Author's note: My apologies for late update since I have had fever for two days. I hope it will be a good read still. Thank you for follows, hearts and reviews. It makes me feel like I am not alone enjoying this story and we are a small community and I need to continue writing for you all 3
Chapter VI:
With slow and hesitant steps, Hermione made her way to the the dining room, following the elf that came to fetch her at exactly five to seven. She felt odd to say the least, under the heaviness of the dress. The lace collar around her neck felt suffocating and she touched her neck with her fingertips in hopes to ease the discomfort. Hermione couldn't remember the last time she wore a dress let alone a gown. The war had transformed her into a version of herself that she loved, one that she had forgotten until she felt the determination to save Ron. And if it meant wearing a heavy gown, and an expensive jewel and dine with Draco Malfoy, she would do it.
He welcomed her with a strained smile, and she felt her heart skip a beat, it felt odd to say the least. Draco pulled a chair for her and she noticed the shiny silverware and the crystal glasses that reflected the candles lit around them. According to the elf, the dining room was smaller of the two, the larger reserved only for big dinner parties. And there hadn't been any since Malfoys' last visit to the castle when Draco was three years old. Hermione's curiosity peaked, she made a mental note to ask the elf more about the castle, or maybe she could ask Draco if they were to be on good terms.
"You look -" he stopped himself, and stepped forward to take her hand instead. "This color looks good on you, Granger" he guided her to take a seat on the chair that he pulled out for her.
"Didn't know you had dresses laying around and jewelry too-" she couldn't help but fidget with the lace around her neck.
She heard him chuckle, and he paused, right behind her, his fingers tapping gently against the chair she sat on. "I asked Pansy to get you some clothes, but she got you an entire wardrobe instead. I had to hide most of what she bought in the room next door- I wasn't sure if you'd like her aesthetic" he cleared his throat, to ease the light awkwardness in the air.
"I hope you don't mind the dinner. The elves were excited to find out that I wanted to dine with you" Draco filled their glasses with wine, Hermione noticed that he did so with wandless magic, again.
He took a seat across her, eight chairs on both sides between them, placing the napkin on his lap.
"Am I the first–" she hesitated, and emulated him, placing the napkin on her lap, soothing down the edges. "I mean, is it because, this is the first time someone like me dines in this room?"
"No, because, they were quiet worried about your health especially since you stopped eating"
"The elves worry about me?"
Draco nodded, taking a sip from his wine. "Is that surprising? They were tasked with taking good care of you, making sure you eat well, sleep well and your wounds are healing. Imagine their worry when I arrived and they had to inform me you haven't eaten since yesterday-"
"I feel apologetic, I hope they will not get punished because of something I didn't do-"
Draco chuckled, and leaned against his chair, his fingers gently caressing the stem of the crystal glass and Hermione noticed, averting her gaze with a blush on her cheeks. "Can you promise me something, Granger?"
"That depends, Malfoy"
And she blushed even more seeing the smirk on his lips. She told herself that it was just dinner but, she was waiting for his demands come flooding after the one promise she had made.
"Malfoy, is it?- well, alright Granger. I want you to promise me that during this dinner you will keep an open mind and see me as Draco Malfoy only, not Draco Malfoy, the Death Eater or Draco Malfoy, the son of Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy or as Draco Malfoy, who used to call you all sorts of names growing up-"
Hermione nodded, and brought the glass to her lips. Suddenly, she felt too conscious of her hands still in bandages, and a few of her fingers missing. With a frown, she placed the glass on the table and hid her hands on her lap away from his view. If she managed to survive this, there was a lot that she had to work on and she wasn't sure if she could ever return to being who she used to be. Maybe, the reason for her sadness lately wasn't only the reality of a war lost, but the grief over the woman she used to be and she was no more.
"Then, tell me why you helped me, Draco. An honest answer-" there was no reason to beat around the bush, with the pleasantries and all that. His answer had never been good enough for her and she wanted to dig deep and find out the truth.
