Man, this was a doozy.

Title: Estranged - Guns 'n' Roses

18 - And The Waves, They Get So High

'Are you sure you don't need a ride?'

'I'm sure. I'll be fine, I promise.'

'What about money? You've got change for the bus?'

'Believe it or not, I have thought this through.'

Trixie fidgeted uncomfortably, giving Zero an irritated scowl up through her eyelashes. 'I don't like that you're not coming with us.'

Zero let out a long-suffering sigh, shooting a look over at Newton and Vin that clearly said "help me!". She fidgeted with the strap of her scrappy rucksack, not deigning to reply as Trixie continued to fret.

'I mean, what if you get hurt -'

'Trix, are you forgetting the part where I lived behind a garbage dumpster for two months when I was ten? I'll be fine.'

Trixie's scowl went megawatt.

'No?' Zero continued. 'Never mind. How about the bit where I hid out in a crack house last summer?'

She was immediately met with a resounding chorus of horrified "WHAT?"s, and flinched a tiny bit in response.

'Guess I forgot to mention that one.'

'A crack house?' Trixie echoed, voice shrill.

Zero shrugged a little, far too nonchalant in Newton's opinion. 'They were actually pretty cool people when they weren't off their heads. One guy gave me some of his old metal cds.'

'A CRACK HOUSE?!'

Several of the people milling around the snowy bus stop glanced over curiously at Trixie's tone, and she flushed a little bit, lowering her voice.

'Zero Toriello, that does not make me feel better about this. I'll drag you home by the ear if I have to!'

Newton knew that the conversation was only going to spiral from this point. 'Trix, let her go. The crack house has been and gone - hopefully. She's got shit to do.'

'Besides,' Zero added, stuffing her hands in her jacket pockets, 'You've never been this worried before. You know I can take care of myself.'

'I know,' Trixie replied, sounding frustrated, 'but before you weren't -' She gestured toward Zero, waving her hand up and down. '- y'know.'

'You just gestured to all of me,' she replied dryly.

'Oh, you know what I mean.'

'Fine,' Zero replied, sounding very put upon. 'I'll text you every once in a while, so you know I'm still alive. Happy?'

'Not really.'

'It's the best you're gonna get,' Vin said, clapping Trixie on the shoulder. 'You're lucky you got that much.'

Zero scowled at him. He just flashed one of those disarming grins of his, seemingly unconcerned.

'Fine. Whatever.' She hesitated then, as if suddenly unsure of herself. 'I'll, uh. I'll see you guys in a couple of days.'

Newton felt his chest clench then, though he wasn't quite sure why. He stepped forward, bundling Zero's much smaller frame up in his arms, squeezing as tightly as he could. 'Look after yourself,' he mumbled. 'Don't do stupid shit.'

'Don't be a dick,' she huffed, wriggling out of his grip, before snaking an elbow over his shoulders and hooking him downward. He staggered as he was bent over nearly double. 'And don't manhandle me.'

'Don't manhandle me!' he yelped, as she tightened her arm around his neck and viciously ruffled his hair with her fist. Even so, he couldn't help laughing. 'Okay! Jesus! I surrender!'

After a moment, he was able to extract herself from her unnervingly strong grip. Then before she could shout at him (and mostly just to piss her off), he leaned down and dropped a kiss on her forehead.

She swiveled to scowl up at him. 'Do that again, motherfucker. I dare you.'

'Bitch.'

'Jackass.'

'Still love you, though.'

That, at least, shut her up. Her cheeks darkened in a flush, and she quickly turned away. He thought he might have heard a mumbled 'Love you, too,' but he wasn't quite sure.

He counted that as a win, anyway.

Trixie still seemed very on edge. Vin's expression seemed fairly neutral.

'Will you please tell us where you're going?' Trixie asked, arms crossed anxiously over her chest. 'I really don't like not knowing.'

