Chapter Sixteen

Later that evening, after the commotion of the arrest of the Headmaster and two prominent Gryffindors had calmed down; Harry was sitting in his dormitory thinking about what the best way of dealing with the Weasleys when they arrived was going to be. However, he didn't have as much time as he thought he would.

"Master Harry," said a little elf wearing a pink dress with little yellow flowers embroidered on the hem and steel toed Muggle military combat boots, as she popped into the room. "You's is having visitors you's is."

Smiling, Harry asked, "Is Rita here to do a follow up article on the reactions of the wounded savior?"

"No, it isn't being her Master Harry. It's is being the Weezys."

"What?" asked Harry in astonishment. "They aren't supposed to come until tomorrow."

Putting her little hands on her hips, Eppy replies, "Well, they is being here now. That red-haired woman who's is being round all over is looking like she's is about to be storming the castle alls by herself."

Smiling with incredible mischief or was it pure evil, it's so hard to tell in these old castles that do not have adequate lighting. I mean come on, how a kid is supposed to study if they are making themselves go blind. You'd think someone would have thought of this before.

"Eppy, where are my dorm mates?"

"They's is being in the common room."

"And Ginny? Where is she?"

"She's is being in the common room consoling that pesky blond haired Muggle born boy who's is wanting to be you's butt servant."

"Huh? Oh Colin. Never mind him," Harry said absently. "Here's what I need you and Dobby to do for me…" Then Harry gave her the instructions he wanted done before hopping off the bed to gather up what he needed.

"Oh Master Harry, you's is being all bad, you's is. You's is making Eppy feeling all dirty. You know," she paused to point, "done there."

"Um, glad I could help. Now get going, if they are in the castle we don't have much time."

Giving him a toothy grin, Eppy says, "Okay," and pops away.

x-x-x-x-x

"Harry," Seamus said as he came into the room with Dean, Neville and Ginny in tow. "What's going on?"

"Good, you're here. Okay, I need the biggest favor from you four. The Weasleys are here early and will most likely want to see me."

"Mum and Dad are here too?" asked Ginny.

"Apparently," replied Harry, "and I have a little surprise in store for them, but I need your help."

"I'm in," Ginny said immediately.

"Count me in too," Seamus said not wanting her to out do him.

"You don't even know what I have in mind."

"Harry," Ginny said as she crossed her arms, "my mother is trying to turn me into your whore to keep her and Ron out of jail. Do you honestly think I am in any mood to deal with one of her tantrums? Besides seeing what you did to Ron and Hermione, I suspect I will want to be there to watch."

Harry looked at the fiery red headed girl in awe. Something deep inside of him reared its head and made its presence known to him right at that moment.

'What the hell was that?' Harry thought to himself, but shook it off, he had work to do.

"Okay here's what I have planned…"

x-x-x-x-x

About an hour later, Harry and the others had everything ready. All they needed was for the Weasleys to find them and then the fun would begin.

"Ginny are you sure you're okay with this?"

"It's a little late to ask me that now Harry. I'm already sitting in the middle of it and it's too late to back out now."

Harry rolled his eyes. She had a point.

Turning his head to look behind him and said, "How about you Seamus?"

Seamus wrapped his arms around Harry from behind and said, "I like it where I am now," and nuzzled into the nape of Harry's neck.

"Horny Irish pervert," Harry muttered which caused both Ginny and Seamus to grin. Harry was about to say something else, but they suddenly heard voices from the other side of the door. Time for indecision was up, the show was about to start.

"I don't care what he's doing, I want to see him now," shouted the irate voice of one Molly Weasley through the door.

"But Mrs. Weasley, I told you he's busy right now," Neville's muffled reply came.

"Mum, you're not really in a position to be dictating to him, maybe you should calm down."

"You watch your mouth around me Bill Weasley, I'm your mother. Now where is he?"

"In there," Dean said, barely audible.

