My sincerest apologies for the delay in posting this chapter. As I mentioned in the latest chapter of my other story, I had a bit of a family emergency earlier in the week that took me out of town. Then I spent the rest of the week catching up at work. We have started to get to parts in the story that I have pictured in my head since I started writing this story. Thank you again to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, or followed this story. It brightens my day. I have been glued to my email at work every time I post a chapter just smiling away as I read your reviews.

Chapter 6

In the morning, my resolve to go the Cullen's was shaken. I didn't know if I could face them, if I could confront them. They were my friends. What if I confronted them with what I knew and they admitted to feeding off of people? What if once I told them I knew they left, their secret now broken? What if now that I knew I was a liability? No. I shook the thought from my head. They were my friends. They would never do anything to harm me. My cell phone chimed.

Bella, are you still coming over today?

It was Alice. I wondered how she could have possibly known that my determination to visit them had wavered.

Of course I am Alice. I'll see you in a bit.

There. I had typed it. Now it was confirmed. I couldn't let my anxieties get the better of me. My phone chimed with her reply.

Oh good. I thought you may have changed your mind.

I don't know how they always seemed to know everything. Her joke about being omniscient felt very real at this moment. I quickly got ready, steeling my nerves, and headed downstairs. Charlie had already left to go fishing for the day, as he did most weekends. He had grown used to his life as a single man with no children long before I had moved to Forks, and I was not going to be the one to ask him to give up his hobbies. I did wish he had been there at this moment though. It would have been nice to see a friendly face. It wasn't that the Cullen's weren't friendly. It was that I couldn't help the intense feeling deep in my gut that something was about to fundamentally change. There was no going back. I could only hope it was for the better.

I got in my truck. It was the first time since it had been fixed that I had had the chance to drive it. I noticed with a small smile that a small dream catcher was now hung from the rearview mirror of the truck. Jake must have put it there before he had even met me. He was a good kid. I would have to make sure I called him. I pulled out of my driveway and started the drive to the Cullen's house.

It wasn't a short drive, like the one to Jess or Angela's house, but the trip down the winding forest road to the Cullen's felt short today. It was like time knew when I wanted it to drag on, so it sped up instead to spite me. As I pulled out of the thick trees and into the clearing around the Cullen house, I saw that Jasper was waiting outside on the porch. I parked my truck, turning it off. Our eyes met for a moment. He looked sad. He knows I know, I realized. I stepped out of my truck.

"Bella," Jasper said, his voice was hesitant.

I smiled weakly at him. I wanted to pretend like nothing had changed. I wanted to know him well enough that I could run and throw my arms around him, and we could just go on with our day like two completely normal people. Jasper had never been normal though, that was part of what I liked most about him.

"I was hoping we could talk," Jasper said, cautiously walking toward me off of the porch.

I leaned to look behind him. "Are Alice and Edward going to come?"

"Later. I wanted to talk to you alone first."

I couldn't help the thrill I felt at that. Jasper thought he and I had enough of a relationship on our own, that it was important enough, he wanted to talk to me alone first. I tried to fight back my smile. Jasper looked at me curiously.

"Are you happy about that?" he asked startled.

"Is that a problem?" I asked.

"No," he shook his head. "I just- I thought- don't you know?"

That sobered me fairly quickly. I would need to get my crush under control for the length of what would need to be a serious conversation. Jasper seemed to sense the shift in my emotions and chuckled lightly, shaking his head.

"You, Bella Swan, are an enigma. I can't get enough of you."

Well, damn. If he was going to go around saying things like that my crush was going to be much harder to keep under control. He's a vampire, I reminded myself. It didn't help. My heart still thudded in my chest and I felt the blush form on my cheeks. Jasper started leading the way quietly to a path into the woods surrounding the house. I walked beside him trying to regain control of my traitorous heartbeat.

The two of us walked in silence for a few minutes. I don't know how deep we walked into the forest, but eventually, we came upon a small clearing. The dense trees around us let up to make way for grass and a speckling of light purple wildflowers across the forest floor. To one side of the clearing was a small perfectly clear pond. It was peaceful, tranquil.

"Sorry," Jasper said finally, turning to me, "I wanted to make sure we had some privacy."

"Exactly how far does Edward's mind-reading work?" I asked.

Jasper laughed lightly.

"A ways, but it was more the hearing of the rest of the family I was trying to avoid."

