Disclaimer: see part 1
Touch'
By Random1377
Part 4 – Guardians
Shinji stared straight ahead, his expression an almost perfect replication of Rei's emotionless stare as NERV's best bone and tissue specialist, a woman by the name of Doctor Shizune, carefully probed his right hand with a device that bore a complicated name, but to him looked like nothing more than a thin metal pick with a wickedly sharp end.
"He should have been brought to me immediately," Shizune was saying, her voice disagreeable as she flipped the pick over and tapped the back of Shinji's hand smartly with the rounded handle, drawing a pained hiss from the boy. "It doesn't look like there's any nerve damage, but until the induction test I can't be a hundred percent sure."
Leaning against the medical table Shinji was sitting on, Ritsuko kept her arms folded over her breasts, trying not to sound sharp as she replied, "I brought him to you as soon as I learned what happened, Doctor, now stop beating around the bush – will this affect his piloting or not?"
Shizune glanced at the remains of the cast she had cut off of the Third Child twenty minutes prior, and sighed. "No," she said calmly, "not if we isolate the capitate and trapezoid… but that monster," her eyes flicked again to the cast, "won't do well if it gets saturated."
Glancing at Shinji from the corner of her eye, Ritsuko whispered, "Is microcasting it an option?"
The medical doctor frowned. "A microcast would allow him full mobility," she said reluctantly, "but you know how painful they are to install, Doctor Akagi. I don't know that I'm comfortable inserting one on a child of this age."
Ritsuko smiled sardonically. "Fortunately for me, your comfort is not my concern, Doctor," she said coolly. "Please keep in mind what this Child does for us, and make the preparations immediately."
"Of course," Shizune replied, inclining her head deferentially, "I can have everything ready in two hours."
"Why so long?" Ritsuko asked immediately. "It's not a complicated procedure."
Shizune set her instrument to the side and rested her chin on her palm, staring thoughtfully into Shinji's face as she answered, "It's not, but I'd like to have Doctor Itsuki, our fragmentation specialist, consulted on the installation… and I'd like the child to have at least a LITTLE time to prepare himself." Leaning back in her chair, she raised her voice a bit and said, "Shinji, do you know what a microcast is?"
For a moment, the Third made no reply, then – keeping his eyes fixed on the wall – he slowly shook his head, once to the left, once to the right, before becoming still again.
"Shinji," Shizune said firmly, "I need your full attention. Are you listening?" When Shinji nodded and continued staring straight ahead, the dark-haired woman rubbed her eyes. "A microcast is a small metal plate, Shinji," she said softly, "or in your case, two small metal plates – one for each of the bones you broke. They will slide between your fingers and be anchored to the bones in your hand, keeping them still while allowing your muscles to move freely. Do you understand all of this?"
Shinji blinked, finally bringing his attention to the woman's face. "Anchored?" he echoed dully, his eyes clearing a bit as this word sunk in.
Shizune nodded. "Yes, Shinji, anchored," she said gently. "Each plate has a series of eight metal pins, each slightly larger than a hypodermic needle. They will be inserted into both sides of the bones in your hand – two on each side of the break, front and back – to prevent any worsening of the injury."
"There's no other way, Shinji," Ritsuko interjected matter-of-factly. "Since you need to have your hand fully operational to pilot, and there's just no way you can wear a regular cast, this is the only viable solution. You can understand that, right?"
Staring steadily into Ritsuko's eyes, Shinji whispered, "Will it hurt?"
"Yes," Ritsuko replied immediately, "quite a bit."
Shinji nodded, bringing his eyes back to the wall as if the conversation no longer held any interest for him. "I understand."
These pilots, Shizune thought with a shiver, excusing herself to go prepare for the operation, they push them so hard. He's becoming like that Ayanami girl… a walking, talking robot with no reason to live, other than killing angels.
Ritsuko ignored the woman's departure, her eyes fixed on Shinji's face as the word 'pressure' ricocheted around in her mind, giving rise to a dangerously complicated plan. Get a grip, she told herself firmly, it's only been a day since… since SHE knocked on his door and ruined everything – there's no need to get all bent out of shape and start hurting people…
She smiled coldly as she recalled the lack of surprise in the First Child's face when she met her at the front door of Gendou's apartment.
Of course, she thought pragmatically, there's no harm in laying groundwork, is there?
"You ok, Shinji?"
Shinji nodded slowly. "Yes, ma'am," he said quietly, "I'm fine."
He blinked, though, as he felt something soft and warm lay gently on top of his uninjured hand, finally turning his attention to the blonde as she gave him a gentle, friendly pat. "Would you like to get some dinner after this?" she asked him, her voice taking on a warm, soothing quality as she met his eyes straight on.
Uncomfortably, Shinji shifted on the medical table, his cheeks coloring as he showed the first signs of any emotion past self-loathing in twenty-four hours, when Rei had quietly rebuked him. "I d-don't think-"
"Shh," Ritsuko cut in, lightly stroking the back of his hand with her fingertips as she leaned a little closer to him. "Don't get the wrong impression, Shinji," she whispered, bringing her hand up to his chin and forcing him to meet her eyes as he tried to look away, "I just want to help you."
Shinji swallowed, finding himself intimately close to the attractive blonde. "Wh-what do you mean?" he stammered, swallowing as Ritsuko licked her lips and brought herself closer still.
"I know about your problem," she whispered, bringing her mouth right next to Shinji's ear. "You want her back… don't you…?"