Hermione noticed the frown growing on his face, and the tension around his shoulders, and she was determined not to give him an easy way out this time.
"You asked me to see you as Draco Malfoy only, and I think that implies that we can let go of all the barriers we had built around ourselves for many years because of who we are and what we represented. So, I want to hear Draco Malfoy tell me the truth, beyond that - no one deserved to die like that."
"It's not that complicated, Granger" he replied, and stared at the dishes that materialized in front of them. Hermione's stomach grumbled and she bit her lower lip, unable to tear her eyes from the all the dishes that called her attention. But, she wasn't going to give in so easily either.
"Then, it shouldn't be difficult to explain, Malfoy-"
"You are such a stubborn little witch, did you know that?" he stared at her in disbelief, "and I have always found that to be one of the most annoying things about you" he stood up to cut some slices of the roast beef with precise movements of his wrist.
"You can tell me what else you found annoying about me after you answer my question, Malfoy"
It was as if he didn't hear her at all, and Hermione began feeling impatient. She nervously chewed on her lip, while Draco picked up her plate and began to fill it with meat, grilled vegetables and some pomegranate seeds.
"You won't accept the answer as simple as I wanted to help you?" he wondered, filling his plate. "Because, it is that simple, Granger. I wanted to help you especially after-" he hesitated and Hermione held her breath, as if aware of what he was about to say.
"Maybe, we shouldn't talk about it given your condition-" he frowned, and Hermione stared at him, poking the food with the fork, avoiding her gaze.
"I am fine, Draco-"
"Are you really, Granger? It is hard to believe that you would be fine after everything my aunt put you through not once but, twice-"
His words stung and Hermione knew that in a way he was right. She wasn't ready to relive the past, the distant or near but, she wanted him to say it. To admit that the reason he helped her wasn't because he wanted to possess her as a prize, the Harry Potter's side kick, like he once said.
Or maybe, because she wanted to prove a point to herself.
That there was more to him than met the eye.
"I need to hear you say it, Draco" with the most gentle voice, she could muster she tried to encourage him, plea with him. His facial muscles relaxed, their gazes meeting together, in a magnetic dance and even she felt the magic shift in the room.
"I am sorry that I didn't stop her at the manor-" he spoke, his eyes not leaving hers, even for a brief second as if he wanted her to see through his soul, that he meant every word and there were no lies behind his words. "I was a coward, I admit. Looking back, I could tell you every single emotion I felt hearing you scream-"
Hermione broke eye contact, closing her eyes momentarily. Draco responded by curling his fists on the table, and he continued only when she met his eyes once more, nodding in encouragement for him to continue.
"You see, when I took the mark, I didn't take it because I believed in what it meant. I took it because, I had no choice. Looking back now, I realize it even more that we, Malfoys, didn't have a choice but do as told and mother still blames my father for that, you cannot imagine the amount of conflict they had over the whole thing-"
Draco finished his wine and then, filled his glass and hers with a flick of his wrist.
"I have always wanted to become someone my father was proud of. I am sure you know that about me. It was never a secret. And after he returned from Azkaban, he wasn't the same, mother told him right away that we should leave. We wouldn't be the first aristocratic family to abandon the Dark Lord's cause. But, my father refused. I couldn't understand his reasons then, but I do see them now very clearly. The Dark Lord wouldn't have forgiven him and us, he would have made an example of us and Bella would have come for us anyway. Even though she loves mother, she wouldn't have accepted such humiliation in the eyes of the Dark Lord so, we stayed."
Hermione's heart raced, and she tugged on the lace around her neck. It was her turn to frown and feel upset about the world, once again. A world that had been so cruel to so many people in her life, her friends and her parents and also, to ones like Draco, seemingly an enemy but not by choice.