'You don't say,' Zero deadpanned, gaze flickering from her, to Vin, and back again. She exhaled heavily, eyes drifting off to somewhere in the middle distance. 'I'm going to my dad's to pick up the last of my shit. Also the bit of cash I had stashed away, if he hasn't found it already. Might as well, since he's not home.'

Trixie's nervous fidgeting immediately came to a halt. 'Oh.'

'Jesus,' Vin muttered, a dark look crossing his face.

'I promise I won't set everything on fire,' she added, with a wry twist of the mouth. 'Even though he totally deserves it.'

Newton swallowed awkwardly. 'Uh, are you sure you'll be okay to do that?' When she turned to frown at him, he continued. 'I mean psychologically. PTSD is a fucked up thing.'

That immediately made her shoulders draw up defensively. 'I'll be fine,' she snapped. 'There's nothing wrong with me, fuck -'

'I never said that -'

'- and not that it's any of your business -'

'- that's not the point -'

Shit, there was never any getting through to her when she was riled up.

'Smettila!' he said sharply, stepping back into her space and catching her by the wrist. It was the one Italian word that he knew, and he only saved it for when he really needed her to listen.

The result was instantaneous, as though he had flipped a switch. Her mouth clamped shut with an audible click, and she scowled up at him. 'Non dirmi cosa fare.'

'I don't know what that means,' he told her evenly. 'I didn't mean to upset you. I was just worried because you're planning on doing something that might really mess with your head.'

'He does have a point,' Trixie added softly. 'Don't be offended about it; it's just a genuine question.'

It seemed to take Zero a moment to fully process this; when she did, her guard went down a little, and the fire left her eyes. She let out a tiny, quiet 'oh.'

Newton used his hold on her wrist to pull her back into a hug again. 'We love you,' he repeated. 'And we just want to know that you'll be okay.'

'I will be,' she said with an angry sniffle.

Oh shit, was that a tear?

She seemed to notice that at the same time, and scrubbed a frustrated hand across her eyes. 'Stupid hormones. I'll be fine, man.' She swallowed uncomfortably. 'It's just a quick trip. I'll be at Trixie's in two days. You won't even have time to miss me, or my charming personality.'

Vin snorted a laugh at that, and even Newton couldn't keep from cracking a small smile.

'Yeah, okay,' he said, letting her go. 'But you're not charming at all; you're a total asshole.'

That at least got a small laugh out of her, and when Trixie surged forward to hug her goodbye, she was smiling unashamedly.

'Don't be late, or I'm coming to find you with a sack,' she warned. 'I'll bring you back the hard way.'

'I feel very threatened,' Zero deadpanned, though the impact of her tone was lessened as she squeezed Trixie so tightly that it seemed like she might snap in two.

'And you should.'

Then Trixie stepped back, and everyone's gaze shifted to Vin. As always, he only ever had eyes for Zero.

There was so much tension crackling between the two of them, that Newton was in half a mind to shove their heads together and shout "fucking kiss and make up, goddamnit!", but he knew that would just get him decked. Still, a guy could dream.

Neither of them said anything for a long moment. Then Zero, ever eloquent, fumbled for something to say. 'Uh, I . . .'

Vin was more of a person who could get to the point. He stuffed his hands in his pockets, before stepping forward. He quickly ducked his head down and pressed a careful kiss to the corner of her mouth.

'Be safe,' he said quietly, and Newton was struck with the uncomfortable feeling that he was witnessing something far too private.

Zero stared at him, apparently completely dumbfounded. Newton couldn't really blame her; Vin generally had that kind of effect on people. After a moment she managed to regain some of her composure and cleared her throat awkwardly, a steady blush rising in her cheeks. 'I . . . er, right. Well, I'm gonna . . go. I'm gonna go now.'

'See you soon,' Newton said, aiming for bracing, though it fell a little flat.

'Let us know if you need us,' Trixie added. 'We'll be right there.'

Zero gave them a tired smile. 'I won't. But thanks.' Her eyes drifted back to Vin once more, and she readjusted her rucksack with an air of finality. 'See you guys later.' She seemed to be saying something with that look, though Newton wasn't really sure what.