With a slight jerk, Shinji gave an uneven nod, knowing instantly who the doctor was talking about. "She hates me," he blurted, "Doctor Akagi, she-"
Ritsuko pressed her forefinger lightly to the boy's lips, grinning internally as the boy went rigidly still. "I've known Rei for a long time, Shinji," she breathed, going in for the kill, "let's be friends, ok? Friends help each other… right?"
"Er, right," Shinji said uncertainly, completely unsure of how to react to this situation.
"Right," Ritsuko repeated. "So I'll help you get back together with Rei… and when I need a little favor, you'll help me, right?"
Shinji nodded eagerly, his brows drawing together as he murmured, "But what kind of favor could I-"
Raising a hand, Ritsuko cut him off. "Oh, I don't need anything right now," she said lightly, pulling back and smiling brightly at the boy's nervous, but hopeful expression. "Just do your best with Rei, and remember that your friend might need a hand with something some day, alright?"
Biting his bottom lip as if he knew something was not quite right, Shinji averted his eyes. "Alright, Doctor Akagi."
"Ritsuko," the blonde said firmly, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze, "we're friends now – call me Ritsuko."
That's right, Ritsuko thought as the boy gave her a tentative smile, I'll help you, and when the time comes… you'll help me. She leaned back against the table and refolded her arms to wait for Doctor Shizune to return, a thin smile curving the corners of her mouth as she whispered her opinion of this new arrangement.
"Perfect."
( 0 0 0 )
Touji Suzuhara approached the place where Asuka was eating lunch as carefully as a soldier approaching an unexploded shell in the middle of a battlefield. Easy, he told himself, trying to appear nonchalant as he glanced around and casually strolled towards the bench where she was having her bento. Just don't set her off, and she won't go off. Yeah right, who am I kidding? Like she needs a reason!
He hesitated as he spotted the odd expression on the redhead's normally smug face, but as Ayanami had proven to be preoccupied, and Shinji was the last person he wanted to talk to about it, he really had no choice.
Asuka was literally the only person he could talk to about his current situation.
"Hey, Asuka…" he said, making sure she saw him before he spoke. Nothing pissed the girl off more than being surprised – a fact he had learned the hard way after sneaking up beside her one day and yelling her name.
Sometimes, late at night, he imagined he could still feel the bruises.
Asuka looked at him, frowning slightly. "Well, my least favorite stooge," she grumbled. "What do you want?" her frown faded, though, as she saw the hesitant look on the boy's face – an expression completely out of place on his normally cocksure features. "What is it?" she asked, her tone softening just a bit.
"I… I need to talk to you," Touji said, his voice hitching slightly. "I…"
He didn't know how to say it. He wasn't even sure why he wanted to say it. Perhaps it was for the comfort of talking to someone who knew what he was going through, or rather, what he was about to go through… he was not sure, but he had to tell someone about it, or else he was going to go crazy.
Asuka was not sure how to address the situation. She did not actively dislike the boy, but he was not high on her favorites list. She knew that Hikari thought he was nice, but that she would never do anything about it (Hell, the girl was going to offer him lunch today, but had chickened out at the last minute). Asuka just saw him as being a goofball.
She looked at him carefully. He looked from side to side, fidgeting with the keys in his pocket. Man, she thought, what is bugging him? Guess I'll never know if I don't ask…
"What is it, Suzuhara?" she asked, her tone far more polite than even she had expected.
Touji swallowed. Kimiko he thought firmly, this is all for Kimiko… don't ever forget that!
Abruptly, he sat down next to her, staring down at the ground between his feet as he whispered, "I've, umm, I've been chosen… I'm a Child."
Asuka looked at him blankly. "Well of course you're a child," she muttered, beginning to think he was kidding, or possibly insane. "Why else would you be in school? I mean, sure, you're not a genius, but-" she cut off abruptly, noticing the way he had emphasized the last word of his sentence.
Seeing understanding dawn in the girl's eyes, Touji nodded.
Asuka really didn't know what to say at first, but she quickly found that she was not happy with the idea, and did not bother to try and hide it from him. "Why the hell would they choose you?" she demanded, her tone dripping with disgust. "You can barely tie your own shoes – what makes anyone think you can handle an EVA?"
"Hey," Touji said defensively, "I'm just as confused as you! I can play ball, man, but fighting angels and stuff? That's not me."
"No kidding," Asuka grumbled. "It's probably a mistake."
To her surprise, Touji leaned forward, eagerly asking, "Do you think it could be?"
Asuka frowned, ultimately averting her eyes. "Probably not," she said neutrally. "Anyway, why would you think that I'd talk to you about it?"
"Well, Shinji's all moody, so I can't talk to him," Touji said reasonably, "and lately, Ayanami's been even quieter than before," he grinned suddenly, "and you're always saying that you're the best, so…"
Snorting, Asuka muttered, "Flattery won't get you anywhere, Suzuhara."
Touji's smile fell away. "Seriously, though," he whispered, "you're the only one I can talk to, Souryu."
Asuka's nose wrinkled for a moment, as if the idea of having a prolonged conversation with the jock was dreadfully distasteful. "I guess," she sighed after a moment. "Since you're a pilot, it's not classified or anything."
Touji chuckled weakly. "Never thought I'd have to worry about stuff being classified… it was always Kensuke that wanted to play solider and shit like that." He looked at her from the corner of his eyes. "So umm… what's it like when you sync?"