My eyes went wide.

"Jasper, we have to be a mile away from the house," I protested.

"Luckily they aren't in the house," he said. "They have kindly agreed to go for a run the opposite direction to give us some privacy."

My head reeled.

"Are you implying if they were at the house they would still be able to hear us? All the way out here?"

Jasper nodded, observing me closely, watching my reaction.

"If they chose to. They could try to tune us out, or not listen, but this seemed more effective."

Okay, so I needed to add superhuman hearing to my list. I tried to run through every conversation I had ever had anywhere near one of the Cullen's. How many times, exactly, had I embarrassed myself? There were too many conversations to count. Certainly, everything I'd ever said at the school. I tried to reign in my embarrassment, but it was difficult. Exactly how many times had Jasper heard Jess and I talking about how hot we found him? I couldn't meet his eyes.

"Bella," Jasper said softly, "you went to the reservation yesterday?"

I nodded.

"And you learned something about my family?"

"Don't be mad at Jake," I burst out. "He thought it was just a silly superstition."

"But you don't," Jasper said. It wasn't a question.

"No," I said quietly.

"Will you tell me what exactly it is you think you learned? Last time we talked you thought my family were the X-Men. Please understand, I have to be sure."

I shook my head, staring at my feet, and took a step back.

"You're afraid," Jasper said. For the first time since I had met him, his voice was filled with so much self-loathing. It shocked me. I looked up and met his eyes.

"I'm afraid if I know the secret you guys will have to leave," I said. "I don't want anything to change."

Jasper looked at me for a long moment in shock. As he looked at me, something in his eyes softened. He reached out, laying one icy cold hand on my arm. It felt like electricity spread through my body at his touch.

"Bella, I'm not leaving unless you ask me to," he said.

I swallowed, and nodded, unable to look away from his eyes.

"Jake told us about his tribe's legend of the Cold Ones," I said, barely able to get my voice above a whisper.

"Us?" Jasper asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Jess was there, but she thought it was ridiculous. She laughed."

"Okay," he said, clearly wanting me to continue.

"He said your family were vampires," I squeaked out. My voice broke over the word.

"And yet here you are. Do you have no sense of self-preservation?"

"I think if you or your family were going to kill me, you would have done it by now."

"Not necessarily."

"What, are you trying to tell me you like to play with your food?"

It was a bad joke, but I saw the corners of Jasper's mouth quirk up anyway.

"I was more implying that a single false move could accidentally harm you. Do you have any idea how fragile humans are?" He ran his hand softly across my arm where it rested. His touch was gentle, reverent. "You may as well be made of glass, Bella."

My heart was thundering in my chest at his touch. I willed it to calm down but it wasn't listening.

"I trust you," I said.

"You trust a family of vampires?" he asked, the shock evident in his voice.

"Jake said that they Quileute's only made the treaty with your family because you don't drink human blood; that you feed on animal blood."

He sighed, dropping his hand. Guilt flooded his features.

"Just because we don't feed on humans doesn't mean we don't want to. It's in our nature. We will always be fighting against our very instincts to live the way we do."

"Jasper, I trust you and your family. Nothing is going to change that."

"Bella, don't you get it?!" He was frustrated now. I could feel it. He was projecting the emotion. I knew how hard he tried not to do that. "I nearly killed you that first day in class. I wanted to."

I blanched backward a little at this. I remembered that first day so clearly. I could still see the anger and hate in his eyes. I could still remember feeling the irrational anger he must have been projecting onto me as I sat there. Shame flooded Jasper's features. He hadn't killed me. I reminded myself. In fact, after he had very much not killed me he had saved my life. Twice. Maybe it was stupid and reckless, choosing to ignore the fact that a vampire had just admitted to having nearly killed me, but I couldn't help myself. I reached out and grabbed his hand. He looked at me with shock in his eyes.

"Why me? There was a school full of students?" I asked.

"Please, Bella, don't make me answer that."

"I think at this point we are past all the evasion. I need an answer."

He groaned in frustration, running the hand I wasn't holding through his blond curls unable to meet my eyes.

"Everyone's blood smells… different. Unique. You smell particularly appealing. The others noticed it as well. I think it's remarkably lucky that the first group of vampires you've run across doesn't drink from humans, or you would have been long gone."

"But your family, none of them reacted that way when I met them," I said confused.

