The Misadventures of Hyperdimension Peashy

Episode 55

by Derald Snyder

"But why do I have to go to the gym?!" Chika whined as Peach dragged her along by the wrist.

"Well, after that terrorist incident, it's dawned on me that we might've been getting a little complacent," the blonde answered. "I've already gotten Lady Vert to agree to do more Quests... but you've probably dropped all the way back to level one, so to speak, so fighting monsters is out. So we're going to re-train you the old-fashioned way... with some heart-pumping cardio!"

"But I don't like getting sweaty!" Chika protested.

"Like Adrian always says, the more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war," Peashy retorted. "Besides, it's not like I'm putting you through the same hell as I did those Lastation Army soldiers... but that doesn't mean I'll be easy on you either." With that, Peach pushed through the doors to the gym lobby...

*Inside the gym...*

"Hey there, A-Mac!" Peach called as she and Chika entered the cardio area, both women now dressed in muscle shirts and exercise shorts.

"Hey, Peashy!" her half-brother waved back.

"Hi guys!" Nisa gasped out and waved briefly as she ran on a treadmill, Arthur supervising her.

"Oh, Nicole's here too, huh?" Peach observed. "Good, maybe she and Chika can train together, then."

"Let me state clearly that I am not here by choice," Chika said. "But Macintosh simply would not take no for an answer..."

"Do you wanna be a helpless damsel-in-distress next time thugs attack the Basilicom?!" Peach shot back at her. "Or do actually want to have a snowball's chance in heck of actually fighting back? I know you know how to fight, we worked together during that one Quest with Iris Heart awhile back..."

"Not something I wish to recall," the Oracle groaned. "...Your point is taken, however."

"Right, so you two mind helping me out?" Peashy requested. "Or at least make sure I don't push her TOO hard..."

"Sure thing," A-Mac nodded. "Nicole, you okay?"

"Yeah, go ahead!" Nisa gasped. "I'm good."

"Alright, well how about we start you out on the exercise bike? That should be simple and safe enough," Arthur stated.

"Very well," Chika acquiesced as she got into the seat, Peach adjusting the height so the greenette's feet could comfortably reach the petals.

"So how come you're training here, Nicole?" Peach asked. "You looked like you were in pretty decent shape already..."

"Apparently she had a bad nightmare a few days ago," A-Mac answered for her, "Something about demons from the bowels of hell rising up and trying to conquer Gamindustri... which is a bunch of hooey if you ask me. But hey, she wants to come with me to gym, fine by me!"

"It's not... hooey!" Nisa grunted. "I've actually... been there...!"

"Oh really?" Peach crossed her arms in mild disbelief. "Why would such a brave, upstanding Hero of Justice end up in the depths of hell? Was it a near-death experience, or something?"

"That's not it..." Nicole gasped as she hit the STOP button on the treadmill, allowing to halt her jog and catch her breath, a little sweat visible on her t-shirt. "If you must know... after I helped Nepgear and the CPUs put an end to the Deity of Sin for good, I was contacted by 5pb., who said her cousin needed some help with an experiment she was conducting. Of course, a Hero of Justice never refuses a request for help, so I agreed and went with her to Leanbox..."

"5pb's cousin... you must mean MAGES. the Mad Magician," Chika said as she pumped her legs on the exercise bike.

"That's the one," Nisa nodded. "She said she needed a test subject for her experiment... if successful, we would be able to travel between dimensions. I was pumped to bring my brand of justice to other worlds, so I eagerly went all in..."

"But something went horribly wrong, and you ended up in the demon world instead," Arthur guessed.

"Pretty much," Nicole sighed. "After a few events I'd rather forget, I ended up working at the castle of the Overlord for a while... Actually, compared to what I was expecting, he and his subordinates weren't really all that bad... Although, the fact that he was a bratty teenager might've had something to do with it..."

"Th-the Overlord is a bratty teenager? Seriously?!" Peach sweat-dropped. "That's about as believable as saying Histoire can pitch men several times her size out the window...!"

"And we all know... how that turned out..." Chika panted. "With you... doing a cartoon... coyote impression..."

"Uh..." Nisa and A-Mac grunted in unison, their eyes shrunk to white circles.

"A-anyway, moving on!" Peashy insisted with a red face. "S-so what happened after you left the Overlord's castle?"

"Actually, the castle had a dimensional gate in the shop area," Nisa said. "One day, I was able to knock out the guard and escape through the portal... only to end up in an alternate netherworld. As it turns out, there were many different netherworlds in their own dimensions... so I traveled from one to the next in hopes of finding a gateway that would take me back to Gamindustri. Fortunately, time flows differently in the netherworld than here, so I had plenty of time to search..."