"Well," the redhead said, trying to put the feeling into words, "It's kind of like when you first wake up from a really strong dream. Your body doesn't feel like it's really working right at first, then things slowly start to fit together, you know? Like you're sliding up into your body or something…"
"Wow."
"Yeah," Asuka nodded, warming up a bit as Touji turned his full attention to her, "and that's not even a great description. Umm let's see, ok, it's kind of…"
As they talked, Asuka found that Hikari was right. Touji proved to be smart, quick on the draw, and even witty on occasion. Asuka's opinion of him changed marginally as they sat through lunch period and into the afternoon, talking about EVA, and eventually more mundane topics. Though she would not say she was prepared to marry the guy, she definitely found that he was enjoyable company – when he was not being a stooge, of course.
Besides, she thought as they finally rose to leave, I have to work with him… might as well make the best of it.
( 0 0 0 )
Ritsuko had finally stopped crying, managing to hold herself to the occasional whimper as she lay perfectly still on Gendou's bed. The elder Ikari was not a gentle man, and this characteristic also applied to his lovemaking, as she could currently attest. Usually, he was able to restrain himself and the blonde doctor would remain unharmed…
…but this was not one of those times.
He's so angry lately… she thought, wiping a tear from her face as discretely as she could.
Nothing upset him more than showing weakness – nothing.
Usually his anger translated into passion in the bedroom, so Ritsuko generally got the benefits of his unrest… but occasionally it translated into violence, and she found herself getting the short end of the stick.
She touched her throat and winced slightly, knowing that it was bruised.
Sometimes when they were intimate, her would call her Yui. Those were the best times for her. Even though she disliked the thought of him imagining that she was someone else, he had always been gentle with her on those rare occasions. Once he had even called her Rei. That was a bad night. He had been furious, as if it was her fault, and had made her swear to never tell another living soul on pain of death – a threat she wholeheartedly believed.
Tonight his mind seemed occupied with the thoughts of his son and the First Child.
Ritsuko could tell his anger was deepening. She knew him well enough to know when a big blowup was coming, in spite of the fact that Rei was currently avoiding Shinji on her own. At least Misato's on her way to Matsushiro, she thought, maybe when we have Unit 03 in our hands, things will be a bit calmer.
How anyone could hold that much animosity against his or her own child, Ritsuko could not understand. She had not been on bad terms with her mother, but they had certainly had their differences… however, she could not imagine her mother having as much negative emotion towards her as Gendou had towards Shinji.
If he knew I was pushing them back together, she thought with a streak of true fear. God, I doubt they'd find the body…
She comforted herself with the knowledge that her clumsy plotting did have a point, if she could only survive long enough to see it implemented.
"Hmm…"
Ritsuko trembled as Gendou turned away from the window and started back towards the bed. His intentions were quite clear… and the results of his rage were clearly visible when they were through, requiring her to wear a turtleneck and her full-length lab coat for a week afterwards to hide the bruises.
( 0 0 0 )
Shinji moved Unit 01carefully into position, frowning lightly as he surveyed the terrain. "This is the spot," he muttered to himself, "wonder what this is all about…"
His orders had been simple – move to grid coordinates X 5432 by Y 3423 and await further orders. That was it.
"All Units reporting that they are in position," Maya announced over the tac-net. "Please stand by."
Biting his lip, Shinji considered opening a link to Unit 00, but he discarded the idea quickly. This isn't the place; he thought astutely, I'll talk to her later.
Ritsuko had outlined, very carefully, the steps she felt he should take to get Rei back – the first of which involved abject begging… but so far, Shinji had not managed to find a time when Rei was alone and he had the nerve at the same time.
I can't just grab her and kiss her, he thought tiredly, idly drumming his fingers on Unit 01's right control yoke, what right do I have to treat her like nothing happened? God, do I want to, though! …I can't believe I ruined everything. I just need to figure out how to get back to the way we were.
Secretly, Shinji felt that they would never quite manage to be exactly the way they were at first, but there was a small part of him – the one that made him smile at the end of romance movies – that believed that there was potential for things to be even better than they were before.
If only he could find a way to make it happen.
"Stand by for update," Maya's voice called, sounding tense.
Thoughts of relationships and romance were blasted from Shinji's mind as his father came onto the tac-net, calmly outlining the current situation for the three pilots.
"An explosion at Mount Matsushiro?" Shinji said, leaning closer to the monitor in his urgency, "Is Misato ok?"
"Contact hasn't been reestablished," Asuka answered hesitantly, "weren't you listening? Just relax, Third Child… just relax."
"Well… how can we fight an angel without her? We need her!" Shinji tensed in the pilot's seat, waiting for a visual on the target.
"Commander Ikari will lead this operation," Maya informed them, "everything's gonna be fine."
I hope Misato's ok… Asuka thought as the com system went quiet, mama always said not to go to bed after harsh words, and this is a lot more extreme than going to bed.
She tried to follow her own advice and relax, wishing Misato's face was not so vivid in her memory. Words echoed in her ears as she recalled their heated argument the night before the purple-haired woman left for Matsushiro.
She's wrong, Asuka told herself firmly, Shinji NEEDS to know that his friend's a pilot! Touji doesn't want to tell him, and I can understand why – Shinji would try to talk him out of it… but Misato should have told him as soon as Touji was on the plane to the testing facility! She just-
"Visual confirmation received from Mount Nobi," Aoba's voice came over the network, cutting into the redhead's thoughts, "putting it onscreen."