Jasper laughed a little ruefully.

"No, they wouldn't have. They all have far better control than I do."

This surprised me.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Alice and I were the last to join the family. I had lived for quite a few years before I met them partaking in a normal vampire diet. We'd been slowly testing my control. I wasn't lying when I said I had been fasting the day we met. It just probably wasn't quite what you thought."

I realized that he had just confessed to essentially being a murderer to me. Exactly how many people had he killed before changing lifestyles? But then, would I condemn a lion for living off of gazelle? No. I might not recommend a gazelle run around with a crush on a lion though… I suddenly realized something.

"Wait, exactly how old are you?" I blurted out.

Jasper actually chuckled a little at this.

"Bella, is that really what you took from what I just told you?" he asked.

"You said you'd lived quite a few years before meeting the Cullen's. It seems like a fair question, and you seem to be avoiding it," I said defensively.

He smiled a little.

"Physical age or chronological age?" he asked.

"I think the fact that you have to specify means you know you should answer both."

"I'm nineteen, physically. But I was born in 1844 in Texas."

"1844?!" I sputtered out. "You're telling me that you're over 100 years old?"

"Nearly 200," he said, watching my reaction carefully.

"Are the others also that old?" I asked.

"No. Well, Carlisle is. He was born in the 1600s. The others are all from the 20th century."

"Wow," I muttered, "you must all find me so incredibly boring, like putting up with a toddler."

Jasper laughed at this.

"I tell you that you have been spending your time with essentially creepy old people, and you are worried that we find you boring?"

"You must all be so sick of dealing with teenagers by now," I said feeling embarrassed. I wondered how petty the drama of my friends must seem to them.

"Bella, you are the first interesting thing to happen in my life in over 100 years. I could never find you boring."

I found myself blushing.

"So, let me see if I have this right," he said, pulling away the hand I had been holding in mine and using it to gently tuck my hair behind my ear. It sent shivers down my spine. "You just found out that the family you have been spending a good portion of your time with are vampires, and you feel… fine?"

"As long as you guys don't have to leave, I'm not worried."

He shook his head lightly, smiling at me.

"Then I think the others will want to talk to you as well. I know Alice has been waiting rather impatiently."

"She could have just come with us to start with," I said with a laugh.

Jasper shook his head. "She's already planning her next sleepover with you. She gets enough alone time. Now that she and Edward have joined our drive to school, I don't get any."

He sounded like a petulant child. I laughed out loud, feeling thrilled and a little emboldened by the fact that he wanted to spend alone time with me.

"Well, Alice has her sleepovers. You could always, you know, invite me to do something with you too," I said.

A look of sadness flashed through Jasper's eyes, but it was gone almost before I had time to notice it.

"Bella-" he said his tone tense. All my self-confidence from the previous moment came crashing down.

"I'm sorry. Forget I said anything. I shouldn't have assumed-" I said starting to babble, looking down at my feet.

He reached out and brushed his cold fingers across my cheek. I looked up at him.

"I would love nothing more than to spend every spare moment of your day with you, but it's not safe. I'm not safe."

"Oh," I said wishing I could disguise my emotions from him. Disappointment. Hurt. He had to be feeling it all.

He reached down and took my hand as he started walking back toward the house. It felt oddly intimate. This boy was going to give me emotional whiplash.

When we made it back to the Cullen's house, Alice was standing outside with a wide grin. As soon as I neared the porch she zipped quickly in front of me, moving so fast she was a blur and threw her arms around me in a hug. I noticed with a pang of regret that Jasper had dropped my hand.

"Bella! Oh, I'm so happy you finally know. I've known we were going to be good friends since the day Jasper stopped that van. Like sisters."

I smiled, pulling back from the hug.

"Thanks, Alice. But I thought you guys weren't at home?" I looked back at Jasper questioningly. I hated the thought that they may have heard our whole conversation.

"We weren't," Edward said, suddenly appearing by Alice's side, "but Alice saw when you guys would be back so we came back to meet you."

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

"Oh, I see the future," Alice said.

I laughed. "Nice try guys. You aren't going to get me with that joke twice. I know it may seem like it to the practically eternal vampires, but I wasn't actually born yesterday."

Edward grinned at me. Jasper chuckled, coming up beside me.

"This time they mean it. Alice has visions of the future or at least possible futures. The future can always change," he said.

