Author's note: Thank you for all of your reviews on the last chapter. Also, thank you for your patience with this ongoing story. For those of you who don't know I am a nurse on night shift and shifts can be rough. So stay safe and patient with me, please (:

Disclaimer: Unedited but if you see any mistakes please message me

Disclaimer: This chapter involves conversations of addiction, depression and therapy.

…

"And I know not everybody gets a new life

And I know not everybody gets to start over again

But I do know what I'm doing with my new life

I'll build it up, break it down, build it up"

Build It Up - Ingrid Michaelson

…

10 years ago

"She's my daughter!" Charlie shouts at Renee.

I am fifteen and just ended my freshman year at Forks High school. I was sent here after getting kicked out of a premiere private school. It was all girls and I didn't get along with them at all.

Renee is the one that sent me here. She didn't know what else to do for me. She didn't want to continue to live with someone she couldn't trust and wouldn't uphold the reputation had built for herself in her sole world of medicine.

I was supposed to be her prodigy and successor. Someone she helped build and grow after her own rise from the ashes.

She was a single mother with an alcoholic and drug addict ex who worked her way through medical school. She graduated top of her class and the daughter who was her motivation for success would be just like her when she grew up.

Except it wasn't like that.

I was more like my father than she had expected.

Little did I know, she had a plan to get what she wanted one way or another.

"She's my daughter. I raised her." Renee snaps at Charlie. "I was with her while she cried and you weren't there because you were too drunk to come home."

When Renee finally got the courage to leave Charlie, he had been on a two week bender. He came home one night to ask for money and kiss me on the forehead. After he left, my mom packed us up and moved us to Jacksonville with an aunt. She had saved up enough for tickets and had received a full ride to a local university there.

She worked her ass off to get into medical school. I'll never take that credit away from her but Charlie did a number on her. She was never the happy down to earth girl Rose described to me.

"I don't want to go." I speak up like my opinion matters.

It doesn't.

Renee will get what she wants plus Charlie has been heading down a spiral that I am too young to handle. I've been picking up after him and making sure he doesn't hit his head when he falls for months. He's drunk now which doesn't make his situation any better.

"You don't have a choice." Renee scuffs. "You're coming back to Florida with me. Look at him." She waves her judgmental hand towards him.

Charlie looks skinnier than he did when I first moved in with him. He was eating steak and potatoes every night at that time. He worked out regularly and even got a job at the police department in La Push.

It all came crashing down when an officer he had befriended was killed in line of duty. With drugs so close to his work and a need to kill the pain from losing someone close was too much.

I noticed immediately and told Rose because what else was I supposed to do? She thought she could handle him like she had in the past but it only got worse. He lost his job after being late so many times. He became unreliable, missing important dates and after school pick ups. I walked home many times or hand to get a ride from someone else.

Rose didn't call Renee until Charlie threatened her for money. I huddled her kids as Charlie tried to tower over her. In all honesty, I was more scared for Charlie than I was Rosalie. She would protect herself and her kids with everything she has in her and of course there was Emmett. He was a gentle giant until it came to Rose and the twins.

Charlie and Renee continue to argue about where I will be living now. I stand there silent because like my mom said, I don't have a choice. It's probably good that I don't because I would choose to stay with Charlie. I can take care of him, get a job and finish school. I could make sure he went to AA meetings and doctors appointments.

Who am I kidding? I could barely get myself to school on time.

"Isabella, get your things we're going. Now." Her tone tells me not to fight her. "You don't need much. Just important things."

I watch as Charlie falls apart, no longer fighting. Whatever Renee said to him, he knows she's right and I am better off with her if he's going to continue to go downhill. This will send him over the edge and I won't be in the same state to keep him from falling to the bottom.

I run upstairs to my bedroom, grabbing my phone, wallet, toiletries, and favorite clothes. I stuff what I can into two suitcases and a duffle bag.

Salty tears sting my eyes as I pull my bags down the stairs. I try hard not to fall down the stairs as I wobble and hit the side of the walls.

Rosalie is here now and her job is to manage Charlie.

I want to scream at her and tell her to let me stay with her so I can be close to him. I know it won't do any good, her hands are tied and Renee will get her way.

I choose instead to go to my dad who has moved himself from the floor to the couch. He sits with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. I kneel in front of him, threading my arms through his and hold on to him. We cry together, squeezing each other tight.

"I'm sorry, kiddo." He tells me as he cries.

It makes me cry harder because I know he is sorry and I know how much he had been trying.

If Charlie is anything in this world, it is a good father despite his addictions. He will always be shit for choosing a drink or high over his own daughter, but he did try hard to keep me away from it. He's failed me these last couple of months and he knows he can't continue to do so.