Shinji gasped as a black figure lurched around the edge of a mountain range.
"Is that…?"
His father's voice came to him, sounding cool and unimpressed. "Correct. It has been reclassified as an angel, and must be destroyed. Prepare to engage."
In the control room, Gendou watched Unit 03 slowly approach his son's location. Putting Unit 01 in the point position was a bit hasty, perhaps, he thought coldly, but the boy must be shown that he is NOT the one in control.
"But… what about the pilot?" Shinji asked, reluctantly bringing his rifle up. "We need to save him."
Gendou's voice grew ten degrees colder. "The pilot's life is irrelevant. Only defeating the angels matters… do what you're told."
"Shinji," Asuka's voice snapped urgently over the tactical network, "the Fourth Child – the pilot of Unit 03… it's Suzuhara, do you hear me? It's Touji!"
Shinji's eyes went wide, but before he could reply, Unit 03 threw its head back and roared, a chillingly human sound that echoed across the mountainside, slamming into Unit 01's audio pickups with almost physical force. A moment later, Unit 03 lowered its head and charged, its eerie white eyes narrowing even as its jaw cracked open in an obscene grin.
"No!" Shinji cried, instinctively raising Unit 01's right hand and willing his AT into existence. "Touji! Touji are you in there? Can you hear me?"
I can't believe this is happening, he thought desperately, feeling a drop of sweat slip down the side of his face as Unit 03 grew closer and closer, Why didn't he tell me? Why didn't Misato tell me? Don't think… don't think… just get him out, nothing else matters right now.
Unit 03 grunted, skidding and skittering to an awkward stop just a few feet short of running into Unit 01's AT field. It snarled, a low rumbling sound in the back of its throat, and lowered to all fours, pacing back and forth like a caged lion in front of Unit 01, clearly looking for a way through the shimmering shield as Shinji kept trying to reach his friend.
"Fight it, Touji!" the Third yelled, praying that the boy could hear him. "Concentrate! Take the EVA back – I know you can do it!"
Suddenly, Unit 03 stopped growling and tilted its head to the side as if listening to something.
Shinji watched, hope growing in him. "That's it!" he called excitedly, "That's it, fight it! Come on, just listen to my voice, stay with me!"
The other EVA seemed to be confused, taking a hesitant step backwards and shaking its head from side to side as a low, dog-like whine resonated inside its chest.
"Yes!" Shinji yelled. "Fight, Touji, don't let it win!"
With perceived victory within his sights, Shinji Ikari then made one of the biggest, and nearly the last, mistakes of his life – he lowered his AT field.
The black mecha was on him in a second, pouncing with a frighteningly human roar of glee as it brought Unit 01 to the ground. It tore the rifle from the purple machine's hands and smashed it against the robot's head, shaking Shinji in the entry plug and sending a huge stab of pain through his microcasted hand as it banged against the control yokes. A thick, blue liquid began oozing from Unit 03's gaping jaws, falling onto Unit 01's arm and causing it to spasm.
Shinji gasped as he felt his arm lose feeling… then become gradually warmer, as if he was standing too close to an oven set to 450.
"The angel is invading Unit 01!" Maya cried out.
"Sever the arm," came Gendou's terse reply.
Maya just gaped at the order. "But… his nerve connections are still active," she stammered, turning back to her keyboard, "give me a minute to-"
"Cut it off!" Gendou replied, secretly pleased by this turn of events.
Maybe this can serve as a lesson for the boy… he thought with a faint smile. Perhaps in the future he will be more obedient.
The heat in Shinji's arm vanished… along with all other feeling, as the explosive charge in the Unit's shoulder went off. "AAAAHHH!" he yelled as all of his senses registered the loss of the limb. Darkness threatened to overtake him as the pain mounted higher and higher, a punishing drone assailing his senses as he unconsciously flexed his (missing) hand into a fist. "Father…" he gasped, trying to bring Unit 01 to its feet.
Unit 03 regarded the purple mecha's struggles for a moment – like a cake decorator surveying a finely crafted centerpiece… then, as if satisfied with what it saw, it let out another of its all-too-human roars, shaking the ground under its feet as it brought its hands together and reared back. With a grunt of effort, it brought its fists smashing down against Unit 01's chest, knocking it back to the ground. Not content, it began pounding on Unit 01 furiously, hitting it again and again.
Within the entry plug, Shinji was rocked by the impact. His mind flashed back to the battle with the first angel and the horrible pain in his eye as its energy lance had finally pierced Unit 01's brain case. What will it feel like when Unit 01's heart gets crushed? he thought deliriously. Will my heart stop too? …if Unit 01 dies, will I die too?
Somehow, he did not think he would have to wait too long to find out.
( 0 0 0 )
In her entry plug, Rei listened intently to the battle with a steadily growing look of frustration on her normally placid face. I was told to hold my position… she told herself, flinching as another crunch echoed over the tac-net, I was told to hold-
"Cut it off!"
"AAAAHHH!"
"Shinji!"
Rei gritted her teeth.
I should be where he is… she thought agonizingly. But… but he will only reject me, and I have… orders…
Slowly closing her eyes, she took a deep breath.
I must go to him.
With this thought, Rei began running towards Unit 01's position.
Asuka was already there.
With a scream, the redhead threw her mecha at the possessed Unit as it raised its fists for another hit, slamming into it and knocking it back several hundred yards. Panting from the exertion she yelled, "Shinji, are you ok?"