He glanced back at Vin to see if he might give any more answers, but he was nearly impossible to read.

'You guys ready to go, too?' Trixie asked. 'My parents will be here soon.' She looked pointedly at Newton, like she was trying to distract from Zero's leaving and that he needed to get the hell on board.

'Er, right,' he echoed. 'Ready, Vin?'

'Yeah,' Vin replied quietly.

'Well, then -' He turned back to Zero, unsure of what he was actually going to say without starting another argument, but was brought short. Trixie frowned, also glancing around, before letting out a surprised exhale.

He knew, realistically, that if this had been dragged out, he would have begged her to stay like a stupid kid, and it would have made her angry. Still, he couldn't really shake the uneasy feeling that hung from his shoulders.

Whatever he had wanted to say didn't matter anyway, as she had already long since vanished into the crowd.

There weren't many people in Vin's life that he knew he could rely on. There were even fewer still that he loved. He was secure in his understanding of that.

Still, when a familiar limo with tinted windows pulled up to the curb, he couldn't help the tight feeling that clenched at his chest. That tightness turned into a giddy, fluttering sensation as the driver got out of the car and walked around to open the door. Valerie Moore stepped out, took one look at him, and opened her arms.

Vin fell into her embrace and immediately burst into tears.

'Oh sweetie,' she murmured, so much like Trixie, and yet so different all the same. One hand came up to cradle the back of his head. 'Oh baby.'

Vin could only sob, clutching at her like a lifeline.

While she was tall and slim, she was still considerably smaller than Vin's stocky frame. Yet, she held him like he was still twelve years old; warm arms and sweet perfume enveloping him like a comforting embrace.

He loved her so much for it.

Somewhere in the background, he could hear the rumbling baritone of Trixie's father, Jerome, but he barely noticed as he descended into a complete meltdown, right there at the bus station.

He was dimly aware of Trixie pressing a kiss to his cheek as she moved past him to get into the limo, and Newton grazing a hand against his elbow.

'M-missed you,' he choked out, words muffled into her shoulder.

'I missed you too, baby,' Valerie said, pressing a kiss into his hair. 'Now, what ever has got you so worked up, hmm?'

'Too many things,' he mumbled. He curled his fingers in the fabric of her coat, letting the feeling ground him a little. 'Just really . . . really need a mom right now.'

'Well, you've got me,' she said softly. 'You've always got me.'

That only made him cry even harder.

'Come on,' she told him, giving a gentle squeeze. 'Let's get into the car. Time to go home.'

Vin spent that evening in the living room of Trixie's enormous mansion. The fire crackled invitingly in the hearth, and he lay on the modern, angular lounge suite with his head in Valerie's lap, her long nails scratching soothingly at his scalp. Trixie had left not long before, kissing her mother's cheek as she went, determined to find Newton and beat his ass at yet another chess match.

'You ready to talk about it?' Valerie asked, taking a sip from her wine glass.

Vin exhaled heavily, scrunching his eyes shut. 'I . . .' He took a shuddering breath, and tried again. 'You'll be so disappointed in me.'

'I promise you, baby, that will never happen.' She brought her hand down to brush along his cheekbone. 'Does this have anything to do with why Zero didn't come?'

'No,' he said, a little defensively. 'It's not . . . That's different.' He paused. 'She's gone to raid her dad's place while he's in the big house.'

'Oh?'

'Yeah. She didn't really say much about it.'

Valerie hummed as she processed this information, and went back to combing through his hair. Vin's brain felt completely scrambled as he tried to find the words to explain the utter shitstorm that had happened over the last two and a half months.

He forced himself to look up, meeting Valerie's eyes. 'I . . .' He swallowed, fighting the urge to look away - to hide. 'I did something really stupid, mom.'

He didn't call her that particularly often. But in moments like these - moments where he felt so damn vulnerable, and just really needed a mother, he did. He couldn't help it.

