The Misadventures of Hyperdimension Peashy

Episode 68

by Derald Snyder

*Overlord's Castle*

"YOU IDIOT!" Etna yelled as she repeatedly bopped the Majin prison guard over the head with the blunt side of her Elder Spear. "How could you fall asleep on the job and let that human magician escape?!"

"I-I'm so sorry, Master Etna!" the Majin wailed as he sat hunched on the floor, covering his head with his arms. "I truly am! P-please don't kill me!" The repeated blows stopped, only for the demon to double over as Etna thrust the business end of her spear into his gut!

"Next time it'll go all the way through!" the redhead warned. "Now get out of my sight, I don't wanna see your face for a long time!" The Majin promptly scrambled away as fast as he could, one hand favoring his stomach.

"Nicely done, Master Etna," Rayna said as she walked up, looking refreshed, her wings no longer bound, Sicily alongside her.

"You're not off the hook, either, ya know," Etna muttered as she turned to face her Cleric. "After all, it was your own stupidity that got you beaten and captured by that big-breasted goddess!"

"M-my sincerest apologies," the fallen angel bowed her head in remorse. "It won't happen again."

"It shouldn't have happened to begin with!" Sicily jumped in. "Etna, why aren't you helping Big Brother with ruling the netherworld? Are you two still fighting over that pudding?"

"Pudding? Oh geesh, that was so many games ago now..." Etna sweat-dropped. "That's not it at all, Sicily... we got over that issue awhile ago..."

"Hey, what's all the commotion over here?" A high-pitched bratty voice spoke up, Laharl himself walking into the room. "I heard something about pudding, did someone steal it again? Because it wasn't me this time!"

"BIG BROTHER!" Sicily cried in joy, leaping and tackling the young Overlord to the floor in a big hug. "Oh, I'm so glad to see you again! I missed you SO much!"

"Wh-Sicily?!" Laharl gasped in surprise. "Where the hell have you been?! You didn't even send a letter or anything!"

"Here and there and everywhere!" Sicily replied, tears streaming down her face. "But now I'm finally home...!"

A *click!* was suddenly heard, the two siblings turning to Etna, who now had her mobile device in hand. "Hey, what can I say? It's a Kodak moment!"

"DAMN IT, ETNA!" Laharl leaped up in anger, his eyes glowing yellow. "You erase that picture this instant!"

"Make me, Prince!" the redhead taunted, turning and running off.

"Get back here!" the Overlord screamed as he gave chase, leaving Sicily and Rayna behind.

"Big Brother... why are you so upset at Etna taking a picture of us?" the demon angel sighed.

"Well, you know Etna, she's gonna use it as blackmail to undermine his projected 'evil and merciless Overlord' image," Rayna supplied. "Well, c'mon Sicily, I might as well help you clean out your room so you've got a place to sleep again. Least I can do, after you pulled my fat out of the fryer..."

"Okay!" Sicily agreed. "And when that's done, I need to tell Etna to stop her plans for conquering's Nisa's home!"

"Good luck with that," the brunette rolled her eyes...

*A few days later...*

"First-Class Petty Officer Adrian-118 reporting for duty!" the soldier stated as he walked up to Vert and saluted, clad in a new bright-red armor suit.

"Former Staff Sergeant Peach-216 reporting as well!" Peashy copied her fiancee's salute, also suited up in her white armor.

"At ease, you two," Vert said with a slight smile. "I see that A-Mac and Nisa are with you," she observed, the Hero of Justice and her boyfriend clad in blue and yellow-colored armor, respectively. "Does this mean your training is complete?"

"Well, it's not so hard to move around in this anymore," A-Mac spoke up.

"He actually got the better of me in our last sparring match," Nicole appended. "Granted, I wasn't going all-out, but still..."

"Anyway, where's Chika at?" Peach inquired.

"I'm coming, just a moment!" the Oracle's voice was heard. A few moments later she stepped into the room, clad in her sleek dark-grey armor, through she carried her helmet in one hand. "Oh my, quite the rainbow we have here... I suppose it's time for our first patrol?"

"That it is, Oracle," Adrian nodded.

"I already have a few people searching through Leanbox City discreetly, to try and find any covert agents sent by Etna," Vert stated. "Nothing so far, though."

"Yeah, well, I didn't know that Rayna was Etna's minion until she ran me through," Peach said as she put a hand behind her head. "At least I got her back for that..."

"Well, before we head out, we need to come up with superhero code names!" Nisa exclaimed. "I've already thought of mine, I'm going to be Blue Falcon!"

