Chapter II: Canis lupus

Remus

Remus was feeling tired. He was used to teaching and working with kids, but the sheer amount of them was a bit overwhelming. The wolf had been especially restless this past month missing his pack, but Remus had a lot of experience ignoring that.

Outside his office, in the DADA classroom, Harry's year is waiting for their first lesson. Remus went over the notes the past teachers left, but only Lockhart had made any and most of them were novel ideas.

He decided to make his first lesson about Boggarts. He had a lot of practice with them recently and caught one in his room at Hogwarts when he moved in. The Slytherin and Gryffindor's class was very rowdy.

Remus opened the door and silence greeted him. It was disconcerting having that many pairs of eyes watching your every move. He made his way to his desk.
"Hello, my name is Remus Lupin and I am your new Defense teacher." As you heard the intro before, his marauder brain added. He proceeded to present the discipline and the purpose of the lesson today. His mind briefly wondered how his intro ranked against the others, but one had a maniac in his head and the other was a fraud…

He asked the students to form a line in front of the dresser.

"Longbottom, can you step out, please?" Remus said warmly. Neville raised big brown frightened eyes to him, but Remus knew he could do it. No matter how other people viewed the young Gryffindor, Remus knew he can do this and much more if he only gained a little confidence.

Remus demonstrated the spell and then stepped back to watch his pupil. He opened the wardrobe with a flick of his wand and Snape stepped out. Remus bit his lip; a teacher was a student's worse nightmare? A student that has been through so much? Maybe he should ask around more…

Neville closed his eyes and cast. Soon enough, Snape was wearing a huge hat with a stuffed bird on it and horrible neon green clothing. The class was laughing.
"Excellent work, Longbottom," Remus praised.

The boy beamed back at him. Neville had always been one of his favorites.
Next in line was Ron. Spiders were a pretty common fear. Remus snorted to himself, seeing a giant arachnid in tap shoes, was a sight for sure. He didn't know the name of the next student very well, but their fears remained tame

A young dark skinned Slytherin (Remus assumed it was Blaise from Draco's letters) stepped in. He looked confident. The Boggart took the appearance of a dark mist spreading towards him, but he cast before it reached him and it dissolved intro sprinkles all around him.

The other Slytherins were waiting in the back, letting the loud boisterous Gryffindors go first. Remus sighed, but he left them be. All of the Gryffindors had their test and from Slytherins only Zabini took his.

Even the line was dissolved and they were waiting in a circle.

"Draco, how about you give it a try?" Remus prompted.

Draco threw him an unimpressed glare, but stepped forward. Remus opened the door. A body collapsed on the floor, Narcissa from what Remus could see. Draco cast "Ridikulus" with shaky hands. The body changed to messy black hair and Slytherin robes, "Ridikulus" Sirius. Draco was shaking; when he cast next he was almost shouting. The body on the floor stood up and dusted himself, a perfect replica of Sirius.

"It's enough for today," Remus said tight.
The Slytherins all rushed for the door. Harry lingered, even after the Gryffindors were gone.
"What's up?" Remus asked reading his expression.
"I wanted to cast too."
"I know, pup," He ruffled his hair. "I was just afraid about what may have come from it."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, you do not exactly have normal fears now, do you?"
Harry shuffled his feet.
"It wouldn't have been Him," He said faintly.
"What would have been then?"
"A dementor."
"There is a spell to get rid of them. The one I used in the train."
"Can you teach me?" Harry said eager.
"I am afraid it's not on the curriculum for this year. It's quite advanced"
"Can we try, please?" Harry looked at him with pleading eyes.
"If you do not have a very busy schedule, we can try and meet in the evenings."
"I would like that! And Remus, you had an awesome class."
"Thank you! Now, go on, we do not want you to be late to your next class."
Harry smiled and skipped out.

After the first week, Remus found a routine. Routine was good, overworking himself till he collapsed into bed was even better. He had classes almost all days of the week, patrolling in the evening, since he took all the shifts he could, handled some detentions from the other teachers, had some private lessons with kids from upper years that wanted a Defense base career and had time for Harry's lessons as well.

He had experience teaching Harry even before Hogwarts, but the Patronus was a very difficult spell. Harry did his best, but he didn't manage to create even a mist at the first lesson. Remus was confident he could do it, but Harry was quite disappointed.

The Patronus Charm was not taught in school anymore. He remembered they did learn it, but war was already brewing when they were in school. They had had a lot more fighting spells in their curriculum then they did now too.

Remus got to meet more of Harry's friends as well. He especially liked Hermione Granger; she was a studious and quiet girl. He was not very fond of the Slytherins, which might have been just remaining bias that he tried to get over as a teacher.
The young Ravenclaw even invited him to her birthday – an invitation he had to decline, unfortunately. And not only because he was a teacher, but because it coincided with the full moon.

