Chapter Ten
Chase two girls, lose the one
It's been over a week since Rose's charity benefit and I haven't spoken to Edward since. It's not that I'm avoiding him but the whole incident with Tanya made me feel a few things I'm trying my best to ignore.
It's Friday night and I'm sitting on my bed reading a manuscript for work when my phone buzzes.
Hey. How are you? - E
I read the message, biting my lip and cursing the small group of butterflies that have started fluttering just at the sight of his name.
I can't ignore him...
Hey. I'm ok. You? - B
His reply is almost instant.
Yeah, I'm good. Just thought I'd check in. I haven't heard from you for a while. - E
I sigh slightly, leaning back on the pillows.
Yeah, sorry. Just tired I guess - B
Oh ok. As long as it's not something I did... - E
I sigh and stare at the ceiling for a moment.
No Edward, you didn't do anything wrong...
No, it's all good - B
It is...it should be anyway...
Cool. Actually, I wanted to ask you if you wanted to come over tomorrow evening. Jasper is taking Alice to dinner and a movie. - E
I stare at my phone.
Do I want to see him tomorrow?
Yes.
Should I see him tomorrow?
Probably not.
A few minutes go by before a second message comes through.
No pressure or anything. I thought we could watch a movie or something...maybe get some takeout? We don't have to do anything... - E
And then a third.
Your choice though. I'm up for whatever. - E
And then a fourth.
I'm gonna shut up now - E
I smile at my phone slightly.
He's such a dork at times...
I take a deep breath before typing out my reply.
Ok. But I get to choose the movie. I'm not watching any of your 80s action shit - B
Fuck off Bella, they're gold! - E
I laugh quietly at the message, feeling my cheeks warm.
No, but seriously, I'm happy to just chill out if that's what you want to do - E
I read the message a couple of times, feeling the ache in my chest ease a little at the message.
Ok. I'll see you tomorrow evening. 6pm? - B
Perfect - E
I put my phone down on my nightstand and stare up at the ceiling.
You're getting in too deep Bella Swan...
I sigh quietly.
Maybe I'll swim...
I turn out the light.
Maybe I'll drown...
On Saturday I spend the day staying busy. I clean the apartment, do laundry and even run down to the small grocery store on the corner to buy some beer for tonight. By the time five-thirty rolls around, I'm almost rushing to be ready on time.
Alice and Jasper left about twenty minutes ago and I'm just pulling on my boots before I walk out the door. I grab my bag, lock up before I leave and then head down to the lobby and out to the street to hail a cab.
I slide into the backseat of the car and give the driver Edward's address. In the dark of the cab, I try to calm the army of ants that have started their well-known march in my stomach.
Before I know it, we're pulling up outside of Edward's building. I pay the driver and head into the lobby, taking the elevator and walking down the hallway to Edward's door. I take a deep breath and then knock. Moments later the door opens revealing Edward.
"Hey!" He says happily, moving out the way so that I can come in. He's dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie. He looks comfy and cosy and completely delicious.
"Hey" I say quietly, walking into his kitchen and placing the beer down on the table. "I come bearing gifts!" I say, pointing at the six-pack.
"Great" Edward replies with a smile, "I always knew you were my favourite for a reason" He says, giving me a wink. I smile slightly, trying to ignore the way the nickname makes me feel.
"So..I haven't ordered any food yet because I didn't know what you wanted" Edward continues, moving to the counter "but, I did pick up a menu for that new Thai place down the street..if you fancy 'living on the edge'?"
Edward seems in a really good mood tonight and it's kind of infectious.
"Sure, why not?" I say with a shrug. "You gotta risk it for a biscuit right?" I reply before internally berating myself.
What the fuck are you talking about Bella!
Edward laughs. "Yeah I guess you have" He says, his eyes twinkling at me.
I walk over to the counter, standing next to him, so that I can see the menu. At this proximity, I'm almost overwhelmed by Edward's scent. I can smell his shampoo, his musky aftershave and the faint smell of cigarettes. I glance up at him, his eyes meeting my own.