"It doesn't justify my coward behavior but, maybe it could explain our sensitive position at that time. I don't know if you heard that the Dark Lord made the manor his headquarters and he was our guest for months-" Draco paled visibly, his fingers twitching against the white cloth of the table.
"I could have saved you but, it would have meant a duel with Bella, my father would have probably had another breakdown and I can't think how mother would have handled all that. She had too much worry on her mind; me, father and Bella. I couldn't risk that kind of exposure. It would have meant the end for us- so, maybe by helping you now, I am trying to make amends for what happened last time-"
"Draco-" she cut him off, tugging on the lace once more, she felt like she was going to faint, she struggled to breathe, and felt as if she had been chained once more, her movements constricted. "Are you implying that you are not afraid anymore or are you saying that the Malfoys are so secure in their standing in this new world we live in?"
"I know that you will hate the answer, Granger so, I am going to live it to another day-"
He stood up, and took a few long steps to reach her. His hands hovered over her shoulders, and then, he asked, "May I?" and Hermione, despite the growing blush on her cheeks, nodded, allowing him to unbotton the lace collar that had so beautifully lay on her neck and shoulders. It complemented the black gown she was wearing so well and maybe, if she wasn't as broken as she was, she would have enjoyed wearing it.
"I have noticed your discomfort but, I didn't want to say anything until I was sure. Next time, do let me know, Granger" he was gentle with her, taking his time. Hermione appreciated it.
"We all have to live with the choices we once made, Granger" his fingers caressed the side of her neck ghosting and leaving invisible prints in their wake, his magic at the tip of his fingertips coming to life feeling her shudder underneath, as he removed the collar, "I can't change the past but, if I could make it less painful for you, I would."
Hermione was surprised, unsure whether because he was so delicate with her, or because, there was a surge of electricity between them that made her feel things she never thought she was capable of feeling.
Draco placed the lace collar on the table, and returned to his seat.
"What will happen to me, Draco?" she asked the inevitable, once she had recovered her senses.
"Nothing-"
"That's not the answer I am satisfied with and you know it, Draco"
"You are a stubborn little witch, Granger" he let out a sigh and finished his wine. "I can't give you the kind of answers you want to hear. But, I can promise you that I will keep you protected. I know you don't trust me but, you will have to learn to trust me, Granger. Today, we took the first the step" he raised a brow and she stared at the ring on her finger.
"Did Pansy buy this ring too?" she asked and she heard his laughter fill the room. The one that she heard only once and the one that filled her being with so many memories, good and bad but all from the easier times in life.
"That ring used to belong to my mother, in fact it was my father who had gifted her the ring when they were-" he tapped on his chin, "I believe when they were in their fifth year of Hogwarts. It was a promise ring of sorts that he would always love her, and protect her and marry her someday."
Hermione showed no emotion. The ring was breathtaking and heavy. But, it made her feel very uncomfortable to know that it sat once on Narcissa's finger. That it was bought by Lucius Malfoy. And even though, she could feel her walls slowly coming down when it came to Draco, she wasn't sure if she could ever do the same when it came to his parents.
"Why did you give it to me? Does your mother know I have it?"
To her shock, Draco nodded his head. If there was ever a time when Hermione Granger didn't have anything to say, it was one of them. And it was a very very rare moment.
"She kept it in the vaults in Gringotts's and I asked her permission before I took it out. It is the only piece of jewelry she owns that is not tainted with dark magic. That's why you are able to wear it without any discomfort to say the least. I guess Lucius Malfoy once failed to follow the pureblood rules, can you imagine that?" clicking his tongue, he shook his head.
"But why, Draco?"
The side smile on his lips carried heavy sadness, and she noticed how he averted his gaze, to play with the food on his plate, and fill his glass with more wine.
"You will have to wait and see, Granger. Like I said, you will have to learn to trust me. For now, I want you to care for the ring, keep it safe, somewhere only you will know."
Hermione wanted to protest, and object, she didn't want the ring. She had no use for it anyway but he quickly cut her off by raising his hand.