He arranged with Severus to handle his next class in the morning. Severus was a great, although reluctant help. He even brought Remus a potion that should keep more of his mind intact during the moon.

The potion tasted vile, but Remus hoped it would work. He walked himself to the Shack and waited out the moon. It had been a while since he felt so alone. Last time Lily was close by, and he knew he could trust her; she was pack.
He had to actually give Draco and Harry detention to make sure they would stay away. He hadn't transformed alone since before the end of the war, the wolf liked it even less than him.

As soon as the moon was out, the transformation started. Remus never got used to the pain. His whole body arched, his bones were stretching, his muscles taunted, like the werewolf was ripping him away from the inside.

Soon, the werewolf was alone in the room. It started howling, but there was no pack. The wolf sniffed every corner, but no smell of pack or prey, only walls, and the wolf hated the walls the most. It started shredding with his claws, tearing it apart, but it didn't smell of freedom.

Remus woke up on the shack's floor. The wolf managed to escape the main room, but thankfully not the house. He was standing in blood, but it was his own. That was good… He thought before blackness took him.
When he woke up he was in a hospital bed, a very familiar sight. Someone was at his bedside, his instincts told him, still raw and flaring after the moon. Female, distraught, pack. Remus opened his eyes. Lily.
"How are you feeling?"
"Like shit," He said raspy. His voice was scratchy; he must have howled himself raw.
Lily took a glass and spelled some water into it, then handed it to Remus. He drank the glass in one gulp.
"What is the status?"
"Multiple lacerations, one broken rib," She reported.
"Mendable," He said and laid back into the bed.
"You were not this bad last month."
"I had worse."
"Remus! I do not know what happened between you, but staying with him helped…"
"Well, so did Severus's potion, I have no blackout from last night."
"But you still tore yourself open."
"Baby steps."
"Will you tell me what happened?" Lily looked at him with pleading green eyes.
"You were right; this job was the best step for me."
"Remus!"
"Remus!" Harry rushed into the room.
"How did you got in?" Lily asked.
Harry looked for a second panicked at the sight of his mum.
"I will confiscate that cloak," Lily threatened.
"He is only using it for good," Remus protested.
Harry grinned wider and took a chair at his bedside.
"How are you?" He asked eyeing the bandages wary.
"I will be fine, Harry. Can go back to the desk tomorrow"
"No, you cannot; 3 days rest at least, doctor's orders!" Lily boomed.
"It will suck without you; Professor Snape sucks at DADA, don't know why he wants the job so much."
Lily glared at her son. Remus laughed. If he has his pack with him, he will be fine.
**

Remus still attended the Quiddich games, since as a professor he was expected to. He still wore Slytherin colors when they played, even if he was not required to. The first match of the season, Gryffindor against Hufflepuff, was not very entertaining in his opinion. Although Cedric Diggory played a very good game, from what he saw. Draco thought so too; he couldn't take his eyes off of him.
Remus never liked to play the sport, although most of his friends were obsessed with it. James Potter had reached Oliver Wood's level of obsession when he had been captain and even the significantly more chilled Sirius had been raving about it constantly.

Harry and Draco were both passionate about Quiddich. He knew they wanted the same position, but he didn't understand why they couldn't simply take turns; that was a no-no for some reason. Snape glared at him and huffed disapprovingly when he mentioned it.

This game was between Slytherin and Ravenclaw. He was standing in the teacher's area, since the kids he usually stayed with were both on the pitch. Lily was in the bleachers somewhere, maybe with Sirius, but Remus was trying not to think about it.

There was a commotion when the Slytherin team entered the field. Lee Jordan, the commenter, babbled over the names, but in the end announced Draco Black as the Slytherin Seeker. Remus looked on intrigued.

Draco played a good game, caught the Snitch before Cho Chang did and they ultimately won the game. Draco looked happy, but not beaming as he would have otherwise. Remus was wondering if it was about his dad or something else.
Remus didn't know Lucius Malfoy all that well; he had kept away from his posse in school and never met him in combat. He mostly knew him from Sirius and Narcissa's stories, but that didn't mean he didn't hate him.

He had kept a closer eye on Draco in the last month, but he seemed normal for the most part, broadened his Slytherin network and didn't get bullied all that much. But he was not happy, he was still angry, at Sirius, at his mum; at the world since it was that age. Remus tried talking to him, but he was shut down promptly.