"So...what are you going to go for?" I reply, tucking some hair behind my ear.
"Oh er..." Edward leans in a bit reading the options. "I might try the 'signature green curry with chicken'" He says. "You?"
"Um..I might go for the 'black pepper beef and mixed Asian greens'" I reply after a moment. Edward nods, smiling at me before walking over to his phone. He places the order before turning to look at me.
"Thirty minutes" He says, placing his phone back down on the side. I nod. We're silent for a few moments.
"Wanna pick a movie?" Edward asks, moving into the living and turning on the TV.
"Sure" I say, moving to sit on the couch beside him.
"What kind of mood are you in?" He asks, flicking through some of the options. "Comedy, thriller...romance...80s action?" He asks, his voice teasing.
I snort. "I don't mind...maybe a thriller?" I reply.
"Yeah?" He says, selecting the genre.
"Yeah, I fancy something I can get my teeth into," I say with a shrug. Eventually, we settle on a new movie that neither of us has seen.
"I'll get the beers" Edward says, standing and running into the kitchen to grab the six-pack I brought. When he returns he places them on the table, handing me a bottle, before taking one for himself. We both pop the cap before Edward hits play.
After about ten minutes I'm starting to get into the film. The plot seems to be following a detective as he hunts down a serial killer from his past. Suddenly Edward's buzzer sounds. I jump slightly in my seat.
"It's only the food B" Edward says, chuckling at me slightly.
A few moments later he's back with a bag of food and some cutlery in his hand. He places the bag on the coffee table and hands me mine. It smells amazing. We both tuck into our food, Edward resuming the movie.
"Mm this is really good" I say after a few bites.
"Yeah mine is too" He replies. "Wanna try some?" He asks, holding out a forkful. I hesitate for a moment.
"I don't have cooties Bells" He says. I roll my eyes and lean forward, wrapping my lips around the bite. I see Edward's eyes darken slightly at the action and my own cheeks heat up in response.
"Mmm" I moan slightly, Edward's eyes locked on my mouth "That is really nice. Wanna try mine?" I say, holding my own fork out in return.
Edward leans forward and takes the bite I offer. I feel a tingling in my stomach.
"It's good...really good" He says, his voice sounding deeper. After a moment, he turns back to look at the TV shaking his head slightly. I follow suit.
We finish our meals, placing the empty containers on the coffee table, and I am completely hooked on the movie. It's quite tense. The detective has entered an abandoned house where he thinks some abducted girls may be being held. Suddenly a bird flies up on the screen.
"Ahh" I squeal, jumping in my seat. Edward jumps himself and his wide eyes look over at me.
"Fuck Bells" He laughs lightly "you scared the shit out of me," he says, resting a hand on his stomach.
"Sorry" I reply, laughing a little myself. He continues to look at me, his eyes burning into mine.
"Come here.." He says quietly, gesturing for me to move nearer him. I hesitate for a moment.
Is this a good idea?
"What do I smell or something?" Edward says in mock horror. I laugh slightly, shaking my head and moving nearer. The little voice be damned. I slide nearer him on the couch, Edward's arm moving to the back of the seat. I'm leaning into his side and can feel his body heat radiating through my clothes. Edward smiles slightly, turning his attention back to the screen.
I focus on the movie playing on the TV, trying to ignore the tingling sensation in my stomach.
We continue to watch for about another twenty minutes. The movie is getting tenser and tenser and I'm on the edge of my seat as the main character makes his way through a series of dark corridors in an abandoned hospital. I hold my breath as he pushes a door open...
"Boo!" Edward cries next to me.
"AHH!" I scream, jumping in my seat and almost hitting Edward in the face.
Edward is doubled over laughing, his eyes filled with tears from his own hilarity.