"Hurts…" Shinji croaked, clutching his shoulder.
It's there, he told himself firmly, It's still THERE, damn it!
Asuka's eyes narrowed as she positioned herself between the two Units. "Hold on," she whispered grimly, "I'll make sure it can't hurt you anymore."
Unit 02 took a menacing step towards the black machine as it regained its feet.
"Careful…" Shinji gasped through the pain, struggling to stay conscious as darkness swam at the corners of his vision, "remember… Touji…"
Asuka frowned. I know… she thought, bracing herself as Unit 03 regained its footing, I'll save him…
She willed Unit 02 forward once more, activating her progressive knife and keeping her eyes on the rogue machine.
…if I can.
( 0 0 0 )
Rei gasped in huge lungs full of LCL as she arrived on the scene, looking down at the mostly intact Unit 01 with a look of relief so profound that it could have defined the word. "Shinji… are you alright?"
"Get him out of here, you useless idiot!" Asuka yelled as Unit 00 approached the downed machine, "I need room."
With a grunt of effort, the redhead drove both of Unit 02's fists forward, connecting with the possessed EVA and knocking it backward to buy Rei more time.
"GO!"
"Yes," Rei agreed readily, crouching to put her Unit's arms around Unit 01.
As the two mecha moved laboriously away, Asuka focused her attention on the angel, bracing herself as it stood once more and trying desperately to figure a way to get the plug free.
She winced as her opponent saw its prize escaping and narrowed its eyes.
Uh oh…
Asuka tried to sidestep as the angel howled and dove towards her, but she was not fast enough to avoid the tackle. "Damn!" she yelled as her Unit hit the ground, her progressive knife flying from her hand. Her cry of fear turned into a gasped of elation, however, as a totally unexpected opportunity presented itself.
With one hand, she slammed the black mecha's head into the ground, reaching over its shoulder and grasping the half-ejected entry plug tightly in her Unit's fist before yanking it fiercely back, pulling it free with a sound like a thousand snapping guitar strings.
Triumphantly, she held the plug aloft, trying to scramble back before Unit 03 could regain its senses.
She was not quite fast enough.
Before she could blink, a black arm shot forward and slapped Unit 03's entry plug from her Unit's hand.
"NO!" Asuka screamed, watching helplessly as the white cylinder spun end over end and impacted against the mountainside with a sickening crunch, spraying LCL everywhere.
Asuka turned her attention back to the almost-grinning visage of Unit 03, her blood boiling as images crashed through her mind. Shinji and Rei, avoiding each others eyes as they passed in NERV's halls… Touji, hesitantly outlining to her the reasons why he had agreed to pilot… Misato, guiltily confessing that the real reason she had wanted to keep Touji's Child status a secret was to save Shinji any more pain.
People she had sworn to protect… people she had failed.
"AaaaaaaaHHHHH!"
With a bloodcurdling scream, Asuka brought her Unit's legs up and kicked hard, catching the creature in the stomach and sending it flying, a cruel grin lighting her face as the black machine spun through the air, coming crashing down with a deafening, bone-jarring crunch.
She got her Unit upright, unconsciously baring her teeth and feeling a flush of anger rise across her face. "That's two of my friends you've hurt," she grated dangerously, "I am so going to fuck you up!"
In her rage, she was not even fully aware that she had openly declared Touji to be her friend, not that she would have questioned it just then… there was pain to inflict. She dove to the left and came up with Unit 02's progressive knife as the angel brought itself up on all fours, stalking forward like a wildcat.
Asuka brandished the knife, gesturing with her other hand. "Come on!" she shouted, "Come get it!"
The angel pawed the ground, then lashed out, catching Asuka off guard as its arm extended and wrapped around Unit 02's throat, but the Second shook off her surprise quickly, struggling to breathe as she gasped, "You'll have to do better than that."
So saying, she brought Unit 02's knife around in a wicked, underhand slash.
The angel screamed in pain and rage as its arm was severed at the elbow, flopping uselessly to the ground as a jet of blood sprayed Unit 02 and darkened its light red paintjob considerably. Relentlessly, Asuka closed the remaining distance between them, hitting Unit 03 squarely between the eyes and driving it to the ground. Quick as a flash, the angel rolled onto its back and swung with its remaining arm, landing a solid punch right under Unit 02's jaw.
The red mecha staggered as Asuka tried to compensate. "I won't lose!" she screamed, kicking the prone Unit in the face, "Not to you! No to anyone!"
The black mecha tried to rise again, but Asuka fell on top of it, raising her knife over her Unit's head and bringing it down on the angel's throat. The machine beneath her convulsed, trying to free itself as she pulled the knife out and brought it down again, this time in the chest.
"DIE!" Asuka shrieked, pulling downward with all of her EVA's strength and parting Unit 03's chest with the vibrating blade. The possessed machine struggled frantically, trying to buck the other robot free, but Asuka was having none of it. Leaving the knife embedded in the other machine's abdomen, she reached in the gap and grabbed handfuls of the now exposed internal organs, squeezing as hard as she could.
Unit 03 screamed, writhing in agony under the red machine's brutal assault and trying ineffectually to push it away.
Asuka never let up for a second, pulling at the internal organs and armor plates with a savage intensity that would have frightened her if she had not been caught up in the desire to kill.
"Asuka!" a voice finally cut though the red haze in her mind, "Asuka, it's… it's dead…"
Asuka looked down at the shattered remains of the EVA. Gott in Himmel, she thought, sickened by the sight of Unit 02's hands covered in gore, what have I done?