"Some things," Alice said evasively.

"I'm sorry, are you trying to tell me you can actually see the future? You do realize how absurd that sounds, right?" I said.

"You just accepted that you spend your time with a family of vegetarian vampires with remarkable ease, but this is what is holding you up?" Edward asked, grinning.

"And how do you know that I accepted it easily? I thought you couldn't read my mind," I said.

"Alice had a vision of your conversation with Jasper," Edward said with a grin. "I saw it in her mind."

I groaned.

"So there really is no privacy with you lot?" I asked.

Jasper just shook his head ruefully. "You get used to it," he said.

"Doubtful," I grumbled. Alice just laughed cheerily, and the three of us walked into the house.

"Now you know, we can give you a tour!" Alice said. That thought cheered me up. She led us all up the stairs and to the mysterious hallway I had never been shown down before. "This is where everyone's rooms are. The first one here on the left is Carlisle's study."

She opened the door and walked through. I followed her and was deeply embarrassed to find that Carlisle was in his study deeply engrossed in a large medical book. I felt like I was intruding, but he looked up and smiled warmly when we walked in.

"Bella," he said in a kind voice, "it's good to see you again. I hear you have been entrusted with the family secret."

I nodded, feeling nervous. Jasper rested a hand on my lower back. I felt calmer. It wasn't even his mood control. I just felt calmer knowing he was right there next to me, with me.

"I promise I don't plan on telling anyone. You don't need to worry for your family," I said.

Carlisle just continued to smile at me. "I was never worried, Bella. I trust Jasper's judgment."

As we talked, I glanced around the room. It was filled with books and antiques and classic-style paintings. I realized that they probably hadn't been antiques when Carlisle had come into possession of them.

"Can I- am I allowed to ask now how your family all came together?" I asked Carlisle. Something told me that on top of being the oldest, he was also their leader.

Carlisle smiled and gestured for me to sit in the armchair across from him. I did. The others remained standing, but Jasper moved to stand behind the armchair I was now sitting in.

"Each of the kids would need to tell their own story, but I can briefly tell you how we all came together from my perspective," he said. "I was turned in the 1600's in London. My father was a pastor. He spent his time hunting vampires, werewolves, and witches. Back then, such things were far more accepted as reality. However, one such hunt led to a vampire turning me. I had no desire to be a vampire, to kill others. I fled human civilization, unable to bear what might happen when I could no longer resist the call of blood. I was driven nearly mad by thirst when I first caught and fed on a deer. That was when I learned how I would survive.

"And survive was what I did, all I did, for hundreds of years. I craved companionship. I stayed with other vampire covens from time to time, but I wanted to find a family like me. I think the loneliness had driven me quite out of my mind by the time I turned Edward in 1918. His mother died of the Spanish Flu in a hospital I was working in. She begged me to save her son, but he was dying as well. It was never my intent to change anyone, to curse them to this half-life."

He let out a soft sigh and looked up at Edward. Edward made his way across the room and rested his hand on his father's shoulder, squeezing it.

"Edward resented this life for many years. I worried that I had cursed him to an eternity of unhappiness for a long time," Carlisle said sadly.

"But not anymore," Edward said. "You did the right thing. Fate was saving me for Alice."

He smiled over at the girl who beamed at him.

"Next was Esme," Carlisle continued, smiling at his son. "I had met her once when she was a little younger than you, just a girl. She had been hurt falling from a tree. In hundreds of years, no human had made an impact on me before. When I found her lying, nearly dead in a hospital morgue several years later, I couldn't help but turn her. Something in me said she needed to be saved. I worried she would hate me for cursing her as well, but from the moment she opened her eyes, she was thrilled."

"She had fallen in love with him at first sight when he set the break in her leg all those years ago. To her, an eternity with her angel of a doctor sounded like heaven," Edward said with a small smile. "There is no one I have ever met whose thoughts are easier to listen to than Esme's. She is like sunshine."

"Next was Rosalie," Carlisle said, his face clouding over. "Esme and I had found such happiness together, that when I found Rose in the street, nearly dead, I turned her with the futile hope that she might bring Edward some happiness."

My eyes shot up to Edward in shock. He grinned back at me.

"As you can see, that didn't work as planned," Edward said.