Suddenly the door burst open and in came the Weasley family led by Molly to find Harry Potter naked in the large claw footed bathtub, taking a leisurely bath with both his fiancé to be Ginny Weasley and his dorm-mate Seamus Finnigan.

"OH MY HEAVENS! WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE!" she bellowed.

"What does it look like?" asked Harry sarcastically. "I'm taking a bath."

"GINEVRA MOLLY WEASLEY WHAT ARE DOING IN THAT BATHWATER WITH TWO NAKED BOYS?" continued the Weasley matriarch.

"Research?"

"I'm not a boy, I'm a man now," Seamus said darkly. "I'm of age."

"Actually," Harry began, "I think the question should be, 'What the hell are you doing spoiling my special time with the two people who are my in competition to become my mate?' That is since you barged in here uninvited."

"Harry James Potter! You have some explaining to do young man!"

Okay, let's think for a moment. Does Harry react well to these kinds of accusations and ill temperament? I mean really have you been paying close attention to the past thirty five chapters? Well you know, except for the angst and the pseudo gayness that was thrown in as a red herring, (or was it) Harry has been all about getting back at the people who have wronged him in some fashion or another.

"I have some explaining to do?" said Harry in what was close to cold fury. "I have some explaining to do?" he repeated for effect. "You are the one who decided to whore out your own daughter to cover up the fact that you stole from me. Stole my gold! Robbing from me, raping my family name!"

However, before Harry's anger could go further, the water between him and Ginny started bubbling and suddenly a large neon pink round thing emerged from the water. The neon pink thing rose from the water slowly and finally perched itself on the side of the bathtub.

"Master Harry," Eppy said as she removed the goggles and air hose from her face. Eppy was wearing a neon pink scuba diving suit with bright yellow flippers and an air tank strapped to her little back. Holding up a toothbrush sized brush and a wash cloth she continued, "Eppy is being all pleased to be telling you that you's enour… enour… really big penis is being all squeaky clean now."

"Thank you Eppy," Harry said politely, "that was very kind of you to do that for me."

Everyone stood in silence and shock as they watched this, except for Seamus and Ginny who were holding back their giggles.

"Whoring out our daughter?" Mr. Weasley broke the silence and asked as he turned to his wife, trying the best to ignore that his youngest child was naked in front of him. Well actually she is covered by bath bubbles up to her shoulders, so really not that much is being exposed.

"Didn't she tell you?"

"Molly what have you done?" Mr. Weasley asked ignoring Harry's barb.

"Yes Mollywobbles, tell your husband what you have done," Harry said nastily.

"Mollywobbles?" Seamus asked.

"That's what he calls her when they get funky with each other."

Ginny gasped, "My parents do NOT get 'funky'!"

Harry and Seamus looked at the girl at the other end of the tub. "Ginny, they have seven kids; I think the funk has come to live at your house."

Ginny shuddered and the three went back to paying attention to the elder Weasleys.

"I don't think I know you anymore Molly," Mr. Weasley said in exasperation. "First I find out that you stole gold from Harry, though at the time you did it I could have understood, if I had known, but we do owe him the galleons back. Now you've offered him our daughter … our baby girl … up like some kind of sacrificial offering without even telling me first. What were you thinking?"

"Well, you see, Arthur," she stammered, as the wind had completely been taken out of her sails. Let's face it a house elf cleaning someone's penis is not an everyday occurrence. Well maybe at Malfoy Manor, but not here. Oh come on, you know they would do that just to be evil.

"Yes, Mollywobbles," Harry said, trying to help her along. Yeah that's it, to help her.

"I just didn't want to see my little boy going off to Azkaban for something that couldn't be helped," she cried. "He's just a little boy and the Dementors can do terrible things to young people."

All the color immediately drained from Harry's face.