'Tell me about it,' she said, 'and we'll do what we can to fix it, hmm?'

'It can't be fixed,' he whispered. 'It's not that kind of problem.' He paused, before deciding to just screw it and taking the plunge. 'I got a girl pregnant.'

He felt her hand pause, and immediately looked away. He didn't want to see what she might be thinking - didn't want to risk that disappointment, or shame.

The seconds ticked by. Nausea stirred in his gut. He was torn between being afraid to move, and desperately needing to run away.

Then finally, Valerie spoke.

'Well,' she said. 'I definitely wasn't expecting that.'

'Please tell me what you're thinking,' Vin blurted, scrambling to sit up. 'I don't - it's not - I -'

'Breathe,' she said firmly, curling her arm around his shoulders. Her angular, hazel eyes met his, so much like Trixie's that it was grounding in a familiar way. 'Now tell me, do you want me to listen, or do you want me to counsel?'

The question caught him off guard, and he stilled, momentarily thrown. He didn't think anyone had ever asked him that before.

'I . . . uh, listen, I suppose,' he said haltingly. 'And then maybe counsel. I don't know.'

'Okay, then we'll start with that,' she said, tone encouraging. 'So who's this girl?'

He swallowed uncomfortably, absently picking at his fingernails. 'Um. I think - I think you already know.'

She hummed, but didn't say anything.

'And - and I'm trying my best to help, but she won't let me.'

'She's a very hard-headed girl,' Valerie agreed.

And just like that, the words began to pour out. He told her how erratic Zero's behaviour had been; how she would lash out and he would take the worst of it. How she kept pushing him away, and how frustrated it made him. How she was determined to pretend that nothing had ever happened between them, even though she had seen him at his most vulnerable when no one else had. How much harder it was to cope with everything while being so painfully, unshakably in love with her.

Valerie was quiet as he spoke, once again stroking her fingers through his hair. When he finally ran out of words they both sat in silence for a while, save from the crackling of the fireplace.

'Could probably use that advice, now,' Vin mumbled, letting his head drop against her shoulder.

'Well,' she said, 'to me it sounds like you haven't done anything wrong. There are definitely other things going on that you might not be able to see.'

He frowned, considering this. 'Things like what?'

'I'd say that father of hers certainly has a lot to do with it. It seems she's very upset about being put in a position like this, especially after being the product of poor parenting herself.'

That much Vin had already figured for himself - hell, it was practically written across her forehead in neon lettering most of the time.

'That wasn't poor parenting, though,' he interjected. 'It was outright abuse.'

Her mouth thinned into a tight line. 'It was?'

'I mean, yeah,' he said. 'It's why she was such an aggressive kid.'

Valerie took another sip of wine, eyes dark. When the glass lowered, she glanced down at Vin and asked, 'Does Mr Soper know? He's her primary guardian now, yes?'

'Yeah, he does,' Vin answered. 'I think he's pressing even more charges. Making sure the bastard never gets out.'

'Good,' she said firmly. She thought for a moment, before continuing. 'I also think you need to be clear in establishing what you want. You've let her behave however she wants, because as far as she's concerned, you're going to leave. You need to prove that you aren't going to.'

'How do you mean?' he mumbled, glancing up at her.

'I think you should tell her how you feel, for a start. It doesn't sound like the two of you talk very much about your emotions.'

Vin flushed a little at that, eyes flickering back down into his lap. That was what Trixie had said, too. 'No, not really.'

'Well there's your starting point. Use your words.'

'You make it sound so simple,' he said softly. 'It's not that easy.'

'No, it's not,' she agreed. Her hand shifted down to his midriff, drawing him into a firm hug. She pressed her mouth to his temple and let it linger for a long moment. 'But that doesn't mean you shouldn't try.'

The shack was wedged between a crumbling, brick apartment complex, and another tottering, wooden two storey of similar disrepair. An alley ran between the shack and the apartment, darkened by its own narrowness, and the lines of laundry that ran high overhead.