"Fucking hell Edward!" I cry, smacking him in the arm. "What are you trying to do?! Kill me?!" I say, watching him shake with laughter, clutching at his stomach.
"Fuck Bells...you should have seen your face!" He manages to croak out between fits of giggles. "That was the funniest fucking thing!" He continues.
I continue to smack him in the arm while he attempts to grab my hands from the air. He finally grabs ahold of them, forcing me to stop my attack.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry..." He says, pulling my arms down and away from him. He finally stops laughing after a few final giggles escape his mouth, his eyes staring into mine.
I suddenly realise how close we are, Edward's face just inches from my own. His eyes flick down to my mouth before returning to my eyes.
Please...
"Bella..." he says quietly, his voice husky.
Suddenly I feel my mouth slam into his, unable to restrain myself any longer. I feel Edward groan against me, his hands releasing my wrists and moving to my hair, cupping my face. He deepens the kiss, pushing me back on the couch and moving over me. His tongue slides along my bottom lip, asking for entrance. I open my mouth slightly, his tongue moving against my own. I moan loudly.
God, I've missed this...
We continue to kiss for a few moments, the intensity between us increasing until Edward suddenly pulls back.
"Not here" he says, standing. He pulls me up from the couch before practically running to his room. He slams the door behind us and presses me into the hard surface, his mouth finding mine again. I moan into the kiss.
His hands cup my breasts through my shirt as he moves his mouth from my lips to my neck. He kisses a fiery trail down my throat until he reaches my chest. I throw my head back, breathing heavily. I feel his fingers move to the buttons of my shirt, undoing them quickly and pushing it from my shoulders, letting it fall to the floor.
I push on Edward's chest slightly, moving him off of me and walking him backward towards the bed. He falls back when his knees hit the mattress, taking me with him.
"Ouf!" I hear him say as I land on top of him a little heavily.
"Sorry!" I whisper. He just smiles at me and moves his mouth back to mine. His hands go to my back, undoing my bra and pulling it from my body. His warm hands return to my breasts, lightly tweaking my nipples causing me to break the kiss with a moan.
My own hands fly to the hem of Edward's hoodie, pushing it up.
"Take this off" I say, my breathing already coming out in pants. Edward sits up and pulls it over his head, throwing the item onto the floor. My hands are everywhere, running along his shoulders, down his chest, coming to rest on the waistband of his sweatpants. I can feel him hard, pressing against my inner thigh and I moan, rocking slightly against him.
I don't know what's come over me. I move to stand from the bed, yanking his sweatpants down his legs, barely giving Edward a chance to lift his hips to help. I come back up, grabbing his boxers and pulling them off too.
He lies before me, completely naked, his chest rising and falling with heavy breaths, his eyes almost black with want. I quickly undo the button of my jeans, wiggling out of them, almost falling over in my haste, before dropping my panties too.
I crawl back up the bed, placing a knee on either side of Edward's hips and hovering just above him. I lean over to the nightstand, grab a condom and pass it to him.
"I need you" I say, kissing him hard. I feel manic. It's like the last few weeks without him and all the feelings brought up by Tanya have made me insane with need. Edward groans into my mouth, before pulling away and putting the condom on.
He leans back on his elbows, giving me room to sink down onto him.
"Urgh" he groans loudly when I'm flush with his hips.
I start to move quickly, lifting myself up and down over him, rolling my hips. I'm panting hard, sucking in great lungfuls of air as I move. I lean back slightly, resting my hands on his thighs.
"Fuuuck Bella" He groans. I look down at him and see him staring at where we're joined, his eyes watching himself move in and out of me. I feel myself get wetter as I watch him. Suddenly he starts to thrust up into me and I gasp as he hits that magic spot inside of me.
"Oh fuck! Yeah..." I moan, my eyes closing and my head tilting back. I move one of my hands slightly, leaning back further, rolling Edward's balls in my palm.
I hear Edward let out a breathy grunt and suddenly I'm being flipped over onto my back.