( 0 0 0 )
The locker room was quiet as the girls changed, each caught up in thoughts of the battle and the two injured boys – for different reasons, though not as different as people might think.
Asuka finished dressing first, wearing a deep frown on her face as she began walking out.
As she passed, Rei reached out and grabbed her arm. "I… wanted to thank you for saving him," she said haltingly, unused to using such words. "I could not-"
Asuka spun around and slapped the First Child across the face, earning her a small gasp of surprise. "You should have been there for him!" she yelled at the stunned girl. "You don't just let someone you care for get hurt – no matter what your 'orders' are, or how hard things are between you! You fight for them – you protect them! God, I feel sorry for Shinji… falling in love with a useless, fucking doll. What a goddamn shame."
Without waiting for a response, she turned on her heel and left the room, banging every locker she passed closed in her anger.
Rei stared after her, one hand on her stinging cheek. She is right… she thought dismally. Her eyes went to the plugsuit hanging in her locker.
"What use is EVA if I cannot use it to protect the one I love?" she whispered to the empty room.
Of course… she got no reply.
Asuka stalked through the halls of NERV in a rage, ignoring a handful of hesitantly called greetings and congratulations as she made her way towards the infirmary. Of all the times to choose to be a doll, she thought, shaking her head angrily. Hopefully I slapped some sense into her, but who knows? Girl's about as dense as-
She came up short as she spied Misato coming around the corner. One arm, Asuka noticed, was in a sling, and a most unflattering bandage was wrapped tightly around her head, but the woman was undeniably alive.
Asuka frowned, though, glancing around for a hallway to duck into before she was spotted. The last thing she wanted just then was to have a debriefing with the annoying, overly-boisterous woman – not after the way she had torn Unit 03 into pieces.
"Asuka," Misato said, dashing any hopes of getting past without a discussion, "I need to talk to you about something."
"Talk fast, Misato," Asuka muttered, lengthening her stride and forcing Misato to scramble to keep up, "I need to go check on Shinji and Touji."
The older woman took a deep breath. "I just listened to the tapes of the battle, Asuka," she said carefully. "Why are you acting this way? You know that Shinji and Rei are together, but you're acting like a jilted girlfriend."
Asuka smirked. "Boy," she said absently, "for a 'master tactician' you sure suck at reading people."
"I'm serious," Misato countered, "I want to know what you're thinking. You knew Touji was the Fourth… but you didn't twitch a muscle until Shinji was the one in danger. Now why are you so hung up on-"
"Shut up," Asuka cut in, her tone so icy that Misato actually did what she was told. "Just shut up and keep your nose out of it, God you're annoying!"
Misato looked at the girl, taken aback by her rage. She's dangerous this way… she realized, she has to understand that our survival is more important than her loyalty to him…
She licked her lips. "Asuka," she said carefully, "Shinji is a fantastic young man… but even you must know that the fate of the entire species-"
"This is why you can't be trusted," Asuka said flatly. "You have yourself a nice day, Major… and don't worry about Shinji any more. He's in good hands."
With that, she turned and strode past the older woman, rounding the corner and disappearing before Misato could recover enough to reply.
( 0 0 0 )
Shinji opened his eyes carefully, glad that he was still able to open his eyes, and looked down at his body. Aside from the various life-monitoring sensors attached to him, he seemed intact – and a quick flex of the hand told him that his right arm was indeed still attached to his body.
Man, he thought dismally, now I know what roadkill feels like…
Every joint in his body seemed to be protesting as he pushed himself up to a sitting position. He put a hand on his head, taking a deep breath to try to clear some of the cobwebs from his mind, and when he finally felt like he could handle the world, he looked around.
"Boo!"
Yelping with surprise, Shinji nearly fell out of bed, his eyes going wide as someone leapt up from the side of the bed.
"Haha- ow, ow! Damn it, Souryu – stop making me laugh!" a voice protested from the other side of the room.
"T-Touji…?"
Looking past the still-giggling Asuka, Shinji found that the other bed in the hospital room was indeed occupied by his best friend. Before he could get too choked up, Asuka rose up from where she was crouching by the bed and whispered, "He's fine… don't sweat it…"
Shinji frowned at the tone in the redhead's voice. He had only heard that tone from the girl when she talked to, or about, Kaji. With a start, he realized that she was being affectionate, and for one brief instant, jealousy flared in him.
She's never used that voice when she was talking about me, he thought, absently noting that the door to the room was slightly ajar, what, am I not worth it, or-
"Hey," Asuka said with a wink, "why are you staring at me, Third Child?"
"Woot!" Touji called, "You go, Shin-man! Why settle for one girl, huh?"
"I… I wasn't staring," Shinji stammered, blushing as the other two Children laughed… and doing his very best not to think about the Child that was not present.
The reminder that Touji was a Child hit Shinji rather hard, and he sat up higher in bed, trying to get a better look at his friend.
Asuka moved aside, casually sitting on the edge of Shinji's bed. "Did I say fine?" she mused, shaking her head ruefully, "I meant not dead."
Shinji nodded dumbly as he looked at Touji. Though he seemed to have all of his limbs, Shinji could easily see that the jock was in pain – quite a lot of it. His chest was wrapped with heavy bandages, and his right eye was swollen shut with a huge, dark purple bruise. Overall, Shinji thought guiltily, Touji looked like a boxer on the loosing end of a severe beat down.