The shabby front door was predictably locked. Letting out an irritated huff, Zero stomped down off the front porch and around to the side of the house, scowling up at her old bedroom window.

The last time she had left this house, her father had thrown her through that window and out into the alleyway.

Naked.

It seemed that he hadn't been bothered to replace the glass. The frame had been loosely boarded up, grey and weathered in its age. The sill was unchanged too, and when she ran her fingers along the underside, she easily found the notch where the spare key had been tucked.

She had hidden it here six years ago, after she had run away for the first time.

Key in hand, she trudged back to the front door, and after some persuasion, managed to get it to unlock. It opened straight into the dark, tiny living room, which still reeked of cheap beer even after two months.

She walked slowly across the scratched floorboards, somehow feeling the need to stay as quiet as possible, and not disturb the melancholy that this place had been left in.

Though she knew she was alone, she felt unnerved to return to the house that continued to haunt her dreams. It was practically unchanged - a shitty, post-war wreck of a building that hadn't seen any love in its miserable life.

The silence was broken by a small click.

'You have five seconds to get out of my house.'

Zero froze, heart lurching with alarm, and spun around to see who was there in the dark with her. The dim silhouette of a dark haired woman was standing in the kitchen doorway, Dad's rusty old revolver held in both hands.

That gun had been pointed at her too many times before.

Get on your knees.

'Who the fuck are you?' Zero spat, feeling her hackles rise. 'This is my house.'

'Care to explain why you're sneakin' around then?' the woman replied, flicking on the light. Zero blinked as her eyes were sharply assaulted by the brightness, stumbling back slightly in surprise. Then she scowled.

'Oh my god. He's actually gotten a whore that keeps house for him. Jesus Christ.'

The woman's hostile glare wavered slightly, and she lowered the gun. 'Fuck . . .' she said after a long moment. 'You're his kid, aren't you?' It sounded more like a stated realisation than a question, and an eyebrow travelled up her pale forehead as she looked Zero up and down. 'Jesus, get a look at you, huh? Takes a whore to know one.'

'Mind your own damn business,' Zero snapped. 'And I don't give a shit what Dad does with his personal life. I'm just here to take what I need and get the fuck out.'

'What makes you think you can just waltz back in after a couple'a years, then? You're after cash, aren't you?' She tilted her head, eyes narrowed. 'Can't make it in the big, bad world without your daddy?'

'Fuck off,' Zero growled, turning on her heel and stalking off to her old bedroom, heading straight for the loose floorboard from memory. She had to give the door a sharp kick to open it, as the hinges had seemingly rusted shut.

Though a thick layer of dust coated every surface, the room was exactly how she had left it - from the shattered beer bottles on the floor, to the blackened bloodstains on the windowsill. The wallpaper was mouldy and peeling from exposure to the weather outside, and that one plant she had managed to keep alive as a kid had long since died.

It was the bed, however, that really made her want to throw up.

There were vicious slashes in the mattress - a hazy memory surfaced of trying to stab her father in the eye with a knife, but being so panicked and exhausted that she could barely see straight. Apparently she had done a spectacular job of bottling that one up, as had barely thought about it since. It had pretty well been eclipsed by everything else that had happened that night.

She glanced over the moth eaten bedsheets, past the bloody handprint on the wall, and paused just at the edge of the bed. She took a hesitant step forward, before leaning down and picking up a worn, cloth kimono doll. It was small, easy to hold in her trembling hand, and so very threadbare. There was a dark patch on the hem of the doll's dress. Blood, probably.

She'd forgotten all about it.

Anger shot through her, so sudden and vicious that she jolted a little with it. Lips curling in a snarl, she hurled the doll across the room, and whirled away before she could see it fall. She stalked over to the loose floorboard, kneeled down, and pried it up with her fingertips.

She got an enormous splinter for her trouble, but she didn't care. She snatched up the small wad of cash sitting just beneath it, counting a couple of fifties, before pushing it back in place and getting to her feet.