"Rosalie and Edward have always loved each other, but as nothing more than siblings. In the beginning, both of them were so upset to be what they were. I hated what I had done. I vowed never to turn anyone else. But Rose had different plans. She was out hunting one day when she came across Emmett. He had been mauled by a bear. He was nearly dead. I don't know how she did it. She was still just a newborn herself. She must have held her breath the whole time she carried him. Even then the blood would have been difficult to resist. But she ran with him all the way back to the house and begged me to save him. I didn't understand at first. It was too late for any human measure to save him. Luckily Edward could read her mind. He explained that she wanted him turned to save his life. We were all together around 15 years before Alice and Jasper joined us," Carlisle said.

"Scared us too," Edward said. "They showed up while Emmett and I were out hunting. By the time we walked back through the door, Alice had already convinced everyone to love her. Then, she walked right up to me and showed me visions of all our possible futures together. She already knew what I could do. It was impossible not to fall in love."

"And what about Jasper?" I asked, turning in my chair to look at him.

Alice laughed her tinkling laugh.

"Jasper came because I had convinced him of what I could do and I told him that our family was out there waiting for us somewhere, but he took a while to warm up to family life," she said.

"Did you not have a family before?" I asked, feeling sad for him. Did that mean he had spent 100 years as alone as Carlisle had been? Jasper grimaced a little.

"No. I didn't have a family before. That's a story for another day, please Bella, trust me," Jasper said looking uncomfortable. I was curious, but I didn't push.

"Does someone have to be dying then, to be turned?" I asked curiously, turning back to Carlisle and changing the subject. I could sense Jasper tensing behind me. I had meant to change the subject to make him feel better, not worse. I hated that I may have blundered. Was there vampire etiquette that I had failed somehow?

"No," Carlisle said. "That is simply my own condition. I would never trap someone in this life if they had any other choice." He looked up and met Jasper's eye. "But now I think I've held up the tour long enough. It was lovely getting to talk to you more, Bella. I hope we will be seeing you around here more. I find it's quite liberating to have someone we can be ourselves around."

I smiled at him. "I'll come over as often as you'll have me."

I stood and the four of us left Carlisle's study, Alice leading the way.

"This is Edward's and my room," Alice said brightly, swinging open the next door.

It was a large room, lined with shelves of books, CDs, and vinyls. In the center of the room was a large four-poster bed. There were various chaises and armchairs in the room as well as an electric keyboard, much smaller than the grand piano downstairs. To one side stood a large walk-in closet, the doors to which were open. I could tell it was Alice's room because of the way the closet was practically bursting with designer clothes. Jessica would have had a conniption if she saw it.

"Do you play the piano?" I asked Alice.

"No, Edward does. I stick to art and fashion design," she said.

I grinned at her. "You design clothes too? Don't tell Jess. The two of you will have no need for me anymore."

She laughed. "Don't be silly, Bella. You're irreplaceable."

It was such a kind thing to say. My heart swelled. I wasn't sure how to respond, so I changed the subject instead.

"You know, I had a feeling you and Edward shared a room. He looked like I was stealing you away from him that night I stayed over," I said.

Edward chuckled softly, walking over to Alice and placing a kiss on the top of her head.

"I can't say I'm used to having to share my wife's time with anyone," he said.

"You're married?!" I asked, feeling shocked. I tried to remind myself that they were much older than they looked.

Jasper laughed this time.

"Yeah, between them and Rose and Emmett we usually have a couple of weddings a decade to attend. Rose and Alice like getting to play with all the new dress and decorating trends," he said, giving Alice a playful grin.

"My dress from the '70s was my favorite so far," Alice said with a dreamy sigh.

"Can I ask, why do you guys pose as high school students? Isn't it weird for you?" I asked.

"The younger our ages when we start in a city, the longer we can stay before moving. Eventually, though, people start to notice that we look too young, and it becomes time to move on," Edward said.

"Do you go to college too?" I asked.

"Of course," Jasper said, "I think by this point Carlisle holds every degree imaginable. Edward and Rose might have to start cycling through old ones soon. Alice and I got our start a little later, so we have a few less. Emmett mostly enjoys the parties of college. I think he's rushed for every frat imaginable, not that he ever actually joined any."

"Wow, and here I thought being in advanced placement in Phoenix made me impressive. You guys must kill at trivia nights," I said, then grimaced. "Sorry. Bad figure of speech."