Remus got the key to the mystery of the seeker position later that night, by having Harry knock on his door. He looked pretty rough and Remus got worried.
"I am not hurt," Harry said as soon as he was past the door.
"What happened, pup?" Remus asked.
"I… did something stupid"
"Care to elaborate"
"I… quit the Quiddich team this morning."
Remus remained quiet listening on.
"I wasn't enjoying it as much as I did in the last years… And then… Draco started shouting that I did it for him and that he doesn't want any pity and if he got the position, he wants to earn it," Harry looked at his feet.
"Did you quit the team for Draco?" Remus asked gently.
"Not… only."
"Harry, you can't make decisions for another person," Remus said it and only shuddered at the familiarity after it.
"But I know he really wants to be part of the team… And with all this… I thought he needed something good to happen."
"I understand, but… you robbed him of the joy of getting in because he is good enough."
"But he is! He proved that today!"
"So you are only sad because he is mad at you?"
Harry nodded confused.

Remus sighed. He considered the nurture argument again in relation with how people are developing their higher cognitive functions and how osmosis works… Maybe he could still blame this on Sirius, and he was kind of a special target this time.
"Did you apologize?"
Harry nodded.
"Did you mean it?"
Harry nodded vigorously.
"Ask Draco how to fix it and fallow his instructions, he most definitely already has a list. Just… be sure to listen to him next time."
Harry sighed.
"Thank you, Moony."
Remus gulped hard. "You're welcome."

Draco visited him too only a few days later. He was waiting outside his room after dinner. He tried to look nonchalant, but Remus could feel the tension radiating out of him. He invited the boy in.
"Father asked to see me in the first Hogsmeade weekend," Draco blurted as soon as they were inside.
Remus took a big calming breath and took a seat.
"Mum doesn't want me to meet him, neither does Sirius… I… want to meet my father."
"It is perfectly understandable that you would like to know your dad, Draco."
"Everyone says he is a bad guy."
"But he is still your father."
"I really want to see him, at least once!" the boy insisted.
"Then go!"
"I… do not want to be there alone"
Remus studies Draco closer.
"Why me?"
"Well… you are the least… opinionated person I know."
"Severus doesn't lean either way," Remus supplied.
"Severus is more protective than a mother bear," Draco rolled his eyes.
"I would not let any harm come to you," Remus narrowed his eyes.
"I know, but you will also let my father get a word in."
"Very well, I will accompany you."
"Great, I got Harry's cloak as part of his groveling, better use that."
Remus threw Draco a pointed look.
"He deserved it fully," The Slytherin shrugged.
"All good on that front then?" Remus asked.
"Still thinking about it. He did cross a line."
"Fair enough"

Remus hadn't seen Hogsmeade since his school years. It was never a popular spot except for students, he port keyed or apparated close by, but hadn't taken a stroll though it in ages. He tried not to reminiscent on that; it was hard enough living at Hogwarts again.

He was accompanying the students to town today, together with professor Sinistra. She was rather quiet and when she talked she only wanted to talk about astronomy, a subject Remus rejected for several reasons.
Draco was in a large group ahead of him, all Slytherins. Harry was looking abandoned in a corner with Hermione and Ron Weasley. So Draco hadn't forgiven him yet then.

It was pretty easy to avoid Sinistra once they got into town, Remus should investigate that more in the future. Draco was meeting Lucius at the Hog's Head so he made his way into there as well.

Draco steeled himself and walked towards a table in the back. Remus slipped by him and took a booth to the left. Lucius was already waiting for his son.
He rose when the teenager came in, didn't hug him and just shook his hand. Remus wasn't close enough to hear what they were saying, certainly some privacy spell was in place as well, but he could see them clearly.

Draco didn't say much from what Remus could see. Lucius is doing most of the talking, gesturing widely as he did so. Draco didn't rise and storm away enraged, so take that with a grain of salt. They were stiff and the conversation seemed pretty one-sided, but Remus didn't know what he expected from Purebloods, from people that barely knew each other.

When the meeting was over, Draco left first. Remus scuttled after him and removed the clock when they were outside startling the pureblood.
"Are you ok?" Remus asked worried.
"Yes," Draco said distracted.
"What did you talked about?"
"Family mostly… He told me about his family, the Malfoys."
"He is the only one left"
"He mentioned… Well, he does have me."
"You are a Black!"
"I have his blood in my veins too!"
"Did he… seem like a bad person?" Remus asked hesitant.
"He seemed very lonely."
"Did he ask anything of you?"
"Just to agree to see him again. He told me about the trial."
Remus bit his lip.
"He asked you to partake in it?"
"He told me to see him again, agree to a monthly meeting."
"Nothing more?"
"Nothing more."
"It is your choice… Just be careful"
"He is my father, he is harmless."
Remus looks back at the establishment they just exited. For Draco's sake, he sure as hell hoped so.