"I am not asking you to marry me, Granger. Nor am I confessing anything. I just ask you to keep it safe for me, will you?"
Hermione nodded, with a frown on her face.
"Good girl. Now, finish your food. And tell me, which of the Malfoy ancestors is the most awful prick you have ever heard of. I assume you finished the chapters of the Sacred Twenty Eight-"
She stared at him, bewildered. She wanted to scream at his face for calling her "good girl" but, slowly her lips broke into a smile and he followed as well, and for the first time, in days, she found a certain level of comfort when around him. Because, his walls were coming down too.
She told him her strong opinions about the Malfoy ancestors she read about, and an hour later, while enjoying the dessert, they had gotten into a heated argument over arithmancy that turned into a long discussion over international politics.
By the time, he was walking her back to her room, she hoped that they could do that again.
"Granger" he whispered, staring at his feet.
They had wine with dinner and then, firewhiskey after dessert and Hermione felt like she was buzzing, her whole body felt warm and tingly. She had no doubt that Draco was a brilliant wizard. She could remember his academic accomplishments like yesterday, always trailing a step behind her in most of the classes they shared. But, it surprised her to have deep and complicated conversations with such ease with him. His intelligence made her warm up to him. Not all at once, but with a few steps forward.
He stood at her doorway, his hands in his pockets and it felt as if the war hadn't ruined a part of their souls, but they were carefree teenagers again, though Hermione couldn't remember a time when she wasn't helping Harry defeat some kind of an evil. It felt odd really, to be so close to him after the night they had. He asked her to see him as Draco Malfoy only and she tried her best to put their past behind. She did her best to see him as a man who grew from the choices he had once made. And though she didn't know what he had become, she was thankful that they could sit down and have an honest conversation together.
"Thank you for having dinner with me" and she felt him close, close enough so she could detect the undertones of his cologne, her mind was all over the place to pinpoint what they were but, she tried; wood, amber…and a hint of orange? No- it couldn't be it. She didn't realize how close he had gotten, she could feel the heat radiating from him and the tingles of his magic, barely there but, still very much present, unique to Draco.
"You are full of surprises, Draco Malfoy but, I am not complaining. You are helping me decipher the mystery that you are" she didn't tell lies.
"I should continue keeping you on your toes, Granger- make you think of me, be fascinated by me" he was teasing and she responded. A soft laugh, and her fingers held on to his jacket.
It was an innocent reflex.
But, he froze, staring at her fingers.
She reached out on instinct but, she couldn't withdraw them without feeling more awkward than she did. And then, she realized that the moment didn't feel awkward at all. In fact, it felt everything but. She couldn't meet his eyes, in fear of being judged or ridiculed and though he promised that they would have a new beginning as Draco and Hermione, at the end of the dinner, memories from the past were too fresh so they still lingered deep within.
She tried her best, she truly believed everyone deserved a second chance, or third. But, she couldn't meet his eyes until she felt his hand wrapped around hers. He was so gentle with her that it made her question everything she had ever known about him, once more.
"Granger.." he spoke, his voice a mere whisper that lingered in the shadows of their surroundings.
A moment of silence held them in an embrace and it was so soothing that it could lull her to sleep like a soft lullaby her mother used to sing when she was little.
He leaned closer, staring down at her, and his free hand cupped her cheek. The furrowed brows of his contradicted the softness of the moment, and she noticed how his pupils were dilated, and his lips parted. Suddenly, her heart was racing and she felt light headed, his cologne was intoxicating, that she realized.
"Sleep well.." he said, abruptly, lowering their hands.
It took her a minute to register that he was gone. And she stared long and hard at her hand before she finally managed to close the door and throw herself on to the bed.
With a frustrated groan and a million confused thoughts that were about to keep her awake all night.