Jasper laughed. "I can't say we've ever been to one, sometimes we have our own family game nights. We can't do trivia though. Edward will always cheat and pull the answers from someone else's thoughts, or Alice will just get a vision of the correct answer."

"It's not cheating," Edward said with a sly grin. "It's merely using all the resources available to me."

"Yeah, I don't know, as the human here I am going to have to call it cheating too," I said. Jasper grinned at me.

"Biased. Of course, she was going to side with you," Edward said defiantly.

"Well, now you have a taste of what the last 60 years of my life have been like," Jasper said.

Alice just smiled and skipped up, lacing her arm through mine.

"Now boys," she said, leading me back into the hallway, "no bickering in front of our guest."

The two of them grumbled but followed us.

We continued down the hallway, but suddenly our way was blocked as a fuming Rosalie materialized in front of us. I cowered backward. I had never actually spoken to Rosalie or been this close to her. I knew she didn't like me, but she looked mutinous.

"No," she hissed at Alice. "I don't care that the rest of you have decided to throw reality out the fucking window. I am not going to be a part of it, and you certainly won't be giving a tour of my room just to please her."

I saw Jasper tense behind me in my peripheral vision, but Alice just stayed perfectly still and calm.

"I was never going to show her your room, Rose. I was taking her to Jasper's," Alice said.

Rosalie huffed. "I'm sure," she said, rolling her eyes.

"Rose," Jasper said, his voice tense, "not the time."

"I'm sorry, Rosalie. I didn't mean to upset you," I said hating how meek my voice sounded.

"Don't apologize to her," Jasper said stepping forward between me and Rosalie. "She is the one who should be apologizing."

Rosalie laughed a cold, angry laugh. "Me? I'm the only one in this house with some fucking sense right now. You know what Alice saw."

"I already told you and everyone else that I wouldn't let that happen," Jasper said tensely.

"And exactly how much self-control do you think you have? What about when she begs you? Can you resist her? She's already here. Already ready to risk everything. She has a life and is so willing to throw it away to become one of us. It's a fucking waste," Rosalie spat out.

My head spun. Become one of them?

"I'm sorry, what?" I said, interrupting them. Rosalie looked past Jasper to glare at me.

"You heard me, Bella. You are throwing your life away. Do you know what someone like us would give to have what you have? It's a waste. You are wasting your life," she said.

I shook my head feeling confused.

"I don't want to be a vampire," I said looking at the two of them as if they'd sprouted extra heads.

"What?" they asked at the same time, turning to look at me. I felt Alice and Edward's eyes on me as well.

"I don't want to be a vampire," I repeated. "Why on earth would you guys think I want that? I have a life. I have a family. I have friends. I can't give that up."

"Alice had a vision," Rosalie said. Her voice was softer now. She was looking at me appraisingly.

"You said Alice's visions could be wrong. That they were subject to change," I said, looking at Jasper.

He nodded.

"Bella," Alice said softly, placing her hand on my arm, "some of my visions are more certain than others…"

"Well," I said, desperately grasping for a logical reason, "I had a dream last night that I was a vampire, that Jasper turned me, after I found out about you. Maybe that's what you saw."

The four vampires looked skeptical.

"That's not really how it works, Bella," Alice said.

"But Edward can't hear my thoughts, right? So who's to say if your power doesn't work differently on me as well," I said, feeling surer the more I talked myself into it.

"I suppose…" Alice said, still looking unconvinced.

"You really have no desire to be a vampire?" Jasper asked, looking down at me.

"No," I said. "Sorry."

He smiled so widely it surprised me at first.

"Please, don't apologize. Nothing could make me happier to hear. I would never want us to take your life from you," he said.

Rosalie looked at me for another moment. "Okay," she said finally, stepping aside.

Jasper started to lead me down the hallway further.

"Where are you going?" Rosalie asked. I turned, and she had opened the door to her room. Alice and Edward were stepping inside.

"I thought you didn't want-" I started, taking a cautious step toward her.

"I didn't want to know someone suicidal. So long as I know you aren't willing to throw your life away, you're okay by me," she said.

"That was your problem with me the whole time?" I asked as I stepped into her room. It was bigger than Alice and Edward's had been. Emmett was inside smiling widely at me. As soon as I walked through the door, he wrapped me in a giant bear hug.

"Bells, I'm so happy to finally meet you," he said.

"Uh, you too?" I said with a small laugh. Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"You could have met her anytime you wanted to, Em," she said.