"Fuck, I need you harder" He groans, picking up the pace and pumping into me. I moan, throwing my head back in pleasure as his mouth slams into mine. He kisses me like he'll die if he doesn't, before ripping his mouth away to pull in great lungfuls of air.
"Oh fuck...Edward!" I cry, my moans getting louder as he pushes me closer to the edge. He moves his head to the side and begins to kiss down my neck. I feel myself tightening around him.
"Fuck Bella...I lo-" I hear his breath catch in his throat. "I love how fucking tight you are" he grunts, speeding up his thrusts even more. I moan in reply.
"Come on baby...I need you to cum for me" He says, breathing hard in my ear, one of his hands snaking down and circling my clit. That's all it takes. I'm soaring, flying off the cliff. I feel Edward follow behind me, sucking hard on my neck as he does, marking me.
When I finally come back to my senses I can hear Edward breathing heavily above me. My hands have somehow moved into his hair and I'm holding his head into the crook of my neck. His arms are wrapped around my torso, keeping me pinned to him.
"Fuck Bells" He pants, raising his head slightly to look me in the eye. "What the fuck was that?" He says, a small smile on his face.
"I dunno" I say, shrugging slightly, a blush colouring my cheeks. His eyes flick between mine for a moment before he lifts himself off of me to clean up. He then stands, slipping his boxers back on. I stand as well, finding my clothes and getting redressed, stumbling a little from my jelly legs.
"Want a hot chocolate?" Edward suddenly asks.
I turn to look at him, my face surprised. He's rubbing the back of his neck and looking awkward.
Hot chocolate?!
"Er..yeah" I reply, "that would be great".
He smiles at me, a little relieved before disappearing into the kitchen. I hear the kettle turn on just as I'm pulling my sweater over my head. I walk out to find Edward's back to me, leaning on the counter, his head hung low.
"You ok?" I ask as I walk towards him. He turns to look at me as if I startled him.
"Yeah yeah" He says, grabbing some mugs out of the cupboard and walking to the pantry to grab the hot chocolate.
"So...what brought on the hot chocolate craving?" I ask, smiling at him a little as he returns to the counter.
"Oh er" he laughs lightly, shaking his head a little "I don't know..just seemed like a hot chocolate kind of evening" he says, spooning the powder into the mugs. I nod, pursing my lips a little.
I watch as he pours the water and then adds a dash of milk before passing me a mug.
"Thanks" I say, taking the cup from him. He looks at me for a moment, a funny look on his face.
"Wanna finish the movie?" He asks. I nod, shrugging my shoulders slightly. We return to the living room, Edward rewinding the movie until we both remember where we were. I sit back on the couch, tucking my legs up underneath me and sip my hot chocolate.
I glance at Edward as he watches the rest of the film, sipping his drink and occasionally running his hands through his hair. I smile slightly.
He looks so comfortable...
I shake my head pulling myself out of my thoughts and continue to watch the movie. Once we've finished our drinks and the movie, Edward guessing the end correctly, I make my way to the door. Edward walks me out, leaning against the door frame as I turn to say goodbye.
"Well thank you for dinner...and the hot chocolate" I say, smiling at him.
"My pleasure" he replies, he leans in and gives me a quick kiss on the cheek. "Text me when you get home so I know you got there safely" He says, as I turn to walk away. I nod, before heading down the hallway to the lift.
On the car ride home I can't help the small smile that creeps across my face. I pay the driver and head up to my apartment, texting Edward that I'm back safely. He replies with a winking emoji. I feel my heart stutter.
Oh Bella Swan, you're already drowning...
The following Wednesday I'm added to a group chat by Edward.
*Movie Night*
Hey guys, Jasper and I wanted to know if you were up for a movie night on Friday? - E
I smile at my phone as I walk into the kitchen. Alice is sat at the table already eating her breakfast.
"Hey, did you just get that message from Edward?" Alice asks me as I help myself to cereal.