She hadn't seen him for two days, and her days fell into her usual routine. Breakfast, reading, lunch, more reading and a check up done by elves of her wounds, and scars. Hermione had concluded that she was right all along about Draco and it was undeniably a good feeling. It surprised her but, most importantly, she felt relieved knowing that he didn't stop Bellatrix because, he hated her but, because he was looking out for his family and she wondered if she would have done the same if it was her parents in question.
It was late in the morning when Hermione sat down for breakfast. Pouring herself a cup of tea, she added milk and sugar, and stared out of the window. The weather outside was changing, the castle and its grounds covered by misty clouds of the north. It gave Hermione comfort knowing that they were in Scotland, a place she had always associated with the comforts of a home.
Hermione looked over her shoulder when she heard a loud pop and saw an elf placing a few books on her desk and the newspaper, "Some reading for Miss, on orders of Master Draco."
"Master Draco is home?"
"Yes- he returned early this morning and asked me to bring you these books and today's Daily Prophet the moment it was out for distribution" the elf left with a pop, and Hermione leaped forward to grab the newspaper, carelessly placing the tea cup on the table.
There on the first page, was the photo of the Minister of Magic in front of an empty prison cell in Azkaban. "The blood-traitors escape Azkaban. The Ministry promises an investigation and warns the public of the criminals at loose."
Hermione covered her mouth with her hand, to suppress her emotions that threatened to spill from her lips. She read the article twice, maybe three times, carefully checking the names and the details.
"Ronald Weasley, the Undesirable number one, has escaped….it is suspected that he has received help from his blood-traitor brothers Charlie and Bill Weasley who have been in hiding since the Dark Lord's victory… the Ministry announced the man hunt for the blood-traitor Weasleys across Europe…"
Ron had escaped.
Charlie and Bill were alive.
Her chest heaving, Hermione dropped the paper on the floor and ran outside. She ran and ran and didn't stop in her tracks until she reached the edge of the cliff.
They were alive.
All the emotions she had suppressed minutes prior, came flooding down her cheeks, she sobbed openly, shamelessly, feeling the cold wind kissing her bare arms and legs.
She screamed, and wailed, relieved that her best friend was alive, and away from the Azkaban but also, her tears meant that she was grieving.
She had lost him again. He was somewhere, free and she was still a prisoner.
Even though Draco had saved her and promised to protect her, she was still a prisoner and maybe, she would never see Ron again. But, maybe he didn't know that she was still alive.
And maybe, it was for the better. It would be the easiest on him if he believed she was dead so, he could move on living his life away from the mess that the Britain had become.
She stepped closer, unconsciously and stared at the waves crashing against the rocks, the weather was changing but, Hermione didn't mind the cold that had embraced her and numbed her limbs.
And then, there was a black cloud that had embraced her, and she felt arms wrapped around her when the black cloud dissipated and turned into one Draco Malfoy and a familiar scent hit her nostrils.
His soft breath against her ear, whispering sweet nothings, he held her pressed against his chest, "Don't, Granger-" he begged.
In confusion, she turned to face him, only to see the bags under his eyes, and a small cut across his cheek bone.
"You saved him.." she whispered, and he stared down at her, studying her face.
A moment of silence before he nodded.
"Draco…" she felt his hand on her cheek.
"Don't jump.." he begged again, with his tired eyes searching hers.
"What? Draco, I wasn't going to –" she protested.
"Oh, forgive me then- I didn't mean to-" he began and she felt his arms drop to his sides. Hermione felt a rush of electricity between them, his magic was calling for hers and though she hadn't felt her magic in months, like she used to at least, she stepped forward to cup his cheeks.
She felt power at the tip of her fingers, and that power was Draco Malfoy.
He did as he promised, saved Ron and spared his life.
And then, all the walls between them, if there were any left standing, came crushing down with a loud thud as she reached for his cheeks, pressing her lips on his.
There was no such moment when Hermione Granger felt her insides buzzing with such intensity that she could explode from pure joy.
He had saved Ron.
For her.