"So how long... were you gone...?" Chika gasped.

"I don't remember," Nicole shook her head. "The days and years just seemed to blend together sometimes... I mean, even when I had to work for demon lords or overlords, I was usually fighting other demons, so it's not like I lost my Hero of Justice creds... I'm just glad I'm such an optimist by nature, or I might've given up..."

"Nicole..." Arthur began. "I... I had no idea..."

"Don't worry about it, Arthur," Nisa smiled and shook her head slightly. "The point is, I made it back here in the end, with my humanity intact. That's all that matters!" Clenching a fist, she continued, "I might have mellowed a little from my time with the demons, but I still wanna be the greatest Hero of Justice!"

"That's the spirit!" Peashy encouraged. "So you and Chika can train together, so you can get your old strength as a Hero of Justice back, and she won't be helpless in a fight!"

"Phew... I think I'm done..." Chika gasped as she slowed to a stop on the exercise bike, panting heavily, sweat pouring down her face.

"Really...? But aren't you still on the easiest setting?" Nicole inquired.

"I guess she really does have to re-train from level one..." A-Mac sighed. "Alright, go get a drink of water. I'll get the 5-pound dumbbells so you can start working your arms..." Chika just silently nodded as she slid off the bike, her legs a bit wobbly as she slowly walked out to the drinking fountain...

*The next morning...*

Chika gasped and panted as she stumbled along, she and Peach dressed in tracksuits. "Seriously, Chika, are you out of breath already?!" Peach grunted incredulously. "We haven't even reached the halfway point yet...!"

"I could... never run... as far as... you could..." the Oracle gasped in protest, as she found a bench to collapse onto.

"Well, I know that," her companion said as she came up next to her. "This is actually a shorter route than what I usually do... I mean, I told you I wasn't trying to push you too hard..." Bending down slightly, Peach mildly pleaded, "Look, can you at least walk the rest of the way? I want to make sure you memorize the route..."

"I... I guess I could do that..." Chika grunted as she sat up.

A short while later, the two women came to a sharp incline in the road. "This is the end of our route," Peashy explained. "And this steep hill is your benchmark. Once you can get all the way to the top without collapsing from exhaustion, we'll consider your re-training complete."

"S...Seriously?!" the Oracle gaped in disbelief. "I don't think I could even walk up that thing...!"

"Not right now, you can't," Peach agreed, "but we'll work our way up to it. First, though, we should focus on running the whole route without a break first. Then we'll tackle the hill. Sound fair?"

"I suppose..."

As they made their way back to the Basilicom, Peach and Chika saw someone working out on a kid's jungle gym. As they came closer, they realized it was Nisa herself, doing some one-armed pull ups. "See, Chika? Now that's dedication," Peashy observed.

"Hey guys!" Nicole called as she dropped to the ground. "You're starting early too, huh?"

"The early bird gets the worm, as they say," Peach quoted.

"You know it!" the bluenette agreed. "So, since we're all together, let's go have some breakfast, and then we'll hit the gym!"

"Food sounds good," Chika assented...

*Later, at the gym...*

Nisa was doing some sit-ups, while Chika was using the jump rope. "C'mon, faster!" A-Mac encouraged his girlfriend.

"Pick up the pace a little!" Peach ordered Chika, who started swinging the rope a little faster, only for her foot to get caught, resulting in the greenette tumbling to the ground. "Uh-oh! You okay?!"

"No, I think I broke something," Chika sighed as lay on the ground. "I'll have to go to the hospital, be laid up for days, and be served food in bed..."

"Sorry, Hakozaki. Not gonna work with me," the blonde shook her head as pulled Chika up by the armpits. "Lady Vert warned me you'd try something like this sooner or later..."

"Oh dear sister, how could you betray me like this?!" the Oracle wailed in distress.

"Come on, let's try it again," Peach instructed as she handed the jump rope back to her companion, who reluctantly started again...

A little later, the group was gathered in the weight-lifting room, with Nisa working a pair of dumbbells, while Chika was trying the bench press.

"Okay, so at least you can lift the bare bar without any problems," A-Mac nodded. "Now let's add 10 pounds." Peach promptly retrieved two 5-pound weights, she and A-Mac sliding them on opposite ends of the barbell. "Alright, now let's try ten repetitions."

Chika groaned as she began to lift the barbell up and down again...

