Chapter 19: Memories

Life seemed to have gone back to normal since Sylvia and Matilda came back from their time-travels. The world outside of the castle was getting into chaos but the Ministry has been keeping the secrets inside so that people wouldn't get nervous.

Loki was back. He was locking himself away from everyone else he knew at the moment. Sylvia didn't even know where he was.

The times she remembered when she was in Asgard wasn't just about her. She knew a lot more about Loki from her own memories.

-Flashback-

The two of them sat in the library, both reading books without a word.

"Loki," Odin came in, ignoring her, "what are you reading?"

When he found out his son was reading about magic, he looked angry. But when he found out the Loki was reading about the Frost Giants, he looked that he was about to attack Jotunheim all over again.

"Magic is for women," He told him, "and the Frost Giants are nothing but monsters that needs to be slayed. You just need to know that my son."

"But Allfather, the Frost Giants have amazing magic -" Sylvia tried to reason with him, defending her only friend.

"They do not, not anymore." He said firmly, "You will not interfere him as long as I live." Odin then turned to Loki, "The tutors have told me that you've been absent to your lessons, is that true?"

Loki nodded slightly.

"I will not allow that. You must learn to fight like a warrior, not doing magic like a woman."

He took Loki away by grabbing his arm. Sylvia sighed at their backs and closed the book she was reading. The title of the book was The Darkest Devil.

…

Loki ran to the gardens, to Thor, who was with his friends. He showed off the magic he learned from his mother to them, but they saw him as a girl. Tears rolled down his young face like a waterfall.

"He cries like a girl too!" Volstagg laughed, "What? Liesmith unable to talk?"

"Silvertongue turned to led?" Fandral joined in.

Sylvia walked out form the palace and moved straightly towards the crowd, "Come on, Loki, ignore them like we used to." She tried her best to say the words with some emotion, but clearly failed because it had been a long time since she had any.

"Freaks will always be with freaks." Fandral continued, not aware of what his words were leading to.

"What did you say?" Sylvia looked up to the boy three years older than her dangerously, her black eyes narrowed.

"You two are different from us, that's a fact." Volstagg didn't realize what this was going to become.

"Loki, you embarrass me in front of my friends." Thor said seriously.

"You said only girls can do magic, I'll show you how witch beats warriors." She formed a sword in her hand.

"You wanna fight?" Thor looked at her in surprise, "Be careful what you wish for, Miss Evil."

"Shut up." She shot the sword at Fandral, who nearly got hit. The sword went pass them and hit the wall meters away, making a hole in it.

"Back off if you're not gonna help." She hissed to Loki, who was still wiping away tears. Thor, Fandral and Volstagg back away to her show of power, while Hogun stood in the corner, watching without emotion.

When their small fight was over, Sylvia took Loki's hand and led him away from them.

"Don't bother us again, freaks!" Fandral shouted like he had just won the fight, while he was actually thrown to the wall by air.

Sylvia stopped, and the next moment she pinned Fandral to the wall with a knife at his neck.

"See if you dare to say it again." She growled. After trusting the knife deep into the wall as a warning, she left without another word.

…

"You're horrible at fighting." Sylvia looked up to Loki when she had just seen him in a lesson. He fought with Thor, and apparently lose.

"Like I don't know." He sighed and sat down on the grass next to her.

"You don't want to change the situation?" She stared at him.

"How?"

"Come on, training grounds." She stood up and pulled him into a standing position, "Race you there." As soon as the words were out, she shot off to their destination.

"I thought we don't play that." Loki panted as he caught up.

"We don't," She replied and stopped her pace, "it's part of training though. Now fight me." She picked up a long stick by the side.

"Wha -" Loki didn't prepare for the attack and fell to the ground a second later.

"Too slow, again." Using air to help him get up, she walked back a few steps for another round. He grabbed a spear to block her attack this time.

"You can't defend all the time," she snapped when Loki ran to the side to avoid being hit, "the enemy's aiming to kill you, not hit you."

"Not good enough." When he slashed the spear and made a close miss, she used the stick to aim another hit, "Your attacks are weak and aimless, and you don't have the spirit to fight." She easily put him down again and let him get up.

"What are you doing with him, Sylvia?" Thor came down to the training grounds, shouting, "You're not supposed to know how to fight!"

"Well, I'm not, but your brother should know how since you don't want to help him, great warrior." She stopped and rolled her eyes.

"She's right -" Loki was cut off by Thor.

"Stop lying to me, Loki. You're teaching her, aren't you?" The God of Thunder ignored their explanations.

"You got us wrong, Thor. I'm teaching him, not the other way round." Sylvia stared into his eyes, not afraid at all.

"Don't think of yourself as a great warrior like Sif, because you're not a warrior, and you're not gonna be a good witch, too."

"Thor, that's mean!" Loki tried to stop his brother.

"If I'm not a good person, then you can't complain when I kill you." She retorted to the words.