"Yeah, wanna go?" I ask her, pouring some milk into a bowl.
"Yeah sounds like fun." She says, tapping away on her phone. "We should totally suggest a Christmas movie!" she says, her eyes meeting mine.
"Oh I bet they'd love that!" I say sarcastically, hearing my phone buzz a moment later and seeing a message from Alice.
Yeah Edward, sounds good to me and B. We should totally watch a Christmas movie! - A
We're in too - R
I roll my eyes at the message before snorting at Edward's reply.
Fuck off Allie. I'm not watching some magical Christmas movie where no one realises the fat guy in red is Santa - E
I did say you wouldn't be interested - B
Alice looks up from her phone and sticks her tongue out at me.
Edward! It's officially December stop being such a fucking Grinch! - A
I snort at Allie's reply.
I am not a Grinch...I am an adult man that doesn't want to watch two hours of elves running around and reindeers flying through the sky pulling a magical chariot! - E
Sleigh - B
I hear Alice chuckle behind me.
Shut up Bella - E
I personally enjoyed The Christmas Chronicles - Em
And Elf - J
See Edward! You're officially outvoted - A
I roll my eyes, leaving them to fight it out amongst themselves in the group chat as I head to work.
By lunchtime, I receive another text, this time just from Edward.
Hey - E
I smile at the message.
Hey - B
So...as you may have heard I was officially outvoted in the group chat so our movie night has become a fucking Christmas movie extravaganza. - E
I laugh slightly while typing my reply.
I did see, yeah. Are you coping with the news ok? - B
I'll live. - E
I laugh again, placing my phone down on the desk as I check my emails.
I'm going to go to the grocery store on Friday evening, before the movie night, to get drinks and snacks. Wanna come? - E
I read the message, feeling my skin prickle and trying to ignore my heart doing a happy dance.
Sure - B
Okay cool. I don't really know what you girls would want so...shall I meet you there? - E
Yeah, that works - B
Perfect. See you Friday. - E
It's Friday evening and I'm heading over to the grocery store down the road from Edward. I feel the butterflies starting in my stomach as the cab pulls to a halt just outside. I step out of the car, paying the driver and scan my eyes across the few people waiting outside. I see Edward wave at me.
"Hey" I say as I walk up to him. He's wearing jeans, a navy blue sweater and a puffer coat, his collar pulled up shielding him from the cold. His hands are deep in his pockets and the cigarette hanging from his lips burns cherry red.
"Hey" he replies, smiling and stubbing out his cigarette. "Let's go in, it's fucking freezing out here" he says, ushering me through the automatic doors.
"Have you been waiting long?" I ask, as Edward grabs a cart.
"Only long enough to have my balls drop off" he replies, smirking at me as I laugh.
We head into the store, walking down the drinks aisle first. Edward picks up a couple of six-packs of beer and I choose a couple of bottles of wine for us girls. I also grab a Christmas-flavoured Baileys which sounds good. Edward rolls his eyes at me as I place it in the cart.
We then head towards the snack aisle, grabbing some chips, dips and sweet stuff. When we decide we have enough to feed a small army, we head towards the checkout.
I help Edward unload the cart onto the checkout, feeling very domesticated when I hear a voice behind us.
"Edward!" I hear the sickly voice say. Edward turns looking over my shoulder.
"Tanya" he says, smiling a little at her. I turn to look back at her.
"Oh...hello er..." she trails off, looking at me, her eyes flicking up and down.
"Bella" I fill in for her. She nods, giving me that sickly smile.
"What a coincidence, us running into each other again," he says, her eyes looking back at Edward. "What are you two doing out together anyway?" she asks, her voice sounding shocked we would even exist in the same world let alone be grocery shopping together.
"Oh um...our group are having a movie night tonight so we stopped to get some drinks and snacks" Edward replies, gesturing to the items on the checkout.
"Oh how fun! What movie?" Tanya asks, moving closer to Edward.
