What was he doing? Dancing with his assistant? Kissing her hand? Severus pulled the whiskey out of his drawer and finished it off. She was a beautiful girl, but nearly half his age. Why was he manipulating her? Playing on her emotions to get closer to figuring out the puzzle. He told himself he didn't care for the girl. It wasn't the first time he lied to himself.
"Fuck my life" he whispered to himself. Then chuckled. "Too much time listening to that girl's thoughts" he shook his head.
When the OWL results came, Severus was pleased to gain 5 students in his advanced class. Alexianna had taken over the first, second, and third year classes with ease. Her enthusiasm for the subject transferred to the students. Severus hoped she took his advice about using Legilimency in class. When the boys' thoughts wandered, he wasn't sure she would like where they go. They fell into an easy routine and he actually enjoyed letting her take over the younger students so he could focus on the advanced class. He was physically well. His scars from the attack were easy to cover and while some of the students still feared him, it had always been that way. It seems as though the students trusted the rumors of his double agency. Things were going better than he had anticipated.
One mid November evening, they were in Severus' office grading particularly long essays she had assigned to the third year students.
"Why did I assign this?"
"Because you forgot we had to grade them"
"This is painful. But I brought something to make it better" she pulled out a bottle of high quality whiskey "I always drink yours, so my treat this time"
Severus conjured two glasses and Alexianna poured generously.
She had impeccable taste. This bottle much have cost a fortune.
"How have you been" she asked setting down her quill, her honey colored eyes meeting his onyx.
"Fine"
"No. Really. I see you. I can feel that there's something... I just...I just wish you would let me in. Take some of the burden away."
"It's not your burden to carry"
"I just want to help you. Seeing the sadness behind your eyes every day... You need to unload some of the baggage. It's going to eat you alive... "
Severus wasn't sure if it was the tears welling up in her eyes or the half bottle of whiskey that they drank, but he pushed back his chair and Alexianna put her hands on his cheeks. He took a deep breath and his walls came down.