"Yes, Mrs. Weasley," Harry said through clenched teeth, "please be so kind as to inform me what it is like for a young man to be around Dementors twenty four hours a day, seven days a week for one year, three months, two weeks, four days, seven hours, thirteen minutes and twenty six seconds? It seems that I wouldn't possibly be able to comprehend that information in my tiny little mind."

A dull thwack sound could be heard in the room.

"Oh be buggering it!" exclaimed Eppy who had of course changed out of her neon pink wet suit and into her black leather cat suit with the stiletto heals. "My whip is being all too wet to be cracking it."

"I … well, you see … OH THERES NO TALKING TO YOU WHEN YOU ACT LIKE THIS! Ginny get out of that tub this instant!"

"STAY. WHERE. YOU. ARE!" growled Harry, talking to Ginny, but looking at Mrs. Weasley. "If you think for one moment that I am going to allow you to further humiliate your daughter by forcing her to parade naked in front of a room filled with boys you have another thing coming!"

The creature in Harry's chest that awoke earlier was not happy with anyone seeing Ginny naked. Harry noted it, but didn't have time to think about it. Especially since he had his head up his own arse about his feelings for Seamus after Charms class today. If he weren't enjoying himself right now, he would be a basket case with all of these conflicting emotions.

"She's my daughter!"

"My fiancé! Remember, you gave her to me."

"ENOUGH!"

Everyone, including Harry and Mrs. Weasley turned to look at Bill.

"I think it would be a good idea if we all left them for a moment to get out of the tub and get dressed while we all wait in the common room for them," Bill said reasonably, though he was looking rather irate.

"I can't allow her to be naked with two naked boys in the same room," Mrs. Weasley countered. "It just isn't right."

Seamus scoffed, "Really? Then what would you call Ron moving into the Head Girl's room with Hermione at the beginning of the year then? Cause that's what he did."

"You didn't tell me that," accused Harry. "I could have had so much fun with that information."

"Slipped my mind," Seamus said cheekily. "I was too happy to have you back in the castle to worry about what he was doing."

Harry closed his eyes, sighed and seemed to sag back into Seamus' broad naked chest as the Irishman wrapped his arms tighter around him. When he opened them again he saw Neville and Dean escorting most of the Weasleys from the room except Bill and Charlie who were each staring at him with raised eyebrows.

"What?"

"You can't have Ginny you know. She is not up for grabs like some piece of merchandise. She is an almost grown woman and has the right to make her own decisions about when and who to marry," Bill said seriously.

"I know that."

"Good. I also know that this is nothing more than a stunt you pulled to rile up mum," Bill continued. Then smiled and said, "and it worked."

"Everyone needs a hobby," Harry said with a smirk. "However, she still made the offer through Ron and it has to be addressed."

"I'll take her place."

"What? Bill asked looking at his brother.

"I said, 'I'll take her place'," repeated Charlie. "If Harry is trying to decide between a boy and a girl to be his mate, then I have every right to take her place since I am older than she is and as such, all of the boys should have been offered up first."

Everyone stared at Charlie curiously as Harry got out of the bathtub.

"MY GODS HARRY," exclaimed Charlie making Bill turn and look. "YOU'RE A TRIPOD!"

"Yeah and you can't have it," growled Seamus as he also emerged from the tub.

Ginny giggled and said, "You should see him with an erection if you think its big now."

"GINNY!" Harry said with a blush.

Bill looked murderous and asked menacingly, "Why has my baby sister seen your erection?"

To Be Continued … Please Read and Review

I have no plans on moving this story to any other site mostly because I like this one. However, I have been reading stories and when someone objected and complained to the powers that be, the stories mysteriously disappear. Sometimes all an author's works go away as well. Also, that was one of my first reviews in chapter 34 and since I'm still around, I guess it was an empty threat or the powers decided that I am classified correctly. I'm not worried, just wanted to warn everyone.

To remind everyone, I am not making Harry gay, straight or bisexual. For those who are thinking this is going to be slash, which are fun to read sometimes, keep the faith, I do have a plan!