"I'm not sure.." Edward trails off, flicking his eyes to me briefly. "A Christmas one I think..." He tells her.
"Oh. my. god. I love Christmas movies...I wish I was coming" she says, pouting slightly and looking up at Edward from under her lashes.
Please no.
"Well, you should come" Edward replies, smiling slightly. "I'm sure Rose would be pleased to see you" he continues.
No.
"Oh that would be lovely!" Tanya cries, her eyes flicking down his body. "Well, as long as you're pleased to see me Edward, that's all that matters."
No no no.
I feel my stomach drop but am momentarily pulled out of my thoughts by the cashier starting to scan our items. I bag up our purchases, Tanya giggling with Edward the entire time before Edward pays and we head out the door.
Edward hails a cab and we all climb in the back, Tanya making sure she sits between Edward and I. I try to swallow the lump in my throat and ignore them, staring out the window at the passing city.
When we arrive at Edward and Jasper's apartment, I climb out of the cab quickly, sucking in some deep breaths. I turn to see Tanya's arm linked through Edward as she tilts her head towards him, whispering in his ear.
We get into the lift and head up to Edward's floor, walking down the hallway and waiting for Edward to unlock the door. I glance at Tanya and she gives me a condescending smile. Edward gets the door open and walks into the apartment, everyone else is already here.
"Hey guys" Edward calls, placing our items down on the kitchen table and removing his coat.
"Hey Ed! Hey Bells" they call back as we round the corner.
"Tanya?!" I hear Rose say from the other side of the room as we enter the living room. Everyone goes silent.
"Hey everyone" Tanya says in her sickly sweet voice.
"What are you doing here?" Rose continues.
"Edward invited me to your little movie night" Tanya replies, batting her eyelashes at Edward. I drag my eyes away and swallow the lump in my throat.
Everyone looks at Edward.
"Yeah well, we bumped into Tanya in the grocery store and she mentioned how much she loved Christmas movies so I invited her" He replies, shrugging slightly and going to sit down on the couch. Tanya squeezes in beside him, sitting far closer than she needs to. I take a seat on the floor near Rose.
There's a beat of silence before Emmett quickly stands.
"I'm gonna get the snacks!" he calls, running into the kitchen and returning a few minutes later with our purchases. "Bells, what you drinking?" he asks, giving me a small smile.
"Wine please" I reply quietly, forcing my eyes away from Edward and Tanya who look very cosy on the couch. Edward's eyes flash to mine for a moment but I look away quickly.
I take the glass Emmett hands to me, smiling gratefully and take a big gulp, letting the alcohol warm my insides.
"Ooo Christmas Baileys!" Alice cries, pulling the bottle from the bag. "Bells! You are a girl after my own heart" she says, smiling kindly at me. I smile back, slightly.
"Shall we start the movie?" Jasper asks, grabbing the remote and hitting play when everyone agrees. I see the opening credits of Christmas Vacation appear on the screen.
I lean back, keeping my eyes locked firmly on the screen and try to get into the movie. After a few moments I feel Rose's arm link through my own and give my hand a squeeze. I glance over at her and she gives me a soft smile.
We watch the movie for a while, everyone else laughing at the funny bits, but I can't seem to take my mind off of Edward and Tanya. Edward seems to have his attention focused squarely on the movie but every now and again, Tanya will lean in and whisper something, making him laugh or smile. Every one is a punch to my gut.
About halfway through, Edward says he's going to the bathroom and asks if anyone would like another drink. Emmett and Jasper say they'll have another beer and Alice asks for a Baileys.
"Bells" he says, I look at him. "Do you want a Baileys?" He asks, his eyes boring into mine.
"Yeah sure" It takes everything in me to keep my voice level. He nods before heading out of the living room and down the hall to the bathroom.
A moment later I see Tanya get up and walk into the kitchen. A couple of minutes go by and then a few more and Edward doesn't return with our drinks.
"Urgh what's he doing? Making the fucking thing!" I hear Alice grumble from the other side of the room.