"I'll call you everyday," I tell him not wanting to let go. He smells of whiskey and sweat, a scent I have grown to know.

"Isabella." Renee calls. I don't let go and it pisses Renee off. I hear her heels against the floor then feel her hand wrapped around my arm. "Let's go." She pulls me away from Charlie.

I scream and watch as Rosalie takes my place in front of her brother. His fingers clench in a fist and he stands like he's going to come after me but he is still too drunk. He falls and Rose holds him as he cries.

We lock eyes as my mom continues to pull me away. She is frantic as she tries to close the front door and keep Charlie from throwing things. I watch the front door slam as I am thrown into the back seat and told to buckle in.

I try to open the door but she has the child lock on. I scream as she gets in the front seat and turns the car on. She buckles herself in, puts her glasses on and fixes her rearview mirror so she can see me in it.

"Things are going to be very different." She promises as she pulls away from Charlie's house and I watch as it disappears in the distance.

…

Present

It's been five days since I pushed Renee and we left our relationship even further in the pits of hell. I blacked out and lost my control of the safe haven I had built for myself in my head. Renee was able to get into my head and pull out the demons I worked so hard to lock away. It shook my world and the first few days I didn't know what to do.

It's taken me days to pull myself back together and talk myself down.

Today I feel better but I also scheduled an appointment with my therapist, Angela. I haven't talked to her since I've been back in Forks and she's based in Florida. But as soon as I could, I put my big girl panties on and reached out to her like she told me to do if I needed her. I needed her urgently and luckily video chats are an acceptable form of therapy sessions now.

I convinced Edward to finally leave me by myself. He hasn't left my side this entire time and I feel bad because I know he has a business to run. I ate, showered and did my hair to assure him that I was okay enough to be left alone to talk to my therapist. I even compromised to stay at the apartment since it was only a few blocks from his shop.

"I love you," he whispered to me, kissing my forehead.

It's weird that he has said it again to me. He said it again for the first time as I cried into his chest after Renee left. I didn't say it back because I could barely say anything without crying. I still haven't said it back though.

I want to make sure he really means it and it's not just because he saw me crumble. His words have had a habit of hurting me and I won't let them do that again. I do think he loves me and I think I love him too but he doesn't need to know that.

I close the door behind him, wrapping the blanket around me tighter. Even though the apartment isn't as big as Charlie's house, I feel more alone here. The memories we made here aren't as comforting and it makes me want to hide again.

It's noon though so I don't have time to bury myself in my sorrows because Angela is waiting for me.

It doesn't take me long before I am sitting with my laptop in front of me and Angela is staring at me through the screen. She looks so happy even though her job is heavy. Her brown eyes are bright and her skin is tan. Her makeup is natural but her lips are her favorite color pink. Her hair is in a messy bun with a pen to keep it together.

She is so put together and I alway wonder how she keeps other people's feelings from crowding her own and not driving her mad. She's good at what she does, empathetic but holds you accountable.

She isn't like those movie shrinks that just ask you how something makes you feel after you've spilled your life problems out to them.

"Hi Bella!" Her voice is chipper as she sips on a cup of coffee even though it's almost four in the afternoon where she is.

"Hey Angela." I try to keep my voice steady. She knows this is somewhat of an emergency because how quickly I needed to book an appointment which I never do.

"So what's been going on?" Her question is the key that unlocks the vault of emotions, situations and thoughts I put away to visit again later.

I flood her with everything that has happened since I arrived in Forks, Washington in October. From Charlie's death to Edward coming back into my life and finally Renee's visit.

I watch as her facial expression remains unchanged. She writes things down here and there, something I've come accustomed to. She nods to keep me going because she knows at any moment I could decide to shut down.

I feel like I am out of breath when I am finished.

"Wow," she says, sitting back and smiling. She is proud because I have never been so open with her until now. "That's a lot to unpack and I am so happy that you have decided to do so."

I only shrug because I am unsure if it is really a happy thing.

"Tell me," she continues. "What have you been doing for yourself?"

This is where therapy gets annoying. It's a genuine question because the most important person in all of this is myself. The most I've done for myself is throw a small pity party for myself the first couple days of the new year.

"Nothing I guess." I shrug.

It reminds me of the time she asked me who I was without work, a relationship and family issues. I didn't know then and I am still trying to figure it out.

She nods, non judgmentally. "Okay, let's talk through all of these new changes and situations so we can get you to a place where you feel you can handle them in a positive way."

Her words calm me and I feel like I can breathe normally again.

...

Author's note: I have been nervous about this story mostly because of how many mental health issues are involved. It still seems very taboo in the literature world but I have enjoyed being able to touch on it more than I ever have.

Let me know what you think of this chapter in a review. I will see you all for next chapter… hint… hint… we will be possibly hearing from Edward again!