She had gone through the situation Loki was in right now and chose to let her heart blacken day by day in a kind of craziness. There was nothing wrong with her on the outside, but her inside was swelled in poison. She wasn't afraid of killing, and in fact she enjoyed it, along with tormenting, intimidating and threatening.

Without another word she swiftly dashed to the side and slashed the stick at the God of Thunder. Then, faster than lightning, she thrusted the stick into the ground deep with great force.

"You asked for it." She spat at Thor and then left alone.

"You see? I can't do any of that, she's teaching -" Loki tried to continue explaining.

"Shut up, brother." Thor growled.

…

As they grew up, Odin seemed to dislike them even more. Even the guards would be annoying to them sometimes. The only place Sylvia could have any peace was her chamber.

"…studying magic like a maiden, we should start to call you Princess Loki." A guard was grabbing hold of Loki's forearm, making him back to the wall, "You even fight like a maiden, simple throwing knives, without honor or glory."

"I demand that you unhand me this instant!" Loki shouted, trying to get away.

"We should treat you like the helpless maiden you really are." The guard moved closer.

"You'd better let him go, if you still want to live." Sylvia walked out of the shadows like she just appeared to be there, "If you do not, tell me how you want to die."

The guard stopped and froze at the point.

"Do I have to say it twice?" She raised an eyebrow, threatening in the most unobvious way.

The guard went away as soon as he could, as if running away from danger.

"I think I should have killed him when I had the chance." She turned back to Loki, who leaned on the wall, clearly frightened, "He tried to rape me the other day, pity I spared him his petty life."

"He what?" Loki recovered himself and went back to his normal self, as if nothing had just happened.

"Never mind." She changed the subject, "You need to work on your self-defense, though. I'm gonna kill some things."

"Alright, as long as it's not people you're killing." He knew what she meant by her "killing". She would "kill" things like a blank book and a piece of paper, tearing them into thousands of pieces with knives. She didn't know exactly why she did it, but it felt like letting out her anger and stress by action.

But she never killed people. She only threatened to kill, and made the threats sounded like she really means them. But she didn't kill anyone for real.

She has a poisoned heart, but Loki knew she wouldn't be evil.

…

"Did you hear that Hoder's executed?"

"Yeah, and his daughter, Sylvia…"

"Remember the prophecy?"

"You think she's the one? But she's only a bit shy and strange."

"She's the child of a killer."

"A murderer."

"She was forbidden to learn how to fight, but yet she can fight well."

"Will she murder us in our beds?"

"Who knows what she'll do in the palace!"

Sylvia shut herself away from all these rumors, trying her best to ignore them. Her father was dead, for killing Balder. But he was blind, how could have he aimed his arrow at his brother far away from the woods? He wasn't a really good father though, but he was a father, a father better than nothing and better than Odin.

"Do you still believe me?" Sylvia asked Loki quietly.

"I do." He said reassuringly, "Don't mind what they say, it will pass." It wouldn't. They both knew that.

"Go with your brother, I don't think I'll be out for a while." She sighed and walked away. She locked herself in her chamber and stared at the knives on the table. What could she do about it?

It turned out that Loki did went with his brother. They got on a bit better since Sylvia and Matilda were both gone, one shut away and one sent to Midgard.

She remembered the smug look on Odin's face when he announced Hoder's death. Could he be the one who did it? Letting his own son killing his own son? It was possible, but that makes an impossible accession for Sylvia to make.

Go away. A small voice whispered in her mind. Hide away from the rumors. Run to Midgard so that people will think you're dead. Start a brand-new life there, without any more to worry about. Run away from Odin.

It was all true, but what about her life here in Asgard? Loki still needed her as a friend.

He doesn't. He's got Thor now. the voice continued. He can do just fine without you.

Thinking back, she recalled the times when Loki was humiliated by the others. He's like that because of me. She blamed herself. I persuaded him not to give up on magic, I taught him how to use knives to defend, I asked him to spend more time with me in the library, I told him that Frost Giants are more than monsters.

She wasn't a good person, she knew that. Her life was a complete mess.

Is there a way to start again?

…

"Heimdall, I need to have your trust." Sylvia went to the Rainbow Bridge as the first time she was out of her chamber in a week.

"When have I not trusted you?" He sighed and turned to her, "What do you need?"

"You saw it, didn't you?" She demanded, knowing that he would have seen it with his powers.

"I do, but I can't tell you as an act of treason."

I knew it. "I need to know if I can start all over again someplace else. Is that possible?"

The Gatekeeper thought for a moment, then answered, "There is a way, but only a few would choose that path."

"I'll be one of the few, then." She decided to take the chance, "Tell me the way and I'll prepare everything in two weeks."

"I don't think you'll be so sure about it." She didn't take in the warning and went out of the room, only to meet Loki.

"Be good, don't fail me, and don't listen to the Allfather's lies." She said in a rush, leaving him to think about what she meant.

She was going to leave this place for once and for all.

-End of Flashback-

But she didn't know that she would come back once again.

She didn't know she would meet Loki again as well.