"I'll go get them Allie" I say, standing and walking towards the kitchen, pleased to have something to take my mind off of things. I round the corner and my breath catches in my throat. Edward is leaning against the kitchen counter, his mouth on Tanya's, his hands on her hips. I let out a small gasp and I see Edward's eyes pop open and meet my wide ones.
"Bella-" He starts but I'm already gone. I quickly walk back into the living room, taking my seat next to Rose. I stare forward, dazed, unseeing.
"Did you get it Bells?" I hear Alice ask. I look at her blankly.
"No. Couldn't find it" I reply, my throat tight.
Breathe. In and out. In and out.
Seconds later Edward returns to the living room carrying the drinks, Tanya sauntering in behind him. He hands Emmett and Jasper a beer each and Alice a Baileys, her berating him for taking his time. He reaches his arm out to me, passing me the glass but I just ignore him.
"Bella" he whispers. I keep my eyes fixed on the TV screen. I hear him sigh and place the glass on the coffee table.
I stay like that for the rest of the movie. Breathing slowly in and out. Not moving a muscle, fearing that if I do I'll shatter into a million pieces. I don't loook at Edward. I don't look at Tanya. I just stare straight ahead, unseeing. I feel my stomach start to churn.
I need to leave. Now.
Soon, the final credits roll and I stand up and look at Jasper. I can't bring myself to look at Edward. Not now.
"Thanks for the movie Jasper but it's getting late and I think I should be getting home."
"You ready to go already Bells?" Alice asks, looking at me a bit concerned. Jasper looks confused and Emmett and Rose are exchanging glances.
Don't look at Edward. Don't look at Tanya.
"Yeah...I'm not feeling very well. Sorry. You stay though Alice and hang out with Jasper." I say, turning to walk out of the room. Rose stands too.
"Well, I think we should be heading home too Emmett" Rose says, making me turn to look at her. She's giving Emmett the 'we're leaving' eye. He nods, standing and following her into the kitchen.
I grab my bag from the table and walk towards the door. Alice meets me in there.
"Are you sure you're alright Bells?" she asks, touching my arm slightly.
"Yeah, just feel a bit weird. Probably the Baileys." I reply. "Don't rush, I'll be fine getting home. Have fun with Jasper" I say, giving her quick hug goodbye. As I open the door to leave I can't help but look back at the last moment. The last thing I see is Edward's green eyes staring into mine. I leave the building, vaguely hearing Rose calling after me but I hail a cab and drive off before she can catch up.
I barely remember the car ride home, or taking the lift to my floor. I unlock the apartment door, dropping my bag. I walk to my bedroom, and close the door behind me.
I'm completely still, still holding the doorknob in my hand. Then I feel a drop of water hit my hand. I look down at it and realise it's a tear. I lift a finger and wipe beneath my eyes realising that I'm crying.
I turn around, leaning against the door and let out a horse cry crumbling to the floor. I clutch my chest, the pain inside it excruciating, burning me from the inside out. Tears stream down my face and I gasp for air, trying to breathe through the pain.
All I can see is red hair and green eyes and locked lips and hands on hips. I rock slightly as I cry into my knees, feeling as if my throat has been slit, the ache almost unbearable. I put my hand to my chest, sure I'll feel a gaping hole where my heart should be. I don't know how long I sit there, crying into the silence but eventually, I move to the bed, curling up into a small ball, not even bothering to get undressed. I lie there, staring into space, silent tears rolling down my face when my phone buzzes.
*Edward is calling*
I ignore it. He calls again and again and again. I ignore them all.
Then the texts start.
Bella, please pick up - E
I didn't mean to upset you. - E
Will you at least talk to me? - E
Finally, the last one comes in just before midnight.
I'm sorry - E
I close the chat, not replying to any of them. I close my eyes and think back to Ellen Griswold in the movie.
I don't know what to say, but it's Christmas and we're all in misery...