"Hey," Touji said easily, "it's not as bad as it looks." He snorted, shaking his head ruefully as Asuka rolled her eyes. "Ok, it is as bad as it looks, but I'm alive, right?"
Grinning, Asuka leaned back on Shinji's bed, lying carelessly across his legs. "He woke up before you did," she pointed out, resting her hands on her stomach and staring up at the ceiling. "Another few hours, and I might have started worrying about you, idiot. What's the big idea, anyway? I beat the angel, and you go passing out from a little pain? What is up with that?"
Shinji remembered the 'little pain' with a shudder and replied the best way he knew: evasively.
"So, how is Misato?"
Asuka's smile faded as she sat back up. "Fine," she murmured, shooting Touji a significant glance. "Little banged up – but she's got a hard head, so she should be fine in a few weeks."
Few weeks sounds about right, Shinji thought with a faint smile, debating whether to ask her about Rei or not. "So," he said hesitantly, deciding ultimately that it would be a bad idea, "are you ok?"
Asuka smiled, rising to her feet and dropping into the chair between the two beds. "Yeah," she said, clearly happy that he was asking after her health, "just a few bruises. Angels got nothing on me, Third – thought you knew that."
Shinji chuckled, but he noticed that Asuka's attention was no longer on him. Following her line of sight, he stared out into the hallway. "Is… someone out there?"
Keeping her eyes focused on the hall, Asuka shook her head. "No," she whispered quietly, a faint smile lifting the corners of her mouth. "No one at all…"
( 0 0 0 )
Rei locked the door to the Commander's apartment, pocketing the key absently as she started down the stairs and onto the street. Things were tense, but acceptable, when the Commander was in the apartment. He seemed to want to talk to her about something – or perhaps, reiterate something he had already said… but he never spoke, choosing to simply spend his time in silence when she was around, and only responding if she asked him a direct question, which was not often.
She knew better than to upset him.
Silence was comfortable with Shinji, she thought suddenly, stopping at the bottom of the stairs and shaking her head to clear away this memory, No… do not think about it. That is over…
Over, she mused as she started up the street towards the train station – over was such a final sounding word. The show is over, the game is over, the fight is over, the day is over… your life is over. It made her want to sigh. Her relationship with Shinji was over. There was nothing to be done about it – not when he felt the way he did… not when she could not even face him when he was wounded and in need of comfort.
Souryu seemed to be doing fine, she thought with an uncharacteristic trace of bitterness. I could not even face him… I am weak. The only way we could reunite would be if he approached me and said-
"Rei, can I talk to you?"
Rei lifted her head, wondering for a moment if she had spoken these words herself. She carefully made her expression blank, however, as she found herself face to face with, "Ikari."
The Third Child flinched at the formal greeting, but took a step closer, raising his hand in a tentative wave. He is… injured, Rei thought, her eyes lingering on the thin strips of metal on Shinji's hand, I hope it is not too painful…
This was the hardest aspect of their breakup, she decided instantly – the fact that she still cared. She truly wanted to go to him, and inspect his injury, and kiss him, and somehow make everything alright… but she steeled herself, preparing to walk past him as she remembered his harsh words and the fear in his eye.
"Excuse m-"
"Please wait," Shinji said, quickly reaching out to put his hand – the injured one – on her shoulder. "I, umm… just for a minute…?"
"I need to go to the store," Rei said coolly, carefully pulling away from his touch, "excuse me."
"Please…?"
With a small sigh, the First nodded. "Very well," she said quietly, "but I do not feel it will change anything."
Shinji nodded, gathering his wits and doing his best to remember everything Ritsuko had told him.
"I know…" he said awkwardly, "I know I've let you down… I've been a fool to myself – I thought… that I could live for no one else…"
Rei simply stared at him, waiting for him to complete his painful, soul-bearing speech.
"But now," Shinji murmured, swallowing hard and making himself meet her gaze, "through all the hurt and pain… it's… God, I had this all laid out – everything I would say to make you take me back…" he shook his head, "but it all sounds so stupid now. What I'm trying to say… what I need to say is – I want you back, Rei. How can I get you to love me again…?"
Silence fell as the girl considered the question, finally shaking her head minutely and whispering, "I cannot accept your companionship when I know that you find me… distasteful."
As she turned to leave, Shinji reached out and grabbed her arm. "I don't," he said desperately, holding her tightly as she tried gamely to pull free. "I… being without you is killing me," he confessed miserably. "Every day, I wake up feeling like there's something missing – something so important that I shouldn't even be able to get out of bed without it." He wet his lips, nervously concluding, "I don't care how cliché it sounds, but the something missing is you."
Rei glanced coolly down at his hand, saying nothing until Shinji finally released her. "Why did you invite me over that day?" she asked quietly.
"When we watched the movie?" Shinji asked uncertainly.
"Yes," Rei replied, "you had never shown any interest in me before. Why that day?"
Shinji's shoulders slumped. "I don't know," he admitted, sounding defeated, "all I knew was that every time I looked at you, I saw a person I wanted to be closer to – and that day, I couldn't keep it to thinking." He shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't have a better answer than that."
Rei waited until he met her gaze before asking, "What do you see now…?"
The boy blinked as tears choked his words, making him nearly incomprehensible as he replied, "I see the most important person in my life leaving me behind because I was too blind to understand that where she came from doesn't mean anything compared to who she is."
"I see."
His impassioned words seeming to have no effect, Shinji clenched his hands into fists. "Damn it!"