"Blue Falcon...?" Adrian turned to the bluenette. "I think you're bordering on copyright infringement, Nicole..."

"Maybe if we were in Lowee, and I was a captain of some sort!" Nisa retorted. "But I'm not, so it's all good!"

"I'm gonna be Yellow Tiger!" A-Mac declared. "After all, 'Eye of the Tiger' is one of my all-time favorite songs! It's what inspired me to get into kickboxing in the first place!"

"You don't say," Adrian muttered. "I don't know what animal to associate myself with, though..."

"How about a bear?" Vert suggested. "After all, like real bears, you're quite friendly normally, but you're also merciless when it comes to protecting what's important to you."

"Yeah, but 'Red Bear' doesn't sound very good..." the soldier sweat-dropped.

"Perhaps 'Red Grizzly' would work better?" Chika ventured.

"...Okay, I can live with that."

"So how about me, then?" Peashy asked. "Got any suggestions, Nicole?"

"Hmmm..." Nisa put a hand to her chin in thought. "How about... 'White Gorilla'?"

"W-White Gorilla?! You're making me a dumb primate?!" Peach protested.

"Now, Peach..." Adrian put a hand on her shoulder. "Gorillas are really only dumb compared to humans. Compared to other animals, they're actually pretty intelligent. You're no genius, for sure, but you're not a complete idiot, either..."

"...I guess," the blonde conceded. "Fine, White Gorilla it is."

"So that just leaves Chika," Vert said. "Do you have any ideas for a code name?"

"Not really," the greenette shrugged.

"How about 'Black Raven'?" A-Mac suggested.

"What?! But isn't a raven an omen of misfortune?"

"Right," Nicole agreed, "but the misfortune will be on our enemies!"

Chika pondered this for a moment. "Well, if you put it that way... very well, then." She then put up her hair into a ponytail before sliding her helmet on. "Well then, shall we be off? ...oh, but are we all riding in Adrian's car?"

"I just got my motorbike back," Arthur said, "and Nicole'll be riding with me. The rest of you will take the Jeep."

"Yep, that's how we got here," Peashy concurred.

"Very well, I shall ride with Adrian. Just try not to drive too rough," Chika said.

"You watch too many action movies," Adrian shook his head. "Anyway, move out, Armored Rangers!"

"Right!"

*And so, a few minutes later...*

Adrian's Jeep drove down the road, Peach riding shotgun and Chika in the backseat. Meanwhile, A-Mac was following on his motorcycle, Nisa holding onto him from behind.

"Seems pretty normal out here today," Peach observed. Just then an alarm started clanging in the distance, causing her to sweat-drop. "I stand corrected."

"It sounds like it's coming from the local branch of Fourth Third Bank," Chika supplied.

"A bank robbery, huh? Might be a good one for us to warm up on," Adrian mused, turning down the street to the bank, Arthur and Nicole following... Soon, they stopped a block away from the bank entrance, a lone car idling outside.

"Three-to-one that's the getaway car," Peach said as they unbuckled, their companions stopping and dismounting from their ride.

"S-so we're gonna try and foil th-the bank robbery?" A-Mac said, slightly nervous.

"Relax, Arthur. This is nothing for a Hero of Justice!" Nisa encouraged.

"So what do we do?" Chika asked.

"You got your gun on you, Nicole?" Adrian asked.

"Right here!" Nisa held up her Prinny Gun.

"Okay, here's what we're gonna do. Peach will give Arthur and Nicole a boost up to the rooftop, and they'll make their way to just above the bank entrance. When the robbers come out, you open fire, Nicole. Then Arthur, you jump down and land on top of one of them. Meanwhile, the rest of us will ram the car in my Jeep so they don't escape. Got it?"

"Right!" everyone agreed.

"Okay, let's go! Peashy, you're up first!"

"Right!" the white-clad Ranger nodded, kneeling down and holding out her hands. "Don't be afraid, A-Mac, it's not the first time I've done this!"

"O-okay," A-Mac nodded as he put a foot in his sister's right hand, while Nisa did the same on the left. Peach then thrust up with all her might, the two sailing high into the air! Nisa made a three-point landing on the roof, while A-Mac came down on his elbows. "Man, good thing I'm wearing this armor, or I'd be sore right now!"

"C'mon Arthur, hurry!" Nisa beckoned her boyfriend, the two making their way to above the bank entrance. Just as they got in position, two robbers came out with sacks of cash and armed with machine guns. "Take this!" the bluenette declared as she fired on them with her gun, the explosive ammo causing the thieves to stumble about! "Now, Arthur!"