Remus was having a free afternoon; he didn't even know what to do to celebrate it better. He decided over reading a new muggle novel Lily had bought him, a romance one about a girl travelling into the desert, but he was not picky.
He was a few pages in when he got interrupted, because of course he did. He sighed and opened the door. Hagrid was waiting outside moving awkwardly from side to side, he looked panicked.
"What happened?" Remus asked.
"I'd this class… With Buckbeak… I 'old 'em to not get too close. I swear I did, Remus. But then… I was with my back turned…. And in the next, Draco was 'nder its legs. I jumped at 'em, but he was hurt… blood."
Remus widened his eyes in alarm.
"Where is he?"
"Hospital. Took 'im myself, I did."
"Okay, take a big breath, I will go and check on him myself. It was not your fault."
"I would never 'urt 'im!"
"I know," Remus patted him awkwardly on the arm.

Remus rushed to the infirmary. Severus beat him to it and was already kneeling by the bed.
"How is he?" Remus asked.
"Asleep at the moment" Severus whispered. "The arm is in a sling, but should be okay in a few days."
"Deep gash?"
Severus nodded.
"Was Narcissa notified?"
"She was and also…" Severus grimaces, "Lucius."
"Why?" Remus asked surprised.
"He is stated as an emergency contact."
"How bad?"
"He has some contacts in the Board of Governors…"
"Hagrid didn't do it on purpose."
"I assume not, but he is responsible for what happens in his class…"
"What can…?" Remus started, but was interrupted by Narcissa bursting in.
"Is he okay?"
Severus shushed her and informed her on the condition of her son.
"I am not happy to say it, but I can understand Lucius's reaction to this."
The teacher stared at her.
"I know Hagrid is a good person, but you must be honest, he is a lousy teacher"
"And how about the death of the creature?" Severus asked.
"Removing it from school will be enough. Send it to the Scamander sanctuary."
"Lucius is out for blood."
"I am sure; he will use it in the trial somehow," Narcissa sighed.
"And what will happen now?"
"I will ask the Sanctuary to claim the beast; I can't do anything for Hagrid…"
"Does he have the power to just fire someone?" Remus turned to Severus.
"If he has enough ears in the Board…"
Remus shivered. And he was having such a nice afternoon too.

Lucius had indeed enough friends in the Board. Buckbeak was sent to the Sanctuary, so they managed that, but Hagrid was fired and Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank was named teacher in his place. Dumbledore managed to keep Hagrid as the grounds keeper, but the half-giant was crushed either way.

Remus didn't like the pressure the Board was putting over the school, in his experience nothing good ever came from giving parents that much leeway. From what Narcissa wrote, Lucius was trying to get weekly visits and custody over half of the holidays, which was just outrageous.

He was not at all in the right mindset for another transformation now. Severus came to his room the morning before the full moon and handed him the modified Wolfsbane Potion. Remus was hoping it would work, but he was not taking any chances so he would be back to the Shack.

The potion was even bitterer this time around, Remus winced. He drank it all and made his way to breakfast. Draco was back from the hospital, hanging with Harry again so at least that was good. At the teachers' table, Minerva was staring at him, but he looked the other way. The older teacher has approached him the first day he was back, surprised Sirius was not accompanying him, and she had too many questions for Remus at the moment.

He handled his classes as well as expected with the moon this close. For tomorrow's lessons he asked Dora to take over, talk about Auror career with the oldest, maybe teach them some defense spells, cause a ruckus. Remus smiled fondly.

He skipped dinner and made his way to the Shack. He encountered no problems along the way and no new smells which was always a good sign.
Remus disrobed and folded the clothes putting them on a high shelf. The transformation started as painful as usual. The wolf wanted to howl, but Remus didn't so he managed to stop it. The wolf started sniffing, scratching at the boarded up window to get a whiff of freedom.

Remus tried his hardest to rein him in. Then a familiar smell hit him, the wolf was as surprised as Remus, but the wild side recovered quickly and took chase. The smell was close, the werewolf stormed downstairs.

Padfoot was waiting at the top of the stairs, hesitant. Remus was stunned for a moment, enough time for the wolf to give the Animagus an enthusiastic greeting. Padfoot responds in kind, nuzzling the wolf neck, scenting.

Remus tried, kind of, to keep the wolf away, but it felt so good to have Padfoot around again. They even got out; because of course Padfoot had the exit to the Forbidden Forest unsealed. Remus liked the smell of the leaves and the feel of the soil beneath his paws. They hunted, they ran and it was one of the most peaceful the wolf had been.

Remus woke up the next morning in the Shrieking Shack. His muscles arched, but he was uninjured. He caught a glimpse of a dark figure running through the trees, but made no move to rise. What should he say anyway, he was still mad, he was still hurt, and he was still… totally in love with the idiot.

He knew he would talk to Sirius again and they would be friends, but for now everything was too new and painful. For Sirius to do that, to disregard his feelings like that… Remus rose and made his way back to the castle. From the looks of it, Padfoot dragged him. Of course the dog dragged him; he didn't want to picture the alternative.

At least the potion worked, Remus remembered everything and kept the wolf at bay…most of the time.