The woman was standing in the doorway, apparently completely unsurprised by the state the bedroom had been left in. Her narrowed eyes flickered down to the cash clutched in Zero's hand.

'You ain't taking any money, kid,' she told her, moving forward as though she fully intended to grab her by the scruff of the neck and drag her out of the house.

Zero bared her teeth in the slightest hint of a snarl, meeting her eyes with a glare that was nothing short of murder.

'Watch. Me.'

'We've obviously got to watch Die Hard, it's Christmas Eve!'

'It's not technically a Christmas movie.'

'That's because it's better than a Christmas movie! Besides, there's that one guy McClane puts a Santa hat on after he's killed him - that's festive!'

'What the fuck, Newton.'

'I'm just saying! "Now I have a machine gun, ho-ho-ho." Fucking iconic!' After being met with Trixie's disdainful expression, Newton folded his arms and huffed petulantly. 'Whatever. Zero would totally agree with me.'

'I know she would,' Trixie replied dryly, apparently unimpressed by Newton's desire to wax poetic about a film from the eighties. 'But that doesn't make it any better.'

'I'm happy to watch Die Hard,' Vin put in with a shrug. 'It's fun.'

She sighed. 'Not you too.'

'I'm just saying,' he answered defensively.

'Besides,' Newton added. 'It might summon Zero from the depths of hell. She's late.'

'No she's not,' Trixie said, tone firm. 'It's only nine o'clock. There's still time yet.'

Vin wasn't quite so sure. His brain had been spinning since his conversation with Valerie, trying to decide what he was going to do. It was all much easier in theory than it would be in practice, and that was just infuriating. Now, as the three of them loitered around in the mansion's front parlour, mugs of eggnog clutched in their hands as they soaked up the roaring fire, it seemed impossible to find a solution that fit.

But then again, nothing really seemed to fit when it came to Zero.

'Has she texted you?' Newton asked Trixie, before raising his mug and taking a gulp. 'Anytime today, I mean?'

'Yes,' Trixie replied tiredly. 'She's got the whole subway system to traverse; that's going to take a while. She's fine.'

While Newton's nerves were outwardly obvious, Vin could tell that Trixie wasn't as nonchalant as she pretended to be. Every few minutes she would glance toward her phone where it lay on the armrest, before glancing away and feigning indifference.

The time passed like that for a whole, painful hour, before finally, there was a knock on the door. Newton nearly flung himself out of his seat to answer it. A heavy gust of wind swept in as he pulled open the door, and there, coated in a heavy dusting of snow, was Zero.

'You little shit,' Newton said, dragging her inside by the arm before she could even say a word. 'You had us worried!'

She snorted disdainfully, apparently happy to let him unravel her from her coat and direct her to the fireplace. 'How many times did I tell you I'd be fine?'

'Too many,' Vin said, getting up and walking to her side. 'But apparently you're a liar.' He lifted a hand to brush over a scratch on her cheek. 'What do you call this?'

'An accident,' she groused, batting his hand away and shaking the snow from her hair. 'It's fucking cold out there.'

Trixie appeared, right on time, with a heavy woolen blanket that she draped over her shoulders. 'Good to see you're still in one piece.'

'Okay, what is with the lack of faith lately?' Zero asked, pulling the blanket tightly around herself. 'Have you all just miraculously forgotten how much of a nasty piece of work I can be?' She looked as though she were about to continue on a tangent, but stopped suddenly and sniffed. 'Is that eggnog?'

'Yes, and you're not supposed to have it,' Trixie said, immediately setting her mug down. She shot Vin and Newton a pointed look, until they grudgingly did the same.

Zero seemed mildly annoyed by that tidbit of information. 'You're kidding, right?'

'Can't guarantee the eggs are okay,' she answered sympathetically. 'But hey, I've got something better.' She pointed at Newton. 'He was complaining about wanting to watch Die Hard. How does that sound?'

Zero perked up considerably at that. 'Hell yeah. That's a Christmas movie, it counts.'