"Yaaaaahhh!" A-Mac screamed in terror as he fell off the roof, thankfully managing to land on one of the robbers, knocking him out straight away! The other robber pointed his gun at the young man, only to be distracted by Adrian's Jeep suddenly plowing into his co-felon's car! Arthur managed to stand up, grabbing the gun's barrel with his left hand and giving the thug a body blow with his right, then following up with an uppercut and yanking the gun away!

"Why you!" the robber swung back at A-Mac, who leaned backward to dodge, only to stumble and fall over the thief he'd knocked out earlier! But before his opponent could take advantage, he was tackled by Peashy, who pinned him to the ground and punched him in the head until he went limp.

Meanwhile, the driver had attempted to escape, only for Chika to throw her spear and pierce one of his tires, causing him go out of control and crash into a lamppost! Adrian's Jeep pulled alongside, the man himself quickly getting out and pointing his assault rifle at the driver! "Alright, keep your hands where I can see 'em! Get out of the car!" Realizing resistance was futile, the would be robber did as told, getting tossed to the ground as soon as he stepped out! "Stay on the ground! You're under arrest for accessory to larceny!"

Just then, a few police cars drove up, one parking by the getaway car while the other two stopped by the bank entrance. "Alright, what's going on here?!" the NPC officer said as he got out. "Who gave you army punks the right to play vigilante?!"

"Officer, please, calm yourself," Chika said in a soothing tone as she removed her helmet. "There is no need for testosterone here..."

"O-Oracle Hakozaki?!" the policeman gasped. "W-with all due respect, what's the meaning of this?"

"Quite simple. I, along with Lady Vert's bodyguard and a few others, have formed a strike force designed specifically for countering Demon Lord Etna and her demonic hordes," the greenette explained. "We were on our first patrol when we heard the alarm, so our leader decided to use the opportunity to test our teamwork in real-life scenario. I assure you, we have no intention of stepping on the police's feet..."

"We'll gladly let you take these dirtbags into custody," Adrian appended as he picked up the getaway driver by the scruff of his neck and pushed him over to the officer.

"I-I'll go willingly!" the thug promised, not resisting as the policeman promptly cuffed him and read him his rights.

Meanwhile, Peach had used her position as Vert's bodyguard to smooth things over with the other officers, explaining the situation while Nisa and A-Mac sat off to one side. "You okay?" Nisa asked her boyfriend, both of them having doffed their helmets.

"Yeah," Arthur sighed, "But jumping from the roof like that was terrifying... I hope this doesn't become a regular thing on this team. Man, what if I'd missed?"

"But you didn't," Nicole countered, "and you were doing pretty well against that other guy, until you tripped. Just gotta be more aware of your surroundings, that's all..."

"Right," the young man nodded. "But I think I'm starting to understand what Adrian said, about not playing hero all by yourself..."

"Well, back in the day, I was far more effective fighting against ASIC after I teamed up with Nepgear and the others," Nisa pointed out. "Same held true when I was fighting alongside other demons in the netherworld..."

"Well, I'd say that's mission accomplished!" Peach walked up to the duo, the robbers having been taken into custody by the police. "Good work, bro. Still got room for improvement, but you did OK."

"Thanks, sis," Arthur nodded gratefully. "Just hope I can hold my own on this team... all I've really got are my kickboxing and parkour skills..."

"I don't think Adrian would've put you on the team if he thought you'd be useless," Peashy countered. "But if you think you need something a little extra... here."

"Your baton?" A-Mac said as he accepted the weapon. "Are you sure?"

"Got plenty more where that came from, not to mention my shock baton," the blonde shrugged with a smile. "At least it should help you against swords and spears..."

The yellow-clad Ranger bowed his head, before nodding solemnly. "I'll take good care of it."

*MarvelousAQL's Apartment*

"Wow, Armored Rangers, huh?" MarvelousAQL muttered as she watched the news of the foiled bank robbery. "That sounds pretty rad... what do you think, kitty?"

"Rowr."

"Oh right, you don't talk. Silly me," Marvy giggled as she pet Blacktail on the head. "You just seem so smart for a cat..."

(Probably because I am,) the cat thought to herself. (So, Armored Rangers... clearly a Prism Rangers ripoff. Wouldn't be surprised if that Nisa came up with the idea...) She then rolled over so her 'owner' could rub her belly. (And this happy lady is supposed to be a ninja? Master Etna's gonna have no trouble with this world if you're the best warrior they have to offer...)

*To be continued...*