It was Halloween night and Remus didn't go to James's memorial. He had classes that day and in the night he was patrolling with Severus. He felt bad, but he knew Lily had Sirius to go with her. He did light a candle in the privacy of his own room; James would have preferred he lit the Slytherin common room on fire. Remus smiled at that.

Severus met him in the Dungeons after curfew. They had to walk around and make sure everyone stayed in. He liked patrolling with Severus, he was quiet and professional. Remus didn't feel like talking either.

They were only one hour in their route when Severus heard a noise. Remus could smell them before they caught them, the Weasley twins as always. Severus took great pleasure in scaring them before he announced they were punished.
"I told you we should use the map," Fred nagged his twin.
"Well, you also told me you needed a snack," George piped in.
"What map?" Remus asked heart beating in his chest.
Fred turned to the teacher. "Who map?"
The twins glared at each other.
"I can handle this, Severus."
The Potion teacher sneered at them and walked away.
"You are my new favorite teacher," George piped in.
"I am naming my firstborn after you!" Fred added.
"No need, it's enough to give me the Marauders' map"
"Never heard of it!"
Remus glared at one of the twins.
"Maybe a detention with Professor Snape can jog your memory? If not his Veritaserum is truly magnificent."
The boys gulped.
"You really are Moony, aren't you?"
"You never looked the part, but…"
"The map, gentlemen," Remus smiled tense.
"It's in our room."
"I can wait!"
Remus had the map in 30 minutes. He was quite impressed, enough not to give the twins detention. They seemed very reluctant to lose the map, but were fine with no detention. Apparently Molly was quite taken with sending howlers.
Remus got to his room at the end of the route. All the way he felt the map in his pocket like it was burning him. He locked the door with a flick of his wand and unfolded the map.
"I solemnly swear I am up to no good…"

"We need a cool password to open it," Sirius's excited voice rang in the dark bedroom.
"Allohamora" Peter piped in.
"Everyone would know that" Sirius groans.
"Open Sesame," Remus mumbled into his pillow.
"Who? What?" James asked.
"A muggle story… It was a password."
"Veto!" Sirius voice rang again.
"You can't just veto my idea because it's muggle," Remus protested.
"I can veto whatever I want!"
"That's not how this works!"
"It does in this dictatorship."
"We are a democracy, that's why you have veto in the first place."
"So I have a…" Sirius started excited.
"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," James said loud enough to cover their bickering.
"I like that one!" Peter piped in.
Remus shrugged. "That can work!"
"Veto!" Sirius screamed. Three large pillows flew into his bed with different levels of precision.

If it was any night to find the Marauders' map again, of course it had to be this one. Remus stared at the contour of the school taking shape in front of his eyes. The names aligned with their beds, Harry and Draco were in the Slytherins, Severus was back in his room, the twins were in the common room and some students with unfamiliar names were sneaking in the kitchen. But tonight he was more a Marauder than a teacher.

It was cold outside, winter had come early and Remus almost forgot how cold Scotland was. He was reading a book by the fire when the map dinged. He put an extra charm of it to let him know when one of the dots he was monitoring were moving after curfew.
"Harry, I swear to Merlin if you are trying to free the Hogwarts elves again with Hermione I will…" He muttered before checking the map.

Indeed, Harry was again in the kitchen after bed, but more importantly Neville was out of bed as well. In all the time Remus had been checking on them using the map, Neville never broke curfew. He watched the dot go from Gryffindor tower down the stairs and under a passage way to the Greenhouses.

Remus didn't know if he should intervene or not. On one hand, Neville broke the curfew, but he was probably checking on his plants… He sighed long suffering and went to rescue the elves from Hermione and Harry instead.

He was half way down the stairs, when he stopped and checked the map again just to make sure Harry and Hermione were still in the kitchens, and they were. But Neville was not at the Greenhouse. Remus froze, for in the corner of the map, moving fast from the area the map covered were dots of Neville and Bellatrix Lestrange.

The Marauders' Map ended at the start of the Forbidden Forest, so he could at least pin-point the exact place they entered the Forest from.

Remus noticed that all the Dementors were following the same path as him. They must have sensed Lestrange being close, but he had no time to ponder it further. At least he reached a clearing, and for the first time in his life he wished he had strong agile paws instead of feet.

Bellatrix Lestrange had her wand at Neville's neck. Remus saw a glint in her eyes and she apparated as soon as she was out of the non-apparating zone that Hogwarts provided.
"Fuck," Remus hissed. He casted his Patronus to keep the approaching horde of Dementors at bay. The large dog nuzzled him and jumped to protect his back. The Patronus had been Padfoot shaped for a long time.

He casted a quick tracking spell homing on Neville magical energy. Before it took him away he sent his Patronus for help. He didn't have enough time for a long message or a list of people, just go for help. The dog nodded and Remus was taken away.