'See!' Newton crowed triumphantly, elbowing Trixie in the side. 'I told you!'

'Yes, yes, you're so smart,' she replied absently. 'Come on, let's go to the living room.'

Newton almost bolted from the parlour in his eagerness, followed by a mildly exasperated Trixie. That left Vin and Zero still standing where they were, Zero keeping the blanket cocooned around herself until her lips slowly faded from blue back to pink.

'So, uh, how did it go?' Vin asked, glancing back at the cut on her cheek.

She shrugged indifferently. 'Not as smoothly as I'd have liked. Apparently Dad had a girlfriend who was holding down the fort for him.'

'She gave you that?'

'Yeah, but I knocked her out pretty quickly. Wasn't much of a fight.'

Vin couldn't help the little huff of laughter that escaped him at how nonchalant she sounded. Only Zero could come out of a fight and think it was boring.

He stepped forward, settling a hand on her hip and redirecting her to the doorway. 'Come on. Let's go watch this movie, before Newton combusts.'

She let out a small laugh, but leaned back into him all the same.

It was a good night.

Trixie's parents came by the lounge room to bid them goodnight, Valerie dropping a kiss on Zero's temple with a murmured 'good to see you again, baby'. Zero, as always, determinedly pretended that she wasn't flushing all the way to her hairline.

The four of them piled together on the sofa, bundled under several blankets and pillows. Vin couldn't help the delighted flutter his stomach gave when Zero willingly leaned against his shoulder, legs thrown across Newton's lap. It seemed like something had actually settled within her, and she was soaking up all the physical affection she possibly could.

It was nice.

By the time that the movie had finished, Trixie had fallen asleep, and Newton looked like he was well on his way there. Only Zero seemed to be fully awake, and she tipped her head back on Vin's shoulder to meet his eyes. 'Hey.'

'Hey,' he replied, feeling the corner of his mouth quirk up. He gestured to Newton, who had slumped into her chest. 'Comfy?'

'Surprisingly, yes. He's terribly bony, but it's not the worst thing in the world.'

That startled a laugh out of Vin, which he quickly tamped down so as not to jolt everyone. Trixie, who was leaning against his other side, stirred slightly but did not wake.

It was almost like they were their own bubble. Barred off from the outside world, and everything that had happened in it. Just the two of them, like nothing had ever gone wrong. Vin's heart clenched, and he desperately wished that everything could go back to being this easy.

Zero seemed to sense that something was going through his mind, and she looked at him questioningly. 'You okay?' she asked softly, giving him a little nudge with her elbow.

'Yeah,' he told her. 'I'm just . . . really happy.'

Her eyes softened a little at that. 'Yeah.' She let out a quiet sigh, before leaning back into his shoulder. 'Me too.'

If Vin could have had one wish, it would be that they could stay in this moment forever.

It didn't last.

Christmas Day fairly flew by in a blur of good food, warm drink, and happy affection. At the end of the night, when they all began to retire to bed, Zero pulled Vin aside, stood up on her toes, and dragged him down into the best goddamn hug of his life. It felt so good to be able to hold her properly, so warm and solid in his arms. He buried his nose in her neck and let himself just breathe, savouring this moment for how good it was.

'I'm so glad that I met you,' she whispered, voice slightly shaky. 'So damn glad.'

'Me too,' he murmured back. 'I wouldn't trade it for anything.'

Finally, after a long moment, she pulled away. 'Good night.'

'Good night,' he echoed, unable to tear his eyes away from her.

She was so beautiful that it hurt, sometimes.

She turned and walked down the hall, only pausing when she reached the bedroom she was staying in. She glanced back at Vin, gave a small smile, and closed the door behind her.

Vin slumped back against the wall, scrubbing a hand over his face.

Holy shit.

He knew it was slightly out of character for her, being so quiet and affectionate. And yet, he didn't question it, even though he really should have. Instead, he let himself revel in his own giddiness; the feeling that maybe things were finally starting to look up.

By the next morning, she was gone.

3/1/22