him with wide eyes probably filled with mischief because she saw his exposed eye squint at her a bit.

"You're gonna get paid!? Oh, hell yes! We are so going to do this!" She exclaimed, but Kakashi didn't look happy.

"Uhh, Sakura, are you…"

"Sure? Of course!" She assured him. "My bathroom is in major need of an overhaul. I mean you at least have to give me a portion of your reward money as I am so willing to be…accomplished… Did you get that? Mission. Accomplished. I'm. The. Mission."

Sakura wiggled her eyebrows at Kakashi, saying the last bit painfully slow to elicit some kind of reaction from him and she was a hundred percent sure that he was struggling not to react at what she said.

Kakashi merely shook his head and ran a hand through his hair.

"Don't say I didn't warn you."

He said, and that's when she noticed that they had finally made it to her apartment building.

Sakura then untangled her arms around Kakashi's and stood in front of him, smiling. No, not beaming. Just smiling…As evidenced by the lack of teeth showing.

"Thank you for walking me home, sensei." She said sweetly. "And you have nothing to worry about because I know the drill here." She assured him as she spoke her next few words slowly. "I am not going to fall in love with you. So again, you don't have to worry, okay?" She finally said as she gave him a wave good night.

.

.

.

She obviously ate her words.

She already knew this for sure and future her…was probably even choking on it.

A/N: I swear I intended the last bit about "choking" to be clean (as clean as could be), but if it came to you as dirty, that's also fine. Like-minded individuals are always welcome here. *Wink. Wink.*HEHE. I also honestly have no idea where this story is headed but I'm pretty sure that I'll stick to the song lyrics which prompted me to write this fic. I also wanna say that I love all my characters here especially momma Tsunade and of course, Sakura.

Thank you for reading, everyone!

Music prompt and lyrics: Heaven by Julia Michaels