He apparated to the Lestrange estate. The house was deserted and the field were overflown with weeds. It didn't look like the place was visited recently. Remus could smell the grass and various small animals close by, but he also smelled fear, its acid scent permeated the air. He followed it into the house.

He found Bellatrix in the main hall. The house was dusty, but not as old or full of magic like…. other houses he knew. The main hall was pretty large and spacious, two archways on each side that opened to other areas of the house and a main staircase in the middle. Behind the staircase there were huge windows covered by an old curtain stopping most of the light from entering the hall. Of course they would try and make it as dark and gloomy as possible.

She stood with her back to him and her wand up, casting something. Neville started screaming. Remus burst in and casted a Petrificus on Bellatrix, his spell gets countered by another one before it could reach her.

He looked up. On the main staircase a hooded figure watched him with a wand drawn. Bellatrix turned to him and laughs, she flicked her wand and Neville screams louder.

Remus hid behind one of the pillars; he was outnumbered. He decided to take the new comer first. He casts Incendio on one of the dusty curtains in the hall, and the fire spread rapidly behind the hooded figure.

Remus had never been the bravest or the best dueler, but he had always been the best tactician. The hooded figure turned to cast Aquamenti on the fire that now engulfed the whole curtain. Remus casted quickly as soon as he was not under the cover of the pillars anymore; he cast a Petrificus on the hooded figure successfully immobilizing it. He didn't get to cast on Bellatrix as she quickly made her way out of the hall and deep into the house.
Remus took cover again focusing on her smell.
"Poor little wolf," Bellatrix's voice rang from the walls.

Remus felt her scent everywhere. Maybe the house was not as old, but it can cover her pretty good mixing the new scent with all the old ones in the house.
"Let the kid go, Bellatrix. He is not a challenge to you."
"This is not about sport; this is about finishing what I started. An end to the Longbottom line."
"But what glory is in that? Go for someone that can fight back."
"Your time will come too, little wolf, but for now you are nothing to me."

Remus moved quickly in the dark house. His senses were playing tricks on him; he heard her and smelled her all around so he couldn't rely on those anymore. Behind him the fire was slowly spreading to the rest of the house.

Remus found Bellatrix eventually; she couldn't resist not using the Cruciatus on Neville again. Remus bust into the room. He didn't cast anything; he just grabbed her by the throat and raised her above the ground. Her wand slipped from her hand; Remus kept pressing. He was stronger than her; he was stronger than most due to his werewolf blood.
Colors drained slowly from Bella's face. Neville hurdled into a corner.
"Moony!" Remus shivered at the voice. "Lily, take Neville!"
Remus saw from the corner of his eyes Lily helping Neville up and taking the child away.
"Moony, let her go, we've got Neville!" The voice commanded.
"She wanted to kill Neville" Remus didn't recognize his own voice. It sounded more gravely, like a howl.
"But you stopped her" Sirius said getting closer.
"I can stop her forever," Remus's shaky hands squeeze on her neck.
"This is not you, Moony!"
"I am not Moony either; this is more me than anything," Remus growled.
"No, it is not!" Sirius got behind him.
Remus turned his yellow glowing eyes on him. He released Bellatrix that fell at their feet unconscious.
"She will get back to Azkaban," Sirius reassured him.
"Good," Remus barks.

He felt his mind slipping between the wolf and the man like a pendulum. He didn't want to hurt Sirius, or Lily that was still inside the house with a scared Neville. He shut down his mind to keep the wolf inside at bay… he remembered Sirius's worried face and then darkness.

**
Remus woke up in a hospital bed in St. Mungo's. He was not feeling the wolf as close to the surface which was a blessing, but his whole body hurt.
"Are you okay?" Lily rushed to him.
"I am now."
"You did a lot of damage before I got to you."
"I know… Are… they both dead?"
"No, just that boy in the fire, we couldn't recognize him when we got there. Bellatrix… got away."
"How? We were all just there!"
"Well, I apparated here with Neville and Sirius took you. By the time anyone got there for Bellatrix she disappeared."
"I thought… I thought I killed her."
"You didn't! And Neville is okay, no lasting damage."
"That's good…" Remus felt himself shacking.
Lily took a seat by his bed, "What happened there, Remus?"
"I don't know… I wanted to get to Neville and then I felt this power surge, the wolf was so close."
"Sirius said you had yellow eyes."
"Oh Merlin, Sirius!" Remus rose from bed panicked.
"He is okay!"
"But he is not here."
"He is not here because he didn't think he would be welcomed."
"Of course," Remus looked down.
"What are you going to do now?"
"I have to quit my job at Hogwarts."
"You have to what!? You are the only decent teacher they got!"
"I am too dangerous to be around children!"
"You are the same Remus!" Lily glared at him.
"No, I am not!"
**

Dumbledore refused to accept his resignation at first, but Remus was determined and there was nothing the Headmaster could do. They compromised that Remus could only leave at the end of the term so they had at least the time in the holiday to find a replacement.