"You know I've always got your back, babe," Emmett said to her.

"I am sorry, Bella. I just- There was so much I wanted from life that I never got the chance to have. All of us. We were changed so young. Don't misunderstand, for us the only other option was death. I'm not angry at Carlisle, but I would never wish this upon someone who had another choice," Rosalie said, shrugging.

"Jasper once said you were jealous of me. Did he mean you were jealous of the fact that I'm human?" I asked her.

She glared at Jasper.

"He shouldn't have told you that, but I suppose you're right," she said.

"If I promise to stay human, can we be friends?" I asked tentatively.

She studied me for a moment, as though trying to decide if I was sincere, then nodded.

Emmett let out a whoop and Rosalie giggled. It was the first time I had heard her laugh or seen her smile.

"But now, it really is my turn," Jasper said gently pulling my arm to lead me out of the room.

"For someone who's nearly 200 years old, you are remarkably impatient," I said with a chuckle.

"Yes, well, I've waited 200 years to meet someone like you. I think I'm allowed to be a little impatient," he said opening the door to the last room in the hall.

The inside of the room was incredible, filled with dark greens, rich brown leathers, and wood accents. There were bookshelves all over and what must have been a hand-carved chess table. I noticed the others hadn't followed. Jasper shut the door behind us.

"See, you can't say things like that after telling me it's not safe to spend time with me," I said, not able to meet his eyes.

"Bella," he said softly, instantly by my side. He lifted my chin up so that I met his eyes. "You have to understand, it isn't safe to spend time with me. That doesn't mean I don't want to spend time with you. But I want you to be safe."

I didn't want to answer that, so I turned to look around his room instead.

"Jasper, you don't have a bed," I said in shock.

He rubbed the back of his neck with the hand.

"I don't sleep," he said with an awkward shrug.

"Ever?"

He shook his head.

"But everyone else had a bed," I said confused.

Jasper laughed awkwardly.

"They don't use them for sleeping," he said.

The realization dawned on me, and I felt myself flushing a deep red.

"Oh," I said. "It must get awkward sometimes living with three couples."

He laughed. "I suppose it would be better if I didn't have to feel their lust for each other all the time-"

"You can feel lust?!" I whispered horrified. I knew I was beet red. Oh God. How embarrassing. I wondered how many times he had caught me lusting after him. Bury me now and get it over with.

Jasper just smiled that cocky grin of his, taking a step closer to me. I backed up but was now against a wall. If he got any closer he would be pressed up against me. He tucked my hair behind my ear again, this time tracing the line of it with his fingers, running his hand down the side of my neck and letting it rest where my neck and shoulder met. My breathing hitched. He leaned down to whisper in my other ear.

"It's an emotion, Bella."

I felt goosebumps rise across my flesh.

"I'm not actually sure it is. It's one of the seven deadly sins." I was trying desperately to keep my voice sounding normal, casual.

"So are greed, pride, wrath, and envy. Those are all emotions." His thumb gently brushed across my skin as he spoke. God, if he could feel lust I was sure he was having a field day. "Don't be embarrassed. I quite enjoy it from you."

"I'm not actually sure you're ego needs any help," I said, trying to sound teasing but my voice came out more like a desperate whimper. Pathetic. I was pathetic. He had made it quite clear he had no intent to date me.

He chuckled softly, straightening up but not backing away to put any distance between us. I took a moment to let my breathing calm down.

"You seem to have come a long way from wanting to kill me that first day," I said eventually.

Jasper smiled self-deprecatingly. "Yes, well I've never made the mistake of being that thirsty again. Not if I'm going to be around you. I've been hunting every day. It's hard. The only animals close by are deer. They taste terrible."

I looked at him horrified. "Jasper! You said that you were practicing your control the day we met. If you hunt every day, doesn't all that practice go out the window?"

"It doesn't matter. I don't want to risk you. And I'm far too selfish to give you up."

"It absolutely does matter. I won't be the reason you give up on all your hard work. I trust you not to hurt me. You have to trust yourself."

One time, when Renee had first met Phil, she told me that he looked at her like she hung the moon and the stars. I thought it sounded sappy at the time, but that was the only way I could think to describe the way Jasper was looking at me now.

"You really do trust me, don't you?"

"Of course."

It didn't feel sappy. It felt wonderful.