Rei's eyes widened in surprise as Shinji reached out, wrapping his hands around her upper arms and yanking her into a fierce, passionate kiss. She struggled for a moment, but it was weak and perfunctory – barely more than a murmur of protest as he tried to force her to understand how much he needed her.
"D-damn it," he hiccupped, scrubbing angrily at his eyes as he pulled away, "why can't I make you s-see? I j-just want to be with you…" Slowly, it dawned on him just what he had done. "Sorry," he gasped, covering his mouth with one hand and clenching his eyes closed, "God, Rei – I'm sorry…"
Tentatively, Rei reached up, touching her lips and bringing her fingers away tinged in red.
"I'm sorry…"
Rei said nothing, slowly rubbing her fingers together and staring at the tiny spot of crimson staining them.
"I'll, umm… I'll go now," Shinji said quietly. "I hope-"
"It truly means that much to you?" Rei cut in quietly, finally letting her hands fall to her sides. "I cannot change what I am, Shinji… will you be alright knowing where I come from?"
Shinji let out a long, shuddering breath. "I'm not sure," he replied honestly, quickly hurrying on as Rei brought her gaze back to him. "But I want to try." He licked his lips as Rei stared at him, her eyes betraying no emotion that he could read. "All I can do is try," he whispered, refusing to look away from her as he reached up and put his hand on her cheek, "because I'm not strong enough to say 'no, it doesn't bother me at all.'" After a long moment of silence, he tentatively asked, "So… are we… can we stay together?"
Rei closed her eyes, leaning her cheek against his warm palm. "Yes," she said finally, "we can… so long as you are willing to try, Shinji – because I cannot be the only one to change…"
The boy stared at her softly gentle features for a moment, then quietly whispered, "You really have changed."
Slowly, Rei opened her eyes, making him shiver as she quietly replied, "Because of you." Without breaking eye contact, she covered his hand with her own, holding it against her face and drawing a long, deep breath. Letting it go, she said, "I have… missed your touch, Shinji."
"Yeah, I missed touching you too."
Rei blinked, opening her mouth to comment that she had missed that aspect of their relationship as well, but before she could speak, Shinji barked a short, nervous laugh.
"I d-didn't mean it like that," he said awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck with his free hand. "God, I sound like a pervert… I just meant-"
Laying a cool finger against his lips, Rei silenced him. "I understand," she said quietly. "I have never been very good at expressing myself either… you do not need to be embarrassed."
They stood in silence for several moments, simply enjoying the feeling of closeness they were sharing. Finally, Shinji stepped closer to the First, wrapping his arms around her and holding her slender body up against his, nearly shouting out loud as she came to him willingly, burying her face in his shoulder and filling her lungs with his scent.
I WON'T screw it up this time, he thought brutally. I'll never make you cry again, Rei, I swear!
Wishing that this mental proclamation was entirely within his sphere of influence, Shinji loosened his grip, letting Rei step back. "Where are we going?" he asked as she took his hand in hers and began to walk.
"I am not quite sure," Rei admitted, shaking her head minutely. She stopped after several minutes of silence, turning to face the uncertain young man and carefully raising his injured hand to eye level. "Did this happen in the angel attack?"
"No," Shinji whispered, shaking his head for emphasis. "It was before that."
"How did it happen?"
Shinji lowered his eyes. "I was… angry that I'd hurt you," he said softly, "I hit the wall with my fist."
Slowly, Rei raised his hand to her lips, kissing him between the metal plates of the microcast. "If it would not be too much trouble," she said quietly, "please do not hurt the one I love anymore."
Unsure if this was meant as a joke or not, Shinji simply replied, "I'll umm… try not to."
Seemingly satisfied with this response, Rei quietly moved around to Shinji's other side, taking his uninjured hand in hers before continuing to walk down the street.
"Hey, umm…"
"Hmm?"
Gathering himself, Shinji whispered, "There's a bunch of apartments free in our building. Since your place was… well, you know – maybe you could… get one of those."
Rei considered this. "It would be nice to be that close to you," she said slowly, "but I do not believe that the Commander would approve."
"Oh…"
"…I may request it, however."
Shinji brightened considerably. "Really?" he asked hopefully.
"Perhaps."
This, Shinji decided would have to do – he was far too busy thrilling to the feel of Rei's hand in his to worry about whether or not she was going to live close by. He did have some priorities, after all. As they walked down the streets of Tokyo-3, he felt as though he should say 'I love you,' or something similar to show how glad he was to have her back… but nothing came out.
Ultimately, he simply raised her hand to his lips, kissing it as she had kissed his and renewing his unspoken promise to make her happy no matter the cost.
I was not, he would find, an easy commitment to keep.
Continued…
Author's Notes: as far as I know, there's nothing like the microcast in the real world, but I could be wrong. It just sounded like a cool idea – and really, would you want YOUR giant mecha pilot wandering around with a big clunky cast on his hand, potentially affecting his ability to operate his machine? No, I don't think so!
Pre-read on this chapter was by Ryoma, Akodo-Tim, and LeperMessiah – who all agreed that it is far better to have loved and lost… than to be hit in the head with a steel pipe. And lastly, if you really want someone to blame for this chapter taking so long, blame Fuhrer Lep. Stupid chapter went to four drafts before that slave driver was happy with it.
Feedback is always welcome on any site with reviewing capabilities or by e-mailing me directly at random1377(at-sign)yahoo(dot)com.