Christmas was soon upon them. Remus opted to stay at Hogwarts for it. Draco and Harry were both going home to spend the holidays with Lily and Narcissa and… Sirius. It felt weird to be so cut off, but then again all the people Remus cared for were Sirius's too. He was Harry's godfather, Draco's uncle; Remus had no claims on them.

He wondered briefly if this was how his life was going to be from now on. Solitary holidays, empty rooms and distant echoes. The idea was not very appealing…But then again it was better if he was not around people.
Lily kept insisting he should come too, but he refused. Harry looked at him dejected and packed his bag. Lucius would be spending Boxing Day with his son, but Draco would be with the others for Christmas.
Remus took a deep breath when all was gone and settled with a book he knew he would not be reading. The fire was on and he had his tea, he never really liked noise anyway.

About 20 minutes later someone knocked at his door. He looked up startled. For a second his heart stopped as he dreaded it was Sirius. But of course it wasn't. Although it was the last person he ever expected to see – Severus Snape scowling at him.
"What are you doing?"
"Reading," Remus raised the unread book.
"You know, for a Gryffindor, you are quite a coward."
Remus bristled, "I do not want to cause a scene and ruin anyone's holiday."
"Bullshit! You want to hide from your ex-boyfriend."
"He was never my boyfriend!" Remus said with more bitterness than he expected.
Severus looked at him surprised, "Then why the dejected look?"
"Severus, we are barely friends. Why the interest in my life?"
"You are upsetting Lily." Severus glared.
"They are all home…" Remus gulped. "Sirius's home."
"I know. That's why it is the best way. A familiar territory and a lot of people to run interference, you need at least to say good-bye."
"How…do you know?"
Severus glared. Remus gulped.
"Will you… if he tries to talk to me?"
Severus glared. Remus gulped.
"Are you secretly 12, Lupin?"
"If I say yes, will you glare at Sirius like that?"
"Children… I swear, why I even bother? You have 10 minutes!" Severus stormed out.
Remus stood stunned in his room.

Remus was ready in 5. He sent all his presents to Lily beforehand so he only had to dress himself. It took the other 5 minutes to will himself out of the room. Severus was waiting by the door, looking long suffering and impatient.
"Finally!" He huffed.

Severus bullied Remus into the Floo; Sirius opened it for guests apparently. Remus was the first one to enter the familiar living room. He stopped for a minute just to take it in; the house looked exactly the same. Even the smell was the same.
Severus mumbled behind him and Remus stepped away to allow the teacher passage.

"Severus, finally. Sirius is…" Lily came bustling from the kitchen and froze at the sight of Remus. "How did you manage that?"
"He is susceptible to bullying and social pressure. Should have thought of that considering his history," Severus said and stepped in to hug Lily.
The hug lasted a tad too long if you ask Remus.
"I am so happy you came!" She said and hugged Remus as well.
"Yeah, well…" Remus fidgeted.
"Everyone, Severus is here and he has a present for all of us!" Lily called to the kitchen, where everyone gathered.
"Present?" A surprised voice asked and Remus froze.
He eyed the fireplace, but Severus posted himself in front of it.
"What present could he…" Sirius started, but the words died on his lips when he opened the door.
"Surprise," Severus deadpanned in the silence that followed.
"Remus!" Harry ran past his godfather to hug him, like they hadn't seen each other just a few days ago.
Remus hugged him back absently.
"Draco, Remus is here!" Harry called.
Draco popped out of the kitchen and waved at him. A warm welcome in his books.
"Remus!" Dora barreled from the kitchen and hugged him. "I was hoping to see you this holiday!"
"I was practically kidnapped," He whispered.
"Do you want to file an official complaint?" She laughed and her hair radiated pink.
"Definitely and get a restriction charm as well."
Severus rolled his eyes and didn't dignify them with a comment.
"Do close your mouth, Siri, we have limited air," Andromeda teased walking past her cousin. „Hello!" She smiled and hugged Remus.
Remus hugged her back and pulled Narcissa in a tight hug as well.
"It's so nice seeing you" She said.
"Apparently, we should thank Severus" Lily piped in.
"Thank you!" They chorused.
"You're welcome!" Severus said unhappy with all the attention.
"We were just about to set the table," Andromeda said. "I hope you are hungry!"
"For your cooking, always!"
Andromeda rolled her eyes. "Lily made the pudding!"
"Duly noted!" He grinned.
"Oi!" Lily called.