"47... 48... 49... 50!" Nicole grunted, clinking the dumbbells together as she set them down, sweat visible on her forehead. "Phew... think I'm making some progress now!"

"Just don't overwork yourself," Peach cautioned. "I did that a few times in high school, and boy did I pay for it..."

*A few days later...*

Chika slowed to a stop at the foot of the hill, bending over with her hands on her knees as she panted heavily. "See, Chika?" Peach encouraged, "You're already able to make it this far without fainting! Won't be much longer before we attack the hill!"

"Easy for... you to say..." the greenette gasped out. To her, the hill still looked like an insurmountable mountain to her...

"Well, we just need to work out your legs more!" Peashy pointed out as she put a hand on her companion's shoulder. "C'mon, let's go meet up with Nicole and get some breakfast, then it's off to the gym again!"

"I swear... you are... enjoying this... way too much..." the Oracle grunted as she and Peach walked off...

*Back at the gym...*

"C'mon, pump those legs!" Peashy ordered. "I'm on a bike too this time, so there's no excuse!"

"Right, right," Chika grunted as she tried to cycle faster, though it was nothing compared to her companion, who was zipping along on the second-highest setting...

Meanwhile, on the other side of the gym, Nisa was doing one-handed pushups. "37... 38... 39... One more push!" A-Mac encouraged, his girlfriend barely managing push-up number 40 before slowly collapsing onto her side. "Alright, good! Let's try for 45 or 50 next time..."

"Fifty next time," the bluenette gasped out. "Peach isn't letting... Chika slack off... so neither can I..."

*A few more days later...*

"I'm surprised you let me sleep in a little," Chika muttered as she and Peach got dressed in their tracksuits.

"Well, there was a reason for that..." the blonde replied. "Ah, there you are."

"Huh?!" the Oracle looked up to see none other than Vert herself in a green tracksuit, her hair tied back with a green bow, forming a low ponytail. "L-Lady Vert?!"

"Yes, Chika," the CPU confirmed. "I thought I would join you this time, if that's all right."

"Why certainly, big sister! You're always more than welcome to join us!" Chika exclaimed happily.

"Well, what are we waiting for?" Peach said with a big grin. "Let's go!"

(Music- 'Gonna Fly Now'- Theme of Rocky)

And so the trio began their jog, starting out the back door of the Basilicom, passing a few cars as they went down the street... "Hey, go get 'em, Lady Vert!" one driver encouraged, the goddess briefly waving back.

The trio then turned down a street leading through a farmer's market, several of said farmers and patrons cheering upon recognition of their CPU, her Oracle and her bodyguard. "It's never this noisy... when it's just me and Peach..." Chika observed.

"Well, we are starting a little later," Peashy pointed out. Leaving the market behind, the three way made their way to the park...

"Hey, wait for me!" a familiar voice called out, Nisa quickly catching up to the trio. "Starting a bit late, huh?"

"Vert wanted to join us," Peach stated. "Can't say no to her..."

"Yeah well, looks like she's not the only one..." Nisa said as she looked back, the others realizing that a small group of children were now on their tail.

"It's a long route, kids!" Peashy cried out to them.

"Yes, don't feel ashamed if you can't keep up!" Vert added. However, as they went down a two-way street, the group of kids seemed to slowly grow larger and larger... Going through another park, Nisa and Peach leapt over some of the benches, while Vert and Chika simply went around.

As they emerged into an open area, Peach yelled, "We're almost to the steep hill! Start picking up the pace!"

"Right!" Nisa grunted as she and the others began to run faster...

"Go! Go! Go!" the kids encouraged, even as they were slowly outpaced and left behind...

(Don't look at the top! Don't look at the top!) Chika thought to herself as she began to pound her way up the hill... Peach reached the top first, Nicole close behind. Vert made it a few seconds later... (Don't let your sister down now!) Her pace was slowing, but she was still moving upward... just as her energy ran out, she crested the top!

(~Gonna fly now...! Flying high now...!~)

"You did it!" Peashy and Vert cried in unison, catching Chika as she fell to her knees. Not long after, several of the children from earlier also joined, cheering and jumping for joy.

(~Gonna fly... fly... fly... fly!~)

"I did it...! I did it!" Chika gasped happily, tears of joy at the corners of her eyes as Vert drew her into a gentle embrace.

"Chi-ka! Chi-ka! Chi-ka! Chi-ka!" the kids chanted in unison.

The Oracle would soon look back on this day, and realize how glad she was that Peach had pushed her so hard...

*Episode 55- End*