Dinner was not as awkward as it could have been. Familiar banter and laughter all around. Sirius was a bit quieter than usual, but Remus was not saying anything either, just breathing all in. They all opened their presents and after there were only the adults with their coffees in the dining room.
"Peter ditched us all again!" Lily moaned.
"I heard all kinds of strange rumors lately" Dora piped in.
"About Peter?" Sirius asked.
"About the whole department. They are slow in catching Lestrange, apart from the Dementors, which was a highly debated decision anyway," Dora supplied; Remus was surprised to catch a glimpse of Auror Tonks instead of the hyperactive girl he knew.
"Aren't Aurors involved?" Lily asked.
"Not many… They said it's not an urgent matter and that they have no leads."
"How can they not? Bella is a creature of habit, she has no funds, no hiding place," Andromeda spoke out.
"The vault?" Sirius asked.
"Untouched" Narcissa sighed.
"And there is talk…. about something… stirring," Dora whispered.
"He is dead," Severus snapped.
"Not all his disciples are," Narcissa said shivering.
"If there was a call… we would have known," Lily said glancing at Severus.
"But Lucius and Bella both getting out!" Andromeda shivered.
"None of the others had!" Dora pointed out.
"There are not enough Death Eater left to pose a threat!" Severus said calmly.
"They will catch Bellatrix as well, sooner or later!" Remus piped in.
"Is Neville safe?" Andromeda asked.
"Spoke with his grandma, he is home for the holidays and will Floo straight to Hogwarts after," Lily supplied.
"I pray to Merlin he stays safe," Andromeda said.
"Actually, the main reason I came here today is to say good-bye. I won't be at Hogwarts for the next term and I was thinking of going away for a while" Remus started.
"Going away where? You are not renting that awful apartment again are you?" Lily asked distressed.
"No, I actually inherited a home from my parents in the countryside"
He didn't look up at Sirius. The other may not know, but Sirius would definitely know he was lying. The house had been destroyed during the First Wizarding War, but it still technically had a roof, so…

Narcissa and Draco are the first to leave, since in the morning Draco would be going to the newly restored Malfoy Manor. Harry falls asleep in the library and Remus agreed to help Lily carry him upstairs. By the time he was back, the others, traitors, had left the living room. Sirius was alone finishing his glass of wine.
Remus cursed Severus in his head. Sirius didn't look up from his glass.
"I should go…" "Your room is still…" They said at the same time.
"Of course," Sirius said after a few minutes.
"Yeah… Well…Good-bye, Sirius!" Remus fumbled awkwardly.
He stepped towards the Floo, but the whole fireplace closed with an iron gate.
Remus turned towards his friend. "Sirius!"
Sirius was closer than he expected him to be.
"It's not me!" He said.
"You are the master of the house, of course it is!"
"This is your home too!" Sirius said looking down.
"No, it is not!" Remus snapped.
"Because you just choose it's not, just like your choose what other people feel, don't you!?"
"Yes, I am free to make my own choices!"
"Since you are also choosing to abandon us and live in a shack I am going to ignore it!"
"You know what? I can apparate home!" Remus stormed towards the door.
It didn't budge, no matter how many or what level of spells he threw at it.
"Let me go!" His eyes were burning with rage.
"I just got you!"
"I am not… I am dangerous, Sirius! You saw what I can do!"
"You saved a child's life!"
"I am not in control of myself… I had to shut my own mind to stop last time!"
"But you did stop! "
"What if I can't next time?"
"I will there next time too, I love you!" Sirius screamed it at him.
"I told you to stop saying that!"
"But you didn't say that you don't! Do it, say it and I will let you go!"
"You know I care about you, you know I love you. This is how this whole idea started! You found out I love you and used that to get me to stay, so you do not have to be alone!"
"Is that what you think is happening? Is that more plausible than me being in love with you?"
"Yes!" Remus snapped.
Sirius was getting closer, Remus stepped back till he felt the wood of the door digging into his back.
"Remus, I am in love with you, have been for quite a while now. I am not lonely. I am not scared of losing people, I am not using it as a coping mechanism, I do not love an idealized version of you. I know you in and out and I love all of that!" Sirius said getting closer with every word.
"But I am not…"
"In love with me? Say that and I promise I will go!" Sirius pleaded.
"Please…" Remus didn't know what he was asking for. Sirius did, and his lips felt like they were burning over his own. Remus had been kissed before, but never like this, never like it was a hello and good-bye, like a promise and a plea all in one.
"Stay," Sirius whispered inches from his lips.
And Remus did. He stayed even if the door was opened and the fireplace was lit; he stayed even the next day when he felt he was dreaming. He stayed over breakfast and endured Lily's knowing gaze.

He stayed to eat lunch with her and Harry and have a trip to Diagon. And that night, after dinner, he stayed in Sirius's room. He ended up staying all through the winter holiday and returned only at the last possible moment.

But then it was Sirius's turn to stay. To stay in Remus's rooms at Hogwarts after long days of classes. To stay as Padfoot on full moon nights and stay the next mornings curled up around his boyfriend.